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[Parting Sorrows and Many Thoughts] (Chapter 1) 

Parting brings sorrow and longing.


My wife, Wang Yue, and I were university alumni. I graduated in 2000, and she in 2001. Medical schools

generally have more women than men, especially when groups of nurses' white legs swept past my window. Only

one song could express my feelings: "My Heart Soars."


Speaking of pursuing my wife, I was practically reciting poetry every day and singing songs every night. I even infiltrated the literary society, reciting

poems and composing verses with her. Slowly, we started flirting. Actually, I really dislike the word "flirting,"

but I'm not exactly a respectable man. A strong, muscular man driven by sex, encountering a beautiful, delicate woman who

also loves literature—of course, I couldn't force her. The consequences of forcing myself on her wouldn't be much better than rape. But


for this 21st-century sex fiend, it was all a minor issue.


For six months, I practically lived in the literary society. This resulted in my prose poetry skills still exuding a domineering aura.


Of course! Just an aura… hahaha!!! Enough said, let's get back to the point.


Today I saw several elderly women who had suffered heart attacks, and I joked around with them a few times. These old kids believed me,

got ultrasounds, ECGs, and even added 24-hour cardiac monitoring, and were prescribed a bunch of traditional Chinese medicine. I think these

women didn't have medical insurance, otherwise I would definitely have ordered a coronary angiography. Although I'm a doctor, there's no

reason not to take the money; I can get at least 40% commission for each prescription. If the hospital could perform stent placements, these old folks

would have been bankrupted by me long ago.


After work, Wang Yue called me, saying she was having dinner with a friend and asked if I wanted to come. I said, "

How can so shallow? All you know is eating, why don't you obediently go back to bed and let's have some fun together?"


She whispered, "Get lost."


I deliberately raised my voice and said, "Barbie is waiting for you in bed. As the saying goes, 'Stopping the carriage to admire the maple forest at dusk, the frosted leaves are redder

than...'"


She didn't even finish her sentence and hung up the phone.


He knows my temper; I generally don't like socializing with others, and I usually don't talk about meals with him…


Why think so much? I'd better just check out my First Club Forum. Wow!


This girl is really pretty…


Around 10 pm, I suddenly felt a surge of desire, but my little brother wasn't erect. Maybe I'm getting old.

This is bad; I'd better go to sleep. I turned off the computer, took a cold shower, and quickly went to bed.


I didn't hear the door open during my sleep, but because I talked too much at work yesterday, my whole body ached, and

I gradually entered a state of ecstasy.


The next morning, I had just woken up and was touching my wife next to me, preparing for our daily rounds. "Hmm?" "

Wang Yue ." I shouted loudly.


After a while, she poked her head out from the bathroom: "What? I… I'm a little unwell, just taking a shower."


"Wife, your husband was exhausted yesterday, aren't you going to reward him?" I said with interest. "I don't have

time " he shouted.


"There's still time," I said impatiently, scratching my head. "We need to have a baby soon,

or my parents will break my little arms and legs!" I quickly added, "I got my period today, maybe tomorrow,

honey !" He replied immediately.


"Why don't you take your nutritional supplements first?" Maybe he'd understand I'd change my mind.


"You've been saying that for almost a month," I replied disappointedly, but still picked up the cup and drank the medicine in one gulp.


Actually, we've been married for over a year. But we still don't have a child, which greatly

troubles . I secretly had a colleague do some tests, but they didn't find anything wrong. I advised Wang Yue to go to the hospital for a comprehensive

checkup, but she said she was afraid of the doctor's big forceps and wouldn't go. I persuaded her many times, but she still didn't go.

I secretly took her pulse countless times while she was sleeping, but I still couldn't find anything wrong. To be honest, my wife

is healthier than me, which makes me start to doubt myself again.


I've always been physically weak, but through exercise and studying medicine, I regularly take care of myself, like taking nutritional

supplements daily and getting traditional Chinese medicine every few days. My health is still okay now.


But my wife is naturally energetic, and since she doesn't drink or smoke, she shouldn't have any health problems. I

married her to give me a whole football team's worth of children, so why isn't she doing that now? Tomorrow I'm going to

drag to the hospital for a checkup, otherwise I'll either die from worry or from exhaustion in bed.


People rely on energy and spirit; how can I work efficiently when I'm preoccupied with worries? How can I fool these old folks? So,

at work, I became distracted and ended up prescribing the wrong medicine. Luckily, my colleague at the pharmacy

told me privately, otherwise I would have been mortified. But by 11 pm, I started feeling drowsy. I remember a

classmate in college who got a girl pregnant and then started borrowing money everywhere. He even blocked the dorm room door. I was desperate

, so I offered some humanitarian aid, taking out two hundred-yuan bills from my pocket and saying he didn't need to pay it back.


Actually, this money was counterfeit money I'd been hoarding. That idiot was in such a hurry he didn't even look before stuffing it into his pocket.

Later, I heard he had to call a classmate for help because he didn't have enough money for the hospital. And now, as a medical student, I often encounter

people who cheat and deceive—is this karma? The more I thought about it, the more annoyed I became, so during my lunch break, I asked my supervisor for leave, saying

my wife was sick and I needed to go home to take care of her.


My wife works as a nurse at a private hospital; she's relatively relaxed, working only one day out of two. Although I

'm a doctor with a three-day rotation, internal medicine doctors often have big cases coming up, so I'm always working overtime

. Plus, I'm only in my early thirties, so I need to work more overtime to save up for baby formula. Those older professors see patients in a day, which is more than I do in two…


Lost in thought, I went to the restroom to prepare my hands, and when I looked down, I saw a bottle of cosmetics I'd never seen before.


I picked it up and saw it was a bottle of cream. My

English wasn't good in college, and I haven't looked at English for almost eight years, so I didn't know anything. I only knew it was a bottle of cream.


So I searched online for La Prairie's Advanced Ceramide Cream. The price was 10,000 RMB per ml. Seriously?

That than a month and a half's salary! Although I might seem a bit unconventional, I

don't have many bad habits besides drinking a little. I grew up in the countryside, and although my family moved to the provincial capital when I was ten,

we still have some traditional values of frugality. I've inherited my father's style; besides

necessary expenses, all the money goes to my wife. But this isn't fair! You're practically a celebrity!


I never restrict my wife's cosmetics; after all, good skincare is good for me too. My wife usually...

Although I like to buy cosmetics, it's usually just things like Lanc?me; it doesn't have to be this extravagant.


Thinking of this, I suddenly remembered Wang Yue from two weeks ago.


"Waaah... Husband, slow down! Why are you acting like a bull? Don't you recognize me?" Wang Yue gasped.


"I'm going to fuck you to death, you slut!" I gasped, sweating profusely.


"Are you crazy?! Ah, you're hurting me!" Wang Yue screamed. She pushed me away.


"You're not a virgin, don't be so coy with me, I'm your husband," I said bluntly.


I was enduring the intense surge of lust, my hormones surging like a river. But Wang Yue showed no

sign of continuing. She got up, put on her clothes, and pushed open the door, leaving behind the words, "I'm going to my mom's house."


I angrily put on my clothes and chased after her, but I stumbled and fell to the living room floor, hitting my head

and getting a bloody bump. I immediately fainted. I didn't wake up until morning, dragging my heavy body,

I washed my face and went to work.


This girl, she didn't sleep with me for two weeks, bought such expensive cosmetics, and didn't come home all night.


Suddenly, I picked up the phone and called Wang Yue, "Where are you? Come back right away, it's urgent."


He said in surprise, "I'm at the hospital. What's the matter that's so urgent? It's not that you're going to…" "

No , it really is urgent." "Go home now," I interrupted him.


Half an hour later, Wang Yue returned home.


I went berserk, grabbed his hair, and roared, "I've treated you like this all these years, and you

've cheated on me!"


Wang Yue struggled, saying, "Honey, listen to me, let me go, I'll explain." He broke free

and ran to his storage cabinet.


Before he could explain, I shouted, "Two weeks ago, I was intimate with you and you said I was crazy. You didn't come home

all night , and what about that La Prairie cream in the dressing room? Explain your nonsense!"


I had never been so agitated. As my voice grew louder, I couldn't hear what Wang Yue was crying about anymore. Suddenly,

my head felt like it had exploded, and everything went black. I fainted again.


This time, I woke up in a hospital bed, next to a haggard-looking Wang Yue. He saw I was awake


and asked, "Is your head feeling better?"


"Head? I just have a heartache," I replied coldly.


"Qiangzi, you've misunderstood. Let Dongzi explain," Wang Yue said softly. Just then, a

tall , handsome doctor walked over. I recognized him immediately—wasn't that our college classmate, Li Dong?


"Qiangzi, although this news might be a bit unbelievable for you, it's all true. The brain CT

scan shows that the frontal area of your right brain suffered severe trauma in childhood, and in the past two weeks, this trauma has been aggravated,

causing you to experience temporary schizophrenia. This is why you've been experiencing hallucinations or delusions lately."


He then slowly added, "Wang Yue told me about your situation. I feel you need to continue to be hospitalized for observation."


To be honest, I'm a medical student, and I know very well what schizophrenia is. I casually picked up the CT

scan and glanced at it. It was indeed trauma, but something felt off.


So I said, "Honey, my mind is very confused right now. You should go home first. I want to talk to Dongzi."


Wang Yue then left the ward crying, her figure gradually disappearing from sight.


Dongzi then said, "Qiangzi, take your medicine first." I saw him take a bottle of pills out of his pocket, pour out five

pills, and give them to me. I looked at the grayish-white pills and felt like I'd seen them somewhere before. I thought to myself, "I'm a medical student

, have I seen all kinds of medicine? Whatever, I'm too tired, I'll just take the medicine and sleep." So I took the pills.


Then I slowly said to Dongzi, "You mean I really have schizophrenia? And hallucinations? This kind of plot only

happens in movies. Are you kidding me?" "


I can't joke about things like this. You're my college classmate. About three months ago, Wang Yue told me you were acting strangely, giving me specific details. I felt you had mental problems," Dongzi shrugged and replied, a half-smile on his face. Even I, a doctor who's seen so many patients, found it strange.   "Is there any cure?" Actually, asking was pointless. Because I knew that this kind of traumatic mental illness was incurable. Unless you surgically remove your frontal lobe and become an idiot, you'd be mentally ill for life.   Dongzi then said, "It depends on your willpower. If you know you have a mental problem, as a doctor you can control yourself."   Hearing Dongzi's words, my eyes started to droop, and I drifted off to sleep.   While asleep, I had a dream. "In my dream, Wang Yue was still so charming. She opened her arms to hug me. I ran towards her as fast as I could, but in the blink of an eye, I saw Wang Yue had turned into Dongzi, standing there motionless. I ran towards him, but he kept getting further and further away."   Then came a series of movie lines. The one I remember most clearly was, "If one day I can't help but ask you, you must lie to me!"   Then came a series of hazy memories. When I woke up, I found myself in the same hospital bed, and Wang Yue had left me a note.   "Qiangzi, since you have this illness, I need to talk to your hospital leadership first and ask them to help you get six months of leave. I'll come see you again tonight."   I lazily looked at the neat handwriting, as beautiful as her figure, but I had no . I got out of bed without saying goodbye to anyone, walked out of the inpatient department, and went home.

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