[A Mother's Account of Incest (Part 1)]

[A Mother's Confession of Incest (Part 1)]
Author: Attending Physician
Word Count: 6450
Published: February 11, 2017 There
are some things I've kept inside for a long time, and I've wanted to confide in someone, but I haven't been able
to find a suitable person to talk to, so I'm very distressed.
The reason I say I haven't found a suitable person to confide in isn't that I
don't have any close friends, but rather that what I want to say is too private, even too absurd and shocking,
making it impossible and unthinkable for me to tell my friends.
But keeping it all inside is too painful. For a while, I suspected I would go crazy because of it!
During my most confused period, I stumbled upon a website through a chance encounter. Here,
I saw many articles about mother-son incest. I don't know how much of these articles are true,
but I think that since so many people are writing these things, and so many people are browsing them,
it at least shows that mother-son incest does exist, and I'm not the only one doing it, nor is it
as heinous as I previously imagined. You've probably guessed what I'm about to say. Yes—I 　　committed incest
with my own son ! 　　After revealing this secret, I felt much lighter and more at ease, as if a 　　huge weight had been lifted from my heart. 　　Before I knew it, I was a middle-aged woman. In my youth, I was beautiful—I had 　　a classic oval face, a tall figure, fair skin, and long legs. Some people said I looked a bit 　　like Joey Wong, and I thought so too, just not as alluring as her. Now I 　　'm almost forty, and my figure and looks are not what they used to be. Although my son often says I'm sexy, that's just him comforting 　　me; it's not true. I attended a vocational school, so my education level isn't too low. I remember 　　when I was in middle school, our Chinese teacher always liked me, praising my writing and 　　often reading my essays aloud in class. Now I want to write down my experience for everyone to see, partly as 　　a way of venting, and partly to hear your reactions. 　　Here is the story I want to tell. 　　Three years ago, before we bought a new house, the three of us were crammed into a tiny 30-square-meter apartment 　　. Since there was only one bedroom, our thirteen-year-old son shared a bed with my husband and me. 　　Everyone who knows my husband knows how volatile his temper is. He's usually 　　alright and loyal to his friends, but if anyone angers him, he'll go berserk and beat them mercilessly 　　. The neighbors all know his temper, so they avoid him. 　　My husband and I have been married for sixteen years. The main reason I agreed to marry him was 　　because he worked for a large state-owned enterprise. However, less than two years into our marriage, the enterprise went bankrupt, and we 　　only received a meager minimum living allowance each month. 　　When the company was doing well, my husband's temper wasn't too bad, and he worked hard. But when 　　the company went under and there wasn't much work to do, his temper worsened day by day, and 　　he developed a drinking problem. Every time my husband comes home drunk, he takes his anger out on me and our son at the slightest provocation, so we're both 　　afraid of him. 　　My husband has a very strong sex drive; he wants to have sex with me about every two days. 　　He doesn't care if our son sees us, and he often strips me naked in front of him. I say, "Don't do this, 　　our son is watching." He replies, "What's there to be afraid of! Our son isn't a stranger." I say, " 　　Aren't you afraid he'll learn bad habits?" He says, "He's not young anymore; he should know how to play with women." 　　I don't dare disobey him, so I just let him do as he pleases. 　　With such a shameless father, our son is naturally no better. Every time my husband and I have sex, 　　he hides and secretly watches. No matter what I say, it's useless. After it happened so many times, I just stopped 　　paying attention to him. But I always feel a little strange when I'm having sex with my husband. 　　One time, after my husband and I had sex, I was just about to fall asleep when I felt someone touching my genitals. 　　Without even looking, I knew it was my son touching me. Firstly, my husband always falls asleep quickly after sex 　　and never touches me again; secondly, the hand that touched my genitals was so soft and small, it couldn't possibly 　　be my husband's hand. 　　I was furious and wanted to kick him off the bed, but I was afraid of waking him 　　, so I didn't dare make a sound and just pretended to be asleep. If my husband found out, he definitely wouldn't 　　forgive our son and might even beat me too. Perhaps because of my indulgence, our son started touching my 　　genitals frequently, and I could only pretend not to know, which was really a headache. 　　One day, my husband came home drunk and went straight to sleep. I had only been asleep for a short while when 　　our son reached over and started groping my genitals. I pretended to be asleep as usual; it 　　wasn't the first time he'd touched me like that, and I was used to it. But unexpectedly 　　, after he touched me for a while, my vagina became wet, and a gush of fluid came out. I think it might be because 　　my husband hadn't fucked me for a few days, and my sexual desire hadn't been released. 　　Embarrassingly, my vaginal fluid sprayed directly onto my son's hand, startling him so much he didn't 　　move for a moment. After confirming I wasn't awake, he continued touching me. Perhaps because my vagina was 　　lubricated by the fluid, it became very slippery, and this time he actually put his fingers inside me, imitating my husband's 　　usual intercourse, using his fingers as a penis to poke and prod me, making me very uncomfortable. 　　But I couldn't lash out, so I just moved my buttocks closer to him, because that position felt more 　　comfortable. 　　While I was torn, unsure whether I should speak up and stop him, my son suddenly 　　withdrew his hand from my vagina. I thought: maybe he'd had enough? At that moment, I felt a little regretful, feeling 　　an emptiness and discomfort in my vagina. 　　My conflicted feelings at that moment weren't surprising, because when a woman's sexual desire is aroused...

After arousing myself, I always have an instinctive reaction, an irresistible urge to reach an orgasm.
Just as I was caught in a dilemma, my son behind me made a new move! This time, he
pressed his body against mine. I was startled! I realized he had pulled down his
underwear, and his hard penis was directly against my vulva.
My heart pounded wildly. I knew what he was about to do, and I knew
what it meant. No, I had to stop him! But what should I do? My husband was sleeping right
next to me, and he'd had too much to drink. If I woke him up, my son and I would be in serious trouble!
My son's penis explored between my legs very gently and carefully. He was clearly wary of his father
, not daring to make a sound.
Perhaps my son lacked sexual experience; his penis grazed past my vulva several times. I thought
: I can't let him continue like this, or he'll eventually break into my secret place
!
I wanted to stop him, yet I didn't. In that brief moment of hesitation (actually, only a few
seconds), my son's penis found the opening he was looking for, and
with a "slip," it slid into the vagina that had given birth to him (or rather, "slid in
," as my vagina was already very wet, and it didn't seem like he had much effort).
Although only a small part was inside, my sensitive vaginal walls could already feel his penis
.
Oh! What a terrible thing to do! My son's penis had actually entered his own mother's vagina! Now,
saying anything was useless! His penis was already inside; what was
the point of stopping him? Incest between mother and son had become a reality!
I was both shocked and terrified! What shocked me was that my son would be so audacious and shameless, daring to have sex with his own
mother; what terrified me was that my son and I had actually committed incest, and if my husband found out, the
consequences for us would be dire.
At that moment, my mind went blank; I didn't know what to do. I racked my brains but couldn't make up my
mind. Instead, the more my son fucked me, the more wet I became, so I finally decided to continue pretending to be
asleep.
Thankfully, my husband was completely drunk, sleeping soundly beside me like a dead pig, even snoring. Although I
knew that incest between mother and son was a taboo act, a crime punishable by being drowned in a pig cage in the past,
my son's penis was already inside me; incest had already happened,
and there was no use in being afraid. So I simply stopped thinking about anything, subconsciously telling myself: I
'm asleep! I'm asleep!!
And so, I offered no resistance to my son's first violation, instead bending over and letting
his penis thrust in and out of my vagina. Ah, it's truly shameful! I
knew perfectly well that having sex with my son was immoral and shameful, yet I felt a guilty pleasure.
However, I was slightly disappointed that my son didn't last long before ejaculating, and all of it went inside my
vagina. After ejaculating, his penis remained inside me until it slowly softened
and slipped out.
I maintained the same position, my buttocks pressed tightly against my son's lower body.
Although his penis had softened and slipped out of my vagina, the glans was still trapped between my buttocks. My son and I
remained in this intimate, pressed-together position in bed until I estimated he was asleep, before I dared
to get up to go to the toilet to wash myself. When I caught the milky white semen flowing from my vagina in my hand
, my feelings were incredibly complex. I thought to myself: This is my own son's semen!
I can't believe I was penetrated by my own son! My son is not even fourteen years old, still a minor.
It wouldn't be surprising if he did something outrageous. What's surprising is that I, as his mother, didn't
stop him in time! I sighed softly, cleaned my vagina inside and out, then
took a towel back to the bedroom and carefully wiped his penis clean, helped him put his underwear back on, and then
went back to sleep.
That night, I had many wild thoughts and tossed and turned, unable to sleep well.
When I woke up the next morning, my son looked at me strangely. I guessed he was wondering
why I wasn't angry with him. As a mother, of course I have my pride. It's not that I didn't want to be angry with him
, but I didn't know how to tell him. This time, my son's mistake was different from before. Was I supposed
to tell him, "You brat, why did you fuck your mother's cunt last night?"
Since things had come to this, I could only pretend I knew nothing. Although I knew this was just an ostrich mentality
(burying one's head in the sand to escape reality when threatened), my son and I both
knew the truth, but as long as we didn't say it, we wouldn't feel too embarrassed.
As the saying goes, "Everything is difficult at the beginning." After that first time, the second, the third… seemed
to become natural. From then on, every time my husband finished with me, as soon as he started snoring,
my son would carefully insert his penis from behind, as if the two of them were playing
a relay game of sex with me on the bed. At first, I was a little embarrassed and gave him some hints, not wanting to let him do this
; but he completely ignored my warnings. For example, once when he was
thrusting his penis towards me, I deliberately rolled over slightly, the meaning being clear: "
Stop it, Mom's still awake!" But guess what he did? He completely ignored me! He just
pulled my lower body towards him, making my buttocks face his penis again. Worried that the noise
would wake his father, I only offered a token resistance before he penetrated me. Every time
this kind of struggle with my son ended with my vagina being conquered by his penis,
it became numb after a while, so I simply stopped resisting and even enjoyed it, only pretending to be asleep
.
During that period, apart from the incestuous sex at night, my son and I maintained a normal mother-son relationship during the day .
Regarding our relationship, when he's naughty or disobedient, I still discipline him as usual. However, sometimes
when I'm scolding him, I suddenly think about the fact that he had sex with me the night before, and I feel a little uneasy, afraid he'll retort
, "I've already fucked your cunt, what right do you have to lecture me?" Thankfully,
my son has never talked back to me like that, and in my opinion, since he had sex with me, he seems to have become
more obedient than before, and his studies have improved considerably.
Looking back now, my son is mostly quite well-behaved and willing to help with housework,
but occasionally he can be a bit unruly, especially when his dad goes out to play cards. Knowing his dad won't be back for a while
, he becomes very unruly. For example, while I'm doing housework, he'll suddenly come over and touch my buttocks,
ignoring me no matter how much I scold him. Seeing that he doesn't do anything too outrageous, I let him
touch me. At first, he only touched me through my pants. Later, seeing that I didn't say anything, he put his hand inside my crotch
and touched my buttocks against my skin. I'd gotten used to him touching me for a long time, so I let
him. But then he went too far and tried to pull down my pants. I refused and slapped his hand hard. He probably felt
some pain and pulled his hand back. But after a few days, he forgot the pain and tried to pull down my
pants again. This went on and on until I gave in again, letting him pull my pants down to my ankles.
I did housework while he touched my buttocks. That wasn't enough; he then went on to touch my vulva.
I often felt itchy inside my vagina from his touch, and my vagina was wet, but I absolutely refused to let him penetrate me.
That was my bottom line. I could pretend not to know at night when I was sleeping, but
it was hard to explain if he penetrated me in broad daylight.
Once, I was taking a shower in the bathroom when my son suddenly pushed open the door, saying he needed to pee. He
pulled out his semi-erect penis right in front of me. Seeing that he hadn't urinated for a long time, and was just
playing with his penis until it was big and hard, I said, "You little rascal, what are you doing
?" My son looked at me with ill intent and said, "Mom, what should I do if I can't pee?" I
said, "If you can't pee, then don't!" My son grinned and said, "Mom, I feel so uncomfortable if I don't pee
." Of course, I knew what he wanted to do, so I ignored him. He then simply took off his underwear, and with his erection, he
started to grope me. To be honest, I was tempted at that time. My vagina was already soaking wet,
but the sin of incest between mother and son was something I couldn't bear. So I resisted desperately. Seeing
how determined I was, my son had no choice but to give up his idea of raping me. He said, "Mom, can you let me touch you
?" Seeing his pitiful look, my heart softened and I gave in to him. In this way, I
compromised with him another step. From then on, every time I took a shower, he would come in and touch me, saying that he was going to help me dry my body,
but actually he would grope me all over, from my breasts to my buttocks, from my labia majora and minora to my clitoris and vagina.
Although I cursed him for being a scoundrel, I actually quite liked being caressed by him like that. Women all
have the desire to be needed, and I was no exception. So every time I took a shower, I would deliberately choose to
shower when my husband wasn't home, so that it would be convenient for my son to come in and touch me. No matter what, I wouldn't allow him to violate
me in broad daylight. Our interactions were limited to touching. After several failed attempts, he gave up on
the idea of openly committing adultery during the day and continued to be content with the situation of touching openly during the day and having sex secretly at night.
Actually, I wasn't at peace during that time; I was constantly in a state of contradiction
: on the one hand, I allowed my son to sexually assault me, and on the other hand, I had to maintain the image of a normal mother in front of him
.
During that period, my son and I remained peaceful during the day, but at night, after my husband fell asleep
, my son would come and have sex with me. It was dark at night, and neither of us could see each other, so
I let him penetrate me. My son became more and more skilled. For the first two months, I often worried about
not being able to reach orgasm, but later I could reach orgasm every time. Sometimes, when my husband was out playing
mahjong, my son could have sex with me several times in a row, ejaculating his semen all over my vagina. However, my son
is a clever little devil. He knows what time his dad usually comes home and always leaves
me about ten minutes to clean up afterward. I don't care about being shy; after we're done, I go to
the toilet naked to clean up the semen in my vagina before he falls asleep, and then I use a wet towel to clean his penis. Every time I wipe
his penis, my son looks at me with a grin, looking like he's really enjoying it. But neither of us
says a word, as if nothing has happened between us if we don't talk.
I keep switching between these two completely different
roles in front of my own son: a strict mother and a harlot. But since we've already had a physical relationship, sometimes when I'm being harsh with him, I inevitably feel a bit
weak-willed, and even appear outwardly fierce but inwardly cowardly.
I remember once my son did poorly on a midterm exam. I questioned him about why he did so badly, asking if he
hadn't studied properly. He nonchalantly replied, "Mom, I was just a little careless during the exam
. I'll definitely do well on the final exam." I hated his nonchalant attitude and suspected
he might not take my words seriously because he'd slept with me. At that moment, I don't
know what came over me, but I suddenly flew into a rage and slapped him across the face,
leaving a clear five-finger mark on half his cheek. My
son seemed stunned, forgetting to cry. I was also shocked by my own actions and couldn't speak
. My husband was the first to react. He snorted and cursed, "You bitch,
even if he deserves a beating, it's not your place to hit him."
Then he kicked our son hard in the butt.
That afternoon, after my husband went to work, I regretted hitting my son too hard and wanted to
apologize, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. I was so anxious that I broke out in a sweat. I decided to take a shower first, and I
had just taken off my clothes when my son came in grinning, the five finger marks on his face still fresh!
I glared at him and said, "Can't you see I'm taking a shower? What are you doing here?" My son shamelessly...
He said, "Mom, I just wanted to make amends by helping you wash up!" Feeling sorry for the
slap he'd just received, I went along with it, saying, "Good thing you know what's good for you! If you do this again, I'll
castrate you!" My son quickly stripped naked, and hearing my words, he grinned and handed me his penis
, saying, "Mom, this was purely accidental. If it happens again, just cut it off."
I chuckled at his words, and my remorse vanished. What happened next is
probably obvious to everyone. I quickly transformed from a strict mother into a wanton woman. Under the
guise of helping me bathe, my son groped my entire body, and then
brazenly inserted his right index and middle fingers into my vagina, making me gush with fluids until I came.
Seeing my state, my son thought he could take advantage of the situation and thrust his rock-hard member towards my
genitals, only to be kicked away by me. He was helpless and resorted to masturbation to relieve himself.
Thanks to my son's magnanimity, that incident passed smoothly, and our relationship remained
unaffected. Although I didn't say anything, I was actually quite grateful for his gesture.
My son and I played this cat-and-mouse game of cat and mouse, and although our mother-son relationship prevented us from
going all out, it was still incredibly enjoyable.
However, one night, a small accident occurred.
(To be continued)

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