It's just loneliness.

A night alone, and the loneliness is still so palpable. I hug my legs, burying my head between them. How long has it been since I've been so immersed in solitude? But tonight, I don't want to embrace this feeling; I just want to relieve my physical and mental exhaustion.
I enter a chat room with only two English letters, randomly typing in a nickname. Although I publicly identify myself as a lesbian, it seems many men are still interested? Perhaps it's out of a sense of challenge, or perhaps they're all the same with the lights off.
"Hey, mind if we grab a drink? ^_^"
Looking at the nickname, 40 and still using such a cute emoji?
'Ugh~ What are you up to, old man~'
"Nothing much, just seeing how you are, I thought a drink would cheer you up. I can even give you a massage~ and a bath will make you feel much better."
Hmm… that sounds pretty appealing… I definitely need to relax my tired body.
'Really? I'm so tempted~ (eyes shining)
' "Really? Where are you? I'll come get you."
'Wow~ So thoughtful of you~ I'm on xx street, is that convenient for you?'
"It's not far, wait for me at the 7-Eleven at the alley entrance, my car is…"
'Okay~ I'm wearing a light blue shirt and shorts, waiting for you~'
"See you later."
I changed my clothes, sprayed on my usual CK, and went to wait, lighting a cigarette while waiting. When did I start smoking...? Probably when I was immersed in grief, the unhealed wound always aching, as if it was bleeding even if I ignored it. Only through nicotine entering my lungs could I find relief. Hmm... why am I thinking of her again...?
Soon I saw a Mazda 5 pull up, the window rolled down,
"Hey, kid, get in."
'Huh? I'm an adult now, still
calling myself a kid.' "To me, you are~ hahahahaha,"
the uncle laughed heartily, walking around me to fasten my seatbelt.
"Let's go."
We
didn't talk much on the way, but the music kept us from feeling too awkward, and the air freshener in the car made me feel quite relaxed.
Soon we arrived at a motel near the 7th Redevelopment Zone. 　　The older man took my hand and led me upstairs.
" 　　Do you want to shower first? You'll probably be shy if we go together, so you go ahead." 　　Hmm… thoughtful… a plus. 　　We both finished showering quickly. 　　The older man opened the red wine he'd brought. 　　"Have some wine, red wine is good for girls." 　　"Wow~ Let's drink~" 　　After a few drinks, my tense body began to relax. 　　Looking closer, the man was quite fit, unlike typical middle-aged men with excess fat. He clearly worked out; although he didn't have a six-pack, he was quite muscular, and his small mustache was cute. 　　"Come on, let me give you a massage." 　　The man took my hand and led me to the bedside, placing a pillow for me. Without hesitation, I took off my towel and lay down. 　　"Let's begin. Tell me if you feel uncomfortable." 　　Immediately, I felt a pair of thick, rough hands cover my back, and they began to massage me rhythmically. Hmm…pretty good…it felt so good I was about to fall asleep… 　　"I'm going to start massaging your thighs now. I might touch your private parts a little. Tell me immediately if you feel uncomfortable." 　　"Hmm..." I could only manage a casual reply as my consciousness began to fade. 　　But gradually, I started to feel something... different. When those hands touched the delicate skin on my inner thighs, it was like an electric current shooting into my brain, and I unconsciously let out a muffled groan, 　　"Are you uncomfortable?" 　　"No...it feels good...keep going." 　　Why is it so hot...and his massage is really good...but why does it feel so strange... 　　the hands on my legs, intentionally or unintentionally, touched my private parts, but not very close. Ah...it seems... 　　gradually, the fingers got closer and closer, I felt those hands gently spreading my thighs apart, and as they approached the inside, the pressure noticeably increased. 　　This continued for several minutes, the feeling growing stronger and stronger. A kiss landed on my back, a tingling sensation spreading across it. A warm breath came from behind my ear, touching my sensitive spots, and I was almost losing control... 　　"Hey, you're wet." 　　 "It's all... um..." Embarrassment and annoyance turned towards the assailant behind me. Before I could finish speaking, lips covered my face, a tongue aggressively invading, relentlessly probing. I, in a frenzy, wanted more. 　　My body was flipped over, and those thick hands covered my chest, kneading it lightly and heavily. His mouth gradually moved down to the other breast, gently biting and licking the nipple. Under the simultaneous assault from both sides, I was almost overwhelmed, yet unwilling to let him leave, I pressed my lips closer to my chest. As if encouraged, the person on my chest increased the pressure, soon moving down to kiss the inside of my thighs, parting my vulva, but doing nothing, just watching. 　　"Um... what are you doing..." 　　"I'm admiring it," he said playfully. 　　"You... ah..." Before I could protest, he continued. His kiss 　　landed on the protruding spot, the sudden stimulation making me tremble involuntarily. 　　"Mmm..." 　　A warm, wet sensation enveloped me, a nimble tongue licking and occasionally sliding past the entrance. Just when I felt I was about to reach my limit, his tongue suddenly entered the opening, gently thrusting in and out. I couldn't control myself anymore; I wanted more... 　　"Please... give it to me..." 　　"What do you want?" 　　Though he spoke, his actions continued. 　　"I...want...you to come in..." 　　He pulled off the towel, and his muscular physique beneath me excited me, yet also frightened me. Could I really handle it...? But desire overwhelmed my reason; all I wanted was for the emptiness beneath me to be filled. 　　He grasped his muscular member and slowly entered, gradually thrusting to the deepest point, but... There were no unnecessary movements, just kissing. The 　　discomfort below had subsided, but there was an itchy sensation, making me move involuntarily. He began to move slowly, only thrusting in and out gently. 　　I started to feel a slight pleasure, but it wasn't enough, I wanted more… I wanted more… My hips moved in rhythm with his, and he increased the force, each thrust reaching the deepest point. 　　"Ah…" 　　The stimulation was so intense that I couldn't help but cry out. 　　"I love hearing your voice, cry out," 　　he commanded, making me obey unconsciously. 　　"Ah… so good… fuck me… fuck me."

Receiving the encouraging message, his lustful eyes seemed to pierce through me. He flipped me over, gripped my buttocks, and continued thrusting relentlessly. It seemed he was penetrating even deeper than before; my mind was blank, only filled with moans.
"Ah…you…so good…so good…please fuck me to death…"
"You're so tight…it feels so good…"
He flipped me over again, scooped me up, his huge cock still inside me. The sudden movement startled me, and I cried out, but the overwhelming pleasure left me no time for surprise; the intense sensation filled my mind. This middle-aged man was just holding me and thrusting into me like that.
"Hoo... Was that good?"
"Yes... Yes... Uncle, you're amazing..."
"Oh... Darling... If you squeeze any tighter, I'm going to come..."
"I... I'm almost there too... Ah..."
"Let's come together... Ah..."
She felt her vagina contract, and unconsciously hugged the uncle tighter. Then she was gently placed on the bed, and she felt the erection inside her slowly fading.
"Hoo... Sweetie... That felt so good."
"Hoo... Me too."
She nestled shyly against his firm chest, hugging him like that, feeling a touch of warmth. Then she regained some of her rationality, left that warm place, walked to the window, and lit a cigarette.
"Will we ever see each other again?"
She smiled without answering, only giving him a kiss . "
Let's go."
"Are you sure you don't need me to take you home?" "
No, it's close anyway. You should go home now, drive carefully.
" "I'm off then."
She watched him leave, lit another cigarette, took out her phone, found his name, and deleted it. Deleting that wanton self seemed like an attempt to cover up the fact that it had only just happened. Anyway, it was just loneliness. No longer capable of loving anyone, what right did she have to harbor any affection or lingering feelings for the person she had a one-night stand with?
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It's just loneliness.

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