My happiness is going wild again because of you... (repost)

1. You really couldn't resist. Your imagination was probably driven by the allure of beautiful areolas, a singular and clear longing under a clear sky. Or perhaps, you just wanted to see me, to see what I looked like… I hadn't seen you all day. Yet, this meeting filled me with gratitude. You have a much stronger heart. One dinner, several people I didn't know, and you, with me. Almost everyone I know would marginalize me, hide me away, and secretly be very affectionate (at least it would seem so), but ultimately, they have many concerns. Their lives are something I could never touch. Of course, I'm a sensible woman, and I never intended to cause trouble for others, nor am I aware of my awkward situation… But you really startled me; you made me both excited and apprehensive… I went to the meeting with a feeling of testing, seeking confirmation, and experiencing. I took a careful shower, did a face mask, and got ready. I didn't want you to see my exhaustion from the past few days. On the subway, I smiled radiantly, my gaze towards everyone was incredibly gentle. A little girl stepped on my foot, and my bright smile caught her off guard for a moment. I was happy, overjoyed to see you. My phone was in my hand, constantly ringing with your greetings. What did the long hours of standing and the crowd matter? You were waiting for me at the end. 2 Entering the restaurant's private room, you exchanged greetings and shook hands. I nodded and smiled, and you gently introduced me. Everyone nodded and smiled, but I didn't extend my hand, feeling reserved and awkward. I sat down, watching you talk, holding my teacup and sipping gently. I thought: It's good that you let me watch your life like this. I'm not afraid of the apparent distance. Just sitting next to you, being called "Xiao Su" by them, is enough to move me. You're different from other men in my life, truly different. At the table, you were pulled to sit at the head of the table. I didn't know what to do. You said, "I want to sit next to Xiao Su."... So, I moved to sit next to you... Everything was unspoken, yet perfectly clear. Toasting was an essential part of the etiquette. I was protected by you, and a little bit of alcohol touched my lips, making my face flush. After a few rounds of drinks, you said, "To be honest, Xiao Su and I have a special relationship..." Several people, holding their glasses, nodded in agreement: "We can see that, we can see that, otherwise we wouldn't be sitting here..." I nervously touched your leg, afraid you'd say something you'd regret. My face turned even redder. I may have had two men at the same time, but the other was definitely behind the scenes. However, you made me certain that my happiness could be laid bare. I was open, honest, at peace, and content to have two men, who doted on me so much—one indulging my inner desires, the other openly proclaiming it to the world... My life expanded because of this. I'd never felt like I belonged to anyone before, but at that moment, I felt I belonged to you, to him, I was your woman. When toasting, you became slightly more unrestrained, leaning against me, and we shared two consecutive French kisses... Your tongue darted in and out. You made me feel even more at ease. Your acceptance of me was so complete that I couldn't find a gap. Perhaps it was their turn to be stunned. 3. After the meal, they teased us as they escorted us to the elevator. We didn't want to say a word in the elevator, so we just kissed. After a long while, we realized the elevator was still on the second floor. I smiled sheepishly and quickly pressed the button for our floor, wondering: if they, also waiting for the elevator, saw that our elevator hadn't moved for so long, would they cover their mouths and laugh? 4. In the room. You sat down, and I leaned against you, and we embraced. "I'm always afraid I'll fall in love with you, and you'll fall in love with me… What if I want to see you every day?" I also want to see you, every day. You gripped my shoulders tightly, shaking me, my body feeling like it was about to fall apart. It was the first time I'd seen you so domineering and rough, every bone bursting with possessive power. I love you like this. So I obediently lowered myself, kneeling between your legs, burying my head in your stomach, my cheek gently brushing against you, sometimes burying my whole face in your skin, breathing in your scent, kissing you deeply, without any choice… "Take it off!""Strip naked!" Yes, the desire to be naked, like the body, is more real. I saw you throw the clothes off the bed and impatiently press down on me. Like two fleshy magnets, snapping together perfectly. My voice was initially suppressed, always thinking about the embarrassment of someone knocking on the wall to remind me... But you're naughty. Someone kept sending you messages, so you simply made a phone call, put the phone aside, and forcefully squeezed all the strength of my shouts from my chest... My breathing was too rapid, as if there wasn't enough air. When we kissed, I realized that too much panting had taken away the moisture in my mouth. Our tongues touched, astringent, before slowly soaking into each other, overflowing. I knew that on the other end of the phone, there was a chaotic mess of thoughts, a desire that had arisen for you, but I didn't like it. I didn't want my joyful voice to be used as a feather to flirt with others. Even though you said: it's just to add some spice... Hmm, is that what I wrote in "Jealousy as Flirting"? I thrust my hips forward to meet you, trembling uncontrollably, wanting to go deeper and deeper. For many moments, I forgot everything, even you… I needed my vision to return, to awaken. You, through your body, propelled my soul away, sending it drifting far, like clouds encountering the wind. I didn't know where to place this pure joy, so I drifted into a dream of splendor… As I fell from the dream, I saw you. The phone call ended, I don't know when. I think our voices, resonating on the same frequency, our passionate cries, must have pushed others far away. No one wanted, no one had the confidence to find a crack in our souls and bodies. We were a unified whole, inseparable, weren't we? 5 I rolled over… In my ecstasy, I didn't even remember being languid, passive, and powerless. Your hands gripped my chest, your waist and hips beginning to exert an indescribable strength. Like a whirlwind, you swept my emotions around like leaves, and I danced and tumbled on your body. The world has gone mad, lost all order. We are upside down in this chaotic world, colliding with each other without boundaries. Obeying your will, I willingly obey, or release myself. Never before have I called any man "husband," never before have I broken free from my inner shyness to utter the word "father," not even a flicker of love has ever crossed my mind… all of it surges forth at once! You disrupted me, made me lose my inhibitions, made me an independent being enjoying myself, made me break free from the shackles of my deepest thoughts. If I were a horse, you would be the whip lashing my body, urging me forward; if I were fireworks about to rise into the sky, you would be the exploding gunpowder; if I were a wave, you would be the hurricane; if I were a flower, you, you should be spring. You opened me up, from my body to the deepest recesses of my soul that I could never touch. What is the end of this release? Do you know? It is me collapsing helplessly against you, my lower body gushing forth a torrent of heat… so much. You marvel, you reach out with your hands to find a wet patch on the sheets. You wanted more, so I went wild on you again, spraying and ejaculating once more. If that wasn't enough, I wanted to drown you too. To let you forever drown in my ocean… and so, once more. We were already soaked, your lower abdomen glistening with moisture. A third kind of water, initially warm, then icy, mingled with you and me. Your fingers were stained, you held them to your nose… clean and odorless. We moved to the other side of the bed, you still wanted more, you wanted to explore the limits of my body. So, I repeatedly pushed myself to the peak… four or five waves crashed over you, and you were submerged again. We got up, looking at the tattered bed, our fingers touching it, cool and wet, the sheets soaked through, the water-stained patterns on the mattress visible. “Are you alright?” “Very good, very good.” You hugged me, pulled the blanket up, and lay down again. 6 I know what you're going to ask. I can tell you, I've never felt this way before, never this much. You've achieved your desire to possess me. Although we're still jealous... I read all the text messages she sent you, I insisted on deleting them... I pinched and threatened, ha, just to inflate my possessiveness. You also took my phone and deleted the numbers I'd kept for years, the ones I couldn't bear to throw away. But you said you'd let me see him, and you pressed me on what to do if I saw him... I said I'd drink, get him drunk... You said: No, you can't talk to him, you have to sit next to me... Ha, we're like two children, aren't we? Cleverly expressing our love to each other? You and I are too greedy. For the past ten days or so, we've seen each other almost every day, and almost every time we see each other, we can't help but... Talk a lot, make love a lot. Physically exhausted, mentally ecstatic. You want more. You want me until my body is dry and withered, with no strength left to bear it. You said: Are you satisfied now? I sat obediently between your legs, lowered my body, lay down, my cheek caressing your belly, my hands playfully stroking your fur, sometimes giving you a quick kiss. We talked and talked, without stopping, letting time slip by, still unwilling to say goodbye. 7 You said you wanted to read my novel with me, to exchange ideas. I can imagine it under a warm, orange light, us leaning against each other quietly, my head in your arms, reading word by word with you, you wrapping your arms around my neck as you turn the pages, occasionally planting a kiss on my forehead… I would hold you, my fingers gently stroking your chest, perhaps playfully reaching down to touch it? Ah… no, I can't do that, I'm afraid we'll go crazy again… Let's get dressed and snuggle together… but what if we take off some clothes after reading a few pages? Ah, when I'm with you, my thoughts are always a bit more playful, my mind can't be too pure, what should I do? You'll help me keep things in check, right? Or are you even more restless than I am? Ah, I long for that romantic day to arrive. 8 Finally, we had to part. You snatched the phone from me, talking to Xu, so warm and friendly. And I, this woman, found the greatest happiness in that. In the car, my left hand gently, yet with a hint of apology, stroked Xu's ear, while my right hand held yours, sometimes forcefully, sometimes tenderly… love so full and heavy. After dropping you off at home, I spoke softly with Xu, our voices warm and tender in the darkness. Love held no trace of jealousy in him; his generosity made me want only to hold him and confide in him. The subtle sensation of your intrusion still lingers in my body, from yesterday until now, which is why I woke up early this morning, unable to sleep… the feeling of love reborn. Do you know?

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My happiness is going wild again because of you... (repost)

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