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Blogger:admin 2023-03-23

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Was the teacher drunk? 

I'm a somewhat introverted girl. I firmly believe that what I fear most is loneliness. This year I'm a sophomore, and it wasn't until Mr. Zhang appeared that I began to emerge from my inner solitude. Mr. Zhang is ten years older than me. He wears glasses on his angular face, and every word he speaks makes me feel that he is a learned and steady man. It was Mr. Zhang who made me experience the joy of learning, and it was also he who gave me the most painful tears.


It was the second Sunday of the semester. I was still alone in my dormitory, staring at the ceiling. Actually, I had long been used to this kind of day, but for some reason, my heart still felt sore and sad. Just as my thoughts were sinking, there was a knock at the door. I thought it was my classmate Juan coming back to keep me company. I quickly jumped out of bed and ran to open the door.


"Liu Yao, you... quickly put on your clothes," Mr. Zhang said hurriedly, turning around.


I saw it was Mr. Zhang. I quickly closed the door and covered myself completely with my clothes. I got dressed, blushing, and opened the door. Mr. Zhang was still facing away from the door, carrying two boxes of fast food. Hearing the door open, he turned around and said to me, "Liu Yao, I heard from your classmates that you often stay in the dormitory alone and don't eat breakfast. That won't do! Come on, I got two meals, let's eat together." Looking at Mr. Zhang's natural and easygoing expression, my heart warmed instantly. Tears welled up in my eyes. From that moment on, the barrier between teacher and student was broken down by Mr. Zhang's care and concern for me. We became close friends who could talk about anything.


This year's summer camp was organized by Mr. Zhang. Perhaps because of my personality, I don't like overly noisy places. But I still went this time because I knew that Mr. Zhang and his wife were having problems and had been separated for more than two months. Mr. Zhang had even shed tears in front of me because of this. So, in my heart, the purpose of going to summer camp with the students this time wasn't to play, but to care for him the way he had cared for me.


That night at summer camp, everyone had a great time. Mr. Zhang sang and drank, downing one glass after another. The students all thought Mr. Zhang was happy, but I knew he was drowning his sorrows in alcohol.


Perhaps because Mr. Zhang doesn't usually drink, he would go to the side to vomit after every few drinks. At first, it was okay, but later he was unsteady on his feet. I went over to persuade him to stop drinking, but he kept drinking and staggering to the side to vomit. I helped Mr. Zhang up and patted his back. He looked at me and said, "Liu Yao, go play with your classmates. I want to be alone over there for a while."


Just as I was about to leave, Mr. Zhang leaned heavily against me, a surge of heat like alcohol coursing through my body. I had no choice but to help him slowly walk to a quieter place. Once we were some distance from the group, Mr. Zhang said, "Liu Yao, let's sit here for a while." Mr. Zhang's body instantly went limp, like mud. Seeing his distressed expression, my heart ached, and I didn't know how to comfort him. He struggled to sit up and leaned on my shoulder; I could feel our breaths. Suddenly, Mr. Zhang forcefully pinned me down. I wanted to resist, but besides fearing the other classmates would find out, subconsciously I had already been completely conquered by him. That was my first time, the most beautiful first time of my life as a pure girl. A tearing pain swept through my entire body. Mr. Zhang straightened his clothes, suddenly becoming unusually sober, and whispered to me, "I'll go first, you can come later." Watching Mr. Zhang's cold, receding figure in the dead of night, I woke up as if from a dream, suppressing my sobs, tears streaming down my face.


Years later, when I recalled that painful night again, through various details, I discovered that Mr. Zhang wasn't drunk at all that day; he was pretending. And I was merely a substitute for him to vent his desires and frustrations. He used false tenderness and care to steal a pure girl's virginity. Every time I think of this, a wave of anger surges within me. After crying, I could only pretend to be nonchalant and return to my classmates. However, even I don't know if time can heal my wounded heart.


【over】

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