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A Deep Narrative Study of the Sexual Psychology of Participants in “***” Behavior 

As a social phenomenon, promiscuity has sparked widespread public controversy. It is a legally ambiguous concept, partially overlapping with the crime of "group sexual misconduct," meaning it operates on the fringes of the law. Simultaneously, with changing sexual attitudes in China, promiscuity has also become a challenge to traditional sexual values, involving numerous issues such as the relationship between marriage and sex, sexual attitudes and morality, and the relationship between love and sex. Existing literature focuses on two levels of research on promiscuity: first, discussions on its legal and moral aspects, primarily addressing the question of whether the crime of "group sexual misconduct" should remain in effect; second, discussions on its personal significance, mainly focusing on individual sexual rights. These discussions and controversies primarily exist in online resources, with opinions expressed by figures like Li Yinhe and Fang Gang on their Weibo accounts generating considerable social debate and backlash. Scholars such as Lin Xinyu and Huang Jiali have also provided rigorous academic analyses. However, in a sense, answering both of these questions requires a deep understanding and explanation of the psychological processes, especially the moral psychological processes, of those involved in promiscuity. This paper adopts qualitative research on this phenomenon, primarily narrative research, to depict the sexual processes of couples engaging in illicit sexual behavior before, during, and after intercourse, aiming to provide an empirical basis for research on illicit sexual ethics.
1. Research Subjects and Methods
1.1 Research Methods
This study adopts the narrative research method. Narrative research is a method that presents facts and provides academic interpretation. Its characteristic is the ability to depict, interpret, and analyze real-world events. The research subject is the complete individual, not a single element of their being.
1.2 Research Subjects, Location, and Researchers
This study contacted seven couples (including two couples engaging in illicit sexual behavior as lovers) in a third-tier city in Shandong Province through certain channels. To ensure they could speak freely, we arranged to meet in two small conference rooms in a local hotel. The two researchers in this study are senior psychological counselors, skilled in using techniques to help clients relax and speak freely, and adept at using psychological probing techniques to clarify issues. They possess the high level of communication skills required for narrative research. Some researchers have pointed out that "narrative research requires researchers to possess strong practical wisdom. Researchers must use generative thinking to closely observe changes in the situation and keenly perceive the deeper meanings implied in the research subjects' words in order to uncover what is hidden deep within them." The professional abilities of psychological counselors are well-suited to the needs of this type of narrative research. Furthermore, they interview the same-sex partner of each couple in real-life roles (i.e., as a married couple), with each couple undergoing 8-12 hours of psychological interviews conducted by two researchers. At the beginning of the interviews, it is explained that the research is for scientific purposes only, with no right or wrong answers, and a confidentiality agreement is signed. During the interviews, apart from necessary clarifications and pre-planned questions, the principle of "client-centered" counseling is upheld, with no moral judgments or leading questions. The interview ends according to the interviewee's wishes.
1.3 Research Tools and Related Concepts
In this research, our research perspective is psychological, influenced by theories in the field of social cognition. We define the theoretical scope used in our research as follows:
The territoriality of social cognition: The territoriality of social cognition is a research approach in moral psychology advocated by moral psychologist Elliot Turiel in the late 1980s and early 1990s. Its core idea is that individuals have their own specific cognitive processes regarding which issues belong to the moral domain. Its characteristics include rule invariance, rule consistency, and rule universality, involving three basic themes: harm, rights, and justice. Individuals' cognition regarding which issues belong to the social normative domain also has certain characteristics. That is, individuals believe that if a certain type of issue is entirely determined by social authority, then the issue does not belong to the moral domain but to the social normative domain. Similarly, if a certain type of issue should be decided by oneself, then it belongs to the personal domain. Thus, individual cognition can be divided into moral domain cognition, social normative domain cognition, and personal domain cognition. Different cognitions have different effects on individual behavior, and the accompanying feelings also differ. Individuals who believe that an event belongs to the moral domain are more willing to engage in that behavior and experience positive feelings; violating the rule will produce negative feelings. Individuals are less likely to experience moral feelings when faced with routine social issues and personal problems. Furthermore, besides these three types of events, there are also instances where individuals simultaneously generate thoughts from different domains when faced with the same event; these events are categorized as mixed-domain events.
Our research hypothesis is that sexual misconduct is a mixed-domain event, and its cognition involves the above three domains of cognition. The main purpose of this narrative study is to depict how these three domains of cognition conflict or compromise in real-world situations. Based on social cognitive domain theory, this study defines sexual morality psychology as the psychological processes related to rights, justice, and harm in relation to sex.
Sexual autonomy and sexual rights: In the field of moral psychology, the cognition of autonomy and rights belongs to the moral domain of cognition. Professor Li Yinhe believes that sexual misconduct is a manifestation of individual sexual autonomy and sexual rights and should be encouraged. We will study this issue from a moral psychological perspective. If a person engages in sexual misconduct with the moral appeal of individual rights, then they will clearly believe that sexual misconduct is harmless or even beneficial. Before, during, and after sexual misconduct, while experiencing sexual feelings, they will also have a positive moral sense regarding the sexual misconduct. The study will clarify and explore the rights and autonomy that participants may possess.
Meanwhile, considering the potential correlation between sexual dysfunction and family dynamics, and sexual psychological abnormalities, we used the Nilson Marriage Quality Questionnaire and the Sexual Addiction Screening Test (SAST, developed by the International Committee on Trauma and Addiction). The former is a highly valid psychological measurement tool for marriage and family, involving eight indicators such as marital satisfaction and excessive idealization, with a validity of 0.75-0.8. The latter can characterize the subject's position within the dimensions of those seeking treatment for sexual addiction and the general population, i.e., it can detect whether their sexual problems are closer to those of the general population or those of those with sexual addiction (the results are divided into high, medium, and low, with high representing those with sexual addiction, medium representing those between those with sexual addiction and the general population, and low representing those of the general population). In addition, we also included the following pre-set question: 1. "Of the following three statements about educating children, which would you be more inclined to say to your child: A. Sex is wonderful and should be enjoyed; B. Sex is powerful and should be controlled; C. Sex is dirty and should be avoided." The purpose of this question is to project their basic views on sex onto their own children. 2. "It is said that in other regions and countries, *** can be carried out as long as everyone agrees. Do you think that their actions are: A. Very wrong; B. Somewhat wrong; C. Unclear; D. Somewhat right; E. Very right? Why do you think so?" The purpose of the second pre-set question is to explore whether the rationality of *** behavior is universal.
2 Research Content and Results
Given the small sample size, the data statistics lack the necessary reliability. Therefore, the researchers in this paper use the data more as a tool to analyze psychological problems, reducing its statistical significance. Combining the audio materials, data, and the common opinions of the two psychological counselors, we summarize the research results as follows:
2.1 Two contradictions were reflected in the study
. From the analysis of the audio and text materials, two obvious contradictions exist in the study:
First, there is a contradiction between the self-reported marital happiness and the results of in-depth interviews.
When visitors evaluated the marital relationships in their online dating group, they all held the view that "the couples in this group all have very good relationships." During the initial interviews, 6 out of 7 couples shared this assessment (in the remaining couple, the wife believed their relationship had significant problems, while also expressing love despite the issues). However, as the interviewees clarified, all but one of the 6 couples admitted to experiencing difficulties and conflicts in their relationship. During the interviews, we also had them complete a family quality questionnaire via computer. Analysis of the questionnaire results revealed some of the reasons for these conflicts. The results showed that respondents consistently scored highly on the "over-idealization" dimension. This indicates that they view their marriages in an idealized way. High idealization is common among newlyweds; even before engaging in actual married life, they believe their union is suitable and wonderful. For couples married for many years, a high level of idealization may precisely indicate underlying problems in their marriage, which they are unable or unsure how to address, thus resorting to idealism to deceive themselves and maintain the strength of their marriage. Therefore, the slogans commonly promoted in QQ groups such as "sexual intercourse is beneficial to maintaining marital relationships" and "the couples in the group all have good marital relationships" are nonsense and idealistic expressions.
Secondly, there is a contradiction between the self-reported understanding of sexual autonomy and rights and the feelings during and after sexual intercourse.
Of the 14 interviewees, they all expressed that "everyone agrees, it doesn't harm anyone, it's not a moral issue but a matter of personal rights." Except for two, everyone else affirmed that they experienced positive feelings during sexual intercourse. So, are these positive feelings a sense of autonomy and rights? After further clarification, we discovered some contradictions. Generally speaking, a sense of moral rights and autonomy is a feeling experienced when an individual's self-awareness is strong; that is, an individual can only understand the difference between themselves and others when the boundaries between themselves and others are clear, and thus define their own rights and autonomy. However, during sexual intercourse, we heard statements such as "Since everyone has taken their clothes off, what's there to worry about?" and "In that situation, everyone is hot-headed and doesn't think about anything." These statements remind us that their positive emotions stem from a loss of self-awareness. When people lose their sense of self, their self-evaluation weakens, and negative self-evaluation also decreases. Therefore, they can experience positive feelings. This psychological mechanism is involved in phenomena such as "fan riots in stadiums," meditation, and even artistic creation. Of course, the former is related to morality, while the latter two are not. It is clear that what they felt was not sexual autonomy and rights. Furthermore, the proportion of positive feelings decreased significantly after the incident, with only 3 respondents reporting positive feelings. Further clarification revealed that individuals felt "that's just how it is," or "I don't know why it changed," a feeling of powerlessness resulting from a decreased sense of control under the influence of group consciousness, rather than a sense of autonomy. The other 3 respondents who reported positive feelings interpreted these feelings as sexual satisfaction and relaxation, a sense of accomplishment, and a sense of autonomy, respectively. In other words, only 1 out of 14 respondents experienced sexual autonomy. Therefore, it can be summarized that the positive feelings during the act of masturbation come from group influence, while the negative feelings afterward stem from the sense of powerlessness following a loss of control. Neither is morally relevant. Equating the positive feelings generated during masturbation with sexual autonomy and awareness of sexual rights is biased, hence Professor Li Yinhe's argument is somewhat arbitrary. From the perspective of social cognitive theory, we can also explain why most masturbators in the study viewed the behavior as a personal problem before masturbation, unrelated to the moral definition of individual rights. During masturbation, they experienced a partial loss of self-awareness due to group influence, and subsequently realized that this personal problem contained self-harm, leading to a decrease in their sense of control and a sense of powerlessness. Thus, they viewed masturbation as a mixed issue involving harm (human cognitive balancing mechanisms prevented them from acknowledging this harm, only manifesting as a sense of powerlessness) and the personal realm.
2.2 Findings on Other Sexual Psychological Issues:
First, for those who engage in prostitution, can sex and love be separated?
The academic discussion of this question stems from E.O. Laumann's concept of "sex must be based on love," which, in real life, romantics give a secular expression: "All sexual behavior not based on love is immoral." Research results also show a certain degree of inseparability. For women, this inseparability of love and sex is very evident. For example, in one couple, the wife insisted on being in the same room as her husband during intercourse and wanted to see his reaction. Another couple had a rule: "Sex is allowed, but kissing and touching are not." Even the couple in a romantic relationship expressed that "doing this isn't easy; thinking about him (the lover) with someone else makes me feel sad, but I quickly forget about it because of the sexual stimulation," and that "this (prostitution) is like blind dating; finding someone suitable is not easy," etc. However, while similar expressions are less common among men, most men mentioned that they didn't feel good with prostitutes and preferred to have relations with their wives or lovers.
Secondly, can sex and marriage be separated for those who engage in prostitution?
We investigated the issues of having lovers and engaging in prostitution, asking participants to rate the degree of error they considered these issues (on a 5-point scale, from very wrong to very right) and their reasons, under two scenarios: with the other party's tacit consent or without their knowledge. The results showed that tacit consent was a significant variable in both cases (f=4.25, p<0.01). This means that within a family, sex and marriage can be separated as long as the other party consents. This result provides a partial explanation for their participation in prostitution. However, in-depth interviews also revealed that this separation of sex and marriage is often based on a helpless choice stemming from reality. Phrases like "This kind of thing is commonplace in society now" and "Can't the husband and wife satisfy each other?" cannot be simply concluded as an awakening, development, or even liberation of sexual rights.
Thirdly, does prostitution violate the obligation of marital fidelity?
Mutual fidelity between spouses is a marital obligation and a major component of sexual morality. Prostitution, in a general sense, is a violation of mutual fidelity between spouses. However, all the visitors expressed the view that "everyone agrees this isn't betrayal." To verify whether this view was true, we primarily clarified whether the perpetrator experienced any moral repercussions. Interviews revealed that four of the female visitors felt shame, but this shame stemmed from vicarious shame at the possibility that their parents or children might find out and feel ashamed; they did not feel shame towards their husbands or wives. This indicates that, neither these four women nor others considered adultery a violation of the marital obligation of fidelity.
Fourth, why is imagining one's wife (or husband) having sex with someone else the most stimulating aspect for the perpetrator?
In interviews, six male and three female participants expressed that the most stimulating part of a sexual relationship, whether sexually explicit or involving multiple partners, was not actually having sex with a third party, but rather imagining or watching their spouse have sex with someone else. This passion could even last for a period after the act ended, serving as a source of passion for their marital sex life. How can we analyze this psychological experience? First, since both parties consent, they are no longer concerned about infidelity and can trust each other in their sexual relationship. Therefore, they can be their true selves at this point. Their true needs are not to have sex with a third party, but to imagine or watch their spouse have sex with another man—a result that may differ greatly from common expectations. We analyze two reasons for this: First, breaking taboos brings a strange sense of pleasure, and watching one's spouse have sex with someone else can bring this pleasure (because having sex with someone else is a major taboo for most people). Second, watching or recalling one's spouse having sex with someone else during or after sex can bring pleasure, stimulating a collective self, that is, stimulating the indulgence and stimulation of "losing oneself," thus achieving the most primal experience of sexual indulgence. Then, cognitively, it is seen as a source of passion for more harmonious sexual relationships, which explains why masturbation enthusiasts need to seek more masturbation experiences, more intense and wilder sexual experiences. At the same time, this, to some extent, negates the idea that masturbation is an expression of individual sexual rights and autonomy. Rather than an expression of sexual rights, it is more like abandoning or even indulging oneself, escaping or abandoning any moral cognition involved, and thus actively giving up sexual rights and autonomy. True sexual rights and autonomy should be enjoyable and pleasurable for both parties, not just simple stimulation or even loss of control.
Fifth, why do some masturbators like to identify themselves as "insiders"? All
12 interviewees used the term "insider," saying things like, "She (his wife) can have sex with someone in the circle, but she cannot accept having sex with someone she doesn't know outside the circle," and "In our circle, everyone thinks this way," etc. Being an "insider" is a form of identity, implying some implicit group norms set by the masturbation community. These norms are that "insiders are just here to have fun," and no real feelings will develop. The main perpetrator in the Nanjing massacre once said in the media, "This is just playing around. If you can't handle it, don't play. Don't let it affect your marriage." We can see from this that perpetrators use group norms to restrain others and protect themselves, but they cannot bear the consequences of the natural connection between sex and love—that is, a husband or wife developing feelings for a third party, thus harming the marriage. The complete separation of sex and love is against human nature. The statements of those within the group show that they are using the power of the group to deceive themselves and indulge themselves under the guise of "playing around." This is not the behavior of a mature and responsible adult. According to moral psychologist Kohlberg, this is a manifestation of the second level, third stage (the social and legal orientation stage, where "society" refers to their small community), not yet reaching the third level of ethical orientation (oriented towards ethical principles of justice, care, and even rights). It can be concluded that people holding this view do not engage in promiscuous behavior based on sexual autonomy and sexual rights.
Sixth, why do perpetrators use bottom-line ethical requirements to balance cognitive dissonance?
When faced with promiscuous behavior, perpetrators exhibit emotional reactions such as conformity (mainly referring to their group of spouses), curiosity, and a pursuit of stimulation. At the same time, some clients have expressed strong feelings of shame. However, this sense of shame stems from the fact that one's behavior does not conform to social standards and general views. "The prevailing social view is that adultery violates marital fidelity, and one feels scorned by others and society." This shame is a moral feeling, but in a society where the public largely uses basic ethical standards as the benchmark for behavior, this moral feeling is balanced by these basic ethical standards. "Everyone involved agrees, and no one is harmed," and since members of adultery QQ groups currently have their own pseudonyms and do not reveal their real names, the sense of shame is dissipated when it is unknown to outsiders.
2.3 Categorical Analysis of Adultery Groups Based on Moral Cognition
In our research, we adhered to the principles of narrative research. After the interviews, through repeated readings of the recordings or notes, we attempted to categorize individuals based on different levels of sexual moral cognition. This allows us to better grasp the characteristics of adultery groups, but the proportion of different categories needs to be determined through large-scale surveys.
The first category can be called adultery advocates.
Three interviewees can be classified into this category. The term "ism" indicates that such individuals fully and positively affirm the meaning and value of group sex, viewing it as a kind of "belief and value," beyond question, firmly believing in its value, and frequently engaging in or encouraging others to participate in such behavior. These individuals often become core figures in a group sex organization, emotionally influencing and cognitively persuading participants, and enjoying group sex involving multiple people simultaneously. They view the sexual pleasure derived from multiple sexual stimuli as an expression of individual sexual rights and autonomy. Regarding potential legal issues, they believe relevant legal provisions are inappropriate, considering group sex a normal and healthy expression of human sexual behavior. Therefore, during interviews, some interviewees said, "There's nothing wrong with it; it helps the family" (meaning it solves their sexual problems while maintaining family integrity). If group sex advocates are punished by law, they may compromise in their actions, but at the ideological level, they may not fully understand the potential harm of group sex, making them the most stubborn among them.
Why do *** advocates exist? The interview results show that the three interviewees in similar situations share the following characteristics: First, they enjoy sex and have extremely strong sexual desires; second, they believe sex is extremely beautiful and are blind to its potential negative consequences. When asked how they would teach their children about sex, they all chose "Sex is beautiful, learn to enjoy it" as their first choice, while others chose "Sex is powerful, learn to control it" as their first choice. When distinguishing between pedophilia, incest, homosexuality, having affairs, prostitution, soliciting, and premarital sex as moral issues, they believed only pedophilia was a moral issue, and the others were not. Third, they generally have a weak sense of family, believing that marriage and sex are separate, and often have long-term affairs without feeling ashamed, even believing it helps maintain family integrity. Therefore, their excessive emphasis on sex and the separation of marriage and sex have led to their firm belief in *** behavior.
On the surface, "sexual supremacists" fit the profile of the "post-marriage era" proposed by Zhao Hejun, a Chinese scholar of sexual rights and sexual law. This era is guided by Locke's view that "the individual body belongs to oneself" and that sexual existence is a fundamental aspect of human existence. It holds that "the task of public authorities is to punish all forced, abusive, and abusive sex, and to protect all consensual sex." In this post-marriage era, marriage has almost no meaning for sex. The three characteristics we analyzed above coincide with those of people in the post-marriage era. However, during the interviews, the "sour feeling of sharing good things" suggests that sexual existence cannot coexist harmoniously with other aspects of the self. Their high scores on sex addiction questionnaires also indicate that their sexual existence is somewhat "out of control." Therefore, psychologically speaking, rather than being fighters for sexual rights, they are more accurately described as people who cannot experience a happy married life and thus use sex merely as a means of self-expression. The privacy of sex makes this self-expression walk a tightrope, bringing intense stimulation as well as a strong sense of self-existence.
The second type can be called "ignorant sensualists."
Nine of the interviewees fall into this category. This group is characterized by: First, a relatively strong sex drive, but an awareness of the potential harm of sex. When judging issues involving sex, such as pedophilia, they generally consider pedophilia, incest, and having affairs to be morally problematic. Second, however, they lack clear sexual and family ethics, and therefore do not reflect on the meaning and value of sexual acts. They often measure sexual acts by basic moral standards, believing that "everyone agrees, and no one else is harmed." In the specific process of sexual acts, based on that "field," individuals lose their individuality or self-awareness, becoming like "a monster with many heads," as described by Le Bon in *The Crowd*. They use group consciousness to replace self-awareness, "unable to think much," lost in sexual pleasure and frenzy. From this perspective, sexual acts are harmful to the "rational existence" that makes a person human. This substitution of group consciousness also hinders their cognitive growth to some extent, leading to the unconditional acceptance of sexual ideology.
Generally, they are unaware that this behavior is linked to the legal charge of "group sex." If they were aware, facing legal sanctions would prompt them to rethink the relationship between family, love, and sex, thereby fostering their growth in sexual morality.
The third type is the combination of a passive wife and a persistent husband.
In our interviews, four women participated passively, but "passive" does not equate to "forced." They do not approve of this behavior. Regarding sexual understanding, they believe that "sex is a matter between one's family and husband, and should not be made public." In terms of sexual morality, they reject all non-consensual, unfaithful, or even monetaryly motivated sexual acts. The act of prostitution also made them "feel bad" and "feel somewhat disgusted afterward." But why did they engage in this behavior? The interviews revealed that they often experienced various conflicts with their husbands in their daily lives, creating a strong motivation to resolve this marital maladjustment. Meanwhile, regardless of their reasons (resisting their wives' potential control, seeking stimulation, or relieving stress), their husbands all have the subjective desire to actively seduce their wives. They employ certain procedures (watching porn, browsing adult groups, inducing imagined third parties to join, the third party actually joining, and sexual intercourse), and use persistent persuasion to gradually entice their wives to consent (sometimes taking 1-2 years). These participants passively consent to meet their husbands' needs and often experience negative feelings during sexual activity. Some women resolutely refuse a second time, but some interviewees also mentioned the benefits of masturbation, such as the intimacy created by sharing a secret not accepted by society, and the greater freedom and openness in subsequent sexual encounters. Seeing their husbands' satisfied reactions afterwards led to cognitive adjustments, resulting in a second and third time. They acknowledged the stimulation and excitement of masturbation, even its positive impact on the marital relationship. However, they still felt emotionally uncomfortable afterward, experiencing negative feelings. In the interviews, we clarified these negative feelings as "shame," "doing something sneaky, not being able to do it openly." Compared to those who advocate masturbation, they did not reach the fifth stage of the psychological process of masturbation proposed by Jenks in 1985: the "rationalization stage."
These participants sacrificed sexual morality for other reasons, exhibiting a self-sacrificing characteristic. But why sacrifice sexual morality rather than other considerations? The reason is often related to their husbands' wishes. Their husbands generally have strong sexual desires and often use sexual means to achieve their goals, such as seeking stimulation, resisting their wives' potential control, or compensating for the frustration caused by their wives' difficulty in achieving orgasm. Therefore, the self-sacrificing wife and the persistent husband together constitute a typical combination of perpetrators of sexual misconduct. While this is relatively typical in our small sample, its proportion in a larger sample requires further investigation.
3. Discussion and Reflection
During the interviews, we strongly felt that sexual issues cannot be addressed by simply returning to the act of sex itself, thus failing to discuss sexual rights and autonomy. On the one hand, the perpetrators in our study had many needs beyond sexual behavior: using sex to release stress, to retaliate against their wives' potential control, and to engage in non-individualized expression. Therefore, their sexual autonomy is not true sexual autonomy. Only someone with sound sexual psychology, free from various psychological problems, can truly discuss sexual autonomy and sexual rights. However, we rarely observed this in the interviews. On the other hand, sex is a subjective experience and also possesses an intersubjective nature, meaning that sexual feelings are related to the person with whom the sexual relationship takes place and the circumstances surrounding the sexual relationship. It involves not only the act of sexual intercourse itself but also love and intimacy, emotional expression, ethics, and social interaction. Giddens also proposed the concept of "malleability" to express a similar meaning. However, in the process of sexual intercourse, sex is reduced to the act of sexual intercourse itself, while simultaneously rejecting any emotional connection between one's spouse and others. One interviewee said, "Seeing her serve him food made me feel uncomfortable," and "We agreed to exchange sexual partners but not kiss," because she had developed an emotional connection with him. In this way, the subject's original constructed sexual experience (the construct of sexual behavior, love, intimacy, etc.) is forcibly severed in this situation. This, in a sense, "rapes" one's autonomy and rights. Sacrificing one's autonomy and rights in exchange for sexual autonomy and rights is undoubtedly a form of alienation and deviation.
Why sacrifice one's autonomy for sexual autonomy? I believe that the sex education of sexual intercourse participants is seriously flawed, leading to their subjective and unscientific views and opinions on sex. Currently, international sex education generally exists at three levels. The highest level is sexual rights and sexual character, followed by sexual mental health, and then sexual safety. Sexual safety is the basic education, but countries like Sweden and the United States have moved beyond sexual physiological safety education to include sexual character education (educating teenagers on the correct understanding of the role of sex in love and marriage, the importance of a good relationship for a fulfilling sex life, and gender equality in sexual matters, based on sex science knowledge). Our survey results show that, except for one couple, none of the other respondents received comprehensive premarital sex education, and even this one couple only received basic safety-related sex education. The privacy and confidentiality of sex led them to learn about sex on their own, without finding the right approach, relying heavily on pornography. The group sex and partner swapping depicted in pornography broadened their horizons, and online pornographic groups provided a platform for them to translate these behaviors into reality. While these media outlets are not lacking in technique or stimulation, they lack the most crucial element of sex education: understanding the role of sex in marriage and in adult life. The exaggerated portrayals in adult films leave an imprint on their blank slates of sexual morality, making them more susceptible to the "brainwashing" in online adult entertainment groups. Therefore, they cognitively accept the idea that "adultery is beneficial," but as the research shows, they reveal their true thoughts and feelings emotionally. Society should strengthen sex education for teenagers and improve its quality. This can help individuals establish a complete, healthy sexual self, so that they don't have to sacrifice their integrity to achieve sexual rights and autonomy. The "empowerment-based sex education" proposed by Chinese scholars Fang Gang, and the "self-actualization-based sex education" proposed by Shangguan Fangfang and Li Su, are explorations and efforts in this direction.
Furthermore, why is adultery so persistent?
During the interviews, only one of the five couples had a good relationship; the others had various marital problems, and the other two couples were involved in this behavior as lovers, with their marriages existing in name only. Unable to resolve family conflicts and contradictions, and without seeking help through marriage counseling or other relevant channels, they resort to psychological defense mechanisms such as avoidance, neglect, and rationalization to cope with marital problems. In the virtual communication environment of the internet, anonymity and group behavior make such behavior relatively safe, making the use of online platforms to resolve or mitigate their marital issues seem somewhat logical. Marriage and family therapist Huang Weiren once said that a good marital relationship has a healing effect and a self-improvement function. Therefore, strengthening education on marital relationships and providing professional assistance at the societal level is an urgent matter.
In conclusion, sex and its underlying moral and psychological manifestations reflect certain social, marital, family, and sexual psychological issues from a certain perspective. Behind seemingly exaggerated behavior lies a lack of sex education for children in our society. Individuals fail to establish sound and firm sexual values before adulthood, their sexual selves are fragile, and they are highly susceptible to the influence of pornography and negative online ideologies, thus using sex as a means of self-expression and to compensate for other problems. It also reflects a lack of marital and family education and counseling in society. Individuals cannot obtain help through professional channels and thus seek "folk remedies" to cure family problems. Therefore, both of these issues are social problems worthy of attention and require multifaceted efforts beyond the law to promote the construction of a society's sexual and ethical civilization. This will be a long and arduous systematic project.
Furthermore, it is undeniable that human sexual awareness and sexual rights are a gradual process of development. We do not deny and even welcome this trend, but the research results remind us that, for most people involved in sex, it is premature to label their behavior as "sexual rights." Of course, this gap between the psychological reality and the ethical ideal tells us that the development of sexual rights and moral awareness still has a long way to go.

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