Filial Piety of the Wife (Part 14)

Chapter 14 Life
Life has no fixed pattern, just like the formation of morality over thousands of years. From cannibalism to clothing to cover one's ugliness, to the Three Obediences and Four Virtues, to women's liberation, it's not a complete overhaul, but rather a development. Is our development in line with the trend of the times? We don't know.
Thoughts are unrestrained, so one can think of anything.
The ringing of the phone and my father's surprised voice broke the atmosphere at home. Li Li and I immediately sensed something was wrong and got up to hear what was happening on the other end.
I also went out to hear what was going on; it seemed someone was sick.
After finishing the call, my father called out to me as he came out of the bedroom.
He was very excited when he saw me, still not calm, and said, "Your Uncle Li is sick. Come with me to see him."
Seeing my father so excited, even his steps were trembling, I didn't ask any questions. I wanted to help him, but he said it wasn't necessary.
I took Li Li and the child home, and then went with my father to see Uncle Li.
Uncle Li, whom my father mentioned, was an old friend of his. They had lived together in the countryside for many years before moving to the town.
I've known Uncle Li since I was little. He's over 180cm tall, with a robust build, dark skin, and a booming voice.
He worked in the countryside with my father before moving to the city to work. So, I often went to his house with my father, or he would come to our house for meals, mainly to drink and chat with my father.
He was my father's best friend.
Arriving at the hospital and seeing Uncle Li lying in the hospital bed shocked my father and me. His once robust physique was now emaciated, his face pale, and he had no energy at all.
He had just fallen asleep. Uncle Li's wife, Aunt Wang, saw us and, after asking us to sit down, her already red eyes welled up with tears again.
She told us what had happened. Some time ago, Uncle Li had felt chest tightness and shortness of breath. He thought it was nothing, but it got worse and worse. He didn't want to go to the hospital for a checkup, afraid of wasting money. But when he went to the clinic, the doctor said he should come to the hospital immediately. It turned out to be late-stage lung cancer.
My father kept looking at Uncle Li's face, his eyes reddening.
Aunt Wang said, "These past few years, Uncle Li has been working day and night, just like when he was young. He lives a very frugal life, never eating or dressing well, just eating what he can afford. His biggest luxury is occasionally having a few drinks with my father and the others. These past few years, he's been running a small business, always busy. Although his income is higher than before, he's never had a comfortable life, but now he's ruined his health." Aunt Wang choked up as she finished speaking.
Uncle Li woke up and saw his father. He forced a smile and said, "Old friend, you're here. It's been so long."
His father replied, "Yes, it's been less than half a year. I never thought you'd get sick. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"
Uncle Li sighed, "Ah, it's fate. I've suffered half my life, and now I've got this illness, and it's even ruined my wife and children."
Aunt Wang said, "Don't talk nonsense. Just get better." Then she left the ward.
Father said, "Old Li, don't talk nonsense or overthink things. Getting better is the most important thing."
Uncle Li coughed, "You know about this illness, right? I know too. I don't have more than a month to live. I won't suffer for too long, but I'm still worried about my wife and children."
Father said, "Just focus on getting better now. Don't think about these things. The children are working now, their lives won't be bad." Uncle
Li said, "Yes, old friend, knowing I'm about to die, I've thought about a lot of things these past few days. You and I are both unfortunate people, we've both worked so hard for so many years to make a living, and now we have this family. Our children's growth is our greatest pride. Thinking about it, we've done right by our family. Now that we're sick, it seems like we've let our family down, but the one we've let down the most is ourselves. All these years, we've worked ourselves to the bone to support our family, scrimping and saving." "I didn't live life to the fullest. Now I only have a month left before I die, and I really regret it."
My father said, "Old friend, that's how our generation all went through it. And with the happiness of our children and grandchildren, we're at peace."
Uncle Li said, "I used to think that way too, but now I feel that even if we didn't work so hard, and our wives and children might not have a slightly better life, we could spend more time with them. I could have brought my wife a bowl of hot water when she was sick, instead of working hard to earn a little money. I could have taken my wife and children for a walk every night after dinner, instead of working overtime to earn money. I could have taken my wife to see a movie, instead of having these regrets now."
As they said this, both my father and Uncle Li shed tears, and Uncle Li choked up.
This was the first time I had seen my father and Uncle Li like this. In my eyes, they had always been tall and upright, and my impression of them was always one of strength. And now, two grown men, and two elderly men at that, were crying like this.
At that moment, I felt I needed to give them space, so I left the ward and let the two good brothers have a good talk, after all, this might be a separation of life and death.
Yes, separation of life and death can happen so easily.
I thought about what Uncle Li had said earlier.
Yes, why make life so hard?
With a happy family and less work pressure, why work yourself to the bone only to end up with nothing? My father worked himself to the bone, but has he gotten the happiness he wanted? All he wanted was for his children and grandchildren to be happy, and now he should have that.
But this was for my happiness, what about his? What did he sacrifice for me? Did he live a life worthy of himself? He lacked a partner, never traveled, never had the leisure activities we have now. Although these aren't the true essence of happiness in life, they are the joys of life.
From being alone to now, if he also loses his sex life, then his life is truly unfortunate. Although I've clearly decided to resolve this issue, thinking about it now, my father's life has truly been unhappy. After
a long time, my father called me in to say goodbye to Uncle Li, I don't know if it's a final farewell or if we'll meet again.
I gave the money my father had arranged to Aunt Wang, and then left with him.
My father's eyes were red, and he remained silent on the way.
Although I didn't know how to help him relax and take things easy, I still said to him, "Dad, Uncle Li has had a hard life, yet he still has to suffer like this; it's unfair."
My father sighed.
I continued, "You and Uncle Li have worked so hard for the family all these years. What Uncle Li said earlier makes sense; you worked too hard back then and missed out on so much of life's joys. I remember once a colleague you worked with invited you and Uncle Li out for a day, but you two found odd jobs to continue earning money. Actually, our family wasn't that poor back then. And now, although you're almost retired, you can't stay idle. What you need to do now is enjoy life."
My father listened to me, but I couldn't tell if he was really listening or still thinking about Uncle Li.
I continued, "You don't need to be so frugal anymore. Wear nicer clothes and eat better. Why don't you join a tour group and go out to relax? After a while, Lili and I will take you on our days off. You should enjoy life now, don't wait until Uncle Li realizes things to change, it'll be too late then. If there's anything you want to do or anything you want to do in the future, you can tell me and Lili. We'll make sure you have a happy and fulfilling old age."
Although I was somewhat incoherent, Uncle Li's misfortune had also been a huge blow to me. After all, he was my father's best friend. There were things my father wouldn't tell me, but he would tell Li Shu. Losing a close friend would be a huge blow to someone like my father who didn't confide in others. And for me, having known Uncle Li since childhood, he was like family.
My father didn't say a word throughout the whole process.
I wanted him to come to my house for dinner, but he refused and asked me to take him home.
I took my father home, cooked him a meal, and wanted to eat with him, but he wouldn't eat and told me to leave first.
Knowing my father wanted some peace and quiet, I was worried, but there was nothing I could do. I gave him some instructions and went home.
I told Li Li about it, and she was also very saddened and worried about the blow to my father.
She wanted me to call and check on him, but thinking that he really needed some time alone, I didn't disturb him.
I went online and found that my father's diary had been updated.
"Life is unpredictable. My old friend is seriously ill and will pass away soon. Why is life so cruel?
If God has eyes, why must He inflict such a heavy blow on this poor man? Thinking back on all those years, we suffered together, sweated together, but never shed tears.
But today, we cried together.
In his final moments, he saw the meaning of life clearly. He told me to let go of my relentless work ethic and enjoy life. He told me to plan my later years carefully, to exercise, to write, to do whatever I want, to find a companion, and to remember that life is short." Don't dwell on what's for your son or grandson; now it's for yourself.
What should I do? After leaving the hospital, my son told me a lot, also encouraging me to enjoy life. But I kept thinking, life is unpredictable, how can I enjoy it? Now I have children and grandchildren, seeing them happy makes me happy. They told me to live for myself, but how can I live for myself? I was already grieving, and thinking about these things, though aimless, helped me stop thinking about the grief.
But this is self-deception. "Old friend, stay a little longer, see you a few more times."
I logged into the young couple's QQ account and found my father was online too. So I told Lili that I wanted the young couple to help persuade my father as well.
Perhaps this turn of events is a good opportunity to accelerate our efforts to persuade him, even if it's not the opportunity we want.
After my wife put the child to sleep and we washed up, my wife and I sat on the bed together, and she sent a greeting using the young couple's account.
There was no response from my father for a long time.
Yes, Dad's QQ was probably logged on automatically when he turned on the computer, and at that moment, he was probably still sadly thinking about the past.
After about ten minutes, Dad replied to the message.
He simply said hello, then went silent again.
My wife asked him what was wrong, since they had talked a lot.
Dad simply told my wife about what had happened that day.
My wife comforted him for a few words, and then the topic naturally turned to discussing life.
Although Dad wasn't in the mood to talk about sex or love, this was an opportunity.
So, when my wife told Dad to let go and enjoy life like Uncle Li and his son had suggested, she said, "We, the post-80s generation, don't think about life like our predecessors did, thinking only of the future. We enjoy life; we have more leisure spending—traveling, shopping, watching movies, even eating good food. And our openness towards sex is also a pursuit of the pleasures of life."
Of course, this last sentence was added after my wife and I discussed it, revised it, and deleted it repeatedly.
My father said that today his old friends, his son, and even we all advised him to let go and enjoy life.
He doesn't actually object to enjoying life, but how? His lifestyle is fixed; he no longer experiences dramatic highs and lows, no longer has a wild and unrestrained temperament, and no longer has many extravagant desires. Now, all he thinks about is the happiness of his children and grandchildren.
This is the kind of answer we could come up with. His lifestyle has remained unchanged for decades, and so have his beliefs.
How can we get him to let go of this, this attitude towards life that he has always held? Actually, it's not about letting go, but about making slight modifications.
We can only guide him slowly. We said, "You can start by changing your lifestyle. For example, starting tomorrow, don't just eat haphazardly."
After saying this, my father immediately said, "How do you know I often eat haphazardly?"
This startled my wife and me; we'd been exposed. After all, we hadn't discussed these things before; we're a young married couple.
However, since it wasn't in person, we thought for a moment and said, "We've talked a lot already. You live alone, and you're the kind of person who's frugal, so naturally you just eat whatever's convenient."
Father tacitly agreed, and then we continued, "Start by changing the little things in your life, and slowly you'll find many ways to feel happy. For example, you could go to a movie, go square dancing, or buy yourself that piece of clothing you've been eyeing but thought was too expensive, and so on."
My wife was really good at these things, and after all, these were things we wanted Father to do regularly, so he wouldn't always deprive himself. But what about our real purpose?
I glanced at my wife and whispered in her ear, "Should we tell Dad about your wife's seduction today?"
My wife blushed and said, "It's not appropriate to say it today. Father is in a low mood; he doesn't have the mind to think about these things."
But I said, "Today's an opportunity is rare. Why don't we be upfront with him and let him enjoy it too? Even if it bothers him, it's better than him constantly thinking about Uncle Li."
My wife said, "That's true." So I continued, "Also, for example, next time your daughter-in-law has those stunning scenes, you should appreciate them, regardless of whether you can accept that she's seducing you." After saying this, my wife trembled slightly because she was implying that she wanted her father-in-law to appreciate her body.
Although her father didn't know, my wife knew, and her husband was watching from the side. It took
her a long time to reply, saying, "I actually agree with what you, including my old friends and children, said about enjoying life. As for what we just talked about, except for the daughter-in-law thing and the sexual aspect, because he's not as open as us, he's thought about everything else."
Moreover, he felt that, just as he had wanted his children to have a good life back then, he would be happy if his children were doing well.
The child's current thinking is the same as his own back then: if he's happy, the child will be happy too.
Therefore, he's willing to change his attitude towards life starting tomorrow.
As for his daughter-in-law, he still feels it's unrealistic.
He's suppressed his sexual desires for many years. Although his recent interactions with us and his daughter-in-law's behavior have stirred these thoughts, they're unethical and illogical, and he still can't fully accept them.
Seeing that he wasn't completely opposed, we high-fived with great joy, then looked at each other shyly.
Because this meant that not being able to fully accept it meant being able to partially accept it, which meant the father was starting to accept his wife's seduction. Taking this step of accepting seduction was a significant improvement over pretending nothing had happened that day. It meant his wife's body was one step closer to being possessed by his father.
Although I experienced the sadness of Uncle Li, who seemed like family, today, I clearly felt a sensation in my genitals when my father said he couldn't fully accept it. Although it wasn't a full erection, it definitely gave me a jolt.
My wife and I probably thought similarly. Our bodies and our minds—the very act of moving in that direction is inherently a subtle form of stimulation, and yet it was all driven by her husband—creating a chaotic feeling.
Following my own thoughts, I figured my wife felt the same way. I typed a message to send to my father:
"Since you can't fully accept it, meaning you can only partially accept it, then just go with the flow, let nature take its course. When it happens again, try to appreciate it, try to relax your mind, try to awaken your long-held desires. Maybe one day, desire will overcome reason, and maybe you'll find sexual happiness."
I showed it to my wife, then held her hand and placed it on the enter key, letting her confirm before sending it.
My wife hesitated for a moment, then pressed enter.
It seems my wife and I truly understand each other.
My father hesitated for a long time before sending a message: "Actually, the biggest advantage of chatting with you is that we don't know each other and have a lot to talk about. When you said these things, I felt very conflicted. If what you said really happened, it would be unethical and against societal norms. At my age, if these things happened again, and it got out, I would be ridiculed, and how long could I live? The impact on the children is a big deal."
After reading this, we understood that my father's concerns were not only about societal norms, but more importantly, about the impact on us. It seems that my father definitely has desires, but he suppresses them. Even when faced with his most primal desires, he always considers his children's lives first. What a great father.
We said, "Life is already difficult enough. If it doesn't affect others, why worry so much about what others think? Like my husband and I, if we found someone else, the risk of it getting out would be much greater. But you are a family, living under the same roof, who would know? Do you remember the advice you gave us? For you, none of that matters."
My father replied that he really didn't feel like talking about these things today; he just didn't want to think about his dear friends anymore.
After discussing these things, although we still couldn't completely agree, we believed his attitude towards life would change. As for the extent of that change, we'd let nature take its course. However, he would try his best to avoid thinking about things that violated ethics.
We encouraged our father to think more about good things and not about life and death.
Later, we offered him a few more words of advice, told him to rest early, and then logged off.
My wife and I lay down and talked about the day's events and our conversation.
We felt that if there is a heaven, perhaps this was divine arrangement, allowing us to continue this act of filial piety.
Whether this is self-deception or not, we believe that our father's later years should be rich and fulfilling, and we will give him all the happiness we can.
I thought of a saying and sent it to him on QQ, partly for our own reflection: "
Life is short, why suffer? Enjoy life and find happiness."

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Filial Piety of the Wife (Part 14)

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