Men should understand women, and even more importantly, understand their wives. (Repost)

With the rapid development of the economy and society and the significant improvement of women's status, modern women are no longer simply housewives. They are fully involved in various social activities, and their perceptions have become more active rather than closed. Therefore, from a humanistic perspective, it is inhumane and boring for a modern woman to be dependent on only one man for her entire life, naturally leading to the existence of extramarital affairs. Extramarital affairs are alluring because they temporarily escape the strict rules and mundane troubles of marriage and family, making them seem particularly pure, joyful, and tempting. Under certain conditions (here referring to the husband's understanding), extramarital affairs do have their necessity, but they also have their own rules (here referring to the basic stability of the family).
The formation of feelings between people is the result of interaction and affection; feelings grow over time, which is precisely the point. Modern married women are sometimes more active in social activities, inevitably interacting with men. It is reasonable for them to meet, resonate, and develop feelings. The main reasons for the formation of feelings are: First, feelings grow over time. In the process of getting along, as time goes by, they understand and help each other, and feelings develop. Secondly, there's love at first sight. As people grow, influenced by their environment and friends, they subconsciously develop their own unique aesthetic standards, sketching out an ideal partner. A chance encounter can then lead to love at first sight. Thirdly, there's affection born from gratitude. Two strangers, due to some reason, one has greatly helped the other, initially a normal friendship, but later develop feelings, similar to love that grows over time. Fourthly, there's affection based on impression. Women in their work and life may genuinely admire men with unique charm, leading to feelings of attachment. Fifthly, there's affection based on sympathy and pity. Sixthly, there's rekindling of old flames. In
my wife's case, her extramarital affair with Mr. Gu was affection born from gratitude, her relationship with Mr. Seng was based on sympathy and pity, her relationships with her boss Mr. Zhang and neighbor Mr. Wang were based on impressions, her meeting her ex-boyfriend with her classmate was undoubtedly a rekindling of old flames, and her online acquaintance with Mr. Xu was pure love at first sight.
The reason modern women are drawn to extramarital affairs is that they find four kinds of happiness and joy in them. First, they enjoy romance. Women need care and affection, which husbands often neglect or fail to provide after marriage. As the marriage progresses, the romantic love that once blossomed between spouses gradually fades in the face of reality. Conversations often revolve around household chores, lacking a calm and peaceful atmosphere. Over time, the husband's shortcomings become apparent, and unsatisfactory sexual relations can lead to distress for the woman. At this time, encountering the care and affection of an extramarital affair, without the琐碎 (trivialities) of the home, allows for greater mutual understanding and careful communication. The atmosphere is peaceful and romantic, and unlike the husband, there's no constant criticism of the woman. Humans are often lacking in many ways, but they offer comforting words. For example, if a woman suddenly decides to admire the moon with her husband on a full moon night, he might say, "What's so special about the moon? Go see it yourself if you want." But at the same time, a man pursuing her outside of marriage sends a text message: "The moonlight is as beautiful as water tonight, I miss you..." Isn't this a world of difference for the woman? In short, no matter how much effort a woman puts into hoping for a surprise from her husband after marriage, the response is often indifferent. But it's different with a man outside of marriage. Even the smallest gesture will make him overjoyed, showing her meticulous care. If he adds a warm, lingering kiss and a passionate hug, how could a woman not be moved? My wife's extramarital affair with Mr. Gu is a case in point. Secondly, it allows a woman to relive the feeling of being in love. In the mundane and boring days of daily life, who else, besides an extramarital affair, can make a woman, weary of the mundane routines of life, feel like a goddess from a fairy tale again? Only an extramarital affair can give a woman the feeling of being in love. There's no talk of pots and pans. After marriage, a husband comes home from work with a cigarette in his mouth, lazily flipping through the newspaper or leisurely watching TV. At mealtimes, he might say, "Is dinner ready? I'm really hungry." An extramarital affair man would never speak in such a commanding tone. He would tenderly say, "What do you want to eat? I'll make it." Most married women juggle work and homemaking, often putting in more effort than their husbands. They all want to find joy amidst hardship and seek care and affection. Moreover, women face more temptations in life than their husbands. Any woman of beauty and taste, before or after marriage, inevitably experiences being pursued by men. Therefore, being with an extramarital affair man allows a woman to relive the feeling of romantic love. Thirdly, it's about experiencing passion. When a woman finishes washing up, puts on sexy lingerie, and tenderly sends suggestive messages to her husband, he's often indifferent and uninterested. But with an extramarital affair, he'll constantly praise her, shower her with affection, and ask about her feelings. Generally, when a family is stable, women often rely on their husbands for security and to alleviate loneliness, thus providing an excuse for extramarital affairs. She often thinks, "I really need passion and sex. I have the freedom to enjoy sex. This extramarital affair can supplement and enrich my life. I shouldn't feel guilty." In fact, women who frequently experience fresh love benefit greatly from it, both physically and mentally—something that a stable marriage cannot provide. Extramarital affairs are sometimes necessary for women. Fourthly, it satisfies vanity. Why should women abandon happiness and joy to live a clean and honest life and act cautiously? Why can't they love what they love? Besides, times have changed, and women's vanity also needs to be satisfied. Modern life doesn't have to revolve around the kitchen or the husband and family anymore. Why endure the extra time? From a practical point of view, extramarital affairs are undoubtedly a relay of happiness and joy for women.
Therefore, a true man should understand women, especially his wife. He should put himself in her shoes when he cannot have her. The common saying that a wife is one's entire possession after marriage is utter nonsense, a foolish act that harms both oneself and others, especially one's dearest loved one. A wife has more happiness and joy with the love of another man. It's better to let go than to subject her to suffering. One cannot provide a wife with lasting happiness and joy on one's own. "You have to give to receive." With the progress of the times, our thinking needs to be updated. Husbands must adapt to the modern rules of women's sexuality. The world is composed of yin and yang; living is a process of giving and receiving. Any man who understands the principles of "giving and receiving" must grasp the weight and meaning of these two words to truly be considered a man who has grasped the mysteries and secrets of life. "Giving and receiving" actually encompasses all the true wisdom of life; it is both a philosophy of life and an art of living. Giving and receiving are like water and fire, heaven and earth, yin and yang—contradictory yet unified forces, mutually generating and restraining each other, complementing each other, existing in the universe, in life, in the heart, and in subtle details. They encapsulate all the mechanisms of life's continuation. Our lives revolve around giving and receiving, achieving harmony and unity through this process. To gain, one must give. "Giving and receiving" is a spirit, an understanding, a maturity, and even more so, a wisdom and a state of being. Marriage and love are no exception. As a husband, one must give up what is necessary; without giving, harmony and happiness cannot be achieved.

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Men should understand women, and even more importantly, understand their wives. (Repost)

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