Some analyses about being cuckolded

[Exploring the causes of cuckoldry from a psychological perspective, and whether cuckoldry is a pathological or perverse condition?]
For

a long time, a question has plagued many cuckolds: "Am I a normal
person?" They desire their partners' infidelity, enjoy watching others sexually assault or manipulate their wives. In more serious cases,
this leads to prostitution, seeking out single men for threesomes, or even raising other people's children. From a conventional societal perspective,
this is hardly normal. While cuckoldry and NTR (Netorare) have a
wide global following, they are traditionally considered shameful.
Many cuckolds only dare to fantasize privately or seek out real or fabricated stories online to
satisfy their desires, rather than revealing their true thoughts to their partners. This is because, in the public eye,
cuckoldry is perhaps second only to pedophilia and incest in terms of taboo.
To discuss this issue, we must first shift our focus back to the prehistoric
era, ten to one million years ago. We all know that humans, and most animals in the world, have two most primal and instinctive
desires: appetite and sexual desire. The former ensures the survival of the individual, while the latter ensures
the survival and reproduction of the entire species. However, in the long history of human development spanning millions of years, the satisfaction of these two desires has not been natural or
easy. Due to the low level of productivity, food scarcity has been a constant throughout human history.
Even today, nearly one-third of the world's population still suffers from hunger or semi-hunger.
China's last major famine occurred less than a century ago. Even in the wealthy United States, there are widespread
poverty and inadequate clothing. In primitive times, before the development of agricultural civilization, the main
sources of food were only two: gathering and hunting. The responsibility for hunting, a crucial productive activity for the survival of the group,
naturally fell to the males.
Thus, over millions of years of evolution, human males developed characteristics distinctly different from females:
generally taller bodies, greater strength, a more adventurous mentality, and a strong competitive spirit
. Two men walking down the street, if they make eye contact for more than five seconds, will likely become hostile and possibly even fight.
This is almost impossible between two women, a remnant of this primal mentality.
In primitive hunter-gatherer societies, individual male abilities determined
the amount of food resources a man could obtain. His ability to hunt enough food determined whether women would favor him, and consequently,
the likelihood of him passing on his genes. Strong men had women, even
many, while weak men could only watch others mate and procreate. It can be said that men controlled food resources
, and women controlled reproductive resources—this was the state of affairs for a long period in primitive humanity.
This state directly led to the birth of matriarchal societies. Since women had the right to mate with whom,
they naturally had the right to reproduce for whom. When human populations developed to a certain point, and
there were no longer any prey on the ground that could threaten the survival of the human race, and food sources were no longer scarce
, women who controlled reproductive resources naturally became a group with a higher status.
In matriarchal societies, competition among men reached unprecedented levels, not only for food
but also for women. Men did not have exclusive ownership of women, while women had the freedom to choose men at will.
A woman might be having intercourse with one man one moment and immediately switch to another, easily engaging in intercourse with a dozen or more men in one night
. Why do women have far greater stamina and endurance in intercourse than men? This is
determined by women's physiological structure.
Some may know that the male genitalia have a part called the "coronal sulcus." Some scholars point out that the function of
the coronal sulcus is to scrape out the semen left by the previous male inside the woman during intercourse, increasing
the likelihood of conception with one's own semen. This part developed over a long evolutionary process.
At the same time, men have also evolved another psychological mechanism: "sexual competition." That is, when
a woman you like is having intercourse with another man, the competitive instinct stimulates a stronger sexual desire, increasing your
motivation to have intercourse and your chances of reproduction. This can be seen as a self-protective mechanism,
a hidden form of competition for men beyond the competition of who is taller, stronger, or smarter. A woman who has intercourse with other men
further stimulates a man's sexual desire—this psychology is the psychological cause of the cuckoldry complex.
Returning to the topic of human development, with the development of matriarchal societies, human productivity further increased.
The emergence of animal husbandry through the domestication of prey led to a phenomenon of "production surplus." That is, the prey hunted today
was not only enough to eat today, but could also be raised to last until tomorrow, the day after, and the year after that…and next year! Thus, humanity transitioned from primitive
communal ownership—where all prey was handed over to the communal for distribution according to need—to a period of primitive private ownership. Those with greater abilities
possessed more resources, and the gap between rich and poor appeared in the human lexicon for the first time.
At this point, a major problem of matriarchy, the "uncertainty of patriarchy" caused by intercourse with multiple men,
became increasingly severe. Since men already had sufficient ability to raise "their own" women and children, what
was the need to continue this "communal wife system"? Thus, human society entered a patriarchal society dominated by male power.
Clan surnames (the entire clan sharing one surname) evolved into patriarchal surnames (children taking only their father's surname), and women gradually became
appendages or even property of men.
Of course, this transition didn't happen overnight. I suspect that for a long time, "private wives" and
"public wives" coexisted in human society. In China, until the feudal era, Confucius proposed
Confucianism, with its emphasis on "morality and propriety," which was reinforced and developed generation after generation, finally establishing this monopolistic control of reproductive resources in the legal
sphere. At this point, women finally completely lost the right to freely choose to reproduce, and men no longer needed to worry about their
women being defiled.
However! Please don't forget that the feudal period was far too short. To ensure the "establishment of patriarchy,"
the entire human race developed a culture of male control over women, including the chastity belt and virginity complex in the West, and the Chinese practice of
drowning women in pig cages, all within a mere few thousand years. The "sexual competitive mentality" that evolved over millions of years
is indelibly etched into the genes of all human males.
And in the blink of an eye, a few thousand years have passed, and a century ago, human society entered a period of "sexual liberation."
The era of "feminism" has arrived. Women are reclaiming ownership of their wombs, and men are once again facing a tragic competitive situation
. Thus, a new war for reproduction and continuation has begun. It's undeniably a historical
cycle.
So, after all this talk, men's cuckoldry complex stems from the stress of competing with other women for women.
Do women experience the same psychology? Do women have a cuckoldry fetish? The answer is yes. According to psychological research,
women exhibit a significant "mate selection replication effect," also known as the "marriage ring effect," in romantic relationships. That is, a woman 's
level of attraction to the same man varies depending on whether he has a female partner.
Simply put, a man's marital status or relationship increases his appeal to other women
. Compared to single men, men with partners are more favored by women! Thinking about it this way,
don't all those dramatic news stories about women stealing their best friends' partners or husbands seem to have a basis in this? However, women's competitive
spirit is more reflected in "love," while men's is more reflected in "sex." Therefore, I must advise all
my female compatriots: "Beware of fire, theft, and best friends" is not just an empty phrase.
Finally, I want to say that while cuckoldry is not a psychological illness or abnormality, but
a normal psychological defense mechanism evolved in humans—every normal man feels both pain and pleasure when cheated on—
overusing this defense mechanism to stimulate sexual desire, to the point of addiction and an inability to achieve an erection without being cheated on
, can indeed lead one's life in an uncontrollable direction.
As the renowned psychologist Philip Zimbardo said, the largest sex organ in humans is the brain, and the brain's
plasticity is extremely high. Some things, once awakened, are irreversible.
Friends who hesitate and adopt a wait-and-see attitude on this path should think twice before taking that step.

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Some analyses about being cuckolded

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