Step into Gentle 12

(12)
After work, Qiming went straight to the restaurant they had arranged to meet. Du Lin and the others hadn't arrived yet. He didn't rush to order, but asked the waiter for a cup of tea and waited while drinking it. He had originally planned to meet Du Lin for a drink and a chat to relieve his frustration, but Qin Wen was with him too. Sigh...
Since having dinner with Qin Wen last time, Qiming hadn't seen her. Sometimes he thought about meeting her, but he was worried it would be awkward. Actually, now that he thought about it, it wasn't a big deal. They were all adults, and joking around occasionally wasn't a big deal. Having a crush didn't mean he had ulterior motives. But, hehe, any man would have ulterior motives towards a beautiful woman like Qin Wen!
Just as he was lost in thought, Du Lin and Qin Wen entered the restaurant. Because it was crowded, the two of them were standing at the entrance looking around. Qiming stood up and waved. They saw him and walked through a few tables to sit down.
"What brings you to dinner today?" Du Lin joked as he took off his coat.
"Don't you understand?" Qin Wen chimed in immediately, as if he'd planned it with Du Lin. "His wife's been away for almost a week, and you, his good buddy, didn't even think to come and keep him company."
"See? You call yourself my buddy?" Qi Ming laughed, pointing his finger at Du Lin's nose. "You're not as caring as Qin Wen!"
"Oh, oh, oh, so this is Qin Wen," Du Lin seized the opportunity to mock Qi Ming. "You've only known each other for a few days? Have you gone from being comrades on the same side to bed partners? Hahaha..."
Qi Ming never expected Du Lin to make such an excessive joke. He quickly gave him a wink, then looked at Qin Wen worriedly. To his surprise, Qin Wen just laughed and playfully slapped Du Lin, saying, "What? You think you've seen a live broadcast? You know everything?"
Qi Ming was truly astonished. He had thought Qin Wen would be angry, and was inwardly complaining about Du Lin's overly offensive joke. But Qin Wen not only wasn't angry, she even retorted with even more explicit language. Qi Ming wasn't unfamiliar with naturally outgoing women—simple, straightforward, and loyal, daring to say anything, and more like buddies with men. But Qin Wen didn't seem like that kind of woman at all! Besides, she was just an unmarried woman!
Was it because they were more familiar with each other than he had imagined? Or perhaps because they had studied abroad for several years and were no longer as taboo about sex as many Chinese people were? Were their views more open? Qiming couldn't figure it out.
The food was ordered quickly, and the three of them chatted while waiting for it. Qiming scolded Du Lin for not bringing He Ya along, while Du Lin said that his own wife wasn't around, yet he was always thinking about other people's wives. The two of them bickered and teased each other, while Qin Wen just watched and smiled.
"By the way, your wife's been gone for so long, how did you manage to handle it?" Du Lin suddenly asked Qi Ming with a mischievous grin, winking at Qin Wen at the same time. "Tell me, we're all adults, this is just showing you some concern, Qin Wen, don't you think? Hehe..."
"Look at that mischievous look on your face, you've made Qi Ming blush." Qin Wen initially just laughed, but after hearing Du Lin's words, he almost collapsed onto the table laughing, pointing at Du Lin with his finger as he said, "Is this your way of showing concern? It's almost perverted!"
"You guys are really something, talking about this in public like you're asking if I've eaten," Qi Ming was genuinely surprised that Du Lin would ask such a question in front of Qin Wen, his face turning red. "Personal privacy, I won't tell you! I won't satisfy your voyeuristic tendencies."
“Hehe, I knew even if you didn’t say it,” Du Lin picked up his cup and took a sip of tea, asking casually, “It’s hand washing, right?”
Qi Ming and Qin Wen looked at Du Lin with puzzled expressions, not understanding what he meant.
“Looks like you haven’t heard this joke before,” Du Lin looked around and lowered his voice, “There was a couple who jokingly referred to doing *that* as washing clothes. One day, the man wanted to do it, so he asked his son to tell his mother, ‘Dad wants to wash clothes.’ The woman, however, wasn’t feeling well for a couple of days, so she said the washing machine was broken and he should figure it out himself! A few days later, the woman was feeling better and really wanted to do it, so she also asked her son to tell his father, ‘The washing machine is fixed, we can do it now.’ But the man said, ‘No need, I already hand washed it…’”
“Hahaha…” Qi Ming and Qin Wen laughed so hard they were doubled over, their laughter quite loud, drawing glares from the surrounding customers. The two had to try hard to suppress their laughter. Fortunately, the waiter brought the food, which stopped their commotion.
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TOP Posted: 2019-01-20 00:27 | Reply to 30th floor
Weak Water Demon

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(13)
The meal was quickly finished, and the three of them were still not satisfied, so they went to the nearby Shangdao Coffee Shop and found a seat on the second floor. At first, the three of them did not speak, but listened to the piano music playing in the shop and tasted the aroma of coffee. Because there were not many people, coupled with the pleasant light music and soft lighting, the whole environment felt very warm and quiet, which made people very relaxed.
"Qin Wen, there's something I've been wanting to ask you, but I was always afraid of being too abrupt. The atmosphere's nice today, so I thought I'd ask again." Seeing Qin Wen sitting quietly on the sofa opposite him, sipping his coffee, Qi Ming couldn't help but break the silence first.
"Go ahead and ask. There's nothing wrong with that. I'll answer any question." Qin Wen smiled faintly and put down his coffee.
"Why haven't you gotten married yet?" Qi Ming knew Qin Wen had a straightforward side, so he decided to ask directly without hesitation. "Is it because you haven't met the right person, or..."
"Don't guess. As of now, I haven't decided whether I'll get married in this lifetime!"
"Not getting married?" Qi Ming was quite surprised. He glanced at Du Lin, who was smiling at him, clearly aware of the situation. "You two are really interesting. One doesn't want children, and the other is even more decisive, not even getting married. Is this the result of your Western upbringing? But foreigners also get married and have children, and many of them at that. I really don't understand you!"
“This has nothing to do with studying abroad,” Qin Wen laughed after hearing Qi Ming’s words, glancing at Du Lin. “Let him speak; he’s a sociology major.”
“I think it has something to do with having lived abroad before. At least it removed many mental constraints and limitations,” Du Lin picked up his cup, took a sip of coffee, and continued, “Qin Wen and I have discussed this topic many times. She doesn’t actually agree that marriage is the only legal way for men and women to unite.”
“Exactly. I’m naturally very fickle. Whether it’s toys from childhood or relationships with men as an adult, once the novelty wears off, I lose interest and passion. A marriage certificate binds me to a man for life, no matter how good he is, I can’t stand it. It feels like selling myself. Hehe, I can’t help it; that’s just my personality. I don’t want to compromise myself, and I often pride myself on this as respecting my humanity.”
“We should look at it this way,” Du Lin continued, picking up where Qin Wen left off. “The orthodox education we receive from childhood teaches us to always think of others and to have a spirit of selflessness. It’s as if we live for others, and that thinking of ourselves is selfish and deserving of scorn and discrimination. I don’t deny that there are morally upright people who sacrifice themselves for righteousness, but most of us are just ordinary people, and human nature is primarily self-centered. As the ancients said, ‘If a person doesn’t look out for themselves, they will be punished by heaven and earth.’ Being able to act in one’s own self-interest without harming others is a human nature that deserves respect.”
“I think what you’re saying makes sense,” Qi Ming finally spoke up after listening for a while. “But does it mean we should all stay single like Qin Wen? According to her, we shouldn’t get married in order to respect our own humanity? Yu Han and I have been married and living together for over six years, and I haven’t felt that my humanity has been wronged in any way.”
"Are you afraid others won't know how sweet your life is?" Du Lin chuckled, patting Qi Ming on the shoulder. "No one denies the beauty and happiness of married life. Even Qin Wen often envies or longs for family life. What makes her hesitate is how long a happy marriage can last—what we often call the 'shelf life.' One thing you can't deny: do you and Yu Han still have the passion you had when you were dating? Haven't you ever fantasized about having a passionate affair with a woman other than Yu Han?"
Qi Ming had never imagined that two men and a woman could sit together and talk so freely about marriage, sex, and passion without feeling awkward. This was unimaginable in his previous social circle. Although he hadn't fully accepted some of their views, he really liked this atmosphere, this casual feeling.
“Hehe, your statement sounds a lot like the opinions in the Couples' Forum you showed me,” Qiming said. After saying this, he clearly saw Du Lin and Qin Wen exchange knowing smiles. He asked in surprise, “What, Qin Wen also knows about this forum?”
Qin Wen looked at Du Lin with an inquiring gaze. Du Lin smiled and nodded. Then Qin Wen looked at Qiming and said, “Actually, the Couples' Forum was started by Du Lin and me!”
“Ah…??? No way?” Qiming could hardly believe his ears. He had speculated about Du Lin’s relationship with the Couples' Forum before, but he only thought about whether Du Lin had participated in couples’ dating activities. He never expected that this forum would be started by Du Lin and Qin Wen together, especially Qin Wen, who hadn’t even gotten married yet, and he was actually running a couples’ dating website. "How did you come up with the idea of starting this forum?"
"Actually, we came across quite a few websites like this when we were abroad," Qin Wen smiled slightly at Qi Ming's stunned expression. "Back then, I told Du Lin that we should start a forum like this after we returned to China, and he said that such a concept wouldn't be accepted in China at this stage. But after we returned, we searched online and found several such websites, but they were too explicit and went against the original intention of couples making friends, so we wanted to start a forum like this even more."
"Is it legal to run such a website?" Qi Ming asked with some concern.
"Before we started, we carefully reviewed all the relevant laws and regulations on internet management, and filed a record with the relevant departments," Du Lin continued, picking up where Qin Wen left off. "How should I put it? We were skirting the edge of the law and various regulations. Currently, there's no law in China that explicitly prohibits running such a website. Since the law doesn't prohibit it, it shouldn't be considered illegal, right?"
"Actually, we're just providing a platform for couples to make friends," Qin Wen said, pouring coffee into everyone's cups. "While couples making friends may seem out of step with mainstream society, it's still a lifestyle choice. Call it heresy or avant-garde, it exists in real life and is a way to break the monopoly of marriage on sex."
"Marriage is a monopoly on sex?" This was the first time Qi Ming had heard of such a view on marriage, and it felt very novel.
"Isn't that right?" Qin Wen countered. "Once a man and a woman sign that marriage certificate, existing laws and morals only recognize the sex between them as legal, cutting off their chance for sexual contact outside of marriage for life, unless they divorce. Of course, there are cases of extramarital affairs, keeping mistresses, and soliciting prostitutes, but that's also a betrayal of marriage or feelings. Don't you think marriage is a kind of monopoly on sex?"
"Today, hearing your words is truly more valuable than reading for ten years," Qi Ming said sincerely. "Actually, when I first joined the Couples' Forum, I just found it novel and exciting, and at most, I could accept the concept of couples making friends. After hearing what you said today, many of my views have been updated. I really didn't think of so many things before."
“Actually, you’ve hit the nail on the head,” Du Lin continued, picking up where Qi Ming left off. “After many years of marriage, a couple’s feelings for each other deepen, but that initial passion fades due to familiarity and the passage of time. Sex lacking passion feels like a routine; the body still needs it, but the process is like chewing gum—the more you chew, the less flavorful it becomes. Couples engaging in dating is a lifestyle, albeit one that deviates from the current mainstream. Participating in couples’ dating activities requires both partners to be open to this lifestyle; otherwise, not only will they fail to gain stimulation and pleasure, but it may also leave a shadow on their future lives.”
“I’ve read many couples’ experiences of dating on the forum, and with very few exceptions, most feel that their relationship has deepened afterward, and their sex life has become more frequent and harmonious.” Qi Ming hesitated for a moment, then added, “There’s a question I’m not sure if I can ask: since you’re the ones who run the Couples’ Forum, then…”
“You don’t need to say anything, I know what you’re going to ask,” Du Lin interrupted Qi Ming with a smile, seeing his hesitant expression. “If you’re really interested, I’ll let you know when a suitable opportunity arises, for example, if the couples agree to have single men participate. But you absolutely mustn’t tell Yu Han before she accepts this idea!”

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