【And then?】Part 5

Chapter Five: What is Exchange—The First Flame of Desire.

Back home, after a quick wash, we fell into each other's arms on the bed.

After the usual tender moments, Si drifted off to sleep. But I tossed and turned, unable to sleep. Remembering the post I hadn't finished reading, I got up, put on my robe, and went to the study.

After turning on the computer, I lit a cigarette and found the post about sex.

Skipping the descriptions of sexual scenes, at the end of the post, this once-confused man talked about marriage, about…sex and love.

For many years, we have stubbornly categorized sex as a form of expression of love; the unity of sex and love is the unity of spirit and flesh. We stubbornly believe that this kind of love is perfect.

Because marriage is a product of private ownership, and also the most direct manifestation of private ownership. This includes ownership of the sexual relationship between the couple, a right that no one else can infringe upon.

The union of a couple, both legally and psychologically, gives both parties a sense of security and belonging. Emotion is the carrier and framework supporting this relationship, and sex is the channel for communication within this framework. Finally, through the constraints of human ethics and morality, sex is confined within such a framework, allowing no transgression whatsoever.

But why can't we view sex as just another aspect of life, like eating, dressing, sleeping, going to work, traveling, and so on? As long as we steadfastly love each other, why can't we let our bodies and minds freely enjoy the process of sex? While monogamy can provide a sense of security, this system, due to the lack of competition, can lead to a gradual loss of interest after the initial novelty wears off, resulting in aesthetic fatigue.

The loss of passion causes them to gradually lose their previous enthusiasm and engagement with each other's bodies. Is this true sexual harmony? How many divorces are caused by disappointment with a monotonous life and the lack of physical attraction between spouses? Why can't we prevent these things from happening?

Everyone has a psychological need for novelty and stimulation. If, under mutual control, each partner can let go of the constraints on sex and, while deeply loving each other, allow their bodies to enjoy ultimate pleasure, why can't they? This can create a slight sense of loss for both partners, and the potential loss of each other can rekindle the passion they once shared. A renewed understanding, communication, and attraction can revitalize a marriage that was once as barren as a tomb of love, strengthening their bond. Isn't this what we all yearn for? Why not?

...

After reading the entire post, I was sweating profusely.

Although I knew it was wrong, I didn't know how to refute it. Instead, a deep-seated desire within me seemed to awaken, slowly coursing through my body. Like someone possessed, I frantically pondered this question.

The separation of sex and love—is that even possible? Shouldn't my wife's body belong only to me? Why do I tremble with excitement at the thought of Si being beneath someone else? Am I enjoying this feeling?

Can I bear to see Si being penetrated by another man? Would I let another man enjoy Si's exquisite body?

Why...why not?

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【And then?】Part 5

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