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Is this a good way to develop one's wife? 

Hello everyone, I've been trying to "develop" my wife for almost five years, but I still haven't succeeded.
Here's the situation: shortly after we got married, my wife had a lover, and it lasted for about three years. I eventually managed to get the information out of her. She admitted that for a long time she was completely listless. Perhaps we didn't handle it well, and as a result, I can't "develop"
her anymore. During that time, I cheated on her, and she found out. When she discovered my infidelity, she was devastated, but she calmed down eventually. Actually, my lover and I had three-person sex three or four times. I'm trying to use this experience (telling my wife that I had three-person sex with my lover) to "develop" my wife. I hope you can tell me in writing whether this is feasible.

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