Classic dialogues between Chinese men and women

In the eyes of the ancients, marriage was sacred. The *Book of Rites* states, "The essence of rites is to establish the distinction between men and women, and to establish the righteousness between husband and wife. With the distinction between men and women, there is righteousness between husband and wife; with righteousness between husband and wife, there is affection between father and son; with affection between father and son, there is order between ruler and subject. Therefore, it is said: marriage is the foundation of rites."
Modern Chinese people treat marriage very casually, a stark contrast to the ancients' understanding and attitude towards it. Below is a humorous dialogue between a contemporary Chinese couple, which may offer a glimpse into the current Chinese view of marriage.
*Pre-marital conversation
: Woman: You had a girlfriend before?
Man: Ten years have passed, life and death are separated by a vast distance, I don't think of her, yet I can't forget her.
Woman: Dead? How did she die?
Man: The mountains crumbled, the rivers dried up, winter thunder roared, and summer snow fell.
Woman: Oh, a natural disaster. How have you managed all these years?
Man: My face is covered in dust and soot, my hands are gray, and my ten fingers are black.
Woman: Sigh, it wasn't easy. What was your first impression of me when you saw me?
Man: Suddenly, like a spring breeze overnight, thousands of pear trees bloom.*
Woman: (Blushing) Is it really that good?
Man: What is passed down as dross is not pure beauty; what cannot be captured in painting is spirit.
Woman: You flatterer—do you have any ideals?
Man: If I achieve my lofty ambitions in the future, I dare to laugh at Huang Chao for not being a true man.
Woman: What… is your view on love?
Man: Only in this mountain, where the clouds are deep and I know not where.
Woman: Do you like reading?
Man: Twelve volumes of military records, each one bearing my name!
Woman: Isn't that a bit of a boast? With such great talent, how come you're still single?
Man: A young woman unmarried is like a guest in a strange land; the bitterness in her heart is known only to herself.
Woman: (Laughing) If, I mean if, I agree to marry you, how do you plan to treat me?
Man: A pure heart in a jade pot!
Woman: You promise you won't be moved by other women?
Man: My heart will never waver; it's like still water in an ancient well.
Woman: I'll believe you this time, but I'm planning to study in America. Can you wait for me?
Man: Years will pass, and all the beautiful moments will be in vain.
Woman: But…
Man: Alone I lean on the railing, the boundless rivers and mountains stretch out before me; parting is easy, meeting again is hard!
Woman: But…
Man: Gazing at my husband's place, the river flows on and on; I'll turn to stone, never to look back!
Woman: Alright, alright, I'm scared of you…
·After marriage
Woman: We've been married for so long, and you're still thinking about your ex-girlfriend?
Man: Once you've seen the ocean, other waters seem insignificant; once you've seen the clouds of Wushan, other clouds seem pale.
Woman: Then why did you marry me back then?
Man: In my dreams, I didn't know I was a guest; I indulged in fleeting pleasures.
Woman: That's too much! We're husband and wife, after all.
Man: Husbands and wives are like birds in the same forest; when disaster strikes, they fly away separately.
Woman: So what do you think of our marriage?
Man: I wake up and look at my handkerchief several times; even in my dreams, my heart is still cold!
Woman: Is it that bad? Didn't you say your first impression of me was…?
Man: Beautiful women fill the spring palace like flowers, but only partridges fly by my side.
Woman: That's not how it's supposed to be, is it? Could it be that you actually…?
Man: My past depravity is nothing to boast about; today, my thoughts are boundless with unbridled indulgence.
Woman: I never believed what my friends told me, but it turns out it's true!
Man: Knowledge gained from books is ultimately superficial; true understanding comes from practice.
Woman: Where have all your ideals gone?
Man: I'll exchange fleeting fame for quiet contemplation.
Woman: (Tears welling in her eyes) You...you promised me a pure heart?
Man: I couldn't bear to see this thing; I burned it to ashes.
Woman: Aren't you afraid of being ridiculed by family and friends, and cursed by future generations?
Man: I'd rather die on a fragrant branch than be blown away by the north wind.
Woman: What if I don't agree to a divorce?
Man: We can still be friends after a breakup; why insist on being blood relatives?
Woman: Fine, that's ruthless enough! This is the kind of Chinese man you're talking about!

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Classic dialogues between Chinese men and women

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