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Seeking guidance 

A few years ago, I started secretly checking my wife's phone and discovered she was having an affair. Initially, instead of blaming her, I felt a thrill. Later, my wife broke up with that guy. I then encouraged her to find someone else, and soon she did. This guy is almost ten years older than her, and they've been seeing each other for two years. Recently, my wife told me she doesn't want to continue the relationship. I suggested she find someone else, or try a one-night stand or a threesome with someone she met online, but she disagrees. Before, my wife and her lover were quite open with each other, and she would occasionally tell me about them. Now, I'm trying to develop a threesome relationship, but I feel like I've hit a roadblock. I don't know how to guide my wife further. Are there any experienced men who have successfully "developed" their relationships with their wives who can offer some advice? Thank you!

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