Wealthy and powerful

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1. A man was chatting up a beautiful woman in a bar. He asked, "What kind of man are you interested in, beautiful lady?" The woman was silent for a moment, then said modestly, "Rich and well-endowed."

2. A woman had a very flat chest and was afraid her boyfriend would find out and dislike her, so she kept it a secret. Finally, they slept together for the first time, turned off the lights, and got into bed. When the boyfriend touched her breasts, he said, "Honey, don't sleep on your stomach!"

3. Two parrots were sitting idly in a tree when they suddenly saw a wolf chasing a sheep below. The female parrot said something to the male parrot, and was immediately raped… (The sheep below was itchy).

4. Lanlan was shopping at a mall when she happened to see Sony promoting a new doll—it could move its left leg when she said "hmm" and its right leg when she said "ah." She thought it was fun, so she bought one. That very night, the doll ran away from home!

5. A man went to see a psychologist: "I can't take it anymore! My wife is unfaithful to me!" The psychologist: "Relax, how exactly is she unfaithful?" The man: "She goes to bars every night and is interested in almost every man. I'm going crazy!" The psychologist: "Don't get too agitated! Tell me, where is this bar?"

6. A prostitute was arrested and interrogated by the anti-prostitution squad. The prostitute argued: "I just sold a two-yuan contraceptive for two hundred yuan!" The anti-prostitution squad angrily asked her: "Still daring to argue! What happened next?" The prostitute explained: "Later... later, I taught him how to use it, that's after-sales service."

7. A foreigner went to the Forbidden City but didn't know how to get there, so he asked someone for directions. Because the foreigner confused the Forbidden City with the Forbidden City itself, he asked, "How do I get to the Forbidden City?" A passerby glared at the foreigner and replied, "Go to the end, you motherfucker."

8. A wife and husband were shopping when a strong gust of wind suddenly blew up the wife's skirt! The wife panicked, holding down her skirt and shouting, "Oh my god! I'm exposing myself!" The husband rolled his eyes and said, "Please! It's more like airing our dirty laundry in public!"

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