I'd already taken my pants off, but then all sorts of bizarre situations came my way.

page views:1 Publication date:2022-04-26

Laugh Point 1: I'm Not a Beast

Orange/Male/33 years old

I remember during our honeymoon, my wife and I booked a standard room (with two beds) to save money. After getting the key, my wife said "fiercely," "Don't come over! Coming over means you're a beast!" Of course, I knew the unspoken part was "Not coming over means you're worse than a beast," so I chose to be the "beast."

Half an hour later, panting, we turned on the bedside lamp and couldn't help but laugh: her zipper was tangled with my pants, probably caught when she was "playing hard to get." Seeing the two of us "connected" in an awkward way, we couldn't stop laughing, but for the next half hour, we spent both fumbling to untangle it.

Laugh Index: ***

Laugh Point 2: Rose, Rose, I Hate You

Xiao Qiao/Female/26 years old

I helped design the bathroom in our new wedding room, the highlight being the beautiful bathtub… This was my long-planned couple's bath. I turned on the CD player, filled the tub with hot water, and sprinkled some rose petals I'd specially bought… Everything went according to plan, the romantic atmosphere swirling around us with the steam. But then, we suddenly noticed something sticking to our skin, itchy, preventing us from fully immersing ourselves in the moment. It turned out the wet petals were like an insidious "other woman," always sticking to us. Unable to bear it any longer, we decided to remove the obstacle before continuing our romance. Just then, my husband stood up, preparing to step out of the bathtub, and stepped on the wet petals, "thud!" and fell flat on his back. I couldn't help but burst out laughing.

Laughter Index: ****

Laughter Point Three: Counterfeit Condoms

Zhi Qiu/Female/28 years old

Back then, we hadn't been working long and rented a small single room. The space was small, cluttered, and it was impossible for it not to be messy. However, even in such harsh conditions, we were still able to maintain our revolutionary optimism and persist in our "devotion of love," which was truly admirable. That day, when the mood struck, I reminded him, "Today isn't your safe period." He stopped awkwardly, then rummaged around on the table for a while, finally finding the small, square plastic bag, and eagerly tore it open… Then I heard him scream “Ah!”

I turned on the light, and there he was, dumbfounded. It turned out he wasn't holding a condom, but a packet of instant noodle seasoning… Instantly, we both burst into laughter. “Wouldn’t it taste better with some seasoning?” “Want to try some too?”

Laughter Index: *****

Laughter Point Four:

danny/Female/25 years old

I was removing my makeup in the bathroom when I suddenly felt a gentle embrace around my waist. Here we go again, this lecherous husband! We just got married, and he always unexpectedly clings to me, regardless of the place—the sofa, the floor, even the kitchen often become our lovemaking spot. Ignoring my protests, he had already kissed me. Gradually, I forgot what we were supposed to be doing and became lost in the moment. In my daze, he pulled off my clothes, then picked me up and placed me on the washing machine next to him. However, just as he started working diligently, a sudden change startled us—the washing machine suddenly began to vibrate—apparently, someone had accidentally touched the switch…

After figuring out the situation, I laughed so hard I almost couldn't stand up straight. But my lecherous husband, after a moment of surprise, suddenly smiled slyly: “Perfect! It's practically comparable to the lovemaking bed in Forbidden City Cop!”

Laughter Index: ***

Laughter Point Five: Changing Clothes

Xiongxiong/Female/30 years old Lights off. He leaned closer, and I knew he wanted to make love again. Yes, that's the good thing about being an old married couple; we don't even need to turn on the lights. In this "low-carbon" state, we easily completed our "homework." But neither of us was too lazy to get up again, so we fumbled for our clothes in the dark, threw them on, and went to sleep.

The next morning, the child, eager for the trip, got up first and came to pull us out of bed. As we groggily sat up, the child suddenly burst into laughter.

We looked at each other for a second, instantly wide awake, and then burst into laughter: I was wearing his t-shirt, which was so loose it looked like a sack; while he, on the other hand, somehow managed to slip my pink pajamas on, the cute little bear stretched out and looking quite bizarre.

Laughter Index: ****

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I'd already taken my pants off, but then all sorts of bizarre situations came my way.

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