Five short jokes

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The security
guard was talking to a girl: "Sorry, swimming is prohibited here."
"Then why didn't you tell me before I took off my clothes?"
"We didn't prohibit taking off clothes."
Heartbroken:
"What are you saying in your sleep that's so hurtful?"
"My husband's back, you'd better leave!"
"Is there anything more hurtful than this?"
"My husband's back, you'd better leave!"
Waiting:
I'm a security guard. It's snowing outside, and the wind is a bit strong. A beautiful girl is shivering in the cold wind at the door. I can't bear it, so I ask, "Are you waiting for your boyfriend or your parents?"
She: "I'm waiting for my boyfriend."
Me: "Oh, then you can just stand there and wait!"
Method
: "Master, I'm pursuing a goddess. She gave me ten conditions. I've already met nine of them. The last condition is: I must stand perfectly straight, my hands and feet can't move, and I can't hold anything. She has to stand 18 centimeters away from me. If I touch any part of her body, she'll accept my advances. I've been thinking about this for three days. How can I do it?"
"Are you fucking stupid? Go pee on her!" During a final exam in junior high, the girl sitting in front of me was very serious and careful, and she was willing to let me copy her answers.
To avoid suspicion, I deliberately changed a few multiple-choice questions wrong.

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Five short jokes

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