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My dad - 21. She always keeps the light on. 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-05-29  
The door downstairs slammed shut, and the footsteps outside gradually faded away...
An Qidong went out.
An Nuan thought to herself, her face expressionless...
Only An Qidong himself knew that he had fled in a disheveled and humiliating manner...
After going downstairs, the night breeze was slightly cool, which gradually calmed An Qidong down.
"Clatter..."
The sound of lighters clashing together.
An Qidong lit a cigarette, the wisps of smoke blurring the night, the slightly bitter taste of nicotine seeming amplified many times over...
An Nuan was well-behaved and intelligent from a young age. Unlike other children, she didn't cry, whine, or act unreasonably...
Sometimes her sense of propriety is heartbreaking.
She would act coquettishly and laugh with him, but she would never make a fuss when he was working or feeling irritable.
Sometimes when he was tired from work, he would forget what he had promised An Nuan, and she wouldn't say anything, but she would bring it up with a smile sometime later...
Every word she said was perfectly timed, never making anyone feel awkward or embarrassed...
She was always polite and gentle in her interactions with others; she was the kind of good child that everyone thought she was.
...
An Qidong took a deep drag on his cigarette. He didn't know when An Nuan's feelings for him had changed. Thinking of that thick diary notebook, the crazy, obsessive, and desperate emotions inside sent a chill down An Qidong's spine...
This shouldn't be the case. An Nuan shouldn't be like this.
An Nuan should grow up like a flower in the warm morning sun, making many like-minded friends in the vibrant years of her youth, embracing the best love in the most beautiful age, and marrying the most suitable person at the most suitable time...
As her father, he should have been her protector during her childhood, her guide as she grew up, and the gatekeeper of her friendships and love.
It shouldn't be the person she admires...
He rubbed his temples, thinking that he couldn't just let it go, but how could he manage it...?
The wind is getting stronger, and my head is getting more and more painful...
One cigarette butt after another was stubbed out at An Qidong's feet. He looked up and saw the light still on in his house, remembering that he was waiting for someone to come home...
An Qidong suddenly remembered that every time he worked a late shift, the light at home was always on, and An Nuan would always be sitting at the coffee table in the living room, holding a book, reciting vocabulary or ancient poems...
When he came back, I smiled at him and said, "Dad, you've worked hard," and then poured him a cup of warm water...
He felt that An Nuan was a diligent student and a warm-hearted and considerate person...
Looking back now, it was probably An Nuan who was waiting for him, because An Nuan usually didn't stay up very late when he wasn't working overtime...
A bitter feeling welled up inside me. I reached into my pocket—no cigarettes left…
Looking at the convenience store not far away, and remembering the light still on at home, An Qidong started walking towards the convenience store...
It wasn't until late at night, when An Qidong saw that the lights in his house were finally turned off, that he lingered downstairs for another hour or two before slowly making his way home...
He opened the door, and the house looked and smelled so familiar, but An Qidong knew that something was different...
He didn't go upstairs, but went to the study to retrieve the documents the company needed for the day. After a quick wash, An Qidong quietly left again...
Before leaving, he looked up and saw that An Nuan's door was tightly closed...

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