Reflections on the Methods and Approaches of Couples' Activities

Thoughts on Couple Activities
Dear couples experts, what are your preferred ways to engage in activities? After two attempts at couple activities, the experience wasn't great, and now my wife doesn't even want to do it anymore. I'd like to ask for your advice and guidance on better methods. I personally want to find a regular partner, but it's too difficult to find in reality. The
poor experience is due to two reasons: First, the partners we find online aren't very familiar with each other beforehand, so the process doesn't feel particularly good. It's like strangers having sex together, which feels very uninteresting. My intention in finding partners online was to get to know them better before engaging in activities, but in reality, many don't meet these conditions. Second, the disadvantage of couples finding partners is that it's difficult for all four people to be compatible and satisfied. If we're doing it individually, my wife can easily find someone handsome and young. Currently, I've found that many methods fall into the following categories:
only finding singles. This
goes against our initial intentions and is basically not considered. Advantages
of each person doing it individually
: We can find very high-quality partners and get to know each other a little better and develop some feelings. Women who are familiar with each other understand this.
Disadvantages: We lose the fun of spiced intimacy and there's a possibility of unexpected emotional encounters. Not to mention, it doesn't improve the harmony between the couple. It's still not safe; playing too much always carries risks. Couples are relatively more reliable.
Playing together as a couple:
Advantages: Various gameplay options, multi-person games, truly enhancing marital life. No more barriers between couples.
Disadvantages: So far, none have been particularly enjoyable, and finding compatible partners is extremely difficult.
Playing as a couple first, then separately privately:
While this method combines the advantages of the previous two, it also has its disadvantages.

The initial intention of playing this was to spice up marital life and seek different sexual experiences. Ideally, there should be a certain level of affection, above friendship but below marriage. Currently, this hasn't been achieved. My wife and I both feel it's not very good. Reflecting on the reasons, I think my expectations are too realistic and don't align, hence this post seeking expert advice.
I previously read "A Glimmer of Light in a Chaotic World" on 69, shared with Beibei Pig. Several couples regularly play this, and it felt like my ideal way to play; it felt really good, but reality is too difficult. Most couples probably only stay in touch after one or two times.

Currently, I feel I haven't done enough:
I need to lower my standards. It's not easy for two people to be attracted to each other, let alone four. Focus on the main needs.
I'd like to find someone I'm somewhat familiar with, but it's difficult to get to know someone online. Due to family and work commitments, I don't have many opportunities to contact them offline, which significantly reduces the chances. I'm also not particularly good at flirting.
However, I welcome like-minded friends to contact me. You know what I mean.

Finally, please share your thoughts on the best way to have fun, and the methods and paths to achieve it. Or, please offer some guidance; sharing your experiences is welcome.

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Reflections on the Methods and Approaches of Couples' Activities

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