The grudges of a lifetime come to an end

After that night, I felt much calmer. I began to feel guilty towards Xiaoling. I didn't see her again, nor did I dare to. In my life, she became an exclamation mark. I buried this matter deep in my heart like an ostrich burying its head in the sand… A month after graduation, I received my enlistment notice and a call from Xiaomin. She sounded apologetic on the phone. I asked her out for dinner. This time, I didn't say anything, but she took the initiative to tell me, "Let's talk about everything after we've settled into our jobs, okay? No matter where you go in the future, I'll keep in touch with you!" I didn't say anything, but I knew in my heart that one day I would wait for her. And so, I enlisted. Basic training was a half-dead experience, listening to those corrupt officers spout nonsense every day. Sometimes I really wondered if listening to them for too long would turn me into an idiot.

Xiaomin continued to correspond with me after I enlisted. From her letters, I learned that she had rented a dormitory in Taipei and lived alone. In the military, a place that felt like a prison, writing letters became my pillar of support. A month later, during the consecutive holidays, I was like a bird released from its cage, rushing north to find Xiaomin and living the same life as before, feeling like I was back in college... On the afternoon of the sixth day, I was preparing to return to the army, my heart filled with reluctance. Xiaomin grabbed my hand and insisted on showing me something, so she went into her room, gave me a piece of cloth and told me to cover my eyes, saying she was shy. I was puzzled, why would I be shy about something? She pulled me to sit on her bed, and after a while I felt someone pull down their pants and take out my penis. I was startled and tried to cover it with my hands, but Xiaomin replied, "Don't move. This is my first time giving a boy oral sex,

I'm a little shy, and I don't know if I'm doing it right. I hope you'll feel good!" After saying that, she licked my glans twice with her tongue and then took my penis into her mouth, starting to suck and spit. I felt a wet and warm sensation enveloping my penis. Although her movements were clumsy, I could feel her trying her best to move back and forth. I quickly got hard, and when Xiaomin saw that I was hard, she moved even faster. I grabbed her head and pressed it against my penis, and helped her to move even faster. After a while, I felt a tightness in my penis and quickly pulled Xiaomin's head up, but it was too late. Some semen still splattered on Xiaomin's face. She didn't bother to wipe it off, but instead bent down to lick the filth off my penis. I picked up a tissue and wiped the semen off Xiaomin's face, feeling a mix of emotions. Xiaomin said, "My technique isn't very good! I just learned it from porn recently. How was it?" "

Hmm..."

"I hit you a while ago, and I've felt really bad about it. It's not that I don't like you, but I wanted to wait until we both had jobs before we started dating. I've never been with a boy before, so I thought maybe helping you satisfy your male needs could make up for it!" After saying that, Xiaomin blushed and shyly lifted her skirt, asking, "Does it look good? I bought it especially because I knew you were coming to my place..." It was a low-waisted pink lace panty, paired with a pair of beautiful legs. What man wouldn't be aroused? "Um...I...look good..." I was speechless for a moment. "Can you hold back for now? You can touch me wherever you want, but don't do anything. I'm still a graduate student. Let's wait until we're both settled before you do anything, okay?" I nodded in agreement, carried Xiaomin to the bed, and reached under her skirt to caress her private parts. Xiaomin gritted her teeth, looking nervous. I then rubbed her breasts with my hands; they were very soft. Xiaomin's face flushed again. I kissed her, my tongue swirling inside her mouth. It felt so warm. So this is what kissing a girl feels like. I didn't go any further, but my disobedient little brother got aroused again. Seeing this, Xiaomin gave me oral sex again and told me it was okay if I ejaculated inside. She actually swallowed my semen. Afterwards, Xiaomin and I went to the station, and she reluctantly saw me off. I originally thought this was the beginning of happiness, but I didn't expect that every move I made that afternoon was seen by someone, sowing the seeds for unbearable days to come.

After the lottery, I was assigned to a mountainous area in the east. Although it was still on the island, it felt so far from home. The military wasn't as strict as basic training. Xiaomin and I went from writing letters to talking on the phone, and my support changed from a pen to a public telephone receiver! Unfortunately, because of the military, I often had to accumulate leave, and taking leave became what I longed for most. I don't know when it started, but Xiaomin and I went from talking about everything and having great conversations to suddenly becoming taciturn. At first, I thought it was just temporary, but as time went on, Xiaomin became hesitant and even got nervous after only a few sentences! Was there something she couldn't say? I asked her this, but she said nothing was wrong. Although I didn't say anything more, I vaguely felt that something was off. Despite having a thousand questions in my mind, the military was still inhumane and relentlessly corrupt, the officers were still full of nonsense and lies, and the barracks looked like a desolate wasteland. But Xiaomin was talking less and less, and my questions were growing! "Wait for the holiday, I miss her so much, I must go to the north to see her," I shouted to myself. "Abang, visitor!"

In the middle of the morning drills, someone called out to me, and the other brothers looked at me with envy. Of course, when you're sweating buckets and working yourself to the bone, a visitor suddenly comes, it's like a gift from heaven. But I wondered who would come to see me at a time like this? My parents haven't paid much attention to me since college, Xiaomin is too busy at the research institute, and the other classmates probably don't have time to come to this godforsaken place. With doubts, I walked into the visitor room, only to see Xiao Chen sitting with his legs crossed, grinning at me, with a rather large man sitting next to him. He didn't seem like a good guy either. My face immediately darkened. "Damn it, talking to this kind of person is worse than taking me back and fucking me half to death," I muttered to myself. Little Chen, however, didn't think so. Seeing me was like seeing a good friend; he grinned and asked, "Brother Bang! Hello! Long time no see! You've gotten so muscular..."

"What are you doing here?" I replied impatiently. "Oh, why so melancholy? Of course, I've come to visit you, and brought some good stuff as a gift to help you recover, hahaha..." "Here! Brother Bang, please accept this; it's a good thing!" Bang shoved something wrapped in a brown paper bag into my hand and told me to open it and see! What the hell is this? "Oh, just open it and you'll understand. You'll definitely want it. Open it now!" "I opened the brown paper bag and took out a set of women's underwear. The panties were low-waisted, pink, and lace-trimmed, with bloodstains on them. The style was exactly the same as what Xiaomin wore that day! My mood instantly plummeted. Hundreds of thoughts flashed through my mind. I dared not guess what had happened. Looking at Xiao Chen's smirking face and Xiaomin's gradually fading laughter, my long-standing doubts turned into terrifying thoughts. This... Xiaomin's? Where is Xiaomin? What did you do to Xiaomin, you bastard?" My voice grew louder and louder, but he still chuckled and said, "Don't be nervous! Xiaomin is fine now, and she's very obedient. I told her to suck, and she sucked; I told her to lie down, and she lay down; I told her to take off her clothes, and she took them off. Oh, and what's even better is that she's still a virgin! It's a pity you didn't see the night she was deflowered. She screamed quite loudly. But it's okay, I brought you the underwear she wore that night. It still has bloodstains on it." "Oh, and I recorded it too. I can show it to you another day... hahaha..." I couldn't stand it anymore. I was furious. I stood up, grabbed Xiao Chen's collar, and yelled at him to shut up. My actions attracted the attention of a nearby sergeant. Xiao Chen pulled my hand away and laughed, "Relax! This is a military camp! Want to be arrested and locked up?" I sat down and glared at him, saying, "Let Xiao Min go, or I'll make you regret it!" "Make me regret it? Brother Bang, you're joking. How are you going to make me regret it? Besides, Xiao Min is clinging to me every day! I'll treat her the way you treat me!" When I heard this, I felt helpless. I was still in the army. If I angered Xiao Chen, I really didn't know what he would do to Xiao Min when he got back. Thinking of this, I broke out in a cold sweat and replied, "Xiao Chen, let her go!" "We're all men. If you've ever been unhappy, just come to me. Why take it out on a woman? If you really can't swallow this, I'll let you get your revenge when I get out of here. This has nothing to do with Xiaomin!" Xiao Chen's face darkened, and he said angrily, "Hmph...revenge! Remember what happened with Xiaoling? You exposed my shameful deeds, got me expelled from school, and had to deal with a bunch of lawsuits. Do you know that no one has ever dared to treat me like this since I was a child?"

I'm telling you, whichever woman I want, she'll obediently take off her pants and lie down for me to have, without any choice. What I lost, what I suffered humiliation, I'll repay you tenfold! Just you wait and see! Then his face returned to a grinning expression. "Right! It's getting late, time to go back and play with my girls… What should we do today? Hahahaha…" Looking at Xiao Chen's smug face, I felt only heartbreak and the sorrow of a petty person's triumph. Staring at Xiao Min's underwear on the table, her shy face from that day reappeared in my mind. How is she doing now?

Finally, the holiday arrived. I packed a few simple bags and rushed north. Arriving at Xiao Min's dormitory, I felt extremely uneasy. Dragging my heavy steps upstairs… I heard a girl's loud moans coming from Xiaomin's room. I stood there, listening to her incessant wailing and pleas for mercy, accompanied by the sounds of skin colliding, the creaking of the wooden bed, and the occasional vulgar curse from a man. Xiaomin was being violently violated in her room; her near-frantic cries and pleas seemed to demonstrate the man's utter lack of tenderness. I felt frozen in place, my legs weak, listening helplessly to the sounds inside. Soon, the man's shouts intensified, and Xiaomin's cries grew louder until a final scream, and then everything fell silent. I stared at Xiaomin's dormitory door, hoping it was all a dream, a nightmare. Just then, the door opened, and there was Xiaomin, wearing a white dress. Her face was still as innocent as ever, but she had clearly lost weight. When Xiaomin saw me, tears streamed down her face uncontrollably. She cried, "Abang, it really is Abang, Abang... I... Waaah..." "Who is it?" the man inside shouted. Xiao Chen walked out in his underwear. When Xiaomin saw Abang, her face suddenly tensed up. She quickly wiped away her tears and said to Abang, "It's Abang..." "Oh! Brother Bang, you're here. Sorry, I was messing around with my girl earlier. Please forgive me for not welcoming you properly! Hahaha..." He turned to Xiaomin and said, "What are you daydreaming about? Hurry up and invite our Brother Bang in for a seat!" "Um... Brother Bang, please come in!" I walked into Xiaomin's dormitory. The furnishings were the same, except for a few men's clothes scattered on the floor. Xiao Chen and I sat facing each other. Xiao Chen told Xiaomin to go into the room and pack her things. I cut to the chase and said to Xiao Chen, "Xiao Chen, please let Xiao Min go! I'm out now. If you have any complaints or grievances, you can come to me now. I'll do anything you want. I just beg you to be magnanimous and let Xiao Min go. Please stop abusing her, okay?" I pleaded with Xiao Chen, but he just grinned and replied, "Abuse? You're exaggerating! Xiao Min is very happy with me right now!" Just look at him. After saying that, Xiao Chen called Xiao Min out. "Come tell Brother Bang if you like me? Quick!" Xiao Min looked at me and replied, "Yes, I really like being with Xiao Chen!" Xiao Chen then rubbed Xiao Min's buttocks and said, "Then tell Brother Bang how it feels to have sex with me. Is it good?" "Mmm...good! Yours is big...and thick. I always feel so good!"

"So, do you love me? Are you willing to do anything for me?" "Yes, I love you very much. I'll do anything you ask!" "Really?" "Really..." After a question-and-answer session, Xiao Chen suddenly said, "Then! Smile for us!" Xiao Min smiled. "Squat down!" Xiao Min squatted down. "Stand up!" Xiao Min stood up. "Put your butt up high!" Xiao Min stuck her butt up again. "Wag your butt a few times for us to see!" Xiao Min blushed and started wag her butt in front of us. Xiao Chen laughed loudly. "Pee..." "Huh?..." Xiao Min thought she misheard. "Pee here, now!" Xiao Chen repeated it again. I saw tears welling up in Xiao Min's eyes as she bent down and lifted her skirt... "Enough!" I couldn't bear to watch anymore. I yelled, stood up, turned around, and left. After a few steps, I looked back at Xiao Min, then at the smug Xiao Chen, and said, "Xiao Chen, please,

treat Xiao Min well..." Then I left this heartbreaking place.

During the holidays that followed, I wandered the streets like a lost soul. I was heartbroken and hated myself for not being able to protect the woman I loved and for Xiao Chen's cruelty. I didn't even know if I had eaten or not. I was so distracted that I was hit by a car but didn't feel any pain or discomfort! I didn't care about being cursed... until that day, I was walking down the street at night when Xiaomin called my name from behind. "Hmm!...Huh?...Xiaomin? Is that Xiaomin?"

Xiaomin nodded and smiled, and tears fell from my eyes—the first tears a man shed since adulthood. Xiaomin wiped the dirt off my face with her small hands and said to me, "Abang, please don't do this anymore, okay? It makes me so sad to see you like this. I ran away tonight! I'm really hopeless... Xiaochen is using drugs to control me, the dosage is huge. I can't even stand not taking the drugs for a day. I beg him! I beg him to give me the drugs every day so I can survive!

Please don't be sad for me anymore, okay? I'm a living dead now. Xiaochen is messing with me every day, and many of his brothers have messed with me too. I'm not clean anymore. He's getting more and more terrifying! He's also colluding with a huge gang behind him. It's hard for you to beat him. Listen to me, forget me, stay as far away from me as possible! Okay?" I said unwillingly, "I don't want to! I will definitely save you! You...you wait for me!" "Just bear with it a little longer, okay?" "Abang, listen to me, live well, live your own life, okay? We'll talk about the future later, I'll be fine... I can't stay too long, remember, listen to me, okay?" "Xiaomin... I..." Xiaomin didn't listen to me anymore, turned and left quickly... After returning to the army after leave, Xiaomin and I lost contact. Later, when I went to her dormitory during leave, it was empty. I asked friends and classmates, but there was no news of her. Xiao Chen was the same; it was as if she had disappeared from this world. My anger, helplessness, anxiety, resentment, and unwillingness quickly made me heartbroken. Over time, it became a painful memory, buried deep in my heart. Thinking of it made my chest ache. After being discharged from the army, I confidently entered a large company in the north, gritting my teeth and working my way up from the bottom. Thinking of... Driven by past humiliations, I was determined to climb the ladder. Years later, I managed to find out about Xiaomin somewhere. It turned out that Xiaomin had lost interest in her studies and was forced to drop out. After Xiao Chen got tired of her, he gave her to a gangster as a sex object, letting her be used and abused. She was even sold to a hotel as a prostitute. That was all I knew; I had no other information and still couldn't find her…

Three years later, through sheer hard work, I finally rose to the position of section chief in a large, highly competitive company. At the time, this was a remarkable achievement—a 27-year-old reaching that position! And in the days that followed… Because of my job, I often had to deal with banks. It was during this time that I met Ayin, the second woman I deeply loved. Although she was seven years younger than me, I was stunned when I first saw her. Her voice, face, height, and movements were exactly like Xiaomin's. I began to pursue her madly, even though she had a huge debt, I was determined to get through it with her. Just two short months later, we became deeply in love. Of course, I hoped this would be a way to make up for my broken and painful memories. But I didn't expect that fate was playing a cruel joke on me. This was not a way to make up for it, but the beginning of even more pain!

The annual company cadre meeting began. This was a major event for the company every year, and all employees above the section chief level had to attend. Of course, we were just small fry, and we could only stand. The general manager on the stage asked everyone to be quiet. He was going to introduce the company's new leadership team—the chairman, the executive director, and the CEO. Everyone clapped enthusiastically to welcome them out. But I was stunned. That unpleasant feeling, anger, resentment, and bitterness resurfaced in my heart! The executive director was Xiao Chen…

The latest address for the fourth-color picture boutique Mimi Color Bar is www.andejia.com

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The grudges of a lifetime come to an end

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