The Lustful Study Abroad Time of a Thirsty Young Woman

My Lustful Study Abroad Experiences:
I am 29 years old this year, and have been married to my husband for three years. A year after our marriage, I went abroad to study and have been there for two years now. My husband is still working in China. Although I have experienced the pain of separation, things have been relatively peaceful. However, in recent months, due to my lust, I have done many things that betrayed my husband, and I am still struggling with this distress…

From childhood, I have always been seen as a good girl. Because my parents were very strict, my thinking is also very traditional. When some classmates started dating in junior and senior high school, I felt it was shameful and didn't care much. I focused on my studies and eventually got into Shanghai Jiao Tong University with excellent grades. My parents were very happy, and I felt very proud.

When I first came to Shanghai for university, I saw many students starting to date. Although I could accept campus romances at that time, I never had a boyfriend. It wasn't that no one pursued me; quite a few people did, but I always felt that my first love should be someone I truly liked.

I didn't get my first boyfriend until my junior year of college. We fell in love at first sight, and the two years we spent together were truly wonderful. Even so, I always held firm to my boundaries, only giving him my first kiss, because I always believed that my most precious first time should be saved for my future husband. We were still in college, and the future was uncertain, even though we loved each other very much.

Sure enough, after graduation, we went our separate ways. He went back to his hometown of Qingdao, while my parents insisted that I stay in Shanghai, so we were forced to break up.

I was lucky enough to find a white-collar job at a foreign company thanks to my excellent grades and strong foreign language skills, allowing me to stay in Shanghai as my parents wished. After starting work, some men pursued me, and colleagues and friends introduced me to potential partners, but I didn't feel the same romantic spark I had in college with any of them.

I've always had high standards for relationships, and being persistent is my motto. I'm also quite passive in relationships; even if I like someone, I won't pursue them if they don't make the first move. So, I remained single for two years while working in Shanghai.

As I got older, my family started to get anxious, especially my mother, who always hoped I could settle down with a local Shanghainese. When I was 26, a friend introduced me to someone. This time, it wasn't a formal introduction; we just went out together. He was her boyfriend's friend, but everyone knew it was a meeting, though no one said it outright.

This man was a year older than me, a Shanghainese, had a good job in IT, and while not exactly handsome, he was of average height, polite, wore glasses, and spoke well, so my first impression of him was quite good.

After meeting him, he wasn't like those other men who rushed to ask me out, texting and calling me every day. That kind of behavior made me feel desperate, like I was going to take any woman.

He always timed things perfectly, occasionally inviting me out for dinner or a concert, and we always had a pleasant time together, so I readily accepted his invitations. Eventually, things progressed naturally, and we officially started dating. My parents were very satisfied with him. He was honest and reliable, had a good job, owned a house in Shanghai, and was decent-looking. He met all my parents' requirements.

Even better, his parents liked me too. It's not common for Shanghainese to marry someone from out of town, and fortunately, his parents were also intellectuals. Perhaps they saw my gentle and virtuous appearance, and my good education and job, so they also approved of our marriage. Come

to think of it, his conditions were quite good; what could I possibly be picky about? I'm not young anymore; did I expect romantic escapades? Besides, after a year of dating, he had a good character and treated me very well. Although our love wasn't passionate, it was warm and happy. Shouldn't I be content? So, under pressure from both sets of parents, we got married after a year of dating. I finally upheld my principles and gave myself completely to my husband. When he discovered I was still a virgin, he was deeply moved. Honestly, he never expected that a girl like me, with a decent appearance and figure, could remain a virgin at 26. He felt incredibly lucky and said he would treat me well for the rest of his life.

Our first year of marriage was generally very loving. He truly cared for me meticulously, and I loved him wholeheartedly. However, I still longed for a long-held wish: to study abroad. I had this desire since university. Back then, seeing my classmates go abroad filled me with envy, and I desperately wanted to see the world while I was young. But self-funded study abroad was too expensive. Although my family was relatively well-off, the annual cost of over 100,000 yuan was still a lot. Moreover, my parents felt that graduating from Shanghai Jiao Tong University and staying in Shanghai to work was already quite good; there was no need for a girl to necessarily go abroad. But after graduating, while working, I still attended New Oriental classes on weekends. New Oriental was full of people who wanted to study abroad, and in that atmosphere, my desire to study abroad grew stronger and stronger.

I finally scored 630 on the TOEFL and secretly applied to many graduate programs abroad without my husband's knowledge. To my surprise, I received offers, including a full scholarship from one university! I was so excited and immediately told my husband the news. Although I knew he wasn't keen on going abroad and didn't want me to go, I didn't want to give up the opportunity. I hoped he could study abroad with me and even planned to help him apply to schools. However, he said his career in Shanghai was going well and he didn't want to go abroad. My in-laws weren't happy either, and I was very disappointed.

A few days later, my husband told me that he had thought it over. Studying abroad had always been my dream, and he should support me, but for our future, he would stay in China to develop his career. He would earn money to support my studies. He even tried his best to persuade his parents.

To be honest, I was very grateful to my husband, but I didn't take a single penny from him. I felt that his understanding and consideration for me was already very precious, and I couldn't take his money for my studies. So, I took my savings from two years of work and went abroad alone.

Once abroad, I had a scholarship for tuition, and I supported myself by working part-time at a Chinese restaurant during my free time. I was also quite frugal, so I was financially independent and didn't need my husband's financial assistance.

After classes started, I met a girl named Fang. She was about my age and had also just come from China to study. The difference was that she and her husband had immigrated through skilled worker programs, but her husband was still working in China and wouldn't be able to join us for a while, so she came to study on her own.

Our situations were similar, so we got along well and started sharing a two-bedroom apartment. We cooked, ate, went shopping, and chatted together, so life wasn't boring.

We lived together for a year. My life during that year was simple: classes, part-time work, and chatting online and on the phone with my husband. Occasionally, Fang and I would go shopping or see a movie, but we never went to bars. But sometimes, especially late at night, I felt very lonely and missed my husband.

Although he often called and video-chatted with me, it didn't ease the pain of missing him. I went abroad for a year and returned home twice. I went back for two months during the summer vacation and for 20 days during Christmas. Whenever I had a holiday, I would go back to see my husband. My husband also said he missed me a lot.

We've been married for a year, and I didn't feel like I needed sex much. It was always my husband who initiated it, and as his wife, I felt I should comply. Although my husband often brought me to orgasm, I didn't particularly crave it myself. But after going abroad and seeing the sexual openness that is common in Western European countries, coupled with getting older and being separated from my husband for so long, I felt my sexual desire had increased considerably. Sometimes, in the quiet of the night, I would even think about it, and I thought about my husband too.

Once, we were video chatting, and my husband said he really wanted to, and asked me to take off my clothes so we could have sex on video. I understood my husband and felt sorry for him, so I did it. My husband said he was masturbating while looking at my body and even asked me to masturbate with him. Before this, I had never masturbated myself, and I didn't believe that masturbation could bring pleasure to a woman. I said no, just make him feel good, but my husband insisted. He made me start rubbing my genitals in front of the camera, and for my husband's sake, I started too.

My husband masturbated while teaching me how to do it, whispering sweet nothings and telling me to close my eyes and imagine us making love. Following his instructions, I slowly rubbed my genitals, imagining making love with him. Hearing his increasingly rapid breathing, I unconsciously rubbed my clitoris harder and actually orgasmed. It was the first time I'd known masturbation could bring a woman to orgasm.

My husband said he'd ejaculated too.

From then on, we often relied on video sex to satisfy each other's needs. I felt so pathetic.

But since I started masturbating, I often had the urge. Sometimes my husband was busy at work, and I couldn't reach him online. When I felt the urge, I would masturbate, lying in bed imagining making love with him, masturbating until I reached orgasm.

Despite this, I never considered having a one-night stand.

I never thought about casually having sex with other men.

It's not that no one pursued me; because my appearance wasn't particularly mature, many people couldn't tell I was 29 and didn't know I was married. A man I worked with at a Chinese restaurant before pursued me relentlessly.

Some boys in my class at school showed interest in me, but I rejected them all and told them I was already married. For over a year since I went abroad, my relationship with my husband has been great, and I never imagined I would betray him.

In January of this year, Fang said a college classmate of hers was changing jobs and would be moving from another city to our area. She asked Fang to find him an apartment, saying he seemed nice, and suggested we rent him our living room to save on rent.

I didn't object; I was usually away from home during the day with classes and work, and most of the time I was in my room at night, so the living room was just sitting empty. So he moved in.

His name is Feng, a year younger than me, with big eyes, tall, and a bit more muscular than my husband. He's already an immigrant and works at an accounting firm. Fang said he's a good person; he was on the basketball team in college, and many girls were infatuated with him.

However, I felt he wasn't very talkative, seemed very busy with work, and always left early and came home late. Sometimes Fang and I would cook and invite him to eat with us, but he rarely came out, often saying he'd already eaten out.

We didn't see each other very often, just a quick greeting and a few pleasantries when we did. Overall, I had a good impression of him; he was quiet, never brought friends home unnecessarily, and was quite clean. He would help with cleaning when he had time, and he didn't smoke, which was a great quality for a roommate.

So, the three of us lived together for about three months. Having another man in the house was definitely a plus; if a lightbulb broke or a screw came loose, the two of us women didn't have to climb up and down to fix it.

In April, Fang's husband finally came to visit, so Fang found another place to live with him.

We didn't want to rent to strangers, so he moved from the living room to Fang's original room. Since a friend of his was going back to China, we left him a sofa, a coffee table, a TV stand, a TV, a DVD player, and some other things. He said we could put these in the living room so his friend would have somewhere to sit, and we wouldn't rent out the living room.

After Fang moved out, we started living together. At first, it was a little awkward, since it was just the two of us. When friends come over, they sometimes jokingly ask, "Aren't you afraid to live alone with a man?"

I tell them it's not that serious. I've lived with him for a while and know him fairly well; he's not the kind of man with bad character who would do anything reckless.

Indeed, after we moved in together, things weren't much different. He still left early and came home late, and I rarely saw him when I was in class. When we did meet, we'd just chat briefly, mostly about his work and my studies. I never saw him trying to get close to me; he probably knows I'm a married woman and wouldn't be interested in me anymore.

Most of the time, he stayed in his room when he came home, and I stayed in mine; we rarely went out together. Occasionally, we'd cook and eat together on weekends, chatting casually for a bit, and after he washed the dishes, he'd go to his room.

He rarely even joked with me; maybe we weren't that close yet. We lived together like this for two months without any problems. I still video-chatted with my husband at night in my room, and sometimes I masturbated alone. But one day, two months later, something unexpected happened, and from then on, I fell into an incurable abyss…

In May, he said he was going on a business trip out of town for a week. For the first two days, I was a little scared, after all, I had never lived alone before. Although we usually went our separate ways at night, there was always someone else at home, and now it was suddenly quiet.

But after two days, I got used to it and thought living alone wasn't bad, quite free, I could do whatever I wanted. That week, I had just finished my midterms and was relatively free, so I rented some DVDs to watch at home. Since he wasn't home, I simply took them to the living room and played them on the DVD player. Watching on the big TV was much more enjoyable than on the computer. After watching those TVB dramas for two days, I got a little bored.

That night, I had arranged to video chat with my husband. When I was ready to go online and be intimate with him, I saw his message saying that he had to work overtime that day and couldn't be online with me, and he was very sorry.

I was incredibly disappointed, so I picked up an adult film and went to the living room to watch it. The more I watched, the more I wanted it. I was really into it, and I didn't want to go back to my room. I figured he wouldn't be back until the day after tomorrow, and I'd be home alone. So I lay on the sofa, watching the film while taking off all my clothes and starting to masturbate.

I lay naked on the sofa, eyes closed, imagining what it would feel like to have sex with my husband. I rubbed my labia, clitoris, and clitoral hood slowly, for 20 minutes, but I still hadn't reached orgasm.

When I first started masturbating, I could feel it in a few minutes, but as I did it more often, it became less effective. Several times before, when I video-chatted with my husband, I faked orgasms to please him, but I never actually came.

But today, I really wanted it, so I kept rubbing. Suddenly, the door opened, and Feng came home. The first thing he saw when he entered was the adult film playing on TV, and me lying naked on the sofa, eyes closed, masturbating with ecstasy.

He froze, standing there staring at me. I was suddenly startled and cried out, immediately covering my chest, utterly ashamed. He suddenly approached me and said,

"Do you really want it? Let me help you."

I called him shameless and told him to leave, but he didn't say anything and went back to his room.

I sat alone on the sofa for two minutes, stunned. Just as I was about to go back to my room, I unexpectedly saw Feng standing naked in front of my door, blocking my way.

He begged me to help him; he was so hard and uncomfortable. I looked down at his body and saw a huge, erect penis, bigger and thicker than my husband's. The red glans made my heart itch; this was the big cock I had longed for. I wanted it so badly, but reason told me I couldn't.

I still insisted on telling him no, that I couldn't betray my husband.

He said,

"I know you want it too. Let's comfort each other. I promise I won't go inside, so you won't betray your husband."

Looking at that big cock, I was a little tempted, but still hesitated.

He repeatedly assured me that he wouldn't penetrate me, that we'd just have some light sex, caress each other, and masturbate each other to orgasm. He said he was in so much pain and begged me to help him.

I finally relented, but made him swear he wouldn't penetrate me later.

So, on my bed, we began to make love, two hot, naked bodies embracing each other. I masturbated him, and he rubbed my thick, full labia majora.

But we both felt it wasn't enough. He suggested we give each other oral sex, saying it would be more intense. I refused. I've never given oral sex before, not even to my husband. How could I let another man do that? My husband has never licked my own penis either. Besides, I've always thought oral sex was dirty. I didn't agree.

He didn't force me, and we continued like that for a while. He said he still couldn't ejaculate and felt uncomfortably engorged. He asked if I could just tease the entrance of my vagina, promising not to go inside. I agreed—

he placed his large penis at the entrance of my vagina. It felt so hard and hot, wet and slippery. He rubbed against my labia, sometimes poking my already incredibly itchy vulva with the head of his penis, and occasionally flicking my labia majora with his penis. He kept rubbing around my vulva while sucking on my already erect nipples. I couldn't take it anymore—my vulva was so itchy, yet he still wouldn't ejaculate, and he was still so hard. He was really strong; his large penis was still clenching at the entrance of my vagina. I finally couldn't control myself and cried out to him,

"Put it in, I'm so itchy, please fuck me."

He suddenly entered me. My heart skipped a beat; I knew it was over—

"Honey, I'm so sorry, I betrayed you again..."

He thrust in and out, and I couldn't care less anymore, I was just enjoying it. The feeling was heavenly, the first time I'd ever felt sex so good, so comfortable. I had an orgasm, a really strong one.

He said he was going to ejaculate, and I quickly told him to pull out. We had agreed beforehand that he wouldn't go inside, and we hadn't used a condom. Luckily, he controlled himself well and pulled out, pouring his fluids onto my breasts. They were hot, so comfortable...

After the passion subsided, I cried. I said I had betrayed my husband, and I yelled at him,

"You lied to me, we agreed not to go inside!"

He said,

"I didn't mean to, I just couldn't control myself. I really wanted to go in, and besides, I saw you were in a lot of pain..."

He was right. I had asked him to have sex with me, and I had begged him to go inside several times. I was speechless.

But he still apologized to me many times, saying he would never do it again. After this incident, I felt extremely guilty. For several days, I didn't dare contact my husband or answer his calls.

I was filled with regret; how could I have let myself fall into such a state? Those few days, he tried to come home late as much as possible, and we barely saw each other; we were both deliberately avoiding each other. I was tormented for days, feeling I couldn't stay there any longer. I knew I would never forget this incident and would never be able to face him. So I hurriedly found a place online, and a week later, I moved out. He helped me move, without saying a word.

I moved to a foreigner's house; this time it was a house. The landlady was an elderly woman, a nice person, and there were a few other tenants.

I tried to keep myself busy every day, hoping to forget this incident as soon as possible.

At first, it was okay, but soon the lust in my heart began to gnaw at me like poisonous insects.

Once this happened, it happened again, a second time, a third time… When

people learned my story, many actually understood me, which made me even more ashamed. Because I hadn't restrained myself because of my distress and self-reproach, and with the indulgence of lust, I became increasingly uncontrollable.

Continuing my story…

It's been over a week since I moved to the old lady's house. I've tried my best not to think about these things, but I still can't control myself, especially at night. When I masturbate, I always think about the scene of having sex with Feng that day, and I masturbate while thinking about it.

Before, when I masturbated, I fantasized about having sex with my husband, but now all I can think about is that night with him. Even when I video chat with my husband, I think about having sex with Feng. I know it's wrong, but I don't know why, maybe it's because it's exciting. Only by imagining Feng penetrating me can I reach orgasm through masturbation. Now, video chatting with my husband doesn't work for me anymore. Every time, I can only pretend to satisfy him. But who will satisfy me? I'm getting more and more sexually frustrated, but I still resisted going to see him.

One night, two weeks after moving, Feng suddenly called me. I was very excited when I saw his phone and answered. His voice was low and choked as he said,

"I miss you, I miss you so much…"

He hesitated for a while, then asked if he could come see me.

I didn't give myself time to think and refused decisively. He hung up.

After hanging up the phone, I felt incredibly lost. I resorted to fantasizing about having sex with him and masturbating, but the pleasure from masturbation diminished. Another month passed like this. He didn't call me again, and we never saw each other again. I thought our relationship was over. ----------------------

Suddenly one day, Fang called me, saying it was her birthday that weekend and she planned to invite a few friends over to her house for a get-together, and also to see their new home.

Of course, Feng and I were also invited. I wasn't really keen on going, but it would be impolite not to go to Fang's birthday party. I figured it wouldn't hurt to go with so many people, so I agreed. When I arrived at Fang's house that day, I saw Feng. It had been over a month since I'd seen him, and seeing him again was a little awkward. Every time he looked at me, his eyes burned like fire, making me feel like I was standing naked in front of him—very unnatural.

Luckily, there were many people, so we didn't talk alone. We all ate together, then played cards, and the losers drank. Later, I saw it was getting late and remembered I had planned to go online with my husband over the weekend, so I said I had to leave. Feng said he was leaving too, and since he had a car, he offered to give me a ride home. I said no, I could take the bus. Fang and her husband disagreed, saying it was so late, and I had drunk a little, though not very drunk, but I was a bit dizzy, and they weren't comfortable letting me take the bus home alone.

Besides, it was raining heavily outside, so I couldn't insist any further and agreed to let Feng take me. The whole way, neither of us spoke. He drove, and I sat quietly, just hoping to get home quickly. Finally, we arrived at my doorstep. I said thank you and was about to get out of the car when Feng suddenly grabbed me, kissed me passionately, and grabbed my breasts forcefully.

He said he'd been craving me for a month, almost to the point of madness. Ignoring my resistance, he roughly tore open my clothes and sucked on my nipples. I finally couldn't take it anymore; I'd wanted to for a long time too. Under the influence of alcohol, I began to respond to his kisses, my hand involuntarily reaching for his penis, which was already bulging like a tent.

I finally pulled it out—the large penis I'd longed for countless nights, the one that had given me countless orgasms, was now hot and sticky. I held it in my hand.

He suddenly stopped, leaned close to my ear, and asked,

"Do you want it?"

I was already very wet, so I could only nod. He said,

"I'll satisfy you right away."

Then he drove to an empty parking lot behind my house and parked. I could only say to my husband in my heart,

"I'm sorry, my husband, I really can't take it anymore. Let me relax one more time, just one last time."

Midnight—we made love wildly in the car.

Outside, it was pouring rain, but inside we were drenched in sweat, our juices flowing freely.

Perhaps it was because it was my first time having sex with a man in a car, but it felt incredibly exciting and pleasurable. I discovered that I actually enjoyed stimulating sex. That night, we made love in the car for over two hours, and he brought me to orgasm three times in a row…

Just after my second orgasm, my husband's phone rang. I knew he was worried because I hadn't gone online yet, so I answered weakly. At that moment, Feng's thick penis was still inside me, deeply inserted in my hot vagina. My husband asked,

"Honey, what's wrong? I've been waiting for so long, why haven't you gone online?"

I nervously said,

"Honey, I have a bit of a cold, so I'm going to rest early."

My husband reassured me and told me to rest well and take care of myself.

While I was talking to him, Feng started thrusting slowly again. I couldn't take it anymore, and my breathing became rapid, so I hung up the phone immediately.

My husband's call didn't remind me to stop; instead, it aroused my pleasure even more.

After hanging up, Feng asked me,

"Was that your husband on the phone?"

I said, "Yes!"

He said,

"While you were talking to your husband on the phone, you had another man's penis inside you. Wasn't that great?"

Hearing him say that suddenly intensified my feelings. I felt incredibly lewd and started moaning. He noticed my reaction and continued,

"Your husband is watching you having sex with another man in the car. I'm going to fuck you right in front of your husband, fuck you to death..." As he spoke, he thrust his penis forcefully, causing my juices to flow uncontrollably... In

the quiet night, the only sound was the friction of our flesh. I lay on the car seat, wiggling my plump buttocks, and he continued,

"You look so gentle and virtuous on the outside, but I never expected you to be so lewd inside. You're so slutty, letting other men fuck you in the car behind your husband's back. Want me to fuck you?..."

For some reason, hearing these words aroused me. My husband never said these things when we made love before; I would at most make a few soft moans. Today, in the car, I actually enjoyed Feng calling me slutty, calling me a whore, and even begging him to fuck me hard, to fuck me to death.

I never thought I would say these things, but it was really exciting, so pleasurable that I was completely out of control. I had another orgasm, and Feng ejaculated too, this time inside me. He made me orgasm three times in two hours, and I was almost exhausted.

We lay there resting for a while, the back seat of the car was soaked with semen.

We finally sat up and straightened our clothes, both of us drenched in sweat.

I was embarrassed and eager to get out of the car, but Feng said he wanted to sit with me for a while. He said he knew I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight and would feel distressed and guilty, and he didn't want me to go home alone and overthink things, so

he offered to talk to me. We sat in his car and talked. This was our first real conversation. Before, our conversations were always casual and disjointed. After our last time we made love, he apologized to me many times and then went back to his room. After that, we avoided each other and didn't speak to each other at all.

Today, after our second time together, we actually started talking in the car.

I asked him what his impression of me was before. He said he thought I was a gentle and virtuous woman, probably quite intelligent, and likely had good grades. He often saw me explaining problems to Fang, but he absolutely had no ulterior motives towards me. He never had any romantic feelings for married women.

Besides, I was too bookish and not particularly attractive to him; he preferred more lively girls. Before he saw me masturbating, he hadn't paid much attention to me. But when he saw that scene, he was surprisingly aroused and even made love to me, something he hadn't expected. He regretted it afterwards, so he didn't stop me from moving.

But after I moved out, he said that every time he closed his eyes, he would think of me naked, lying on the sofa, masturbating with my eyes closed—it was so alluring.

I said, "You're not bad-looking, why don't you find a girlfriend?" He said he'd had a few before, but they broke up. He

'd only been in our city for a few months, and he was busy with work, so he hadn't looked for anyone. Besides, he's currently in the startup phase and isn't thinking about finding someone right now. He'd always thought he could live without

a woman. Although he knew he had a strong sex drive, he hadn't thought he needed that much sex before. But after that time with me, he experienced a pleasure he'd never felt before, saying he'd never felt that way with any of his previous girlfriends. He wondered if it was because I was someone else's wife that he found it so exciting.

He said that in the days after I moved out, he masturbated much more often, always imagining me naked, lying on the sofa, masturbating.

A few times he even lay down on the sofa in the living room where I used to lie to smell my scent.

One night, he couldn't hold back any longer—the night he called me. He really wanted to come see me, but I firmly refused. He also felt he shouldn't have those thoughts about me anymore.

So, for the first time in his life, he went to a prostitute. But when he actually went, looking at the prostitute, he said he felt nothing. He ultimately didn't do it. He said only seeing me gave him that strong desire, and only having sex with me could give him that kind of pleasure.

He frankly said, "I know you have a husband, and you love your husband very much. What we're doing is wrong. I'm not sure if I really love you. I can only say that I'm hopelessly infatuated with your body."

He said, "I can see you feel the same way. Although you're trying to control yourself, we can indeed satisfy each other. It's already lonely in a foreign country; why make yourself suffer? We're already like this, and I don't want to deliberately restrain myself anymore. Let's enjoy each day as it comes, and comfort each other when needed, okay?"

I remained silent. What he said resonated with me. I felt the same way, but the pangs of conscience prevented me from readily agreeing. We talked in the car until 3 a.m. When I got home and lay in bed, I couldn't sleep, tossing and turning. Feeling another man's fluids inside me, I even worried I might be pregnant. Thankfully, my period came, which relieved me.

After that, two sexual encounters, plus that deep conversation that night, made Feng and I much closer. He became more unrestrained, no longer calling to ask if I could come over, but instead just showing up at my door whenever he felt like it. And every time he came, we would definitely have sex. I couldn't resist him. In fact, if he didn't come, sometimes I would even think about it, but I never initiated it.

The following week, he came 3 or 4 times a week. He said he wanted to have sex with me whenever he saw me. The first few times he came to my house, he couldn't wait to strip me naked and have sex with me intensely as soon as he entered the room. Every time, we were very enthusiastic and satisfied.

Later, he sometimes came directly over after work to have dinner together. Ever since that time in the car when he discovered I liked him talking about my husband having sex with me, sometimes he would come to my house. I'd be cooking in the kitchen when my husband called. Whenever my husband called, if he was nearby, he'd start kissing me, touching me, and then slowly moving his hand down to my genitals. I'd try to appease him while pushing him away, but it was no use. He could always make me wet. I couldn't take it anymore, so I'd hang up, and then we'd have a wild time. I especially loved that feeling; the more I felt my inner lust, the more frenzied I became.

We continued to have passionate sex every few days, usually when he came to my house. Sometimes we'd do it in the bedroom, and while he was penetrating me, he'd say that my tenants probably knew he was coming to have sex with me, that they were all listening outside the door. The more he said that, the more excited I became, and so did he. But afterwards, whenever I ran into my mother-in-law or the tenants, I was afraid they might actually have heard, and I felt embarrassed. Another

month passed like this. Although I always refused him when he came, I always gave in. He suddenly stopped coming. He hasn't come for a week, and I can't take it anymore. Although I still video chat with my husband sometimes, it's just for show, just to satisfy him.

I can't even stand not having sex with him for a week, but I still resisted calling him. A few more days passed, and he still didn't come. I think he's probably tired of me. Well, that's fine, it can't go on like this forever.

I wanted to forget, but lust kept festering in my heart. I really wanted to go to his house to find him, but I held back. However, the weather was getting hotter and hotter. I had moved in a rush and hadn't brought many things with me; the fan was still in the old house. I don't know if I was making excuses for myself or what, but that night was really hot. I decided to go get the fan. I still had the key, so I didn't tell him and just went to get it myself. I thought if he really had lost interest in me, I would just take the fan and leave.

Besides, he might not even be home; maybe he'd found a suitable girl and gone on a date.

So I went over by myself. When I opened the door, the living room light was off. I thought he really wasn't home, and felt a pang of disappointment. I went into the storage cabinet to find a fan. After a while, I was suddenly hugged from behind. I turned around and saw Feng. He said, "You're finally here! I missed you so much!" and started kissing me. I pushed him away and said,

"You're home? What have you been doing these past few days?"

He smiled slyly and said,

"Did you miss me? Did you want me?"

I ignored him. He said,

"I deliberately didn't contact you these past few days. I wanted to see how long you could hold back. I'm always the one who initiates contact. It's like every time I go to your house, it's just to vent my frustrations on you. And you always resist a little, making me feel like a beast, like I'm forcing someone into prostitution. We're together because we need each other, it's mutual, isn't it?"

I said,

"I thought you had a girl you liked, that you had a girlfriend."

He smiled and said:

"After being with you, you're all I can think about. How could I possibly be interested in other women?"

he said, hugging me and starting to kiss me, unbuttoning my clothes, and taking them off. This time, I was very docile and cooperative. He led me into the bathroom, and we showered together. Then, for the first time, we did it again at his house, our old house.

This time, we performed oral sex on each other for the first time. It was my first time giving oral sex to a man, and it wasn't even my husband.

The feeling of oral sex was amazing; I actually really enjoyed it.

I greedily sucked on his large glans, and he licked my pussy, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly. We played 69, and after the climax, we were both hungry, so we went to the kitchen to get something to eat. After eating, I was planning to have him take me home, but he said we should be romantic and go to the balcony to look at the stars. So we got two deck chairs and sat on the balcony looking at the stars—

the moonlight was beautiful tonight. He looked at me and started kissing and hugging me. Gradually, our breathing became rapid again. I wanted to go back to the room, but Feng grabbed me, and we made love on the balcony under the open sky,

which excited me to the extreme again. With Feng, he always gave me different kinds of excitement. That night, I didn't go home. We spent the night together for the first time…

When I woke up the next morning, I inevitably had another round of lovemaking. We made love three times that night.

The next day, I was so weak and listless that I felt completely drained when I went to class. Feng said,

"I love seeing you exhausted and rolling your eyes when I fuck you. It makes me feel so satisfied and happy."

I told Feng,

"Let's be more moderate in the future. It's not good for your health if we do it too often."

He said,

"I can't help it, darling. As long as I'm with you, I have endless sexual desire. I just can't control it... If I don't see you for a day, I become sexually frustrated... It's all because of your sexiness and gentleness."

To be honest, I feel the same way, even a hundred or a thousand times stronger than Feng... We might be karmic enemies from a past life. Whenever we meet in this life, it's like dry tinder burning...

We've been maintaining this kind of sexual relationship for more than three months now. Every time we get together, we make love—

changing positions to satisfy me; front, back, standing, sitting, me leaning against the bathroom wall while he fucks me from behind. I especially love it when he stands on the floor, holding my big ass like a child, thrusting my pussy straight into his big penis and pumping up and down hard. My juices flow down his thick thighs...

His muscular body is so strong; he can hold my big ass and pump for over ten minutes without getting tired at all...

Being with him makes me feel more and more lewd. I even imitate the actresses in porn movies, sitting on Feng's glans, twisting my snow-white, plump, round ass and screaming wildly as I thrust back and forth—

whenever this happens, Feng makes me think about what my husband would think if he saw this scene. He keeps calling me a slut, a whore, which makes me even more frantic. We've done it in many places: my kitchen, the bathroom,

and once in a movie theater. There were very few people in the theater at night, and we were sitting in the last row. The movie was a bit R-rated. While watching, Feng kept touching me, and I started to get aroused. Feng made me sit on his lap. I was wearing a skirt, and he unbuttoned it, exposing his penis, and started having sex with me. That time was incredibly exciting.

Although I'm enjoying the pleasure sex brings me now, I'm still tormented by my conscience. I started making excuses about being busy with my studies and contacting my husband less. I

originally planned to go back to China for a month in August, but I said I had to stay here to study for the CA exam and couldn't go back…

My husband was very disappointed that I wasn't coming back for the summer. I don't dare go back to face him. I've already given up. If my husband knew all this, he definitely wouldn't forgive me.

I've thought about being honest with my husband and even considering divorce, but not for Feng.

I know there's no future with Feng. He's never said he'd marry me, and I've never asked. Maybe we're both still unsure if we truly love each other, or if we're just living abroad and experiencing sexual frustration, using each other's bodies to satisfy our physical needs.

I feel unworthy to be my husband's wife anymore. I remember being a pure virgin when I married him, and after two years abroad, I've become a slut. There

's no going back. I don't have the courage to tell my husband.

He'd go crazy if he knew all this. I know him too well…

I don't want him to suffer such pain and devastation. I don't know what to do.

I can only live one day at a time abroad. A woman must never take the first wrong step; once her defenses crumble, she'll only become more and more depraved.

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The Lustful Study Abroad Time of a Thirsty Young Woman

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