Why do women lose their libido at 40? I need an explanation. The saying "30 is like a wolf, 40 is like a tiger" is a lie.

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My wife hasn't been interested in sex for the past two to three months. When I try to have sex with her, she thinks it's pointless. She's a very decent, respectable woman with no bad habits. Her life revolves around work and home; after get off work, she helps the kids with their homework and plays on her phone, unless she takes the kids for a walk. She doesn't go out at night and has no other men outside the home. She's 40 this year, and I've only been with two men. Lately, she won't let me touch her; she gets annoyed if I even touch her. Sometimes when I try to cuddle her, she says she's too hot. I don't know if it's because of the hot weather, or if using some large toys has raised her threshold and made her lose interest in sex. With those toys, we only last 3-4 minutes each time, and then she won't let me continue, saying it's uncomfortable or a little painful. Then I have to go for another 10-15 minutes before it's over. She hasn't given me oral sex in a long time either; no matter how much I try to persuade her, she won't listen. She always has a toothache or a sore throat, making all sorts of excuses... Our recent dynamic is this: we have sex once before her period and once after it ends. After her period, she always allows me to use large toys on her – anal plugs, dildos (4cm diameter mushroom head), open-crotch stockings, vibrators, etc. When she's in a good mood, she'll take photos and videos without objection. But she doesn't allow me to use toys during regular sex. I really don't understand women's thinking. So, this time after her period each month is the time I look forward to the most, and it's the most satisfying for me. In the past year, she's had dinner with colleagues and drunk alcohol 2-3 times. Every time she comes home drunk, she gets very aroused and very proactive in sex. I can even enjoy deep throating, which is rare for her. When she's in my arms, she feels so soft and boneless. Normally, when I initiate, she's a little stiff.

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Why do women lose their libido at 40? I need an explanation. The saying "30 is like a wolf, 40 is like a tiger" is a lie.

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