Classic KFC ordering phrases – try not to laugh until you cry!

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1. A customer rushed in and went straight to the counter: "Miss, give me a Moscow chicken wrap." Me: "Sorry, we only have Mexican and Old Beijing styles." Customer: "...Then I'll have the Moscow one." Me: ...
Comment: Customer loyalty is quite high, but they just won't change.
2. A middle-aged woman came to order: "Give me a McDonald's." Me: "Sorry, we're at KFC." Woman: "Oh! Then give me a KFC." Me: Speechless, I turned around and left. I really didn't know what to say to her...
Comment: It's their first time eating here, they don't know that.
3. A customer walked up to the counter. Customer: "Give me a small bowl." Me: "Huh?" The customer pointed to the menu and I realized he wanted a sundae. Me: "A sundae, right? What flavor do you want?" Customer: "Apple." Me: "Huh? Sorry, we've never sold apple flavors." Customer: "What's that green one?" Me: "Oh, that's aloe vera flavor." Customer: "Aloe vera? Isn't that a flower? Can you eat it?" Me: "Yes!" Customer: "Never mind, I don't eat random things. I'll have coffee flavor." Me: (Confused) "Sorry, we've never sold coffee flavors either." Customer: "What's that black one?" Me: "That's chocolate." Customer: "Never mind, chocolate is too sweet, I'll have that red one. It's strawberry, right?" Me: (Super excited, guessed right this time.) "Yes, how many do you want?" Customer: "One, but I don't eat sesame seeds, could you pick out all the strawberry seeds for me?" I'm speechless!
Comment: This customer is clearly here to cause trouble.
4. An old lady came in and said very kindly, "Young lady, give me a pound of chicken wings."
Comment: Actually, KFC could consider selling by weight.
5. Once a child came in and said, "Give me 20 packets of ketchup." I said, "Little friend, we can't give you that many, and besides, what do you need so many for?" He said, "My mom said she's going to make me cherry pork tonight."
Comment: I guess this kid is a regular at KFC.
6. "Give me a torch." "Huh?" "The kind you hold in your hand."
Comment: It does look quite like a torch; consider changing the name.
7. A customer walked up to the counter. Customer: "I want a strawberry sundae." Me: "Okay, a strawberry sundae." Customer: "No, I want a strawberry sundae!" Me: "Hmm? Oh, McDonald's calls it a sundae, KFC calls it a sundae. They're the same thing, we're KFC here." Customer: "Oh, strawberry sundae, strawberry sundae, they're the same." Me: "Yes, sir, you're so smart!" Customer: "Hahahaha, then I'll have a chocolate sundae." I'm speechless!
Comment: I guess the waitress was so beautiful that the customer was overwhelmed.
8. One day, an old man swaggered in and went to the counter. He loudly proclaimed, "I want a 'Rape Chicken Popcorn'!"
Comment: If it were changed to "I want to rape popcorn chicken," the comedic effect would be even better.
9. Me: "Welcome!" Customer: "How big is the large bag of popcorn chicken?" Me: "This big." (Points to it) Customer: "And the medium one?" Me: "This big." (Points to it again) Customer: "Okay then, give me some mashed potatoes." Me: ...
Comment: I bet the waiter felt like punching him.
10. Waiter: "Welcome!" Customer: "Hurry up, I'm in a rush, I just need these." (Slams a bunch of coupons on the table) Waiter: "..." Customer: "Hurry up!" Waiter: "..." (Looking at the pile of McDonald's coupons, utterly speechless) Waiter: "Excuse me, sir, these are McDonald's coupons!" Customer: "Isn't this McDonald's?" (He remains calm) Waiter: "..."

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Classic KFC ordering phrases – try not to laugh until you cry!

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