A man who cheats on his wife feels 1

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November 20th, 2015—a day I can never forget! My wife and I were high school sweethearts, but for various reasons, we didn't end up together, and I got married. Later, I divorced her before marrying her.
My wife suffered a lot with me. During the time I was preparing for the divorce, she was constantly seen as a mistress. Due to the strong resistance to the divorce, we separated for a while. During that time, my wife spent three days with a man about 3-5 years younger than her. I found out later, but I still chose to divorce and be with her because I knew that didn't count as her cheating; perhaps more importantly, it was because I loved her!
We got married on the sixth day of the first lunar month of 2015. Our 13-year relationship finally culminated in marriage. The wedding was entirely organized by my wife's family; I didn't receive anything, not even a ring. I felt guilty, but I wanted to treat her well!
I've always had this thought because I've seen many women cheat, some with husbands who knew, some who didn't! So, I just hoped my wife wouldn't be emotionally unfaithful. As for physical intimacy, as long as she's happy, that's enough.
Our sex life is quite harmonious. Maybe it's because I've read too many novels, but I always wonder what it would be like if my wife cheated on me, but I'm also worried that she might change her mind. I've also thought about those scenes in novels, and sometimes during sex I think about finding another man for a threesome to make her more enjoyable. My wife always resists, and I haven't really tried to test the waters; it's just a fantasy! Sometimes my wife says she'd find a younger man if she wanted to have sex!
My wife is indeed very strong sexually; she likes continuous and forceful thrusting, and I always feel unsatisfied afterward. I usually want to have sex a second time! To be honest, I'm very confident in my sexual abilities.
Before, my wife probably suffered a lot of hardship and injustice. After we got married, she said she wanted to relax and didn't want to work, and I agreed. She then went to another city, about 300 kilometers away, since she has friends there, so I felt at ease. She basically just plays mahjong
every day there. I can visit her about three days a week for about half a year, and I'm relieved. In early November, I sensed a change in my wife, but I didn't immediately suspect infidelity. Instead, I sometimes thought she was just bored and having casual flirtations with other men.
Some things are hard to accept when they actually happen, even if you only think about them.
I felt something was wrong. I asked my wife to come home, and on the day she returned, she was taking a shower. I told her I had to go out, and while I was gone, I discovered she was cheating on me! My heart ached terribly. I knew this wasn't just infidelity; there was an emotional element involved. This was my wife's infidelity, a betrayal of our marriage!
Later, my wife confessed everything. I suppressed my anger and didn't touch her. I only had one request: we should separate and not contact each other. My wife was adamant about not separating. I thought my love had reached this point. I wouldn't do anything to her; I thought I should choose divorce. But my wife kept saying she still loved me and that it was just a feeling.
I also thought, "Forget it, let them be." During that time, I felt like a failure; I even lost the will to live!
My wife's resolute refusal to separate... This makes me want to see what kind of outstanding man could make her so willing to give herself to him. I've decided I want to meet such an outstanding man. I'm even willing to give my wife to him. I even have the perverted thought that my wife would enjoy a threesome even more.

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