Loneliness is the reason for saying "I love you": Summer rain, one night in Mianyang

page views:1 Publication date:2019-06-11

After graduating from university, I basically forgot all my literary skills. In Chengdu, this increasingly bustling steel jungle, my heart seemed to harden. The only thing that remained unchanged was that unforgettable figure after a few drinks. But life goes on, so I restrained my youthful exuberance and impetuousness, slowly becoming the kind of person everyone admires. With that came confusion, emptiness, and the loneliness of waking up suddenly in the dead of night. So, by chance, I joined Tianya (a Chinese online forum), registered for a long time but never posted or uploaded a picture. I just couldn't settle down to write; every stroke of my pen exuded restlessness. Today, finally, in a teahouse by the Jinjiang River, I typed out the following story. Meeting the female protagonist was also a Tianya connection. She was a newbie, and so was I. She added me, asking why? Because she thought my name was pleasing to the eye. People who frequent Tianya shouldn't dislike others, right? Okay, for the sake of a beautiful woman, I accepted. Yes, connections always begin with not disliking someone. Thanks to the trials of society and the training at work, and I almost forgot to thank my university professors for their guidance :( Our conversations were wide-ranging and varied, and after exchanging photos, we both liked them. So our communication, both verbal and written, became even more frequent. Finally, I was the one who brought up meeting up first. When I sent her messages like "I want to see you, I want to hug you, I want you," she didn't reply for a long time. Just when I thought that words couldn't overcome reality, she replied. She said she also wanted to see me, but she was actually suffering from severe depression. Due to family issues, in-law problems, and her husband's work separations after marriage, she was alone with her child every day and was on the verge of a breakdown. She couldn't talk to strangers and didn't want to talk to them either. She often has suicidal thoughts, and she registered for Shangleyuan by accident after the doctor told her she needed new friends and circles. She was afraid that if we met, she wouldn't be able to speak and I would regret it. No, I firmly typed those two words and sent them. Finally, I saw the message "Okay" on WeChat, but she said she hoped I would take the last bullet train so the baby would be asleep and she could stay with me. After agreeing on a time and place, I bought an 8 o'clock train ticket and 43 minutes later, I stepped onto the streets of Mianyang. My child is three years old, a time when it's hard to sleep, so she apologized and told me to find a teahouse to sit down, and to message me as soon as the baby was asleep. Therefore, I had plenty of... Time strolled across the crossroads, admiring the dazzling lights of this unfamiliar place. Clearly, fate wasn't welcoming to this outsider; a torrential downpour soaked my body, which I was prepared to lose that night. I secretly withdrew the middle finger I'd been about to raise, watching the wildly dancing lightning. After circling her apartment building for the third time, a message finally came: "The baby's asleep, come up." I smoothed my slightly disheveled hair and straightened up, heading towards the door. My circling had obviously aroused the security guard's suspicion, but considering I was carrying a bag of fruit and was soaking wet, he opened the door for me. Once I reached her door, I sent a sesame seed emoji, and the door opened. She peeked out with a radiant smile. Because of our shared language, there wasn't much awkwardness between us. Smiling, she accepted my fruit and then took a towel to dry my hair. Her full breasts swayed before my eyes as the towel was applied, and I shamelessly became aroused. I grabbed them with both hands, and she let out a soft moan as she sat on my lap. She quickly unbuttoned her nightgown and began sucking on one of my nipples. She whispered, "Gently, gently, I haven't done this in so long." My desire was instantly ignited. I grabbed her and pressed her down onto the living room sofa, only to realize I was completely soaked. Suppressing my rage, I said embarrassedly, "I'll take a shower first, I'm all wet." She, with a face full of... Her flushed face led me to the bathroom and turned on the hot water. After rinsing off, I opened the door to find her standing there with a towel, smiling sweetly. I couldn't help but swallow, and I pulled her into my arms, kissing her as I pulled away, kissing her as I retreated, until we reached the wall. Then, I pushed her down, and as I took her left breast into my mouth, my penis entered her. At that moment, words seemed so inappropriate; only the forceful penetration and trembling of my waist could best express my feelings. After ten minutes of frontal passion, we switched to a rear-entry position on the sofa. I gave her a quick lick with my tongue, and a stream of moisture flowed out. Using this lubrication, I penetrated her again. I thrust left and right, and just before climaxing, I grabbed her breasts. She turned her trembling head and kissed me, then I ejaculated deep within her, a continuous spurt and trembling eight times. Each tremor sent shivers down her spine. I think this is what complete sex is—interaction, communication, feeling, respect, and a touch of affection. Afterwards, I wiped her down with tissues, and after calming down, we kissed again under the shower, letting the pearly water droplets fall on our naked bodies. We washed each other thoroughly, touching each other's entire bodies. Then, as we dried ourselves and lay on the bed, we talked and talked, bringing back to life the topics we'd discussed online. When we got up, she gently started giving me oral sex, saying she was sorry I'd been soaked by the rain and had waited so long, and wanted to make it up to me. What could I say? I could only give it my all and get back to work. This time it lasted longer, and we tried various positions. Finally, she begged for mercy, saying her stomach hurt, and I didn't insist anymore, ejaculating quickly. Afterwards, we cleaned up and cuddled in bed again. I asked her, lying in my arms, "Do you regret it?" She said no, the timing was perfect. Yes, it's painful to love someone you can't have, but it's truly despicable to have them and not cherish them. So let's cherish this tonight. We whispered to each other for an hour before starting our third sexual encounter. This time... We moved to the balcony. She leaned against the windowsill, and I took her hard from behind. Our moans, loud in the dead of night, echoed through the darkness. The cars passing below left trails of color, and the scattered lights occasionally brushed against our panting faces. Finally, we climaxed, both of us limp on the cushions of the bay window. The next morning arrived with the beeping of the alarm clock at eight. Looking at her curled-up body sleeping beside me, I gently withdrew my arm. I had to rush back to Chengdu that morning for a company reception. She looked up and asked, "Will you come to see me again?" I said yes, as long as you still want to see me. After getting dressed, I closed the door and went downstairs, not daring to look into her lingering gaze…

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Loneliness is the reason for saying "I love you": Summer rain, one night in Mianyang

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