[Urban] Me and My Sister Wenwen (Complete) - 5

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Chapter 28.

After she returned to school that day, I started paying closer attention to her. When she started to go astray again, I quickly did everything I could to change her and prevent her from hurting herself like that.

I could sense that she still couldn't forgive what I had done to her. I didn't know what she was thinking at the time, and I never asked her. But I knew she didn't hate me. Because she never hurt me in return for what I had done to her.

Wenwen had always been this kind of girl—gentle, obedient, and well-behaved. I had never seen her hurt anyone or any small animals.

And because I knew Wenwen was such a good girl, I had always felt so guilty.

Many people say I'm just wallowing in self-pity, but you'll never know this feeling until you've experienced it yourself.

At first, I felt intense regret.

Regret for everything I had done to Wenwen.

Then, I felt fear .

Fear that she would get pregnant or tell everyone about me drugging and raping her.

Then, I felt relieved.

Relieved that she was alright and hadn't told her parents, teachers, or the police.

Finally, there was the longing…

At night at home, whenever I was in the living room, she would turn and head straight to her room, locking herself in. But I knew she couldn't hide in her room forever. Eventually, she came to the living room, sat at the far end of the sofa, furthest from me, turned the TV to her preferred program, and still wouldn't speak to me. It was

really awkward then, although I knew she didn't have much of a choice, but at least I knew that she would gradually stop rejecting sitting with me.

At first, I was truly grateful to have those warm moments with my sister again. But after that night's experience, I truly understood that my sister was, after all, a woman of flesh and blood, no different from any other woman. Gradually… I couldn't resist the longing to have her again, to feel the warmth and comfort of being enveloped in her small, cozy space… so I longed for that feeling again.

At that moment, I knew it was only a matter of time before I fell back into the fires of hell and became a demon again…

During that time, I kept an eye on Wenwen. She was originally a simple, quiet, and unassuming girl who never wore makeup, but after she learned that I had drugged and raped her, her clothing began to become more flamboyant, she would occasionally wear light makeup, and she

exuded a more mature and alluring charm. I don't know how to explain this phenomenon? Perhaps there's no explanation at all. Or perhaps people are right; to tell if a woman has sexual experience, you can look at her clothing, makeup, and demeanor.

I kept suppressing my desires, but I was powerless to resist letting my gaze wander over her curves again. From her neck to her breasts, from her breasts to her genitals, and recalling all her feelings that night…

I knew I still had half a bottle of the drug. But I also knew that it was a taboo I could never touch again. Wenwen had the opportunity to tell everyone what I had done, to destroy my life, but she didn't…

so I absolutely could not hurt her again. This was the only thing that allowed me to control my desires until the very end.

That day, I heard Wenwen coughing early in the morning. I thought it was just a minor cold, so I didn't pay much attention. When she came home that evening, her coughing became even more intense. I realized something was wrong and went to peek into her room. I saw her lying on the bed, her face slightly pale, looking pained and weak.

I was immediately terrified, truly terrified, because Wenwen had always been very healthy and I had never seen her suffer from any serious illness.

She immediately noticed me standing in front of her door, struggled to get up, and walked towards me with a slightly angry expression. I knew she wanted to close the door so I wouldn't see, so I rushed into her room and asked her with concern. I didn't expect that when she tried to answer me, her voice was so hoarse and broken that I could barely hear her.

At that moment, my heart ached, heartbroken that my sister and the woman I loved had become like this...

"Grandma Wenwen, do you have a cold? Is it serious? Are you alright?"

I remember she tried very hard to respond at first, but her voice was so hoarse that I couldn't understand her at all. After catching her breath, she repeated herself. Finally, I managed to understand what she was trying to say.

"...Get out...leave my room..."

At that moment, I was overwhelmed with mixed emotions, with sadness outweighing all else. She had the right to ask me to leave, and I should indeed leave her room. But seeing her like this, I couldn't just leave. Asking me to leave would be like asking me to cruelly abandon the woman I loved; how could I do such a thing?

"Does Grandma Wenwen have a fever?"

I ignored her and anxiously reached out to touch her forehead, but she forcefully slapped my hand away. From her anxious expression, I could tell she seemed to think I was going to take advantage of her. I ignored her and reached out my right hand again, but she still angrily blocked me with her hand. She tried to speak again, but I still couldn't understand her. So I said, "Wenwen, I just wanted to touch your forehead to see if you have a fever..."

She hesitated for a moment, then finally didn't slap me away, letting me place my hand on her forehead. But her eyes remained fixed on me, still wary.

When I touched her forehead, I knew she had a fever without even needing a thermometer.

"You have a fever! Have you seen a doctor?!"

she replied several times, but I still couldn't quite understand. It took me a while to understand that she was trying to tell me, "When I got home from school, I went to the pharmacy to buy some cold medicine." Then Wenwen started coughing violently again, probably because I kept asking her questions and she kept responding.

I wanted to ask her why she didn't ask to go home, but then I thought she must not want to see me, which was why she didn't want to come back so early...

She started to stagger backward, then painfully plopped back down on the edge of the bed. I've had a severe cold like this before, so I understand how painful it is. Although she had a fever, she felt cold all over and had a throbbing headache. She had a persistent cough, a stuffy nose, and felt completely weak; it truly felt like she was dying…

So I quickly ran to the refrigerator, grabbed an ice pack, and ran back to tell her to lie back in bed. But she just kept repeating that I should leave her room. I knew she was afraid I would take advantage of her again, so I immediately told her I wouldn't, that I was just concerned about her.

Honestly, seeing her so sick, I really didn't have any sexual desire to do anything to her. I don't know why, but all my desires seemed to vanish into thin air, just not resurfacing in my mind. All I really wanted was to take good care of her. After all, she's my sister, and the woman I love most. It

was really difficult; I talked and talked, and she must have been so weak and powerless, before I finally convinced her to lie back in bed.

That night, I stayed by her bedside, sitting on the floor, changing the cold towel on her forehead, trying to lower her temperature. She still seemed wary of me, so she didn't really want to close her eyes and rest.

I don't know when it started, but because I wanted to cheer her up, I began talking to her. Sometimes I told jokes, sometimes I said whatever came to mind, sometimes I echoed what I heard on the radio, and sometimes I talked about other happy things.

Those words were truly from the day I honestly told her what I had done to her; our conversations never reached the same level of intensity as those few hours that night…

Although I was the one doing all the talking, I was genuinely happy about it. It felt like the distance between us had disappeared after all this time. And I realized it was a great opportunity to get closer to her again, so I seized it immediately.

I kept telling her funny and cheerful things. At first, Wenwen ignored me coldly, but several times I saw her almost burst into laughter, only to quickly hide it.

Finally, she seemed about to laugh out loud, but she quickly suppressed it and yelled at me, trying to argue with me.

I knew she was probably yelling, "You're so noisy!" or "Get out of here!" But I pretended not to understand and smiled, saying, "What? Do you want to hear more funny things?" and continued telling jokes, which definitely made her both angry and amused.

I know her too well, probably better than she knows herself. Wenwen is naturally a cheerful and happy girl; before this period, I could say I had never seen her so melancholy and unhappy.

Although she pretended to be angry, I eventually made her smile and laugh out loud, as if she were releasing all the smiles she had been holding back. That was truly the most heartwarming moment of my life, and I felt as if I had found forgiveness in her laughter. Really, truly… a smile has an immense power to win hearts, and from that moment on, I never doubted it.

After laughing together for a while, we fell silent again. At that moment, I didn't know what to say and felt very awkward. Her eyes were probably fixed on the wallpaper pattern on the ceiling, staring at it, lost in thought. I could only take the wet towel from her forehead, put it in the basin of water beside me, re-wet it, and then put it back on her forehead.

Just then, unexpectedly, she broke the silence and asked me a question. At first, I told her I really didn't understand, and she turned to look at me, repeating herself to me in a weak voice. Finally, I understood what she wanted to say, and it caused me unspeakable pain once again…

“…Brother…why did you do that…”

I knew what she meant. She meant what I had done to her that night…

I didn’t respond. Honestly, I didn’t know how to respond…

I don’t know how long I remained silent, but my heart was filled with memories and emotions. There were feelings of pleasure, painful memories, desire for her body, and the fear of being conquered by that desire… During that time, I was constantly agonizing over: Did I love her, or her body?

I still had no answer, so I could only remain silent…

She must have seen that I wasn’t going to answer, so she asked me again. But looking into her gazing eyes, I knew I could never resist that expression. Gentle yet firm, as if it could see into the depths of my heart, where no secret could ever be hidden. I wanted to tell her: because I love Grandma. But then I immediately thought, I love her, but I also drugged and raped her—isn’t that a colossal lie? So all I could say to her was, "...Please forgive me, okay? I didn't really mean to hurt you...it's just...it's just..."

And then, there was nothing more to say. Wenwen didn't press me further, and I fell silent again, simply changing her towels.

After what seemed like an eternity, and given how late it was, Wenwen finally succumbed and closed her eyes to sleep. I turned off the light, leaving only the nightlight.

I was determined to care for her all night, so I kept myself alert and kept changing her towels. But eventually, I succumbed to sleep and drifted off to rest by her bedside...

But honestly, perhaps because I was worried about her, I didn't sleep very soundly, waking up every hour or half an hour to change her towels and check if her fever had subsided.

Then, I was awakened by a hoarse voice. Since I'd been a light sleeper all night, I immediately realized I'd fallen asleep by Wenwen's bedside and got up immediately.

In the dim light, I saw Wenwen sitting upright on the bed, sobbing…

Still half-asleep, I was terrified and quickly asked her what was wrong.

She didn't answer, but seeing I was awake, she wiped away her tears, trying to stop herself from crying.

I immediately knew she was having a nightmare again, just like when she was little. Suddenly, I felt that the little sister in front of me wasn't the one in her third year of junior high, but the cute, innocent little sister from when we were little. Back then, she

would always wake me up crying after a nightmare, needing my protection. Perhaps her mind has grown, perhaps her body has matured, but to me, Wenwen will always be like that little girl, always needing my protection and comfort… Still relying on my own hands? How can that be satisfying? Forum reputation guaranteed! 3D male masturbator anime virgin real sex toy highly realistic genital shape! Swallowing and spitting, irresistible! Click to enter.

At that time, I was heartbroken, and I really didn't think much. Just like when we were little, I climbed onto her bed, hugged her, comforted her, and told her not to be afraid anymore, that her brother would always be by her side.

Wenwen was really startled when I hugged her, and her body trembled in my arms, as if she wanted to resist me. But she didn't resist me. Instead, she let me hug her and lay back under the covers with my comfort. I also lay down on the bed next to her and continued to comfort her, telling her to sleep peacefully.

Finally, I didn't expect that she would take my hand and fall asleep peacefully...

Yes, at that time, I told myself that no matter what, she was still my sister, and I was her brother. Maybe she still hated me, but no one could ever replace each other's existence like this...

Chapter 29

That night, I lay on Wenwen's bed next to her. Just like when she was a child, after a terrifying nightmare, she sought reassurance and held my hand tightly, making me hesitant to pull my hand away for fear of waking her.

Looking at her serene face, I thought about many things, occasionally changing her damp towel.

It must have been past three in the morning when I, who had been struggling to stay awake through light sleep, finally collapsed, my eyelids becoming unusually heavy. I remember initially reminding myself not to sleep too soundly, hoping that would prevent me from falling into a deep sleep. But honestly, it was completely useless…

That night, I had many dreams. But they were all chaotic, illogical dreams. Sometimes I was walking on the street, sometimes chatting with friends, sometimes wandering aimlessly in an indoor space. No matter where I was, Wenwen appeared most frequently in my dreams that day. She quietly followed me, but in the dream, I didn't think much about it, nor did I consider how deeply I had hurt her; it was as if nothing had happened.

Then I remember dreaming that while strolling through a busy area, my hazy consciousness felt something moving beside me, waking me from my dream. At the time, I didn't think much of it, and since I'm a heavy sleeper, I planned to drift back to sleep without even opening my eyes.

But soon I felt another movement beside me, and my body was pushed a few times. Only

then did I open my eyes… I saw Wenwen tightly hugging me; she was awake, looking up at me with a bewildered and embarrassed expression. It was quite funny; for a moment I didn't realize what was happening, thinking I was still dreaming. It wasn't until a few seconds later that I suddenly realized I was hugging Wenwen tightly, just like I always do when I sleep with my blanket, and I even had one leg straddling hers.

At that moment, I was so scared my heart was pounding, my face must have turned pale, so I quickly let go of her and scrambled off the bed.

As guys know, my penis is completely erect when I first wake up. I couldn't even imagine if my erect penis had touched Wenwen while I was hugging her so tightly? Did she feel it?

She didn't say anything at the time. Wenwen just sat up in bed and coughed a few times. But I could tell it was much better than yesterday, which meant her cold was starting to get better. My biggest concern then was whether she still had a fever.

I had just woken up and hadn't considered that she might resist, so I just reached out my right hand. It wasn't until I touched her forehead, or even later, that I realized,

"...Grandma's fever's gone down."

Knowing that Wenwen's fever had subsided, I felt a huge sense of relief. But it was only after telling her that that I realized my throat was a little swollen and sore. I must have caught it from Wenwen; after all, I had been by her side all night, and even while she slept, I had her like a blanket. It was really hard not to catch it. But that's okay. As long as I get my medicine from the pharmacy before it gets worse, I should be able to recover early and not let it get as bad as Wenwen's.

Then I asked her where she kept her cold medicine. She told me in a hoarse voice that it was in her backpack. Then I turned on the ceiling light, checked the alarm clock to make sure it was around eight in the morning, and then I started rummaging through her schoolbag.

I still remember that moment vividly. Strictly speaking, I remember the scent. As soon as she opened her schoolbag, her signature fragrance wafted out. It wasn't perfume; it was a very natural scent, like Wenwen's natural fragrance, which I've always loved. I once casually asked a friend about a girl I liked who always had a unique, non-artificial fragrance, and he laughed and said it was the scent of female hormones. I think he was right, otherwise why would I have kept noticing her scent?

What happened next is really nothing special. I took out some cold medicine from her schoolbag, poured her a glass of water to take the medicine, and then ran to the living room to call Wenwen's middle school to ask for a sick leave. When I ran back to her room, I found her already in the bathroom, getting ready.

It was only then that I felt relieved about Wenwen's health... After all, she could walk to the bathroom by herself, which meant her condition was much better than yesterday...

I knocked on the bathroom door and asked if she wanted a hamburger or an egg pancake, and I would go outside to buy it for her. I had expected her to maintain her usual indifferent attitude and not respond, but to my surprise, she actually answered that she had no appetite.

I have to admit, I was really happy to hear her response. After all, for several weeks, she had been avoiding me because of what I had done to her.

And at that time, I never imagined that everything that happened that day, my concern for Wenwen, would change everything forever, and would also change our lives forever...

Chapter 30

After taking care of Wenwen that day, I never expected that she would slowly start to talk to me again, get closer to me, and even take the initiative to find me. I didn't know about her psychological change at that time, and I didn't ask her, because I knew that there was no need to ask...

Wenwen didn't really hate me; she just couldn't accept that I had done such a thing to her. But because of this, I found it even harder to forgive myself…

Perhaps it was an innate desire for sex, or perhaps desire truly is irresistible. When Wenwen leaned back against me, the desire that had been suppressed by regret slowly resurfaced.

Anyone with sexual experience knows that sexual desire cannot be satisfied by anything other than sex. At that moment, I longed for Wenwen's body again, her warm, moist vagina… At first, I could tell myself that I must never hurt her again. But as the days passed and the rift between us gradually healed, my longing grew even deeper.

Several times, I would inadvertently stand behind her, and the scent wafting from her would fill me with a desire to hold her tightly. I longed to embrace her, just like that night, to caress her curves with my hands, to hold her full breasts, to feel every pulse of her life.

Several times, when Wenwen was showering, I would unconsciously linger outside the bathroom door, with the urge to open it. I long to go back to my childhood, to use bath time as an excuse to explore her body, to freely examine her genitals,

and to share the secrets of our bodies. Many times, I had to suppress my desires, constantly crying out to the heavens: "Why must we be siblings? Why do we have such an unbreakable blood tie?" This is a pain that outsiders cannot understand, long and seemingly endless, tormenting me every day.

Many times, I also thanked the heavens for allowing Wenwen and me to be siblings, to meet in this world, and to live under the same roof every day. Otherwise, I would forever have to endure loneliness, to endure the days without her beauty by my side, and even lose her in my life, like strangers who would never meet again…

Sometimes, she would come to my room to borrow my computer. I would always lie on my bed under the covers, pretending to rest or sleep, secretly looking at Wenwen's body, recalling that night, and masturbating intensely, hoping to satisfy the desires in my heart.

But such satisfaction was always rare and empty. At that time, I knew that it was only a matter of time before I fell back into the hellish fire of desire…

I can't remember which day it was? All I know is that I finally succumbed to desire and quietly went to the laundry balcony behind the bathroom while she was showering. I was incredibly nervous; if Wenwen found out, she might not forgive me this time. I knew I shouldn't do this again, but I just couldn't resist, driven by desire as before.

I cautiously peeked in; the bathroom window wasn't fully closed, leaving about a third of the space open, with occasional wisps of steam escaping. I knew that if I was careful enough, I could still see Wenwen's naked body through the window, her completely exposed. But doing this, whether she found out or not, was hurting Wenwen… After

struggling for a while, I finally couldn't resist and leaned in. Little did I know, this would forever change my life…

At first, I was surprised that I couldn't see anything; it was as if the bathroom was empty, only the sound of running water could be heard. Then I stood on tiptoe and saw her sitting naked on the edge of the bathtub with her back to me, bending forward to wash her hair.

Wenwen had no idea I was peeking at her, and I could only see the curves of her back. In that tense and fearful state, I actually felt a slight sense of happiness and security.

Less than half a minute later, because of the temporary relief of not being discovered by Wenwen, my penis began to react, craving more stimulation and pleasure. I pulled my penis from my shorts and began to masturbate.

Secretly watching Wenwen's back, I fantasized again about everything that had happened that night, about all the sensations I felt with her body. It certainly couldn't compare to the sensations of vaginal penetration; it couldn't fully satisfy me, but at that moment I had no choice. Ultimately, I could only use this to release my desires.

In my mind, I imagined various versions of her: shy, open, orgasmic, passionate, walking with me towards the climax of sex. But all of this was ultimately a pathetic fantasy…

I finally reached my climax, ejaculating against the wall as if I were inside Wenwen's vagina.

After ejaculating, there was the emptiness and pain of having my desires satisfied…

Looking at the semen on the wall, I began to berate myself for doing such a thing. But every time I just blame myself like that, how many times have I actually managed to stop these behaviors?

Just then, Wenwen finished washing her hair and stood up, no longer sitting with her back to me. Looking at her again would only increase the chances of her noticing, so I quickly turned around, intending to silently run to get some toilet paper to wipe the semen off the wall before going back to my room. Unexpectedly, I didn't notice the small broom at my feet and kicked it over forcefully, making a loud noise as it fell to the ground.

I was startled, and only after seeing Wenwen immediately turn her head to look at me did I reflexively crouch down. At that moment, I didn't know if she had seen me. I hoped she hadn't. But that was just a hope… Then I could only try my best to be quiet as I ran and stumbled towards my room.

In my room, I listened intently to every sound coming from the bathroom. Besides worrying about Wenwen seeing me, I was also preoccupied with the semen on the wall. But there was nothing I could do; I could only hope the dimly lit balcony would prevent her from seeing it.

A few minutes later, Wenwen opened the bathroom door and came out. I heard her walk towards the back balcony. My heart pounded; I hoped she would just glance at me and leave. And indeed, she left in less than ten seconds, walking past my room and towards the living room.

I breathed a sigh of relief, but then she came back from the living room. I assumed she was going back to her own room, but instead, she walked up to my room, opened the door, and came in.

The moment she opened my door, I knew I was in deep trouble. It was like being struck by lightning; my ears rang, and I couldn't react.

Wenwen stood in my room, wearing that extra-long t-shirt, her hair still wet and not dried, and asked me expressionlessly, "You were peeking, weren't you? I saw your face.

"

At that moment, I had absolutely no idea how to respond. I could only accept my fate; I couldn't possibly answer her.

After a few seconds, Wenwen, probably realizing I wasn't going to answer, spoke up again, "Brother... why did you do that?"

When she asked me, I suddenly felt she wasn't really angry. Instead, it seemed she genuinely couldn't understand my actions, which was why she asked me that. And I didn't know what to say. I couldn't say anything at all, so I could only remain silent...

Later, Wenwen didn't say anything, turned around, and walked out.

I was alone in the room, my heart filled with mixed emotions once more. For the sake of desire, I had hurt Wenwen again, violated her body. No wonder the older generation often says that the most terrifying thing in the world is the endless desire of the human heart.

At that moment, I had a feeling I should go out with her and talk to Wenwen properly, let her know all my thoughts. I've always longed for Wenwen to understand my feelings, my pain, and my love for her. But I didn't know what would happen if I told her I loved her, so I was terrified, constantly terrified that if I told her, I would lose her forever. And that was the thing I couldn't accept the most; I couldn't lose her ever since I realized I loved her.

But I also knew that if I refused to face my feelings, I would destroy myself, and there would be no way to salvage it.

So, I followed Wenwen out...

past her room, I saw that it was dark, and the door wasn't closed, so she must be in the living room. But the TV wasn't on, the stereo wasn't on, everything was so silent...

For a moment, I was really confused, unsure whether she had gone out or was still in the living room? But because I hadn't heard the door open and close, she must be in the living room.

I went into the living room, and Wenwen was indeed sitting on the sofa. She looked at me, as if she knew I would follow her out. I looked at her, and she looked at me; neither of us spoke. Later, Wenwen broke the silence again, asking me, "Why do you keep doing this?"

Faced with her question again, at first I didn't know whether I should answer her, and even wanted to run away. But I finally spoke up and told her, "...Wenwen, do you remember the games we used to play when we were little?"

She simply nodded to indicate she remembered. After a while, I spoke again, "Back then, I was very curious about sex, so that's why..."

She didn't say anything, just listened quietly. But her reaction made me hesitate again, wanting to find an excuse for myself.

"I know it sounds strange...but because of me...I couldn't control myself..."

Wenwen remained silent, looking at me expressionlessly, as if she knew this was the excuse I always used.

Seeing her expression, I couldn't bear the inner conflict any longer. Later, I told myself I couldn't run away anymore, otherwise I would hurt Wenwen again like that night, and I would lose her forever.

"...Wenwen, I love you...because I really love you..."

When I finally told Wenwen my feelings, that moment felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my heart; the long-hidden secret was finally released.

I will never forget Wenwen's expression at that moment. I could tell she was slightly surprised and unsure how to respond. But I didn't need her response, because I knew things had come to this point, and I had no choice but to leave her.

"I'm sorry, Wenwen… I'll tell Mom and Dad I'm leaving this house. After I graduate this year, I'll move out on my own, and I might even join the army soon. Grandma, you can stay at Grandma's house then; Grandma will take care of you…"

At that moment, I truly understood this, because besides ruining my own life, I would also destroy Wenwen's life, which was something I absolutely didn't want to see. If I had to suffer, I'd rather suffer alone than see my beloved woman and sister's lives ruined because of me.

Then, I turned and left the living room, walking towards the hallway…

I first went to the back balcony to clean the semen off the wall, then returned to my room and closed the door.

That night, after that confession, my heart was unusually calm.

I didn't pay attention to Wenwen's voice in the living room; I just felt that my heart, which had been in turmoil for years, had finally found peace.

Lying in my bed, I was truly thinking that I might feel lonely and in pain in the future, but as long as Wenwen could walk the normal path of life she was meant to take, I was willing to bear any pain and loneliness alone.

Wenwen was, after all, just a third-year junior high school girl, not quite a child, but not quite an adult either. I couldn't just destroy her life like this. She still had her own life, a man who loved her, her own children, her own happy family… and that kind of life belonged to her…

Thinking of this, I couldn't help but shed tears. Perhaps my heart finally found peace, but I felt a strong sense of injustice and loss. Why did I fall in love with my own sister? Why couldn't siblings be together?

That night, I covered my face with the blanket and cried bitterly, never feeling so pain and loss before, hoping to find a way out of my pain. But I also knew I would never find it, and I knew it was a fact I could never change…

Chapter 31

I'm someone who dreams a lot when I sleep, but that time, when I cried myself to sleep, I didn't dream. I think it's because deep down I know I'm going to lose the woman I love forever, and all my future dreams will be shattered...

Someone once said, "People are great because of their dreams." But I can't see any dazzling light in front of me, only endless loneliness and pain.

“Tamar said, ‘My brother, do not defile me. This is not proper among the Israelites. Do not do this shameful thing. If you defile me, how will I cover my shame? You will also become a fool among Israel…

’ But Amnon would not listen to her. Because he was stronger than her, he defiled her and slept with her…

‘Your sisters, whether half-sisters or half-sisters, whether born at home or abroad, you must not defile them. In all these things, you must not defile yourselves. For in all these things the nations I have driven out of you have defiled themselves. Therefore I punish the land for its iniquity, and the land has vomited out its inhabitants. Whoever does any of these abominable things will be cut off from his people. Therefore keep my commandments, lest you follow those abominable customs that were practiced by your ancestors and defile yourselves.’”

Whenever I read these passages in the Bible, I feel a pang of unease. Isn’t this me back then? Me, full of sin?

But considering the ten or so minutes that passed, I didn't feel so much guilt; all I felt was an endless yearning for desire.

Why couldn't all of this be like the Egyptian myth: "Your sister Ithes has come. You rejoice, you love. You place her on top of you and enter into her. Ithes grows larger because of the child...

"

Perhaps, for me, this is the dream I will never wake from...

In a hazy state, there was no loud noise, no movement, just as if by telepathy, I slowly awoke.

At that time, I didn't know what time it was, only the silence, as if the world had returned to its most primal peace, the heavens and earth were silent, time and emotions had become illusory shadows, never truly existing.

Then, still half-awake, I heard a faint sound enter my ears, wave after wave, as if it were never-ending. I knew what that sound was; she was calling to me, seeking my protection and reliance.

I immediately got out of bed, went outside, and without hesitation went into Wenwen's room. I saw her sitting upright on her bed, tears still streaming down her face.

"…Wenwen, did you have another nightmare?"

She looked at me, a little surprised by my sudden appearance. I walked towards her, and she quickly wiped away her tears.

She didn't say anything to me, but looking at her, I knew she had calmed down, and there was nothing more I could do for her… Just as I was about to turn and leave, she suddenly broke the silence: "Brother… are you really leaving?"

Her sudden question completely stunned me. I looked at her, wondering what she was asking. Was it about seeing that she wasn't having nightmares anymore and that I was leaving? Or was it about my future departure? Whatever

she was asking, I knew that any answer would only remind me of a painful future, a future without her by my side.

So I didn't respond and was about to walk away again, but she spoke again, making me stop in my tracks…

"Since I was little, I've always dreamed of being alone in the dark, with nothing there… I can't find my father, I can't find my mother, and I can't find you… I'm so scared…"

Then, I saw tears welling up in Wenwen's eyes again, and she wiped them away with her hand.

For years, I didn't know what nightmares she had that made her so afraid. In that instant, I knew I had entered the depths of her heart, reaching the deepest fears she had harbored for so many years.

I wonder if there are siblings in this world as close as we are? Living together since childhood, as if forgotten by parents who only knew how to work, needing each other so much, so afraid of being abandoned, and so desperately needing each other's support?

Perhaps there are…

but no one has ever loved her like I have…

If this is an impossible dream, I hope the day I wake up never comes, so I can remain forever in her heart.

If this is my sin, my punishment, I hope the day it ends never comes, so I can love her to my heart's content.

But…

Chapter 32

I can't remember what time it was, whether it was drizzling outside that night.

I only remember Wenwen's tearful face …

Those who have never been lonely don't know the taste of loneliness.

Those who have never been betrayed don't know the taste of betrayal.

Those who have never been abandoned don't know the taste of abandonment.

I never knew that choosing to leave would cause her such pain…

“Brother…do you really have to leave?”

“Wenwen, Grandma doesn’t want me to leave?”

Then, we fell into another brief silence.

I didn’t know what to say, but my answer at that moment was affirmative. I had to leave her, otherwise, I didn’t know what else I might do to hurt her.

“I just don’t want you to leave!!”

That was her answer, so simple yet enough to cause me immense pain.

Seeing Wenwen’s sad tears, shed out of fear of being abandoned by me, I realized that love may be full of joy, but it often comes with pain. My love for her not only caused me pain but also hurt her in this way.

From childhood, exploring each other’s bodies, we had already embarked on this path of no return…

Therefore, I could only turn around, leave her room, ignore any calls she made to me, and walk towards my own room. But she quickly came out and entered my room as well.

At that time, I ignored her, simply turned off the light, and then lay down on my side under the covers with my back to her.

I always wanted to hold her tight, to share my love with her, to tell her my feelings for her. But I knew I couldn't respond to her, nor should I... There shouldn't be romantic love between siblings; this was my mistake, a wrong desire I couldn't resist.

In my dark room, neither of us spoke. After what seemed like an eternity of silence, I suddenly felt the blanket being pulled up, and the bed swayed slightly. Then I realized Wenwen was lying next to me. "

What is Grandma doing?!" I was a little startled by her sudden action, and I almost shouted it out. But I quickly realized she had just woken from a nightmare, a lonely one at that, and perhaps she just wanted me by her side...

But I never expected her to press against my back and wrap her arms around my waist.

"Brother... I remember all the games Grandma and I played when we were little... Sometimes I think about those things..."

I never expected Wenwen to suddenly talk to me about these things. For a moment, I was at a loss for words, as these things had always been a taboo subject for us.

"…Wenwen, now you should know I have to leave you…"

But after hearing what I said, Wenwen clung even tighter to my back under the covers. For a long time, we remained silent. Later, I decided to speak first, to let her understand: "Wenwen, do you understand why your brother has to leave? Your brother knows he will keep hurting you for his desires, so these past few years have been truly painful. That's why I have to leave you…"

"Brother, can't you really stay? I don't want to be alone anymore…"

"Wenwen… would you dare play those games with your brother like we did when we were kids?"

I asked her simply and directly, and Wenwen fell silent. Because at that moment, I believed she would accept this unchangeable fact, give up on letting me leave, and give us both a future we truly deserved.

Unexpectedly, after a few minutes of silence, I was already planning to send her back to her room, but silently, I felt her hand slowly move towards my shorts, and then slip inside my waist. Even through my underwear, Wenwen cupped my entire erection in her palm.

It had been over six years since I'd tried to force myself on her under the guise of playing a game in middle school; this was the first time she'd touched my genitals. But this time, I was more afraid. After all, I'd always explored her body without her knowledge, and she'd never been so proactive before.

"Wenwen…"

"…Brother, haven't you always liked me doing this to you…?"

Hearing her words, I was speechless. After all, I had always enjoyed letting her touch my genitals. I don't know why, but I just liked being held like this by her, feeling the warmth of her hand.

At that moment, I felt Wenwen actually taking the initiative to cover my penis, and I involuntarily began to get an erection. Although my underwear was covering it, it was still throbbing to its fullest extent. I knew Wenwen must have felt it, but she didn't make a sound or react at all; she just continued to cover it.

I could feel my desire being aroused little by little by her. I wanted more, I craved more, and since Wenwen was doing this to me willingly, even though I kept restraining myself, my desire was about to spiral out of control.

For a long time, since Wenwen grew up and became sensible, I could only imagine this moment in my fantasies, or use drugs to make her unconscious. Now she was truly awake and had come to my side willingly, with her hand covering my genitals.

So, I reached out and pulled my pants down to my knees, then grabbed her hand covering my underwear and used my other hand to pull down my own underwear, revealing my fully erect penis under the covers.

I held her hand and guided her to hold my penis. At first, she hesitated, but she quickly opened her hand and grasped it.

That feeling was what shattered my reason, filling me once again with an insatiable, hellish desire.

Almost instinctively, I wanted to turn to face her, but Wenwen pressed down on me from behind, blocking my way: "Brother, no... don't turn around..."

Hearing the slight fear in her voice, I knew then that Wenwen was afraid I would turn to face her. Because we both knew that in this situation, I might take advantage of the situation and do something more, instead of just letting her hold my penis. So, I could only remain silent and continue as before.

However, she really didn't know anything; she just quietly held my penis, without much pleasure. Perhaps Wenwen had masturbated herself before, but she certainly had no experience helping a boy masturbate. So, after some struggle, I boldly asked her hand to stroke and masturbate me.

At first, she didn't know why I wanted her to do this, and hesitantly let her hand slowly move up and down my penis, causing the foreskin to rub against the glans. In

that instant, I immediately felt the pleasure of masturbation, and knowing that Wenwen was doing it with her hand made me even more aroused.

As Wenwen continued her ministrations, my last shred of reason slowly crumbled, and all I wanted was to fully savor the pleasure. But because she didn't understand, and because I hadn't responded, she stopped after a short while. I immediately urged her to continue, not to stop, and she continued stroking me.

Occasionally, she would pause to rest, probably because her hand was tired, before resuming her stroking.

My feelings at that moment were strangely complex. I felt the pleasure from her, yet also a slight unease and guilt, but I desperately wanted the sensation to continue. My

mind was filled with images of her vagina, all the wet, warm sensations of that night, and I imagined myself experiencing them again.

About ten minutes later, I was about to climax and ejaculate. I should stop, otherwise I'd stain the sheets and blankets. But for me at that moment, the desire to ejaculate under Wenwen's ministrations outweighed all my worries. After all, if I stopped, I really didn't know if Wenwen would be willing to masturbate me so easily again.

My heart pounded like a drum, pounding against my chest, as if urging on all my desires.

Finally, after reaching the climax, I began to ejaculate, violently, as if the blood in my veins were responding.

Around the moment of ejaculation, I felt Wenwen try to let go of my hand. She must have felt the unusually intense throbbing of my penis due to ejaculation, hence her surprised attempt to release her grip.

But I immediately placed my palm on hers, using the movement to guide her hand to help me continue this final stage of masturbation; otherwise, the ejaculation would abruptly stop, as if it had run out of steam.

I don't know how long it took, but after the ejaculation ended, reason slowly returned from the intensely satisfying climax.

Then, I released her hand, and Wenwen's hand holding my penis also loosened. I then tried to sit up, but Wenwen, still confused, told me not to move. So all I could do was answer her clearly, "It's okay... I've already ejaculated..."

I believe she only realized at this point that her stroking of my penis with her hand was actually helping me masturbate. Then she stopped pressing down on me from behind, allowing me to turn around, lift the covers, and sit up.

At that moment, the pungent smell of semen immediately filled the entire room, mingling with Wenwen's fragrance. I knew Wenwen must have smelled the semen too, but I dared not delve into her feelings or thoughts, just as she wouldn't bring it up if I didn't.

I turned and turned on the small nightlight on the bedside table next to Wenwen, and my room was bright again. Besides Wenwen's slightly bewildered expression, I also saw the semen stains on the sheets.

Looking at the semen stains on the sheets, I felt an even deeper sense of guilt. I had actually done something so immoral with my sister, and I felt terribly guilty about it.

I turned to look at Wenwen, who was sitting up behind me. She silently watched my penis begin to soften and the semen appear. Then, noticing me watching, she looked back at me. I believe this was the first time in several years that she had seen my fully grown penis with her own eyes…

I will always remember the look in Wenwen's eyes at that moment, a mixture of fear and helplessness, unsure how to handle the situation.

“Wenwen, your hands are covered in semen…”

I looked at her right hand; sure enough, there were strands of semi-solidified semen between her fingers. She looked at the semen on her hands, completely at a loss.

“…It’s okay, go wash it off in the bathroom…and then get some toilet paper for your brother.”

Then, she silently left my bed and went to the bathroom.

That night, there was nothing more to say…

She brought back the toilet paper, stood quietly by the bed watching me clean myself, and then went back to her room. We didn’t speak again, and I didn’t dare look at her again. Because every time I looked at her, I felt the pangs of my conscience…

Chapter 33.

I remember clearly not closing my eyes for several hours that night until dawn. I had no idea things would turn out that way, and I couldn't believe I had actually ejaculated on my sister's hand while she was masturbating, and then wiped the semen off the sheets in front of her afterwards.

I didn't know what Wenwen was thinking, or if it would have a significant impact on her. Although she knew she had been drugged and raped by me, I was certain that because she had no memory or feeling of having sex with me, sex was still just a vague impression for her. But I believed that having her help me masturbate and watch me clean up the semen would have a considerable impact on her.

In any case, I was even more certain that I had to leave Wenwen. After all, this situation was so abnormal, and anyone could understand without me saying it… But putting it another way, for me, a student without a strong financial foundation, moving out and becoming independent was not an easy task. So all I could do was, as always, passively try to restrain my desires...

During that time, because of many feelings and reasons that don't need further explanation, I avoided meeting Wenwen. Because I really didn't know how to react when I saw her... Occasionally we would bump into each other in the hallway at home, and neither of us would say anything, but there was just an awkwardness between us.

For the first few days, I didn't have a strong sexual desire; I felt a calm, almost satisfied feeling. But gradually, as if energy was being stored up, I began to crave sexual desire again. The first few times, I took care of it myself, but that wasn't enough. I knew in my heart that Wenwen was right beside me…

but I didn't know how she would react if I went to her again. After all, that night I had given her that opportunity because I said I was leaving her and she had a nightmare. So I struggled and thought about it nervously for a long time, but in the end, I decided to go to her first and see how it went. If it didn't work out, there was nothing I could do. I also kept telling myself that if she was willing, it was just about her being like that day; as long as I didn't really hurt her, it would be fine.

That night, I waited until about 10:30, then nervously went to Wenwen's door. I knocked and waited for her to answer before opening the door and going in. She had changed into her extra-long t-shirt pajamas and was sitting at her desk doing her schoolwork. She was probably going to sleep after finishing her homework.

She looked at me silently, and I really didn't know how to start. I walked over to her bed and sat on the edge, looking at her. I remember feeling really nervous and scared at that moment. After all, I really couldn't bring myself to ask Wenwen to help me masturbate. Wenwen just looked at me without saying anything, as if waiting for me to speak.

We seemed to remain silent for a few minutes before I decided to start by asking about small things and see how things went.

"Are you doing your homework?"

She simply answered with a "hmm."

"Are you almost done?"

I asked her again, and Wenwen simply answered with another "hmm."

"Then let's finish first, and then I'll tell you..."

After I said that, she glanced at me again, then turned back to continue her homework.

Looking at her back, smelling her fragrance, and seeing her curves faintly visible, my desire grew even stronger. My penis began to react, gradually growing larger, and my heart pounded faster as well, as if I were pouring all my desires into my lower body.

I won't deny that I was making a final struggle. I should have stopped there; I shouldn't have dared to ask my sister to help me masturbate. Because today's situation was completely different from that night, I might have frightened her and caused many terrible and unimaginable consequences. But looking at her, I couldn't help but admit that deep down I wanted her, very strongly, craving every part of her to quell my hellish burning desire.

About ten minutes later, I noticed she closed her book and put her pen into her cloth-bag-like pencil case, and another wave of tension rose in my heart.

She turned around, and to my surprise, she spoke first: "Brother, what do you want to tell me?"

Her sudden question made me want to back down. But after struggling in silence for a while, I still didn't know what to say, so I simply got to the point.

"…Wenwen…Grandma, can you sit next to me?"

"…What do you want to do?"

"…Wenwen…Grandma, do you remember that night…?"

I believe she was taken aback by my direct question and didn't know how to respond for a moment. I saw a slight surprise on her face. After she recovered slightly, I immediately said, "Wenwen, how about Grandma helps brother do it again like that night?"

I remember her face immediately showing a look of helplessness, mixed with worry. Seeing this expression, I immediately realized that if I didn't reassure her, she definitely wouldn't agree in the end, and it would be even more awkward to meet her in the future.

"Wenwen, brother won't do anything to Grandma! Really! I just want Grandma to help me one more time!"

Then I nervously kept comforting her, saying nice things to her.

After several minutes, she finally hesitantly said, "…Brother, just this once…"

When I heard her say yes, I was so happy I felt like I was floating. Although she said she was only willing to help me masturbate one more time, I really didn't care about anything else at the time. Men understand that when lust is at its peak, everything else is secondary.

I was excitedly telling her I needed to go to the bathroom, and asked her to wait while I went. Actually, I was going to get toilet paper so I could use it to cover my glans when I was about to ejaculate, preventing stains on my clothes or the floor.

I grabbed several sheets and excitedly walked out of the bathroom, only to see Wenwen walking towards my room in the hallway. I immediately knew she didn't want me to dirty her room, which was why she was coming to mine.

I followed her into my room, my penis already rock hard. Inside, Wenwen stood by the bed, looking at me awkwardly. Seeing the toilet paper in my hand, I also looked at her awkwardly for a moment before looking away.

I sat on the edge of my bed, and she still seemed uneasy. I asked her to sit beside me. After a brief silence, she finally came over and sat down next to me.

At that moment, I couldn't believe that Wenwen would actually be sober and willingly help me masturbate. After all, this was a different situation from that night; there was no threat to her, and she was completely willing only after I kept begging her.

We were both sitting on the edge of the bed, with her sitting next to me. Just as I was about to take off my pants, she called out to me, "...Brother, wait!"

Startled by her call, I stopped and looked at her. I thought she had changed her mind, so I panicked. It felt like losing a piece of meat that was almost in my mouth; I suddenly didn't know what to do and felt a slight sense of frustration.

But then she immediately told me, "You go under the covers first..."

I realized that she was still afraid I would suddenly violate her, so she was pressing down on me from behind, just like that night, preventing me from moving freely. And she was probably also acting out of girlish modesty, not wanting to see my penis.

Whatever the reason, I looked at her, struggled for a while, and finally could only lie down on the bed and crawl under the covers. Wenwen followed me under the covers and, just like that night, pressed tightly against my back. I could feel her full breasts pressing against my back, and the pounding of her heart.

I took off my pants under the covers, then my underwear, and told her I was done. She reached out her right hand and, guided by me, grasped my penis again. The tension and excitement were incomparable to masturbation alone.

This time, without my guidance, she started stroking it herself.

I don't know how to explain it; perhaps she didn't understand these things, and being naturally delicate, her hand wasn't very strong, and her stroking speed was slow. If she knew more about male masturbation, she might have been faster, allowing me to ejaculate sooner.

With her stroking, sometimes my penis would twitch uncontrollably, as if my desire was being satisfied little by little. I suddenly had a feeling that perhaps this was wrong, but I also truly felt happy because of it. I wished she could help me masturbate forever like this…

“…Brother…why do you always like this?”

I remember vividly how she suddenly broke the silence and asked me this a few minutes after she started helping me masturbate. At first, I really didn’t know how to respond to her question. Wanting to do this because I love her didn’t make sense. And in principle, masturbation is about achieving sexual satisfaction. I thought about it for a while, and then decided to just tell her directly.

“Wenwen, I don’t know how girls feel about this. But for guys, the pleasure of orgasm is really good. I don’t know how to describe it, it just feels so good… Do you remember the games we played when we were little? Even though we were just kids, I already felt pleasure back then, which is why I kept playing with you…”

She remained silent for a while after I finished speaking. I thought she wouldn’t say anything more, but unexpectedly she asked me this question: “…Are you feeling good now?”

As she asked me this, her hands continued to stroke my penis up and down, and my penis would instinctively twitch, giving me an indescribable and wonderful sense of satisfaction. In that instant, I felt the distance between us seemed to have shortened considerably, and the barrier disappeared…

“…Wenwen…I love you…I’ve loved you for years, but I’ve never dared to say it, just because we’re siblings…Can you understand my pain?”

I confessed to her again, telling her how much I loved her, but she remained silent. Actually, she didn't need to answer me. Just knowing that I truly felt that was enough...

In those last few minutes, I kept imagining myself making love to her, thrusting into her wet vagina. I knew I was about to climax, so I told her, "Wenwen, move your hand faster, I'm going to ejaculate."

She then made her hand move my penis faster, and I held a tissue in front of my glans to prevent the ejaculation from staining the sheets.

At that moment, my mind went blank. I only felt my heart pounding, and my penis throbbed more frequently, feeling a tingling, numb, and intensely pleasurable sensation deep inside. I kept holding back, not wanting to ejaculate so quickly. But sometimes the urge to ejaculate is almost impossible to completely control.

It felt like a long time, but it probably only lasted about ten seconds. I kept teetering on the edge of orgasm, holding back, and finally, I couldn't hold back anymore. My mind was filled with the thought of ejaculation and her image. I called out Wenwen's name and violently ejaculated.

My penis throbbed violently in her hand, then gushed out a torrent of hot semen. I must admit, I'd never experienced such an orgasm since that night I drugged and raped her; it was an intense release, as if the semen was draining the very essence of my life.

It lasted for several seconds before my ejaculation finally stopped and my penis began to soften and shrink. But I was genuinely tired, and my heart was still pounding, so I didn't do anything else for the time being. Wenwen, after that intense throbbing of my penis, must have known I'd ejaculated. She released me, then left my room without saying a word, lifting the covers and heading towards the bathroom. She must have gone to wash her hands; after all, her hands would inevitably have some of my semen on them…

A few minutes later, after hearing Wenwen return to her room, I also lifted the covers and sat up to check the sheets for any semen. Sure enough, there was still some on them; after all, the orgasm had been so intense, it was impossible for me to only ejaculate the usual amount.

I first took the wad of toilet paper soaked in semen to the toilet and threw it in. Then I washed my now-shrunken penis, grabbed a few sheets of toilet paper, and went back to my room to wipe myself, and put my pants back on.

At that moment, I was still experiencing a multitude of conflicting emotions, but this time, there was a new kind of happiness. It was as if I had finally confessed something that had been bottled up inside me to the person I had always secretly loved—a feeling of blissful relief.

Finally, I went to Wenwen's room and, peeking through the crack in the door, saw that she had already turned off the light; she must be going to sleep. But I still knocked on her door…

“What is it?”

“Wenwen, I just wanted to tell Grandma… thank you, goodnight…”

That night, for me, was truly an indescribable, blissful night…

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