(3p) If I had the chance, I would love you again.

page views:1 Publication date:2013-09-19

My thoughts drift back to a day after National Day in 2008. We were leaning on the balcony, watching classmates come and go below, chatting about basketball, Nokia phones, and girls… A fleeting glance—I'm still grateful for that moment to this day—that's when I saw her at her most beautiful. A red, fitted sweater, long hair flowing freely behind her. Yes, I was captivated; that moment is etched in my memory. Then began my courtship. Looking back now, I was so naive. It lasted for half a year. I believe I was finally moved by my persistent pursuit. On Valentine's Day in 2009, she agreed to be my girlfriend. I was so excited I couldn't sleep all night. At that time, she was like a little princess, delicate, cute, and a little mischievous. I remember clearly the first time I saw her cry was because of her younger sister, hiding alone at the stairwell of the gym during evening self-study. It broke my heart. I silently vowed to myself that I would cherish her and never let her suffer any more injustice. Actually, we were quite timid back then. She wouldn't let me hold her hand when we ate out, went shopping, or played, afraid of being seen by acquaintances or family. She would always look at me with those innocent little eyes, and my heart would melt. Writing this, I can't help but smile. That time was truly beautiful and unforgettable. In the blink of an eye, we were in our second year of high school. Our classmates and friends envied us; our mutual consideration and understanding made our relationship increasingly close. Until one day in the second semester, we argued over a small matter. It was a fierce argument, and neither of us would back down. She cried, and I stormed off, not going to school for a week. This was our first argument, and the first time I brought up breaking up. Our friends tried to comfort me, but I still left, going to Zhuhai with two friends to start my working life. Most young people had worked on assembly lines; it was incredibly tiring. Every day, I would work overtime until late at night, dragging my exhausted body back to the dormitory, collapsing into bed and falling asleep immediately. During those days without family around, I missed them terribly, and I missed her too. But I couldn't muster the courage to call her. She, on the other hand, would sometimes secretly ask my friends about me, and secretly visit my QQ space before deleting her visit history. I worked for about three months, but couldn't keep it up and went back to school. By then, I was almost a senior in high school. Holding my phone, I hesitated for a long time before finally dialing the number I knew by heart. After the call connected, we agreed to meet at our usual spot. She had changed; she was more mature and gentler than before. Her first words were, "You finally decided to come see me?" I could hear the resentment in her voice (200 words omitted here, I forgot what she said), but she still forgave me. Entering senior year, the atmosphere of studying became noticeably more intense, but it didn't affect our relationship. Our friends broke up and got back together, and we became one of the few couples left in our circle. I felt very lucky and happy. As the college entrance exam approached, she started making plans for us. Through family arrangements, she planned to study at a university in Beijing after the exam. Her family knew about her and hoped we could go to university in Beijing together. Our ideal was beautiful, but reality was harsh. Ultimately, we couldn't stay together. We separated less than 20 days before the exam. I was emotionally unstable and finished the exam in a daze. Unwilling to accept it, I tried to contact her several times, but she refused to see me. It was very regrettable. With a heavy heart, I prepared to go to Beijing. My family told me that giving someone a jade Buddha is to ward off misfortune. Naively, without thinking too much, I bought a jade Buddha from a friend's shop and asked my friend to give it to her. (To be continued)

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(3p) If I had the chance, I would love you again.

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