Unable to understand his wife's behavior

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

I don't know how many people have actually read Ms. Li Yinhe's writings.

There's a constant barrage of criticism against her online. I've read many articles attacking her, most criticizing her for disrupting marriages or family stability.

Everyone presents themselves as pure and noble Confucian gentlemen, praising the beauty of marriage while completely rejecting Li Yinhe and her professional views from a moral standpoint.

Many believe that both men and women should be absolutely faithful to their spouses and remain faithful until death.

-- Here I declare that I completely agree with this view.

However, reality and ideals often differ.

Humans are complex, and this complexity stems from the complexity of human nature.

Human nature isn't entirely good; it also contains evil, and even more ambiguous elements that exist in the gray area between good and evil.

For example, I still don't consider myself a bad person, but is it really so easy to distinguish between good and bad? When I betrayed my wife, to her, I was an absolute villain.

But faced with the reality that I had become a villain, did my wife stab me? Or should one resolutely abandon the marriage? Is it a rational attempt to salvage it, or a complete rejection? I think every wise person would not choose to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

I've always been very confused by a crucial point held by those who vehemently criticize Li Yinhe: they believe that extramarital affairs are normal, as long as one is careful and doesn't let their spouse find out—it's a kind of benevolent deception.

I think if this idea were accepted by most people, how terrifying would the world be?

When faced with a wife's or husband's solemn vows, would you wonder: is his or her declaration also a benevolent deception? As a husband, put yourself in her shoes: if your wife has been unfaithful, but she's hiding it well, so you don't know, would

n't you consider this behavior abnormal? As a husband or wife, when faced with "open communication" and a flawless so-called "benevolent deception," which would you choose? If it were me, I would choose open communication.

Compared to unwavering fidelity, betrayal is wrong, but a greater mistake than betrayal is deception.

The most heartbreaking aspect of betrayal by a spouse isn't the physical separation, but the emotional estrangement.

The devastating blow comes when you suddenly discover that the person you trusted most has been deceiving you all along.

Many of Li Yinhe's articles help us recognize this more clearly. Therefore, those who vehemently criticize Li Yinhe are not so much rejecting her as they are refusing to wake up, refusing to escape the quagmire of self-deception.

Every married person understands this: marriage is a partnership, a joint effort.

Many things cannot be changed by wishful thinking.

For example, my wife was always a devoted wife and mother, virtuous and kind, yet I still cheated on her.

Many aspects of human nature are unavoidable.

If you don't want to deceive yourself, you must bravely face them.

My wife and I finally got back on track.

It seemed that only then did we truly begin to love each other.

The intimacy, especially the emotional connection, is indescribable.

Gradually, my wife developed a habit: no matter what happened at work or outside, she would tell me everything. She'd ask for my advice on her troubles and share her joys with me.

Each time, I listened attentively.

Many times, my wife lay in my arms and said emotionally, "Honey, even if we're no longer husband and wife, I believe we'll still be best friends." -- For a man, these simple words are more precious than ten thousand "I love you"s.

Once, a female classmate I had a passionate encounter with came to our city for a conference.

Since that time, we hadn't been very close. Sometimes we'd call to say hello, occasionally exchanging sweet words, but it was more like playful banter.

My wife had seen her picture in my graduation yearbook and heard my story about her, so she wasn't entirely unfamiliar with her.

I told my wife that she was coming for the conference. My

wife jokingly said, "Want to relive the old days? Want me to make room for you?" I went along with it, "No need, you don't take up much space. Our bed is big, three people can sleep in it."

Hearing this, my wife started scolding me and then suddenly grabbed me and pinched me.

Originally, I just wanted to treat my female classmate to a meal and show her around the city. I didn't plan to give her any special hospitality, since the conference organizers had already arranged her food and accommodation. But my wife said, "It's not easy for a classmate to come all this way, why not invite her to come to our house?"

I knew perfectly well what my wife's reaction meant: she was taking the initiative.

On the day my female classmate arrived, my wife took a day off to accompany me to the airport.

Her explanation was, "This way, it shows how much we value her." My female classmate was very surprised by my wife's appearance, because I hadn't told her beforehand.

But there was no need to worry; women are natural diplomats, masters of putting on a show.

Within five minutes of meeting, the two women, each harboring their own secrets, acted like sisters separated for ten years.

I glanced at their whispered conversation in the rearview mirror as I drove and couldn't help but chuckle.

Then, both women attacked me together. I thought to myself, "You two are putting on a really convincing show!" After dropping my classmate off at her place and sitting for a while, the three of us returned home.

My wife ran around getting drinks and peeling apples.

She whispered to me, "She's uglier than in the photos." Haha, that's women for you.

After a while, my wife said, "You two chat for a bit. I'm going out to buy groceries. We're not going out tonight, let's eat at home." Ignoring my classmate's attempts to stop her, she left.

I knew perfectly well that my wife wanted to give us some time alone.

This cunning woman, she had complete control over the situation, yet she maintained a flawless facade. She

wanted to be involved, but didn't want me to see any sign of jealousy.

After my wife left, my classmate and I remained seated, completely composed. After my wife's enthusiastic ministrations, we both lost any desire to do anything naughty.

My classmate said, "Your wife is so nice, I can tell. You two are very happy..." I went over, gently hugged her, and asked, "If I told him about us, what do you think she would do?" My classmate jumped, saying, "She'd definitely kill me." I laughed, "You're shameless, sleeping with someone else's husband and then acting all intimate with him like that." My classmate kicked me, "You're the one who seduced me." Half an hour later, my wife returned from grocery shopping. The two women busied themselves in the kitchen, and I couldn't help, so I lay on the bed watching TV. My wife sneaked

over and asked, "While I was away, you two didn't do anything naughty, did you?" I grabbed her hand, pulling it towards my pants, and said, "Come on, check yourself." My wife laughed, pulled away, and went back to the kitchen.

Dinner was plentiful, and the atmosphere at the table was harmonious. I drank baijiu (Chinese liquor), while my wife and my classmate drank red wine.

At first, my classmates talked about their trivial matters as a couple, as well as some embarrassing things that happened to me when I was in school; later, my wife recalled the process of how my husband and I met and fell in love.

Work, career, family, and so on.

One moment they'd be laughing heartily, the next a few tears would fall.

Later, they finished their red wine and started drinking beer, quickly emptying four bottles. Then they started fighting with me over the liquor.

I was terrified they'd say something inappropriate when they were drunk, so I clung tightly to the liquor bottle.

The two women quickly reached an agreement: "We won't drink that crap; we'll go out and buy some right now." They

were about to leave when I tried to stop them, but they punched and kicked me. I had no choice but to let them go.

They returned with a bunch of beer

, but didn't drink much. Instead, they continued their seemingly endless chatter about life.

Before I knew it, it was past 11 PM.

My classmate suggested going back to the hotel.

My wife strongly objected.

The hotel was far from our home, and she was worried about my safety driving after drinking. She also didn't want to let me take a taxi home alone, so she suggested my classmate stay overnight.

By then, we had moved to a bigger house with an extra small room for my parents who often stayed over.

Seeing this, my classmate didn't refuse and agreed to stay.

After a quick wash, my wife and I crawled into bed.

My wife's reaction was unusually enthusiastic. She coiled around me like a snake, kissing and biting. She

screamed and yelled without restraint beneath me.

I tried repeatedly to cover her mouth to stop her shouting, but it was futile; I couldn't stop her defiant cries.

After the passion subsided, I quickly fell asleep due to the alcohol.

I don't know how much time passed, but I woke up thirsty from the effects of ejaculation. Just as I was about to get up to get water, I suddenly noticed my wife staring at me with her eyes wide open.

My heart skipped a beat, and I asked her, "Why aren't you asleep?"

She said, "I can't sleep, I haven't slept at all."

I reached out and pulled her into my arms: "What's wrong, darling?"

She said, "Nothing, just overthinking."

I said, "What are you thinking about now? Tell me."

She hesitated for a moment, then asked, "Won't anything happen between you and her again?" I said, "Silly girl, believe me, I won't lie to you or hurt you again." My wife didn't answer, burying her head in my chest.

After a while, my wife suddenly stammered and said to me, "Why don't you go check on her?" This startled me, and I quickly said, "Nonsense, be good, go to sleep." My wife said, "I'm not joking, and I'm not testing you. I mean it. Go ahead." My mind raced, trying to figure out what was going on. Before I could understand, my wife added, "Come back in an hour." I didn't answer, but silently hugged my wife and kissed her deeply.

After a long while, my wife said again, "Go..."

Pushing open the door to the small room, I quietly asked, "Is she asleep?" There was no answer.

I went to the bedside; my female classmate was lying face up, her eyes open.

I pulled back the covers and lay down next to her, whispering, "Why aren't you asleep?" My classmate nudged me, saying urgently, "Are you crazy? Hurry up and go back, or we'll both be dead if your wife comes." I said, "It's okay, I won't do anything, I'll just hold you for a bit, then I'll go back right away." My classmate sighed, turned around and hugged me tightly, then whispered in my ear, "You're really too brave, aren't you afraid your wife will wake up and not be able to find you?" I sighed and said, "She already knows about us." Hearing this, my classmate didn't react with surprise. What puzzled me was my question. I asked her, "Aren't you scared?" She thought for a moment and said, "Actually, your husband already told me when we went out to buy alcohol." I fell silent... I lay there quietly for a while, then she said, "Go back. I can't do anything to betray her again." I got up and walked towards my wife's room. Suddenly, an idea popped into my head. I quickly went back to the bedside, picked her up, and said, "Come here too." My classmate struggled and cursed at me, "Put me down, you bastard, do you want to die?" I ignored her and carried her to my wife's and my room.

As we entered, to cover up the awkwardness, she deliberately called my wife's name loudly and said, "Don't you care about your husband? Look at the mess you've made!" My wife was equally surprised and said, "Why aren't you sleeping properly in the middle of the night? You two are just making a mess of things." I walked to the bedside and heavily threw the woman in my arms onto the bed.

The female classmate, trying to get out of bed, said, "I'm not going to mess around with you guys anymore, I'm going back to sleep."

My wife said, "Since you're already here, let's talk for a bit. I'm too excited from drinking to sleep."

Seeing this, the classmate went along with it and lay down on the bed, still muttering to me, "You really need to control your jerk husband." My wife laughed and pulled the blanket over her.

I went around to the edge of the bed and lay down next to my wife.

I was on the far end, my wife was in the middle, and she was on the far end.

The atmosphere became a little awkward.

Neither of us knew what to say, so I tried to make conversation with my wife, saying, "She hasn't slept either." My wife teased my classmate, "Even country bumpkins are too excited to sleep on their first trip to the city." My classmate said, "I do want to sleep, but you two are making such a racket, it's driving me crazy." I chimed in, "If I'd known it would be like this, I would have lent you my bed." (1) As soon as I finished speaking, my wife immediately said, "That's right, it's not like we haven't used it

before." My classmate, upon hearing this, said, "You two must be crazy." I pretended to be drunk and suddenly appeared in the middle of everyone. My classmate tried to get up and run away, but I pulled him back and put my arm around him. So, I had one arm around her and the other around my wife.

The three of us lay there silently, each feeling the other's heartbeat.

Suddenly, a hand touched my penis. Judging from the direction, the hand belonged to my wife.

I'm writing this down for outsiders to see... It might seem exciting, but I was incredibly nervous. Far from being excited, my penis felt completely limp and numb.

My wife teased me, "You useless man, two beautiful women in your arms and you don't even react!" I turned and kissed my wife passionately. The tension eased a bit, and my female classmate reached out and hugged me.

The two women's hands alternately caressed my sensitive areas. Later, I moved to the outermost edge of the bed, and my wife and I embraced her from both sides, caressing each other. Suddenly, she and my wife kissed. This was the first time I had ever truly witnessed two women caressing each other, and I never imagined it would feel so beautiful… During this time, I tried to penetrate my classmate, but it didn't work. My initially excited penis went limp as soon as it reached the entrance.

I think it was probably because I was hesitant to enter my classmate's body, worried that she wouldn't accept it, and also because I wasn't fully psychologically prepared. This strange feeling prevented me from completely letting go.

However, the sensory stimulation was already intense enough.

After a period of passion, the alcohol made me a little dizzy. They cuddled together, talking intermittently, and I slowly fell asleep.

The next morning, I was shaken awake. I opened my eyes and saw my classmate, already dressed. I didn't quite register it at first. Looking at the bed, my wife wasn't there. I asked her, "Where's XX?" She said, "She's cooking in the kitchen. Get up quickly." I pulled her close and kissed her.

Then I got up.

That was the end of it. My classmate attended a three-day conference, and when she left, my wife and I went to the airport to see her off.

Seeing their reluctance to part, I realized they were both genuinely sincere.

The initial feeling of ulterior motives vanished.

Afterwards, I talked to my wife about it several times, trying to understand her true motives for asking me to go to another room that night. Each time, she explained it as: "I drank too much."

So, I stopped pressing her.

Now, I understand my wife's behavior that night as follows:

First, there was an element of excitement, but not much.

Second, perhaps it stemmed from a sense of atonement within her. Although I don't believe she committed a grave mistake, that brief affair years ago remains a knot she can't untie.

Third, she wanted to use this method to firmly grasp my heart.

Perhaps there was a touch of each of these three elements, or perhaps none at all.

If you carefully observe women, you'll discover many mysteries about them that you'll never fully understand.

[The End]

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