Common misconceptions about orgasm: Don't imitate, don't force it.

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We must avoid common misconceptions about orgasm.
Sexual climax is a desired outcome for every couple during every sexual encounter, and pursuing it appropriately is normal. However, deliberately pursuing it will lead to the opposite of what is expected, as the saying goes, "haste makes waste." Not only will it fail to achieve the desired result, but it may also bring about some adverse consequences. Therefore, it is important to avoid common misconceptions regarding sexual climax.
1. Don't force yourself or both partners to have an orgasm every time you have sex. An orgasm is not the sole purpose of sexual activity. Rather than viewing it as the inevitable outcome of sex, consider it an unexpected bonus of loving intimacy. Having an orgasm is pleasurable; not having one is also enjoyable. This way, there's no mental or physical burden during sex, and objectively, it's easier to achieve and control an orgasm. Some couples lack this understanding, believing that others experience "ecstasy" every time they have sex, and that they should too, or that it's abnormal if they don't. While an orgasm isn't an unattainable peak, it's not something easily achieved either, especially for women who are more susceptible to psychological and physiological factors. The correct attitude is to fully enjoy and appreciate each instance of sexual intimacy, savoring the love expressed by both partners, and experiencing the warmth of love through mutual giving and receiving. If one or both partners don't have an orgasm, neither should feel regret. A positive attitude is to encourage each other, avoiding discouragement or resentment; in this way, even without an orgasm, the sex life will still leave beautiful memories for both partners.
Second: Don't force both partners to reach orgasm simultaneously. While it's ideal for both partners to reach orgasm at the same time, this shouldn't be the standard for measuring the success of sex. Generally, men reach orgasm within 3-5 minutes of intercourse, while women need 8-10 minutes. Therefore, men should try to prolong the act of intercourse as much as possible, entering the refractory phase more slowly, and controlling their physiological and psychological engagement after intercourse to avoid reaching orgasm too quickly and entering the refractory period. Even so, expecting both partners to reach orgasm simultaneously is not guaranteed, and in some ways, unnecessary. Because women have the capacity for consecutive orgasms, the husband can enter the refractory period after his wife's orgasm, potentially leading to greater satisfaction for her.
Third: Do not imitate or pursue the orgasmic experiences of others. Orgasmic experiences vary greatly; what is described in books is merely a general description or what the author believes should be the case, not a uniform one. Some books, in particular, depict orgasms in vivid and erotic detail, making readers yearn for them. Some then deliberately seek this out, for example, by checking clocks or reciting poems, trying to meticulously replicate this ideal state. The result of this approach is usually disappointment and frustration. This is because it's like having a third party suddenly appear during a romantic getaway, interfering and disrupting the enjoyment of the natural harmony between two people, obscuring the peak experience of orgasm. It must be understood that the experience of orgasm is influenced by each person's physical and mental state; it is never "one-size-fits-all." Writers, too, are naturally constrained by their personal sexual attitudes and influenced by artistic techniques when expressing themselves. This can be likened to the process of sexual union, where a couple climbs a magnificent mountain together. That mountain belongs only to the two of you; through your own efforts and mutual dedication, you appreciate the beautiful scenery and experience what you enjoy – a joy known only to the two of you. In your leisure time, you can share your experiences to strengthen your love. Others' opinions should only be taken with a grain of salt, and it's best to listen as little as possible to avoid confusion.

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Common misconceptions about orgasm: Don't imitate, don't force it.

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