A Female Civil Servant's Diary Chapters 1-293

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【A Female Civil Servant's Diary】(Chapters 1-293)
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【Synopsis】

A woman's career journey and love diary. A smooth, delicate body, a pure and beautiful face, a bewitching mind, and a mysterious parchment scroll—she navigates the complexities of various levels of government, using her youth, body, emotions, and intelligence to obtain what she desires. A beauty coveted by many men, where will her heart ultimately lead her? A

Female Civil Servant's Diary

Chapter 001. Me and the Municipal Party Secretary April 27, 2013, Sunny.

No one could have imagined that I would get married on this day, including myself.

My husband, Cheng Zheng, is five years older than me. We only met once before setting the wedding date.

On the evening of April 26, the day before the wedding, I went to the villa given to me by the Municipal Party Secretary's father, and we made love twice.

Secretary Hou's real name is Hou Dahai, 52 years old. Privately, I call him Father Hou.

I have a villa, a gift from him, located by the sea in the S City High-Tech Zone, a typical wealthy area. The villas have large private gardens with dedicated driveways and paths, making it difficult for owners to see into each other's private lives. This is our main hideout.

Like most middle-aged Chinese officials, he's long been overweight and lacks regular exercise, so his physical condition is far from that of younger men in other professions.

Often, when he wants me, he likes to take medication to prolong the duration. He says he enjoys seeing me blush and become extremely seductive during his advances.

Actually, I have a way to prolong the duration without him taking medication, but I don't easily use that method on certain people. Good steel should be used where it's needed most—that's an irrefutable principle. I can sleep with certain men, but that doesn't mean I'm interested in making any extra sacrifices for them, such as genuine, devoted love.

That evening, Secretary Hou asked me to wait for him at the villa. He said he would be my "groom" on my eve of the wedding.
I obediently followed his instructions and drove to that secluded, affluent area after work.
I like owning many houses, liking their different scenic locations and different decorating styles. This might be related to my impoverished upbringing; in those few dilapidated rural houses of my childhood, I endured too much of the harshness of human nature.

Entering the villa, only one rotating wall lamp was on, its ambiguous light displaying different colors that shifted in the vast room. I had taken a bath and was wearing a thin red nightgown, the hem just short enough to cover my ample hips.

Two beautiful, long legs lay bare beneath the skirt, white and smooth, accentuating the soft, red gauze, revealing my slender figure, with pert breasts and a slim waist, fair and delicate, exuding a thousand kinds of allure…

Hou Dahai said I was the kind of woman men would want to sleep with at first glance.

The room was strewn with rose petals, their rich fragrance stirring my emotions.

I've long understood that women should treat themselves well, loving themselves ten times more than foolishly loving a man even a fraction more. So now, no matter who I sleep with, I always create an atmosphere that's incredibly comfortable and alluring, highlighting my own beauty and arousing their desire.

But when I decided to marry Cheng Zheng, this was my thought: if he loves you ten times, then you love him twelve times; if he loves you eight times, then you love him seven times.

Cheng Zheng is the first man in all these years I've wanted to spend my life with.

Secretary Hou arrived. As soon as he entered, he called out, "My darling, Daddy Hou is here."

I went to greet him, my steps graceful, chin slightly raised, my eyes glancing at him with affection, a foxy smile playing on my lips. I whispered, "Daddy Hou."

He reached out and pulled me onto his robust body, his hands already kneading my full breasts beneath my thin veil. He whispered breathlessly in my ear, "My darling, you're going to be a bride tomorrow, Daddy Hou will miss you."

I gasped, tilting my head back to kiss his stubble-covered, rough chin. "So, Daddy Hou, you have to pamper me tonight, okay?"

He said, "Of course, come on, baby."

His hands roamed over my body, squeezing my full breasts, his mouth pressing against them through my clothes, sucking hard.

I moaned softly, my arms wrapping around his waist like snakes, deliberately pressing my soft body against his abdomen.

There, he was already hard as iron, and he let out a heavy, labored breath.

In official settings, when he mentioned me, he always addressed me with a serious yet kind tone, calling me "Director Qiao." No one could have imagined that the usually stern and unsmiling Secretary Hou would so wildly call me "Sweetheart, Darling, Good Daughter" in private.

Of course, in this world, there are countless unexpected things hidden in the shadows. For example, Secretary Hou wouldn't know that Mayor Liu Songtao of S City would also call me "Fairy" under my seductive charm. My nightgown had a deep V-neck, and his lips kissed down my neck, easily pulling down the neckline of my dress, revealing two beautiful, alluring breasts. Secretary Hou's lips pressed urgently against them.

A tingling, numb sensation spread throughout my body. I called out seductively, "Daddy Hou," and clung to him until we rolled onto the bed.

I wasn't wearing anything under my dress.

His clothes were quickly thrown to the ground. Without any foreplay, he thrust into me. The moment he entered, he let out a low moan, his breath coming in gasps like someone suffering from chronic heart disease.

I arched my beautiful buttocks, forcefully meeting his, actively swaying my hips. Stimulated by my powerful contractions, he swelled and hardened, like a fierce cheetah thrusting and moving rapidly against my body.

Chapter 002. Our desire filled the entire room during our intimate moments on the plane. Under the flickering lights, only the couple on the bed, intertwined and thrusting wildly.

He had taken medication beforehand, but his middle-aged body still couldn't withstand my intense contractions. In less than ten minutes, he ejaculated, unsatisfied.

He lay on top of me, panting heavily, kneading my smooth, fragrant shoulders, saying, "My darling, you're so good at moving, it makes my whole body feel like it's melting inside you, it's killing me."

My soft hands caressed his thick waist, and I said seductively, "I don't want your life, I just want lots and lots of your love."

Secretary Hou smiled contentedly, nibbled on my ear, and said, "My darling, I'll give you that."

After our first quick encounter, his body had developed a tolerance, and I obediently climbed off him, skillfully kissing his body.

I knew where his sensitive spots were: his nipples, his navel, the inside of his thighs.

My service made him spasm with pleasure, breathing heavily, and he pressed me down beneath him again.

Secretary Hou was a shrewd and capable man; from him, I learned many intangible things.

Climbing the ranks in officialdom is like a Tai Chi diagram, the techniques of which can only be understood intuitively, not explained in words.

On the night of April 26, 2013, I made love twice with Hou Dahai, the Party Secretary of the Municipal Committee, and spent half the night in absurdity.
Meanwhile, my fiancé, Cheng Zheng, was staying at a hotel with his parents who had come from Xiangfan, perhaps dreaming about our wedding the next day.

On April 27, 2013, the weather was fine, and my wedding with Cheng Zheng was held romantically and solemnly in a Christian church built during the German occupation of S City.

I wore a gorgeous and pure custom-made wedding dress, a beautiful lily crown on my head, and a happy and serene smile on my lips as I confidently walked towards my groom, Cheng Zheng, who was both refined and possessed a certain free-spiritedness characteristic of men from Northwest China.

He took my outstretched hand with eyes full of happiness and affection, and led me slowly towards the pastor behind the altar.
Every young girl has fantasized countless times about her own magnificent wedding, secretly sketching the image of the man who will lead her hand into the wedding in her future heart.

I, Qiao Baobao, was no exception.

When I was still an ugly duckling, I also imagined what my wedding would look like and who my groom would be.

Now, I have finally stepped into this day, holding someone's hand. I am smiling, but in my heart, I whisper to the penniless girl of yesteryear, tears welling in my eyes: My dear, you have long since been reborn, you are no longer yourself.

After the wedding ceremony, there was a lively banquet. The banquet hall of the Golden Palace Hotel was festive and bustling. Colleagues from various departments at the grassroots level and in the city, as well as some business owners, all gave me face. Even the mayor and the municipal party secretary personally attended the banquet, adding to my glory.

Secretary Hou set aside his airs as a leader and offered his congratulations in an approachable manner, like an elder, and drank the toasts offered by me and the groom. In public

, he was so dignified, but in my mind, I was still thinking about the night before when he was naked and prostrate on me, sweating profusely.

Mayor Liu Songtao also warmly shook hands with Cheng Zheng and me, saying similar words of blessing as Secretary Hou, and drank the wedding wine. The two figures of high status stayed for a few minutes before leaving in harmony.

I had previously bought a 150-square-meter duplex apartment as our wedding home. Of course, no one but me knew where this house came from. Before the wedding, I transferred the property to Cheng Zheng's name.

After the wedding banquet, we left the apartment with his parents who had come from afar for a short stay, and rushed to Shanghai Airport overnight to fly to the Maldives for our honeymoon.

Cheng Zheng was a happy groom. On the plane, his arm was wrapped around my waist, and his lips lingered on my ear as he whispered, "Baby, am I dreaming? Are we really married?"
I turned my face slightly and gently touched his lips with mine. "Of course not. You can try it if you don't believe me. It feels so real."

As I spoke, I mischievously grabbed his hand and placed it on my pert breasts.

His breathing quickened immediately, his palms warm, as he greedily kneaded my breasts. "My little devil, I love you! I want you."

My hands wrapped around his back, gently stroking him through his soft cotton shirt, teasing him. "Really?
Now? How? There are so many people around, do you dare?"

He grabbed one of my small hands and pressed it against his trousers, saying through gritted teeth, "Try it, see what you've done to me. If you dare to want it, I dare to give it to you!"

My hand grasped his hardness, and he let out a suppressed moan. His lips captured mine, his tongue prying open my teeth and slipping inside.

Our tongues played and intertwined in my mouth, saliva constantly overflowing from around our tongues, which he greedily swallowed.

Our fiery passion drew the attention of the passengers next to us, who turned their heads away. We kissed passionately, completely oblivious to the envy or scorn of others.

Cheng Zheng's hands, not content with merely ravaging my breasts, boldly slipped inside my skirt, where it was already damp, and I moaned softly.

Chapter 003. In the tropical rainforest, desire surged to an unbearable intensity. Cheng Zheng gave me a hint, and we left our seats one after the other, heading to the restroom.

Closing the door, in the cramped space, we kissed and caressed each other passionately. He pulled down my panties, making me brace my hands against the restroom door, my rear end arched high.

He unzipped his pants and eagerly pushed himself inside.

A tight, fusion, a lubricated rhythm, we moaned suppressedly, intertwined, he biting my ear repeatedly, "Wife, wife, I love you, how can you be so tight?"

When we emerged from the restroom, my hair was slightly disheveled, my face flushed, Cheng Zheng's breathing slightly rapid, a light sheen of sweat on his nose.
Oblivious to the stares of the other passengers, we walked to our seats, sat down, and chuckled softly, entwined in a passionate embrace.
Years of working as a civil servant have molded me into a woman with typical Pisces traits: one face in public, another in private. Seemingly romantic and gentle, yet actually rational and calm. Because I am a true Capricorn woman; it's just that when the village issued my household registration certificate, a clerical error made a mistake with my birth date, so the date on my identity card is six months older than my actual age.

My grandmother left me a small parchment scroll with mysterious twelve zodiac symbols. Later, after gradually studying and delving deeper, I've vaguely summarized the characteristics of Capricorn women.

Born in the harsh winter, Capricorn is half goat and half fish, symbolizing their independent spirit and feminine nature.
The goat's striving, perseverance, gentleness, and charm combined with the fish's carefree nature defies categorization. Add to that Saturn, the ruling planet of the dark side of the universe, and a complex yet courageous image emerges. No other zodiac sign's woman, when faced with major setbacks, can analyze the situation, the odds of success, and how to improve the situation without emotional reaction.

Capricorn, yet she was like an unyielding blade of grass, bending with the wind yet standing tall against it, calmly assessing the situation and maneuvering forward...

On the plane, nestled affectionately in Cheng Zheng's arms, I so loved this unrestrained, rebellious demeanor in front of strangers. Real society is too full of unspoken rules and repression; I need to change my persona from time to time to ease myself.
On April 28, 2013, after landing in Malé, the plane flew to Sun Island.

The island was sunny and the air was so clear it seemed washed with mountain spring water.

Such a beautiful island, such a beautiful time, yet I was so lazy I felt drowsy, too lazy to walk. I reached out to Cheng Zheng playfully, saying, "Darling, carry me."

Cheng Zheng bent over affectionately, turning back to say, "I'm willing to be your humble servant, come on, baby."

I leaped lightly onto him, hugging his neck, and he carried me leisurely.

I leaned against his back, completely relaxed, gazing at the blue sky, white clouds, sandy beach, and ocean. I murmured, "Cheng Zheng, thank you for letting me know you, thank you for falling in love with me, thank you for your unconditional trust, thank you for not having met the woman you wanted to marry before, but finally agreeing to marry me."

My tears silently rolled down his neck. He playfully scratched my buttocks a few times, then turned and bit my delicate chin, saying, "You don't need to sweet-talk me anymore. Even without you, I'm already blissfully lost. Don't worry, baby, I'll love you with my life."

I laughed behind him, my pearly teeth playfully nibbling at his earlobe. "That's what you call sweet-talking! Even though promises aren't meant to be kept, saying them now still touches me deeply. Honey, what am I going to do? I want you again..." Cheng Zheng's body stiffened, his breathing quickening instantly. "Little devil, it's me who wants you, not you who wants me. You can only be wanted..." I deliberately continued to tease him. "No, I insist! I want you!"
There were huts nearby, but no one knew us. Cheng Zheng, whom I had successfully picked beans from, carried me into the primeval rainforest. The forest was dense and beautiful, like a Renaissance painting.

On a quiet, clean sandy path, we rolled and kissed.

He said he hadn't made love properly for years, and he wanted to make up for all the pleasures he had wasted. He wanted to make love as passionately as possible, day and night.

I pressed him down on the sand, straddling his stomach with my legs spread.

I wasn't wearing anything under my bohemian dress, and he slipped his hands inside to loosen his belt.

I placed my hands on his chest, looking at him seductively, and slowly sat down, aligning my hips with his hot member.

Cheng Zheng breathed heavily, his hands caressing my breasts, his gaze fixed on me passionately. We became intimately intertwined.

I opened my red lips and moaned loudly, my long hair swirling wildly behind me, my body rising and falling on him beneath my dress.

His body tensed, responding to my thrusts. He asked me in a hoarse voice, "Baby, why are we so good together?"

He'd asked me that question countless times.

I couldn't bear his lingering gaze. I buried my face in his, pressing my lips to his, my tongue actively entering his mouth, capturing his large tongue, sucking and entwining it. At the same time, my breasts pressed tightly against his chest, my legs grinding and demanding.

I craved Cheng Zheng's love, but I couldn't openly face it, because my heart held too many secrets that couldn't be revealed.

Just like everything recorded in this diary, a book whose contents no one knew.

He entered me deeply, and I gripped him tightly, sucking, contracting, the intense stimulation overwhelming us. Finally, Cheng Zheng couldn't withstand the agonizing friction and released himself with pleasure.

He lay wearily on the sand beneath me, holding me tightly, and said contentedly, "Fairy, I love you, and I love being taken from you so indiscriminately."

I laughed, my long hair disheveled and covering his face, and shamelessly said, "Man, you just got fucked by me, hee hee."

He squeezed my delicate buttocks, which he had irrigated, hard, "Fairy! A fairy who sucks men's marrow!"
(The following text appears to be
an unrelated advertisement and has been omitted

from the translation.)

Chapter 004. My online name is "Baby."

That night, Qiao Baby, this fairy, was again entangled by Cheng Zheng and made love to him. When he fell asleep like a playful child, I got up from his arms, sat beside him, and, under the starlight and night of Sun Island in the Indian Ocean, carefully examined the handsome features in his eyes.

Have I finally gotten married? Have I finally married myself to a man?

This man named Cheng Zheng, we met by chance, traveled thousands of miles to get to know each other, and after just one meeting, we resolutely decided to entrust the rest of our lives to each other?

Our acquaintance, encounter, understanding, and love were simply too dramatic. I will mention these things later.
He, a self-proclaimed tough-on-the-bones, soft-on-the-heart urban single man, was born in Yan'an, grew up in Xiangfan, and worked in Shanghai, while I had always been moving around in the province to which S city belongs.

In the years to come, would he, Cheng Zheng, whom I married in a whirlwind romance, truly accept my broken and shattered soul completely?
On the night of April 28, 2013, I sat quietly beside him, gazing at him intently, tears streaming down my face.

The past seemed like a dream, yet vividly real.

If he knew everything that had happened in my youth, would he still love me as he said?

When we first met by chance, he looked at me with piercing eyes, his mouth agape in astonishment, but he didn't dare to ask me easily, "Are you a baby?"

At that time, we had never exchanged photos.

My online name is the same as my real name: Baobao (Baby).

But people generally don't believe that a woman would dare to use her real name as her online name.

Baobao, this online name sounds so clichéd and fake.

When we first met online, I told Cheng Zheng, who was thirty-eight, that I was a thirty-three-year-old single woman, a freelancer with an uncertain future.

He didn't comment, saying that as long as we clicked, he didn't care what I really looked like. Then he jokingly added that his words went against a man's nature, sounding very fake, haha.

But he didn't know that everyone around me knew that thirty-three-year-old Qiao Baobao possessed the youthful, radiant beauty of a twenty-year-old.

In the S City government, this was a story that made men yearn for it and women envious and jealous.

Many people have asked me about my secret to staying young, and I just laugh and say that I was born this way, there's no secret.

How could there be no secret? Before I turned twenty, I was a gloomy ugly duckling for a long time, never even having a proper first love. But in the days and nights after I turned twenty, my heart underwent a profound transformation, while my appearance rose like a phoenix, remaining steadfast in the beautiful allure of youth, never to change again.

So, when Cheng Zheng first saw my true face at the airport, he stared at me with wide eyes, unable to easily associate a thirty-three-year-old single woman with the appearance of a twenty-year-old girl.
And all of this begins with my family, continuing all the way to this year, explaining why I have become the Qiao Baobao I am today.

Everyone, from birth to death, bears the same name, representing the same person, but in reality, each individual life has long since transformed into many different selves. The journey of the heart determines one's outward behavior, and the subversion or reshaping of one's values.

Those dark days I've lived through still wake me up in the middle of the night, tears streaming down my face.

The year 2000 was a year many had eagerly awaited to mark the turn of the century.

I remember in 1986, during my first-grade Chinese class, a teacher jokingly told us that when he was in junior high, a teacher who taught politics had told them with boundless anticipation that by the year 2000, our country would be stepping into a new era. He imagined that ordinary people would be freed from arduous manual labor, with robots providing all kinds of work. We would each own a car, eat well, dress well, and leisurely stroll around the streets, traveling. If we ran out of gas, we could simply go to the gas station and have a robot fill up the tank for us without spending a penny. But when 2000 actually arrived, for ordinary people, it was just like any other ordinary day before—it slipped by peacefully and uneventfully, only to vanish just as easily and meaninglessly.

That year, I was about to graduate from university, burying myself in books like a penitent preparing for graduate school entrance exams.

I was very thin back then, like a withered flower bud that never bloomed, hiding drably among the brightly colored leaves of girls my age, ignored by others and ignored by myself.

I wore the cheapest clothes, had the most old-fashioned straight hair, didn't know how to do makeup, didn't know how to get along with people, and had no hobbies other than reading.

In my youth, I never experienced a dreamlike, pure first love. Like a groundhog afraid to face the sun, I hid in my own little burrow, foolishly harboring a secret crush on a delinquent named Fu Shi. In

1992, during my first year of junior high, I was like a weak bean sprout, deeply bewitched by Fu Shi, the most notorious bad student in the entire school. I fell hopelessly in love with him, infatuated with him, just like that popular saying on Weibo now: "In youth, who hasn't loved a scumbag or two?" I'll talk

about Fu Shi later; let's start by remembering why I suddenly decided to take the civil service exam in 2000.

In 1986, when I was six, my father, who had married into the family, had an affair that my mother discovered. She was a strong-willed woman, unable to bear the blow and shame of betrayal in the love she had given so wholeheartedly. She poisoned my father's drink, and they both died from it.

In the autumn of 2000, my grandmother, my only remaining family member, suddenly fell critically ill and was taken to the county hospital by the villagers.
When I rushed back to the hospital from school, I found my critically ill grandmother in a very ordinary eight-bed ward. Patients were urinating and defecating in the room, creating a foul odor. The patients and their families in this ward all wore sorrowful faces, displaying a resigned indifference to this undignified state of life.

I knelt before my grandmother's bedside, weeping. I wanted to move her to a ward with fewer beds, since the cost was the same for an eight-bed and a four-bed ward. I saw that a patient had just been discharged from the four-bed ward, leaving a vacant bed.

If I had any influence, I could easily have moved my grandmother to a better ward. However, at that time, I had nothing—no money, no power, no connections. I could only watch helplessly as an elderly woman in the same ward, whose daughter worked in a government agency, successfully moved to that ward.

The other patients sighed, "Ah, they really do have some power. Unlike us ordinary folks, we can't even get a word in with them in the hospital."

My grandmother spent her final moments in that crowded, noisy, dirty, and chaotic ward, filled with the stench of body odor and excrement.

Perhaps many people in society die in such environments, and perhaps many helpless families choose to accept it indifferently. But if you haven't personally experienced the heartbreaking feeling of losing your only loved one in such a terrible environment, you won't understand the self-reproach and grief I felt at that time.

Late at night on August 3, 2000, my grandmother awoke from her coma, tightly grasped my hand, and silently shed tears. With the last strength of her life, she said to me, "Baby, we're all gone now. From now on, you must take good care of yourself. Keep this little booklet your grandparents left you safe. Don't look at it or learn from it unless absolutely necessary, understand? Grandma's leaving, my baby."

Late that night, alone and helpless, I sobbed uncontrollably in the quiet hospital room.

I had seen the little booklet my grandmother mentioned when I was little. It had no words, only some hieroglyphic-like pictures engraved on a few pages of parchment. Back then, my grandmother wouldn't let me look at it, saying that good girls shouldn't read such things.

I was curious and asked my mother what was drawn in it. My mother said it taught women how to take care of themselves, and if they followed the instructions, they would stay young forever.

I asked my mother, "Then why didn't Grandma let me and you learn from it? Why didn't Grandma learn it herself?" I didn't want my grandmother to grow old.

My mother gently hugged me and said, "You're too young to understand. As for Grandma and me, we just want to live a simple life, to be ordinary women. There's no need for us to learn."

But my father's betrayal of the marriage shattered my mother's ideal of a simple life. She chose a decisive break, like a snapping string, playing the final, extraordinary note of her life.

At my grandmother's funeral, only Uncle Qiao Zhuang, our neighbor, and a few kind villagers helped me bury her in the Qiao family ancestral graveyard.

Because my father married into the Qiao family, I took my mother's surname, Qiao. Beside my grandmother's grave are buried my deceased grandfather, father, and mother.

Uncle Qiao and his wife pulled me up, having cried until I had no more tears left. They patted my shoulder and said, "Child, don't be sad. If you're like this, your grandparents won't be at peace in the afterlife. Life goes on. Work hard, find a good young man, get married, have a child, and you'll have a long and happy life ahead of you! Uncle Qiao's house will be your family home from now on!"

After thanking the elderly couple, I left the desolate and remote cemetery and walked alone towards the town bus station to catch a bus back to school.

On Lingshan Mountain, northeast of the town, a new commercial cemetery had been built. Nestled against the mountain and facing the water, it was said that an ordinary burial plot there was enough for an average farming family to live on for ten years.

I saw a long line of black cars escorting a luxuriously decorated hearse, a grand procession playing mournful music as it drove towards the cemetery.

Passersby all stood on the side of the road, glancing sideways.

An honest, haggard-looking farmer said enviously, "I heard that's the hearse for the father of the top official in some county bureau. Look how grand his death is! He died with more fanfare than us. Tsk tsk, our lives are as worthless as grass." On

August 5, 2000, at that moment, I suddenly changed my mind about continuing my postgraduate studies and decided to take the civil service exam, which was just becoming popular in the area at the turn of the century.

For someone from a poor family, whose life had always been mundane and even as insignificant as grass, I didn't really understand the civil service profession. I simply thought that if I wanted to enter the elite class in the future, I had to at least cross the threshold to reach it, right?

You see, the reasons for the changes and opportunities in a person's fate are sometimes so ridiculous, naive, simple, and even vulgar.

What solidified my low-minded determination was a woman in the village named Xiao Xiaofeng.
She was almost a persistent ghost in my childhood and adolescence.

She wasn't pretty, but my grandmother, mother, and all the women and men in the town said she was very seductive.
She had an uncle who was the deputy county head, and that alone was enough for her to run rampant in our small town.

She was thirty-two and unmarried, brazenly seducing all sorts of men—anyone she fancied, including my father.

So, she was the invisible killer who led to the deaths of both my parents.

Because of her interference in my parents' lives, my six-year-old grandmother and I were left to fend for ourselves, poor, insecure, and vulnerable to bullying.

If it weren't for the constant financial support from our neighbor, Uncle Qiao Zhuang's family, my grandmother might have died much earlier from overwork, and I would never have been able to go to university.

I was about to leave town when I saw Uncle Qiao Zhuang, who had just finished commemorating my grandmother's funeral, running frantically towards the town police station, wailing uncontrollably.

His aged body, topped with gray hair, staggered, but he ran with astonishing speed.
Many people, bewildered, gathered around the police station, and I followed.

There, the body of Uncle Qiao Zhuang's son, Qiao Kang, lay starkly.

Qiao Kang had been working away from home. When he returned to visit his family, Xiao Xiaofeng targeted him, harassing him and making advances. When Qiao Kang refused, she became enraged and falsely accused him of raping her.

Qiao Kang was taken to the police station for questioning and did not return home for two nights and a day. He died mysteriously in the interrogation room. The police said that Qiao Kang died suddenly from a venous thrombosis that entered his lungs.

His son was dead, the case was unsolved, and then Uncle Qiao Zhuang's four houses suddenly caught fire and burned to ashes.

Kind people secretly advised the elderly couple to take it easy, that they couldn't afford to offend the woman surnamed Xiao, and to let go of their son's case—it was like an egg trying to break a rock; they should save their lives to raise their grandson, Qiqi.

Devastated, Uncle Qiao lost his voice overnight, becoming mute. Aunt Qiao's hair turned white overnight, and she went blind. Her daughter-in-law cruelly left this utterly destroyed family.

I gave Uncle Qiao the keys to my family's several dilapidated rooms, letting them move in. The old man's eyes were vacant, his tears already dried. I hugged Aunt Qiao and cried, saying, "From now on, I will be your granddaughter."
I didn't say anything more, only silently pondering in my heart, "Woman surnamed Xiao, will you have the last laugh…?
"

Back at school, I began frantically studying for the civil service exam with a female classmate who was also bad at romance.

Her name was Hu Hehe. We chose the same career path back then, and she became my only best friend over the years, but later our romantic trajectories diverged drastically.

She was a warm, cheerful, and intelligent girl, a student council member with a slightly tomboyish personality. The boys jokingly said she wasn't suited for dating, but rather for being a buddy.

Our friendship began on May 28, 1999. Late at night, she went to the dormitory platform to collect some underwear she'd forgotten to take in. She heard me standing alone on the platform, facing the starry sky, softly singing song after song.

Those were beautiful love songs, the content of which I had never personally experienced, and they brought tears to my eyes.
That night, the stars were bright, the spring breeze was gentle, and Hehe was deeply moved by my singing and my solitary tears.

Chapter 006. The Evil Male Teacher. She stepped forward and hugged me warmly, sincerely saying, "Qiao Baobao, I'm the first person to discover your amazing potential. You should participate in a singing competition; don't bury your beautiful voice!"

I smiled shyly and quietly said, "I just want to be an ordinary girl, to have a beautiful and lasting love. I don't have the energy to do anything more. "

Starting on the evening of May 28, 1999, Hu Hehe and I became inseparable best friends. At the time, I, an ordinary girl, fell deeply in love with the kind-hearted and very popular Hehe.

To participate in the provincial selection exam for civil servants, I first had to pass the school's review. At that time, I was just an ordinary girl, a member of the Communist Youth League, with no outstanding achievements, used to being alone, and had no effective connections with the school.
Hu Hehe was already a Party member and a student union cadre; her review was straightforward. To ensure I could participate in the exam smoothly, she acted as a go-between, quickly strengthening communication with the school.

That evening, Hehe treated the school leader in charge of the review to dinner, asking him to help approve my somewhat flimsy application.

Hehe had never drunk red wine before, but that night, for me, she splurged and ordered a bottle of red wine costing several hundred yuan. However, she was allergic to red wine; after only two sips, she was completely drunk and passed out, falling soundly asleep on the sofa.

In the quiet hotel private room, only the school leader and I remained.

That day felt like a nightmare; I don't want to recall the exact date.

The school leader, surnamed Chen, was in his forties, quite refined-looking, wearing sophisticated glasses. His smile was gentle, but a fleeting glint lurked in his eyes behind those glasses, and his gaze sent a chill down my spine.

We had both been drinking; my face must have been flushed. When I saw Hehe pass out, I hurriedly stood up and said, "Teacher Chen, I'm sorry, Hehe is drunk. We have to go back now. I'm leaving my affairs in your care."
At that moment, I dared not look people in the eye when I spoke, and my voice trembled, like a shy mimosa that easily closes its head.

Chen also stood up from his chair, looking at me with a half-smile, walked up to me, stopped, and remained silent.

A sense of oppressive adult male presence enveloped me, and I began to tremble involuntarily, my head drooping even lower.
Suddenly, a hand reached down to my chin; the warm touch of male skin made my whole body stiffen, my teeth chattered uncontrollably, and I passively looked up at him.

He lifted my chin with his finger, placed his other hand on my forehead, and brushed aside the hair that I usually hid half my face. A playful smile played on his lips as he scrutinized me intently.

I looked at him nervously, my lips trembling as I stammered, "Teacher Chen, you...?"

His hand gently caressed my face, deliberately rubbing my earlobe. His fingers brushed against my lips, sending shivers down my spine. Instinctively, I wanted to run away, but I found myself as if under a spell; my legs went weak, and my body was beyond my control.

He lowered his head, bringing his breath close to my ear, and whispered, "I didn't expect you to have such a good foundation. You're like a rough gem hidden beneath a stone, a little beauty in the making. Hehe, you know, there are many students who want to pass the review, but you don't meet almost any of the requirements. I'm asking you, do you really want to take this exam that could change your destiny?"

I almost cried, feeling utterly hopeless. He hit all my weak points. If I wanted to escape this fate of being at the mercy of others in the future, I really needed to take this exam.

At the time, I didn't know that I could directly exchange my youth for the favor of powerful men and thus succeed or rise in status. I only knew the foolish and naive idea of relying on my so-called real abilities and taking the exam to change my fate.
My tears streamed down, washing over my face, which I never wore makeup. I pleaded softly, "Teacher Chen, please help me."

He pushed me against the wall. I had nowhere to retreat and passively watched his playful gaze. His eyes gleamed with the light of a hunter. His fingers continued to press against my lips, saying, "You look even more charming when you cry. Hehe, I like it."

As he spoke, he pinched my chin tightly, tilted his head, and began to tentatively kiss me.

His lips brushed against mine, and I trembled all over. I instinctively wanted to push him away, but he continued to tease me relentlessly, his hands covering my breasts, which were tightly bound inside my clothes.

My sobs grew clearer as I struggled between him and the wall, pleading, "Teacher Chen, please, please don't. I'll repay you properly after I get a job."

Chen continued to touch my lips with his, saying wickedly, "But I like immediate repayment, hehe. Don't worry, I won't really touch you, I just want to play with you. Whether you do it or not is up to you. If you don't agree, I'll let you go right now."

Chapter 007. He held back, then raised his head, looking at me wickedly, the flames in his eyes seeming to devour me.

Tears streamed down my face as I murmured, "No, please help me, no."

Chen wasn't in a hurry; he was very patient, continuing to enjoy my pitiful crying. His fingers lingered on my lips, wiping away the tears that dripped into the corners of my mouth, while his other hand circled and pressed on my chest. He said, "Don't be afraid, just do as I say, I won't really touch you, okay?"
I shook my head, looking at him, not understanding what he meant.

He brought his mouth close to my ear and uttered a word.

I trembled with shame, and tears flowed like a waterfall.

He waited a while, and seeing that I was still struggling with my thoughts, he lost patience and began to slip one hand inside my clothes, touching my skin.

My whole body stiffened, and a wave of shame washed over me, but I gritted my teeth and endured it.

His hand groped inside my clothes for a while, and finally skillfully unhooked the bra clasp. My tender breasts fell into his clutches, and I let out a suppressed moan. At that moment, I wished I could faint and forget everything.

His fingers teased and kneaded my nipples, praising them with pleasure, "So tight, feels so good. Looks like you weren't lying, you really haven't been in a relationship yet. Ah, I really want to be inside you completely."
His other hand tried to slip under my skirt, and I nervously grabbed his wrist, resisting, "No, no! I can only accept what you do for me, please."

He cursed, weighed his options, perhaps knowing that if he pushed me too far, I would give up begging and choose to back out, so he stopped trying to slip under my skirt and urgently commanded me, "Alright, hurry up, be sensible, serve me!"

I silently shed tears and obediently knelt down before him. His hands continued to linger on my breasts, kneading my youthful curves, while his other hand lifted my chin, ordering me to look up at him and do it for him.
My eyes were filled with tears, and I couldn't see his sinful face. Trembling, I unzipped his pants.

He groaned, and when I touched him, his body was already hard as stone. It was my first time touching a man's unfamiliar territory; fear, tension, despair overwhelmed me.

I forced myself to obey his demands, suppressing my tears, looking at him pitifully and passively, opening my innocent mouth.

When my tongue touched his sinful touch, he shuddered comfortably, restraining himself as he said, "Great, your little mouth has never been touched by a man before."

I shook my head, wanting only to end this shameful ordeal as quickly as possible, awkwardly following his instructions, moving haphazardly on his body.

Those ten minutes felt like an eternity to me. My mind was completely blank; I couldn't remember exactly how I did it to him, only mechanically moving my lips and tongue, constantly moving my head back and forth.

His hand pressed hard on my head, groaning wickedly, muttering vulgarities, deliberately humiliating my submissive state. Seeing the tears streaming down my face and my grotesque movements brought him immense satisfaction and pleasure.

When that unfamiliar substance finally sprayed mercilessly onto my chest, he breathed heavily with relief, clutching his own guilty body tightly.

I collapsed at his feet, sobbing uncontrollably. He caught his breath for a moment, straightened his clothes, and walked away.
When Hehe sobered up, I was still lying on the ground, silently weeping. During that time, one thought kept replaying in my mind: Die! Die! Die! If I died, I wouldn't have to suffer this humiliation and pain anymore. If I died, I could be with my grandmother and mother.

Hehe weakly rushed to my side, asking what was wrong. "Where's Chen?"

I cried my heart out, telling her what had happened. I said I didn't want to take the exam anymore; I was afraid he would continue to make things difficult for me.

But if I gave up the opportunity to take the civil service exam, what other better way out did I have to change my fate in 2000?

Hehe angrily cursed and cried with me.

But after crying, she firmly said, "You must take the exam!" For ordinary girls like us from small towns, taking the civil service exam is a difficult path, but it might also be a path where we can rise above our circumstances, perhaps even securing a comfortable job and a peaceful life. Changing our cruelly manipulated fate is entirely up to us.

Helplessly, I asked her what to do. How could that Mr. Chen so easily agree to my request?

Hehe gritted her teeth and sneered, "Damn it, looks like I was right to keep this up. That Chen guy usually acts all respectable, but I always sensed a wolf in sheep's clothing in his eyes, and I was right.
If he dares to make a move, we'll fight him to the death!" (

Chapter 008. The Secret Manual of Nourishing Yin and Yang) As she spoke, she turned back to the sofa where she had been lying, picked up her bag, and pulled out a small, spinning tape recorder.

Back then, Hu Hehe had more social experience and was more shrewd in dealing with people than I was. She had actually prepared an ambush beforehand, pressing the record button on the small tape recorder she had prepared in her bag the moment she passed out drunk!

In March 2001, I successfully registered for the provincial organization department's selection examination for civil servants. In April, I took the written exam, somewhat bewildered.

After the exam, I met a girl named Dong Qing. She was beautiful and enthusiastic, and quickly became acquainted with Hehe and me. She bluntly stated that the interview was very important, especially the need to quickly improve one's appearance and demeanor. For those of us without connections or background, taking the exam "unprepared," it was crucial to make a strong impression on the interviewer. She had already paid for a specialized interview coaching class.

Hehe noncommittally said that time was too short, and cultivating good manners wasn't something that could be done overnight. Last-minute cramming probably wouldn't be very effective; it was more important to prepare well for the interview questions.

Hehe's overall qualifications were better than mine. If she didn't succeed in the civil service exam, her father, who worked in the county administration, could help arrange a decent job. But for me, it was a do-or-die situation. I didn't want to lose, and I couldn't afford to lose. I had no better options.

I was fed up with the kind of life Uncle Qiao led, where I gritted my teeth and endured the pain.

During that time, I was obsessed, preparing for job interviews and racking my brains to study the little parchment scroll my grandmother had left me.

At the time, I had no idea how that booklet had come into the Qiao family, nor how to decipher it, because neither my grandmother nor my mother had ever let me directly touch it.

Later, as more people entered my life, I learned about the booklet's history.

Before she passed away, my grandmother said that the reason she wanted me to study the scroll so diligently was because she had no other family left in the world. She didn't want me to live a hard life; she hoped that by studying the scroll, I could prolong my youth, allowing myself to live longer and be more vibrant.

On the evening of April 15, 2001, I opened that mysterious booklet for the first time with a serious attitude. Looking at the pictographic illustrations and symbols that resembled incantations, I felt as if I had been drawn into a wondrous and eerie dream world.

That night, none of the girls in the dormitory were there; some were busy with their impending, passionate love affairs before graduation, others were busy job hunting, and some were doing internships. I was the only one left in the room.

The temperature that night, nearing mid-spring

, was unusually high, as if early summer had arrived. Several single-petaled cherry blossoms outside the third-floor window were in full bloom, like the passionate love of youth. I lay in bed, reading that little booklet. In the warm spring night, my mind was hazy, as if I were in a virtual world, my body and mind no longer my own, my body stirring with the mysterious language of the beginning of all things.

I took off all my clothes and stood by the window. The moonlight shone through, casting a soft glow on my porcelain-like skin.

My eyes were unfocused, my hands roaming over my body, carefully examining my form.

My body, usually wrapped in cheap clothes, was so beautiful, more alluring than the cherry blossoms outside the window. It was just that I usually hid it so well that no one could see its true beauty, not even myself.
Her cone-shaped breasts, like full lotus pods, were elegant and proud, their nipples round and firm, a translucent pink. My fingers touched them, and two currents of electricity, like a stream, flowed into my abdomen, reaching the soles of my feet. I couldn't help but moan softly.

I was so glad that the despicable Chen hadn't seen their true form.

My hand slid from my breasts, tracing the exquisite curves to my abdomen, where it was flat, firm, and inlaid with an oval, teardrop-shaped navel.

My fingers caressed it tenderly, and my whole body convulsed.

For the first time, I realized that touching skin could bring such a wondrous physical sensation.

I didn't have the courage to look into the closed area between my legs. My hand lingered there for a long time before finally shyly withdrawing it. Inside, there was a deep surge and an unspeakable desire.

Chen's sinful body flashed through my mind.

I bit my lower lip tightly, a sharp pain shooting through my heart. I thought, one day, I will take revenge on him!

And on that woman surnamed Xiao.

On the day Chen humiliated me, after returning from the hotel, I ran to the bathroom and gagged for a long time, brushing my teeth for an hour until my gums and lips were swollen.

My pure and beautiful lips, lips that had never even tasted the flavor of love, how could they be so filthyly polluted and desecrated by him?

Starting from the evening of April 15, 2001, I began to diligently study that little sheepskin manual, creating my own breathing techniques, lifting my buttocks and contracting my genitals, tightening my abdomen and anus, and following the instructions in the diagrams to perform acupressure, massage, and pressing on certain meridians and acupoints throughout my body, as well as cultivating subtle emotions in my eyebrows, eyes, and every gesture.

That kind of study was merely a beginner's dabbling.

Later, it proved that the knowledge in that booklet was so vast that I couldn't fathom it. Its seemingly simple diagrams contained profound and mysterious things, which I think I could never fully understand in my entire life.

At that time, I hadn't truly experienced the pleasure between men and women; I was just exploring and pondering in a daze.

It was fate that I didn't go mad.

I made a do-or-die decision: to fully grasp its essence, I had to wait until my virginity was broken for it to be truly effective! Where was the man I was willing to give my virginity to? Who was he?

Over the past ten years, this booklet had brought me not only a complete transformation in appearance and spirit, but also many unexpected benefits…

And if this booklet hadn't fallen into the hands of an honest person like my grandmother, but instead into the hands of an ambitious and unscrupulous individual, the impact on the world would have been a series of disasters.

Sometimes I wonder, should such a mysterious and dangerous thing continue to exist in the world? I'm glad my intelligence isn't very high, glad I only used its beneficial parts.

In 2000, I couldn't have foreseen what that seemingly simple yet incredibly complex booklet would bring me in the years to come…

Chapter 009. On May 12, 2001, Dong Qing asked me to go with her to meet someone in charge of interviews. She said she had finally managed to befriend him, figured out his preferences, and knew he loved to sing and was very talkative once he touched a microphone.

She wanted to go to karaoke with him alone, but felt uneasy. Hu Hehe had told her I had a good voice, so she wanted me to go with her for courage.

I was conflicted, unsure whether to go.

In my twenty years of life experience, I knew nothing about men. My closest man—my father—had passed away when I was six, and I had never had the chance to understand their characteristics firsthand.
I didn't tell Hehe that I was going to accompany Dong Qing to meet Liu, the interviewer. Since the Chen incident, Hehe had rejected such risky private social interactions.

But in just a few months, psychologically, I was no longer the pitiful and foolish Qiao Baobao I had been with Chen.

Dong Qing and I went to a less popular karaoke room to avoid suspicion.

I wore very ordinary clothes, utterly lacking in style or appearance; they made me look like a malnourished country nanny. My hair was deliberately unwashed, like oily, watery noodles, draped over my shoulders, obscuring half my face. My expression was restrained, lacking any of the lively charm of a girl.

After meeting me, Dong Qing insisted on taking me to her place to redo my appearance, forcing me to at least tie my hair up in a ponytail and show my face, which I politely declined with feigned shyness.

I could tell she was very displeased with my appearance, saying that the interviewer wouldn't have a good impression of me at all.

I stayed with her in the private room, and the man finally arrived. I only glanced at him; he looked similar to Chen, also appearing refined and gentlemanly.

I felt somewhat bewildered. No wonder my grandmother, on her deathbed, worriedly said, "Baby, leaving you alone in this world feels like leaving a helpless lamb alone in a wilderness teeming with wolves."

Having witnessed Chen's ugliness, and now facing Liu, I wondered to myself, are all men wolves in sheep's clothing? Including my father, who died because of his infidelity?

Dong Qing enthusiastically recommended my good voice to Liu, but after glancing at me a few times, Liu showed no interest in my drab appearance, his expression revealing displeasure.

Dong Qing, having no other choice, tried to liven things up, smiling sweetly as she drank and talked with Liu, while also giving me knowing glances, urging me to perform well and sing a few songs.

Not wanting to completely dampen Liu's spirits, I grabbed the microphone and chose a few standard, decadent tunes to sing.
The soft female voice, the hazy music, immediately created an ambiguous atmosphere in the dimly lit private room.

Dong Qing sat next to Liu, dressed quite fashionably and professionally; it seemed her paid interview coaching classes had been very effective.

A delicate white blouse hugged her full figure; the blouse was rather tight, and because of her posture, it swayed slightly in the middle, revealing glimpses of her black bra underneath.

She wore a tight, short skirt, her two legs, clad in stockings, were alluringly exposed to Liu's gaze.

As I sang, I caught a glimpse out of the corner of my eye that Liu's hand had intentionally or unintentionally landed on Dong Qing's leg. Her face flushed; she wanted to pull away but dared not, forced to force a smile, her expression somewhat anxious.

A subtle, almost imperceptible smile crept onto my lips. Without making a sound, I sang the song off-key, my voice growing increasingly slurred and low, clearly the result of alcohol poisoning. Finally, I slumped rather ungracefully onto the sofa in the corner of the private room.

I heard Liu chuckle and whisper to Dong Qing, "This is the girl you introduced to me? Bringing a girl like this to meet me is so insincere, isn't it? What are you planning to do? Heh."

Dong Qing's voice softened, "I'm sorry, she... I didn't expect her to be so unpresentable. She's actually quite pretty, and very innocent and cute, she just doesn't know how to dress. You've heard her sing, haven't you? You said you like girls with naturally beautiful voices."

Liu, under the guise of alcohol, started to grope Dong Qing. "I think she's not as innocent and cute as you, heh. I don't want to hear a beautiful voice singing now, I want to hear a beautiful voice moaning. How about it? You invited me here, and she didn't keep me company, so it's your turn?"

Dong Qing struggled in his arms, anxiously protesting, "Please, please don't, we agreed it was you and her..."
Liu had already pinned her to the sofa, panting, "I don't want to be with her, I want to be with you! Do you even want to pass this interview? You went through so much trouble to find me, you should know my power, right? Are you willing to give up halfway?"
Dong Qing was like a small animal caught in a tiger's den, with no way out. She pitifully said, "Please don't be angry, I, of course I want your help, but, I'm not a virgin, she really has never been in a relationship, I, I have a boyfriend, you won't look down on me and back out, will you?"

Chapter 010. Shameless Deal Liu had already torn open her clothes, his mouth on her chest, licking and kissing, saying, "Now, I don't care if you're a virgin or not, you drugged my drink, didn't you? I'm about to explode, you have to take responsibility for putting out this fire!"

Dong Qing whimpered desperately, still making a last futile resistance, but her voice already revealed extreme desire. As her clothes were peeled off in Liu's hands, her struggles turned into suppressed moans.
Lying on the sofa in another corner, I wasn't actually asleep; I witnessed their indecent acts the entire time.

Just now, when they weren't looking, I switched the wine glass Dong Qing had poured for me with hers.
Otherwise, it would probably be me, the innocent one, burning with desire, pinned beneath Liu.

Low, languid music filled the room, but it couldn't mask the rough, labored breathing of the man and woman on the sofa so close to me.

Dong Qing had indeed been in several relationships and was no longer a virgin, so, fueled by the drugged wine, she no longer had the willpower to truly resist Liu's wanton plunder.

I didn't want to witness their shameful behavior, but I couldn't resist my curiosity. Listening to their suppressed moans, it felt as if countless tiny ants were crawling inside me, restlessly burrowing into every crevice, making my bones and nerves feel hot and numb.

I buried my face in the sofa beside me, secretly squinting at Dong Qing.

Liu had ripped open her shirt completely, pushing up her black bra, revealing a pair of round breasts in front of him. His face was buried in them, his lips making sucking and smacking sounds, his hands groping haphazardly all over Dong Qing's body.

I clenched my fists tightly, afraid to make a sound or move, while the throbbing inside me made my whole body feel like it was burning. A hot, itchy stream flowed through my lower abdomen, making my crotch wet and muddy.

Dong Qing's brows furrowed, her red lips parted, and she kept making moaning sounds, her hands weakly running through Liu's hair.

Liu pulled her tight skirt up to her stomach, and I saw him pull off her underwear and throw it on the ground. His strong body spread her legs apart.

Dong Qing obediently wrapped her legs around his waist. Liu's hand reached down, fiddling with his belt for a few moments, then suddenly he thrust his hips down hard, and the two of them let out suppressed moans.

The voice, like a bewitching spell, seeped into my heart, causing my body to spasm. A surge of heat flowed between my legs, and my heart pounded wildly, bewildered by my reaction.

Liu's body began to thrust rapidly against Dong Qing's, his movements vigorous and powerful. Dong Qing was completely captivated by the drug and the man, letting out seductive moans, her mind clouded as she murmured Liu's job title and name, pleading with him to find a way to make things easier for her during her job interview.

Liu, sweating profusely and panting, said, "Don't worry, baby, as long as you behave and let me enjoy you like this often, I won't mistreat you. Damn, it feels so good. I never thought a college student like you could be so alluring." Dong Qing thrust her insatiable body while showering him with flattery and pleasure. The sounds and movements they made made me, trapped on the sofa beside them, almost want to struggle to stay still.

I don't know how long they did it, until Dong Qing seemed to have passed out from being fucked so hard that Liu finally got off her, tidied his clothes, and left.

I continued to lie there pretending to be asleep. Dong Qing slumped on the sofa and rested for a while before struggling to sit up, tidying her messy clothes, and walking over to me. She slapped me a few times rudely and said coldly, "Hey, Qiao Baobao, how long are you going to stay drunk? Honestly, if I had known it would end like this, who would have brought you here?"
I got up from the sofa, casually stuffing something under me into my bag, and pretended to be dazed, rubbing my eyes and saying, "Wasn't I singing? How did I fall asleep? Where's Liu?"

Dong Qing walked out indifferently and said, "He's gone. I didn't expect you to be so unpresentable. I think your interview is definitely over. You're not suited for this path. You should just hurry up and find an ordinary job and live an ordinary life."

I followed her out of the karaoke room, letting her talk, remaining silent.

She was too lazy to talk to me anymore. After reaching the roadside, she went straight to catch a bus and left.

I walked alone to the deserted bus stop, my legs weak and powerless. My skirt was soaked through, as if I were the girl who had just been tormented by the drugged wine.

Back in the empty dormitory, I turned on the small recorder in my bag and pressed play.

Chapter 011. Taking the Initiative The noisy sounds started up again: the mixed breathing of men and women, moans, cries, and obscene conversations.

My body, which hadn't been released, became restless again.

I had learned the trick of recording evidence from Hehe perfectly.

I wasn't sure if it would work, but for me back then, this was the only childish method of espionage I could use.

Hehe once told me that to judge whether someone harbored murderous intent or dark thoughts, you had to be good at capturing fleeting glimpses in their eyes and analyzing the clues revealed in their words.

We may not harbor malicious intentions, but we must learn to be wary of others.

When Dong Qing and Hehe first met me, they were both incredibly warm and cheerful, but feelings are a mysterious thing, and I knew the affection they would give me would be completely different.

Dong Qing wanted to secretly "sell" me to Liu to secure our interviews, but she never expected that I, seemingly from the countryside, would have such a treacherous heart.

Since she was heartless, I had no choice but to be unjust in return.

Listening to the sounds from the tape recorder, I lay on the dark bed, eyes closed, silently and repressively caressing my pure body. My fingers

brushed past my nipples, across my lower abdomen, landing on that mysterious, damp spot.

There, the desire of a young girl always swelled, and my fingers finally couldn't resist touching it.

A surge of heat instantly welled up, and I let out a low moan.

That feeling was bone-chilling, soul-crushing.

On May 13, 2001, before cell phones were widespread, I called Dong Qing from a public phone.

She answered listlessly, seemingly unwilling to talk to me anymore. Just as she was about to hang up, she was startled by the recording I was playing, losing her composure.

She angrily and vehemently questioned me.

But shouldn't I be the one more furious and questioning her? Wasn't her initial intention to sell my virginity to gain favor with Liu?

And now, I've returned the favor in kind. She, as her teacher, should appreciate how well I've learned from her.

In the end, Dong Qing, dejected and filled with remorse, could only compromise.

She dared not tell Liu that she had framed them both and that she had evidence of his infidelity.

She feared that if he retaliated against her, she would be caught in the crossfire.

She could only weakly ask me to promise that once she had dealt with Liu and gotten him to help both of us pass the interviews, I must return the original recording to her.

I said okay, don't worry, I didn't want to create too much trouble or inner turmoil for myself.

She knew I might keep a copy to blackmail her later, but she had already lost the initiative and could only gamble that I wasn't as morally bankrupt as she was.

Dong Qing quickly forgot her frustration at having backfired.

She was smart; she knew that winning me over was better than making me her enemy. We were both vulnerable young women navigating society alone, and having an ally was more advantageous than having an enemy.

At the beginning of our lives, we quickly became more complex and mature.

In just two days, I don't know how she managed to win over that hypocritical and sanctimonious Liu, but in any case, Dong Qing and I both passed the interview on May 16, 2001.
After passing all the medical examinations and reviews, we just waited for our specific job assignments. Dong Qing, Hu Hehe, and I celebrated with drinks, and I secretly gave her the tape.

Dong Qing, emboldened by the alcohol, laughed and cried, half-jokingly saying, "Baby, I have high hopes for you! I didn't expect this, haha. I like making friends with smart people. Let's forget everything from before. From now on, we should still help each other."

She knew I might still have leverage over her copy of the tape. Without enough animosity and conflicting interests, perhaps we could truly continue to be friends peacefully, as she said, helping each other.
Hehe didn't understand the meaning behind Dong Qing's words, and said casually, "Okay, we'll stick together through thick and thin, and be soulmates. I wish you both become outstanding female cadres in the future, cheers!"

Hehe didn't pass the interview, so she chose to return to her hometown county and take an ordinary job—a low starting point, but a safe one. Her motivation for applying for the provincial selection exam was different from mine; she genuinely wanted to make a name for herself on the political stage.

Whether then or now, I believe that my dear friend Hu Hehe has the ability, that she is just as capable as any man, and that she has an innate sense of justice. If society could employ more people like her to take on positions that benefit the nation and its people, I believe our country would be prosperous and strong.
However, reality always contradicts our simple thoughts.

After drinking, Dong Qing got completely drunk and cried, saying that she genuinely wanted to thank me. If it weren't for my interference, she wouldn't have been willing to break up with her boyfriend of three years.

Through this civil service exam experience, she had to painfully admit that she and her boyfriend were incompatible, and it was better to break up sooner rather than later. He was a guy without much ambition, only wanting a simple, ordinary life. Their values were bound to diverge, and in crucial moments, she couldn't count on him for even a fraction of what he was worth.

Chapter 012. Encountering the male town mayor, I whispered in her ear, "Qing'er, I sincerely hope you don't fall too deep into a man like Liu. We've used him once, that's enough, you understand what I mean?"

Dong Qing looked at the city night sky with a dazed expression and murmured, "I understand, but, baby, most of the time, we'll be powerless to control our own destiny."

Hehe returned to her hometown town ahead of time. We parted in tears at the station. She hugged me tightly, saying repeatedly, "Don't keep things to yourself, you must tell me, I'll help you make decisions."

I just cried. At that moment, I truly felt that there was no one I could trust or rely on anymore, and I had truly become a lonely little lamb in the wilderness.

So many years have passed, and I'm now quite adept at my career. But often, like the fragile and indecisive Qiao Baobao of yesteryear, I call Hu Hehe, who lives far away in X County, to confide in her when I'm too exhausted to go on.

She always brings me the positive energy I need.

On July 22, 2001, I returned to my hometown village to pay respects at the graves of my maternal grandparents, parents, and other relatives.

Uncle Qiao Zhuang and Aunt Qiao Zhuang, with their young grandson, lived in the few small, dilapidated rooms of my house, resiliently and resignedly continuing to work in the fields, living a seemingly hopeless life.

I heard that Xiao Xiaofeng had gone to the county town to become the mistress of an old Taiwanese man.

I stroked Qiqi's little head and gently said, "Qiqi, Auntie must make something of herself and avenge your father."

I walked away from the village again, heading towards the town bus station.

Passing by Fu Shi's house in the village of town, I stood on the street, staring at the door for a moment, my heart filled with the melancholy of the last days of adolescence.

I heard he went to work in the city after graduating from junior high school, and I never heard from him again.

In school, he only flirted with pretty and flirtatious girls. The ugly duckling-like Qiao Baobao certainly never appeared in his memory.

Who could have imagined that years later, we would meet again in such a high-profile manner…

On July 26, 2001, I and a group of selected graduates reported to the Provincial Party Committee Organization Department and the Personnel Bureau. On August 3, I was assigned to Liuchuan Town, a township under W City, which is under the jurisdiction of S City.

Dong Qing was assigned to a street office in W City.

I don't know if her destination was related to Liu. Although W City is only a county-level city, it's still a small city, and Dong Qing's starting point was higher than mine.

Liuchuan Town is located in a mountainous area, and those days were spent on flood relief efforts. No one came to pick me up and take me there. I wanted to settle down as quickly as possible, so I took a bus to that unfamiliar town.

The bus stopped about three miles from the town government seat because the road ahead had been washed away by the flood, and large buses couldn't pass.

I carried my simple luggage, dragging a suitcase, along the deserted mountain road...

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