Damn, it's hopeless.

page views:1 Publication date:2019-02-15

All my efforts during the entire Chinese New Year period were in vain. My wife—or rather, my ex-wife—although we haven't finalized the divorce, she's no longer living at home.
Yesterday, she came back to pick up some things, and we had our final conversation. It was peaceful, yet quite sad, at least for me.
The final result was that we'll temporarily separate, each trying to get through this period calmly for three months. If it doesn't work out, we'll finalize the divorce; if it still works out, we'll continue, but neither of us is allowed to mention what happened during this time.
I don't know if it's because I love her too deeply, or if I feel sorry for her, but after this conversation, I'm even more depressed, and my outlook on life has been somewhat shaken. Let me share my thoughts with you.
To be honest, I'm definitely considered open-minded. Actually, I don't have any aversion to extramarital sex; I just feel it has to be worthwhile.
There are a few things I still don't understand: 1. Why did she still leave after I was so tolerant of her? We've both had extramarital sex, but it was just sex; it shouldn't have affected our marital relationship at all, right? 2. My sexual ability and physique are still pretty good; how come she suddenly lost interest in me and couldn't satisfy her anymore? 3. Although I don't believe it, my wife swears that she seduced that old bastard. It happened last summer at a dinner party at her school; my wife and he were both there. The old man said he had a cold and couldn't drink, so she drank for him. She drank too much, and the old man drove her home. She had sex with him in his car, right there in the parking lot outside our apartment complex. 4. That old bastard, he's got some nerve, isn't he afraid I'll go to the school and cause trouble, ruin his reputation?
Has his IQ just disappeared? I just can't understand it.

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Damn, it's hopeless.

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