Sex, Emotion, Love

page views:1 Publication date:2023-08-20冻龄夫

Men and women are the same.
Men can experience primal sexual desire for a woman because of her beauty, sexiness, allure, charm, fame, power, wealth, good health, captivating black hair, graceful figure, full figure, seductiveness, or ability to flirt.
Women are no different.
A woman can feel primal sexual desire for a man because he is handsome, sexy, charismatic, famous, powerful, rich, healthy, has black hair, a strong physique, is muscular, lustful, or knows how to flirt.
Its essence is sexual desire, but people are brainwashed by literature, movies, TV shows, and songs, and this sexual desire is then processed by the brain into a kind of lust. But at its core it is still sexual desire, but it is not love, it is not romantic love.
First, I want to explain why it seems that women are generally more reserved and less likely to enjoy sexual relationships.
Actually, this wasn't always the case. For example, during the Spring and Autumn and Warring States periods, people freely engaged in lavish banquets, group sex, and open sexual activity; the social atmosphere was extremely unrestrained. Women didn't feel guilty or ashamed for pursuing sexual gratification.
It was only because the Qin Dynasty unified China and the Han Dynasty established itself that the distorted version of Confucianism was adopted, leading to a theocracy. Through continuous indoctrination and brainwashing, women were told that sex was dirty and shameful, which suppressed their sexual desires for over 2000 years. They were made to believe that they had to be virgins from the start and could only be loyal to one man, or else they would be drowned in a pig cage...
This was a necessary sacrifice and objectification of women by the state at the time to facilitate its autocratic rule.
Now it's the 21st century, and women's sexual awareness is slowly awakening. Therefore, many women are gradually returning to a natural and innocent state, rather than a state of so-called brainwashing. A natural and innocent state means—sex, affection, and love are all possible, naturally and simply, without immense psychological pressure. Under the premise of protecting privacy and ensuring safety and health, everyone can simply and openly enjoy a relationship they desire, regardless of whether it's sex, affection, or love; they are all beautiful. From this perspective, they cannot be passive behaviors of helplessness or compromise; otherwise, they become a form of coercion.
Of course, there is a risk of pregnancy for women, which is an obstacle, but modern contraceptive technology has solved this problem very well. Women can perfectly enjoy the experience of sex, but they must find someone who satisfies their sexual or emotional desires.
Next, I will explain to you one by one
the relationship between sex, emotion, and love.
Let me start by using men as an example.
Most men also misunderstand this, mistakenly believing that this sexual desire is love.
But after actually having sex with this woman, his sexual desire disappears, and only then does he realize that he doesn't like this woman; he just wanted to sleep with her.
He went through so much trouble to get into bed with this girl, only to find out in the end that he was merely trying to satisfy his own sexual desires, mistakenly believing that he actually liked her.
Most men, lacking strong self-awareness, cannot accurately distinguish between sexual desire, lust, and love. They can only know whether they truly like a girl after their sexual desire has subsided. Of course, with more experience, they will gradually learn what kind of woman they want.
In other words, they don't know what they want; they're deceived by their own imagined desires. Even though lust is a sublimation of sexual desire, at its core it's still sexual desire. But this isn't love; compared to reproductive urges, it's merely a higher-level desire.
Only after the desire is satisfied and temporarily subsides after sex does he calm down and settle down. Only then can he clearly judge whether the woman beside his bed is someone he truly loves.
If you still like her, it means there's a certain element of lust involved; if you don't like her, it's just sexual desire; if you like her very much and have a strong desire to be with her for life and live alone, then it's very likely love.
In other words, based on the shared characteristic of sex, the relationship between men and women can be roughly divided into three types: friends with benefits, lovers, and spouses.
A spouse is primarily based on affection, with sex as a secondary element; a lover is primarily based on sex, with affection as a secondary element; and a friends with benefits is purely based on sex.
Sex, passion, and love are three forces. Sex is simply the pure satisfaction of sexual desire. Passion is when you like a woman because of certain qualities she possesses, but she may not meet your requirements in other aspects of her personal value. Love, on the other hand, is naturally about mutual compatibility, uniqueness, and a worthy opponent.
Everything boils down to two words:
Worth it.
The foundation of love lies in whether this woman is worth investing in.
Besides her figure and looks, does she possess an interesting soul, a profound mind, a tender heart that understands the art of living, and a sensual intellect?
If something is worthwhile, then it might be a lover; if it's very worthwhile, then it's possible to have love; if it's not worthwhile at all, then even a friend with benefits isn't necessary.
Okay, if that's the case , then
a man's friends with benefits, lovers, and partners must all be women, right?
Therefore, by the same logic, we can deduce that women's relationships are the same as men's.
They also have three types:
friends with benefits, lovers, and partners.
Everything boils down to two words:
Worth it.
But how much thought, how much time and energy is worth investing in this man? How much emotion is worth it? Or is it simply a matter of mutual benefit?
Women also consider a man's overall worth.
For example, besides having things that arouse sexual desire, does this man also have talent, intellect, depth, knowledge, a strong inner self, kindness, gratitude, tolerance, and ambition? Is he capable of being devoted to one another, understanding, and sharing the same values? Does he have money? Is he humorous? Is he healthy?
When she determines that a man is worthy of her love, she will elevate her feelings to the level of love and then gradually put them into practice.
So-called love is giving, helping others grow, restraint, and self-discipline. It's like the care and attention you give your child.
This is because you know the sacrifice is worthwhile and brings joy.
That's true love, built on unconditional acceptance, tolerance, and forgiveness of flaws .
But if it's just about feelings and sex, you can't fully accept or tolerate it.
That's why you can't introduce him to your best friends—because you know he's not presentable, he can't be taken out in public, he can't satisfy your vanity, he can't share your life, and he can't build a family with you.
At this point, love is no longer purely a physiological desire; it has evolved into a human exploration and pursuit of spiritual elevation and the art of living. This is why love exists only in humans, while animals only have sexual desire and a trace of lust—things ingrained in their natural genes out of the instinct for reproduction (with the exception of a few spiritual animals).
Because they lack love in a complete social sense.
Only humans possess such a great and noble spirit as love. It is a product of a society's advanced development to a certain stage, an inevitable result of good human education, an implementation of a beautiful ideal, a practice of a firm belief, and, more importantly, a realistic pursuit of the progressive power to transcend oneself.
I love you because I want you to become a better person, and you love me for the same reason. We're together to help each other become better people.
Even if you leave, I will still be grateful to you, because after having this relationship with you, I became a more mature woman or man.

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