The truth in the shadows

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-19 08:12:52

The Truth Under the Shadows

(Chapter 1)

The plane jolted, jolting me awake. Outside the window, all I could hear was darkness and the deafening roar of the engines. We must have encountered turbulence. Many passengers were awakened, their whispers making it impossible for me to close my eyes again.

I opened my backpack, intending to take out some chewing gum to rinse my mouth, but my eyes accidentally fell on the bright red wedding invitation. I hesitated slightly, then opened it and looked at it carefully again. Yes! Today, my mother was getting married, to spend the rest of her life with another man, while I was being sent tens of thousands of miles away. How could I not be heartbroken!

I had cried and begged, unwilling to leave Taiwan, but my grandmother and mother both said in unison:
"Go! Go abroad to broaden your horizons, get a diploma, it'll be a good dowry."

What a joke! Studying is for a diploma? A diploma is a dowry? If that's the case, I'd rather never marry! But whenever I think of my mother's experiences, my heart softens. She raised me with great difficulty, supporting me on a meager salary, barely able to afford clothes for herself, yet allowing me to study and grow without worries. Now that she has found happiness, how can I stop her?

Perhaps it's a deep-seated jealousy for my father, I think! My mother has a naturally beautiful face and figure; even at forty, she remains radiant and captivating. Walking next to her, she looks like an older sister.

I am twenty-one years old this year. My father died in a car accident when I was in first grade. I remember my mother often kneeling before my father's memorial tablet late at night, weeping. At the time, I didn't understand. I was often awakened by her sobs, and I could only hide behind the door, secretly shedding tears. My heart was inexplicably stirred by my mother's grief. I didn't understand who I was crying for—my father in the photograph? Or my mother silently shedding tears?

The wedding invitation gradually blurred, and tears unconsciously welled up in my eyes. I quickly took a deep breath, swallowing the soreness in my throat, and blew out my pent-up grievances and sorrow through a tissue.

In a few hours, I would arrive at Vienna International Airport. My mood shifted from sadness to fear. I was afraid of the new environment because I didn't know what kind of life I would face.

My mother had arranged for me to stay temporarily at an aunt's house. I had never met this so-called aunt before. I wondered if she would be easy to get along with. Would she stand me up?

Pushing my luggage, I looked around for the aunt who might come to pick me up. I looked around disappointedly. She hadn't come. Why hadn't anyone come to greet me? I was so anxious that tears were about to spill over when I suddenly saw a man in the distance holding a sign that read "{Lü Huan}"...

He had also been looking around for a while. Strange! How come I hadn't seen him holding the sign? Perhaps I had a preconceived notion, subconsciously assuming that the aunt would come.

I quickly pushed the stroller towards him, and he happened to see me rushing around and walked towards me.

"Are you Miss Lü Huan?"

I nodded timidly. "Excuse me, why didn't Aunt Fang come to pick me up?"

He took the stroller from me and said with a smile, "She's busy! So she sent me. Don't worry, come on, I'll take you to her place first."

I obediently followed him to the parking lot, put my luggage down, and got in the car. He introduced himself humorously, saying his surname was Guo and his name was Jiaming. He patiently described the buildings and scenery along the highway. I was getting sleepy listening to him. Because of the time difference and the fact that I hadn't slept much on the plane, my eyes were glazed over, and I felt dizzy and lightheaded. I accidentally fell asleep. I didn't wake up until the car stopped in front of a villa.

"Have we arrived...?"

Aunt Fang was my mother's high school classmate, the kind of strong woman who was an accountant and ran an accounting firm in Vienna. She also worked as a translator, so she was very busy. I believed her income must be considerable. I just didn't dare ask about her marital status because her house, besides her, only had me, so it was very spacious and comfortable. I was very satisfied and grateful for her arrangements for my life.

The first time I met her was the afternoon I got off the plane. She rushed back from the office, and as soon as she saw me, she smiled brightly and said,

"Good girl! You've grown so much... Come here! Let me take a good look at you."

I obediently walked to her side and respectfully called out, "Aunt Fang."

She patted my shoulder and observed my appearance closely. Her eyes were gentle and certain as she said,
"You look just like your father!"

Me? Really? I didn't think so, but everyone who had seen my father said I looked like him. I didn't know why, so I didn't argue. Maybe it was because I was living under someone else's roof that I had suppressed my true personality.

Time didn't slow down just because I was busy adapting to my new life and new language. Before I knew it… I'd been here for two months. Under Aunt Fang's arrangement, I was studying language in a university language class. We usually met at dinner or before bed. Every time she looked at me, I felt an inexplicable warmth and a strange pressure, because her eyes were so sorrowful, so full of emotion. I often couldn't help but want to ask her what was wrong. But whenever the words reached my lips, I would swallow them back because of my reason.

Once, she told me that she had divorced a few years ago and didn't have children. She said she didn't have time to raise them at the time, so she didn't have any.

Now, all alone, she deeply regrets her decision back then. Therefore, she naturally sees me as her support and center of attention. For example, when I first arrived, it was just autumn, and the clothes I brought from Taiwan were completely unsuitable for the climate. She painstakingly bought me a whole bunch of clothes, which she gave me. I was embarrassed and wanted to refuse, but she took it for granted, saying,

"Making money is for spending! If I don't spend it on you, do you expect me to support a gigolo?"

I really can't see her supporting a gigolo, because her private life is very discreet; I've never seen her bring any man home. Of course! I don't know much about her outside, but Aunt Fang gave me the impression of being very self-disciplined and virtuous. So, over the two months I've spent with her, I've gradually come to like and accept her, much like I like my own mother. Thus, Aunt Fang and I have slowly developed a mother-daughter-like relationship. I genuinely care for her and am considerate of her. Often, when she comes home late and I can't find her, I leave notes in her room or simply sleep in her room. By the time she gets home, I'm usually fast asleep.

But tonight, as I left the note and was about to go back to my room, I heard the door slam shut. I rushed downstairs and saw the walk-in closet—bags, coats, shoes—scattered haphazardly everywhere. As I tidied up the mess, I heard retching sounds coming from the bathroom. She'd been drinking, definitely!

I thought she might be drunk, so I boiled some water to make her a cup of hot tea to sober her up. But she didn't come out for a while, so I rushed to the bathroom. There she was, sitting on the floor, her clothes disheveled, tears streaming down her face. I helped her up:

"Aunt Xin...did you drink too much?"

She resisted, shaking off my hand and almost screaming, "Don't touch me!! Don't touch me!!"
I was startled and took several steps back, unable to believe she would yell at me like that. I went back to her, squatted down, and tentatively touched her arm. This time, she was much calmer and no longer resisted. I silently tried to pull her up, but she couldn't stand.

I had to use all my strength to lift her up from under her armpits, then let her lean against my chest. I held her tightly, half-dragging, half-carrying her from the bathroom to the sofa in the living room. After she lay down, she was completely unconscious.
I went upstairs to get a blanket and covered her up. Suddenly, two tears streamed down her closed eyes. I didn't know if she was awake or dreaming, so I reached out and wiped the tears from her face. She suddenly gripped my hand tightly and slowly opened her eyes.

"Huanhuan~"

she choked out, tears falling again. I knelt beside her, my hand on her forehead, gently brushing away the fine hairs.

"Aunt Xin, are you feeling better? What happened? Seeing you cry like this makes me feel bad too!"
She sat up and pulled back the blanket. "Get me a glass of water... I'm so thirsty..."

I immediately ran to the kitchen and brought her the hot tea I had just brewed. Watching her drink the lukewarm tea, my mood seemed to calm down a bit.

"Huanhuan... I'm sorry..."

I looked at her with pity and said, "It's okay, you're just drunk, it's not good for your health!"

She continued drinking her tea, her eyes unfocused, filled with helplessness and sorrow. "I ran into a pervert today! He almost ate me!"

I looked at her in surprise, waiting for her to continue.

"Huanhuan, I didn't actually drink that much, my head is perfectly clear. It's just that that jerk drugged my drink while I was in the restroom!"

This time, I wasn't just shocked, I almost fainted! "How could this happen! How could you be with someone like that?"
She shook her head helplessly. "He's my client. He invited me to dinner tonight, saying he wanted to discuss the year-end surplus."
She picked up the cigarettes on the table, took out two, and handed one to me. We lit them at the same time, took a deep drag, and steadied ourselves.

"After dinner, it wasn't late, and he suggested going to a bar to continue the conversation. I agreed without any suspicion, who knew he was such a well-dressed beast!"

I could roughly imagine what had happened. "How did you escape?"

She took another deep drag of her cigarette and slowly exhaled.

"I was dizzy and felt something was wrong. I was already in his car, and I thought he wouldn't go too far, but he actually reached out and touched me, moving his hand inward from the inside of my thigh. I resisted and pushed his hand away, but... I couldn't muster any strength!"

I stubbed out my cigarette and stood up angrily.

"Damn it! How could there be such a shameless guy! I'll get someone to castrate him!"

She continued, "In desperation, I unbuckled my seatbelt, opened the car door, and fell out of the car. Many pedestrians on the street came to help me. I asked the bystanders for help to call the police. I was still dazed. The police arrived quickly, asked for details, and then brought me back." I widened my eyes.
"That was dangerous! What if you had been hit by a car behind you after jumping out of the car?"

She shook her head with a bitter face. "Being hit by a car is better than being violated by that beast, right?!"

I unconsciously walked towards her, put my hand on her shoulder, and patted it gently.

"So, what are you going to do about this beast's accounts?" She paused for a moment after my question, then considered for a few seconds.
"He has a lot of dirt on him in his office. I'm going to hand it over to the tax bureau and make him regret it.
" I had a bad feeling. "Forget it, Aunt Xin. We can't afford to mess with people like that. Aren't you worried he might use some vicious tactics to retaliate like this?"

She looked at me and smiled bitterly. "Huanhuan, I've lived this long and never suffered like this before. If I don't retaliate, I won't be satisfied, but... I'm worried about you..."

I remained silent. She continued,

"Maybe we should just consider it a lesson and an experience. I think we should listen to you and let it go!"

I smiled and seized the opportunity to ask, "Aunt Xin...you...you..."

She was confused by my hesitation. "What? You, you, I, I."

I mustered my courage and said, "Why do you always look at me with a...uh...how should I put it, a little strange?"

She looked at me in surprise, picked up a cigarette, lit it again, and after a few minutes, she finally spoke:
"Your mother never mentioned why she arranged for you to come here?"

I shook my head vigorously and lit another cigarette like her, taking a deep, greedy drag, waiting for her answer.

"It happened many years ago. Back then, your mother and I were younger than you are now!"

I nodded doubtfully and pulled her upstairs. She paused for a moment. "I'm not going to work tomorrow, what about you?"
I shook my head and smiled, "Tomorrow is Saturday, Aunt Xin~"

My eyes widened in realization... "Oh! Right... Saturday..."

In Aunt Xin's room. She was reclining on the bed, and I was sitting on the double sofa by the window. "Let's continue. What did you say about you and Mom?"

She cleared her throat. "Well, we were classmates and very close, until our senior year of high school, when your father appeared, and our brotherly friendship started to crack."

I wondered, "Why? You both fell for my father?"

She shook her head. "Your father originally wanted to pursue me, but because of the pressure of the college entrance exam, I couldn't accept it and couldn't bear to reject him, so... we remained just friends. And your mother, because of her family circumstances, couldn't continue her university studies, so she became the messenger between me and your father. At that time, your father was an assistant engineer at a construction company." Every day after school, I had to stay at school for extracurricular tutoring, which was basically a form of remedial education. Your mother would take the letters for me and take the bus to your father's company to deliver them to him.
I asked curiously, "Why didn't you put stamps on them and have the postman deliver them?"

She said helplessly, "The times were different. Back then, our parents were very strict. How could we send love letters home? So, I had to ask your mother. That's how we corresponded for about four months. After graduating from school, I was preparing for college entrance exams and didn't have the extra energy to continue communicating with your father through letters. So, your mother wrote them for me. It wasn't until after I finished my exams, the results were released, and I invited them both out to celebrate that I realized things had escalated to a point I couldn't handle!"

I nodded to encourage her to continue, "Your mother almost knelt down and begged me, but your father stopped her because she was pregnant."

I stared wide-eyed in disbelief, and she nodded.

"Yes, that's right! It's you. So I struggled with love and friendship for a long time, and finally, I decided to leave them, although... I still love your father so much."

I never knew about my parents' past. In my memory, they were a loving couple, only separated by misfortune.

"Then... what happened to you afterwards?"

"I didn't go to university in Taiwan. I saved up enough money for travel and went directly to Germany to stay with my uncle. I worked and studied with him until after you were born. Then I received a letter from your father. The letter was nothing more than an apology and good news, and he also mentioned his life with your mother. He said they were not living a stable life and hoped that I could put aside the unpleasant past and contact them, otherwise they would feel very guilty. I stubbornly refused to contact them because I hadn't recovered yet. After all, he was my first love. Who knew that this anger would lead to something terrible! When I received your mother's letter in Vienna, I regretted it so much that I almost jumped into the Danube to commit suicide!!"

I gradually understood. "Aunt Xin, did you go back to Taiwan to attend my father's funeral?"

She replied, "Of course I remember! I dropped everything and flew back to Taiwan. When I saw your parents again, it felt like a lifetime had passed. One was crying her heart out, and the other was lying in a coffin. You were only seven years old then, right? Don't you remember me?"
I thought and thought, but I couldn't remember, so I shook my head.

"Later, because of your father's sudden passing, your mother and I resumed our relationship. Thinking about it, women are really strange creatures. Their bond is closer than that of siblings, yet they can go years without contacting each other for a man!"
I said with a grin, "So... is it because I look like your father that you have such strange eyes?"
Unexpectedly, she blushed. "You really do look exactly like him!! He's lying in the ground now, who else would he look at if not you?"

I then playfully asked, "Did you get married before or after my father passed away?"

She didn't react for a moment and thought for a few seconds.

"I got married very late, when I was thirty, and divorced after three years. I didn't even have time to have a child. I really envy your mother, she's still so young, while you're already an adult."

I protested, "You're younger! Really, you haven't had children, and you're so petite, you look more like my older sister. I'm not trying to flatter you, I'm telling you the truth!!"

Aunt Xin squinted and smiled broadly, "You're so sweet-talking, you can even coax the birds down from the trees!"
(Chapter Two)

After last night's long talk, it seemed that there was no longer any barrier between Aunt Xin and me. And after learning about their past love triangle, I admired Aunt Xin's courage and magnanimity even more. After all, I'm not her biological daughter, I'm just the child of her former first love and her best friend. What she has done for me is truly beyond words! I even doubted whether I had a heart, because at this moment, I completely sympathized with Aunt Xin's position and situation!

Life continued as usual, the sun still rose, the moon still waxed and waned. Christmas passed quickly, and the New Year was just around the corner. I had passed my language course exam, and starting next year, I could officially begin my elective courses. During this time, Guo Jiaming, the man who had picked me up at the airport, had served as my last-minute "cram school" tutor before the exams. So, Aunt Xin invited him and all the employees of her accounting firm to spend New Year's Eve at her home.

I had asked about Guo Jiaming before, and Aunt Xin said,

"That young man was ambitious, so I let him work part-time at the firm and study. He also learned something from me. After graduation, he went on to get a doctorate, so now he's my right-hand man! He handles most of the firm's affairs."

I was a little pleased, because even with his busy schedule, he volunteered to tutor me. I thought, he must have other motives.

I'd met Guo Jiaming a few times since picking him up from the airport, but it was always because Aunt Xin invited him to her house to discuss tax matters. I rarely had the chance to talk to him. Initially, I didn't feel anything for him. However, every time I saw his expression while discussing business with Aunt Xin, I couldn't help but glance at him a few more times. He was steady and reliable, humorous yet elegant. So when he volunteered to tutor me, I was overjoyed for days. But… I really disliked his rigid manner when tutoring. In other words… our "alone" time didn't progress at all. The romantic love I longed for didn't materialize.

On New Year's Eve afternoon, Aunt Xin hired a Chinese chef and a Western chef to prepare the entire New Year's Eve buffet. I was busy decorating the living room and dining room, and getting ready. Aunt Xin, seeing me running around like a headless chicken, happily hugged me.

"Huanhuan, this is our first New Year!"

I grinned foolishly. "Don't worry, when you're old, I'll still pester you for red envelopes!"

The atmosphere was joyful, and everyone was in high spirits. Aunt Xin and I were busy and happy. As dinner time approached, the guests gradually arrived. I took the opportunity to go back to my room, put on the evening gown I had prepared, and styled my long hair into a bun. After carefully checking myself in the mirror, I went downstairs satisfied.

Downstairs, almost all the guests had arrived, and the chef had already laid out all sorts of delicacies on the dining table. Aunt Xin then announced that dinner would be a buffet, and asked the guests not to be shy and to enjoy themselves.

As soon as I went downstairs, my eyes involuntarily kept looking for Guo Jiaming. He was chatting and laughing with a young lady! I felt a surge of displeasure, but pretending not to see him, I didn't even say hello and started drinking champagne.
Aunt Xin, weaving through the crowd, didn't notice that I was already flushed from drinking. Grabbing my drink, I simply slipped into the kitchen and drank to my heart's content! It wasn't until Aunt Xin came to the kitchen looking for something and saw me drinking alone that she asked in surprise,
"What's wrong, Huanhuan?"

I was already half-drunk; drinking on an empty stomach makes you drunk faster. I grinned and said:

"No! It's New Year's Eve, let's drink to our hearts' content!"

Aunt Xin snatched the wine glass from my hand. "Crazy girl, I haven't seen you eat anything, why are you drinking so much! Come on! Let 's go eat something."

She pulled me towards the door, but I gently pushed her hand away. "I want to drink, okay? Give me back my glass!"
Aunt Xin helplessly handed the glass back to me. "What's wrong with you? You were fine this afternoon!"

I waved my hand. "Go ahead and do your work! Don't mind me, I'll go back to my room by myself when I'm drunk."

She shook her head. "There are a lot of guests today, please have mercy, instead of helping out, you're hiding here drinking."
I looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry..."

She patted me tenderly. She patted my shoulder. "Never mind! You figure it out yourself. I'm going out now."

After she left, I took a bottle of Italian red wine from the kitchen wine cabinet, ready to open it and drink it alone,
when someone barged in.

"Why were you hiding! I couldn't find you!"

I looked up and saw Guo Jiaming standing in the kitchen doorway. "Hehe~~ I'm happy, it's New Year's Eve!"

He walked closer to me, took the red wine and corkscrew from my hand, opened the wine, poured two glasses, and handed one to me. "Are you in a bad mood? Missing home?"

I took the wine and gulped down a big mouthful. "Missing home? Haha, I forgot about it until you mentioned it."
"Don't drink so fast, you'll get drunk!"

I picked up the bottle and filled my glass again. "Come on! Cheers, Happy New Year!!"

He raised his glass and said, "Happy New Year!"

We looked at each other, and I downed my drink in one gulp. He quickly snatched my glass away.

"What's wrong with you! You keep chugging, this isn't the way to get drunk."

I smiled at him, but actually, I was already dizzy...

"I... I've had enough, I'm going upstairs to sleep..."

I stood up, but lost my balance and almost fell. He immediately helped me up.

"I'll help you upstairs, you can barely walk!"

I shook him off and walked step by step towards the door. He grabbed me again. I lost my balance and fell into his arms.

He held me tightly, and I tried to break free. "Let go of me! Let go of me! I can walk by myself!"

He picked me up and carried me outside. "Shh! Don't make a sound, do you want all the guests to hear?"

I was already in a daze; the alcohol was quickly taking effect, and I was feeling drowsy. So, I didn't make a fuss and let him carry me upstairs. When we got to my room, he had me lie down and covered me with a blanket. Just as he was about to leave, I started vomiting, dry heaving, but nothing came out. I was dizzy and saw him still standing there.
"You... go! Why aren't you leaving?"

He found a trash can and placed it next to my bed, saying in a low voice, "Want to throw up? It'll feel better if you throw up."
I didn't have the strength to shoo him away. I closed my eyes and quickly passed out from the effects of the alcohol. I didn't wake up until the middle of the night, extremely thirsty. I tried to get up to find a glass of water and immediately saw the note he had left on the dressing table.

(Huan:

You've really acted out of character today. I don't know what's wrong, but you're drowning your sorrows in alcohol. How about I pick you up for dinner tomorrow night at 7 pm? Please contact me: tel 0699/ 2468100)

After reading the note, I recalled how I had recklessly downed alcohol without asking any questions. I felt terrible and regretted my outburst! Tomorrow night—no, tonight! He invited me to dinner. What did he want to say? What did he want to explain? Or was it just friendly concern? I was annoyed that I fell asleep on our first meeting, and even more ashamed that I was so drunk I could barely walk. But I vaguely remember him holding me tightly, and when I stumbled, he deliberately held me close. Why? If he felt the same way, why didn't he act on it? Was he bothered by something? Or was it nothing at all, just the concern of an older brother for a younger girl?

===

...

"Huanhuan, tell the truth, don't stammer. You stutter when you lie, and your face looks off!"
I looked at her, my face flushed. "Oh! No, don't ask, okay!"

I turned to go upstairs, but she stopped me. "Is it because of Guo Jiaming?"

I almost fell down the stairs in a panic. I was speechless... awkwardly staring at Aunt Xin.

"I saw the note he left in your room. Are you going or not?"

I slowly walked back to the living room, picked up a cigarette from the table, lit it, and took a deep drag.

"I don't know, because... I don't know what he's thinking."

Aunt Xin thought for a few seconds. "Go! He's a good prospect. As far as I know, he has a good impression of you! You should try harder, otherwise, with his looks, there are plenty of women waiting in line!"
I took a deep drag on my cigarette, feeling both angry and anxious thinking about the ladies surrounding him last night.

"He's so popular, why should I join the fun! It's not like I don't have suitors, I'm not going! I'm not going!"
Aunt Xin said with a half-smile, "Silly girl! If he didn't have any special feelings for you, would he volunteer to tutor you? Think about it again, is he even worth dating? If he really made any frivolous moves when you were alone, I think... you wouldn't fall for him, would you?"

Wow! A few words and she'd summed up my feelings perfectly, truly a seasoned veteran!
"Then... what should I do?"

Aunt Xin finally chuckled and said,

"There's nothing to do. Just let nature take its course. What's meant to come will come, and what's not meant to come won't come no matter how hard you try."
I asked naively, "What will come? What should come? What won't come?"

This time, Aunt Xin burst into laughter, laughing until tears streamed down her face. "You've really never had a boyfriend?"
I was taken aback for a moment, then said matter-of-factly,

"Yes, of course I have! I just don't understand what you mean by 'coming' and 'not meant to come.'"

She stopped laughing and said seriously, "..."

"Tell me honestly, did your ex-boyfriends... ever touch you?"

I chuckled awkwardly. "Yes, kissing, hugging, of course they did!"

Aunt Xin looked at me suspiciously. "I'm asking you, are you still a virgin?"

I suddenly realized what she meant, my face flushed with embarrassment. "I... um... I still am."

Aunt Xin looked at me in surprise. "You're such a silly girl! You've got me completely confused! Since that's the case, just follow your feelings, let things happen naturally. I can't teach you how to handle this kind of thing." Because when two people are in a relationship for a certain period of time, they will naturally find themselves "unable to avoid" the bed. This allows their feelings to be further expressed and released through sex. This is a primal human desire. So, don't be shy. Every woman goes through this stage. The difference is whether you follow your feelings or your reason. That's all.

I seemed to have a sudden realization. "Then... how do you find a balance between emotion and reason?"

Aunt Xin lowered her head and considered carefully for a moment, then picked up a cigarette, lit it, and took a deep, greedy drag.

"Let me think about it before I answer you, because I'm often more rational than emotional. So, I can't answer your question right now. Maybe you'll find the answer yourself. Everyone has different views on love. I just hope that when you're talking about feelings, you don't mix reality and interests into it. Otherwise, the relationship won't be beautiful. How many moments in a person's life are truly immersed in sweet love? Being able to have that one moment or instant of spiritual connection is enough to comfort you, because in this realistic society, how many people are truly pursuing love in their relationships?"

I nodded, agreeing with Aunt Xin's statement.

"Yes, I understand what you mean, thank you! I'll remember that. However, although I don't know how to let a relationship develop naturally when there's mutual affection, I will let my feelings guide me to accept and give."

Aunt Xin smiled, her eyes revealing appreciation, relief, and maternal tenderness.

Jiaming arrived promptly at seven o'clock, while I was still in my room, frantically searching for suitable clothes, like a cat on a hot tin roof. Just then, Aunt Xin came into the room, looked at the clothes scattered on the bed, carefully picked out a top and trousers, and urged me to put them on quickly so he wouldn't have to wait too long. In my panic, I hastily threw on the clothes without thinking, blew Aunt Xin a kiss, and went downstairs with Jiaming, leaving together.

Dinner was at a very classic and romantic Mexican restaurant. We were led to our seats by the waiter. When ordering, Jiaming asked worriedly,

"You know all the dishes?"

I honestly replied, "I know the names of all the dishes, but the question is, how they taste, I have no idea."

He smiled, "I'll order for you. If you're not satisfied, we can exchange dishes, okay?"

I nodded with satisfaction. "It's all good, you decide! I believe you know the local specialties well."

He beckoned to the waiter and gave him detailed instructions. Then, he looked at me with concern and gentle eyes. I panicked at his gaze and almost knocked over the vase on the table.

"What are you nervous about?"

I didn't know I was nervous; I just didn't know what to do with my hands and feet. "No, I'm not nervous at all."
He grabbed my hands, reassuring me. "Last night... what... happened?"

I pulled my hands away and lowered my head, remaining silent. "Why... aren't you saying anything?"

I... what should I say? Should I say I was jealous?

"I... I... actually, nothing's wrong. I just wanted to drink, to get drunk, that's all!"

This topic ended with the salad the waiter brought. For the entire dinner, we ate in silence, except for his concerned inquiries about the taste; no one else spoke.

After dinner, he suggested a walk along the Danube to aid digestion. I agreed and followed him to the riverbank. The Danube in winter was bitterly cold; I shivered uncontrollably, my nose turning red.
I couldn't stop sneezing. He took off his scarf and wrapped it around my neck, slowly encircling it.
Then… he boldly embraced me, pulling me close to feel his warmth. I didn't resist, letting him hold me. I buried my face in his collar, but unexpectedly… he lowered his head and lightly kissed my forehead.
I looked up and met his burning gaze. Before I could react, our lips were pressed tightly together, and the world spun around me. I closed my eyes, feeling his passion. His kiss was earnest and passionate, his tongue exploring my very soul.

I instinctively responded, letting him freely rub my buttocks. He involuntarily pressed his lower body against me, rubbing my buttocks against him. I felt an unusual desire surging within me, and I hugged him tighter, unable to help but sigh and pant. He gently asked in my ear,

"Come home with me?"

I pushed him away. "Isn't it too fast... We've only been together for a short time..."

He kissed me again, not letting me speak, until I was completely limp in his arms...

"I've been waiting for you for more than half a year. Is that fast enough? I helped you catch up at the last minute. It was the only way I could manage. I can't always use work as an excuse to go see you. Fortunately, you and Aunt Xin don't object, so I feel a little more at ease. Because I wasn't sure what your impression of me was until your drunken words last night. I didn't realize that... you like me."

I wondered what I had said in my drunken state. I asked him, "What did I say? Do things said when you're drunk count?"

He hugged me tighter and said smugly:

"You didn't say anything, but after we got back to the room, you kept urging me to leave and told me to chat with the ladies in the living room. And your tone was so sour! I realized... you were jealous! I was so happy then, because it confirmed that you care about me."

I can't really remember this part, unless it was drunken ramblings. However, these unintentional drunken words removed the barrier between us and let down our guard. So, last night... my drunkenness made some sense.

When we arrived at Jiaming's apartment, my heart was pounding faster than a spaceship because I knew roughly what was going to happen. But Jiaming didn't rush to take me to the room. As soon as we got home, he went to the kitchen, saying he was going to make coffee to warm up. When he brought out two steaming cups of coffee, I was watching a TV series on the living room sofa.

He sat down beside me, put his arm around me, and we enjoyed a series of exciting programs during the New Year period. While we were watching, he asked with concern,

"Did you understand everything? Don't hesitate to ask if you don't. Watching TV is the fastest way to learn a language."

I snuggled closer to him. "Hmm! Although I don't understand everything—some grammar and past tense variations are difficult—I can still guess the meaning even if I don't understand one or two words in a sentence."

He exclaimed in admiration, "But you! You really learn very quickly. When I first came here, it would take me at least six months to be able to take the certification exam, but you got your admission qualification in just over four months."

I playfully flattered him, "Yes! It's all thanks to your teaching, so you deserve a lot of credit, teacher!"
Just then, he turned my face towards him and looked at me very seriously. I blushed and my heart raced under his gaze. He brought his face closer to me and kissed me. I naturally wrapped my arms around the back of his neck and accepted his third kiss of the day.

He pushed me down onto the sofa, kissing me passionately and fiercely, his hands slowly unbuttoning my shirt. When my upper body was exposed to him naked, his mouth couldn't resist kissing my breasts. He gently licked my nipples with his tongue, and I trembled all over, unable to resist such teasing. I moaned, sighed, and my breathing became rapid.

He reached down and unzipped my pants, then went straight through my underwear to touch my genitals. I instinctively recoiled, terrified. But I also hoped he wouldn't stop, because a completely unfamiliar excitement and a burgeoning desire were consuming me.

I was intoxicated by his caresses, my lower body feeling an unprecedented hunger. He kept playing with my clitoris while sucking on my breasts. I couldn't resist his teasing from above and below; my lower body was overflowing with desire. Suddenly, he stopped, picked me up, and carried me to the room.

As he laid me flat on the bed, he quickly stripped off his clothes. Naked, he climbed onto the bed, onto my body, and used his knee to spread my legs. He thrust his penis forward, and I felt a tearing pain in my lower body, causing me to cry out. He sat up quickly in a panic, asking with a look of pity,

"Is this... your first time?"

I nodded shyly, tears streaming down my face, because it hurt so much! Surprised, he asked again,

"Are you really willing? Are you really going to give yourself to me?"

I nodded again. He reached out and spread my legs even wider, carefully guiding his penis and slowly sliding it against my vaginal opening.

"It'll definitely hurt the first time. If it really hurts so much you can't stand it, shall we stop?"
I looked at his encouraging eyes, which reassured him as he tried to slide in again. I endured the pain, gripping his arms tightly, gritting my teeth, closing my eyes, and feeling his penis breaking through my muscles. He slowly pushed forward, little by little, until his penis was completely submerged in my vagina, and then he began to move.

I opened my wet eyes and saw that he had already breathed a sigh of relief and kissed me, letting his lower body sway slowly. The initial pain was lessened a lot because of his "movement," and because his hands were constantly kneading my breasts, I felt a mixture of pain and excitement.

At this moment, he suddenly increased the speed and supported himself with his hands, thrusting forward forcefully. I couldn't help but cry out. I really couldn't tell if the pain outweighed the pleasure, or vice versa. I only saw his excited expression and his increasing speed. I finally experienced the pleasure of sex and was very sure that the excitement had overwhelmed the pain.

I moaned and gasped, hooking my legs around his waist to allow for deeper thrusts. Waves of pleasure surged through my body, and I felt an unprecedented satisfaction and pleasure in my vagina. I felt like I was floating on clouds, so unreal, this joy driving me crazy. I looked at him shyly, and he gave me a silly, encouraging smile, while thrusting wildly. After a moment, he suddenly stopped, pulled out his penis, and ejaculated on my abdomen and chest. Then, panting, he lay down and hugged me tightly.
I whispered,

"You're a woman now, you're mine... I want you to be mine forever!"

The night deepened, and amidst the tension and excitement of my first taste of forbidden fruit, I unknowingly fell asleep. I only woke up when he called Aunt Xin, his voice drifting from the living room.

I got up to go to the bathroom to wash, but as soon as my feet touched the ground, a sharp pain shot through my lower body. I endured the pain and slowly walked into the bathroom to rinse. Blood trickled from my vagina; I knew it was the hymen from a girl becoming a woman, a process every woman must go through. A warm feeling washed over me as the scene from earlier flashed through my mind. After washing, I put on Jiaming's bathrobe and went back to the room. I saw him changing the blood-stained sheets. After helping him change into clean sheets, he said,

"Stay here tonight. I've already called Aunt Xin."

I smiled and nodded... "What... did she say?"

He shrugged awkwardly. "She said to be careful."

My face flushed, and my heart inexplicably started racing again!

"We... just now... I don't think... I'm pregnant, do I?"

He hugged me, a smile on his face. "No, don't worry! I won't let the child follow us like this."
My bathrobe suddenly loosened as he pulled it open. He couldn't help but kiss me again, his hands roaming freely over my body. I went limp, and he pushed me down onto the bed. He took off his pajama bottoms and pulled my hand to touch his erect penis through his underwear. I was startled! I timidly withdrew my hand. He took off his underwear and pulled my hand to stroke it again. This time... I was bolder. I grasped his penis and began to stroke it up and down. At the same time, I thought, is this the same thick, strong penis that drives me crazy and makes me feel intoxicated?
I want to kiss it, I want to taste it. I got up, took off my bathrobe, and took off his underwear. I lowered my head, opened my mouth, and took his throbbing penis into my mouth. Without any guidance or instruction, I didn't know how to make him feel good.

So I figured out how to eat a popsicle: sucking, licking, and licking. I held it, pressed my tongue against the glans, licked it, then sucked hard with my mouth, doing this up-and-down motion repeatedly. His hands were already restlessly squeezing my breasts and rubbing my vagina.

I was panting as I sucked, and his teasing made me eat the meat-based popsicle even harder. Clear liquid oozed from my urethra. Confused, I stopped and looked at him. He was sweating and excitedly pushed me down, pressing his entire body against me. He rubbed his penis against my abdomen.

"You...you stopped? I almost couldn't hold back just now."

He pushed my legs apart. "It's not the first time, so try to relax. I'm going to go in. Tell me if it hurts!"

I grabbed his arm, ready for him to enter again. He lifted his penis and slid it forward gently. There was still some pain. I gritted my teeth and raised my hips in cooperation. He thrust forward again, and it went in!

Once inside, he thrust in and out quickly and intensely. I began to feel excited and couldn't help but moan. He panted and asked, "Does it still hurt?"

I looked at him innocently and shook my head vigorously. He grinned mischievously, lifted my legs, placed them on his shoulders, and thrust inside me.

"Ahhhhhh!!"

It felt so good, such a deep thrust. Seeing how excited I was, he increased his speed, each powerful thrust bringing me to the brink of hysteria. I kept calling his name.

All I heard was him responding with "Mmm... Mmm..."

My vagina suddenly contracted, and I felt a surge of heat about to erupt. I cried out nervously,

"No... Ahhhhh! I... I need to pee!"

He grabbed my trembling legs, his expression excited, and said,

"You're about to climax, don't be afraid... Relax, let it out!"

Before he could finish speaking, a gush of hot fluid oozed from my vagina. But he didn't stop because of my climax; instead, he thrust even more violently. After about a dozen thrusts, he spread my legs off his shoulders and made me roll over and kneel. I obeyed his instructions, wondering what he was planning. Unexpectedly, he impatiently inserted his penis from behind. In my panic, I felt a different kind of pleasure from being penetrated from the front, and I cried out uncontrollably. He held my waist and thrust hard, pounding rapidly. I could even hear the sounds coming from his nose and throat. After about five minutes of his vigorous thrusting, I heard him say, "Ohhhhhh!"

He quickly pulled out his penis, letting his semen spray onto my back. His penis throbbed against my buttocks and waist. I collapsed, panting, and he followed behind me, holding me close. We were both exhausted from making love twice in a row, so after wiping ourselves off, I nestled in his arms, leaning against his broad chest, and he held me as we drifted off to sleep.

(Chapter 4)

After having physical intimacy with Jiaming, during the New Year holiday, we often hid at his house, not going anywhere else. We were like newlyweds all day long, cooking together, cleaning together, bathing together, and even making love without restraint. It also allowed me to deeply experience the pleasure and passion of sex. I often teased him, asking how long he had been starving. Why did he get so aroused every time our bodies touched? He would pretend to be serious and say,

"What starving! I would never be indiscriminate, much less just take advantage of anyone. If you won't give it to me, I'll just have to eat at the buffet."

I asked him, puzzled, "Buffet? What do you mean?"

He then said with a lecherous grin,

"I have to take care of my physical needs! Because I'm a normal man, I need to relieve myself appropriately. If I don't take care of myself, will I let my sperm accumulate and affect my brainpower? How can I work then? We men often experience a direct impact on our upper body functioning due to emptiness in our lower body."

After hearing this, I was surprised and realized how different men and women are.

The New Year holiday passed quickly amidst our sweet romance, and I began to focus on my studies. Jiaming, perhaps because of our relationship, surprisingly achieved remarkable results at work. Aunt Xin said,

"Is the power of love really that great? I need to find someone to date too!"

I often felt embarrassed by Aunt Xin, who would casually add, "You're on a pre-honeymoon! Will your honeymoon still count as a honeymoon after you get married?"

I've seriously considered this question, and my conclusion is that as long as I'm with Jiaming, I think I'll never get tired of him, nor will I ever be bored with sex. Jiaming makes me so immersed in passionate sex. Whenever I think of the scenes of our intimacy, my heart races involuntarily, or I smile foolishly, oblivious to everyone else. I think I'm a little abnormal because, apart from classes and sleep, I think about him all the time. I often space out, even ignoring what I see, hear, and eat. If this continues, I worry that my studies will be in danger.

In mid-March, Jiaming received a call from Taiwan informing him that his father had been hospitalized with a severe cold, and the cause of the complications was still under investigation. His father's life was in danger, so he needed to return to Taiwan. When he told me this, I couldn't help but burst into tears.

"Go and come back soon, I'll wait for you. Don't be too sad... maybe your father will recover."

His eyes were also red. "I hope so. Please take care of yourself. I'll come back as soon as I've finished my business."
With a hasty decision, he rushed to the airport, giving me a tearful hug. I watched him until his figure completely disappeared before leaving sadly.

After Jiaming arrived in Taiwan, he called to tell me that things were serious and he might have to stay for a few more weeks because if his father passed away, he would have to handle the funeral. I remained silent, unsure how to respond. With his repeated reassurances, I calmed myself and accepted this sudden reality, trying to soothe his grief and longing. After we reluctantly hung up, I would hide in my room and vent my emotions or cry. Whenever I spoke with Jiaming on the phone, Aunt Xin would always try her best to distract me or cheer me up. Besides phone calls

, Jiaming and I also kept in touch online. Whenever we had free time, we would write to each other, pouring out our longing. The second week after Jiaming returned to Taiwan, he wrote to me, asking me to tell Aunt Xin that he was handling his father's funeral and also had a lawsuit with the hospital.

I was already prepared for his father's possible death at any time, but the question was, why this lawsuit? So, he wouldn't be able to return anytime soon? Overwhelmed with sadness, I relayed the news to Aunt Xin, who sighed and shook her head.
"Without him, the firm is too busy. There's nothing we can do now! We'll have to hire another accountant, otherwise, by the time he returns, the accounts will be piling up."

I was speechless. Because it happened so suddenly, Aunt Xin and I had no way of knowing Jiaming's exact return date. Days passed quietly amidst our busyness and longing, through correspondence. Jiaming had been gone for two whole months. In the beginning, we exchanged letters daily, both using the internet to express our feelings of reluctance. Now, sometimes it takes two or three days to receive his letter. His letters often ask me to understand him, that he's overwhelmed with the lawsuit, and that his mother is devastated by his father's sudden death and needs his care and comfort. What can I say?

I can't tell him in every letter to come back soon! How much I miss him, how helpless I feel! I reluctantly tell him to prioritize his mother and not worry too much about me; I'm busy with my studies, what else can I do?
I gradually recovered from the disappointment of our separation and shifted my focus to my studies. Only in this way could I avoid being unable to cheer up because of missing Jiaming so much. Aunt Xin had been incredibly busy since Jiaming returned to Taiwan; she hadn't even been able to come home for dinner. The house felt empty, making me feel genuinely lonely and isolated. I couldn't help but call Aunt Xin's office, but no one answered after a long time. I tried calling her cell phone, but no one answered either. I thought maybe she was already on her way, driving, and that's why she couldn't answer.

Just then, the phone rang at home. In the quiet atmosphere, the ringing sounded like music, especially pleasant! I immediately answered, "Hello, Fang Mansion."

"Hello! This is the Municipal Hospital. Is Ms. Fang Jiaxin staying here?"

"Yes, she is."

"Does Ms. Fang have any relatives with her? Please have them answer the phone."

I thought for a moment. "What happened? She has no relatives here. I'm her niece."

The other party was silent for a moment. "Please come to the hospital immediately. Ms. Fang was in a car accident. Several surgeries require a family member's signature."

It was like a bolt from the blue! Another car accident! I rushed to the hospital while crying. After arriving, the medical staff helped me with the procedures and signed the papers. I didn't even have time to see Aunt Xin before she was wheeled into the operating room.

I found the doctor in the emergency room and asked what happened. The doctor said that when Aunt Xin arrived at the hospital, her head and face were covered in blood, and she had multiple fractures. It was initially estimated that there was internal bleeding. I didn't have time to react. I just felt a constant ringing in my head. I thought of Jiaming. If only he were here at this moment, I wouldn't feel so helpless and scared.

The police found me and wanted to take a brief statement. I answered truthfully and asked about the location of the accident and the other party's injuries. The police said,

"It happened on xxx section of the road leading to the suburbs. There was no collision with other vehicles. The police believe it may be premeditated murder because the vehicle's braking system was completely damaged due to human error."

I was so shocked that I almost couldn't stand up. My legs went weak, and I collapsed onto a bench. Premeditated murder?! I couldn't believe that kind Aunt Xin had suffered such a tragedy!

I rested for a bit, picked up my phone, and without thinking twice, dialed Jiaming's address in Taipei. I checked my watch; it was early morning in Taiwan. He should be home by now! The phone rang about ten times, and I heard Jiaming's familiar voice.

"Jiaming... Jiaming!"

I couldn't help but burst into tears. I heard him urgently asking on the other end, "What happened? Don't cry, don't panic, let's talk it out."

I controlled my emotions and choked out the events of the evening. After listening, he was silent for a few seconds.

"Huan, don't worry. Wait until Aunt Xin's surgery and see how things go, then call me. I'll get ready to go to court. Maybe the case will have a result in the next couple of days. I'll tell my sister and brother-in-law. I'll arrange my return flight first. Don't cry, I'll get back as soon as possible. I wanted to surprise you. It seems that important matters are more important."

After hanging up, my mood improved slightly. Knowing that Jiaming would be back in the next couple of days, I felt reassured and patiently waited for the surgery results.

I don't know when I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was already dawn, but the operating room light was still on. I rubbed my eyes, went to the bathroom to wash up, washing away my fatigue and fear. When I came out, there was still no movement from the operating room. I sat there waiting and praying that Aunt Xin would be alright. More than two hours passed.

Finally, I saw Aunt Xin being wheeled out. I quickly stopped the doctor and asked about the surgery results. The doctor pulled down his
mask and said,

"We did our best, but the internal bleeding was too severe. Given the brain's blood loss and oxygen deprivation, this outcome was unexpected."

I asked, puzzled, "What do you mean? Is she still alive?"

The doctor nodded. "That's exactly what I meant. Saving her life was truly unexpected."
I happily asked again, "How long will she need to recover before being discharged?"

The doctor said helplessly, "How long… it's hard to say. She still needs to stay in the intensive care unit for observation for a while. Once the internal bleeding improves, she can be transferred to a regular ward. However, we can only make a proper assessment after she wakes up."

Alive, as long as she's alive! As long as she's alive, nothing is scary. I sincerely thanked the doctors for their efforts. After a whole night of turmoil, I returned home exhausted and immediately contacted my mother, explaining the whole situation in detail. She was eager to come, but I told her not to rush, that taking care of the family was more important, and that I should contact her again if there was any new information.

After hanging up, I called Jiaming and reported the surgery results again. Jiaming said he would arrive early the day after tomorrow, and we could meet at the airport. I was so relieved I almost cheered!

After hanging up, because of the extreme "joy and sorrow" that had occurred within twenty-four hours, I couldn't sleep. I called some familiar classmates to explain that I couldn't attend classes for the next couple of days and asked if they could pick up materials or lend me notes. After taking a shower, I went to bed to rest, and also took the opportunity to think about the premeditated murder the police had mentioned. The people from New Year's Eve flashed through my mind.

It was unlikely that there was any dispute serious enough to warrant a deliberate premeditated murder. I kept recalling, thinking about Aunt Xin's social circle and network. Besides her colleagues, what about her boyfriend? As far as I know, Aunt Xin doesn't have a boyfriend, but... she did say that she has a regular sexual partner to satisfy her physical needs. However, I've never met him. I've only heard Aunt Xin say:

"We each get what we need. He satisfies me, and I provide rent and pocket money. There are no feelings involved! He also has a bunch of girlfriends."

It couldn't be him. Aunt Xin wouldn't be stingy; she's always been generous. Ah! No way, it was that scoundrel from that night, that beast? The more I thought about it, the more likely it seemed. As soon as Jiaming arrived, I had to tell him everything that happened that night and let him decide how to handle it. Yes! That's it! I can't let Aunt Xin suffer psychological and physical trauma for no reason.

At the airport, I waited for Jiaming to arrive. His plane had already arrived, but I couldn't see him. I anxiously looked around, wondering if I hadn't noticed and he had already come out.

I stood on tiptoe, craning my neck, desperately searching... "Ah!"

I turned around and saw Jiaming. He hugged me from behind, startling me! We smiled and kissed each other's cheeks at the same time, and then, unable to restrain ourselves, we embraced tightly, passionately, and warmly. A moment later, we pushed our luggage together, got into the car, and headed straight to the hospital.

On the way, I recounted the entire story of what happened to Aunt Xin that night. Jiaming listened intently, his brow furrowed, his face full of worry.

"Was this... filed with the police station at the time?"

I thought for a moment. "It should have! Because Aunt Xin was brought back by the police."

Jiaming pondered for a moment. "Hmm... Tomorrow, I'll review all the client's data again at the office, because I'm still not sure which one it was."

I suddenly remembered the shady accounts. "Aunt Xin said she wanted to sue him! Because he had shady accounts in her possession, but later... for our safety, she had to give up."

Jiaming looked surprised and said, "It was him? He transferred his accounts to other accounting firms starting in early December last year. Many accountants found it strange that he didn't wait until the end of the year to hire another accountant, because for business people, the end of the year..." "If the accounting and profit and loss are not handled properly, the tax bureau will suspect something and it will be easy to investigate."

I asked curiously, "What kind of businessman is he?"

Jiaming said, "A very ordinary import and export trading company."

I asked again, "Have you seen him?"

Jiaming nodded, "Yes! He has come to the office several times. He looks ordinary, but his eyes are intimidating."

After the car arrived at the hospital, we went to the intensive care unit to visit Aunt Xin and asked the nurse about her current condition. The nurse said that it was the same as yesterday; she still hadn't woken up and needed to be observed further. Jiaming went directly to the attending physician to understand the condition. I stayed in the ward with Aunt Xin, holding her hand and unable to help but shed tears. I wondered if she could feel anything? Why hadn't she woken up yet! If she woke up, she might be able to get through the critical period and also help the police catch the culprit. Because, I don't know if the person I suspect is verifiable. Without a solid reason, would the police accept the person we suspect?

After visiting Aunt Xin, Jiaming offered to stay at her house until she was discharged from the hospital. Firstly, to keep me company, as he was worried about my safety living alone. Secondly, he said,

"I can't be running back and forth between the two places all the time, and I also have work and personal matters to handle. So, staying here is the best decision so I can easily see you after work."

Of course, I agreed! Even if he hadn't mentioned it, I was prepared to ask him to do it anyway, because I was genuinely scared. So that night, Jiaming packed his necessities and moved into Aunt Xin's house. I thought he would be unable to resist dragging me into the room, but instead, he said he had an appointment with the new accountant at the office to discuss recent taxes, as he had been away for eleven weeks and was returning to work the next day, not wanting to fall behind.

I was a little disappointed, but he was doing this for the greater good. As for physical intimacy, there's always time; he's already staying here, so what's the problem?

Before seeing him off, he whispered in my ear,

"I'll be back early. You should rest if you're tired! I'll find time to have a 'good' chat with you."
Then he kissed me briefly and left. His kiss was still so captivating, drawing my soul away!

I woke up in the middle of the night, checked the clock—it was past 2 AM and Jiaming still hadn't returned. I got up and went downstairs, intending to grab a glass of water. As soon as I reached the bottom, I heard Jiaming's voice. He was on the phone, speaking a string of broken German, which I couldn't understand at all.

"Jiaming! Aren't you resting? Who are you talking to?"

He turned around, slightly startled to see me. "Why are you up? I'll be right up!"

He quickly said a few words and hung up. After drinking some water in the kitchen, I wanted to ask him if he was hungry, as I'd been busy non-stop since landing. But… he was already in his room.

I followed him upstairs and heard the sound of running water coming from my room. He was taking a shower! I lay down, waiting for him, my excitement rising. I deliberately dimmed the bedside lamp and took off my pajamas, leaving only my underwear. After he came out of the bathroom, he quickly got into bed. Seeing I wasn't asleep, he embraced me and kissed me for a moment. Then he unhooked my underwear, kneading my breasts while pulling down his only pair of underwear. His penis was already throbbing. I reached out and grabbed it, stroking it up and down, but he couldn't resist pulling my hand away, pressing his body against mine, and thrusting in quickly.

We both breathed heavily in pleasure. Once inside, he began to thrust and pound rapidly, as if releasing all the longing and repression of the past two months. I watched him excitedly, seeing him working so hard. I grabbed his arm, and he, like a wild beast, charged forward, recklessly.

I moaned in pleasure, feeling a large amount of fluid flowing from my vagina. He seemed determined to drive me to madness with every thrust! I soon ejaculated, my body trembling as I held him tightly. He, too, couldn't withstand the surge of my orgasm and ejaculated inside me before he could pull out. He collapsed, exhausted, his penis still inside me. We embraced, and I gasped,
"Today...isn't...a safe period."

He didn't answer. After a while, I gently pushed him away, only to find he was already snoring. I rushed to the bathroom, grabbed the showerhead, and tried to wash away the semen.

The next day, I woke up and didn't see Jiaming. I went downstairs, but couldn't find him either. I immediately called the office. The operator said Jiaming hadn't arrived yet, but they had contacted the office and said he'd be there later. Without hesitation, I called his cell phone, and Jiaming answered.

"Huan, I'm at the hospital, it's not convenient for us to talk. You go to class first! See you after work."

It turned out he rushed to see Aunt Xin early this morning. I breathed a sigh of relief, and I was also puzzled as to why I had been in such a hurry to see him. Perhaps it was because after a passionate night, not seeing him this morning left me feeling a sense of loss. I teased myself for being impatient. He's taken care of so many things for me; he can't possibly be like before, just lying in bed with me, putting everything else aside, solely enjoying our intimacy. I

only had one class in the afternoon, and after it ended, I went to the hospital to visit her. When I arrived at the ICU, the nurse told me that Aunt Xin was being taken for a scan and wouldn't be back for at least an hour. I considered it for a moment and decided not to wait. Maybe I'd come later or tomorrow, so I went to the office. When I arrived, the secretary said that Jiaming was discussing something with a client and it wasn't convenient to disturb him.

She asked me to wait in the meeting room with a cup of coffee. I was getting quite bored waiting there; a full hour had passed. As I got up to leave, I bumped into Aunt Xin's lawyer at the door. I was a little surprised, but I made sure to exchange a few pleasantries with him. The lawyer complimented my fluent speech and, with a half-smile, asked,
"When are you getting married? Don't forget to send me the invitation!"

When he asked me that question, I blushed and couldn't speak, only managing a silly grin. After saying goodbye to the lawyer, I saw Jiaming standing at his office door, watching my conversation with the lawyer.

"Huan, come in! How long have you been waiting?"

I entered his office and closed the door behind me. "Were you talking to your lawyer just now?"

He nodded and lit a cigarette. "Hmm? What's up? I was asking the lawyer about Aunt Xin being forced to jump out of the car last time, and also about how much strong evidence the police would need to prosecute if they accepted our suspicions."
I asked again, "Why did you tell the lawyer we're getting married?"

He smiled and said, "Don't you want to marry me?"

I looked helpless. "Even if I did, not now! Aunt Xin is still unconscious, who knows when she'll wake up! I don't have the mind to marry you, and besides... at least wait until I finish university!"

He tidied up his documents and pulled me up. "Come on, I'll take you home first, I have to go to the police station later."

We arrived at the parking lot together. "Can't I come with you to the police station?"

He smiled. "Of course you can! But I'm afraid you'll get tired. And, aren't you going home to prepare dinner for me?"

I complied with his suggestion and let him take me home first. Before getting out of the car, I hugged him and kissed him.
"When will you be home?"

He glanced at his watch. "Around eight o'clock, okay? Just make some light dishes, nothing too complicated, I'll be right back!"

After saying goodbye, I inexplicably felt neglected by Jiaming. Perhaps it was because we'd been apart for so long, and his previous enthusiasm had vanished? Maybe I was just overthinking it! I hope so. I should try to understand his busy schedule; since I can't help him, all I can do is be understanding.

(Chapter 5)

Aunt Xin has been hospitalized for a week since the accident, but there's been no improvement. I anxiously asked the doctor when she would wake up and when she could be transferred to a regular ward.

The doctor always said helplessly that it depended on the patient's willpower. Besides, even though the internal bleeding had improved, recovery would take time. The doctor was pessimistic about whether she would wake up or not, because the severe brain injury caused severe oxygen deprivation. Even if she woke up, it was difficult to determine whether her brain would function normally.

After hearing these professional explanations from the doctor, I burst into tears. I couldn't even bear the grief of my father's passing! What if Aunt Xin really doesn't wake up? I dare not think about it; I truly don't want to accept the worst.

Since Jiaming returned from Taiwan, although we share a room every night, he usually doesn't go to bed until the wee hours. In other words, apart from the night Jiaming landed, we haven't had sex again due to the timing and my depressed mood.

But tonight, after I prepared dinner, while we were eating in the dining room, the look he gave me was excited and hungry. I blushed and my heart raced.

"Just eat, don't look at me like that, I won't be able to eat,"

he said, abruptly putting down his chopsticks and carrying me to the living room. I resisted, flailing my limbs, but he resolutely threw me onto the sofa, then quickly pulled down his pants. His erect penis throbbed in front of me. He pressed it against my face, pushing the back of my head to suck on it. I resisted! Turning my head, I was shocked to see him push me down, strip off my skirt, pull down my panties, lift one of my legs, and, holding his penis, thrust inside me. Because my vagina was still dry, I pushed him away in pain and screamed.

He was like a wild beast, ravenously driven and unable to stop, accelerating his advance. My vagina gradually became wet, but I couldn't help but shed tears, letting him frantically rub, thrust, and pump on my body.
I held back my noise, closed my eyes, and let him be satisfied. I sadly pondered, where was my former gentleness? Where was my former tenderness? He panted, letting out a series of hoarse sounds from his throat. Suddenly, he gripped my thighs, cried out "Oh~ Oh~," and ejaculated.

He lay on top of me, satisfied, his penis trembling inside my vagina. I quickly pushed him away and rushed to the bathroom.

After washing up, I came out of the room and saw him looking apologetic. I ignored him and gave him an angry look. He cautiously embraced me.

"I'm sorry, I was only thinking about my own satisfaction and didn't consider your feelings."

"Jiaming, I think you've lost your mind! Why did you make me feel like you were raping me just now!
You know that makes me reluctant to have sex with you!"

He hugged me tighter, saying tenderly,

"I'm really sorry! I've been so busy lately, I really haven't had time to lie down and sleep with you properly. Just now, seeing your thighs constantly exposed, I just couldn't hold back anymore, and I lost control, I just wanted to have sex with you quickly, otherwise, I was afraid I'd ejaculate in my pants."

I gently pushed him away. "If you want it, do you think I won't give it to you? But I hope you won't do this again, because it will make me very sad."

He pulled me to sit on the bed… "Then… are you not angry anymore?"

I asked helplessly.

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The truth in the shadows

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