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Once he slept in my bed, he only allowed me to play with him. 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-06-11 11:28:53  
Four years ago, in the spring, my wife was back in our hometown taking care of her sister-in-law who was in postpartum confinement, leaving me alone in the empty house. I felt incredibly lonely then.

She was a recent graduate interning at my company, tall, with a stunning figure, and her skin, though not very fair, was extremely smooth. Back then, she always wore a light-colored trench coat, and a brightly colored silk scarf made her beautiful face even more alluring. Her voice was soft and clear, incredibly pleasant to hear. At that time, the company was encouraging everyone to do sales in order to expand its business. She was originally a designer, but encouraged by the boss, she wanted to try her hand at it. However, being a novice, she was too inexperienced in sales, so the boss told her to find a suitable experienced salesperson to mentor her. Because in the days following her arrival, I happened to have a project where the design department needed to create renderings for a client. Although I mainly focused on sales, I still liked to do some design work myself. So I saw her every day in the design department, but we'd just exchange greetings and a few words. Unexpectedly, she chose me as her mentor.
(Let's call her Xiaolu for now, because in my heart she's become a soaring, pure white egret.) Xiaolu accompanied me to meet clients. Considering her stamina and energy, I didn't dare take her too far on the first day. Xiaolu initially seemed very cold and aloof, but once you got to know her, you'd find she was actually very warm and gentle, and very competitive with a strong will to succeed. When she learned that I had reduced my client visits because of her, she apologized and said it was okay, she could manage. So I resumed my client meeting schedule for the next day and made plans in advance. With

a beautiful woman by my side, even the longest journey didn't feel tiring. The next day, with Xiaolu's company, I signed contracts with the agreed-upon clients. In high spirits, I went to meet a potential client in the afternoon. These two days of alone time allowed Xiaolu and me to get to know each other better. But I mostly talked, and she was extremely interested in my experiences as a migrant worker in the south over the past few years. When I mentioned seeing egrets flying in the countryside of Hunan, I showered them with praise while wistfully reminiscing about the breathtaking landscape I had witnessed that day. At that moment, her gaze towards me held a distinctly complex expression, which I noticed but didn't dwell on. Later, I learned that her maternal grandmother's home was in Hunan, and egrets were her favorite birds.

Because I had caught quite a few birds that morning, and felt lonely after returning home that evening, I suggested treating her to dinner (I didn't have any particular intentions at the time; I just wanted to have a meal with her and then we could go our separate ways). She happily agreed, saying, "Okay, okay!" So, the conversation naturally turned to food on the way home. I mentioned that I often cook at home, and I like to cook fish whenever I have free time; my fish cooking is quite delicious. After hearing this, she casually remarked, "It would be great if I had the chance to try it!" I checked the time and said, "Why don't you come to my place tonight? I'll cook fish for you." To my surprise, she readily agreed.

Because of the beautiful woman in front of me, my cooking skills were exceptionally good that day, and she praised all the dishes I made. Dinner was very enjoyable, and the time passed quickly; neither of us noticed when it got dark. We chatted so enthusiastically on the sofa that when we realized it was time to take her back to school, it was already past 10 pm. She anxiously said that she wouldn't be able to get into the campus after 10:30 pm. It's at least a 40-minute walk from my house to her school, so I politely offered her a place to stay, which she agreed to after a moment's thought.
No longer worried about not being able to get back to school, we continued chatting. I don't know how she felt at that moment, but afterwards, it was obvious that my feelings were somewhat affected. The conversation wasn't as lively as before; I felt a strange unease, an inexplicable impulse and the resulting excitement increasingly overwhelming me. The conversation dwindled, eventually fading into silence. When she noticed me looking at her, she lowered her head. A long silence followed, the room eerily quiet except for our heavy breathing. After what seemed like an eternity, I mustered my courage, my hands trembling, and gently reached out my right hand to embrace her, whispering in a similarly trembling voice, "I like you... I like you so much!" She went limp in my arms.

I held her close, gently kissing her face and lips. She shyly closed her eyes, her face burning hot. When I pried open her teeth with my tongue, she hesitated, refusing to let my tongue penetrate further. I didn't dare force it, closing my eyes to inhale her youthful scent, continuing to kiss her while my hand moved to her breasts. I gently massaged her full breasts a few times, and she seemed to lose all her strength, clinging softly to me, no longer resisting my tongue, letting me explore her mouth freely. With less resistance, my head buzzed, blood rushed to my head, and adrenaline surged at an astonishing rate. I held her tightly with my other hand, which slipped inside her clothes, but when I tried to push off her bra, she pushed me away. After

an awkward moment, we both calmed down. I left my bed for her, intending to sleep on the small bed in the guest room. After washing up, she lay on the bed without undressing, the door open. I, still burning with desire, sat in the living room, absentmindedly watching the various programs on TV. She remained lying there, one leg dangling off the bed. After a while, she called me in, saying she couldn't sleep and asked if I could stay and talk to her a little longer. I lay down gently beside her, unsure what to say. Gazing at her beautiful face and curvaceous figure, I couldn't resist reaching out again… When I tried to undo her belt, she resisted, but couldn't withstand the powerful onslaught of my other hand and tongue. After several attempts to push her away, she stopped moving. Then, I encountered the most embarrassing thing of my life—I couldn't undo the belt.

For nearly 20 minutes, I struggled to keep her passion alive while frantically trying to undo that damned belt. Finally, I don't know where I touched it, but the belt loosened a bit and then came out completely. (I later bought one of those belts that I cursed countless times; a simple little mechanism almost drove me crazy.)

It wasn't her first time, which lessened my guilt somewhat. But judging from her awkwardness, she truly hadn't experienced anything like it before. She told me that she had once let her boyfriend into the classroom, but because of the pain, the blood, and the fear of being seen by someone, she didn't dare to continue. Her breakup with him was partly due to this unsuccessful experience. Less than six months have passed since the breakup, and she still hasn't recovered from the pain.

That day was the seventh day after I met her, and then she secretly moved into my house. For 47 days, after experiencing the wonders of sex, she made love to me every night, sometimes even more passionately than me. Seeing her deeply intoxicated expression, I became even more infatuated with her!
She's a very good girl, kind and understanding. She once asked me, "What if my wife finds out about us?" I said, "I'll die!" She said, "I'm not a good girl, but I'm not a bad girl either. I know it's wrong, but I just love you! I won't destroy your family, I won't be that kind of person..."

Knowing our relationship wouldn't last, on the 48th day, she resolutely took a train south to Xiamen to stay with a classmate. The endless longing she left me after she left tormented me every day. This agonizing period didn't last long before she, equally unable to let go, called from Xiamen. And so, we spent every day on the phone, sharing our lovesickness.

One day, the phone went dead. I tried calling her, but it was switched off. Suddenly, my heart felt empty again. After two days of anxious anticipation, I unexpectedly heard her voice while answering a local call.

She was back! The passion of our reunion kept us in bed for the next few days, locked in a passionate embrace! And so, we were bewitched, immersed in the pleasure of our affair and the subsequent remorse…

My wife came back, and our affairs became more secretive, with fewer and fewer meetings. We talked about breaking up several times, but each time we couldn't resist the longing for each other and got back together. I felt guilty, feeling terrible for my wife and even more so for her. I knew this was pointless, that continuing would only waste her time and ruin myself. But I truly couldn't let her go. I knew leaving was the best outcome for her, yet several times I still took the bus to her place…

Meeting once or twice a month gradually faded the initial passion, and after meeting, we could only hold each other and whisper sweet nothings. All of this greatly strengthened our resolve to separate, even though we both found it so hard to let go. One night, when my wife wasn't home, I took a bus to see her. After dinner, it was raining heavily. I had agreed to take the night bus home, but when I dropped her off at her apartment building, she invited me to come up and sit for a while longer!
In the room, I tightly embraced that long-lost body, kissing passionately the face that rubbed against me every day. But when I lay on the bed and tried to take off her t-shirt, she resolutely refused. On one hand, I wanted to respect her decision, but on the other hand, I couldn't suppress the fire in my heart, so I persisted with her half-hearted resistance. I don't know when, but she suddenly sat up, turned on the light, and pounded the bed with her hands, painfully calling my name and saying, "XX, please don't torture me like this anymore! I finally managed to pull myself out of that infatuation, please don't force me anymore, okay? I can't take it, I really can't take it!" Seeing her almost frantic pain, my heart ached terribly. I gently held her, my hands no longer moving, and quietly fell asleep.
Dawn broke! I opened my eyes and quietly looked at her. After a long time, she woke up too. Knowing I was leaving, she softly said, "It's still early! It'll be cold going out now." I stared at her quietly for a while, then sighed and said, "I still have to go." I leaned over and kissed her deeply on her luscious lips, saying my last words to her: "Let's not say goodbye!" After saying that, I turned away, not daring to look at her again. I didn't know what she was thinking behind me—would she be heartbroken or relieved? I dared not think about it, nor did I dare to look.
Downstairs, the rain from last night had left many puddles. I waded through them, lost and disoriented, not daring to look back, not daring to look at the window behind me, not daring to see if there was a figure standing there. I dared not look, I couldn't look, I couldn't, I couldn't continue to hurt her like this!
Later, she still left this city, left this heartbreaking city with a man who had brought her brief happiness and even more pain. She went south again and never called me again. A year later, we contacted each other a few times on QQ, just exchanging greetings, and then I completely lost contact with her, not even on QQ.
It's been four years since we separated, and I still often think of her. Whenever I do, I feel a warmth and joy in my heart, but I can only keep those thoughts to myself.
Every year on her birthday, I still write her a birthday message in my QQ mailbox. Whether she thinks of me with longing or resentment in the future, I will silently bless her from afar!

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