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page views:1 Publication date:2022-04-22

1. After procrastinating for two years, I finally decided to learn to drive. I chose a small driving school near my home. I checked online forums and everyone said the school was pretty good, except for a few people who said, "Don't go with that instructor surnamed Li." I thought, since so many people said this instructor was bad, I could just avoid him, so I happily signed up anyway. But today I discovered that all the instructors at that driving school have the surname Li.
2. Damn, I've been around for years, and today I actually ran into a thief! He unzipped my wife's bag and I saw him. Finally, it's my time to shine! I yelled, "Wife, run!"
3. Who's more embarrassed than me? When I was in junior high, our class monitor was a girl. I made a bet with a friend that he would kiss our class monitor, and he did! Now the class monitor is nine months pregnant, and the baby is mine.
4. I was on the bus home today, almost at my stop! I walked to the door! There was a pretty woman standing in front of me! Then the driver suddenly braked, and the woman was about to fall! With lightning speed, I grabbed her and caught her! Just as I was feeling incredibly excited, the woman turned around and said thank you! I felt like dying! She's even uglier than Sister Feng!
5. One day, Cao Cao captured Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei. Cao Cao said, "You three go to the orchard and each choose a fruit." So the three went in. After a while, Liu Bei came out with an apple. Cao Cao said to him, "Stuff the fruit you picked into your anus, and I'll release you." Liu Bei tried but failed and was killed. Guan Yu came out with three grapes, and Cao Cao said the same thing to him. When Guan Yu stuffed the third grape in, he suddenly laughed, popping the last one, and was killed as well. Guan Yu went to hell, and Yama asked him, "How could you be so stupid? If you hadn't laughed, nothing would have happened!" Guan Yu said, "I didn't want to laugh, but when I stuffed the third grape in, I saw Zhang Fei walking out carrying a durian..." Haha ...

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