Goddess, you're overthinking it.

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Goddess, you're overthinking it.

I took my goddess out for a drive, and we ended up in a deserted place. Goddess: I...I need to pee. Me: There's no toilet here.

Goddess: Figure it out, quick!

Me: How about this, I'll stop the car, and you pee in the back. I won't get out; there's no one else here.

*Slap* My face.

Goddess: You pervert! Don't think I don't read jokes; you're trying to peek with the rearview camera, aren't you?

Me: I have a beat-up electric tricycle; it doesn't even have a reverse gear, so where would I get a rearview camera?

I can never sing The Smurfs properly again.

Yesterday I took my girlfriend to karaoke. You know how it is. After we got in, the landlady led us to our room. In the long corridor, she sang a song I'll never forget: "Beside the bed, in the cabinet, there's a group of Smurfs; they're super thin and elastic, they're long-lasting and powerful!" That wasn't the climax. The climax was when my girlfriend sang it again right when we were at our peak, and I immediately lost control.

Wife, you're so sharp-tongued!

Before we left, my wife was putting on makeup. I said, "You're in a hurry, stop."

She said, "Wait a minute, just two minutes."

Fifteen minutes later, she was still drawing her eyebrows. I went over and said impatiently, "Aren't you done yet? Every time you say two minutes, it always ends up being ten."

"You're so nice!" she said, looking at me in the mirror. "Every time you say ten minutes, it always ends up being less than two.

I never thought there were anyone more despicable than me..."

If the person you like is drunk and falls into your bed, what would you choose to do: a) stay by her side; b) cover her with a blanket; c) gently kiss her; d) take her... I chose d. I thought my answer would be the most disgusting, but I didn't expect someone to reply: cddddba...

Do we have two mute people living next door?

I remember once going to another city for an exam and sharing a hotel with a cute girl classmate. That night, I went to her room. At that moment, a series of seductive "ah ah" sounds came from the next room. I was speechless and couldn't help but peek at her reaction. She was initially confused, but after listening intently for a long time, she blurted out, "Do we have two mute people living next door? Why are they making those 'uh-huh' and 'ah-ah' sounds?"

And those girls, what are you blushing for ? My

girlfriend called to say she was coming to see me and asked me to pick her up. Being a loser without a car, I had to take the bus. On the way, I got a call saying my package had arrived and I needed to pick it up within five minutes. I had no choice but to call my colleague: "Dude, hurry up and get my package from the door, hehe, my girlfriend's here, can you help me out?"

Then, I felt the wicked gazes around me, and those girls, what are you blushing for?

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Goddess, you're overthinking it.

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