Girl's feelings

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

In the pavilion, a gentle breeze carried the fragrance of the garden's flowers, and colorful butterflies fluttered among the vibrant blossoms.

A stunningly beautiful young woman sat at the zither table, playing the instrument.

Six years had passed in the blink of an eye,

and Hua Luo had now grown into a graceful sixteen-year-old girl. Just as Nangong Kai had predicted, and even far exceeding his expectations, she was incredibly beautiful, surpassing even the most celestial beings in beauty, with skin as fine as snow and a fragrance more alluring than orchids!

Her beauty was captivating, whether in the dark or the bright day; anyone who saw her could only marvel at her beauty, completely forgetting to breathe.

This beautiful young woman, with every gesture and movement exuding a graceful and charming elegance, possessed a refined and refined grace, a result of her rigorous upbringing and strict instruction in all necessary knowledge and etiquette.

Of course, her innate purity and innate grace also contributed to her perfect appearance. Her beauty and talent were so exquisite

that one would forget the time of day!

The clear, resonant notes of music flowed from her fingers, drifting melodiously through the fragrant garden, mingling with the chirping of birds, and touching the hearts of the listeners.

The whole world seemed enveloped in a peaceful and serene atmosphere, devoid of any human noise or commotion.

As usual, the maid Qingmiao stood quietly to the side, silently enjoying the music and silently watching over her mistress.

Suddenly, hurried footsteps came from the distance of the garden, and Qingmiao looked on alertly.

It turned out to be two maids bringing snacks. Seeing their happy faces, Qingmiao couldn't help but wonder what had made them so excited.

"Congratulations, Miss! Congratulations, Miss... We are so happy for you!" The two maids winked at Hualuo in unison, expressing their joy.

"What is it?" Hualuo paused her playing, her beautiful eyes turning to the two maids with a puzzled look, feeling a little dizzy from their congratulations.

What was there to congratulate her about? Why couldn't she recall anything?

"Oh dear! Miss, didn't you know? Today the hall is piled high with chests and chests of gold, silver, jewels, and silks. I heard they're all betrothal gifts from the Prince of Nan!" "

Bridegroom gifts?" Hua Luo began to have a bad feeling, and her delicate eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Yes! Miss. Didn't you know?" The two maids were still immersed in their joy, completely unaware of Hua Luo's strange reaction, and continued to tell her the good news one after another.

"Those are the betrothal gifts from the Prince of Nan to marry you! I heard that the prince will choose an auspicious day to marry you soon."

No! Hua Luo's body swayed, and she began to feel cold all over...

Her mind went blank, and she trembled as she raised her slender white hand to cover her chest, her face turning pale as she listened to the maids excitedly discussing her marriage.

No… Father… why…

Her nightmare seemed to have begun again…

She didn’t know who the Prince of Nan was, but she suddenly felt that the home that had always given her peace of mind no longer felt safe.

In fact, her first encounter with that “rough man” when she was ten years old had been locked deep in her memory, fragmented and blurred, because it was her most unpleasant experience.

In her memory, there seemed to be a big man holding her tightly, but she couldn’t remember what he looked like, or even who he was. She only knew that she didn’t want to see him! She didn’t want to remember him!

Six years had passed, and now she had deliberately and forcibly forgotten him.

So, when she first heard about the Prince of Nan, she didn’t have any special impression.

In fact, in her pure heart, apart from her father, she had no impression of any other man. Including the servants and guards who had worked on Moonsleeping Island for many years, yet she was the fairy whom all the men on the island dared not offend.

It’s just that she herself didn’t know it.

Since her first experience leaving the island at the age of ten, Feng Yangyue had never taken her off the island again.

She didn't know the real reason behind it, but happily assumed it was because her father wanted to protect her.

So, she obediently stayed on the island, never asking to leave again, living her life peacefully and contentedly.

But now, her peaceful world was about to be shattered…

Blood slowly drained from her face and body; Hua Luo now looked as pale as a fragile glass doll.

Seeing the situation was dire, Qing Miao immediately interrupted the two maids' eager reports and quickly sent them away.

After the two maids left, she immediately went to Hua Luo's side, looking worriedly at the trembling Hua Luo.

"Miss…" Qing Miao's gentle whisper reached Hua Luo's ears, pulling her back from her dazed state. She gazed at her personal maid with her captivating, clear eyes and wept bitterly.

"Qingmiao...Qingmiao..." She collapsed onto Qingmiao, tears streaming down her face like a broken string of pearls.

"Qingmiao, what should I do? I don't want to get married...I don't want to...Qingmiao..." Her voice choked with sobs, she could only utter fragmented words, "I just want to stay by Father's side...I just want to marry him...I don't want anyone else to be my husband...No, no..."

Qingmiao hugged her mistress tightly, her mind blank...

Alas! What could she do? Seeing her mistress cry like this was so heartbreaking!

She desperately wanted to help her! But how could she help her?

She had always known that the only person in her mistress's heart was the Island Lord. From a very young age, her mistress had wanted to marry him.

Although they were father and daughter, the little mistress seemed unconcerned about the constraints of social norms and still deeply loved the Island Lord.

Until she was thirteen, the young lady accidentally discovered a secret sealed in a treasure box—a thick stack of notes left by her biological mother. She realized that she and the island lord were not biologically related; in fact, the island lord was her mother's younger brother.

Qingmiao remembered that when the young lady learned this, she was overjoyed, which only strengthened her resolve—she loved the island lord so much that she didn't care about the constraints of morality.

However, the young lady only told her this, never revealing it to anyone else, keeping it a sweet little secret.

But now—

Heavens! Could the young lady bear this blow? Qingmiao thought bitterly.

No! Hualuo truly couldn't bear it! She had always thought she could stay on Moonsleeping Island forever, with her father…

that was all!

But why wouldn't her father grant her this small wish?

Father…

Whenever she thought of that incomparably handsome man, whose beauty even paintings could not depict, her heart would soften and melt away…

How many times had she dreamed that she was no longer his daughter, but his wife!

That position coveted by countless women… even her own mother disregarded morality, deeply in love with her younger brother—

until her mother was inexplicably abducted by a savage, thus becoming pregnant with her and giving birth to her…

Thinking of this, Hua Luo felt even more sorrowful. Why couldn't she be his wife?

He wasn't even her biological father! Then why could she only suffer such bitter love for him?

Was it… that she wasn't good enough? Or that she wasn't perfect enough?

To become a woman worthy of him, even though she was nominally his daughter, she still studied so hard, absorbing all knowledge and etiquette with all her might, just to be worthy of him.

But what about him?

Did he really not understand where her heart belonged?

As she grew older, she found herself increasingly unable to be satisfied with simply staying by his side and calling him "Father"; how many nights, in her heart, she secretly changed her address to "Yue Mian"!

Yue Mian, Yue Mian, what a beautiful name! In her heart, she never tired of calling him that title; instead, it brought a sweet feeling to her soul…

And she grew increasingly jealous of all the women who approached him, including the beautiful maids who served him, all of whom made her unhappy.

She truly didn't want to be just his daughter; she had always only wanted to be his wife since childhood, and she was increasingly unable to control her greedy heart…

But now, she had received news that she was about to be married off to someone else?!

No! How could she bear it?

Any man's approach filled her with extreme disgust!

Father! I don't want to be your daughter anymore… I want to be your wife… Marry me! Why won't you marry me! Aren't you the one who despises propriety like dirt? She cried out in her heart.

All the sorrow in her heart turned into a torrent of tears, and Hua Luo collapsed into Qing Miao's arms, crying her heart out.

Qing Miao couldn't bear to see her like this. "Miss, shall we go back to our room and rest? Look at you, your clothes are all wet!" Qing Miao repeatedly wiped away her tears, her handkerchief soaked through, practically dripping water.

Hua Luo, limp and weak, let Qing Miao help her back to her room, her whole body utterly exhausted.

While Qing Miao busied herself preparing her change of clothes, she lay alone on the bed, letting tears stream down her face.

Was she destined to stay here and cry? Was there truly no way to salvage the situation?

No! She was unwilling to accept it; she couldn't give up like this.

Trembling, she wiped away the tears from her eyes and cheeks, slowly sat up, and made up her mind—no! She would try.

She gathered her thoughts and called for Qing Miao.

"Qing Miao—Qing Miao…" Hua Luo's soft and beautiful voice still carried a hint of hoarseness from sobbing.

Qingmiao then entered the inner room, carrying a stack of clothes. "What is it, Miss?"

"Qingmiao, help me get dressed. I want to see Father—" Hualuo glanced at the clothes Qingmiao was holding. "That set of clothes is a bit plain. Could you help me find that new outfit that was just finished a few days ago? I want to wear it for Father."

She removed the white dress, now soaked with tears, and then her undergarments and trousers, revealing her flawless

, exquisite body. Hualuo had never dared to look at her own body more than once, fearing she would lose her decorum and decorum.

But today, she suddenly made up her mind, lowering her head to carefully examine her skin, more delicate than snowflakes.

"Qingmiao, look, isn't my body beautiful?"

"Very beautiful, Miss." Qingmiao smiled as she applied flower essence to Hualuo.

Anyone who saw the young lady's body would probably only sigh!

Every curve of her body was so perfectly proportioned.

“Then… do you think,” Hua Luo paused, blushing, biting her lip before continuing, “Father… would he also think my body is beautiful?”

“Miss…” Qing Miao looked up at Hua Luo in surprise, but quickly withdrew her gaze, knowing it would embarrass her mistress. “Yes, the Island Lord would definitely think Miss’s body is beautiful.”

Qing Miao shook the smooth, fine fabric in her hands, carefully dressing her naked mistress.

The vibrant purple, the elegant purple, the delicate pink, transformed into soft, flowing silk, lightly draping over her delicate body, perfectly hugging her alluring figure. The high-waisted skirt accentuated her slender waist. A delicate white jade chain encircled the waistband, with a pair of white jade pendants hanging beside it, tinkling melodiously as she walked.

Hua Luo happily stroked the soft, smooth silk, very satisfied with its effect on her.

She twirled in front of the bronze mirror, her skirt rippling around her like gentle purple waves, light and beautiful.

"Qingmiao, am I beautiful?" she asked her personal maid again.

"Yes! More beautiful than a celestial being," Qingmiao replied honestly.

"Then, I'm going to find Father—don't come with me, I'll go by myself." Frankly, she was terrified of her father seeing Qingmiao!

Especially as she grew older, she couldn't bear the inexplicable spark in her father's eyes when he saw Qingmiao! Although she, being young and naive, didn't understand its meaning, she felt an overwhelming aversion.

No! She didn't want her father to look at Qingmiao like that, even though Qingmiao seemed to never show any particular reaction, she still didn't want it!

Father was hers, and she rejected any woman who could attract his attention, including the loyal Qingmiao.

Therefore, she decided to go to find her father, and she would go alone; she would never allow him to see Qingmiao.

"Yes." Actually, Qingmiao could vaguely sense Hualuo's hostility towards her in this regard, and she cooperated fully with Hualuo's wishes, avoiding the island lord whenever possible. But…

she frowned, unwilling to think about those unbearable things that made her heart ache.

Even if her mistress was unwilling, for her safety, she still had to follow and protect her.

Therefore, she always hid in the shadows, silently following, protecting Hualuo without disturbing her.

Was this… going against her mistress's wishes?

*********

Hualuo stood outside the study door for a long time, hesitating to move forward.

She had heard from Zipiao that her father had been in the study for an hour or so, but when she arrived outside, she still couldn't muster the courage to push open the door.

Because her father never liked being disturbed when he was in the study.

What should she do? She asked herself: Should she just barge in like this?

But… what if her father was unhappy?

But—the thought of marrying someone else made her lose all hesitation. She raised her slender white hand, gently pushed open the door, and quietly went inside.

The study was large, containing nearly 100,000 books, all of which were extremely valuable. However, she disliked stepping into this study, fearing that the old books might be accidentally damaged.

Therefore, she rarely visited this place. She walked cautiously, wondering to herself, "Where is Father?"

Just then, she suddenly saw a stunningly handsome man sitting at a large desk by the window, leisurely flipping through a book. His figure, illuminated by the sunlight, was even more captivating.

She froze in her tracks.

But before she could speak, a pleasant, deep, magnetic voice rose gently, "Hualuo, is there something you need from your father?"

Feng Yangyuemian didn't look up, his dark eyes still focused intently on the book on the table.

"Father...Father...I..." she stammered, all her courage vanishing the moment she saw him.

"Hmm?" Feng Yangyuemian rested his chin on his hand, raising his eyelashes to look at her, waiting for her to continue.

"I..." She cleared her throat, trying to calm the pounding in her chest. After a long pause, she finally mustered the courage to express her feelings, "I want to stay by your side and be with you for the rest of my life... I don't want to get married..."

Although her father had never scolded her, for some reason, she was still very afraid of him in certain aspects!

"You don't want to get married?" Feng Yangyuemian's beautiful dark eyes gazed at her calmly, a faint smile playing on his lips.

"Then what should I do? I can't selfishly keep you by my side forever and delay your marriage!"

"It doesn't matter, I don't care. Father, I don't want to get married... I... I just want to stay by your side."

"Do you want to become an old maid?" He chuckled softly, stood up, and walked to her, lifting her shy face with his large hand. "How can you bear to waste your beautiful face? You may be willing, but I can't!"

"Father..." It seemed her father was determined to marry her off to someone else. What should she do?

Hua Luo's face turned deathly pale instantly, and tears welled up in her eyes involuntarily, but she dared not let them fall. "Father, I don't want to get married... Please! Don't marry me off to someone else!"

Hua Luo impulsively hugged Feng Yang Yue Mian's waist, determined to express her feelings regardless of everything.

"Father! I love you, Father!" She only heard a soft sigh above her head, and then a pair of large, white hands gently landed on her slender shoulders, pushing her away from his broad chest without applying any force.

"Hua Luo, do you know what you're saying?"

"I know, I know!" she shouted desperately, tilting her head back to look into those deep, dark eyes that had always captivated her. "I love you! I mean it—Father, I don't want to be your daughter! I don't want to! I want to be your wife—"

"You—" Upon hearing this, Feng Yangyuemian frowned, his thick, handsome eyebrows furrowing as he looked at her thoughtfully. "Hua Luo, don't forget you are my daughter."

"No! Father, I know everything..." Her eyes blinked, and tears streamed down her face. "I'm not your biological daughter, and you're not my biological father..."

"Oh?" He smiled faintly, releasing her slender shoulders. "You know everything?" She nodded, tears still rolling down her cheeks like pear blossoms in the rain, making her look even more pitiful.

But he remained unmoved, turning back to his desk and sitting down. "Hua Luo, no matter what the truth may be, to me, you will always be my daughter."

"But, Father… I don't…"

"Hua Luo, in this life I will only ever consider you my daughter—" He calmly cut her off, his dark eyes calmly meeting hers. "There will be no one else." His calm words shattered the dream she had held for so many years. Her

tears fell even more fiercely—

but, I love you, I don't want to be your daughter! She wanted to shout it out loud, but upon looking into Feng Yang Yue Mian's eyes, she lost all courage once more.

Hua Luo could only choke out a sob, covering her face and weeping, turning and running out of the study. In her heart, she cried out in anguish: She had been rejected! She had been rejected!

Overwhelmed by grief, her heart could barely bear the pain of being rejected by the man she loved. Hua Luo stumbled aimlessly, her small, delicate feet, never having run so freely before, making her steps even more unsteady…

She ran and cried, her blurry, tear-filled eyes seeing only a blurry world. She could no longer see where she was going, only knowing one cruel truth…

She loved her father, but he didn't love her…

Heavens! He didn't love her! He didn't love her!

Why? Why? Tears streamed down her beautiful face; she was heartbroken and devastated.

“Miss… Miss…” Suddenly, a soft voice called from behind. It was Qing Miao.

She had known something was wrong as soon as she saw Hua Luo run out of the study, her face covered! She immediately rushed out from her hiding place and caught up with her.

Hearing the familiar voice, Hua Luo's fragile heart relaxed, and she instantly lost consciousness, fainting and falling into a silent, deep sleep…

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