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A man's confession of guilt after being ensnared in a sea of desire, a betrayer's confession - Chapter Seventy-Four: Facing His Wife 2 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-06-08  
The elevator doors opened, and Su Feng stepped out first. Ye Ziyan followed a beat behind, quietly pulling me aside. Only after my wife had left did I say, "She's a little emotionally unstable; please take good care of her!"
I nodded to indicate that I understood, pretending to be calm, though inwardly I was just as anxious as my wife. After Ye Ziyan finished speaking, she caught up with Su Feng, deliberately keeping her distance from me. She had suddenly changed her personality, no longer showing any possessiveness towards me in front of my wife. I knew her intention, ignored her, and caught up with my wife ahead.
My wife seemed a little dazed, even disoriented while walking. When I reminded her that the car was parked over there, she snapped out of it and actually thanked me. The awkwardness created by that polite formality made me uncomfortable, and I couldn't respond. That one sentence seemed to have widened the distance between us considerably.
Before getting into the car, Su Feng waved goodbye to my wife and me, gesturing that we should call each other if anything happened. I forced a smile and nodded, and the couple drove off first.
My wife's reaction made my already tense heart even more flustered. She tried to open the car door several times but couldn't, so I had to open it for her from the inside before she could get in. On the drive home, she kept avoiding my gaze, looking out the window to avoid any contact with me.
The atmosphere was tense. I didn't know how to start the conversation. At first, I wanted to ask her how her night was, but then I felt it was inappropriate and didn't dare to ask. I thought of many words of concern, but they were swallowed back down my throat.
Emotions are contagious, and my wife's emotions affected me, causing my heart to ache. The atmosphere in the car became oppressive. Several times I wanted to turn on the music to dispel this uncomfortable atmosphere, but I was probably afraid that any action would make the situation worse, and in the end I didn't have the courage to press the switch.
We didn't say a word until we got home. When she took off her high heels at the door, she almost fell because she was unsteady on her feet, but luckily I was there to catch her.
This was our first physical contact since last night. But my wife's reaction was a bit unexpected. As soon as she stood up, she pulled her hand away from mine as if she had been electrocuted, as if she was afraid of being touched by me.
Before I could say anything, she hurriedly ran back to the bedroom and closed the door. Looking at my empty palms, I began to doubt whether my decision last night was the right one, and whether it would backfire and push our relationship to an irreparable state.
I then went back to the bedroom, only to find the door locked from the inside. I stood at the door for a few minutes, wondering whether to knock or use the key to open it.
Finally, I knocked on the door and called softly, "Yunjuan!" That's my nickname for my wife. After a few seconds of no response, I raised my voice and called twice more, but still no response.
I was sure she heard me, but she just didn't want to respond. Seeing her reaction, I gave up on the idea of using my key. I stood in the doorway and said, "I'm in the living room. Call me if you're hungry or need anything."
After waiting for a while, there was still no response, so I could only slink away and sit on the sofa.
Time passed by, and the quietness of the house made me a little scared. I turned on the TV, but turned the volume down so as not to disturb her, and I just couldn't concentrate on watching it.
My mind was in turmoil. I gazed out the window, reminiscing about the happy days I shared with my wife. I tried hard to pinpoint when our relationship began to change, but after thinking for a long time, I couldn't find the answer. Our lives were always so uneventful, without any major upheavals, so there was simply no way to trace it back.
Images flashed through my mind like a slideshow, and I slowly recalled everything that had happened recently: the first time I met Ye Ziyan that night, all the memories she left me with, and the crazy scene from last night.
At that moment, I couldn't help but think of my wife and Su Feng. What exactly happened between them after they entered that room? Was my wife helpless, or happy? Or was she as wild as Ye Ziyan and I were? These thoughts troubled me, and they might be troubling my wife as well!
Suddenly, a heart-wrenching look flashed before my eyes—the resigned, desperate look in my wife's eyes as Su Feng led her through the door. I don't know if it was the alcohol, Ye Ziyan's influence, or our love? Our marriage? Or perhaps she felt that if she missed that chance, she'd never have another. Too many emotions overwhelmed me, preventing me from firmly holding her hand and saving her.
Does my wife hate me? Or is there another reason? Thinking about this, I couldn't sit still any longer. I got up, ran back to the bedroom door, knocked, and called out, "Yunjuan! Yunjuan...open the door quickly!"
The knocking grew more urgent, and the shouts grew louder, but the house remained deathly silent, with no response. I suddenly became afraid that she might not be able to handle the pressure, or that she was afraid to face me, and might do something foolish.
Without hesitation, I pulled out my keys, opened the door, and rushed inside. The door was pushed open forcefully, slamming against the wall with a loud bang.
I didn't care if the door was broken; I rushed into the house, frantically searching and calling my wife's name. There was no one around. My heart clenched. I smashed open the bathroom door, but it was still empty. Although I didn't find her, I also didn't see the horrifying sight of her lying helplessly in a pool of blood.
I rushed back outside and searched carefully. Finally, I saw a small bulge under the blanket on the bed. It was barely noticeable unless you looked closely, and I was in such a hurry that I hadn't noticed it before.
This relieved me, and my gripping heart eased a little. A surge of anger still welled up inside me, annoyed that she hadn't responded to my calls, making me worry for nothing. But when I saw the figure under the blanket, all my anger vanished, replaced by a heart full of tenderness, a feeling of having lost something and then regained it, making me cherish it all the more.
I slowly approached and sat on the edge of the bed. Whether she didn't want to see me or was afraid to face me, there was no movement under the covers. I hesitated for a moment, but decided to take a look at her. With a pounding heart and trembling hands, I slowly lifted the covers.
When I saw the figure under the covers, my heart skipped a beat. She was hugging her arms, her legs tucked to her chest, her whole body curled up in a ball. Looking at her, I could almost feel that she was sleeping alone in a void, a dark, boundless world, where there was no light, no sound, no smell, nothing at all, only her lying there quietly, helpless and alone.
I'm increasingly doubting whether my initial decision was the right one.

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