Married couples (also known as divorced couples or fallen leaves) 7

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23 08:11:59

VII. Shanghai Stories
Marrying a good woman is like finding a safe haven in a storm; marrying a bad woman is like encountering a storm in the harbor.
—Theon
Shanghai, as China's largest metropolis, has always been synonymous with fashion. I've been here a few times on business trips before, but each time it was a fleeting visit, leaving little impression. This time, because I had more time, I finally had the opportunity to experience this bustling metropolis.
Towering buildings, narrow streets, flashing neon lights, and dazzling street stalls... everything exists in such a contradictory yet reasonable way, like a woman who has experienced many hardships in the world, who reforms herself and gains status in the process, but finds it hard to forget the past, and thus remains elegant and worldly indifferent.
I tried to use complex language to describe my feelings about it. But to be honest, I just couldn't like this place.
Putting aside the hot and humid climate, the key issue is that this city doesn't give me any sense of cultural depth. Although the Shanghai business community has spent over a decade transforming it into a world-class modern metropolis, the city still leaves me with an impression of superficiality, restlessness, and indifference.
Every time I go out to run errands, the car travels along the overpass, with rows of tall buildings standing side by side, as if I'm navigating a tropical jungle made of steel and concrete. Looking out the car window, the pedestrians on the ground look like ants, and the trees look like toys. I feel that if people lived in this jungle, they would be insignificant and not worth mentioning.
Whenever I encounter this situation, I can't help but think of a movie I watched before, a horror science fiction film from the 1920s and 30s called "Metropolis".
Fear. I feel fear coming to this city. It's the only city I've ever been to that makes me feel unsafe.
A few days after I arrived in Shanghai, Ms. A called me and asked when I was going to meet her parents. I then told her that I was on a business trip, and a very long one at that. She sounded quite angry on the phone, saying that she had already made arrangements with her parents and asked if I could take some time to come back and take care of things before returning to Shanghai.
I thought to myself, "How could that be? The reason I came here is to escape your control." But I told her out loud, "I can't help it, I'm too busy with work, I really can't get away."
For the next while, she called me every day and sent me several text messages, still urging me to come back and meet her parents, while I responded with lukewarm replies. She also said that Pipi kept talking about me, wanting me to come back soon. I thought, maybe she's got her eye on some valuable thing she wants me to buy again?
As time went on, I grew tired of this insincere perfunctory attitude and simply stopped answering calls and replying to texts. She clearly sensed my indifference, and the frequency of her calls gradually decreased.
During that time, she came to our company twice, probably to verify if I was lying to her. How could I possibly lie to you? I'm an honest person, I wouldn't lie to you; I genuinely went on a business trip.
My boss is a lecherous old man. When he called me about this, he said, "She's a real beauty. She's got a seductive vibe from head to toe. She's a million times better than your shrewish ex-wife. You're lucky, kid. It must be really great to sleep with her, right?"
I chuckled and replied, "Hmm, not bad! She's absolutely charming and a master of all trades. But I'm afraid you're not capable enough to satisfy her."
Upon hearing this, the boss immediately perked up and said, "Wow, is it that good? Damn, when can we see for ourselves?"
“Great! How about I give it to you as a token of my respect? Give me an extra 20,000 yuan bonus, and I'll sell you her contact information.”
The boss said, "Oh, you're tired of all these beautiful women? I didn't realize you looked so honest, but you're actually a beast in human clothing, even more of a womanizer than me. Twenty thousand is too expensive, though. How about a 90% discount? Two thousand is more like it. Two thousand, let's make a deal. At your age, you're not worth that price... Hahaha..."
About two months later, Ms. A called me again, asking if I had returned. Actually, I had already finished my business trip and was packing my bags to go home. But I still lied, saying that the mission was very complicated and would take several more months.
"Shoujie, why don't you ever call me? Is something on your mind?" Her tone indicated that she already had a premonition that something bad was about to happen.
Now that things have come to this, I don't want to hide it from her anymore, so I answered her directly: "Xiao A, I don't think we're a good match."
"Why isn't it suitable?" she retorted. "Aren't you happy when we're together?"
"Yes...uh...no..." When she asked that, I didn't know how to answer. After thinking for a moment, I said, "I feel a lot of pressure being with you."
"What pressure did I put on you?" she persisted, "When did I put pressure on you?"
"Sigh, it's a long story, but never mind, I don't want to say more. Anyway, I just feel like we're not right for each other. You see, we got along really well when we first met, but then we were always arguing. To be honest, I'm exhausted. I'm not a naive young man anymore, I don't want to go through all this trouble. I just want some peace and quiet, this is too tiring for me." I hardened my heart and delivered my death sentence to her.
"I was a little mentally unstable during that period, but I was also eager to marry you," the woman quickly defended herself. "Shoujie, as long as you marry me, I promise I'll take good care of you and never argue with you again..."
"Forget it, it's not your fault, it's mine." I rejected her appeal: "Being with you is too stressful for me, and Pipi is under a lot of pressure too. I've thought about this pressure for a long time, and I feel like I can't handle it at all. I've also thought about the future for a long time, and I feel that we still lack a lot of understanding. We like different lifestyles, and Pipi is caught in the middle, putting me in a difficult position. Even if we manage to stay together, there will be a lot of conflicts. Forget it, I don't want to live like that."
There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line, followed by a low sob. She said, "I knew it would be like this, Shoujie, how could you be so heartless... What did I do wrong?"
Damn, she doesn't even know where she went wrong at this point. She's hopeless.
Then, choking back tears, she said, "I thought that finding an honest man like you would give me someone to rely on for the rest of my life, but it's all for nothing again..."
Hearing this, I felt a pang of sadness. Women, oh women, I'm not afraid of you showing off in front of me, but please don't cry in front of me, I can't bear it. I reminded myself not to be fooled by her facade of weakness; it's a trap, and if I step on it, I'll be shattered to pieces.
So I moved my phone away a little, trying not to hear her sobbing. When her crying subsided a bit, I comforted her, saying, "Sigh, you're destined to meet a man more successful than me."
"Shoujie, if you don't want me, fine, but why are you mocking me?"
"No, no." She didn't know I was telling the truth: "I actually like you a lot, but really, I'm so far from meeting your standards. It's my fault..."
After saying that, I hung up the phone and turned it off without waiting for her reply. I was afraid that if I said anything more, I wouldn't be able to hold back her tears.
The breakup with girl A was a huge blow to me, and I was depressed for a long time. Although I was the one who dumped her, it also meant that all the hopes and dreams I had at the beginning were shattered, and it was another denial of my previous beliefs. Thinking about the sweetness and emotion we shared when we first met fills me with an indescribable pain.
But even in pain, I still endure it, no longer as easily softened as I was when I was younger.
Life has gradually made me stronger, until I became very resilient.
在上海那段时间，我被客户安排在浦东一家“二星级”宾馆里，实际上就是一家条件比较好的招待所，离东方明珠电视塔很近。每天晚饭后，我步行都能到黄浦江边散步。一般去上海的外地人，都喜欢在陆家嘴眺望东方明珠塔和金茂大厦；而我恰恰相反，从东方明珠塔眺望陆家嘴。与外滩川流不息的人群相比，浦东这边到了晚上，倒是显得非常静谧。
到上海的第二天，我就给几个在上海工作的大学同学打了电话，告诉他们我来了。我大学本科阶段，班上有四个同学分配到上海工作，后来还有两个同学调到上海，一共是六个。读研究生时也有几个同学到了上海，但研究生同学的感觉，跟本科同学的感觉不一样，总是浅了一些，所以我只通知了本科同学。
通报了我到上海的信息后，几个同学表示要请我吃顿饭，聚一聚。那天晚上来了五个同学：班花，麻杆，小上海，刘皇叔，老马。当然啦，这都是外号，我们上学时大家喜欢互起绰号。
这五个人里，只有“班花”一个女的。虽然名爲“班花”，实际上是个矮胖女生。只是我们那班上女生实在太少了，五六十个人只有五六个女生，其他几个女生，长的实在是太惨不忍睹了；唯有她，虽然矮了点胖了点，但五官还算端正，皮肤也不错，所以被我们誉爲“班花”。当然，她这班花也算名副其实，即便是矬子里边拔将军。
另外几个男生，“麻杆”的意思很好理解，就是瘦的跟麻杆似的。但十多年不见，麻杆却发福了，大腹便便的，腮帮子上的肉都嘟噜下来了，像个弥勒佛。要不是他自我介绍是麻杆，还有他那两道标志性的八字眉作证据，我还真认不出他来。麻杆这些年混得不错，小公司开得红红火火，但看样子生活习惯可不是很健康。
“小上海”本身就是上海人，典型上海小男人形象，瘦小机灵。这厮最大的特点，是跟吃了长生不老药似的，特别耐，毕业都十几年了居然一点不显老，脸上光熘熘的一点皱纹都没有，气质也还是那副学生样。看到他那副青春永驻的样子，我禁不住想：人到中年的他，要是跑学校里冒充大学生泡小女生，估计也能蒙混过关。当问到他现在在哪里高就，他说在一家it公司打工。我开玩笑说：你还打什么工啊，你该开个美容讲座，向那些希望红顔不老的阔太太们介绍一下你永葆青春的秘诀，保准你数钱数到手抽筋。
“刘皇叔”姓刘，上大学时他喜欢到地摊上买非法出版的黄色小说回来看，所以我们叫他“刘黄书”。后来，在他的坚决抗争下，又改口叫成“刘皇叔”。其实刘黄书的外号也挺冤，那些低级趣味的书我们都爱不释手。那个年代，这类书就是我们的性啓蒙教材。我记得他买的最多的书，就是一个署名“西村寿行”的日本人写的黄色小说系列。当时我们都是硬着看的，而这个西村寿行也算名副其实，专写各种兽行。可我们都是吃白食的，刘皇叔老实，总是他出钱买，我们白看。老吃白食也觉得过意不去，出于感恩心理我们送他一个外号。谁让他姓刘呢，那刘黄书这个外号就非他莫属。
“老马”是回民，不过是个百分之百汉化的回民，吃起猪肉来那叫起劲，筷子轮得比我们这些汉民都欢实。这厮天生是个批判家，总是一副愤世嫉俗的样子，跟韩非子一样整日在孤愤中度过。不过，他品行可是真好，这类孤愤的批判家往往都是海瑞一样的道德完美主义者。他毕业后到了政府机关，可是混了十几年还是个副科级干部。想想也是，现在这个官场，怎么可能容忍一个海瑞式干部掌握大权呢？这官场一向奉行“劣币驱逐良币”的潜规则，越是两袖清风，你越是混不上去。
大家在饭店包间里落座，我忍不住点了点人头，这才发现，“遥知兄弟登高处，遍插茱萸少一人”。
少了谁呢？少了“欧公子”。
“欧公子”是我们班最帅的一个男生，长着一张中西合璧、棱角分明的面庞，深眼窝，高鼻梁，天生头发微卷，双目炯炯有神。尤其是他的那个双眼皮，根本就不是东方人的“小双”，而是西方人才会有的“大双”，显得目光深邃而明亮。那眼神带电，看男人一眼让男人惭愧，看女人一眼让女人昏倒。而且他的身材特别好，头身比例不是我们这样的七比一，而是西方人种的八比一。他的这副身材和长相，让我总是怀疑他身上是不是具有欧罗巴血统。在大学时，他是全校公认的“四大公子”之首，而且是最欧罗巴化的公子，所以那时我们给他的外号叫“欧公子”。
我们毕业时，欧公子先是分到上海一家国营电器公司，后来跳槽到了一家着名的跨国公司的中国总部。这厮长的帅，有点自恋，在学校时就总是跟我们保持距离，毕业后跟我们来往也不很密切。后来听说他结婚了，找了个上海本地美女，也是在外资公司工作的。郎才女貌嘛，在我们同学中间也被传爲一段佳话。
见欧公子没来，我还以爲他的自恋症又发作了，就随口扁了他一句：“哟，欧公子又不来啊，他老人家的大驾还挺难请的嘛。”
听我说到欧公子，大伙儿的情绪忽然变得低落下来。静默了十几秒钟，班花开口说话了：“欧公子的事，你不知道？”
“欧公子？什么事？”我被班花给问住了。
“欧公子快不行了。”班花看我的表情，确认我真的不知道，就说：“得了尿毒症。”
“什么？！尿毒症？”我大吃一惊，下巴都差点掉桌子上。实在是太意外了，以至于连说话都有些结巴：“不……不会吧？这……这怎么可能？”
“是，守杰，都好几年了。”刘皇叔脸色阴郁地补充道：“欧公子这个病很麻烦，透析不说，身体一天比一天差，现在每天都得透析。除非换肾，否则没希望了。”
“啊？”我被他们的话惊得瞠目结舌，心想真是世事难料啊，这么一个超级帅哥，怎么就得了这种病呢？
“唉，人这一辈子，指不定遇着什么事呢。”老马在旁边感叹道：“本来得了这个病就够倒霉了，结果他老婆见他病了，立马跟他分道扬镳，离婚了。”
“什么？离婚了？”刚从震惊中缓过劲来的我再度被震惊了，靠，这顿饭吃的，没吃到什么菜，全吃惊了：“爲什么啊？”
“还不是因爲他的病？哼。”老马满脸不屑地谈论这件事，一副嗤之以鼻的样子，愤世嫉俗的毛病又发作了：“那女人一看他有病了，花钱，嫌他麻烦，怕耽误自己，立马一脚蹬了他。哼，典型的上海女人做派，有福同享可以，有难同当可不行。正是应了那句老话，夫妻本是同林鸟，大难临头各自飞。”
“嗳，老马，不要以偏概全嘛，上海女人也有好的呀。”小上海不服气老马的话，马上出来爲上海女人主持公道。他说话总是细声细气的，甜的有些发腻。以前在学校时，老马和小上海就是一对天敌。俩人就跟说相声似的：老马愤世嫉俗，小上海四平八稳；老马粗声大气，小上海吴侬软语；一个逗哏，一个捧哏；只要老马出马，小上海必然上马迎战。说也奇怪，这俩人吵归吵，可就是总爱待在一块，大概是性格互补吧。
“或许有好的，只是比例低了点，一百个里边挑不出一个。”老马一边抽烟，一边依旧以愤世嫉俗的口吻丢下了这句话。
“那……我明天得去看看欧公子。”知道这个消息，震惊过后就是难过。尽管以前公子跟我们联系不多，但毕竟是同窗四年，怎么说也得去看看他。于是我问道：“怎么跟他联系？”
“没法联系，失踪了。”班花接上话了。
“失踪了？”我又吃了一惊。
“是，失踪了。”一直没吭气的麻杆这时插话了：“他老婆跟他离婚后，他就失踪了，大概是去年年初的事情，从公司里辞职了，从家里也搬走了，手机也停机了，我们都找不到他。”
“啊？……那……你们就没问问他老婆？”我急切地问道：“一个大活人……就能被人间蒸发了？”
"What's there to ask? She doesn't know either. Divorcing over this? Do you think she cares about his life or death? If she cared, she wouldn't have done this." Old Ma seemed to hate that woman the most. He took two deep drags on his cigarette and said through gritted teeth, "When Young Master Ou first got sick, he was still dreaming of a kidney transplant, but his wife controlled the money, and he couldn't get it from her. She even told him, 'With your illness, a kidney transplant is expensive, and the prognosis isn't good, so it's better not to spend the money.' Tell me, is that human? This kind of woman who kicks someone when they're down has no conscience at all."
"This...this is too unexpected." I was so shocked that I couldn't recover for a long time.
“Hey, Lao Ma, you have to think about them too.” Seeing Lao Ma getting cynical again, Xiao Shanghai immediately jumped in to argue with him: “Don’t you think about it? They bought a house and a car, and they need money to pay off the loan. His wife is a weak woman, and she must be very upset about this. The problem is that this disease is too difficult to treat. Even if they do get treatment, it will bankrupt them, and in the end, they will lose both their money and their wife.”
"You're talking nonsense!" Old Ma flared up again, slamming his fist on the table. But we all knew that despite his bluster, he wouldn't actually turn on Little Shanghai: "You Shanghainese are so good at calculating accounts, isn't that your skill? The problem is, if you calculate like this, where's the affection? Shanghai women are so wicked, it's all because of you little men who spoil them, they're really despicable."
"You're generalizing. Just because you're divorced doesn't mean you hate all Shanghai women." Little Shanghai continued her heated argument with Old Ma.
"What?!" I've lost count of how many times I've been shocked: "Old Ma, you're divorced too?"
"Oh, yes. Didn't I tell you?" Old Ma asked.
“No, you never told me that,” I shook my head and replied.
"Oh, so you didn't say anything. There's no point in publicizing this."
"What about the child?" I know that Old Ma has a five or six-year-old son.
"Follow me."
"Why not with his mother?" I asked.
"Her? Why would she want her? She's still waiting to marry a dragon or a phoenix, how could she bear to drag along a little brat? Who would want her then? Humph." Old Ma replied through gritted teeth.
“Old Ma, your son is still a member of the Ma family, so there’s nothing wrong with him following you.” Little Shanghai got excited again. This guy seems to feel uncomfortable if he doesn’t pinch Old Ma.
“There’s nothing wrong with her following me, but the problem is that she’s not even willing to pay child support. Isn’t this child her own flesh and blood? Even animals have a mother’s love for their offspring, but some women are even worse than animals.” At this point, Old Ma was furious again.
“But she’s a vulnerable woman too. Unlike men, she can’t earn money. She has to plan for her future.” I was truly impressed by Little Shanghai. He was the uninvited defense lawyer for Shanghai women.
"Sigh, alright, you two stop arguing. It's not easy for Shoujie to come all this way, so let's not bring up these things." Seeing that we were all feeling sullen, Liu Huangshu quickly stepped in to smooth things over: "Life and death are determined by fate, wealth and honor are determined by heaven. Let's live for today, and make the most of every day. Come on, everyone, let's drink to Shoujie's arrival!"
"Cheers!" Everyone stood up in unison, their glasses clinking together.
After eating for a while, the prettiest girl in class suddenly seemed to remember something and asked me, "Shoujie, tell me about your situation?"
"Me?" I was taken aback, then said, "I'm just like that."
"Is your daughter at school yet?" the class beauty asked again. "How's Xiao Zhang doing?"
The "Xiao Zhang" that the class beauty mentioned is my ex-wife, Zhang Jiali. When she asked this question, I was momentarily at a loss for words. After thinking for a moment, I figured we were old classmates, and there was nothing to hide, so I told the truth: "Yes, we're divorced."
"What? You got divorced too?" Everyone was surprised again. Now it was my turn to give them a surprise.
"It's not that I don't understand, it's just that the world changes so fast. I never imagined that even someone like you, who always talks about responsibility, would get divorced," the class beauty sighed.
“But that’s normal.” Old Ma spoke up again: “Back in school, I felt that you two weren’t a good match. The differences between you two in terms of background, personality, upbringing, and interests were enormous. I didn’t think you two would last, but seeing how determined you were and how you managed to get her to go to Beijing, I thought you might have worked things out. It seems I wasn’t wrong after all.”
"Uh...yes, we just can't get along," I replied dejectedly. I thought to myself, "Old Ma, you're such a wise man after the event. Why didn't you say that sooner?"
"There are so many divorces these days," the class beauty exclaimed. "Look at the seven of us sitting here, including Young Master Ou, three of us are divorced. That's a really high ratio, almost half of us."
"There's nothing we can do about it. Too many women these days don't uphold traditional virtues; morality has declined!" Old Ma became agitated again; he always spoke in this critical, realistic style. I think Old Ma should be transferred to the Central Commission for Discipline Inspection. With his integrity and incorruptibility, he could definitely turn around the corrupt and decadent atmosphere in officialdom.
"Hey, Lao Ma, it's not entirely the women's fault. There are plenty of bad men too," Little Shanghai chimed in again, defending women. I really suspect he's been bribed by the Women's Federation; how come he always sides with women whenever they're mentioned?
After the dinner, Lao Ma drove me back to the hotel, chatted briefly, and then left.
I leaned against the bed, lit a cigarette, and for some reason, thought of Young Master Ou again. His situation made me feel a pang of sadness, like a fellow rabbit mourning the death of a fox. Although I hadn't seen Young Master Ou, I could easily imagine the utter despair he must have felt when he vanished. Perhaps he's now wandering the world? Perhaps he's returned to his parents? Perhaps he's already ended his own life? ...Oh God, I couldn't bear to think any further.
Alas, marriage, it should be a warm harbor, a foundation for mutual support. Who knew that modern marriage would become the most unreliable thing?
I couldn't help but recall scenes from Western marriages in movies I'd seen before. The priests at the wedding would ask the couple: "Do you take this woman to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part? Do you take this woman to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?"
These few simple sentences summarize the responsibilities and obligations of marriage. When people are willing to enter into a marriage contract and walk down the aisle, they should abide by these responsibilities and fulfill these obligations.
But how many people can actually do it?

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Married couples (also known as divorced couples or fallen leaves) 7

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