How a Stepfather is Made

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

My stepfather was actually my junior high school classmate; we weren't originally in the same school. My mom used to teach at the county's
top high school, and I also went there. I was in my first year of junior high at the county's top high school. But in my second year, my mom offended
the school administration, and they used a teaching assignment opportunity to transfer her to a rural school. My dad was working on the railway at that time and rarely came
home. My mom was afraid I'd go astray without supervision—well, I was already starting to go astray at that point,
hanging out with older kids, learning to smoke, drink, and watch videos. My mom didn't even tell me; she just transferred me to the rural school too
. She didn't care if I went to a good school; she just wanted me to stay out of trouble. She also wanted me to experience some hardship and learn some manners
. I guess many of you probably had parents who deliberately transferred you from the city to another school when you were young, just to make
you suffer. That's what happened to me. After that, I was in my second year of junior high at the rural school. Our area is all
mountains; any slightly flat land is either the county town or other small towns. The other villages, including the township, were all deep in the mountains. This was
around 2003. Our village, which was supposedly the township government seat,
didn't even have a road at that time. It was about 20-30 li (approximately 10-15 kilometers) from the nearest town. The remaining villages in the township were mostly in mountain valleys,
accessible only by foot, and also several dozen li (approximately 15 kilometers) apart. They were very isolated, and the villagers rarely left the mountains. Now, let
me tell you about our school. The walls were made of broken bricks, topped with thorns and broken glass. The gate was a peeling
iron gate with pointed tops. The classrooms and dormitories were drafty. We had to
make do with newspapers and planks because we didn't have the money to replace the broken windows. My mom was given the best room, a single dormitory room. I shared a
large communal room with other boys, twenty people in one room with ten people on each side of the heated brick bed. In winter, I
often woke up freezing at night, my nose icy cold.
Now, let me tell you about my classmate. He was older than us, two years older. He started school late and had to
repeat a grade because he didn't do well in school. Their family was so poor they were practically destitute. His mother had long wanted to stop him from going to school. His father was in poor health
, and his mother wasn't much better. I don't know how they raised such a tall son. I was fifteen then, and he was
seventeen, already over 1.8 meters tall, with a very well-proportioned build and a muscular physique. He was just a bit dark-skinned, and apart from his face
resembling his parents, he didn't look like them at all. You've probably all seen those kinds of people in school—bad at studying, no matter how
hard they try. It's not that they don't want to learn, it's just that their efforts don't work. But they're incredibly skilled at other things. My classmate
was that kind of person. And he was particularly interested in me—maybe that's not the right word. Anyway, you
know, when you move to a new environment, you either get bullied or isolated, and I was the latter. But he was
the first person to actively befriend me. To this day, I don't know, and I don't dare ask, if he genuinely wanted to be friends with me,
or if he was already interested in my mother from the start. And this guy, although tall and clever, was also a little naive
. He always wanted me to talk about things in the city. I was a bit mischievous back then, so I bragged to him until he almost idolized me. I
bragged about how I could take on several people at once in fights, and about the delicious food in the city. As I mentioned earlier, his family was incredibly poor. His father was
a good-for-nothing, and his mother was, well, an old maid, so he was made to do everything from a young age. He could do almost anything.
His mother had long wanted him to stay in school and work, but the principal insisted on keeping him. Back then, there were
assessments for compulsory education, and dropout rates were one of them. The principal personally handled his mother's case. He
waived all fees, which barely allowed him to stay. So, as I told you, this was a very complicated matter; many factors
needed to be present for it to work.
After that, we became close, I forget exactly when it started, but it must have
started as soon as we arrived. After we got to know each other, he would sometimes come with me to my mother's dormitory. As I mentioned before, that dormitory
was slightly better, but it was still a dilapidated place. Putting everything else aside, the windows were the old-fashioned wooden-framed windows, long rotten, painted green
—the kind of wooden-framed windows that used to be common in rural schools in northern China, broken into four pieces. The door was also in bad shape. He found some
wooden strips, a hammer, and nails and fixed the windows for my mom, basically just reinforcing them
. He also patched up the gaps in the door. Later, another time, I was sitting in a chair in the room, and it was a bit wobbly. The next day, he
fixed the chair in the room for my mom, along with the chairs in the classroom and the teacher's desk. I think that's when he probably started to
like my mom. Now, let me talk about my mom. My mom is that type: round face, short hair, 1.63 meters tall
, and 130 pounds—that was the size back then, especially large. My mom never wears tight clothes in the summer, and she still
does now, afraid that her chest will show and she'll feel ugly. She also rarely wears a bra, because wearing a bra would just make her chest look bigger, she
only wears white tank tops. Two years ago, I saw one of her bras. We're all grown up now and don't care about these things anymore.
I picked it up and saw that my mom had removed the metal bars. I asked her why she was taking it off,
and she said, "It's so tight, how can I go out in public?" You can imagine
how conservative my mom is, even in this day and age. But maybe, maybe Lao Niu—my classmate's surname
is Niu, everyone calls him Lao Niu—he might just like that kind of thing. Sometimes I wonder if it's
related to the fact that he didn't have much contact with women growing up.
Then, as mentioned earlier, he was fixing doors, windows, and chairs, and then it was November. It's cold in the mountains, so in November,
we'd light the stove. We used to have Western-style stoves when we were kids; my mom's dorm had one. Lao Niu did all the
work installing the stove, including the body and the chimney. My mom and I didn't even lift a finger. After that, Lao Niu
would fix the chimney once a week. Lao Niu has one good point. He's quick-witted, clumsy with words, and doesn't talk nonsense. If he were
glib and slick while working, my mom would probably have seen through his ulterior motives long ago. He's genuinely hardworking. Later,
my mom simply moved me to sit next to him because Lao Niu (Old Niu) pays special attention in class. My mom wasn't worried about us
chatting during class; in fact, she wanted Lao Niu to mentor me. But this seating arrangement had a surprising effect. While others
didn't notice, I noticed that Lao Niu wasn't paying attention at all in class. To say he wasn't paying attention might be an exaggeration,
but half of his attention was on my mom, not on the chalk in her hand. Most importantly, sometimes
he was writing notes on slips of paper, not taking notes, just scribbling randomly. When I asked him what he was writing, he wouldn't show me.
I thought he had a crush on our class monitor, who was a girl and quite pretty. Later, I took advantage of his...
I secretly rummaged through his desk and found a wad of notes inside. When I opened them, they were all covered in my mother's name. Some
notes said "Xiujuan, I love you," and my mother's name was Liu Xiujuan. The rest said "Juan, I love you," or just several "Juan"s in a row
. I was stunned. I had a feeling he'd gone this far, but I didn't expect him to be this crazy. Then I started
thinking about what I should do.
Strangely, I was a little angry, my heart was pounding, and my face was burning, but I was very calm
as I considered the situation. I felt excited, nervous, all sorts of emotions, but not panicked at all. Even now, I
think I was remarkably calm when I was thinking about this. Of course, now I realize that this calmness was just a childish
joke, different from true calmness. I hadn't thought through the cause and effect; I was just acting on my childish
assumptions, lacking awareness of the consequences, only lacking the anger I felt. I actually already
had a plan in mind, but it took me a few days to finalize it. I felt I should help him. And the reason I should help him
—don't laugh at me, I was only 15 back then. My thought was that if Lao Niu and I got along, and Lao Niu also got along with my mom
, then my mom wouldn't be so strict with me because of Lao Niu. If I did anything
wrong, Lao Niu could talk to my mom on my behalf, and my life would be easier in the future. Really, I was
so naive and childish back then. This kind of thinking is only something a ten-year-old
would have, but that was the conclusion I reached after considering it for several days. Later, I thought for several more days
about how to help him, and finally decided on a risky method.
Winters in the mountains are cold. The boys' dormitory is so big with two heated brick beds, but only two small stoves, and they're stingy with coal.
I moved into my mom's dormitory a long time ago to live with her. So I decided to talk to my mom and ask her to agree to
Lao Niu moving in too. Whether it worked out or not depended on Lao Niu's own abilities, as long as my mom agreed. My mom knew
the boys' dorm was indeed cold, and since Lao Niu and I were good friends, and she also had a crush on him—not just a crush, but
pure admiration—she agreed. Lao Niu and I shared a bed, which he helped build using bricks and planks,
with a curtain in the middle. My mom slept on the other side of the curtain. The room wasn't big, so the actual space between us
was only about a meter. Lao Niu moved in in December, I forget the exact date. When he moved in, he wanted to
fetch water for my mom to wash her feet and even wanted to pour it out, but my mom stopped him, making her feel embarrassed. However, I
could clearly sense his excitement. But even though I saw his excitement, for three or four days after he arrived,
besides fetching water for my mom to wash her feet—though that only happened one day. My mom wouldn't let him do it, and he
didn't do anything else substantial.
Then, on Sunday night that week, Lao Niu came back from home with some sweet potatoes, and we roasted them in the ashes
. After roasting the sweet potatoes, we washed up and went to sleep. I woke up in the middle of the night, I don't even know what time it was, maybe
one or two in the morning. I heard noises in the room, panting, whispering
, and the bed creaking. I reached around to check on her, but Lao Niu was gone. The blankets were still slightly warm.
I knew he must have done it, because my mom hadn't cried out. Thinking about it now, it's scary. What if my mom hadn't wanted it and had
cried out when Lao Niu got on top of her? That would have been a problem. So I crawled over and lifted a corner of the curtain.
I saw two people moving on top of each other in my mom's bed. After a while, I could see clearly: Lao Niu was on
top of my mom. Both of their upper bodies were exposed, their lower bodies covered by the blankets. Both of them
were naked from the waist up. When I was sleeping, Lao Niu was wearing a vest, and my mom was wearing a thermal undershirt. By this time, I don't know when Lao Niu
had stripped them naked. Lao Niu was grabbing my mom's arm, trying to press it against the pillow. My
mother struggled against him with all her might. Because her upper body was already naked, you could see her breasts
shaking violently in front of her chest as she struggled, like two water bags, her nipples twitching. Both of them were panting, and
there was also a lot of movement under the covers, probably my mother kicking.
At this moment, I heard Lao Niu whisper to my mother, "Juan, listen to me, don't move." My mother's voice was both angry and
anxious, but she tried to keep it very low, saying, "Get down, get down now." The two of them were just struggling like that. Lao Niu said again, "
Don't make a sound, don't make a sound, stay still." My mother said, "Stop making a fuss, get down now." You see, after all, my mother was a woman, and Lao Niu
was used to doing manual labor since he was a child. In the end, Lao Niu forced my mother's hand to the side of the pillow. My mom got really anxious and
started kicking him. She kicked him, saying, "Stop it or I'll scream!" Just as she finished speaking, Lao Niu grunted,
took a breath, and then my mom let out a soft "Ah!" and stopped moving, her legs ceasing to kick. The bed suddenly became quiet. After
a while, Lao Niu started moving again. As soon as he moved, my mom let out another "Ah!" Lao Niu quickly covered her mouth, saying, "Don't make
a sound." My mom struggled free from his hands, saying, "No, I'm going to scream! I can't take it!" Lao Niu then picked up something from the side
—probably my mom's underwear or vest or something—I couldn't see clearly—and stuffed it into her mouth. Then
, while moving, he said, "Juan, don't make a sound, I'll be done in a bit." After a while, he released my mom's hands. My
mom stopped pushing him away. He had just pressed my mom's hands against the pillow, and although he released her,
her hands remained in that position, motionless. He pressed down on my mother, panting and moving, his hands kneading
her breasts like he was kneading steamed buns. As he kneaded, he said, "Juan, you're so good. Juan, I love you so much! I'm so happy
, so comfortable! Juan, I've wanted you for more than just a day or two! I'm so happy!" My mother, with something stuffed in her mouth, couldn't make a sound,
only moaning softly. He sucked on her nipples while he was fucking her. My
mother's moans and groans were ignored by Lao Niu, who just kept talking nonsense, his lower body pounding away. After about ten minutes, he
suddenly lifted his upper body off my mother, grabbing her breasts tightly with both hands. Even
with her mouth gagged, my mother let out a loud moan. He let out a low growl, then collapsed onto my mother. He just kept panting. After
a while, Lao Niu finally rolled off my mother, removed the stuff from her mouth, and
tried to pull her into his arms. My mother pushed him away, lying there panting. He even leaned in to talk to my mom,
asking, "Juan, does it hurt?" (A side note: I've seen Lao Niu's penis before; when we peed together, his penis was dark and...)
He was thick; I'd never seen him hard, but when soft, I'd estimate it was about five inches. I guess he really
hurt my mom, and since she wasn't really prepared for this, she was a bit flustered. He shamelessly kept
coming closer, which really annoyed her. She pushed him aside, rolled over so her face was facing me, her
back to Lao Niu, which startled me so much I quickly pulled the curtain down. I don't know if my mom saw it, but then I heard
her start crying. Soft sobs, and then I heard Lao Niu's voice. I thought to myself, "This feels
like those villains raping innocent women in TV dramas." When Lao Niu was with my mom, he was like a different person
, spouting sweet nothings he never said in real life. By then, the curtain was down,
so I couldn't hear very well. Then, lying on my side, I heard my mom crying softly and Lao Niu talking softly.
After that, embarrassingly, I touched my own penis a few times under the covers and ejaculated. Then I drifted off
to sleep.
I had no idea what happened afterward. When I woke up the next day, neither of them was there. It was already past seven o'clock
, long past morning reading time, and no one woke me up. I quickly got up, washed my face, got dressed, and went to morning reading.
When I entered the classroom, my mom glanced at me but didn't say anything. Then I went to sit next to my seat, and Lao Niu
didn't even look at me, just staring at his book. That day, I felt like my mom was acting like nothing had happened, but Lao Niu seemed
a bit uneasy. When I got back to the dorm that night, I found that Lao Niu had already moved out. I assumed my mom had kicked him out, so I
didn't dare ask her. However, a few years later, when I asked Lao Niu, he said that he had moved out on his own. Actually
, he felt guilty because my mom ignored him the next morning, and he was terrified, so he moved out that afternoon.
Of course, that's another story.
I was actually scared, afraid my mom would blame me. For the past few days, Lao Niu had been a bit dazed. I
considered giving up, but I was unwilling to give up so easily, so I pretended I knew nothing. A few days later, I told my
mom, "How about letting Lao Niu come back to live here?" I didn't mention him moving out. I said it was too cold for him
to care about his pride. My mom said, "I don't care. Let him come back if he wants. It's up to you." I felt my mom might
have tacitly agreed, so I went to find Lao Niu again. Lao Niu absolutely refused to come back. Later, I got impatient and told him my mom said
she didn't care if he came back or not. Then he probably understood something and stopped arguing with me. Then I moved back
. Actually, I was a little uneasy at that time, afraid something might happen again, and what if my mom got really angry?
I didn't sleep well for the first three nights. Then on the fourth night, I woke up, and he wasn't there again. But this time there was no
creaking or breathing; I could only hear people talking softly, and I couldn't make out what they were saying.
I only learned what happened a few years later from Lao Niu. When I peeked through the curtain,
they were in the same bed, but covered up tightly and not moving. Lao Niu said he was actually terrified,
but he couldn't hold it in. He missed my mom so much that after a few days he crawled over to her. At
first, my mom told him to go back to sleep, to come back to my side, but he wouldn't leave and insisted on talking to her. My
mom was driven crazy by him and had no choice but to respond with a few words, hoping he would finish talking and leave, but once he started
talking, he couldn't stop. They ended up falling asleep in each other's arms. The next night
, he crawled over again and talked to my mom. By then, my mom was much calmer, and he had started to talk more.
I had never heard him talk so much except when he was in my mom's bed. Although I couldn't understand what he was saying, later I
asked him if they had done anything that night. He said they were just talking nonsense, talking about family, about the countryside, and other things.
Because my mom had also lived in the countryside when she was little, she could talk about it. The two of them talked for three nights in total,
and only made love again on the fourth night.
When I woke up this time, they were talking. I was too lazy to listen to them and was about to go back to sleep
when I suddenly heard my mom's bed creak, followed by Lao Niu's rapid breathing. My heart skipped a beat,
I felt something was up, but I didn't dare to look yet. Then I heard the bed board creak and the blankets shake, and Lao Niu started calling
my mom's nickname again. I wanted to see how my mom would react, so I quietly lifted the corner of the curtain, closed one eye, and
looked over with one eye. I saw Lao Niu on top of my mom again, grabbing my mom's wrists and pressing them to the sides like last time, his mouth
constantly moving towards my mom's face, trying to kiss her. My mom kept turning her head back and forth to avoid him, struggling and whispering
impatiently, "You're doing it again, aren't you annoying? Stop it." Lao Niu, panting, said, "Juan, don't move, straighten up and
let me kiss you." He turned his head back and forth, following my mother's face, and finally managed to get her mouth. He immediately
pressed his lips against hers, kissing her loudly. My mother hummed softly through her nose, no longer resisting.
After kissing for a while, Lao Niu was done. He released my mother's mouth, and my mother, panting, said, "Are you trying to suffocate me?
I've let you kiss me, okay? Get off now." Lao Niu didn't say a word, still on top of my mother, and reached his hand under the covers.
My mother panicked and reached her hand in to stop him. The two of them struggled under the covers for a while. Suddenly, Lao Niu moved and
exhaled. My mother made a soft "hmm" sound, and then they both stopped moving. Lao Niu reached his hand
out from under the covers and started to take off my mother's thermal underwear. As mentioned before, my mother didn't like wearing a bra; she usually only wore a white tank top underneath.
This time, Lao Niu hadn't even had time to take off my mother's clothes before he inserted his hand inside her, and my mother's upper body was still covered. But Lao Niu, with
one hand, quickly rolled up my mother's shirt, including her undershirt and vest, under her armpits, exposing her
breasts. My mother didn't stop him at all while he was doing this; she lay there motionless. Only
when he placed his hand on her breasts and started moving his lower body did she pull her hand out from under the covers and symbolically
push his hand away. When he couldn't budge it, she stopped. After a few thrusts, my mother
probably couldn't take it anymore, so she covered her mouth with her hand, turning her face towards the wall. With Lao
Niu's movements, she kept moaning and groaning. Several times I felt like she wanted to scream but was afraid to, desperately
suppressing the sound. As Lao Niu moved, he lowered his head and kissed my mother's face, and my mother didn't avoid him anymore.
This time, Lao Niu lasted a little longer than last time. Near the end, he still did what he did last time...
He gripped my mother's breast tightly with one hand, his lower body thrusting violently, repeatedly calling out "Juanjuan, Juanjuan!" Finally
, his back arched, he froze, and let out a low growl as he ejaculated. Then he lay motionless on top of my mother.
After a while, he rolled off, pulled the blanket over both of them, and buried his head under the covers
to talk to my mother. This time, I couldn't hear a thing. So I lowered the curtain and went back to my pillow,
inadvertently finding myself hard again. Just as I was about to masturbate to release my pent-up energy, I heard my mother's
bed move slightly, followed by the sound of the blanket being pulled back. I froze, terrified. Then I heard Lao Niu's voice say, "Juan,
where are you going?" My mother replied impatiently, "Oh, I'm going to wash up," followed by the
sound of her putting on her shoes and getting out of bed. Lao Niu said, "Wash what? Come on up, it's cold outside." My mother became even more impatient, saying, "Shut your mouth! If you don't wash up and get pregnant,
will you raise the child?" Old Niu finally stopped talking. I risked lifting the curtain a little more and saw my mother
take the basin off the washbasin stand, pour some hot water into it from the thermos, and then scoop some cold water from the vat
and pour it in. She then squatted down and started washing herself with her hands. I didn't dare watch any longer, so I lowered the curtain and quietly
moved back. After a while, my mother finished washing, poured the water into the chamber pot, put the basin back, and then
I heard her taking off her shoes and getting into bed again. Although the two of them were still talking afterwards, I couldn't hear them anymore.
From that day on, Old Niu would climb over and do it every two or three days. At first, I would
wake up, but later I got used to the creaking of the bed and couldn't hear it anymore. I would sleep until dawn. This continued until winter vacation,
and they all thought I didn't know.
Soon after, winter vacation and the New Year came. After winter vacation and the start of the new semester, Old Niu stayed in our room for a few more days
before moving back to the boys' dormitory. Mainly because winter was over, and he was afraid people would say he was close to me and taking advantage of me. I had no idea whether they did anything
or not during that time. Then, just before May Day, the day before the holiday, my mom suddenly called me to
her dorm. I wasn't living in the same dorm as her anymore; I was living in the boys' dorm with Lao Niu.
It was noon when my mom called me over, and there were hardly any people on campus. She told me to sit down and said, "Mom wants to talk to you
about something, so keep your voice down." I said, "Okay." Then my mom asked me, "What do you think of Lao Niu?" I said, "He's pretty good."
My mom said, "Then I need to tell you something, don't be angry." I said, "What's there to be angry about?" My mom said, "Look, we've
been here for so long, and we're still unfamiliar with the place. Thanks to Lao Niu's help, I think he's
a pretty good kid. As for me, as a woman, there are some things I really can't do, and I can't rely on you." Old Niu has been so good to
us, always taking good care of us. Mom originally treated him like one of your own children, never
intending anything more than a romantic relationship with him. But these things are beyond our control, and Mom couldn't help it. I hope you can understand Mom; what's
done is done, and I hope you won't be angry. Then my mom asked me if I understood what she meant. Actually, I
understood what she meant from the beginning, so I said I knew, it's okay, Old Niu is my good brother,
I won't say anything if you're close to him.
Then what my mom said next shocked me. She said, "You don't understand, you didn't hear me. I'm telling you,
prepare yourself." Mom was pregnant. I couldn't help but gasp. Actually, thinking about it now, it
's not surprising at all. When my mom came, she never imagined she'd have a relationship with another man here. She
didn't take any precautions. There's a clinic in the village, but my mom was too afraid to go there to buy medicine or condoms, afraid of being recognized
. The town is dozens of miles away, and my mom couldn't walk that far, plus she
was too busy teaching to go. Lao Niu always went straight during sex, so my mom could only use washing to prevent pregnancy, which was
completely unreliable; getting pregnant was inevitable.
After I said "Ah," my mom said, "Don't say 'Ah,' listen to me." But I didn't listen to her at all. I
stupidly asked, "Lao Niu's?" My mom's face immediately fell, and she said, "Of course! Whose is it if not his
?" I said, "Then go get an abortion right away! Why are you telling me this? You have to tell him and have him go with you to get an abortion."
Then my mom said, "Don't worry about that. He knows. I told him. He already knows. Let me continue
. You can speak after I finish." Then my mom said, "I originally wanted to have an abortion, but I told Lao Niu first
. After all, you're carrying someone else's child; you should let people know beforehand. That's basic morality."
I said I understood. But Lao Niu didn't know what to do at first. When I said I wanted an abortion, he agreed.
I originally planned to have the abortion during the May Day holiday, but the day before yesterday, he changed his mind and wouldn't let me have it
anymore. He wanted me to give birth to his child. I told him it was impossible. I have a man and a child; how could I give birth to your child? Besides,
people would laugh at me for being so old. I'm not from this area, so it doesn't matter. You're young; you still need to get married.
You have to have some self-respect." Then he said he wouldn't get married; he only wanted me. He told me that
everyone knows his family's circumstances; there's no way any woman would want to be with him or marry him. He only asked me to be with
him, to give birth to the child, and to carry on his family line. Later, his pleading made my mom very worried. My mother
actually knew about his family's situation; there was no way any young woman would be willing to marry him. Seeing such a good
young man forced to remain a bachelor because of poverty, she couldn't bear it. Besides, she had seen many poor
bachelors in the village when she was young, and their lives were truly miserable. Thinking about it made her feel terrible. What he said made her feel sorry
for him too. The child in her womb was their family's only hope for carrying on the family line. If she aborted it, she didn't know
how heartbroken the child would be, perhaps even mentally ruined for life.
Then I asked my mother, "What do you want?" To be honest, I could hear my
voice trembling at that point, so I said it was a clever move. If my father hadn't been working on railway projects all year round, my
mother wouldn't have had the courage. My father only came home once or twice a year. After I asked my mother, she said, "
What's your thought? We'll keep the child for now." Mom calculated the time, and it's almost five months along now
. She's wearing loose clothes to cover herself up; I'm chubby anyway, so it won't be noticeable. After summer vacation, when
all the students go home, Mom plans to hold the wedding banquet with him. I immediately exclaimed, "Just have the baby, then!"
What kind of banquet? Are you worried people won't know? My mom said that since I'm having his child, there should be some kind of formal status, otherwise
what's the point? What am I? Anyway, we're not getting a marriage certificate, so a banquet is just a formality. I was really
dumbfounded this time. Seeing that I didn't say anything, my mom said, "Don't rush, this is my plan. But I need
your opinion first. If you don't agree, I don't care what he does, I'll get an abortion and never see him again
. I'm just waiting for your word. Think it over, don't rush." Actually, at that point, I already knew
I had no choice but to agree. The deed was done. My mom had thought it through so thoroughly, which meant she
had seriously considered it. So the next day, I told my mom I agreed. Then my mom told me
that they had discussed it, and if I agreed, she and Lao Niu would go to his house to meet his parents this May Day. When asked if I was going
, I said no. My mom left me some money to feed myself for the next few days, and then she dressed up
and went to meet Lao Niu's parents.
Actually, I had been to Lao Niu's house before. If I hadn't, I might have gone with him. But
I had been there, and I felt it wouldn't be worth it. Besides, his house was small and gloomy, and I wouldn't have anywhere to sleep, so I did
n't plan to go and spent three days at school alone. Then on the third day, my mom and Lao Niu came back, carrying
some things his mom had given them. They seemed quite happy. Anyway, my mom and Lao Niu's marriage was settled. With
two months left in the semester, my mom's belly started to swell rapidly. Summer clothes were thin, and even loose ones couldn't hide my mom's belly
and breasts; she looked five or six months pregnant. And when two people are together, no matter how much they try to hide it,
it's inevitable that some clues will show. Gradually, rumors about my mom and Lao Niu started circulating at school. At first,
it was only among the faculty and staff, but later it started circulating among the students as well. The boys were alright, but the girls, huddled together
, were incredibly gossipy. Sometimes, you'd accidentally catch a few girls secretly
laughing at me and Lao Niu.
Eventually, I got used to it, but the principal couldn't stand it anymore. My mom probably said
something to the principal, and he called a meeting with the staff, forbidding them from spreading these rumors. He mainly reasoned with them.
First, my mom wasn't a bad person; she did it out of sympathy for Lao
Niu. Everyone knew about Lao Niu's situation—if my mom didn't marry him, he wouldn't be able to find a wife. We'd all
lived here for years and should understand. He had some sympathy. Second, my mom was a
rare good teacher at the school, and there were several promising students in this graduating class. If this got
out and got me transferred, the entire class would be ruined. You know how rural schools are—the teaching conditions and teachers
aren't great, not many students can get into top schools, and finding a good teacher is very difficult. Thirdly, if this matter escalates too
much, parents in impoverished mountain villages are already reluctant to send their children to school
. If it becomes a major issue, they'll have even more reason to keep their children away. A high dropout rate would put the school behind in the county,
affecting funding allocations, policies, and even staff bonuses. So, keeping quiet and avoiding any disturbances
wasn't just for their sake, but also for the school's own. The principal then instructed the teachers to relay this message to the students
, especially since they wanted to go to school because it meant not having to do chores.
This last point was crucial; nobody wanted to be taken home by their parents to do chores. After the meeting, no one in the school,
whether students or staff, relayed these messages.
I mentioned our class monitor earlier. My mom had a severe reaction at that time, often running out
to vomit in class. Whenever she did, our class monitor would run out to help her. Considering how young we were,
she already knew how to take care of her. Later, the girls followed suit, and every time my mother vomited, two or three female class leaders
would follow her out. It was a coincidence that my father only came home for three days that summer and didn't have time to come over; my
mother just said she was tutoring the graduating class to cover it up.
After summer vacation started in July that year, my mother stayed at the principal's house, with the principal's wife looking after her. Then,
Lao Niu's family prepared for the wedding banquet. Later, on the 20th of the eighth lunar month that year, my mother left the principal's house.
The day before the wedding, all the girls in our class came over, plastering the principal's house with "double happiness" characters everywhere, and surrounding
my mother, asking her all sorts of questions and chatting. I felt embarrassed to stay inside with them, so the next morning, my mother, wearing
a red dress and a red veil, heavily pregnant, got into the bridal sedan chair hired by Lao Niu's family. Lao Niu's aunt came to fetch the bride
. Then, the principal's wife, being part of the bride's family, went with me to see her off. By the way, the reason for using a
sedan chair wasn't because of any retro or customary practice; it was mainly because the mountain roads were impassable by car. In our
area, outside the mountains, there were always convoys of cars, but here it was sedan chairs. I won't go into the specific procedures. When we arrived at their house, they set off
firecrackers and performed the wedding ceremony, setting out only four tables in total. After the ceremony and entering the bridal chamber, I slept at their neighbor's house .
Anyway, my mother was nine months pregnant at that time. It wasn't that they didn't want to get married sooner, but the date chosen by the fortune teller was
the only suitable one. The next morning, we said goodbye and left.
My mother and Lao Niu stayed at Lao Niu's house for a week before returning to school. They held another four-table banquet at the principal's house as a return
visit. Actually, Lao Niu's mother wanted my mother to stay at their house until she gave birth, but my mother's reasons were twofold: firstly
, she was currently teaching a graduating class, and secondly, staying at the school would be closer to the township health center, making childbirth more convenient than staying at their house
. Actually, this issue started causing some friction between my mother and mother-in-law. Later, on the day my mother was about to give birth,
she was still writing lesson plans the night before, and then she started having contractions in the middle of the night. She was taken to the township health center the next morning, and gave birth in less than half an hour.
While we were taking my mother to the health center, we asked one of Lao Niu's village children to run back and tell Lao Niu's mother the
news. Lao Niu's mother brought a can of chicken soup that afternoon, but when she heard it was a girl, her face fell, and she went straight
back without even entering the ward. Lao Niu and I then
comforted my mother, saying it was far away and her mother-in-law would come the next day. Fortunately, she came the next day, but the chicken soup was gone, so she brought some eggs and then routinely took care of my mother during her postpartum period. My mother
spent her postpartum period at the principal's wife's house, and only moved to the school dormitory after her postpartum period. Lao Niu's mother moved there too.
Lao Niu, who used to live with my mother, now went back to the boys' dormitory with me. My mother was 43 at the time.
Old Niu's mom was 41. Back then, some kids, being clueless, would sneak into my mom's dorm and peek through the window, but Old Niu's mom always
chased them away.
During winter break, my mom and I had to go back home, leaving the baby with my mother-in-law. The principal's wife
helped find a folk remedy for stopping lactation, and my mom took a few doses, afraid my dad would find out. But I think
my dad probably did notice something, though he didn't say anything, since having a baby
makes a noticeable difference in one's body. We managed to keep it from my dad after the New Year, and then winter break ended and school started again— my last semester with Old Niu; we were graduating from junior high. My mom 　　hadn't taught for
the second half of the previous semester because of childbirth, so she came back to teach the graduating class. On the first day of the new semester, the class monitor led the whole class in standing up 　　and applauding to welcome my mom. Because she had taken the medication to stop lactation, her milk supply had dried up, but otherwise, 　　teaching while breastfeeding would have been unbearable for her. Old Niu's mother never left. She only took him back for the Spring Festival, and then brought him 　　back again after school started, since the conditions here were better. That's when the truth came out. My dad suddenly came during the May Day holiday 　　and cornered my mom, Old Niu, the child, and his mother in the house. I had no idea. When I arrived, the principal 　　and his men had already dragged my dad out of the house. As he was being dragged out, my dad cursed my mom for being shameless, and when he saw 　　me, he accused me of being a traitor. He also cursed the principal and everyone at the school, dragging him out of the school grounds while cursing him. After that, 　　my mom didn't dare see him. I didn't dare go into the principal's office either. Only my dad, the principal, and a few teachers were in the principal 　　's office. I don't know what the principal said to him, but he managed to get rid of him. A few days later, my mom went back home 　　and told me that she and my dad had divorced. Except for a house in the county town in my mom's name, 　　everything else went to my dad, and I went to my mom. She said that because I was a traitor, my dad definitely didn't want me anymore. 　　After the divorce, my mom prioritized the graduating class. Our class ended up with three students getting into top provincial high schools, the 　　best result in history. I got into a regular high school, while Lao Niu didn't get into any. Since my mom was divorced, she 　　didn't go home much that summer. Lao Niu couldn't continue his studies and rented a place near the school. Someone in the village owned 　　a brick factory, and Lao Niu worked there. My mom moved out of the school dormitory to live with Lao Niu. That summer, 　　except for a trip back to the county town to prepare my high school things, I spent the rest of the time in the village with Lao Niu. The children 　　were sent to Lao Niu's mother's house. For a while, I called my mom "sister-in-law," and she scolded me. I said, "You're my brother 　　's woman, what else should I call you if not sister-in-law?" I didn't care what she said, I insisted on calling her that, which eventually angered her 　　, and she almost turned on me. Only then did I stop calling her that. 　　However, this kind of life didn't last long. I went home to see my mom during the National Day holiday in October when I was in high school. Actually, 　　it wasn't really a homecoming anymore, since my home was in the county town, and I was going to the village, which was my mom's home. Then, that bastard Lao Niu secretly 　　told me that he had gotten my mom pregnant again, a full year away from giving birth. I was furious and yelled at 　　him a few times. My mom stopped me from yelling, and I almost got into a fight with her too. Later, I gradually realized that 　　my mom was also angry with Lao Niu's mom. Lao Niu's mom was resentful that my mom hadn't given birth to a son. She was always acting like a mother-in-law to my mom 　　. She would mutter things like "If only I had a grandson," which made my mom decide that she could just 　　get pregnant again, since she figured raising one or two would be the same, and she was pretty much resigned to it. But at that time, it wasn't confirmed yet 　　; it was just a possibility that my mom was pregnant because her period hadn't come the previous month. Later, when I came back for the New Year, my 　　mom was confirmed to be pregnant. This time it was much easier than last time. The students at the school had all changed, and no one 　　was gossiping anymore. 　　Later, when I went back to see my mom after the second semester of my first year of high school, which was during the summer vacation of that year, 　　my mom gave birth again. This time it was a boy, and Lao Niu's mom finally shut up. I took care of her for 　　half a month during her postpartum period, and let me tell you, it was awful. I'll just briefly recount what happened after that. Anyway, this time we didn't 　　have to worry about my dad. My mom breastfed the baby until he was weaned. When the baby was weaned, my mom 　　's teaching term was over, and she found someone to transfer her back to the city, but not to the county's No. 1 high school anymore, but to the county's No. 2 high school. After that , 　　Lao Niu also came to the city with my mom. My mom taught, and he worked odd jobs everywhere, while his mother raised the child in the village 　　. Later, my mom felt that Lao Niu's work-study lifestyle wasn't sustainable, so she found someone to help him get into a vocational school so 　　he could go back to school. He got into a technical school and learned to be an electrician. My mom originally wanted him to go to the vocational education center in the city, 　　but Lao Niu's mom was afraid he wouldn't watch her and she'd run away, so she insisted on him attending the technical school in our county. 　　He insisted on coming home every night and didn't live on campus. Two years later, after graduating, Lao Niu was just the right age, so he and my mom 　　went to get their marriage certificate. My mom was officially married to Lao Niu. On the day they got the certificate, my mom invited a few relatives and friends 　　to sit together, and that was about it. Lao Niu worked in plumbing and electrical renovations, while my mom taught. Later, when 　　the two children were four or five years old, they were brought from their grandmother's house to attend kindergarten in the city. Now they're both in elementary school 　　. After graduating from university, I also returned to the county and worked at the county environmental protection bureau. However, I usually live in the bureau's dormitory 　　and only go home on weekends. After returning home, the two children call me "brother" and Lao Niu "dad." Sometimes I 　　jokingly call my mom "sister-in-law," and she doesn't seem too angry anymore. But I still prefer Lao Niu calling my mom 　　"Juan." My dad used to never call my mom by her nickname; when he needed to call her, he'd just say "Hey!" or "Hi!" 　　Now, every time I hear Lao Niu call my mom "Juan," I think of what happened that night 　　.

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