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【Filial piety】(6) 

    page views:1  Publication date:2023-03-24  
6.



A sleepless night, my mind a complete blank. I saw the first light of dawn in the east, but I didn't want to

get up . I didn't know what to do, or how to face the scene before me when I opened the door. I listened intently, but

there seemed to be no sound from my mother's side. I lay there like that, and time passed? I didn't even know. Suddenly,

it seemed like something came to mind. How could my mother survive if I left like that? Wasn't I supposed to be filial?

Wasn't my kind of "filial piety" pushing my mother to the brink of death? I jumped out of bed with a "whoosh," quickly

dressed, and ran to check on my mother!



I looked into my mother's bedroom through the half-open door and saw that everything was

exactly as it . The underwear I had thrown on the closet door was still hanging there, only my mother was covered with a thin blanket.



"Fifth son, the door has always been ajar for you," my mother said, pulling back

the covers as she heard me approach. "If you come back, I will warmly welcome your penetration. I no longer think about who I've wronged.

What my fifth son wants, I will give! I'm 80 years old, very old. What can I do if my son wants it? Why

won't I give it to him? I don't have many years left to live. As long as my son doesn't mind that my old flesh has lost its elasticity and that

there's no lubrication inside, come on, son!" My mother spoke with sorrow, yet with determination and resolve. But seeing

my mother's selfless devotion, my heart ached. She was willing to give her life to satisfy her son.



"No...no, Mom, get up. Let your son dress you; these are clothes I took off!



Mom, I didn't think it through. I misunderstood your loneliness. Now I know your loneliness stems from

a longing for your presence and the joy of family life, not...I was wrong to try to be filial with my body!

Mom, let me give you that family happiness again!"



The mother smiled, a bitter smile, but one that still brought her son comfort.



As I left the old house, I felt inexplicably sad. I noticed my eyes were red, unsure

if the gloomy weather was affecting my mood or if I was once again experiencing the depravity of my own heart.



The driver was waiting for me at the alley entrance (I wouldn't allow him to drive to the old house; few

people know I'm the chairman of a listed company), but I didn't go to him. I lingered at my own

doorstep, completely bewildered. A wave of guilt washed over me, and I felt utterly filthy in the sunlight.



"Chen Yang, how could you have such thoughts about your own mother? How will you face her in the future?"



An unseen undercurrent surged within me, sending chills down my spine.



"It's not that. When you're with your mother, you see her happiness. If she

really needs you, if she doesn't accept another man, would you abandon your filial piety for the sake of societal norms?"



I kept asking myself these questions, but I couldn't find the answer.



"Mr. Chen, you…" I happened to run into Yu Hua. She greeted me, but I was lost in my

thoughts and didn't answer.



Seeing that I didn't speak, she lowered her head and walked away. At that moment, I suddenly realized that I had offended someone again,

and this was the last person I wanted to offend.



"Hua'er, Hua'er, I'm sorry, I was thinking about something and didn't hear you call me!" I quickly chased after her and grabbed

her arm.



She shook off my hand. She wasn't angry, but she wouldn't let me touch her: "What are you thinking about

? You seem so distracted."



Her questions were always tinged with concern, perhaps unintentionally revealed, but she would never

come near me again.



"Flower, Flower, come with me!" I asked her to get in my car; we worked at the same company!



"Tch, I'll take the bus. I don't want to..." She left before finishing her sentence. She

was always like this in front of me, but thankfully I was used to it.



Yu Hua was gone, leaving me alone again. I wondered if I should go back to the old house that night.



Yu Hua was beautiful, like a June rose, dazzling yet thorny, while my mother, in my heart, was like a graceful

peony, magnanimous and tolerant. But I couldn't face her; remembering her wails, her sobs

, her forbearance, my heart pounded uncontrollably. Should I go back to the old house that night? I asked

myself again. I knew I couldn't face all of this, couldn't face the psychological shadow left by last night.



"To the airport!" I told the driver.



As I aimlessly boarded the plane about to take off, I realized it was bound for Kunming.



As I crouched under a tree in Cuihu Park, watching the seagulls flitting about, I felt a

mix of emotions. When the seagulls' red beaks swept past me, I seemed to see fiery red lips, but I

dared not think about it, dared not think about it, because those red lips seemed to carry the mellow aroma of red wine!



"Mom, don't run, don't fall! It's my fault, I shouldn't have said those awful things.

From now on you can do whatever you want, I won't do anything to Grandpa Liu..." Just then, an elderly woman with white hair

and a youthful face hurried past me, a young man chasing after her, still shouting something, but

I didn't hear him. My heart skipped a beat. What was she doing at home? She had been stripped

naked , her vagina had been penetrated by the tongue of her dearest relative, and her own son had his penis pressed against her vulva

. What would happen to her?



"Xiao Wu, Xiao Wu, you only think about your own inability to face it, you only care about your own feelings. Have you ever

thought about your own mother? It was you who imposed chaos on her, you who put pressure on her. Under those

circumstances resolutely rejected you. What did she do wrong? You ran away from home, would she still have the courage to face

everything today? If something really happened to her... Xiao Wu, you can't atone for your sins even if you die!"



I knew what I had to do. I had to go back, back to the old house, to be with my mother, to fulfill my filial duty to

her , in the way she wished. Thinking of this, I rushed to the airport...



The news broadcast on the living room TV hadn't finished yet. I knew everything was alright at home. Instantly,

tears welled up in my eyes, and the light in front of me blurred. A beautiful figure with long, snow-white hair stood silently in front of the sofa.

I couldn't see any life in her.



"Mom, why are you standing here? Why don't you sit down?" I hugged her from behind.



When I spoke, she trembled, as if she had returned from heaven to earth. Her body seemed to lose

all strength, and she collapsed into my arms.



"Wu'er," my mother turned around, hugged my neck, and began to sob.



"Mom, why are you so cold? You've been standing here all day?" I felt ashamed of my selfishness.



"Wu'er, tell Mom that nothing happened yesterday. Tell Mom that my Wu'er won't feel any pressure.

Tell Mom that Wu'er will always be by Mom's side. Wu'er, don't scare me anymore, okay? Mom has been worried

all day!" My mother said, raising her head to look at me with her blurry eyes, then closing them again.



It was another sunny day, and my mother was up early as usual, dressed smartly. She was busy in the kitchen,

preparing breakfast for her Wu'er. Seeing me get up, she greeted me politely, "You're up!" Her eyes darted around,

as if she was deliberately avoiding me.



"Mom, why are you dressed so formally? Are you going out?" I was a little puzzled, seeing my mother dressed formally while cooking, instead

of in her home clothes.



"Oh, no, I wanted you to get up, I wanted to show you a bright and cheerful me!" For the first time, my mother didn't

call me "Mom" in front of me, but used a pronoun instead.



Looking at my mother, I opened my mouth, not knowing what to say, so I kept quiet and went to the bathroom to

wash up .



I went to work, then returned to the old house…



The atmosphere at the old house was strange at night. My mother insisted on watching TV in the living room, but I could sense

she was distracted. Sometimes she would get up and walk between the living room and bedroom, then quickly sit down again, but she

still couldn't concentrate on the TV, no matter how captivating the plot was.



And to show that I had no reservations, I also insisted on sitting on the sofa in the living room,

staring intently at the screen, but I had absolutely no idea what was happening! Finally, my mother spoke, "Xiao Wu,

Mom's sleepy, I'm going to sleep! I can't lock my bedroom door!"



My mother's words made my head buzz, I almost fainted. I looked at my mother's back, not

understanding what she meant.



My mother went to sleep, and I quietly returned to my room!



And so, for the second and third days, we carefully avoided each other's eyes, avoiding

anything the other could sense.



On the evening of the fourth day, I returned to the old house as usual.



"You're back!" my mother greeted me, the first time she had done so in days.



"Yes! I'm back," I replied dryly, not daring to look at her face.



For some reason, in this sweltering summer heat, I felt a chill.



I went back to my room, took off the clothes I was wearing outside, and was about to change into my pajamas when

my mother rushed in from outside and hugged me tightly from behind, leaving me almost naked.



"Fifth son, fifth son, don't treat your mother like that. I can't take it anymore. I don't want to see you

looking so . Your place in my heart has really changed. I don't just feel that you're my son anymore,

I feel that you're a man, a man who desires me and whom I desire. The distance between you and me makes me feel

uncomfortable. I can't even act like a woman and be petulant in front of you. I... Waaah... I

... Fifth son, I don't know what's wrong with me. Can we go back to how things were before? I want to see you looking at me

with lust , to feel the longing in your eyes. I want to read

the desire you have for a woman in your eyes. I also want to be able to struggle with the difficult rejection again. I really don't want to be like this anymore

! I don't want to... I don't want to! Little Fifth."



I turned around and hugged her. "Mom, I can't stand the atmosphere at home these past few days either. I feel like I

can't breathe. If you hadn't rushed in today, maybe... maybe I really would have run into your

bedroom and... and..."



"Really? Son, really? Son! I've never longed for a man like this before!"



My mother said, and then she became as alluring as ever, speaking softly and shyly.



I lifted her chin, looking into her slightly reddened eyes.



"Kiss me, kiss me, son, kiss me!" My mother wrapped her arms around my neck, begging for a kiss

.



"Mmm... mmm..." I kissed her luscious red lips.



"Mom, you haven't thought it through yet!" As we separated, "I haven't thought it through either..."



"Mmm, Mom knows!" My mother blushed, looking at the prominent tent in my thin underwear.



"But, Feng Hua, if there's a next time, I won't let you off!"



"Mmm..." Hearing me say that, my mother suddenly slumped against the doorframe, "You brat...

I... I... know I... can't run away..."



"What did you say, Mom?" I was embarrassed by my tent, so I turned my back to

my mother, not hearing her little muttering behind me.



"No...no..." The mother staggered and ran quickly back to her room.

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