My brother-in-law and I slept together in the furniture store.

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I slept with my brother-in-law in the furniture store. Two years after my cousin and Xu Yang got married, their child was born, and I became a high school student. One summer vacation, I went to my aunt's house again. It was an extremely hot day, and my cousin took the child outside to cool off, leaving only Xu Yang and me inside. The fan was blowing hot air, making me inexplicably irritable, and I was doing my homework absentmindedly. I met Xu Yang when I accompanied my cousin on a blind date. He was my cousin's boyfriend, introduced to her by someone else. I was only 13 years old then, and perhaps already experiencing the first stirrings of love, I immediately fell for this tall and handsome boy. Later, he became my brother-in-law. For those few years, I would go to my aunt's house during winter and summer vacations, sometimes even staying there. I can't say whether it was because my cousin and Xu Yang continued to live at my aunt's house after their marriage, but in any case, being able to see Xu Yang often made me secretly happy. Not long after, Xu Yang quietly sat down beside me and began reading. The room was eerily quiet, save for the jarring sound of Jiang Wei's fan. A sudden flutter in my heart stirred. When I looked up, I met Xu Yang's focused gaze. My heart nearly leaped out of my chest. He quickly placed his hand on mine; it was burning hot. In a low, almost inaudible voice, he said, "Yu'er, I like you!" I was utterly flustered. Although I liked him, I never imagined he would confess so boldly! I didn't know what to do and ran away. The next day, when I saw him again, he seemed completely unaffected, which made me feel both relieved and lost. When no one was watching, his intense gaze filled me with a strange mix of panic and sweetness. To escape, I ignored my cousin's pleas and insisted on going home. Xu Yang was a very talented man. Unlike others who spent their spare time drinking or playing cards, he would always find a quiet corner to read or draw. From then on, whenever I met him, his gentle eyes would be fixed on me, focused and passionate, as if he had so much to say, and a hint of inexplicable melancholy. Although I left soon after, I often thought of him. Soon, I received letters from him one after another, titled "Valley of Love Flowers." His beautiful writing and fervent emotions were irresistible. Every day after school, I would see him standing far away by the grove, smiling at me. After a fierce internal struggle, I temporarily forgot he was my brother-in-law, ran over, and hugged Xu Yang tightly. Leaning against him, I let him gently lift my chin, his warm breath on my face making me tremble as I offered my lips—we kissed! From then on, the hillside and the grove became our secret rendezvous spots. I couldn't concentrate on my classes, only looking forward to school ending and seeing him as soon as possible. Finally, we tasted the forbidden fruit in his furniture store—I gave him my virginity completely. During that moment, my cousin's face flashed through my mind, but a trace of guilt quickly dissipated amidst the pain and pleasure Xu Yang brought me. In the instant we were together, I thought I wanted to marry him! The pleasure of the forbidden fruit made me unable to control myself. Xu Yang and I repeatedly sank into the sea of desire. As the college entrance exam approached, I became pregnant. Xu Yang was overjoyed when he found out and said he would divorce my cousin and marry me! I was extremely conflicted. I was afraid of hurting my cousin, but I also wanted to be with Xu Yang forever. What should I do? I am an only child, and my parents love me very much. My mother would definitely give me advice. What could I hide from my mother? Looking at my increasingly swollen belly, I made up my mind. To my surprise, my mother flew into a rage after hearing this, slapping me hard across the face and yelling that I was inhuman. Feeling wronged and ashamed, I burst into tears. My mother repeatedly said that no wonder my cousin's husband wanted a divorce; it was because of me! She said I had completely disgraced her! But they were still my parents. Despite her anger, seeing my unbearable pain, my mother's heart softened, and she said that as long as I had an abortion, she wouldn't pursue the matter further. But then Xu Yang came to my house. I truly admired his courage; he almost knelt before my parents, saying he loved me, wanted to marry me, and wanted me to give birth to the child! My furious father hit Xu Yang, drove him away, and immediately took me to the hospital for an abortion. The physical pain was bearable, but losing the child in my womb was unbearable. On the way home, through my tear-filled eyes, I saw Xu Yang standing far away—he too was in tears! After returning home, my freedom was restricted. My mother followed me closely, never leaving the house, making it absolutely impossible for me to see Xu Yang again. A little over a month later, another cousin from my aunt's side came to visit. With her back to me, she leaned against my mother's bedroom door and told her that she and Xu Yang had reconciled and that she was pregnant again. Looking back, I realize they deliberately told me this, but at the time, I was devastated. I fainted. When I woke up, I saw my mother's tearful eyes and her warm embrace. After that, I no longer resisted my family introducing me to potential boyfriends. A young man named Jiang Wei was fair-skinned and worked as a technician in a state-owned enterprise. Although he wasn't talkative, he was very honest and hardworking, winning my parents' favor. During the Spring Festival, his parents came to formally propose marriage. Ever since I learned that Xu Yang had moved back in with my cousin, I had been disheartened. Since Jiang Wei didn't offend me, I agreed to the marriage. My parents breathed a sigh of relief; I was their only child, and seeing their joyful faces made me feel deeply guilty for being so unfilial. Not long after the engagement, I became a primary school teacher under my parents' arrangement. Sometimes, when I saw Xu Yang on the street, I would ignore him like a stranger, my heart filled with resentment. During summer vacation, Jiang Wei and I held our wedding. This was only the third time I had seen Jiang Wei. He worked in Xuzhou, and he had taken leave to come to our hometown to get married. On my wedding day, my cousin didn't come; Xu Yang represented her. Xu Yang didn't speak to the relatives, just drank heavily, quickly becoming completely drunk. Jiang Wei was puzzled but didn't say anything. On our wedding night, I passively let Jiang Wei do as he pleased. When we were fully united, tears streamed uncontrollably down my face. I felt something inside me gently shatter—my youthful love! Because of the holiday, Jiang Wei was going back to Xuzhou soon. When he went to his aunt's house to say goodbye, I didn't go with him. As a result, perhaps out of revenge, my cousin told Jiang Wei everything about my relationship with Xu Yang. That day, after Jiang Wei returned, we had a huge fight. Seeing my parents' worried faces, I was filled with shame about my relationship with Xu Yang and, of course, I vehemently denied it. I thought to myself, since I married Jiang Wei, I should live well with him and not let my parents worry anymore. But Jiang Wei wouldn't let it go. He forced me onto the bed and brutally took me, constantly asking if I was a virgin! I was heartbroken. Is it wrong to love someone? If I backed out and let my cousin have her way, who will heal the wounds I've suffered? How can Jiang Wei and I spend our lives together? Due to immense psychological pressure, and also because Jiang Wei and I later had a son, I resigned from my job and moved to Xuzhou to reunite with Jiang Wei. The price I paid was that I changed my job from teacher to salesperson. After that, I completely lost contact with Xu Yang, only knowing that he went to Shandong to open a shop. But the shadow he cast on me deepened with the passage of time. Whenever Jiang Wei and I were intimate, as soon as I felt even a little aroused, he would loudly ask me whether he or Xu Yang was better. This made me feel utterly bored, and I just wanted him to finish quickly. Over the years, I've had the thought of divorcing Jiang Wei many times, but looking at my lovely son, I've dismissed the idea. A text message led to an inconvenient ending. My son grew up day by day, turning 12 in the blink of an eye. I've been in Xuzhou for 10 years now. Just when I thought the past was fading away, Xu Yang reappeared in my life. Three months ago, Jiang Wei told me when he came home for dinner that Xu Yang had called him, saying he was passing through Xuzhou on his way back to his hometown in Shandong and had intended to visit us, but time was too tight. He just wanted to call and say hello, leaving his phone number so we could keep in touch. Although I was a little excited, I could only pretend to be nonchalant. One late night, Jiang Wei was working the night shift when the phone suddenly rang. It was Xu Yang! He said he had specifically called me knowing Jiang Wei was on the night shift. That night, we cleared up a misunderstanding from over ten years ago, but what good did it do? Looking at my sleeping child beside me, I cruelly hung up on Xu Yang. Although I no longer contact Xu Yang, I can't forget him. I often get distracted at work, thinking about all the things we did together. I'm tormented by longing. When I can't bear it anymore, I send him messages, but then I think of my son and my family, and I delete each message just before sending it. However, I accidentally sent one message, and Xu Yang called immediately. We couldn't control ourselves anymore, and the love that had been suppressed in our hearts for so many years erupted like a volcano. This text message that I shouldn't have sent reignited the passion in my life. I love Xu Yang, and that hasn't changed all these years!

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