The Age of Technology (also known as The Desire Program)

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

(I)
Xiaolin's large hands gripped the woman's thighs tightly, like a pair of bear paws. Strands of her disheveled hair clung to her delicate face, her expression a mixture of pain and swaying in mid-air, struggling violently with each of Xiaolin's thrusts.
Xiaolin stopped, a satisfied smile appearing on his face. The woman's tightly closed eyes seemed to anticipate something. Regardless, her expression revealed unmistakable desire. She hugged Xiaolin tightly.
Xiaolin lifted the woman onto the table, his strong hands supporting her body, his ten fingers clearly digging deep into her soft skin.
It seemed her desire had been fully aroused. She eagerly pressed her lips to Xiaolin's, her tongue exploring his warm mouth. Xiaolin responded passionately. The woman slid down to Xiaolin's ear, then to his broad chest. Xiaolin closed his eyes slightly, letting the woman's tongue invade his mouth. From his expression, it was easy to see how much he enjoyed it.
The woman stopped moving, clearly waiting for Xiaolin's reaction.
Xiaolin laughed, laying the woman flat on the table and pushing her breasts towards him. After Xiaolin's squeezing, the two round mounds swelled, their slightly dark brown areolas becoming even firmer. Xiaolin bent down and kissed the protruding nipples; after a flurry of tongue movements, the woman's body displayed a wanton appearance. Her flushed face and disordered breathing filled the room with a burning heat.
The woman, smiling, reached towards Xiaolin's body, seemingly grasping something. Indeed: it was a man's penis, Xiaolin's thick, erect member. The woman smiled as she stroked it, and under her repeated kneading, Xiaolin's penis became unabashedly erect.
The woman looked at Xiaolin with pity.
"You're such an insatiable woman. Didn't we just finish?" Xiaolin asked.
The woman shook her head: "I don't think it's enough! You said you'd give me an orgasm. But I haven't felt anything yet! So you have an obligation to satisfy me."
"At least let me rest a bit!"
"You don't need to rest! Look at your thing, it's standing there stiff! That means you're still capable!"
Xiaolin's face was full of smiles, a smile brimming with pride. This made me, hiding to the side, gasp.
It seemed Xiaolin would do it with that woman again. My God! Xiaolin is practically Superman!
"Want to do it again?" Xiaolin asked.
The woman nodded vigorously: "Of course!" in a tone almost like a command.
Xiaolin shook his head dismissively: "I don't like your tone. Listen, I can satisfy you, but you have to beg me!" Xiaolin paused: "At least not in that tone."
The woman turned her head away dismissively. After a while, she looked at Xiaolin again.
"I don't care about you! I want it, I want it." After saying this, the woman actively offered her waist to Xiaolin's crotch.
"Ah!" the woman cried out in satisfaction, but Kobayashi immediately stopped her enjoyment. He held her body tightly, preventing her from wriggling.
However, Kobayashi didn't withdraw from her body; his thick penis remained inside her vagina, which was enough to drive her crazy. Her mouth circled Kobayashi, her breasts pressed against him, she convulsively rubbed his hair, and she whispered incessantly in his ear.
But Kobayashi remained unmoved. The woman tried to thrust into Kobayashi's body, seeking a sliver of pleasure from these brief encounters! But Kobayashi still stopped her.
The woman was already wet: her thick, dark forest had long since turned into a vast swamp. The woman was like a wanderer who had traveled for a long time in the desert, gazing up at the rain from heaven. She murmured to herself.
"What did you say?" Kobayashi shouted.
“Put it in,” the woman’s voice was as faint as a whisper, “Please, give it to me! I really can’t take it anymore.”
“Is that so?” Kobayashi stroked the woman’s hair, “So, are you obedient now?”
The woman nodded frantically. Kobayashi responded with satisfaction.
Kobayashi forcefully spread the woman’s legs, and the woman cooperated as best she could. She impatiently demanded that Kobayashi enter her immediately, and Kobayashi did as she asked.
“Oh…come on…conquer me.” The woman went wild with Kobayashi’s thrusting movements. Her ten fingers left streaks of blood on Kobayashi’s back. Kobayashi, with his heavy breathing, approached the woman’s “blooming flower,” attacking relentlessly. His bare back moved back and forth between the woman’s legs.
Kobayashi was like riding a horse, wielding his scepter to direct the woman’s body’s movements.
The woman had become a lump of mud, letting herself become a limp mess in extreme pleasure.
Kobayashi gripped the woman's thighs tightly, his movements becoming increasingly ferocious, pounding into her vulva like a wild beast. The woman's labia, undoubtedly experiencing intense pleasure from his repeated friction, were drenched in sweat, moaning softly as he welcomed Kobayashi's penis.
"Ah...right here...faster..." the woman gasped, "Deeper...I'm almost there...ah...again...I'm almost there..."
followed by a high-pitched scream, and the woman silently released her grip.
But Kobayashi's movements didn't stop; he maintained his heightened arousal, freely manipulating the woman's body. He withdrew his penis without a word, simply turning the woman around. He grabbed her crotch and pulled her towards him, causing her body to arch instantly.
Kobayashi re-entered her, exploring her vagina from behind. The woman began to moan softly.
Clearly, Kobayashi's actions had given her new sensations.
Kobayashi continued thrusting while playing with her drooping breasts. Under the influence of gravity, the woman's breasts appeared even more prominent and alluring. Kobayashi gripped them tightly, kneading them in rhythm with his movements.
The woman raised her head, letting out a series of moans. Their two naked bodies were already soaking wet, making it unclear whether the close union was due to sweat, as if their groin were glued together by perspiration.
The woman's expression was no longer one of initial excitement, but rather one of intense pain, or so I thought. I guessed the woman was about to succumb to Kobayashi's onslaught. At least an hour had passed since I inadvertently witnessed this, and Kobayashi seemed unsatisfied.
"Oh...oh..." Kobayashi murmured, his face contorted with a near-death expression, yet also seemingly intoxicated: "I'm coming! I'm coming." Kobayashi's expression began to contort, and his movements became increasingly violent.
After a while, Kobayashi stretched out his body, trembling uncontrollably. Finally, he collapsed weakly onto the woman.
The instant Xiaolin collapsed, I felt as if she glanced in my direction. Startled, I quickly left.
Back in the lab, I slumped weakly in my seat, the cold sweat sliding down my palms. I felt utterly exhausted, and my throat felt like it had a burning coal inside. Gradually, I felt a sticky, damp sensation between my legs.
I lowered my head, repenting for my actions. How could I have done that? A wave of guilt washed over me.
Even more shameful was that I had actually watched the entire scene of Xiaolin's affair outside his lab. I was utterly shameless.
After a period of self-reproach, my emotions calmed down, and my hands and feet stopped trembling. I let out a heavy sigh. I couldn't believe Xiaolin was telling the truth; he really dared to bring a woman to his lab! I was somewhat impressed. But wasn't this going too far? Although Lin's romantic relationships had always been quite chaotic.
After scolding Xiaolin, I felt much better. I wouldn't be like him! I'm a researcher.
I opened the document that had been delivered yesterday. The director said it was a diary written by a rapist, an important document for the research our center was conducting.
Back home, I couldn't wait to take out Xiaoyu's photo and put it on the newly bought scanner. Looking at Xiaoyu's radiant smile, I felt a sinful happiness, like placing a vulgar nude magazine in front of an innocent little girl.
A feeling of explosive desire surged within me.
Xiaoyu's naked image flashed repeatedly in my mind, imagining her expression as I entered her body—sometimes pain, sometimes pleasure. I could almost hear the moans escaping her lips…
"Swish…" I weakly closed Chen Yizhi's diary.
"That kid's a pervert!" Xiaolin handed me a cup of coffee from behind. I was startled; I hadn't expected him to be behind me, and even more surprised that he seemed completely unfazed. But since he was like this, I was happy to play dumb.
I didn't speak, just shook my head and smiled bitterly.
"This kind of person isn't worth all your effort studying," Xiaolin said decisively.
I took a sip of coffee, letting the slightly bitter black liquid flow on my tongue. The sheer bitterness was enough to suppress the turmoil in my mind caused by the diary entries.
I couldn't help but think of H, and the white dress that clung to her curves when she attended the seminar last night.
"That guy is a complete pervert!" Kobayashi said indignantly.
"Maybe," I said somewhat guiltily, "if you mean his rape of Yi Qingyu."
"Not entirely because of that." Kobayashi plopped down on my desk:
"These things happen all over the world. The number of people raped every year could circle the Earth seven and a half times! It's nothing special."
"You're exaggerating." I laughed.
"Raping someone isn't anything special." Kobayashi's tone was full of disdain.
"Hey, you don't sound like a psychological researcher at all!"
"That's not my profession." Kobayashi shrugged, looking indifferent:
"I'm criticizing him based on my personal experience."
This piqued my interest. “Tell me about it,” I said.
“Nothing much, I just think this guy is a loser, only able to find those unreal orgasms in his diary or on his computer, he’s completely impotent. A coward who only knows how to masturbate in the shadows, at least he did something decent in the end. Regardless of whether he was right or wrong, at least he took action, but what happened? It was the end of everything. What else is this guy if not a loser?” Kobayashi finished speaking in one breath.
“This should
n’t have anything to do with being a pervert!” “Twisting sex like this is definitely a pervert!” Kobayashi shook his right index finger: “This kind of simple desire is originally very beautiful, but he made it like this, dissecting sex into a condom, with no pleasure to speak of!”
“I think you’re really an animal.” I laughed. Thinking about what he had just done, my laughter became even more uncontrollable.
“I’ll take that as a compliment!” Xiaolin jumped off the table. “At least I’m honest and not pretentious.
In that respect, I quite admire myself.”
I took off my glasses and yawned. “Nonsense.” I paused. “Don’t make excuses for your promiscuity.”
“So what if I’m promiscuous! It’s not illegal. If you’re talking about morality, then please save your breath!
We all know what morality is…” Xiaolin’s tone was full of disdain.
“Besides,” he continued, “the women I slept with were all willing. I didn’t force anyone. I was openly pursuing them. Who can say I was wrong?”
“I don’t want to argue with you anymore.” I laughed and covered my ears. “To avoid being corrupted by you.”
“Xiao Mao, let me tell you,” Xiaolin’s tone suddenly became very serious. “Seeking sexual climax is not the same as indulgence, and indulgence is not necessarily sinful. Didn’t Confucius also say that he could do whatever he wanted without transgressing the rules?”
“Are you comparing yourself to Confucius?” I smiled somewhat maliciously.
“Say whatever you want, but…” He paused, “Who knows if Confucius thought about sex when he traveled around the states?” He then burst into laughter.
“Hey! You’re going too far!” I said irritably, “You’re even joking about Confucius!”
“Who’s joking with you? Isn’t this a great topic for a paper? Uh… let’s title it ‘Confucius’s Sexual Relationships During His Travels’.”
“Go to hell!” I grabbed the files on the table and threw them at Xiaolin.
“Okay, okay, I’m not talking to you anymore. I’m meeting up with a girl to see the night view.” Xiaolin’s eyes were almost closed from laughing, looking lewd.
“Get lost!” I quickly interjected, “So you don’t have to gossip over there.”
Xiaolin shook his head nonchalantly, “You can continue with your perverted case studies!”
Watching Xiaolin’s departing figure, I couldn’t help but smile bitterly. To be honest, listening to Xiaolin talk about sex was quite fascinating; I always started to get excited as I listened. That itchy feeling from my heart to my whole body was as if I also experienced some kind of pleasure. What's even more astonishing is that while listening to him recount these romantic escapades, I felt no guilt whatsoever; in fact, I even felt a sense of longing.
Perhaps, to some extent, Xiaolin had resolved his sexual desires.
Thinking about this made me a little resentful; I'm already twenty-five and still a virgin, even my palms are virgins.
After putting on the 3D imaging glasses, Xiaoyu's naked body transformed from a flat image into a real form. The T2 000 truly lives up to its reputation as Hangram's most technologically advanced product. This virtual reality system is currently the most popular of all similar products on the market. Through this device, you can truly exist in any era and personally experience all the experiences you desire. Just like in an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie from over a decade ago (I think it was called something like "The Devil" or "The Mobilizer," I can't quite remember), you can implant all sorts of memories into your brain at will.
I like this spirit; it saves a lot of processes, and of course, a lot of trouble. Like what I'm doing now, I can have sex with all sorts of women I like, but I don't need to pursue them or clean up the mess.
Several dialog boxes appeared on the computer screen, and I selected the normal mode; in the location selection box, I selected the room.
The scene before me quickly shifted to a room, where Xiaoyu lay reclining on a large round bed, the sheet covering her body. She looked incredibly alluring. I approached and slowly pulled the sheet down. Xiaoyu's face flushed crimson, her head bowed in silence. A hint of anticipation flickered in her lowered hair. I tossed the sheet to the floor, revealing Xiaoyu's beautiful body, like moonlight streaming into my vision. I took a deep breath, my head throbbing. I involuntarily closed my eyes, feeling a warm, damp sensation in my jeans.
Opening my eyes again, Xiaoyu's body, like a ripe cantaloupe, filled the room with a sweet aroma. I leaned down and kissed her cherry-like lips. My tongue eagerly pried open her tightly closed lips, a slippery sensation emanating from her tongue, like a powerful electric shock surging into my mouth. Every pore on my body opened eagerly, like a leech meeting blood.
Like a child greedily sucking on a cake, I frantically devoured the tempting cherry.
I was practically biting Xiaoyu's lips. In the intertwining of our tongues, I held Xiaoyu's tongue tightly, sinking into an unprecedented wave of pleasure. Ah! I wouldn't care if the world ended right then and there. In this dizzying moment, I felt a salty, metallic taste flowing against my own lips, swirling between my tongue and Xiaoyu's.
Blood! I was bleeding! Good heavens: Xiaoyu was so excited. I laughed, an abstract sweetness mingling with a slight, real pain, oscillating between my pain receptors and my erogenous zones. Perhaps I needed this slightly violent passion.
I excitedly bit down on Xiaoyu's lips. Xiaoyu gasped, bright red blood trickling from the corner of her mouth, mirroring her flushed face. Xiaoyu's eyes were tightly closed, her expression a mask of boundless pain; in her furrowed brows, I could understand the agony. But I noticed a satisfied curve at the corner of her mouth, an upward arc as if Xiaoyu were savoring some kind of dessert. A thirsty line traced between her lips, a yearning for desire. Bloody, absolutely primal, utterly worthless, only the union of two bodies could explain this yearning. I was extremely satisfied…
This guy really knows his stuff! I smiled and closed the diary. The coffee Xiaolin brought had gone cold.
But that was fine; unsweetened cold coffee was especially invigorating. I took out the microphone connected to the computer.
“November 26th.”
I cleared my throat slightly: “Chen Yizhi has a unique aesthetic system.”
I paused, suddenly unsure how to continue. I canceled the recording; this guy’s report was more troublesome than I had imagined.
However, I was quite satisfied with that last sentence. Chen Yizhi really does have his own aesthetic system; I’m very curious about that. Judging from his description of making love with Yi Qingyu in virtual reality, his thoughts were clear and organized, unlike some other sex maniacs who are filled with vulgar pleasures. I haven't seen any descriptions of organs in his writing; instead, I see his self-control. Even in such intense lust, he displays a kind of beauty, an appreciation for sex. I think Chen Yizhi's educational level must be quite high; someone who can use words to this extent must have a certain interest in literature.
Of course, this is purely speculation, and perhaps a very naive one. To prove my point, I found Chen Yizhi's file on the computer.
"Sure enough!" I was somewhat excited because the computer showed his educational background as a master's degree.
Of course, this isn't anything special; a master's degree simply proves he has received higher education. These days, you can't find a job without a master's degree or higher.
This reminded me of my father; perhaps his lament about his own unsatisfactory life has affected me! I still remember his disappointment. He often complained about why he hadn't pursued a master's degree, saying things like, "A college degree is useless." Actually, he wasn't wrong at all; his mistake was being born in the wrong era.
When I was in college, I read some old government education documents. Back then, a college student's status was somewhat similar to a PhD today—that is, in my father's time. Later, the Ministry of Education implemented a series of educational reforms, and academic qualifications skyrocketed like a blue-chip stock, making Taiwan one of the most educationally advanced places in the world.
Of course, the consequence was that master's degree holders were everywhere, unable to find jobs.
How strange! Why am I thinking about my father? I've rarely thought about him in the past ten years; I can barely remember what he looks like. But now I remember his appearance and voice so clearly, as if he gradually disappeared from my mind after he ran away with a prostitute when I was ten. At first, I hated him!
I hated him for abandoning me and my mother. But later, I couldn't even be bothered to hate him anymore. Because I simply couldn't hate someone without features (or rather, whose features were blurred). Now, I actually felt a little sorry for him, because even I wanted to run away from someone like my mother.
Why am I thinking about this! I shook my head and refocused my thoughts on Chen Yizhi. I had just thought of a question: why didn't this guy use a CD writing system, but instead used a rather outdated pen? This kind of tool from over a decade ago is almost never used except by a few artists.
Wow! Could it be that he really treats sex as art? Or is he just being unconventional? I've heard of "rebels" in sociological theory, referring to their antisocial values, but I'm not sure if I can categorize Chen Yizhi into that group.
This is a real challenge; I've never encountered a situation that makes me hesitate like this in all my research.
But I didn't feel angry at all; instead, I felt even more excited. I wonder if the feeling of intercourse can be generalized. If it could, I think I would be as excited as Xiaolin described right now.
I opened Chen Yizhi's diary and continued reading.
Finally! The thread finally opened! A soft, joyful moan escaped my lips. It brushed gently against my ear, echoing in the room—what a sensual sound! I love this kind of sound, a mixture of excitement and restraint, a longing that dares not be too explicit. It's captivating, like a traveler at a crossroads finally making a decision after much internal struggle. It's a catalyst! Without this heartfelt cry during sex, it's like watching a silent film—utterly devoid of stimulation!
Of course, this stimulation intensified my desire. My breathing became erratic. My desperately thirsty lips slid down Xiaoyu's neck, my right hand gripped her soft breasts tightly, and my body yearned to press against hers, as if every pore desperately wanted to touch her. I moved my body incessantly, trying to satisfy every part of my being. Xiaoyu's breathing became heavy, her hot breath forming a mesmerizing breeze around my ear, stirring desire deep within my bones.
My right hand gripped tighter, as if to test the softness of Xiaoyu's breasts, while my left hand slid towards the base of Xiaoyu's legs. Xiaoyu's body began to writhe violently.
"No..." Xiaoyu, who had been silent all along, finally spoke, "Don't touch... there." She said, grasping my left hand.
I naturally didn't listen to her, and her hand only held the back of my hand. Moreover, I felt this was a hint. My fingers began to slide into her thick forest, a tangling sensation spreading through my fingers. I don't know where the inspiration came from, but I decided to grab Xiaoyu's pubic hair.
"Senior, don't do this, ah... it hurts so much!" Xiaoyu's resistance began to intensify. I think my decision was correct; Xiaoyu's body understood and expressed this slightly painful feeling to my retina.
I ignored Xiaoyu's request, but moved my tongue from her neck to her breasts. I slid my tongue from her cleavage to her nipples. Xiaoyu's breasts were already full, her pink nipples erect. I began to play with her nipples, first gently touching them with my fingers, then gradually increasing the pressure. Xiaoyu was like a spring, her whole body swaying. I decided to apply pressure to her nipples, pinching them tightly with my fingers. Xiaoyu's moans exploded like bombs.
"Senior...! It hurts..." Xiaoyu's voice was broken: "It hurts!"
"Is that so?" I laughed, I can imagine how lewd I must have been.
"Then, how about this?" As soon as I finished speaking, I immediately took her nipple into my mouth. Xiaoyu arched her body, muffled groans bursting out as she arched.
I almost had an urge to bite her nipple off. At this moment, my left hand felt a little wet, and Xiaoyu's legs were trembling slightly.
I stopped all movement and looked up at Xiaoyu's frenzied state. Her face was flushed beyond belief with excessive excitement, which only made her more alluring, especially her face, which was covered in fragrant sweat, with strands of her disheveled hair sticking to it. Her beautiful long hair had spread out on the bedside table in a beautiful pattern, as if it were a totem of sex. Her firm breasts rose and fell with her heavy breathing.
She was so beautiful! Truly, a woman can only appear so beautiful and moving at this moment.
"What's wrong?" Xiaoyu noticed that I had stopped. "What happened?"
I didn't answer.
"Senior, are you angry!" Xiaoyu's tone was filled with fear. "Did I do something wrong?"
I smiled and shook my head. Xiaoyu's expression was almost crying.
It was too much to bear. I lowered my head and gave her a deep kiss. "I love you!"
I felt breathless, the hot breath from my nose filling my body like mist, a dryness in my throat like a sword about to split my head open.
I gulped down a large mouthful of cold coffee, the black bitterness and chill piercing my cerebral cortex like needles. I lifted my head and yawned heavily.
My thoughts drifted away from the events in Chen Yizhi's diary, leaving a strange emptiness. I lowered my head, trying to dispel this inexplicable emotion. But then I realized my hand was on my groin, and there was a warm, damp feeling inside my jeans.
Clearly, this was an impulse! Or rather, Chen Yizhi's diary had aroused it.
This was the last thing I wanted to admit: but this overwhelming, uncontrollable emotion honestly manifested itself in my body. I had to admit, I did have an urge for sex; the fuel of desire was burning brightly in my heart, my scalp was tingling—it was terrifying!
I stood up, forcing myself not to think about these things, but imagination is so frustrating. When you need it, it seems to disappear; but once you don't need it, it follows you like a shadow.
So the result was that my penis started to swell! A splitting sensation bulged from my jeans, and I couldn't control my fantasies anymore.
I let out a heavy breath, thinking I should have a way to deal with this. I went to the break room and decided to use ice water to solve my problem. If sexual desire is really a person, then water (especially ice-cold water) should be able to extinguish it. I knew how to use water to deal with my urges when I was ten years old.
My mom taught me that!
I remember it was probably the summer when I was ten, the weather was so hot that it was impossible to sleep. Although the air conditioning was on full blast, I still felt stuffy, so I found someone to sneak into the living room to watch TV. When I passed my dad's room, I suddenly heard some heavy breathing. Driven by curiosity, I secretly opened my dad's door, which wasn't closed properly.
I remember the scene through the crack in the door very clearly, because that image still appears in my dreams. I saw a woman straddling my father, the image like a frozen frame in a movie, except my father's face is always blurry. I think this is probably related to my memory system!
This man and woman (I'm increasingly unsure if that person was my father, the only certainty is that the room was indeed my father's) were connected, exuding a salty smell in that ripe season!
I was stunned, staring dumbfounded at the woman twisting her waist, staring blankly at the sweat all over her body, listening to their unrestrained shouts. Just then, I felt a hand tightly pressing down on my shoulder. I turned around and saw my mother's eyes practically spitting fire. Then my mother dragged me to the bathroom, and without a word, she turned on the cold water, grabbed the showerhead, and started spraying me.
I'm not sure what I felt at that moment, I was just terrified. But I remember my mom saying something like, "I'm going to wash away the impurities on you," while rinsing my body with water. Then she ordered me to keep rinsing until she came back, and then she left the bathroom.
I stayed under the showerhead, letting the cold water pour over me. Eventually, I couldn't stand it anymore and slipped out, but I didn't dare turn off the tap. I was afraid my mom would be angry, even though she already was. I just wanted to know what she was going to do; I had a feeling she might do something.
As soon as I stepped out of the bathroom, I heard screams coming from my dad's room. I rushed over and found my mom stabbing herself repeatedly in the thigh with a knife. But for some reason, my dad and the woman didn't react at all and continued what they were doing. I saw my mother bleeding profusely, the blood staining the floor. Finally, the woman on top of my father stopped moving, and strangely enough, my mother also stopped. Only then did my father stand up and walk towards my mother. I don't know what happened after that. I only remember that the last scene of the night was the woman closing the door and me being led back to my room.
Looking back now, it seems there was a tacit understanding among the three of them, as if they were all following some kind of rule. However, I was truly terrified, especially by that last scene: the spurting blood, my mother repeatedly stabbing herself in the thigh, the woman on top of my father, and her swaying hips.
After that, whenever I had any thoughts about sex, I would habitually take a cold shower. Of course, these two actions didn't always coordinate perfectly, because sexual urges can happen anytime, but you can't always find a bathroom to shower! But later I discovered that drinking ice water had the same effect, and my problem was fundamentally solved.
I poured myself a large glass of ice water and gulped it down. The fire in my heart, as usual, gradually subsided.
I felt dizzy, a hollowed-out feeling making me feel lightheaded, but that lightness was clearly tinged with helplessness, or perhaps a little confusion. I'm not good at describing that feeling; the only certainty was that I was exhausted.
I leaned weakly against the cold water dispenser. The steel's chilling texture penetrated my shirt fibers, forcefully stripping my skin of all sensation, swiftly and mercilessly purging the heat from my pores, while simultaneously depriving me of all other senses. I felt my elbows gradually go numb, a numbness that slowly spread throughout my chest like a organism multiplying. From a biological or physiological point of view, this is a very dangerous situation, because the body's nervous system, when prolonged immersion in a certain state, loses its ability to connect with the outside world.
However, I found a force seeping into my body, the fatigue gradually disappeared, and my thoughts began to clear. I slowly straightened up and stretched vigorously.
I wasn't proud of this self-control, because I could always control myself; back in high school, I was even called a saint! Of course, I understood that this was mockery, even an attack. Sometimes I suspected that this nickname was almost equivalent to eunuch, which was truly troubling. I
don't know why I always habitually suppress my feelings; suppression and sex almost appear simultaneously and are absolutely separate, like a kind of constraint signal. But I dared not delve into what lies behind this constraint, what exactly is going on.
Why does this constraint reaction occur?
"Chen Gucheng on the phone! Chen Gucheng on the phone!"
It was the voice of a computer-generated switchboard operator. This computer-synthesized female voice echoed in the silent hall, giving off a chilling feeling.
I picked up the phone from the wall.
"Hey! Xiao Mao, wow! You're still here!" It was Xiao Lin. Judging from the noisy background on the other end of the line, this guy was probably at a bar trying to win over Mei Mei!
"Yeah! I'm not as lucky as you, getting to enjoy yourself with a prostitute."
"Don't be so sour! I'm here to rescue you!"
"Rescue me?" I was a little confused. "Rescue me from what?"
"Rescue you from that pervert's diary!"
"Sigh!" I sighed. "You might be disappointed. I haven't finished reading his diary yet."
"Xiao Mao, don't be so stubborn! People need some leisure time besides work!"
"That's my work ethic. You know I don't like to drag things out."
"I know," Xiao Lin said, seemingly laughing. "You always want to be a model student!"
"I never wanted that title." I was a little angry. "I'm just doing what I'm supposed to do."
"Don't be like that." Xiao Lin probably sensed my displeasure. "You know I didn't mean any harm."
"I know." I laughed. "It's just that I really can't get away."
"Big brother! It's already past nine o'clock. You should rest too!"
"I don't want to be a third wheel." I thought that was a good enough reason!
"If that's what you're worried about, then don't worry, my girl's long gone!" Xiao Lin sounded a bit smug; it seemed he'd probably "gotten" her.
But strangely, I felt a chill when Xiao Lin said that.
"Hey! Hey! Are you still listening?" Xiao Lin's voice rang urgently through the receiver.
"I am listening!"
"I'm serious! Don't always bury yourself in work; sometimes you need to let loose! Life has many facets; don't lock yourself in an ivory tower. I remember Professor Wang telling us that as social researchers, we should actively engage with people, right?"
Xiao Cai's words were quite convincing; letting myself have a drink probably wouldn't hurt!
"Besides..." came another voice from the receiver: "We haven't had a proper chat in ages; just give me the honor!"
I saw I had no reason to refuse, so after asking Xiao Lin for the meeting place, I quickly packed up and left the research lab.
Before leaving, I made sure to lock Chen Yizhi's diary in my personal drawer. It's a very important document to me, and I didn't want to lose it.
The hotel Xiaolin mentioned was on Xinzhongxiao East Road. Although it was on a main street, it still took me some time to find it. Honestly, if Xiaolin hadn't been so certain about its existence, I wouldn't have believed it.
"This place is really inconspicuous!" I exclaimed as soon as I found Xiaolin. "It took me quite a while just to find this place!"
Xiaolin laughed. "This place only serves regular customers; they don't usually advertise."
"No wonder! When I saw the storefront, I thought it was a construction site!" I pointed to the whiskey in the bartender's glass.
"It's not that dramatic!" Xiaolin picked up his glass and downed the whiskey in one gulp.
“However, you’re right about some things.” Kobayashi wiped the remaining wine from his lips. “This place does have that abandoned feeling, like a construction site.”
“Then why don’t you just go drink in the ruins?” I laughed.
Kobayashi shook his head. “It’s different.” He said, “The atmosphere here is more like a ruin than a ruin itself. I like this desolate feeling in a bustling city.”
I was a little surprised! This wasn’t like the Kobayashi who usually flirted with his research assistants in the lab. The affair Kobayashi had with that unknown woman this evening was now resurfacing.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” Kobayashi probably noticed my reaction.
“Nothing, I just think your behavior right now is a little different from usual.”
“Really?” Kobayashi chuckled dryly. “People have many sides.”
“Oh yeah! Then I hope you show this side of yourself more often when you’re doing research.” I took the drink the bartender handed me.
“You son of a bitch!” Kobayashi raised his hand and gestured towards the empty glass on the table.
“I call it being relaxed at work and serious at leisure!” Kobayashi said.
"Leisure and seriousness seem like opposites, don't they?" I asked.
"Silly, sometimes you have to think about things from a different perspective to understand the fun in life." Kobayashi picked up the bartender's freshly poured drink: "Enough talk, let's drink!"
"Whatever, it's your freedom, but your work tomorrow..."
"You don't need to worry about my work. When have I ever messed up?" Kobayashi's tone was full of confidence, but he really had never messed up. I guess that's what you call a genius!
"What time is it now?" Kobayashi asked.
"Don't you have a watch? You know I never wear one."
"Then what time is it?"
"I don't know." I answered blankly. "But I can ask someone else." I quickly added. "
Never mind, what good does knowing the time do? Let's drink!" Kobayashi raised his glass: "I'll toast you."
I smiled and raised my glass: "Don't drink it all! Just relax." Kobayashi nodded.
"Let's talk about that weirdo of yours!" Kobayashi put down his glass and asked with a smile.
"I don't know why, but I always feel like he's not like what you described." I still couldn't agree with Xiaolin's opinion of Chen Yizhi.
"Really?" Xiaolin took a sip of his drink. "Why?"
"I don't know!" I shrugged. "I just feel like he's a very simple guy."
"If that's not called a pervert, then what is?" Xiaolin pushed up his glasses. "The simpler a person is, the more troublesome they are, isn't that right?"
“I think this is a sampling problem,” I said.
“Do you like to define everything so precisely?” Xiaolin said, bringing his face closer. I felt he was challenging me.
I was a little angry. Although Xiaolin was my classmate and good friend, he was still teasing me.
“Do you like to categorize everything arbitrarily?” I retorted.
Xiaolin didn’t back down as I expected. Instead, he brought his face even closer, and I could smell the alcohol emanating from his nose.
“You’re angry!” Xiaolin said with a smile. I have to admit his smile made me very uncomfortable.
“Right? You’re angry,” he repeated, and at the same time, I felt his hand on my thigh. I immediately pushed his hand away and pushed him away.
“What are you doing?” My anger was filled with repulsion and fury because I felt like Xiaolin was seducing me.
"I didn't do anything: would I do anything to you?" Xiaolin laughed loudly.
"But your reaction is quite funny, like those women who desperately tried to protect their chastity back then. I'm thinking of giving you a memorial arch."
"You think it's funny, don't you?" I suppressed my anger. "You bastard!"
"Okay, okay, don't be angry! It was just a joke, why take it so seriously!" Xiaolin said, but I didn't think it was an apology; I felt it was just an excuse.
"Okay! I was wrong, okay? Don't hold it against me! We've been friends for so long." Xiaolin seemed a little nervous as he said this.
"I won't hold it against you," I said coldly. "But there's a limit to jokes. You son of a bitch, if you don't understand the consequences of jokes, you'll pay the price someday." I said all this in one breath, and Xiaolin, like a schoolchild who had made a mistake, lowered his head and let the teacher scold him.
"Alright, you've said enough!" As soon as I finished speaking, Kobayashi chimed in, "Come on, let's drink and dissolve this unpleasantness in the alcohol!" He raised his glass. What
could I say then? I raised my glass in return. A man should have some magnanimity, especially with his friend.
"However!" Kobayashi said after finishing his drink, "I feel that your reaction just now seemed to carry more fear than anger. Am I wrong?" Kobayashi looked at me meaningfully.
I didn't answer immediately because I needed to think. Maybe Kobayashi was right; I was afraid. Maybe I was afraid of the feeling of being gay! Ever since I learned that humans are born with bisexual tendencies, I've been worried about becoming gay. No matter how progressive the times become, no matter how accepting society is of homosexuality, I just can't accept the image of two men (especially men) having sex. I can't imagine what it would be like for two penises to kill each other.
“Forget it, don’t take it so seriously. I don’t necessarily need your answer,” Xiaolin said, which helped me out of the awkward situation. I really didn’t want to answer his question.
“I think I should talk to Chen Yizhi,” I tried to change the subject.
“Is it necessary?” Xiaolin looked a little puzzled.
“Of course,” I said, “it might help my research.”
“That would certainly be better, but…” Xiaolin suddenly stopped.
“But what?”
“I’m afraid you’ll be influenced,” Xiaolin said.
“Don’t worry, my stance will be very objective,” I said with a smile.
“That’s good. After all, we’re researchers, not judges.”
“I know,” I said, raising my glass.
When I got home, it was already past 1 a.m. After drinking some alcohol, I couldn’t sleep. I turned on the TV and randomly flipped through channels. Finally, my eyes landed on the news channel.
It was another news report about a woman being raped and murdered. This was the sixth case this month.
"This is the sixth rape-murder case this month. Mayor Chen Huoyuan expressed serious concern about the case and ordered Police Chief Hu Zhixiang to solve it within a specified time..." The female anchor on the screen said solemnly.
In the upper right corner of the screen was a photo of the victim before her death, a delicate face unaware of the dangers of the world, and below it was a series of chilling headlines: Night Wolves Rampage, Women Terrified. Such a document was truly shocking!
"It is understood that the deceased had gone out with a man surnamed Lin before her death. The police hope that the man can come forward to explain the case..."
The man surnamed Lin: I don't know why, but I immediately thought of Xiao Lin. But Xiao Lin wouldn't cause himself such trouble, would he? I laughed. It was just a coincidence, and I actually took it seriously! Really.
(II)
Lying in bed, I couldn't help but think of Chen Yizhi's diary. Including his case, there have been seven rape-murder cases in Taipei this month. It's really terrible! The streets have simply become a battlefield of lust. Such a life can sometimes be depressing! It was like a giant black hole; once everyone was sucked in, they could never get out.
Perhaps it was the influence of the news, but I woke up this morning feeling like I hadn't slept well. I was sure I was dreaming, and probably a nightmare!
Dragging my tired heart, I arrived at the research lab. From the moment I entered, I felt an eerie atmosphere. Everyone who greeted me looked at me with unprecedented eyes, as if I had done something wrong.
Opening the door to my private research lab, I found two people inside. They immediately stood up when they saw me enter.
One of the men took out some kind of identification: "Hello, Mr. Chen, we are detectives from the Criminal Investigation Bureau. My surname is Zhou, and this is my identification."
I nodded nervously, never expecting to deal with the police. Mr. Zhou continued, "This is my colleague." He gestured to the woman beside him.
"Hello, Mr. Chen, my surname is Wu," the woman quickly replied, her face carrying an indifferent air, as if she were on guard against something.
"Please sit down," I said, trying to calm myself down, pondering why the police had come to my door.
After I sat down, the detective surnamed Zhou spoke first: "Mr. Chen, don't be so nervous. We're not here to see you because you've committed any crime, but to ask you some questions."
His words put me at ease, and I smiled: "How can I help you?"
"Well, we want to know where you were between 9:00 and 9:30 last night?" This time it was Ms. Wu who spoke.
"Last night? I was drinking with a friend at a pub!" I was a little confused by the question.
"What's your friend's name?" she pressed.
"His name is Lin Yuxiang."
The two detectives exchanged a glance, their expressions somewhat dejected.
"Mr. Chen, thank you for your cooperation. We have no other questions." Detective Zhou said this with a forced smile.
"If possible, could you please tell me what happened?" I couldn't stand this unexplained conversation and desperately wanted to know what was going on!
“Well, Mr. Chen, you must have seen the news!” the detective surnamed Zhou asked. I nodded quickly.
“Then you must know that another woman was raped and murdered last night,” he said.
I thought I roughly knew what had happened.
“We discovered that the victim was with a man named Lin Yuxiang in the hours before her death.”
“So you naturally suspect that Lin Yuxiang might be involved in this case,” I continued.
Detective Zhou laughed: “As expected, you’re a psychology expert. But, to be honest, we don’t just think Lin Yuxiang is involved in this case, we suspect he is the murderer!”
“I think this must be what you call intuition!” I said with a smile, “But unfortunately! My friend has an alibi.”
“That’s why we came to see you,” he said.
“Then is your intuition wrong?” I said, deliberately emphasizing my disdain.
“That’s hard to say.” He probably didn’t sense the unfriendly tone in my voice. “But the law is based on evidence, and our experience as police officers can’t be used as evidence in court.”
I nodded. Actually, this guy was pretty cool! “Where is my friend now?” I asked.
“At the police station! But don’t worry, we’ve followed all the procedures and haven’t violated his rights in any way.” He explained slowly and methodically.
“When can he be released?” I asked.
“We’ll release him as soon as we get back.” He let out a heavy sigh. “If there are no other questions, we’ll take our leave.”
“Take care.” After saying that, I saw them out of my lab.
After closing the door, I couldn’t help but laugh. I never thought Kobayashi would be so unlucky! This really proves the saying, “If you walk the night road too often, you’ll eventually run into a ghost.”
After they left, all my colleagues rushed into my lab, and after a flurry of questions, they finally left with satisfied expressions. Honestly, I didn't really believe these people's feigned concern; I thought they were more curious or even gloating.
After finally getting rid of them, I started thinking about how I'd tease Xiaolin when he got back.
Half an hour later, cheers erupted outside. I figured Xiaolin was back. I put down my work and waited patiently for him to thank me. A moment later,
he pushed open my door, waving to the people outside: "Thank you everyone, thank you for your concern, thank you!" He then closed the door.
"My god! I didn't expect these people to be even harder to deal with than the police!" He loosened his tie, looking like he couldn't handle it.
"I think the only person who can be so smug after being arrested by the police is you!" I shook my head and said, "You seem to find all this very interesting."
"Of course!" Xiaolin spread his hands: "This is a rare experience."
"Really? I should have told the police I didn't even see you yesterday! Let's see if you'd still be so cocky then!"
I said threateningly.
“You’re not the kind of person who would betray their friends,” Xiaolin laughed heartily. “Besides, you’re not good at lying, so you would never do something that would betray your friends and go against your conscience.”
“Is that a compliment?”
“Of course!” Xiaolin’s expression was sincere.
I shook my head noncommittally.
Xiaolin tilted his head, scrutinizing me. “You don’t seem very happy that I was released?”
“I just feel regret!” I said.
“Regret!” Xiaolin shouted. “What are you regretting?”
“I thought I’d see some disheveled guy sighing and complaining over there,” I tried to sound mournful. “I never expected you to return like a hero.”
“Haha! I thought you were used to this!” Xiaolin said this with a smile that made you want to punch him; I hadn’t expected his retort to be so vicious.
“Okay! I was just kidding,” Xiaolin quickly added.
“I know you’re joking,” I said with a laugh. “But I still really want to punch you!”
We both burst into laughter, and as soon as the laughter subsided, Xiaolin added a sigh. “What’s wrong?” I asked.
"It's nothing!" Xiaolin rubbed his face. "Human fate is truly unpredictable!"
"Are you feeling sorry for that woman?" I asked, somewhat surprised.
"What kind of tone is that? It's like I'm just a person with sex but no feelings." Xiaolin's voice was a little agitated. "Even though it was just a one-night stand, life is life! I, Lin Yuxiang, am still a living, breathing person with blood and tears!"
"Sorry? I didn't mean any harm, just like you always say, it was just a joke!" I quickly explained.
"I know!" Xiaolin's tone softened. "Actually, it's not wrong for you to think that way, since I always act like I'm playing the field. But, I really feel sorry for that woman!"
"No one can know their next fate, that's just how life is!" I tried to comfort Xiaolin's current emotions. However, as soon as the words left my mouth, I felt that my words of comfort were clumsy.
After listening, Xiaolin smiled and said, "What you said was rather vague, but it's still pretty good. Thanks!"
This guy is quite considerate! I felt encouraged and continued, "After this lesson, don't complicate relationships like this next time!"
"Don't get me wrong! Being sad is one thing, but love still needs to be made. The relationship between sex and emotions isn't always linear." Xiaolin's answer surprised me.
"I thought you..." I stammered.
"I'll repeat myself! For me, sex is a part of life. It's independent of my emotions, so being sad is okay, and so is making love." Xiaolin said seriously.
"So you'll definitely fall for a woman someday!" I said irritably.
"If that's the case, then it's my destiny." Xiaolin looked ready to accept defeat, but I really wanted to punch him.
“Go to hell! I thought you'd be more restrained after being arrested by the police, but you're still as lewd as ever!
Honestly.”
“Then I'll make you even angrier. The night I was detained by the police, I rode a policewoman to mourn the dead!” Kobayashi said, lighting a cigarette.
I stared wide-eyed: “You slept with a policewoman?”
“Yeah! I was suspicious! You don't know how lewd policewomen are after they take off their uniforms. Wow! It was one of the few experiences I really enjoyed.” Kobayashi's expression was full of longing.
“Are you serious or not? You're suspected of being involved in a murder case!” I said, somewhat incredulously.
“But I’m innocent! That policewoman must know that too. You know what? That policewoman was absolutely gorgeous, her figure and face were flawless. When I lifted her uniform skirt, I felt an unprecedented excitement. Few people have ever slept with a policewoman on duty! Ha, ha, it was fucking amazing.”
Kobayashi was lost in his fantasies, while I felt an unbearable heat, sweat blatantly dripping from my forehead.
“Anyway, you have to experience it for yourself to know. I can’t explain it to you anyway!” Kobayashi concluded. “Alright, I won’t bother you anymore! We’ll talk again later!” After saying that, he left my lab.
I waited until he closed the door before daring to wipe the sweat from my forehead. After letting out a heavy sigh, I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes.
My lower body swelled uncontrollably, pressing tightly against my suit pants! I felt a force surging within me, and looking up, I seemed to see a beautiful policewoman falling from the ceiling.
I shook my head, trying to ignore the stimulation Xiaolin had just described. I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath, but when I opened them, the policewoman was there again.
All the buttons on her uniform were undone, leaving only a slit, through which her alluring body was vaguely visible. Her narrow skirt accentuated her seductive curves.
"You bastard!" I yelled. Honestly, I hadn't even finished my research, and my head was already full of lust! What a useless guy, I smacked my head.
I took out Chen Yizhi's diary, but my actions were limited to simply opening it, because the policewoman was back in front of me.
I pulled her to the iron bars, lifted her thighs, and inserted my penis into her. With each thrust of my hips, the iron bars creaked in response. The creaking sounds and the policewoman's heavy breathing were like a harmonious duet between a piano and a violin, filling the small cell with various violent impacts.
The policewoman gripped the iron bars behind her tightly, her buttocks sinking into them; the coldness behind her must have been a different kind of stimulation for her! The tight skirt I had lifted was generating static electricity from the constant friction, making a "beep beep"
sound. She was practically letting herself go, a complete mess of pleasure. I kept thrusting my hips, wanting to get closer to heaven.
Finally, an unprecedented spasm, from my penis to my calves, came, and slowly the policewoman slid from the cold iron bars to the floor, finally disappearing from my sight.
When I came to my senses, I felt an incredible warmth inside my suit pants, but after this warmth came a cold, damp feeling and regret.
I felt a powerless exhaustion, and behind this exhaustion surged an even larger, more piercing sense of guilt.
But strangely, this guilt always seems to appear only afterward; why doesn't it appear to stop my actions and cut off my imagination when I'm fantasizing? Why does it always torment and blame me only after the pleasure has ended? I
don't know why, but I increasingly feel that this is all a deception, just like Chen Yizhi using virtual reality to satisfy himself. I suddenly realized that this means Chen Yizhi and I are the same kind of people!
I can't think like this anymore! I'm turning my whole life upside down! I'll break down if this continues.
I stood up, opened the window to let in the fresh air and dispel the sweltering heat in the room, and only then did I realize my inner need for sex! Maybe I really should try experiencing intercourse.
However, this thought vanished in an instant. With the cool breeze from the window, my emotions calmed down a lot. I left my study and headed towards the break room. For me, a glass of cold water is the best friend.
Back in the lab, Xiaolin and H both came to see me at the same time. These two never got along.
"Hey, Gu Cheng," H called out, "The director wants to see you!"
"Me!" I said nervously. "Do you know what it's about?"
"It seems he wants to ask about the progress of your report, the one about Chen Yizhi," H said.
"He cares so much about that report!" I was a little flattered.
"Don't be silly," Xiaolin immediately poured cold water on me. "That guy surnamed Yang doesn't care about your life or death. He cares about his research results and academic standing. If your Chen Yizhi case wasn't part of his overall research plan, he wouldn't bother with you."
"That's true," I sighed, looking down.
"Did he say anything else?" I asked.
"No, he just told you to go see him quickly, that's all!" H said casually.
"Okay, I understand. I'll organize the data and go see him later, thanks!"
H smiled and nodded before leaving my room.
"Tch!" Xiaolin spat out his disdain. "Damn it, that pretty-boy prostitute!"
"Hey! Don't talk about her like that, it's awful." I waved my hand to stop Xiaolin's displeasure.
"What's so awful about it? It's just the truth. If H weren't so pretty, she wouldn't be the head of the research lab." Xiaolin maintained his disdainful tone.
"She's a mid-level PhD, she's qualified to be the head of the research lab," I defended H.
"You're also a mid-level PhD! Why aren't you the head of the research lab? Why are you always stuck as the chief assistant in the case study lab?" Xiaolin was somewhat indignant on my behalf, but his words hit a nerve.
Two months ago, after the original head of the research lab, Lao Ma, immigrated to Canada, everyone thought I could smoothly take over the position. To be honest, even I thought so, because I was already the chief assistant, and I'd been here for five years. In terms of qualifications and knowledge, I should have been perfectly qualified to be the head of the research and development team. However, when the selection was announced, it turned out to be H, a newcomer who was still just a regular researcher at the time. This shocked everyone and, of course, deeply hurt me.
To be honest, I was really indignant at the time! Because no matter how many times it was decided, it shouldn't have been H's turn. I felt like I had been defeated by an outsider. I still remember how Xiaolin was indignant and wanted to confront Director Yang, but when I stopped her, she cursed me for being cowardly. I don't think I was cowardly; I just didn't want to make a scene, and besides, it would have been too ungentlemanly.
"H actually performed quite well," I said. This was truly the truth, although at first I did feel very uncomfortable, and sometimes I even hoped that H would cause some trouble to show everyone her incompetence. But now, I genuinely praised H's performance.
"Perhaps Director Yang had already realized that H was more suitable than me for the position of head of the research and development team," I said.
"Nonsense!" Xiao Lin scoffed even more. "That guy surnamed Yang can only tell if H is suitable for this job from what he sees in bed."
"Don't say that! It's shameless."
"His affair with H is an open secret, what's shameful about it?" Xiao Lin said.
"I can't be bothered with you anymore. I need to organize the materials for Director Liang's report later, I'm not going to talk nonsense with you."
I gave him the boot.
"Brother, don't be afraid of that thug, okay?" Xiao Lin obviously didn't hear my order to leave.
“I’m not afraid of him,” I said irritably. “I think it’s a matter of responsibility. I should do my job well, no matter who my boss is.”
Xiaolin couldn’t help but laugh. “Afraid of you? What can I say after you’ve said that?” After saying that, Xiaolin smiled at me. “There’s an old saying that’s always true: ‘A kind person is often bullied, a good horse is often ridden.’ Don’t be too honest, or others will definitely take advantage of you.” After saying that, Xiaolin left my research room.
Actually, I knew that Xiaolin was standing up for me, but I really didn’t care anymore. Anyway, the more you take things lightly, the less trouble you’ll have.
After organizing the materials at hand, I hurriedly walked to the director’s office. As soon as the director saw me come in, he immediately put on a big smile. The reason I say that is because the moment I pushed open the door, I saw the director’s lifeless expression.
“Please sit down, Gu Cheng!” He stood up and greeted me warmly, which only made me more afraid.
I timidly sat down in my seat. "What did the director want to see me about?" I felt my voice tremble as I spoke.
"Nothing much," he said, crossing his elbows. "Just wanted to know your progress." His voice was still full of amusement.
"You mean Chen Yizhi's case?" I asked, knowing the answer already.
The director laughed heartily. "That's right, this is the most eye-catching case you have!" He leaned back a little, and I couldn't help but feel relieved; his posture had been so intimidating.
"Looks like it's quite tricky!" The director squinted at me. "You don't seem to want to continue." He seemed to find this all quite amusing.
I cleared my throat slightly. "Director, this case is rather special, so I might need to spend a little more time on it..." Before I could finish, he waved his hand, signaling me to stop.
"Do you know what's most eye-catching about this case?" Anyone could hear the hidden meaning in his words, and I had a bad feeling.
“The most unique thing about this case is its timeliness!” I knew his answer wouldn’t be about academic matters; it must have something else to it. It seems my silence was the right thing to do.
“So time is crucial. We must seize this issue before the media frenzy surrounding this type of case cools down. Otherwise, our research project this year will lack focus.”
The result was the same as last time: to gain media attention, for publicity—all of this added up to funding.
“I know time is tight; but I just need a little more time. I don’t think it will delay the overall research project’s progress too much,” I said.
“Yes, time is indeed tight, so you need to have the right approach when time is tight, but I doubt you understand what I mean!” He said this while still smiling. I really found him terrifying; his facial expression and his true feelings seemed like two separate worlds.
“Director, from an academic standpoint, I must remind you that this research…” I tried to state my position, but he still wouldn’t give me a chance to continue.
“I don’t need you to remind me of anything.” "His words carried a hint of anger: 'I only want to ask you one thing, can you finish this report by the end of this month!' He slammed his hand on the table with a thud.
'Yes!' I don't know where I got the courage from: 'I'll definitely submit the report to you next month!'
Director Yang was clearly intimidated by my imposing manner, and his expression softened. After a moment, he slowly spoke: 'Can you really finish it by the end of the month?' His tone was full of doubt.
I nodded confidently.
'That would be best, of course, you know I've always believed in your abilities.'
He laughed again, and I wondered why he said it so naturally. Damn it! Why doesn't this guy become a variety show host!
'However, I've heard some rumors, saying that you...' Damn it, I knew someone was acting as a informant, otherwise why would Director Yang have thought of meeting me!
'Director, it's just a rumor, you won't believe it, will you?' I gave him a way out.
'Of course, I'm just asking, showing some concern.'" "He really knows how to step on things smoothly!"
"Director, these are the documents I have on hand." I remembered the brown paper bag beside me.
"Put them aside for now! I'll look at them when I have time." The director waved his right hand, gesturing for me to put the documents on the table.
"But because this whole research project is very urgent, I hope you can show me the first three chapters of the report next week."
"Director, this is a bit..."
"If you can't do that." He paused, and I could tell he wasn't going to let me say anything more.
"Then I'm sorry, based on work considerations, I have to hand over your work to someone else."
He said it so absolutely, leaving no room for negotiation. I walked heavily out of the director's office like a defeated rooster. Who dared to slander me in front of the director? What a bastard.
"What's wrong?" I looked up and saw H. I shook my head. To run into her at this time, God is really good to me! Damn it!
"You look so listless." "She asked.
Could it be that she badmouthed me to the director?! That thought suddenly popped into my head.
"Did you get a scolding from the director?" She laughed as she spoke. This deepened my suspicion of her.
"I'm sorry!" She stopped laughing and said seriously, "I shouldn't have teased you like that."
I still didn't say anything.
"Don't be like that! I just wanted to make you feel better! Can you forgive me for joking? Don't look at me like that!"
"I didn't mean to blame you!" I said somewhat insincerely, "Maybe I haven't adjusted to my mood yet. You just said I got a scolding!"
"You really don't blame me for joking?" H's tone was full of questions. She winked playfully, "Okay, then you have to let me buy you coffee!"
"What!" This sentence was unexpected.
"It's just to have a cup of coffee in my office! Don't open your mouth so wide." She laughed.
I was about to refuse, but then I thought, she's a big shot in the director's eyes! There's no need to offend her at this time. More importantly, I wanted to confirm whether H was really the one who betrayed me. With that in mind, I readily accepted H's invitation.
I followed H into her office, attracting countless glances from male colleagues along the way (and probably some women too). I figured there must be many people in the center who wanted to be H's mistress!
I scoffed inwardly.
But then again, H is undeniably beautiful—her face and figure are top-notch. I wouldn't be surprised if someone poached her to be a star.
But I just can't stand her!
From this perspective, I think I'm being quite petty. After all, she didn't do anything to me; I guess it was because she took the position that was practically mine! Although I know that's a bit narrow-minded, I just can't get over this.
After entering the office, H asked me to sit on the sofa next to her. Wow! This is the team leader's office that I never got to enter! Looking at the title card on the desk, I really thought for a moment that it would be on my desk.
I took the cup of coffee that H handed me: "Mmm! It smells so good!"
"I hope you like espresso." H said as she walked to the desk opposite me and sat down.
This action surprised me a bit! Wasn't she afraid of showing too much? She was wearing a tight skirt today! Facing the curves of her thighs coming towards me, I couldn't help but lower my head, afraid of accidentally seeing something!
"I heard that Chen Yizhi's diary is giving you a headache?" H said.
"No!" I said, looking up, but as soon as I did, I saw the rounded knees leading to her thighs, and the darkness hidden beneath her skirt. Although it was all black, her firm buttocks and curves, more pronounced than I'd imagined, gave me a burning sensation.
That pink dress looked really good on her, especially her legs, shimmering in sheer stockings—it was a visual feast.
My insides were already stirring, and I tried to calm myself as I took a sip of coffee.
"I see! Then why are there such rumors?" Her legs opened and closed, like an innocent girl sitting by a river admiring the scenery. Was she completely unguarded?
Regardless, my gaze was completely drawn to her movement. With each opening and closing, I felt as if I were searching for something, and the answer lay deep within.
Whether intentionally or unintentionally, she crossed her legs again, and in that instant, I finally found the answer I was looking for! The white underwear, simple and plain, clung tightly to the base of her legs. Though it was only for a moment, it was clear enough! Enough to make one's heart flutter and become infatuated.
"What's wrong with you? You've been acting strange ever since you came in, ignoring me when I talk to you," H's voice was full of reproach.
"Nothing," I realized I was drenched in sweat. Good heavens! This was too much!
"Maybe I was just scratched too badly! I'm feeling a little dizzy." I gave her an awkward smile.
"Oh, I see!" Her expression showed sympathy. "The director is too harsh." Her tone was tinged with pity. After a moment, she seemed to remember something and jumped down from the table.
"Oh, right! I just remembered, I have some medicine in my cabinet, you can try it." She said and immediately went to the cabinet.
I didn't offer any opinion; my head was burning, and I couldn't react at all.
It was a very tall cabinet. H was clinging to it, standing on tiptoe, her hands raised high. I really couldn't understand why she wanted to put things so high. She stretched her arms with difficulty, but it seemed she was just a little short. Actually, I should have shown my gentlemanly manners at this moment; helping her would have been a piece of cake for me!
But I really couldn't bear to give up the pleasure before me
. H's movements revealed a curve that would set any woman aroused. Because she was stretching her arms so forcefully, her breasts thrust out without hesitation. From the pink collar, her two breasts seemed about to burst out, firmly pressing against H's white shirt. I could vaguely see the lines of her breasts pressed out by the excessive pressure, and I could even see the lace of her bra through her white shirt.
36, I thought to myself, maybe even a D cup! I started to reconstruct the overall appearance of her breasts; they should be round and firm. Just thinking about it made my pores dilate violently. I clenched my right fist and rubbed it against my left, imagining what it would feel like to touch it!
Looking down, the area below the waist was even more alluring. Because H's body was pulled upwards, the curves of her buttocks naturally arched. Her round, plump buttocks, encased in the tight skirt, appeared voluptuous and captivating. Due to the tight fit, H's panties were reflected like an embossed design on the pink skirt, the three-dimensional pink lines clearly defining a triangular area. And where the lines intersect is every man's dream; there
lies the checkpoint, the direction from which a man's scepter enters and exits, the home of sperm, the place where pleasure and pain scream and groan.
My scalp trembled, a tingling sensation spreading from my heart to my entire body, burning like fire. I felt a surge of heat within me, my heart pounding like a locomotive.
Revealing the pink pencil skirt were H's long, slender legs. My gaze traveled from her thighs to her calves, then disappeared into her beige high heels. H's... Her legs were truly beautiful, straight, without a single bend that resembled bamboo joints, as even as a baseball bat. Against the backdrop of the bright stockings, they gave a full and radiant feel. In H's movements, those legs displayed a captivating tension, their shimmering flesh-colored skin seeming almost fragile, as if it would melt in the palm of your hand at the slightest touch, striking straight to your heart and creating another kind of throbbing within.
I wiped the sweat from my forehead; the sperm in the tubes began to move restlessly, some even soaking into my underwear.
"Gu Cheng, I think I need your help." H's voice pulled me from my reverie, and I jerked my head up like a spring.
"Oh!" I answered haphazardly, "Okay." I seemed distracted.
"You were daydreaming again," H said irritably. "I've called you twice already, and you didn't answer." H's tone was puzzled and strange.
"You seem to be daydreaming a lot lately!" "H added,
"I don't know why either." I stood up, "Maybe it's like you said! I'm going to develop neurosis!" I made a dazed face.
H laughed, "Stop talking nonsense and come help me!"
I walked behind H, "Where's the medicine?"
"In the top cabinet." H pointed to the top shelf of the cabinet.
"Wow! That's high!" I laughed, "Why do you put things so high up for no reason! You're not that tall yourself. Really!" H
didn't speak, but her eyes held a strange light. For some reason, I felt like there were some codes flickering in her eyes, a feeling that something had happened, or something had already happened, but I was completely unaware.
But I didn't think about it anymore, because after getting closer to H, she started to exude a delicate fragrance.
Xiaolin had told me that women's bodies smelled wonderful, and now I finally understood.
I guessed H was wearing a very light perfume! I really liked the scent; it made me want to lean closer to H. I deliberately shifted my body to get closer, but as I moved, I ended up completely pressed against her. H didn't react much, which emboldened me. I pretended not to find the medicine! But actually, I didn't need to pretend, because it really was hard to find.
Because we were so close, H's scent was much clearer; I realized half of it came from her hair. But regardless of its source, it was truly intoxicating, especially with the physical contact. H's body heat quickly transferred to me; I think I was probably the best heat-conducting receptor. That warmth, though partially obscured by clothing, still seeped into my pores. The temperature flowing into my body, mixed with the scent, formed a powerful solvent, rampaging through me, dissolving my bones, nerves, organs, and blood vessels step by step. My bodily systems were under severe attack, and I had no resistance, letting it erode my senses and erode my thoughts.
I had no other way out but to find neutralization through H! I really wanted to experience that feeling of skin-to-skin contact, to press my fingers on H's breasts and rub them wantonly and unrestrainedly; to let my tongue roam over every inch of her skin; to thrust in and out of her vagina fiercely, hundreds of times, letting H's labia and vagina
enjoy the intense friction and engorgement; I wanted to feel her body writhing; I wanted to hear her moans; I wanted to see her wanton appearance.
I wanted to fuck you! H, I really wanted to fuck you!
"Did you find it?" H's voice suppressed my excited emotions.
"Didn't find it!" I said, "Are you sure you really put the medicine in here?"
I tried to maintain my current composure, knowing that I might grab H at any moment and push her to the ground.
"Yeah!" H's tone was somewhat annoyed: "But I really put the medicine in the cabinet! And I even took it out yesterday!"
"Maybe you forgot to put it back!" I lowered my raised hand.
"No way! I always put things back where they belong!"
"Forget it!" I sighed. "I'm fine, I'll be alright in a bit, and I don't usually take medicine." I left H's side and returned to my original spot. I gulped down the almost cold coffee, a taste similar to Chinese medicine instantly filling my mouth.
"Thank you for your hospitality," I said, "but I have things to do, you know how scary the director's temper can be."
"I know," H immediately understood. "Then go ahead and get busy!"
I nodded, quickly opened the door and left. As I walked out of the room, I vaguely heard H's voice: "Let's have dinner together next time!" However, I pretended not to hear and closed the door.
After leaving H's office, I collapsed in the hallway like a deflated balloon. Oh my god! I actually lost control to this extent, I'm so disappointed in myself.
"Chen Gucheng! You almost fell into the black hole of desire and became its prisoner." I muttered to myself, this muttering gradually expanding into a huge self-reproach. What happened to me! I have no shame at all! Where did all my previous cultivation go? I was incredibly disappointed in my performance just now. I always thought I wasn't a creature driven by lust; that my spiritual level was high enough to break free from the control of these primal instincts. But today, it seems I'm completely powerless against sexual desire. What
's even more terrifying is that what happened in the H room felt like a hypnotic state. I felt my brain was completely non-functional, except for the projection of lustful thoughts. It was as if I was another Chen Gucheng in the H room, as if I had been ripped out alive. This shifting feeling of reality and illusion reminded me of the characteristics of someone with dissociative identity disorder. Could it be that there's a Chen Gucheng within me, surging with lust, throbbing, shouting, even tearing open an exit to replace me?
Yet, I can't clearly distinguish the differences between these two selves! Which one is real, and which one should be eliminated? In that instant, all my values faced a merciless test.
I fled back to my research lab like a refugee.
"You're back!" As soon as I entered, I saw Xiao Qu making a face at me on the computer screen: "I've been waiting for you so long I'm about to lose my temper."
I laughed: "What's up?"
"It's about your brother! Director Lin Jingsheng of the Xintucheng Detention Center called back and said you can see him before 4 pm today, and he can arrange an interview with Chen Yizhi for you." Xiao Qu's news cheered me up; it was probably the happiest thing that had happened to me so far today.
"Wow! You're really the most efficient research specialist in the country. Thanks!" I said.
"What's the use of just saying it!" Xiao Qu pouted: "He went through a lot of trouble to make the appointment for you, and he just waited for you for so long!"
Of course, I understood what she meant.
"Trying to skip work to see your boyfriend again?"
"Oh! What do you mean 'again'? This is only the second time!" Xiao Qu shook her head, looking coquettish.
"Yes!" I exclaimed deliberately, "It's only the second time this week!"
"Don't be like that! We're so close, friends are supposed to help each other out, right?"
She was starting to act like a spoiled child.
"Okay, okay! Fine, I give up. But I have to warn you, watch out! Don't be so arrogant, don't always skip work..."
"Okay! I'll go now, bye!" Before I could finish, she interrupted me. It seemed the community didn't take my words seriously at all. The computer screen disappeared as she said goodbye. I smiled and opened Chen Yizhi's diary.
Now I had thoughts of work again.
I think I'm probably stupid! To say something like that to a computer-generated image. But thinking that now is a thing of the past.
I spread Xiaoyu's legs and stuck my head inside.
My hand reached into Xiaoyu's private area. Good heavens, she was already soaking wet! My fingers felt a thick, sticky wetness. Her orange clitoris was slightly swollen from engorgement. I carefully probed inside, and Xiaoyu's body writhed, her breath tinged with moans.
"Please!" Xiaoyu's voice was like a broken string of pearls: "Spare me!"
I didn't speak. I carefully used my fingers to follow the flow of fluid from Xiaoyu's vulva, probing into her opening section by section. Xiaoyu's legs began to tremble slightly, and my penis was already throbbing and hot.
Now it should be enough, I thought! I gripped my penis and pressed the glans against Xiaoyu's entrance.
"Am I going in?" I murmured beside Xiaoyu, and she squinted her eyes and nodded gently.
My brain received the command at that moment, immediately directing my penis to attack her last stronghold.
Thrusting in her soaked vagina, an unprecedented tightness brought a sense of exhilaration. My movements were drowned out by Xiaoyu's moans, as if by unspoken agreement, each movement a sound.
In that passionate moment, the flying sweat, Xiaoyu's tightly closed eyes, her spread pink legs brazenly forming a V-shape across the bed, the weight of her buttocks settling between her thighs, and her constantly twisting waist—these almost became frozen images. Only in the final instant did Xiaoyu arch her body high, shouting incomprehensible sounds, followed by a sudden spasm of contraction in my penis, a burst of pent-up power. Immediately following, however, was another emotion, a calm almost devoid of feeling, permeating my entire being in the instant after ejaculation. Slightly weary, I turned over and lay down beside Xiaoyu's gradually calming breathing.
I recalled my rock climbing trip to Longdong last week. Just as I was almost at the top, I accidentally missed my right foothold, and I was in freefall, plummeting towards the ground at an unprecedented speed. The instant I hit the ground, I was suddenly pulled back up by the rope around my waist. Right: it's like bungee jumping or skydiving—enjoying the thrill of the fall, followed by a sudden, intense pull, leaving my testicles numb between gravity and air resistance.
This must be the prototype of sex! Or rather, the steps of ejaculation! The process of penile erection and atrophy is often just a shift in emotion—a primal surge of excitement at its peak, then an abrupt stop, signifying the cessation of all sensations and emotions.
No! It shouldn't be called a cessation, but rather another emotion, with greater energy, replacing all the emotions and sensations condensed into the thick, white fluid during ejaculation. And that is numbness! Numbness from head to testicles, like a collective work stoppage, leaves the entire body feeling exhausted.
I don't know if the diary entries weren't compelling enough or if I'd completely regained control, but reading this part, I felt absolutely nothing! Strangely enough, the scenes Chen Yizhi described here had completely transcended eroticism and become a form of reflection. It felt like I was reading a treatise on sex, which I found rather dull.
I simply closed the diary, deciding to give myself a good rest. But once I was away from work, my thoughts drifted like a kite with a broken string.
"What kind of person is Chen Yizhi?" My thoughts lingered on him, and I began to sketch his outline in my mind.
After a while, I realized how pointless this was. How old am I, still doing such foolish things? Really! Everything will be clear when I get to the Xintucheng Detention Center, won't it?
"Ah!" I exclaimed, almost forgetting to call Lin Jingsheng! I quickly contacted Lin Jingsheng.
"Director Lin?"
The head on the computer screen nodded slightly. "That's me. I think you're probably Chen Gucheng."
"Yes, I'd like to confirm the interview this afternoon." I thought my tone was polite enough.
"Hmm! It should be fine, but what research value could a ruthless criminal like Chen Yizhi possibly have?" Director Lin's face was cold.
"Heh, heh." I chuckled bitterly. "That's a common dilemma we face, but anyway, we always hope there will be less crime in society!"
"Anyway, I don't understand these things!" He paused. "Then come over at four o'clock! I'll tell the guards."
"Director Lin, could you briefly talk about what kind of person Chen Yizhi is?" I asked. The Director Lin on the computer screen looked wary. He probably mistook me for one of those newspaper reporters trying to dig up inside stories.
"I think this will help me get into the swing of things faster, and don't worry, our conversation won't be recorded." I quickly added.
Director Lin's expression softened a bit. "He's a devil! Clever, calm, sometimes you can't even tell what kind of person he is, all psychopaths are like him." His tone was angry, as if Chen Yizhi should be on the electric chair immediately.
"Oh!" I felt I didn't need to ask any more questions.
"Be careful." Director Lin continued, "Be careful of his evil, don't be fooled by his words."
"I understand, thank you." After I said that, the call ended. Lin Jingsheng is probably the kind of person who clearly distinguishes between good and evil, like Bao Zheng! This kind of person is sometimes very troublesome, I'm most afraid of this kind of person.
According to Xiao Lin, this kind of person is either a person with a high degree of mental fastidiousness or a hypocrite wearing the sugarcoat of morality. Sigh! Thinking about dealing with this kind of person later, it will definitely be troublesome after I see him.
(III)
After entering the reception room, I still couldn't quite believe that this was a prison. In my mind, prisons should be dark and musty, with the smell of men, and the atmosphere should be serious, even slightly menacing. I admit these are my stereotypes, but here, the windows are bright and clean, and the smiling guards seem a bit off! What's even more surprising is that the guards don't carry guns anymore.
"Mr. Chen, this is probably your first time in a prison!" The guard leading the way probably noticed my astonished expression.
"Yes!" I replied somewhat casually.
"Prisons have changed a lot in recent years. Most prisons are now moving towards becoming like parks." He said with some pride, "This is an image that prisons didn't have before. This shows the government's dedication and efforts in prison administration over the past few years. Don't you think so, Mr. Chen?"
"Yes! Yes!" I nodded with a smile.
After passing through the corridor, there was a large building ahead, where the guard stopped.
"Mr. Chen, this building is our reception building. Director Lin is waiting for you inside." Before he finished speaking, the building's door suddenly opened, and Director Lin Jingsheng walked out.
"Please come in, Mr. Chen." Director Lin's tone was exactly the same as on the communicator, even his expression was the same. Honestly, I thought it would be different from the computer screen!
After entering the door, Director Lin didn't even seem to follow.
"Chen Yizhi is inside!" He still had a cold expression: "Don't worry, the interview room is isolated; you won't be in any danger. I have other things to attend to, so I won't keep you company." After saying this, he turned and left. This guy is even more annoying than on the computer screen!
I entered a room that looked somewhat like an isolated interrogation room. Chen Yizhi was on the other side of a large floor-to-ceiling window. I guessed that the window must be a mirror on Chen Yizhi's side.
I moved to a seat and carefully observed Chen Yizhi.
This guy is quite handsome! This is a huge difference from what I initially imagined. I thought he would definitely look like a weasel-faced, timid person. But seeing him today, I realized how incredibly unrealistic my guess was.
He was so refined-looking, slender, and handsome, his entire demeanor belying someone who wouldn't guess he was a serial rapist and murderer. To use an outdated literary novel's phrasing, it would be: a faint sadness lingered in his eyes. Could someone with such looks really only find women willing to have sex with him in virtual reality?
That's a joke! A handsome guy like him would have countless women vying for his attention!
"You're Chen Yizhi?" I still had some doubts.
"Yes," he replied.
"I think you already know why I'm here!" I began to calm down from my incredulity.
"I think so."
"Is that so?" I laughed. "Very well, can we begin?"
"Oh!" Chen Yizhi sounded surprised. "I didn't know lab rats had human rights."
"What do you mean?"
"Aren't you here for some research? Aren't you planning to dissect me using some theories?" He sneered. "Can you deny it?"
I didn't answer, and Chen Yizhi didn't continue. We seemed to be waiting, waiting for each other's next words.
“Your silence is frustrating,” Chen Yizhi broke the silence. “It means you can’t defend yourself against my accusations.”
“I don’t think I need to,” I said, somewhat angrily. “You have no right to question me. Please understand the crimes you’ve committed.”
“I see!” Chen Yizhi’s expression was one of frustration and disappointment.
“I think I’ve really forgotten who I am,” he said. Hearing this, I couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. Actually, I didn’t harbor any hostility towards him. Although he was a notorious rapist and murderer, I didn’t judge him as good or evil; I just felt sorry for him.
“I’m not here to interrogate you. I don’t want to judge you by moral standards. I just want to talk to you, to understand why you did what you did. I believe you know that such interviews help us understand the behavior of people like you, and I think this will be of great help to our society.”
My tone softened.
"The behavior of people like us?" Chen Yizhi sneered. "Do you really know what I've done?"
"What do you mean?" I was puzzled by his words.
"I'm just someone who's obsessed with virtual reality! If you want to know what people like us think, asking me alone doesn't make much sense in terms of sheer numbers."
"Of course we know that." I tried to sound professional. "The issue of virtual reality and life has recently sparked heated discussions in the media, and we have specialists doing other research on this topic. But your situation is rather special, which is why we wanted to interview you."
"What's so special about me?" Chen Yizhi looked puzzled.
"That's a strange question!" I was getting angry. Did this guy not care at all about what he had done?
"Oh!" Chen Yizhi exclaimed as if he had just realized something. "You probably mean my conviction, right? Hmm, if that's the case, I'm a bit special."
"You make it sound so easy." I imagine my face must be quite pale right now. "So easy it's like it has nothing to do with you."
"Because these crimes have nothing to do with me."
"Is that so? But you've already been convicted, haven't you? And the evidence is irrefutable, all the evidence is enough to prove your guilt. Can you still say you have nothing to do with this case?" I think I was really angry.
"I was framed!" Chen Yizhi became agitated. "From the time I was arrested until the interrogation, I kept emphasizing this, but no one was willing to believe me! I was framed!" He slammed his fist on the table and roared.
This action startled me. I sat there stunned, not knowing how to respond.
"Don't get so agitated." I tried to comfort him. "Sit down first, let's talk things out slowly."
He looked at me coldly, then suddenly laughed. A strange fear crept into my body. I stared at him blankly.
“I forgot you’re a criminologist!” His tone made me uncomfortable, as if he were mocking me. But besides anger, I felt even more fear, because his smile was so cold, and I was terrified of what he might do.
“Don’t be afraid.” He seemed to read my mind. “What can I do to you? This is a prison!
Besides, I’m handcuffed.” He stretched out his right hand, showing me the iron cuffs on his wrist.
I gave a bitter smile. “I’m not as useless as you think.”
“That’s right! Otherwise, how would you dare come to a place like this alone?” He said slowly. “By the way, do you have a cigarette? I’m used to smoking one while talking.”
“Sorry! I don’t have that habit.”
“Is that so!” He smiled, and this time I wasn’t afraid anymore.
“That’s quite like you!” he continued.
“Oh!” This piqued my interest. I’ve always enjoyed hearing what others think of me.
“Tell me!” I said.
“You’re a very meticulous person, you like to have everything under control.” He rested his chin on his hand, tilting his head to look at me. “So of course you won’t pick up these bad habits.”
“I don’t see any connection between the two,” I retorted.
“Perhaps I should be clearer,” he said. “You don’t like to get caught up in things you can’t control, you like everything to be orderly, you’re used to putting yourself in situations you can manage, so things like smoking, which are addictive, are a challenge to your lifestyle.”
“Amazing!” I laughed. “Amazing reasoning, I’d like to say you’re right; but no, you’re wrong. I don’t smoke just because I think smoking is bad for my lungs.”
“Oh! Is that so?” His tone was very uncomfortable. “You’re willing to work late into the night, aren’t you?”
I nodded. “Yes! So what!”
“Working late into the night is also bad for your health! Then why do you stay up late?” he asked, his eyes seeming to have a light that had already knocked me down.
“These are two completely different things!” I hurriedly argued.
“So I said you’re a very contradictory individual.”
“Is that your conclusion?”
“Today’s,” he said.
“What do you mean?” I didn’t understand, but I felt like I’d fallen into a trap.
“I mean we’ll have another chance to talk about you later.”
“How can you be so sure!” I asked.
“Because of what I know about you; you’re not someone who gives up halfway.”
I was about to speak, but he beat me to it.
“Let’s get back to your original purpose!” he said with a smile. His reminder made me realize I’d wasted a lot of time.
“But you might be disappointed if your question is about my motives and causes of the crime.” He shrugged easily: “Because I’ve said it many times, I didn’t kill anyone!”
“That’s not just something you’re emphasizing.” I was no longer uneasy: “Many people have proclaimed their innocence in court.”
“Are you trying to say I’m just a typical example?” he said, quite the sharp-tongued fellow.
“I’m not a judge! So I don’t want to argue with you about your guilt or innocence anymore.” I thought a roundabout approach might be more effective.
“I accept that!” he said; it seemed there was finally some progress.
“Let’s discuss your views on sex.”
“You mean having sex in virtual reality?” He reacted quite quickly.
“That’s part of it, of course, but what I was referring to earlier was broader. It includes your views on the opposite sex, your views on intercourse, and so on.” I further explained my question.
“May I ask you a question first?”
“Sure,” I said.
"Are you still a virgin?" He seemed to find it amusing.
"If I'm not mistaken, you probably are."
Surprisingly, I wasn't angry at all. I seemed used to these kinds of questions; I was just annoyed. Did being a virgin really matter? Damn it, it was like some kind of indicator.
"What's the point of this question?" I was utterly fed up.
"Judging from your reaction, you're probably a virgin." He laughed, a genuinely happy laugh, which I felt was an insult.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to mock you; I just found it funny," he said. I felt like he had some kind of ability to read my mind.
"Because you're conducting research related to sex, but you have absolutely no experience in this area, that's why I couldn't help but laugh," he added. "
So, according to you, conducting research on the psychology of criminals without committing any crimes would also be just as interesting to you?" I said, somewhat angrily.
“Perhaps! Human behavior is a very complex experience, something that can't be summarized by theories or the Bible. I believe you understand that.”
I realized my roles with Chen Yizhi seemed to have reversed, and I had a urge to end this conversation immediately.
“You don’t need to be embarrassed about it. Actually, I’m a virgin too.”
This guy really believed he was innocent! There wasn’t a single contradiction in his words. If he wasn’t truly innocent, then he was the closest person to the devil I’d ever met. If it was the former, then it was a matter of law, and I had no right or ability to interfere. If it was the latter…
I decided to end this conversation! At least I didn’t want to talk to him anymore today.
“I think we should end our conversation here!” I put away the documents on the table. “Maybe we can talk again another day.”
“Maybe? Another day?” Chen Yizhi said coldly. “I used to use that kind of talk to brush people off.”
“Oh! Is that so?” I replied indifferently.
“But you will definitely come back to me.” Chen Yizhi said with a smile, “You definitely will.”
I didn’t want to pay attention to anything he said anymore. I stood up to leave.
“Because we’re the same kind of people, I understand you. You’ll definitely come back to me!” His tone was full of confidence.
Hearing these words, I wavered again, a feeling of unease welling up inside me. I turned to look at Chen Yizhi. I didn’t know where his confidence came from; my confidence was almost drowned out by his expression.
Walking out of the detention center, I realized it was already dark. The deep winter nights always seem to pass quickly, just like my conversation with Chen Yizhi. My mind was still filled with our conversation. For some reason, I increasingly felt that this case wasn’t so simple.
“Chen Yizhi is a devil! There’s absolutely no mistake about that. Only a devil can cloud a person’s mind. You mustn’t be fooled by him.” I remembered what Director Lin had told me when he saw me out.
Applying that to my current feelings was actually very dangerous, because my mind was indeed somewhat confused, but I couldn’t figure out if the confusion stemmed from Chen Yizhi being a devil or from being deceived. If Chen Yizhi was a devil, the problem might be easier to solve; if the problem was being deceived, then that would be troublesome! Because I don't know who deceived me—was it Chen Yizhi, or someone else? The core of these questions lies in whether Chen Yizhi actually committed murder! Is he really the cruel killer who raped and murdered multiple women, as the media or the court claim?
Actually, when I thought about these questions, I felt I already had a stance: Chen Yizhi is not the murderer!
This stance had already existed, but it lacked any supporting evidence. It was merely my innate intuition and a deep distrust of the judicial system and the media. Of course, I was also very confused because I couldn't confirm my intuition, and after meeting Chen Yizhi, I was deeply afraid that my intuition would make me a victim of evil.
On the way to the car, I kept thinking about this question, but besides intensifying my inner struggle, I didn't reach any conclusion.
Until the engine started, I decided to stop thinking about it. After all, I'm just a psychologist; I'm not very good at upholding justice, and the whole story is still unclear! So it's none of my business.
Thinking this way, I felt much lighter. The car slowly drove onto the new Provincial Highway 2, and I turned on the radio.
"...The deceased's name is Li Jinquan, and he owns a hotel on Xinzhongxiao East Road. According to his friends, Li was usually generous and wouldn't have made enemies. The police have preliminarily determined it to be a robbery, possibly because the thief was caught in the act by Li, which triggered his murderous intent. Currently, the police have screened gangs with local ties and are conducting a nationwide crackdown on habitual thieves. The police say they are confident of solving the case soon. Taipei news..."
Seriously, why am I hearing this kind of news lately? Doesn't the government declare this year a year of good security every year?
What's going on? There's been no progress in security at all. I changed the channel, feeling a bit frustrated. Maybe I should listen to some music! Hearing this kind of news all the time makes life feel gloomy.
Hotel owner! A hotel on Xinzhongxiao East Road. I thought of the hotel Xiaolin and I went to yesterday.
"No way!" I muttered to myself, "I can't be that unlucky!" I was inexplicably involved in a murder case this morning, even though it was just a misunderstanding, it was already bad enough. But to put my mind at ease, I turned on my communicator and contacted Xiaolin.
"It's you!" Xiaolin's face looked grim on the screen.
"I asked you, what's the name of the owner of the hotel we went to yesterday?" I asked urgently.
"Looks like you got the news too." Xiaolin's tone was indifferent; it seemed my premonition was right again. Honestly, I hate myself for always guessing correctly.
"Sigh! I never thought Quan would be murdered." Xiaolin lowered her head: "He even poured me drinks yesterday! Life is so unpredictable!"
I rarely saw Xiaolin like this, and my mood grew heavy. After the call ended, I decided not to go back to the lab. Anyway, I had Chen Yizhi's diary with me, so I might as well take the research materials home. Being at home might make me feel better! At least I'd be more free.
In the classroom, the students were excitedly talking about yesterday's holiday. Xiaoyu, sitting two rows in front of me, was surrounded by several classmates chatting—what a strange feeling! Thinking about how sweet and affectionate she was in my arms yesterday, it seemed like nothing had happened today.
But that's not so strange; nothing really happened! For me, it was just a game; for Xiaoyu, it was a memory that never existed. It was all just my fantasy, and Xiaoyu shouldn't have to bear the burden of my fantasies.
Thinking about this made me feel a little sad.
But the lust within me didn't diminish because of this emotion; my eyes continued to search for objects for my fantasies. Once the game begins, it's impossible to stop, especially when it comes to desire. It always expands with a craving. I knew I was already hopelessly addicted, but the pleasure of that moment of intercourse, the spasms before ejaculation, that tingling sensation, made me want to try it again and again.
My eyes lingered on Xiao Ai—no! To be precise, they lingered on her snow-white thighs.
Xiao Ai is known as the "Ice Queen" in our class. Countless people, both inside and outside the department and school, have their eyes on her, but none of them catch her eye. Her arrogance is practically her trademark, but it also makes her seem unapproachable. Therefore, Xiao Ai isn't very popular in class. I think, aside from those who are pursuing her, everyone has a rather poor impression of her.
However, even those with a bad impression of her would admit that Xiao Ai has a beautiful face and figure. Everyone who has seen Xiao Ai (I'm referring to men here) is attracted by her honey-sweet face, and then burned by her hot body. It's a perfect combination—a beautiful face plus a great body; the effect is like salt on a watermelon, enhancing its sweetness.
I really want to see what Xiao Ai is like in bed! No, a woman like this should be conquered with force to achieve greater pleasure; such a woman is the touchstone for every man's penis.
Thinking of this, my penis began to get excited. I secretly took out my digital camera and casually strolled past Xiao Ai, snapping a few photos.
"I'll try to maintain my haughty demeanor!" I thought to myself. "That way, I'll have more fun."
Back home, as usual, I scanned Xiao Ai's photos. My mood was completely different from yesterday; a burning anger seemed to ignite within me, a desire to pierce through Xiao Ai's aloof expression. My mind was filled with thoughts of conquest, making me feel exhilarated.
After starting the software, the entire room quickly transformed into a dark alleyway.
Xiao Ai was right in front of me, running frantically with her back to me. In the dim light, her white dress stood out clearly.
I chased after her, experiencing a thrill of hunting. Xiao Ai's white skirt flashed in the dark alleyway, leaving a trail of light. Her white underwear was faintly visible with each step. I could have caught up with her instantly, but I couldn't bear to give up the pleasure I was enjoying. Her swaying hips gripped tightly around the man's dream paradise. Her large breasts, bobbing violently from the exertion, barely concealed their roundness. Sweat, from fear and running, traced the curves of her body.
The thought of tearing her apart soon made my penis swell uncontrollably.
Finally, under the streetlight, I caught the fleeing Xiao Ai. My hands gripped her breasts tightly. Xiao Ai cried out, which only accelerated my movements. My hands squeezed and pressed, freely playing with her large breasts; the soft velvet against them provided an unprecedentedly luxurious tactile experience. Xiao Ai's expression was a mixture of panic, fear, and anger; she frantically shook her hands, trying to break free of my clutches. Faced with her resistance, I felt an overwhelming sense of power, an unprecedented surge of authority coursing through me; moreover, the friction from her violent movements allowed me to be intimately close to Xiao Ai's beautiful body.
I pushed Xiao Ai towards the streetlight, pressing her wrists firmly against the cold metal with my right hand, while my left hand ripped her shirt. I absolutely loved that sound—a hissing sound, like a torrent of lust spilling onto the ground.
After tearing her shirt, her two round breasts sprang out, their elasticity sending shivers down my spine. I squeezed and kneaded them forcefully, as if trying to burst them. Xiao Ai could no longer hold back, letting out soft moans. She tried to break free, but she was no match for my brute force. Of course, my feet weren't idle either. I used my right knee to pry open her tightly closed legs, aiming straight for her genitals. Xiao Ai
immediately clamped her legs even tighter at this attack, but my right knee still managed to push her away.
My left foot landed on the back of her left foot, while my right knee arched her right leg, revealing her beautiful buttocks in full view.
I couldn't wait to reach down and pull down Xiao Ai's panties, though she desperately tried to hold onto that last line of defense. After a struggle, I simply ripped them apart. Xiao Ai made some incoherent noises, but I was certain she was crying.
"Serves you right!" I thought to myself, ecstatic. "Who told you to be so arrogant all the time?" Thinking of her usual haughty demeanor, I felt this was her just desserts. I was a punisher sent by heaven to end her pride.
Pride is a great sin, and Satan was cast into hell because of it! This perfectly described Xiao Ai's situation today.
I pulled out my penis and inserted it into Xiao Ai's vagina from behind. Xiao Ai let out a scream, her piercing cry echoing throughout the alley. Finally, she stopped resisting, quietly letting me thrust in and out at will.
Gradually, Xiao Ai's body began to respond. She was no longer like a dead fish, limp and heaving with my movements, as she had been at first. Her hips began to move slowly, heavy but rhythmic breathing escaping her teeth, and faint, pleasurable moans reached my ears.
Her movements intensified; I released her hands, only to see her grip the metal tightly, her buttocks raised high, as if welcoming my penetration.
Encouraged, I thrust even harder. Actually, Xiao Ai's reaction wasn't surprising, because I felt she was already soaking wet the moment I entered her.
Another cold sweat broke out! I felt like I was studying a pornographic document! Faced with the overwhelming lust, I was clearly overwhelmed. A powerful ejaculation pierced my brain, the strong, hot force almost piercing my jeans. This tingling sensation reached my brain, as if defying my brain, flaunting its power, telling my control system that all resistance was futile. Before sperm, all thoughts must submit.
Regardless, such thoughts still unpleasant me, but I didn't want to delve deeper, because the feeling I had last time had terrified me. I just shook my head and continued reading.
Conquest is essentially a form of satisfaction. Pure domination is intoxicating, irresistible. I know this statement will definitely upset women. However, this issue doesn't involve the relationship between men and women; it's merely the relationship between the dominant and the dominated, like a lion eating an antelope. You can't say the lion has a "great lionism" mentality; it's all just one word: "power." It has nothing to do with gender, good or evil; it's all just power. So women can also rape men, without hesitation, if you have the power, just do it!
Because this is the law governing the entire universe! The operation between planets isn't controlled by abstract concepts like love that people presume to understand; those clichéd notions can be set aside. It's all just power controlling things.
And this power, especially in sexual intercourse, drives people to madness. It sounds crazy, but the mythical parts are always hard to believe, yet they are the most blissful.
Looking at Xiao Ai's exhausted and disheveled state, I felt a surge of pride and confidence.
But all of this vanished rapidly after the computer was shut down. As soon as the light on the wall went out, everything before my eyes disappeared, and I realized that all the sensations were an illusion. Of course, I had this realization in mind when I reached for the computer to shut it down, but facing the disappearance of everything, a strange sense of regret welled up inside me!
Why can I only find solace in such a world?
Why can I only do whatever I want in such a world?
Why isn't any of this real?
As my thoughts wandered, I realized I was slowly losing sight of the line between virtual and reality. It seemed that only in the world of T2000 did I truly exist. The so-called real world, on the other hand, felt like a false existence, superfluous and laughable.
Having tasted the sweetness of it all, I replicated several more climaxes. Although I knew the final outcome all along, each one felt fresh.
I think of a particularly noteworthy moment in my recent games: I raped my high school English teacher. This was a new exploration of sexuality, and the experience was truly unforgettable.
Actually, it was just an accident. While casually searching through my high school classmates' directory, I saw a picture of this universally disliked English teacher. Although she was repulsive, she was undeniably beautiful!
That became my reason for raping her! Because when a beautiful woman is repulsive, that's when she's begging to be fucked. Ha! I hadn't heard the word "begging to be fucked" in a long time; I used to think it was too crude, but today it seems quite apt.
The feeling of tearing her clothes was indescribable. I found my penis was erect and harder than ever before. I even noticed my hands were trembling as I ripped her clothes off! After
stripping her naked, I went straight in. I pressed her against the wall, without any caresses or kisses, and thrust my penis directly into her vagina from behind.
I still remember the friction, the rough stinging sensation, the raw power of intercourse, the feeling of breaking through everything, which sent my nerves into a frenzy.
And so, like a wild beast out of control, I writhed and thrust violently. The teacher shook her head frantically, moaning and groaning, whether from pleasure or pain, I couldn't tell. Whatever, it was just my own enjoyment.
Really! That ejaculation was the most pleasurable one yet. In the moment before everything was released, the intense numbness almost overwhelmed all my other senses. The moment of ejaculation was the sublimation of all sensations. A sublimation of pure essence, an absolute purity.
Old Pei's smooth skin, intertwined with my bodily fluids. Watching her lean against the wall, panting heavily, watching her frantically grab her clothes to cover herself, the fire of desire within me blazed fiercely again.
I pulled open the clothes in her hands; her breasts, which I had just kneaded, were still firm and erect!
I lifted the teacher's thigh, and strangely, she no longer resisted. Her eyes were filled with resentment, or perhaps you could say sorrow.
I didn't care! Sorrow, resentment—it's all your own doing! Who told you to be so arrogant in class, always looking down on us?
Today, I'm here to punish these self-important bastards. I hoisted her thigh onto my shoulders and thrust in again.
My semen filled the teacher's vagina, but this time the penetration was smoother, unlike the previous dryness. I glanced at her genitals and noticed blood flowing from her inner thighs. Was the fluid inside her vagina blood?
This thought only fueled my excitement; I hadn't realized I was so powerful.
My movements continued, even becoming more vigorous. The teacher mostly watched me expressionlessly, but occasionally her body would tremble with a few more intense thrusts.
"Is it good, teacher?" I shouted as I went, "It's great, isn't it! Your student has such skill today, you should be very pleased! Enjoy it! Haha!"
This guy is insane! I started to find Chen Yizhi disgusting; he actually wanted to rape his high school teacher!
This is truly unacceptable to modern people. Although it's just a computer game, this almost confirms the motive for his crime. After reading this diary, everyone would think he must be the murderer.
Sigh! The government should also legislate to regulate computer software companies. This damned stuff is just encouraging so many more sex crimes! The most terrifying thing about virtual reality is that it blurs the lines between reality and fiction. I believe Chen Yizhi must have thought he was in a game when he raped Yi Qingyu.
His diary entries clearly state that he could no longer distinguish between virtual and reality, and that only in the world of T2000 could his life find meaning.
Thinking about this, I immediately worry about the people living in this rampant computer world. If one day, everyone has too many different definitions of the world we live in, our civilization will face an unprecedented catastrophe. Especially now, with such advanced computer imaging technology, the world seems to consist only of a small computer screen. How many people like Chen Yizhi will this development create?
Thinking about Chen Yizhi makes me angry; I even defended him at first! I even thought he might not be such a murderer; but now I think it's almost certain that Chen Yizhi raped and murdered Yi Qingyu. Looking at his sexual desires in his diary, his thoughts of abusing the weak, even his desire to rape a teacher—if this kind of person doesn't commit crimes, then who will?
"Damn it!" I cursed, getting angrier the more I thought about it, my emotions starting to swell. I decided to rest for a while.
Sitting alone on the sofa, bored, I picked up the remote. Honestly, I didn't want to watch TV, but I didn't know what else to do. In this hesitation, the TV screen came on. But I immediately regretted my decision.
"Another murder?!" I stared helplessly at the screen.
"Another woman raped and murdered. What's going on? Ever since Chen Yizhi was arrested, there have been so many news reports like this!"
"Is our society sick?!" I was a little angry.
"Wow, a policewoman! This is too outrageous!" I exclaimed, my mouth agape when I saw the victim's identity on the TV. What the hell! Even the police couldn't protect himself!
A policewoman! Didn't Kobayashi say he slept with a policewoman when he was questioned by the police the day before?
What kind of connection is this?! I tapped my head. It can't be that coincidental! It shouldn't be that coincidental! I think, because Kobayashi usually likes to brag, and more than half of what he says is unreliable except when he's doing something serious. Kobayashi said he slept with a policewoman, which probably just means he chatted up a policewoman, and she responded. It's very likely just that, and sleeping with a policewoman in prison is really too far-fetched, but considering what's happened to Kobayashi recently, it seems like everyone connected to him gets killed the next day, so following this logic, it seems quite possible. Of course, first of all, Kobayashi would actually have to have sex with a policewoman for it to be true.
If that's really the case, then Kobayashi is a really "scummy" person. Will I be in danger? Although it's impossible for me to have sex with him! But the hotel owner probably didn't have sex with Xiaolin either, yet he still got killed.
Thinking about this, I couldn't help but feel a little scared, hoping my intuition was wrong. I dialed Xiaolin's number.
"Xiaolin! It's me, Xiaomao!"
"I know." Xiaolin on the screen looked tired: "Besides you, probably no one would dare dig me up at this time." Xiaolin yawned.
"Ha! Sorry! I didn't mean to cause you trouble." I felt a little embarrassed.
"Oh!" Kobayashi drawled out, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
"You think you can get away with this?" Kobayashi glanced at me sideways. "You'd better have a good reason for waking me from my sleep."
"Okay! I'll try." I laughed. "So, have you seen today's news?" I asked.
"You woke me from my sweet dreams just to ask if I've seen the news?" Kobayashi looked like a volcano; if it weren't for the computer screen, I think I would have been burned.
"Of course not!" I hurriedly retorted, "I haven't even said anything yet! I wanted to ask if you know if another woman was raped and murdered today?"
"Brother, this isn't news anymore, these kinds of things happen every day!"
"But this time it was a policewoman."
"Oh! That's interesting." Xiao Cai seemed a bit excited: "Working with a policewoman is really fun! This guy knows his stuff."
"Hey! Someone was murdered, and you're not even shocked, but you're actually looking gloating. Don't you think you're going too far? This is a human life!" I was really annoyed by Xiao Lin's attitude. Although he's always been like this, this time he really went too far.
"Hey! You know that's just the kind of person I am! Okay, okay, I admit I was wrong, don't be angry!" Xiao Lin apologized to me: "You didn't just want to tell me this, did you?"
I knew Xiao Lin was changing the subject, but I didn't want to argue with him anymore. Anyway, he can't change, so why get angry over something like this?
"I wanted to know if that policewoman was the one you slept with last time?"
"Do you think that has anything to do with it?" Xiaolin's tone suddenly turned displeased.
"I'm just a little worried, because if it's the policewoman you slept with, I'm afraid you'll be in trouble again, and this time I won't be able to vouch for your innocence. Besides, if you're frequently called in by the police, it might affect your job..." I hadn't originally intended to say that; I just wanted to joke with him, but I didn't expect Xiaolin to seem a little unhappy, which immediately made my intention to tease him disappear.
"I'll keep an eye on this news." Xiaolin's tone turned cold. "Xiao Mao, you don't actually think I'm the murderer, do you?"
"What are you talking about!" I exclaimed. "Of course I don't think so! I'm just worried you'll get yourself into trouble again."
"I didn't realize you were so kind!" Xiaolin's tone finally returned to normal. "Are you going to say something like, 'Don't complicate relationships,' or 'Walking on the dark side too much will definitely lead to encountering ghosts,' or other such nonsense?"
"I almost forgot, Xiaolin. Don't complicate relationships, and you'll definitely encounter ghosts if you walk on the dark side too much. Think about it!"
"Go to hell!" Xiaolin laughed and cursed.
"Alright, I won't disturb your sleep anymore. Remember not to get yourself into trouble! It's not worth it just for sex!" I said this seriously. And Xiaolin nodded.
"I know, I'll be careful." Xiaolin seemed to have thought of something: "Xiao Mao! Sometimes you shouldn't take things too seriously. Some things are better left unsaid, otherwise you'll have trouble later."
Xiaolin's expression was strange when he said this, and when I wanted to ask him again, he had already disappeared from the screen.
I didn't know what Xiaolin meant, but I seemed to smell a hint of danger.
(IV)
To be honest, I really didn't want to come to this place, but for some reason, I felt it was necessary to get first-hand information from Chen Yizhi, after all, I was doing research! It wasn't worth getting angry with someone like him.
"I told you long ago that you would definitely come back to find me." Chen Yizhi's smile was full of victory.
I knew this guy would say that, so I was prepared. I didn't want to argue with him over such a trivial matter.
“Let’s not waste time,” I said bluntly. “Do you think you’re still in virtual reality?”
“Maybe!” Chen Yizhi laughed. “Are you going to discuss existentialism with me?”
“Of course not,” I said. “I just want to know what it feels like to have sex in the T2000.”
“Not bad,” Chen Yizhi shifted his position. “You’ll find that this software is sufficient to meet human sexual needs. Most importantly, it provides a legal and clean mode of intercourse.”
“Can you elaborate?” I asked curiously, leaning forward involuntarily.
“Ha, ha,” Chen Yizhi suddenly burst into laughter. “Why?”
“What do you mean?” I asked, puzzled. “What do you mean by ‘why’?”
“It’s just a study. Why do you need to know every detail?” Chen Yizhi’s words were clearly probing.
“Of course, a study needs to understand every detail!”
“Is that so?” His expression was full of suspicion, which made me very uncomfortable.
“Just say what you want to say,” I thought, I’ve had enough of this guy! “Don’t be so self-important.” I tried to keep my emotions in check.
“I’m sorry.” Chen Yizhi was probably startled by my reaction. “I didn’t mean to show off my intelligence. I just think you’re different from others. The researchers I’ve met before, like you, always put research first, regardless of others’ or their own feelings; but you’re different. I felt you were different from them from the moment I saw you.”
“Oh!” I was really annoyed by this conversation. “How am I different?”
“You’re very humane!” he said, a point I didn’t disagree with at all.
“Your purpose in doing research isn’t to discover some great theory, but just for yourself.” he said.
“Please explain.” I said.
“I think you’re looking for a kind of redemption!”
“A kind of redemption?” I could hardly believe what I was hearing.
“I think someone like you must have developed an unprecedented aversion to sex in childhood, just like Freud’s theory says, a person’s personality is determined in childhood.” He paused, as if expecting me to say something. But this time I didn’t respond, and listened quietly to what he was going to say.
“But you want to understand sex, but your experience, or rather your consciousness, tells you, no! You can’t be interested in this stuff, so you find a compromise: becoming a sex scholar. As for why you chose to become a sex crime psychologist, it’s probably because of your childhood experiences!”
“Where did you see that? I mean, why did you make that judgment?” I asked.
“From the look on your face when you asked me!” Chen Yizhi said with a smile, “No sex crime psychologist has ever maintained such a high level of interest in sex. You might not believe it, but I think you’re particularly interested in these kinds of stories, especially when you asked me about what it felt like to have sex in the T2000 just now. Your expression was just like that of a teenager who has just become interested in sex.”
I don't know what to say! I wanted to yell at him for talking nonsense, but I've always doubted what he said myself. Ever since I first met him—no! Ever before—I've felt that my attitude towards sex has always been ambiguous. But is it really true, as Chen Yizhi says, that all I've been pursuing is finding my own way out?
"Virtual reality sex is actually like drug addiction," Chen Yizhi broke my train of thought. "I think its prototype is probably like the 'Mirror of Love and Lust' in 'Dream of the Red Chamber'—you know it's dangerous, but you're already hopelessly addicted." Why did he only answer my question now?
“I think you shouldn’t jump to conclusions about my analysis just now. Like you, I used to have a kind of hostile feeling towards sex! Because I would fantasize about all sorts of girls, especially if they were pretty! Sometimes I could even see them naked. Of course, I felt ashamed of my attitude. At such a young age, I was thinking about women’s butts and imagining how exciting it would be to hug a woman.” He laughed at this point, and I laughed too. Men don’t seem to feel alone in this regard.
“But the more you suppress this feeling, the more it wants to burst out. You know, I was practically masturbating every day in middle school! But every time I masturbated, I always felt an unpleasant sense of guilt. I really felt like I was going to hell someday. And, not only did I hate my own behavior, I also felt very uncomfortable seeing those lecherous boys.”
“Standard defensive mechanism, a result of the subject-object conflict,” I quickly added.
“That’s right!” He nodded. “I realized after reading some books that this couldn’t go on.”
“But you’re not bad-looking! Girls should like you, right?” I said.
“That’s true, but I’m boring and timid.” He laughed again. “In high school, a few girls openly asked me to sleep with them, but I still didn’t dare. It’s funny, isn’t it? I think I’m probably very insecure! Later, I felt like I was masochistic. After asking others for help, I decided to give myself some space to indulge.”
“You bought this software?”
“That came later.” He said. “I was just trying to think about it from a different perspective. What kind of code does sex represent? I asked myself and others, is sex equivalent to sin?”
“And the answer?” I asked.
Chen Yizhi shrugged. "No, no answer. But given my personality, I wouldn't go around trying it out with a bunch of women! If I were, I would have done it already."
"So you bought the T2000!"
Chen Yizhi nodded. "But I didn't expect this action to get me into such big trouble."
"You mean the rape and murder charge?"
"Isn't that enough?" Chen Yizhi's tone became agitated. "I really didn't kill Yi Qingyu, I swear to God."
"But your descriptions of sex in your diary make it hard not to think so, and I asked the prosecutor who prosecuted you. He said the semen remaining in Yi Qingyu's body was definitely yours." I revealed what I knew.
Chen Yizhi's expression was as if he'd been hit over the head; he lowered his head and remained silent.
"Can you still say you're innocent?" I said, but I felt no sense of victory. I only felt pity for Chen Yizhi.
“I’m truly innocent. I don’t know why my semen was found at the scene; but I really didn’t rape Yi Qingyu.” Chen Yizhi still insisted on his innocence.
“But your semen was found at the scene!”
“Do you think I’d be stupid enough to leave such evidence? If I really did it, I’d already killed her, so why wouldn’t I be more thorough? Wouldn’t I have disposed of my semen? If the prosecutor told you everything, you should know they found the clue from the condom left at the scene. Would I be stupid enough to leave such important evidence at the scene so they could arrest me?”
“But how do you explain the appearance of this evidence?” I felt Chen Yizhi watched too much TV; he was actually using scenes from TV to defend himself.
“I’ve already said I don’t know!” Chen Yizhi shook his head frantically. Seeing him like this, I didn’t want to press him anymore. Anyway, I wasn’t a judge, and I was afraid he might do anything if he got agitated. “Let’s not talk about
this anymore. Even if I believed you, it wouldn’t matter; I’m not a judge.” I tried to change the subject, but Chen Yizhi didn’t react at all.
Chen Yizhi didn't answer the next few questions at all. He kept his head down, as if protesting something, or perhaps giving up on something.
"I think I'll come back another time," I said, getting up to leave. He still didn't look up.
On the way back to the research institute, I thought about Chen Yizhi's words today. Given his intelligence, he shouldn't have left any evidence against him at the scene. But the evidence was overwhelming, and he couldn't explain why his semen was there. Was it possible that the murderer was someone else, and that this person had somehow obtained Chen Yizhi's semen?
I immediately thought of sperm banks, but that seemed unlikely! Unless the person personally retrieved their own semen, no one, including the bank itself, had the right to take someone else's stored semen! Besides, I hadn't heard of any robberies at sperm banks. The
more I thought about it, the more confused I became. I couldn't think of any way to prove Chen Yizhi's innocence. But judging from Chen Yizhi's expression just now, he really seemed innocent. If he was truly innocent, wouldn't he be incredibly pitiful? Thinking of this, I decided to go and meet the police officers who arrested him.
As soon as I returned to the research institute, everyone swarmed around me.
"Gu Cheng, your lab is on fire!" These words almost made me faint. I rushed to my lab, where I saw several firefighters and part-time workers going in and out. From this angle, I could only see that the door to my lab was completely burned, and the walls near the door were blackened. A burnt smell lingered in the corridor.
I walked into my lab almost in a daze. Xiao Lin, H, and Director Yang were there too.
"Gu Cheng, we are very sorry that this happened..." H said immediately as he approached me.
"Are the data inside okay?" I was more worried about the data I stored in the lab.
"We don't know yet, Xiao Mao, but it's very likely that everything is destroyed,"
Xiao Lin said. I almost fainted when I heard that.
"What about Chen Yizhi's diary! All my research..." I was almost in despair.
"Calm down, Xiao Mao. Your research on your computer is still archived on the central server, so it's not a big deal yet. But some documents may have been destroyed. If you kept Chen Yizhi's diary in the research lab, then you'd better be prepared." Although Xiao Lin didn't give a definite answer, I seemed to understand something from his tone.
I stood there, stunned. Sigh! This fire came at just the right time. My years of hard work have been destroyed in an instant, especially Chen Yizhi's diary. From every perspective, it's a very important document. This fire has caused me too much loss. I think I need to find a place to lean on.
"Everyone is equally upset by this," Director Yang also spoke up:
"I didn't want this to happen either. You should rest well! I think this is good, Gu Cheng, I'll give you three days off so you can relax. What do you think?"
"Thank you, Director." Although Director Yang is usually a bit harsh, he was quite lenient with me today.
"That's settled then! Everyone, don't gather here anymore, go back to work!" Director Yang said as he led everyone back to their workstations. Now only Xiao Lin was still there.
"Like a weasel offering New Year's greetings to a chicken, he's up to no good." Xiao Lin said, sticking out his tongue as Director Yang walked away.
"Why say that!" I said, lifting a corner of the charred paper. Alas! All my efforts have gone up in flames.
“Actually, your loss is relatively small. Many files are already on the central server. The rest were just bad luck! You were just a little slow and didn't have time to save them to the central server.” Xiao Lin patted my shoulder. “Don't worry too much about it.”
“What I'm really heartbroken about is Chen Yizhi's diary. You know it's from my most recent case, and I was really invested in it.” I smiled brightly. “But today, everything is gone.”
“I can't say I understand how you feel, because my lab is fine, and I've never encountered anything like this before. I can only say, brother! Don't be like this. What's done is done, and no amount of regret will change anything.” Xiao Lin's words were truly insightful, and I laughed.
“Just go on vacation with that smile! You really need a few days off.” Xiao Lin said, and I nodded. Ah! I haven't had a long vacation in a long time.
Finally having a rare holiday, I decided to leave everything in Taipei. As for myself! I arrived in Kenting with a joyful heart. It had been a long time since I'd been here. Back when I was a student, I came almost every year, but after entering the research center, it had been a long time since.
Sitting alone on the beach, I thought about recent events. For some reason, I kept thinking about Chen Yizhi's words: "I think you're searching for redemption!"
Thinking about the questions he asked me that day, I'd always thought my views on sex were healthy. I believed the biggest difference between humans and animals lay in the control over sex. I firmly believed this was the driving force behind the evolution of human civilization.
But today, my thought system faced an unprecedented challenge. I found that my abilities couldn't explain the thought processes after abstinence. I seemed to feel that sex was equivalent to sin. But if that were true, then why do other people commit crimes every day, yet live happily like me? If sex really is sinful, then why do we humans always indulge in it? What kind of code does sex represent?
The answer is a volleyball! A volleyball completely disrupted my thoughts. I stared blankly at the volleyball that had hit my head.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." It was a girl's voice, a very sweet voice. I quickly looked up to see who it was, but what I saw disappointed me greatly. The girl wasn't very good-looking at all. Sigh! This is real life, I guess!
"Are you alright?" she asked.
"It's nothing!" I said, it was just a ball hitting me, and it really didn't hurt much.
"I saw you didn't seem to react at all when you were hit, I thought something was wrong!"
she said. Her words were quite amusing, so I decided to tease her a little.
"However, I think I might need to get checked out, because my head hurts a bit." I said this deliberately.
"Really!" the girl exclaimed, her expression filled with guilt and fear:
"What should we do? Should we take you to the doctor? We have a car..." As she said this, her friends had already gathered around. I realized I had made a rather unfunny joke, and I regretted it a little.
"It's not that serious! I think it'll be fine in a little while." I quickly said this, hoping to use this as an excuse to get away.
"How could we do that? How could our Hongren Society do such a thing? Sir, don't worry, we will definitely take full responsibility." The boy next to the girl said in an exaggerated way, which reminded me of my own school days.
"Which school are you from?" I asked curiously.
"We're all from the Chinese Language and Literature Research Institute of T University." They said almost in unison. I laughed when I heard that. The Chinese Language and Literature Research Institute of T University, that sounds quite plausible!
Wait! The Chinese Language and Literature Research Institute of T University! Isn't that the research institute that Chen Yizhi studied at? This piqued my interest.
"You're all from the Chinese Language and Literature Research Institute of T University, so do you know Chen Yizhi?" I regretted my words as soon as they left my mouth. The group's smiling expressions suddenly turned into extremely serious expressions, as if I had said something wrong. Then, without saying a word, they left my side. I was completely baffled because their reaction was really beyond my expectations.
But thinking about it again, it's not surprising that they reacted that way. " They must feel ashamed that their senior did something like that!
" the girl from before said. "Chen Yizhi is indeed my senior from the Graduate School of Chinese Medicine."
"Don't blame them, because it's not a very honorable thing," she added.
I nodded: "Of course I understand their feelings. If it were me, I might react even more strongly! I don't blame them at all." I said.
"That's good!" the girl said with a relieved expression.
"By the way, why did you want to ask about Senior Chen Yizhi?" she asked.
So I told her the whole story.
"Oh, I see." Lizhen said, her name was quite nice.
"He always thought he was innocent! What a coward.
We all feel sorry for Xiaoyu, she's always been a good girl." she said.
"Yi Qingyu has a very good reputation in the class!" I asked.
"Of course! She's the most talented girl in our class! And she's beautiful, it's really enviable." Lizhen said this with a look of longing.
"Oh, a woman like that probably doesn't have a man good enough for her!"
"I heard she has a boyfriend, someone she met recently, apparently at a lecture event organized by her club. I heard he's a lecturer!"
She spoke excitedly; everyone loves hearing gossip like this.
"What club?" I asked.
"I think it's called the Human Psychology Research Club! It's a very small club."
"I bet Chen Yizhi is probably a member too!" I said.
"Of course! This club was founded because of his charm. Chen Yizhi has always been very interested in psychology; he's the president of the club! But I never expected him to do something like this."
"So Yi Qingyu has a boyfriend!" I muttered to myself.
"That's just hearsay! Ah! I remember now, that teacher seems to be a researcher at a research center, I think... I really can't remember, I only remember his surname is Lin." Seeing her trying so hard to remember, I felt a little sorry for her. And frankly, I didn't think this was any particularly useful information.
After Lizhen left, I stayed alone on the beach looking at the stars. For some reason, I felt uneasy, as if something was about to happen. But under the starry sky, I couldn't see any signs.
Back in Taipei, I immediately went to the research center. I hadn't been back for three days; I wondered what it was like. Right! I wondered if my lab was fixed yet; I really wanted to see what it looked like.
As soon as I entered the lobby, I greeted everyone warmly. But everyone seemed a little awkward in their responses. I found it strange, but then I thought, I haven't seen everyone for three days. I rarely take vacations, especially such long ones; maybe they've become a little distant!
However, I found the atmosphere increasingly strange. Why did everyone become so unnatural around me? I found it increasingly odd; even after three days away, there was no need for such formality!
Reaching my research lab, I discovered that Xiaoqu was gone. By "gone," I mean the assistant's desk and everything else that used to be outside were completely vanished, as if they'd never been there. Just as I was wondering about this, Xiaoqu emerged from around the corner of the corridor, and I quickly called out to her.
"Xiaoqu! What happened?" I knew I clearly needed an explanation.
Xiaoqu's expression upon seeing me was exactly the same as everyone else's—no, it was even more exaggerated. She seemed reluctant to face me, stammering, "Brother Chen, you're back!"
"Yeah! I just got here." I smiled. "Could you tell me what happened? Where did your desk go?"
"Because I don't need it anymore!" Xiaoqu replied. Seeing my reaction, she quickly added, "Yesterday, Director Yang transferred me to the research and development lab. I'm H's assistant now."
"Not bad!" I laughed. "Now you have a chance to become a full-fledged researcher.
Keep it up!" I patted Xiaoqu on the shoulder.
“Brother Chen!” Xiao Qu looked strange, as if she wanted to say something but couldn’t bring herself to.
“What’s wrong? Is there something you want to tell me?”
“No.” She quickly shook her head, “Nothing.” I patted her head and was about to turn away when Xiao Qu called me back.
“You must have something on your mind, just say it! Don’t beat around the bush,” I said.
“Brother Chen, you’ll find out about this sooner or later, but I really don’t know how to say it.” Xiao Qu’s eyes were already brimming with tears.
“Just say it! Don’t cry! Did Ahao bully you?” I started to get anxious.
“No.” Xiao Qu shook her head, “It’s not my problem, it’s your problem.”
“My problem?” I exclaimed, “What happened to me?”
“You’ve been demoted!”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I’d been demoted!
“What do you mean?” I asked.
"Director Yang has demoted you to researcher. After the police investigation into the fire in the lab, it was found that your computer wasn't shut down, causing a system overload. The director believes you should take responsibility."
"How could this happen!" I shouted. "Xiaoqu, are you sure?"
"Xiaoqu is right!" I turned around and saw it was Xiaolin.
"Xiao Mao, what Xiaoqu said is true." Xiaolin's voice was low, but incredibly clear. I never expected this to happen to me. So this is the price of a three-day holiday. I feel like I've fallen from heaven to hell. No wonder everyone's expressions were strange earlier; I've been sidelined, and they're afraid of being implicated! I'm already looked down upon, and I'm still greeting people like this! Ha!
How ridiculous.
"Xiao Mao," Xiao Lin said, catching my shoulder. "I know you must be feeling really bad right now, just like us. Everyone was heartbroken when we heard the news, but things have come to this, and you have to accept it."
I didn't speak; I had no strength left to speak, and even if I did, I wouldn't know what to say.
"Xiao Mao, don't be like this," Xiao Lin said. "How about this, come sit in my office for a bit, have a cup of coffee to calm down, and then we can talk about this."
That was a good suggestion, so I nodded. "Then, Xiao Zhou, you can go back and get busy! I'll take care of things here," Xiao Lin gestured for Xiao Zhou to go back.
I saw Xiao Zhou nod, but as she left, it seemed like she wanted to tell me something. However, I didn't have the strength to pay attention to anything right now!
After arriving at Xiao Lin's room, I collapsed onto the sofa like a deflated balloon. This was probably the lowest point I had ever faced in my life. I sat there blankly.
“I told you long ago, that guy surnamed Yang has a problem.” Xiao Lin handed me a cup of coffee. “I knew it!
Why would he be so kind as to give you three days off!”
“System overload is our center’s problem! All this talk about shutting down the system is just a baseless accusation!” Xiao Lin said.
“What do you mean by that?” I asked.
“What I mean is that the director has disliked you for a long time. He’s been planning to replace the senior staff of the research center with his own people. Do you think Old Ma left? He was forced out by him. Otherwise, given Old Ma’s personality, he would definitely have worked until retirement.”
After Xiao Lin said this, I remembered that Old Ma used to say that “doing research is a lifelong career.”
“Now, someone that guy surnamed Yang cultivated has taken his place.” Xiao Lin shook his head. “Old Ma must be very unwilling.”
“What does this have to do with me?” I really couldn’t believe it.
“Xiao Mao!” Xiao Lin sighed, “Are you really clueless or just pretending? Your position is Chief Assistant, which is practically a senior researcher position. You’re already a candidate for senior administrative cadre, and your reputation within the center is high enough that everyone believes your future is limitless.”
Hearing such praise at this moment, I was filled with mixed emotions, unsure whether to feel sad or happy.
“You don’t need to feel embarrassed. You’ve always worked very hard, and everyone can see your dedication. But the problem is that you’re too dedicated. You don’t even consider the so-called office culture.”
“Because this isn’t an office! This is an academic unit, and what I need to do is conduct research! Is there anything wrong with that?” I asked, puzzled.
“You’re not wrong! But that’s how society is! People have their own selfish motives, whether in general organizations or academic institutions. We don’t just live in research reports! We live in the real world!
Xiao Mao, you’re too naive.”
“Even so, the director didn’t need to pull me down!” I increasingly couldn’t understand what Xiao Lin was saying.
“How could there not be? Someone like you could very well become an obstacle, because all you know is research. If we promote you to a senior position, we're afraid you're too inexperienced and will ruin our plans. If we don't promote you, we're afraid you'll harbor resentment. So we simply replaced you. I think that guy surnamed Yang will definitely try his best to get rid of you. Just wait and see,” Xiao Lin said with certainty.
After listening to Xiaolin's analysis, I was filled with rage. What did that guy Yang take the research center for? This is an academic institution, not a springboard for his personal ambitions! What a despicable fellow!
"Hey! Will you be in trouble?" I suddenly thought of Xiaolin's situation; this guy was a staunch anti-Yang supporter.
"Me?" Xiaolin laughed. "You're barely holding on yourself, and you're worried about my situation! Don't worry, someone like me who only knows how to have sex, the director won't care about me."
"Then I'm relieved! I think I need to talk to the director now." I prepared to get up and leave.
"You're not going to resign, are you?" Xiaolin looked very nervous.
"That depends on how my talk with him goes! But I probably won't be that impulsive; jobs are so hard to find these days! Right?" I said with a smile.
"That's good." Xiaolin said.
I waved and walked out of his research room. On my way to the director's office, I kept thinking about what Xiaolin had just said. I never imagined that I'd initially disliked working for a complex and treacherous large corporation, wanting to wholeheartedly pursue an academic career. I never expected it to be the same here! It's truly disheartening. It seems that wherever there are people, there is power struggle and backstabbing. I
only talked to the director for a few minutes before leaving. His usual smiling face made it hard to be angry. His reaction was vastly different from what I expected. I thought he would yell at me, acting like he was the boss. Instead, he looked so sad, as if he, not me, had been demoted. He kept apologizing, making me feel embarrassed. Only after leaving the room did I realize I had given in again. I think successful people probably all have this ability! They can easily implement their will while minimizing the backlash. I think I lack this ability, and I don't think I'll ever acquire it. Holding the keys to the new research lab in my hand, I was filled with mixed emotions.
Opening the door, I was truly disappointed by what I saw. It was much smaller and more rudimentary than my old research lab.
"What else do you want?" I asked myself, and couldn't help but smile bitterly. I sat down at my desk, and as soon as I turned on my computer, I found an email. I pressed the read button, and saw the following: "
The greatest betrayal often comes from the greatest trust!" From
Xiao Qu . It
was from Xiao Qu! What did this letter mean? Why would she write me such a cryptic letter?
After reading it, I had so many questions, so I contacted Xiao Qu.
"I've been waiting for your message," Xiao Qu said abruptly on the computer screen, which only confused me more.
"Why do you need to use email to contact me? You could use a communicator or come directly to my office!"
"Because it's inconvenient! Besides, I'm not your assistant anymore. H has very strict requirements for her subordinates, including not leaving their work stations without permission and not using communicators for personal matters. She would be very unhappy if she knew, and every time I dial a number, it's recorded! So I have to use email! It's very different for you to contact me directly than for me to contact you."
"Then you don't need to write this kind of letter! I don't understand what you're writing?"
"If I didn't write it like this, you probably wouldn't have come to find me so quickly, right?" she said, so quirky.
"You! You've watched too many movies and read too many novels! Do you think this is the X-Files?" I laughed: "Okay! Now you can tell me what you want to say!"
"What I'm about to say might be hard for you to believe, but I think I need to tell you."
Xiao Qu's expression became very serious.
"Can you not be so mysterious! You're making me nervous." I still found it very funny.
"Brother Chen, don't laugh at me! I'm very serious."
"Alright, alright, please go on." I suppressed a laugh.
"Okay, here's what happened. The day after your vacation, Director Yang convened a special meeting, mainly to review the responsibility for the fire in your lab. Because I'm your assistant, I also attended. Director Yang believes you should be held responsible and therefore wants to demote you. This opinion caused controversy at the meeting, with both sides arguing back and forth. In the end, Director Yang decided to resolve it by vote. I was sitting behind Xiao Lin, and I saw the red light on the 'yes' button on Xiao Lin's desk light up. Brother Chen, you should understand what I mean now," Xiao Qu said.
"You mean Xiao Lin betrayed me!" My heart nearly jumped out of my chest after hearing Xiao Qu's words.
"I just think Xiao Lin isn't very reliable! At the meeting the day before yesterday, he didn't say anything. I couldn't understand why he could remain silent. He's your good friend, but how could he be so calm when you're in trouble? So..."
"Enough! I don't want to hear anymore!" I stopped Xiao Qu.
“Brother Chen! I…”
“I’ve said enough!” I was almost collapsing. “Don’t say any more! I think I need to think this through. So much has happened since I got back.” After saying that, I turned off the screen.
What a long day! I just got back from vacation and found myself demoted and betrayed by a friend! I’m like Urashima Taro from a Japanese fairy tale!
Would Kobayashi really betray me? We’ve been friends for five years! How could he do this to me! Was our friendship all a lie? Were all those things he just said to me just to comfort me?
Thinking about his sorrowful expression just now, I felt like throwing up!
But he really had no reason to do this! It wouldn’t do him any good to bring me down, and we’re such good friends, we’ve helped each other so many times before. And Kobayashi isn’t usually like this! Could it be that the neighborhood lied to me? But why would she lie to me?
Ah! I can’t take this anymore.
"Gu Cheng, are you alright?" These words suddenly popped into my head. I looked up, following the sound, and saw it was H.
"I already knocked, but you didn't answer, and the door wasn't closed, so I came in. Sorry!" H explained.
"It's alright." I waved my hand. "Sit down! Don't be shy, would you like something to drink?"
"No, thank you." H sat down. "Actually, I brought you some bad news. Although I know it might not be the right time, but..."
"But I'll find out sooner or later, right? Humph, I've heard that so many times today. It's okay, just say what you have to say! I'm used to bad news today anyway." I interrupted H.
After hearing my words, H looked troubled.
"I'm sorry." I shook my head. "I apologize for my attitude. You know what happened to me today! So... please forgive me." I think my words just now probably made H feel a little flustered.
"It's okay. If I were you, I might have reacted more violently. It's just that I came at the wrong time."
"Don't say that." I felt a little embarrassed. "What bad news do you have for me?"
“Oh!” H paused. “The director has handed over Chen Yizhi’s case to me.”
“What did you say?” I stood up. “Is it because my lab caught fire?”
“Calm down and let me finish.” H raised her hands, gesturing for me to sit down. After I sat down, she continued, “I only found out yesterday. I didn’t want to take over your research because I know you’ve put a lot of effort into it. But you know the director; once he makes a decision, he won’t change it.”
“Why replace me?” I asked coldly.
“Because the director doesn’t trust you. And recently, someone has been saying you can’t do this research.”
H said, “And the director has always…” She suddenly stopped.
“Always what?”
“He never appreciated you.” H stammered.
“Ha, ha.” I laughed. “I knew that a long time ago.”
“I came because I felt I had to tell you my position, because I don’t want you to be angry with me,” H said.
"What's there to be angry about?" I said with a smile. "It's good this way! This case is quite troublesome, it saves me a lot of trouble."
"Gu Cheng, don't be like this, it's just a little setback. I believe the director will recognize your talent one day." H said these words sincerely, and I was somewhat moved.
"Don't be discouraged because of this, you know? It's because of your work attitude that I decided to work hard."
"What do you mean?" I didn't understand what H was saying.
"Nothing!" H stood up: "As soon as I entered this center, I was attracted by your seriousness. I hope you can maintain your seriousness, because I am very..."
"You are very what?" I still didn't understand what H meant, and her voice got softer and softer, so I didn't hear what she was saying at all.
But before I could ask her again, H had already left my room.
I didn't chase after her because I had too many questions to deal with. I felt so tired, so tired, I didn't want to stay here anymore. Since that was the case, I decided to leave now, since I didn't have anything else to do anyway.
After making up my mind, I immediately walked out of the research center. To avoid running into others, I specifically chose the exit from the underground parking lot, thinking I could avoid everyone. Unexpectedly, I bumped into H.
"Where are you going?" H, sitting in the TX5, rolled down the window and asked,
"Want a ride?"
"Haha!" I said awkwardly, "No...no need."
"If I remember correctly, there's still an hour until you get off work!"
"Anyway, I don't have anything to do! Besides, I feel really bored here!" I said.
"Oh, it's like this! Here's a suggestion: if you come with me to dinner, I won't tell on you, what do you think?" H's smile held a kind of mischievous kindness.
I opened the car door: "Looks like I have no other choice, right?"
"That's right!" H smiled brightly. Wow! That smile is so familiar! It's like I've seen it somewhere before. In an instant, this warm feeling made me temporarily forget everything that happened today.
We stopped at a barbecue restaurant in Tamsui. H kept patting his chest in the car, assuring me that the seafood at this barbecue restaurant was incredibly delicious.
After we sat down, H ordered without even looking at the menu, so it seemed she was a regular here.
"What were you thinking about in the car? You seemed so distracted." I felt a little embarrassed by H's question. "Nothing, I was just thinking about someone."
"Really!" H seemed very interested. "Who was it? A man or a woman?"
"A woman!"
"Oh, you came out with a woman, and you were thinking about another woman! You really know how to hurt women's feelings." H looked angry, but anyone could tell it was fake. However, she looked quite pretty, giving off a girl-next-door vibe.
"Why aren't you saying anything? I'm not angry! Don't be like that." H became nervous when I didn't speak.
"I'm not angry!" I quickly clarified. "I just feel like everyone has different aspects, different sides. Like you, at the research center, you seemed so shrewd and strong, intimidating; but today, here, I found you to be quite adorable."
"Oh!" H smiled, her sweet smile making my heart flutter.
"You haven't told me about that girl yet!"
"Hmm, how should I put it!" He thought for a moment, "She was a classmate I met in college. We all called her Xiaoyu. She was the most beautiful girl in our department! When she smiles, she has two little dimples, which makes her look very sweet, just like when you smile."
H chuckled, "You're quite the smooth talker! Did this girl give you any unforgettable memories?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Because I'm curious!" H lifted his bangs, "A girl who can make you so absent-minded must have more than just a sweet smile!"
I lowered my head and smiled bitterly, "I forgot you're a psychology PhD. That's right! She did give me some unforgettable memories. You might have guessed it already, she used to be my girlfriend."
"And then?"
"We dated for three months and then broke up." I smiled brightly, "That was short, wasn't it!"
"I know asking this question is... inappropriate, but to satisfy my curiosity..."
"I was the one who got dumped." Seeing her hesitant manner, I guessed that was probably what she wanted to know.
"Smart!" She gave me a thumbs up. "So, have you two taken things further? You know what I mean?"
If Kobayashi had asked this, I wouldn't have been surprised at all, but for this woman in front of me to ask it felt a bit outrageous!
"I don't understand your question?" I tried to play dumb.
"Come on! Stop pretending." H saw through my trick immediately. "I know this is a bit difficult for you to talk about. But don't misunderstand, I'm not the kind of person who likes to pry into other people's privacy.
It's just that a while ago, our center and the National Health Bureau conducted a joint study on the topic of sexual behavior among highly educated individuals. Because this study took a lot of my effort and energy, I still have some aftereffects.
Now, whenever I meet friends who have graduated from graduate school or above, I ask them about sex." She explained with a smile.
"How come I didn't know we were conducting this study? I haven't heard a word about it." H's words surprised me greatly.
"Because this study was conducted in secret. We didn't want the media to know to avoid trouble. And...
" H stopped and looked me over carefully.
"I'm telling you, don't tell anyone else, okay?" she said.
“Okay!” I usually hate hearing secrets, but I was so interested in this news that I agreed without thinking.
“The biggest reason we don’t want others to know is that in this study, we have to collect the semen of the participants,” H said softly.
“Why?” I didn’t understand why we needed to collect the participants’ semen.
“Our study is a systematic sampling of men with graduate degrees across the country.
We told these male participants that we need to examine their semen to find out the relationship between the sperm and the participant,” H said.
“I don’t see any connection. If we’re talking about genes and behavior, we don’t need to go to all this trouble. Has no one raised any questions?” I offered my opinion.
“Of course we have a story. And we—no, I should say they—don’t care about any connection! Because what we’re really doing is an artificial genetic experiment. We’ve already found the eggs, and of course, we also persuaded a group of highly educated women to donate their eggs.”
“You’re not going to do in-vitro fertilization, are you?”
“That’s right! We plan to breed a thousand eugenic babies and conduct follow-up studies, but if the public finds out, it might cause public pressure.” She took a sip of water: “The Health Bureau will certainly allocate a huge budget for this.”
“So Director Yang is naturally fully supportive.”
“That’s right!” H shrugged: “He’s more pragmatic.”
“How many people from our center are participating in this research?” I asked.
“Let me think. Hmm… Director, me, Ade, Junkai, Songhao, Xiaolin…”
“Xiaolin is also participating in this research?” I found it hard to believe.
“Yes!” H nodded. I really didn’t expect Xiaolin to participate in this experiment, and what surprised me even more was that Xiaolin hadn’t mentioned it at all. I'm such a close friend of his, yet he didn't even tell me, and instead, a woman I'm not very familiar with told me this news. It seems what the neighborhood told me today was highly credible.
"When did this experiment start?" I asked.
"Probably last month!"
"Last month! I remember, the last time the center sent a few people to France for a study tour..."
"That's right!" H said, "That study tour was actually a cover."
"I don't understand! If it's just about cultivating IVF babies, isn't a sperm bank a place where sperm can be collected?"
"No way! That would expose the whole thing. The law stipulates that if sperm stored in a sperm bank is to be removed, the depositor's consent is required; the bank cannot remove it without authorization. And even if these banks were willing, we wouldn't consider it because it would require a considerable cost, and if we couldn't reach an agreement, it would cause trouble." H's words made sense.
I see! Sigh, I never imagined a prestigious research center would do something so shady!
"You must feel very heartbroken!" H sensed my thoughts.
“Hmm.” I nodded. “I didn’t expect our research center to do something like this.”
“You wouldn’t…” H’s words trailed off, and I roughly knew what she wanted to say.
“Don’t worry, I won’t betray you. I’ll forget about it
once I hear about it,” I said. H nodded reassuredly. “By the way! You still haven’t answered me whether you’ve had sex with your girlfriend?”
Good heavens: she’s really persistent. I thought she had long forgotten about this question, and in fact, I really had.
“No!” I answered. “Really not!”
“Wow! Really! I didn’t expect you to be so innocent!” H’s tone was full of unpleasant disbelief, really! I felt mocked.
Actually, I had a chance. I wanted to go to the beach that summer during my junior year! That day, Xiaoyu and I were riding our motorcycles along the Danjin Highway at night, and when we got to Baisha Bay, it suddenly started raining heavily. We finally found a place to take shelter in the rain. It was an abandoned factory building, and Xiaoyu and I quickly took shelter inside.
It was past 1 a.m., and all we could hear in the factory dormitory were the sounds of cars on the Danjin Highway and waves crashing on the shore. Everything was so quiet, the atmosphere so beautiful.
I hugged Xiaoyu tightly, the feeling of that embrace like an electric current coursing through my body.
As if a powerful will was controlling me, I gradually lost control of the surging emotions within me, or rather, an impulse. This impulse reached the heart of my desire, and the raging flames almost engulfed me. I found my body trembling, not from fear, but from an overwhelming excitement.
My hands slipped inside Xiaoyu's clothes. Xiaoyu trembled slightly, offering little resistance. I simply turned Xiaoyu's face and kissed her forcefully.
With that kiss, the hormones in my body became uncontrollable! As our tongues intertwined, I gradually pressed Xiaoyu down, pinning her to the cold floor. Xiaoyu clearly felt uncomfortable.
"The floor is so hard and cold!"
"Oh, I see!" I said, "Then I'll put a jacket under you." I took off my jacket and placed it under Xiaoyu's body.
After Xiaoyu lay down, my lips pressed against her face and neck again, caressing her soft, fragrant breasts through her clothes.
I used my chin to push open Xiaoyu's shirt, pulling it inch by inch to her chest. My tongue roamed up and down along her cleavage, her two full breasts seeming ready to burst out from under her bra.
I swallowed, letting my tongue roam freely over her breasts. I licked and licked, but I still felt unsatisfied. So I simply pulled down her bra and played with her full breasts.
Xiaoyu's body twisted with the pressure of my hands on her breasts.
"Can you take it off?" I couldn't resist my desire. Xiaoyu nodded, her silent agreement invigorating me. I quickly took off her shirt, my hands enjoying the warmth of her body. I loved this contact; it felt like all my emotions melted away in it.
I pressed my body against hers, my heels spreading her legs. I writhed my body, letting every part of it enjoy the warmth.
My left hand gently moved to Xiaoyu's vulva, trying to imagine the wetness through her jeans.
Xiaoyu seemed to sense my audacity; her movements became even more intense, but she offered no resistance. So I boldly unzipped her pants. As soon as I pulled down the zipper, her full vulva, tightly bound by her panties, sprang out like a spring, forming a beautiful arc.
I gently stroked along this arc, and Xiaoyu's breathing became heavier. My hand moved along the edge of her panties, I tried to be as gentle as possible with my fingers, wanting this slight touch to penetrate deep into her bones. Sure enough, as I expected, Xiaoyu began to moan, and my fingers increased their pressure, penetrating deeper into her panties. As
soon as I entered, a viscous liquid clung to my fingers; it seemed Xiaoyu was already soaking wet.
I then unbuttoned Xiaoyu's jeans. But at that moment, Xiaoyu stepped over my waist, turned around, and pinned me down.
"I'm going to lick you," Xiaoyu smiled at me, and then actually took off my shirt, leaving me to her do as she pleased.
I saw her bury her head in my chest, and I felt a soft touch moving around my chest. When Xiaoyu's tongue circled my nipple, I felt a ticklish, tingling sensation, which made my body involuntarily shrink.
"Does it tickle?" Xiaoyu looked up and asked, and I shook my head.
"No, you're making me feel very comfortable," I said. Xiaoyu seemed satisfied with my answer; she continued her actions, and I maintained my tingling sensation. When she bit my nipple, a sharp pain jolted my entire nervous system, and every nerve began to contract. But after this pain, there was an unprecedented comfort.
I grabbed Xiaoyu's continuing movements with both hands, supported her under her arms, and lifted her up. Xiaoyu's lips pressed against mine again, in another passionate kiss. I suddenly realized that this contact of tongues brought a kind of intoxicating pleasure. It was as if our two souls melted into one in that instant.
I pulled down Xiaoyu's jeans, which she had only half-undone, and she was now completely naked. She straightened up, and my penis, now hard and erect, pressed tightly against her labia.
Xiaoyu's expression seemed to say, "Come on: I'm ready."
But at that moment, I had a sudden urge to back down, and a feeling of nausea. I sat up, looking dejected.
"What's wrong!" Xiaoyu asked, puzzled. I didn't know either! I didn't know what to say.
"Hey!" H's voice pulled me out of my reverie: "What's wrong? If you really don't want to answer, that's fine. I just thought it was fun, just looking for a topic."
I gave a bitter smile. Actually, I really wanted to talk to someone about my thoughts, or rather, to talk to a psychologist about my pathological state. I think H is definitely qualified, but she's a woman. If I weren't completely without options, I probably wouldn't consider talking to H.
I changed the subject, and H stopped pressing the issue. Aside from that topic, I got along quite well with H in other areas.
Actually, H is a really nice girl—smart, generous, and makes people feel comfortable.
I enjoyed our meal quite a bit. After the meal, we were still chatting, so we decided to go to a pub on Fuxing South Road that she was familiar with to continue our conversation.
"By the way, I have a question for you. Did the center hold a meeting a few days ago regarding the responsibility for the fire?" I wanted to verify with H whether what Xiao Qu said was true. I probably still hoped that Xiao Qu was wrong and that Xiao Lin was still on my side.
"The last meeting!" H thought for a moment: "Yes, there was a meeting! It was at that meeting that the director decided to demote you."
"Did anyone object to the director's proposal at that meeting?" I tried my best not to let H realize the real reason for my question.
"There were quite a few people!" H said. "That day, it seemed like everyone was divided into two factions. One faction thought you should take responsibility, and the other thought it had nothing to do with you."
So far, H's words didn't differ much from what Xiao Qu had said.
"Was there anyone who particularly supported me?"
"Pretty much! But Xiao Qu did say a lot for you!"
Hearing H say this, I couldn't help but feel warmed by Xiao Qu's sincerity.
"What about Xiao Lin? He should be similar to Xiao Qu, right?" I thought I was pretty good at getting information out of him.
"Him? I didn't pay attention, but as far as I can remember, he didn't seem to say anything. But I think that's impossible. He's such a good friend of yours, I think he must have said something for you, maybe I just didn't notice! Why are you asking this?" H's words made my mood plummet, so I ignored her last question.
"You want to know who sided with you and who sided with the director in the meeting the day before yesterday, right?"
I smiled wryly. "I just want to figure out who my true friends are!"
"But Gu Cheng, I don't think it's meaningful! Because in that situation, not everyone has the courage to stand up for anything. Besides, everyone's perspective is different. Maybe some people think friendship is one thing, and facts are another. Some people just think we should stick to the facts!" H said.
"I know," I replied calmly.
"If you really want to know, I have the meeting minutes from that day; you can take a look."
H's tone was helpless; she probably didn't agree with my thoughts. I didn't want to discuss this topic anymore. Anyway, she wouldn't understand.
We continued talking about other things. This was the first time I drank more than my usual amount, and H was also quite a drinker; we had already drunk almost two dozen beers!
I don't know if it was because of the alcohol or because I always thought so, but I thought H was really beautiful.
I reached out and held H's hand: "I think you're quite beautiful," I frankly stated my opinion.
H lowered her head after hearing this: "Why would you say such a thing?"
I felt that although she spoke in a blaming tone, there was a hint of sweetness in it.
"I'm telling the truth." I don't know where she got the courage from: "I think I really like you!"
H lowered her head even further, but I vaguely saw a smile in her lowered expression.
"Actually, I like you too, but we can't be together." H's answer after raising her head was both heartbreaking and worrying.
"Is it related to Director Yang?" My intuition told me that my worry was about Yang Zhihong, because I had heard a long time ago that she had some ambiguous relationship with Director Yang.
"I think you've known about this for a long time, haven't you?"
"Are you really with him?" I couldn't believe that H really knew what the rumors said was about Yang Zhihong's woman.
"That's right!" H nodded: "I've been with the director since the research institute."
"Do you like him?"
"At first, I did like him." H's words revealed some mystery.
"And now?"
H shook her head: "Don't ask anymore. Anyway, knowing won't change anything, and some things are better left unknown." After saying this, H got up and left, leaving me stunned in my seat.
I regretted my impulsiveness just now. How am I going to face people tomorrow after saying all this?
Sigh! Really.
(V)
The next morning, I walked nervously into the research center. I don't know if it was God playing a trick on me, but as soon as I entered, I saw H coming towards me. I felt like my heart was about to stop. I stood there, frozen, watching H walk over.
"So early today!" H said with a smile: "Take good care of yourself and adapt well to your new job!"
Seeing her like this, I did breathe a sigh of relief and immediately gave her a warm smile in return.
"Didn't you want to see the meeting minutes from that day? You can come to my office later," H said softly as he walked over to me.
It seems I really do get nervous too easily; H doesn't seem to care at all! When I got to the office, I found my door was already open.
"Xiao Mao! So late?" It was Xiao Lin. My previously high spirits immediately plummeted.
"What's wrong? Why do you look so unhappy?" Xiao Lin looked surprised. Actually, he wasn't wrong; I was indeed unhappy.
"You're not still upset about yesterday, are you? Sigh, a real man should just laugh off setbacks. Why take it to heart? Okay, I specially brought you breakfast. Eat something, see if it makes you feel better."
I felt incredibly disgusted watching him talk to himself. I really wanted to tell him that I wasn't upset about yesterday; I was upset about his behavior. Making me feel better was easy!
Just keep your distance from me.
Xiao Lin probably noticed the displeasure on my face. He stood up somewhat awkwardly.
"What happened? Since you walked in, all I've seen is your face looking like you've had a mess."
I didn't want to argue with him now: "Nothing!" I deliberately stretched: "I didn't sleep well last night, I'm a little tired today!"
"Is that so?" Xiaolin didn't seem satisfied with my answer: "Okay then! I'll leave breakfast here, I won't bother you anymore."
Xiaolin's tone was clearly unhappy, and I felt bad about it too. I never imagined that such a good friend would become so awkward.
After Xiaolin left, I found myself lost in thought. Usually at this time, I should be reading materials or writing reports, I should be very busy! I shouldn't be so bored as to daydream like this. I sighed, thinking about the meeting minutes at H's place.
I should go find H! I thought to myself, also wanting to gauge her reaction to yesterday's events. Although she seemed indifferent just now, I still felt uneasy.
Reaching H's office, I suddenly felt a pang of fear. I stood at the door of her lab, but I didn't have the courage to knock.
"Looking for me?" a voice came from behind me—it was H! I quickly turned around.
"You didn't come to use the restroom, did you?" H's smile dispelled my apprehension.
"No! I came to see the meeting minutes."
"Looks like you really think this is important." H said, opening the door. "Come in and we'll talk!"
Entering H's lab, she turned on her computer. "Here! The entire meeting proceedings are here. Take your time looking at them!"
I went to H's desk and focused intently on the screen. Everyone seemed to be arguing, but I couldn't hear any sound.
"Can I turn on the speakers?" I asked.
"Sure! But you'll have to wait a bit, because it needs to be accessed through the central archive management program."
"No problem, I'll wait." I waved my hand, indicating I didn't mind. It was standard procedure.
After a while, I heard a commotion in the meeting room, with one voice standing out. I stared at the screen and realized it was Xiao Lin. Seeing her impassioned speech on my behalf, I was truly moved.
A moment later, I turned my attention to Xiao Lin. He appeared silent on the screen, but his position was too far away for me to see his expression. So I put on the light-up hood and touched Xiao Lin's face. Xiao Lin's figure was circled, and a menu appeared. I selected 3x5 magnification, and the computer screen quickly zoomed in on Xiao Lin's face. I then realized that Xiao Lin's face was incredibly cold, even carrying a murderous intent—a look of wanting to destroy everything. I felt like I'd seen that look somewhere before.
However, I couldn't discern his opinion on the matter from the meeting; I could only say he simply hadn't spoken up for me. At that moment, I suddenly felt my previously hardened heart soften.
I realized I was making excuses for Xiao Lin. Actually, I had already found them; he was probably just looking for an opportunity! He wanted to find an opportunity to speak up for me, but he felt the timing wasn't right.
Although this incident somewhat affected my friendship with him, we've been friends for so many years, and I didn't want this misunderstanding to damage my friendship with Xiaolin, especially if it was just a misunderstanding.
"What's wrong? You seem lost in thought!" H brought me a cup of coffee.
"Nothing!" I took her coffee. "I was just thinking about how many years Xiaolin and I have been friends."
My tone was wistful.
"Yes!" H said, leaning against the table next to me. "So we should cherish it even more!"
"That's probably true!" I stretched. "I was just thinking that maybe it wasn't a misunderstanding, maybe Xiaolin has his own reasons."
"That's exactly right!" H patted my head. "You only realized it now? It's been over ten hours too late."
I laughed. "Sorry, I'm not very good at it."
H suddenly hooked her arm around my neck and leaned against me, which startled me.
"What's wrong! Didn't you say you liked me yesterday?" H's voice was sweet and coquettish.
“But… didn’t you say…” I hesitated.
“That was yesterday!” H laughed. “I think we…” H suddenly stopped talking, as if she had thought of something, and she let go of my hands.
“What’s wrong?” I became a little nervous. Would I ruin this good atmosphere?
“Nothing.” H’s tone was indifferent. “I just feel that this is not fair to you.”
“I don’t understand? I don’t know anything, how can I talk about fairness or unfairness?” I didn’t understand what H meant by saying that.
“Do you want me to be with you only part-time? Or do we have to become the kind of people who can’t be seen in public? Don’t you really mind what happened between me and Yang Zhihong?” H became a little agitated.
"Don't get so agitated," I tried to calm H down. "Let's take it one step at a time.
First, I don't mind your relationship with Yang Zhihong; that's your past. I won't care what you did before. Second, you said we'd become someone we can't be seen in public! Let me tell you, I won't let that happen. Since we're together, we should be open and honest. We've done nothing wrong, so why should we be sneaking around?"
"You're too naive!" H quickly interrupted me. "Yang Zhihong won't agree to let me leave him; if I leave him, he'll use all his power to destroy us. You may not believe me, but I've been around him for too long, and I've seen countless examples. You don't know how terrifying he is, and he definitely has the power to do so."
I felt speechless because H was absolutely right. I had forgotten my biggest rival, Yang Zhihong. He was powerful and influential, and in terms of strength, he could absolutely crush me. I had forgotten that I was the one challenging him.
I suddenly felt useless, lacking even the courage to face such a situation.
“But I still like you quite a bit.” H hugged me. “We can only wait!”
“Wait!” I repeated H’s words. It seemed this was the only way.
Suddenly, a shout came from outside the door: “H! Open the door, it’s me, Zhihong!”
It was him! I stood up in surprise, my heart pounding with nervousness.
“I think I should leave now.” I prepared to walk towards the door.
“Wait, you can’t go that way!” H called out to me, her voice low, as if she didn’t want Yang Zhihong to see me.
“Why?” I was a little angry because I felt looked down upon.
“Yang Zhihong will get suspicious. You hide first, I’ll explain later.”
I had no choice but to obey H and hide in the metal cabinet behind her desk.
“Why did it take you so long to open the door?” Yang Zhihong complained as soon as he entered.
“No!” H replied casually, “I was in the bathroom just now!”
I could see through the crack that H’s expression was full of tension.
Yang Zhihong approached the desk. Oh no! My coffee was still on the table; H had forgotten to put it away. I was afraid Yang Zhihong would become suspicious if he saw it, but judging from where his gaze was fixed, he probably already noticed.
"Why are there two cups of coffee on the table? Was someone here just now?" Oh no! He really did notice.
"Just now… I asked Xiao Qu to have coffee with me, you know! Eating breakfast alone seems a little strange." H's lie wasn't very clever.
"Really?" Yang Zhihong seemed to believe H quite a bit.
"By the way! Why did you come to see me?" H asked.
"Why?" Yang Zhihong's tone was strange: "What do you think? We haven't done 'that' in a long time…"
I could imagine his expression without even looking! He must be like those perverts on TV, drooling and staring at women.
"Here? Now? That's not a good idea!" H feigned surprise.
"What does it matter?" Yang Zhihong approached H: "It's not like it's the first time we've been here." As he spoke, his hand reached for H's chest, and H took a few steps back.
"I don't want to now, let's talk about it tonight, okay?" H's expression was somewhat aggrieved.
“I want it now!” Yang Zhihong grabbed H. “I can’t wait until tonight. I have a meeting. Don’t waste my time, and…” Yang Zhihong laughed, “You always say no, but afterwards you’re more satisfied than anyone else.”
H lowered her head and didn’t speak. I think she must be very sad. I never imagined that the director of the research center would treat women as tools of lust.
Yang Zhihong lowered his head and kissed H. H didn’t offer any obvious resistance, but she felt quite helpless against Yang Zhihong’s right hand on her thigh. She held Yang Zhihong’s hand tightly, as if afraid that he would do something else.
Our Director Yang’s left hand wasn’t idle either. I saw him moving up and down on her back, and after a while, he slipped inside H’s shirt. H quickly grabbed his hand; Yang Zhihong’s left hand didn’t work, so he switched to his right. He moved upwards forcefully, and although H caught his hand, it was useless. Yang Zhihong’s hand slipped inside H’s tight skirt. From this angle, it was obvious that he slid in from the inside.
H bent over, her hands trying to stop Yang Zhihong, but she was too late. Yang Zhihong had already lifted her skirt completely, revealing H's off-white panties in a high-cut style. My heart skipped a beat. Yang Zhihong lifted H onto the table, and H's two pink legs kicked wildly in mid-air.
This was the first time I had seen H's complete lower body curves. Her thighs were even more beautiful than I had imagined, bright and alluring under the tight stockings, as if they were glowing.
I felt a tightness in my lower body! As if something was trying to break free, making me feel so uncomfortable.
But what made me even more uncomfortable was how could I have such a reaction: H was being bullied by a beast! How could I have such lewd thoughts?
The two of them struggled violently on the table, and H slapped Yang Zhihong hard across the face. The slap was clearly very solid, and the whole room seemed to shake.
“I said I didn’t want it!” H pulled her skirt up and jumped down.
“Damn it!” Yang Zhihong’s eyes suddenly flashed with malice: “You bitch!” He lunged forward and slapped H back, sending her crashing against the wall. Yang Zhihong then ripped off her clothes.
H tried to resist, but Yang Zhihong pulled out a pair of handcuffs from his pocket and, after a struggle, cuffed H’s hands to the table leg. He quickly pulled off H’s tight skirt and unhooked her bra. H shook her body desperately, trying to put up a last stand. But all her efforts came to an abrupt halt when Yang Zhihong pulled out his penis and inserted it into her vagina. H’s high breasts were at Yang Zhihong’s mercy, being nibbled and kneaded. Her open thighs were tightly covered by Yang Zhihong’s moving penis. I saw him, like a madman, his eyes rolling back, thrusting into H’s body again and again.
I couldn't see H's expression, but I believed she was in pain because she kept her head turned away the whole time, as if to hide it from me.
I felt so much pain! On one hand, because H was being ravaged by that beast surnamed Yang right before my eyes; on the other hand, I was experiencing a feeling even better than before. I couldn't help but reach into my pants and start masturbating. This was the first time I had ever done this, or rather, the first time I had ever performed the action completely.
The back-and-forth rubbing felt wonderful. I kept imagining what it felt like to have sex with H, until I ejaculated. The feeling reached a peak of satisfaction, like reaching a critical point in physics. My desires awakened at that moment, and as the semen clung to the metal, the shiver running through my body gave me a sense of liberation.
But waking up from this heavenly feeling was painful because when I looked up and opened my eyes, I saw the expression on that beast surnamed Yang's face, and I felt utterly deserving of death. The thought that my expression might have been the same as Yang Zhihong's filled me with self-loathing. Looking at the white liquid on my hand, I disgustedly took out a tissue and wiped it off.
Yang Zhihong finally finished. As he left, he spat disdainfully onto H's naked body,
muttering, "You slut, did you enjoy it? Damn it, do you only feel pleasure after this every time? You're such a slut." After saying that, he strode away.
I waited for him to leave for a while before coming out of the metal cabinet.
"There's another set of clothes in the cabinet upstairs, could you please get it for me?" H said, pointing to the area behind me, her voice remarkably calm.
I retrieved a clean suit for her as she requested. H took it and headed towards the bathroom. Her expression was so calm, so calm that it didn't seem like she had just been raped.
My feelings right now can only be described as complicated.
H stayed inside for a long time. I could understand how much this had hurt her, so I didn't knock or disturb her. But I couldn't leave at this point either, even though my presence might embarrass her. I decided to stay anyway.
I sat down at H's desk. Since she had already opened the central archives management program, I figured I might as well check out our research center's website. Actually, using someone else's account to access the internet isn't ideal, but because H is a senior manager, she can access previously restricted areas due to access restrictions. I've wanted to try this for a long time.
The first file I accessed was the research H mentioned last time, something I've always been very curious about. I first looked at the sample size and sampling method. The computer quickly listed all the data for the population.
Wow! Sure enough, they were all graduate students.
T University's Graduate Institute of Chinese Medicine! Seeing this place suddenly gave me an idea. I opened the T University Graduate Institute of Chinese Medicine's interviewee list, and the computer immediately listed all the interviewees, and as I expected, Chen Yi-zhi was indeed among them. And the record in this file showed that Chen Yi-zhi had donated semen. So there must be other ways to obtain Chen Yi-zhi's semen without his knowledge and use it to frame him.
But who would do that? There are hundreds of people involved in this study! And this is just my speculation; to confirm it, I need to know if Chen Yizhi's sample is missing from the collected semen. Only then can this hypothesis stand. So my first step was to find out who was managing the semen.
I really don't know whether to be happy or sad about this result! Because I discovered that the person managing the semen was actually Xiaolin. Now I faced a choice. It's not that I have to apologize to Xiaolin for this case; I was going to apologize to him anyway for what happened this morning. It's just that if I ask him for help, the study might be exposed, which would ruin Xiaolin's future. If I can prove Chen Yizhi's innocence, that's fine; I can use Xiaolin's help to clear Chen Yizhi's name as a reason to let Xiaolin atone for his sins and then push the whole thing onto Yang Zhihong. But what if I can't? I can't do that. But if I don't find out the truth, I'll feel like I've let Chen Yizhi down. Because so far, it's very likely that what he said wasn't a lie.
After a while, I came up with a plan. If I connected to Kobayashi's computer, I might find some clues without causing trouble for Kobayashi. I thought that as H, I should be able to connect to the computer in Kobayashi's lab, so I started trying to connect.
But I failed; it turned out that everyone's computer was protected. I leaned back in my seat, somewhat disheartened. However, this was to be expected; everyone's right to privacy should be respected. If superiors could arbitrarily access their subordinates' computers, wouldn't that infringe on individual rights?
I smiled and logged off the network, returning to the original screen. H happened to come out of the restroom, and I immediately got up to greet her.
"You're still here?" H looked surprised. But her surprise couldn't hide her thick nasal voice; it seemed she had just had a good cry, her eyes were swollen. Seeing this, I felt really sad.
H walked to the desk and sat down. She opened the file: "You should have finished reading it by now! If there's nothing else, I think you can leave."
Faced with her indifference, I understood.
“I want to stay here with you!”
“I’m not that fragile. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened; I’m used to it.” H’s tone was so indifferent that it was hard to tell what she was really feeling.
“But…” I couldn’t finish my sentence.
“Don’t say that.” H lowered her head. “You saw what happened! You should understand how powerless we are under power. But don’t misunderstand, I’m not blaming you for not stopping Yang Zhihong’s actions. It was right of you not to. I was praying that you wouldn’t act impulsively. I just realized something in the bathroom: even if we’re together, it won’t change anything. We’re just sacrifices to power. We can’t do anything about it, so why make each other suffer?”
I didn’t say anything because H was absolutely right. Since I hadn’t stood up for H earlier, I couldn’t say anything now. The thought made me feel ashamed.
“Don’t be like that.” H’s tone softened a bit. “It’s because of my health that Yang Zhihong promoted me to a high-ranking position. I know that very well, otherwise this position should be yours.”
“Don’t think like that!” I was a little taken aback by H’s frankness.
“Actually, you’re in a very good position! I think everyone is absolutely certain of your abilities,” I said.
“You don’t need to lie to me. I know what everyone is thinking. Don’t think I’m stupid. Many people talk about me behind my back as a prostitute, right? Even you look down on me.”
“I don’t look down on you,” I argued loudly. “I’ve always admired your abilities.”
“Okay! At least you don’t like me as a person, right?”
I couldn’t deny that I used to dislike him quite a bit.
“I can’t deny what you said, but that was then! I didn’t know you very well back then, and besides, you took the position that should have been mine, of course I was furious! And it was an unknown woman, what’s more, she was just an ordinary researcher who had only been here for three months.
I was really angry back then!”
“And then what happened?” H smiled.
“After that! Actually, my feelings for you have always been very complicated. On one hand, I prayed every day that you would make a mistake soon, but on the other hand, I hoped that you could help the center’s future. Now I admire you but I’m also jealous! Pretty complicated, right?”
“Then you must have been in a lot of pain!”
“It’s okay! People always live in contradictions.” I said, and H laughed loudly after hearing that. Seeing her smile, I couldn’t help but laugh too.
“Thank you!” H stopped laughing and said softly, “I feel much better! Thank you, really!”
“It’s nothing.” H’s thanks made me a little embarrassed: “I just… you know! I didn’t want to…” Oh my god! I couldn’t say anything.
“I know what you mean. Thank you.”
“Okay! I’m relieved to see you’re alright. I’ll be going now.” I walked to the door, and H nodded at me with a smile.
So I left H’s room. I started thinking about how to persuade Kobayashi to help me. But in any case, I wanted to see Chen Yizhi first and tell him my thoughts. He would be very happy because after waiting for so long, someone finally believed what he said.
“I think I should clarify one thing first: my identity today is that of a friend, not a researcher.” I told Chen Yizhi my position as soon as I saw him.
“Oh!” He seemed quite surprised: “Then what do you want to talk to me about?” Friend?
“Hmm!” I hummed casually: “Don’t talk to me like that, I’m serious.”
“I really want to know why?”
“Because I was transferred!” I said this somewhat unnaturally because I didn’t want him to know that I had been demoted, so I found a word that could explain it.
“So your visit has nothing to do with your research plan!”
Chen Yizhi’s eyes widened, his expression full of surprise.
“Absolutely right!” I said.
"Thank God! I'm finally free from this damn research."
"Don't be too happy yet, because this research didn't stop because of my departure; someone else has taken over." I poured cold water on Chen Yizhi's enthusiasm.
Chen Yizhi leaned back in his chair, disappointed. "Sigh! I'm a dying man anyway, can't everyone just let me face death in peace?"
"What!" I was a little surprised. "When was the verdict announced?"
"A few days ago! Didn't you read the newspaper?" Chen Yizhi's voice was lazy. I remembered, I was in Kenting a few days ago, oblivious to worldly affairs! No wonder I didn't know.
"I'm here to tell you something. I've discovered a way to prove your innocence!"
Chen Yizhi jumped up when he heard me say this. "What did you just say? You can prove I'm innocent! Really?"
"Don't ask so many questions yet, calm down and listen to me."
Chen Yizhi immediately stopped talking, staring intently at me, so I told him what I had discovered.
"You mean someone stole my semen and used it to frame me?" Chen Yizhi looked incredulous.
"I mean, it's possible!" I said, "But first I need to confirm if your sample is missing from the semen collection managed by Xiaolin."
"I never imagined that all that supposed research was a scam! What's worse, I was used and ended up hurting myself because of it." Chen Yizhi's teeth were grinding.
"That's just my deduction! Whether it holds true depends on whether a sample is actually missing. Maybe you're lying to me," I said.
"Then I urge you to investigate right away!" Chen Yizhi roared, "You'll find I'm innocent."
"I will investigate!" I said, "If you're really not the murderer, the law will naturally give you justice!"
I stood up to leave.
"Wait a minute!" Chen Yizhi called after me.
"Who is this Xiaolin you just mentioned?" Chen Yizhi asked. This sudden question caught me off guard.
“Oh! Xiao Lin! He’s from our research center! He’s a good friend of mine.” After a while, I answered as if I suddenly remembered something.
“Why are you asking this?” I was a little confused. Was this question important? Why would Chen Yizhi suddenly ask me this?
“Because this name sounds familiar! I met a psychology teacher outside before! We also called him Xiao Lin, and his name is Lin Yuxiang.” Chen Yizhi said.
“Lin Yuxiang!” What a coincidence! “My friend’s name is Lin Yuxiang!”
“Did he graduate from the Psychology Research Institute of A University?” Chen Yizhi asked, and I nodded quickly.
“He works at the research center now?”
“Didn’t I say? He’s my friend! Of course, he works with me!”
“Then the Lin Yuxiang we know is the same person!” Chen Yizhi said with a smile, “I didn’t expect to hear his name again under these circumstances.”
Wait a minute! When I was in Kenting, I heard Chen Yizhi’s junior say that Yi Qingyu had a boyfriend surnamed Lin. They met because he had taken a class in their club, and now he’s a researcher. Could this person be Xiao Lin?
"Tell me, did Lin Yuxiang ever take classes in your club?" I asked.
"Yes! He was even our club's advisor!" Chen Yizhi said. "If it weren't for that incident, we'd probably still be good friends."
"What incident?" I asked. But Chen Yizhi seemed reluctant to answer.
"Fine! If you don't want to talk about it, I won't force you." I paused. "I heard from your junior that Yi Qingyu had a boyfriend, and that boyfriend was supposedly a researcher, and in..."
"Don't say any more." Chen Yizhi slammed his fist on the table, his expression full of anger. "You guessed right, Lin Yuxiang is Xiaoyu's boyfriend."
Lin's romantic relationships are getting more and more complicated! I never imagined he and Yi Qingyu had such a past. It seems I need to re-evaluate my previous understanding of Lin.
"Don't be so angry." I thought about how much he loved Yi Qingyu in his diary, and I knew he couldn't accept the fact that Yi Qingyu had been taken away by someone else.
"I'm sorry," Chen Yizhi said, his voice like a deflated balloon. "I didn't scare you, did I?"
"Anyway, I'm used to it now," I said, and Chen Yizhi laughed.
"I think I'll do everything I can to find out the truth, but that doesn't mean I believe you." I saw his emotions had calmed down; it was time to leave.
Chen Yizhi bowed to me. "Thank you. No matter the outcome, you're the first person to take my words to heart. Thank you."
His gesture reminded me of something. I took a pack of cigarettes from my pocket and tossed it in front of me.
"I didn't know what brand you liked, so I just bought a random one. It's best if you don't like it. Smoking is bad for your health, smoke less."
Chen Yizhi clutched the pack like a child. Although he didn't say anything more, I knew he was very grateful for my gesture.
After leaving the meeting room, I went straight to find Xiaolin. On the way, I kept thinking about why I wanted to help Chen Yizhi. I wondered if it was because, as he said, we were the same type of person, and perhaps from the moment I first encountered his diary, I didn't really think he was a bad person! Although I'd only talked to him a few times, and although he made me very angry during those conversations, I felt he wouldn't be the kind of criminal who would rape and murder.
This perception, in fact, couldn't withstand the test of reasoning, but I trusted my intuition. And right now, the most important thing was to prove that my intuition wasn't wrong.
After arriving at the research center, I barged into Kobayashi's lab like the wind.
"Kobayashi, are you free right now?" I opened his door without even knocking. But this rash action immediately made me regret it; I should have knocked first, because Kobayashi was busy making love.
The scene before me was a naked woman lying on Kobayashi's desk, her legs wrapped around his waist, and Kobayashi, who had only taken off his suit pants, was holding her, standing on the edge of the desk. Obviously, they had stopped because of my sudden visit.
His eyes were wide open, as if he couldn't believe someone had just barged in like that. Of course, I felt embarrassed. Just as I was about to leave, the woman quickly stood up. That's when I saw her face, and I almost fainted. Wasn't that Wenwen? The most well-behaved girl in the entire center! She was even my classmate in graduate school! I never imagined Xiaolin would actually sleep with her. Wow, this was beyond embarrassing.
Besides embarrassment, I also felt a pang of resentment, because Wenwen had been my first sexual fantasy.
Back then, Wenwen was the undisputed beauty of our class, a very well-behaved girl. She was the kind of student who was never late for class, and whose notes were neater and more beautiful than anyone else's. For me, she was an important object of my sexual fantasy.
Of course, I struggled a bit in the process of making her the object of my sexual fantasies. After all, she was so pure. Wenwen never made herself as provocative as the girls in the other classes; she was always clean and tidy. But for some reason, I had an urge to strip her clothes off and devour her body, which was bound by rules and regulations. But when I thought about this, I felt that I was too evil to have such lewd thoughts about a woman who was like a goddess.
But the more I thought about it, the less my body responded. I felt my crotch begin to bulge, and my imagination flowed along with my hot semen.
I saw Wenwen lying naked on the bed. With all her inhibitions removed, she looked incredibly beautiful. Her whole body appeared slightly dark and healthy on the white sheets. Her long hair, which always hung down, was scattered on the pillow, radiating towards the head of the bed, pointing directly at my eyes. Her slender waist supported her alluring breasts, the areolas glowing with a pinkish luster, glimpsed faintly within Wenwen's embracing arms. Her long legs displayed the most primal and powerful arc of life on the bed, and between their intertwined thighs bulged the woman's most secret place—the man's oasis.
Like a tree trunk uprooted by the wind, I collapsed weakly onto Wenwen's body, every pore on my skin opening wide, devouring the woman beneath me. I noticed that Wenwen's expression on the bed was as dignified as it was in class, but as my movements intensified, her expression began to change noticeably, sometimes pleasurable, sometimes painful. But no matter the expression, Wenwen kept her lips tightly closed, and I thrust even harder.
"Scream! Shout out your pleasure!" My inner cry echoed with every movement.
Finally, Wenwen began to moan softly, which filled me with immense pride, as if I had conquered something. My movements became more exaggerated, Wenwen's expressions became more varied, and of course, her voice too; the whole scene was like a Japanese AV film.
A Japanese AV film! This was my first sexual fantasy, and I remember it very clearly.
It happened after watching a Japanese AV film, when Wenwen came to get my notes, but I managed to control my desire, and afterwards I punished myself by taking cold showers for a week.
But today's scene really surprised me. I stood frozen at the door until Xiaolin pushed me.
"What are you standing there for! Everyone's gone!" Xiaolin closed the door: "You came at just the right time! I didn't even get to enjoy myself! You just ruined my orgasm! You're something else." Xiaolin gave me a thumbs up, her tone full of admiration. I scratched the back of my head, not knowing what to say. I remembered a few days ago when my neighbor saw her dog being ridden by another stray dog and rushed over to pull the dog away. Seriously, I feel like I'm that neighbor right now.
"I'm sorry! I didn't know you were busy!" I managed to say after thinking for a while.
"What do you mean, 'sorry'!" Xiaolin said irritably, "Do you know how troublesome it is to pick up Wenwen? Do you know how hard it is to get a girl like that? Do you know how satisfying it is to have her once you do? You're acting like you've caught someone cheating. You opened my door without knocking! Give me back my climax! I've only been inside for a short while!"
Xiaolin grabbed my neck and shook me violently.
"Please have mercy! I really didn't mean to!" I cried for help. Xiaolin let go.
"However, your trouble is bigger than mine!" he said abruptly. "What do you mean?"
"Didn't you see how resentful Wenwen looked at you when she walked out? I think she'll never talk to you again! You're in big trouble now!" Xiaolin's tone was somewhat gloating.
"Hey! It was you who messed with her, not me! Why is she angry with me?!"
"Because you just stood there like an idiot watching! Like you were watching someone put on a live sex show. Who else would she hate if not you?!" Xiao Lin said.
"Is that so?" I asked, somewhat doubtful.
Xiao Lin laughed: "You have impure thoughts about her too, don't you?!" He said it with such a sly tone.
But I didn't answer him; I knew I must look guilty.
"Yeah! Just admit it! You want to sleep with her, don't you?" Xiao Lin's smile grew increasingly wicked.
"I didn't come here to discuss this." I had to become serious.
"Is that so? Then let's talk about your business!" Xiao Lin sat back down: "If it's not something serious, you'll have to pay me tonight to get you back tonight's climax."
"Okay!" I figured my business must be important enough, so I readily agreed to Xiao Lin's request.
"I know about the recent collaboration between the center and the health bureau," I said. Xiao Lin's face immediately changed upon hearing this, and he rushed to the door to see if anyone was outside.
"How did you know?" Xiao Lin looked like he'd seen a ghost.
“Don’t worry about that for now. I won’t betray you anyway. I just want to ask you for a favor.”
“What favor?” Kobayashi asked.
“I know you’re in charge of managing all the respondents’ semen in this research project. I’d like you to check the status of the semen inventory.”
“Why do you want to know this?”
“I want to prove Chen Yizhi’s innocence.” I said, “If Chen Yizhi’s sample isn’t in the inventory, I might be able to prove that he’s innocent.”
“Just because Chen Yizhi was a respondent, you think he’s innocent?” Kobayashi looked displeased.
“That’s why I’m here to verify.”
“Then let me tell you, when I put all the semen into the database, not a single person was missing.” Kobayashi’s tone was resolute.
“Then could someone have tampered with it after it was put in?” I asked.
"That's even more impossible! No one but me can go into the warehouse alone, of course! If you suspect me, that's a different story."
"What are you talking about!" I said helplessly, "I just came to ask for your help, I don't suspect you." I paused, "Xiao Lin, could you take me to that warehouse?"
"No!" Xiao Lin refused without room for argument, "That's against the rules. If the health bureau finds out, our center will be in big trouble."
"Just help me out!" I pleaded.
"I can help you with anything, except this time. You know if this gets exposed, everyone's finished." Xiao Lin grabbed my shoulder, "Xiao Mao, just give up! Don't try to be a hero, what good will it do you?"
"I just want to be true to my conscience."
Xiao Lin sneered, "You're just asking for trouble."
"Looks like you're not going to help! Fine, I won't force you." I turned to leave.
"Xiao Mao!" Xiao Lin called after me, I wondered if he had changed his mind.
"Don't say I didn't warn you, you'll get yourself into trouble if you keep going like this."
Xiaolin's tone carried a hint of murderous intent, which frightened me, but my courage to find out the truth also made me stand tall. I left Xiaolin's office without looking back.
Xiaolin refuses to help, so what should I do? I suddenly realized that perhaps Xiaolin's computer contains relevant files, which might tell me the location of the warehouse. But the problem is, how do I get into Xiaolin's computer? I can't just sneak into Xiaolin's room! The center's security system is very tight, and I'm not a professional thief; that route won't work. It seems only a computer can solve the problem. I immediately thought of Xiaoqu; she's our center's "amateur" computer expert, and her skills amaze even professional experts. With that in mind, I immediately went to find Xiaoqu. As soon as
Xiaoqu heard that we needed to sneak into Xiaolin's computer, she immediately agreed, but she requested a separate workspace, so we moved our base back to my research lab.
"How long do you need?" I asked.
"I'm not sure. I have to write a program that the computer can accept; it might take a few days or a few minutes!
I can't tell you exactly when it will be finished," Xiaoqu said.
"Damn it! What we lack right now is time."
"When will Chen Yizhi be executed?" Xiaoqu asked.
"It's the end of the month, so we only have a week left." I was really worried that we wouldn't have enough time.
"Okay! Let's get to work!" Xiao Qu said, rolling up her sleeves. "Leave everything to me!
I promise I won't let you down."
Then all I heard was the sound of Xiao Qu typing on her keyboard. During the long wait, all sorts of thoughts wandered through my mind. I thought about things that had happened recently, especially regarding sex. I found myself no longer as... how should I put it? I should say I'm no longer as conservative as before!
I no longer felt as much guilt as before. In fact, I felt less and less guilty. I even masturbated when that beast Yang Zhihong raped me. I found that my desires were becoming stronger and stronger. Under this intense desire, I realized that my previous self-restraint seemed like a pointless act of self-righteousness. I had been in contact with it all along, just suppressing it. But it was useless. Like Chen Yizhi, it only made me satisfy myself in another way. Thinking about this, I realized I was very similar to Chen Yizhi. He had mentioned raping a teacher in his diary, and in my memory, I had also had sexual fantasies about teachers.
I remembered Xiao Wei, the psychology lecturer in college!
Xiao Wei! That young psychology lecturer! She was undeniably beautiful. Our class of boys once held a poll called "Top Ten Women We Want to Sleep With," and Xiao Wei won first place by a landslide.
She absolutely deserved it. Every time she taught, the other habitually skipping classes would obediently stay behind, just for her angelic face and devilish figure.
Just thinking about this made my lower body excited. I remembered a similar feeling I had one day in Xiao Wei's office.
I was supposed to discuss my graduation thesis with her that day, but as soon as I entered the office, my thoughts drifted away from the thesis structure, completely focused on Xiao Wei's beautiful body. Although her clothes covered her tightly, they only accentuated her alluring figure.
I stared at the white neck peeking out from under the high-necked white sweater, a fragrance emanating from Xiaowei's flowing hair. Lost in my own world, I leaned closer to her, the unique scent of a woman almost pressing my lips to her neck. I closed my eyes, forcing myself away, the heat in my throat spreading rapidly throughout my body, a feeling of wanting to burst, as if a sword were cleaving me from head to toe. I exhaled heavily.
"Gu Cheng, the data you discussed in Chapter Two is too old. It's questionable whether research on the psychological state of the Taiwanese population ten years ago can be used to corroborate current issues," Xiaowei suddenly turned to me and said. I froze, momentarily speechless. Xiaowei looked puzzled. Did she know what I was thinking?
"You don't seem to be listening to me. What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing," I scratched my head, "I'm just thinking about how to answer."
Xiaowei giggled, leaning back in her swivel chair. My gaze naturally settled on her 33-inch breasts. Ah! The epitome of a woman's beauty! I imagined the feeling of my fingers tracing their length, as if the warm touch were truly sliding across my fingertips, my entire hand holding that fullness that only a man understands. I gently caressed Xiaowei's nipples, sucking on them, feeling the excitement and breath she exhaled, and her breasts gradually becoming engorged and hard from my teasing…
I felt my jeans bulging, the raised area feeling warm and moist. "Gu Cheng, you're just too serious!" Xiaowei laughed again, her high-pitched voice like a murmur, echoing in the small room. I swallowed, my mind filled with the image of Xiaowei being fucked. Did she moan in that voice?
Xiaowei changed her sitting position, her legs, which had been together, now crossed in a beautiful arc, as sexy as Sharon Stone in The Sixth Sense. I love women's legs, I fucking adore those lines, especially Xiaowei's sitting posture, which showcases the most beautiful lines of her legs. I stared intently at Xiaowei's snow-white thighs, wanting to trace those curves deep into the base of her thighs, to penetrate the forbidden area between her tight skirt and thighs.
I growled, trying to banish the snake in my head that tempted me to eat the forbidden fruit. But the more I thought about it, the more I saw my hand moving lightly over Xiaowei's calves, my fingers and palms alternating, caressing the woman's soft body. Slowly, my hand slid over Xiaowei's thighs, from the outside to the inside, and then from the inside towards the point where her legs met. I saw myself pulling out a pair of black panties, trimmed with transparent buds…
But why did I only dare to think about it? When Xiaoyu offered herself to me, why did I feel a sense of disgust, like I wanted to vomit! I really don't understand! What's wrong with me! Why am I so afraid of sex, yet so fond of imagining it?
I think the reason I believe Chen Yizhi might be innocent is probably because I agree with his feelings on this point: as he said, we're the same kind of people!
"Brother Chen!" It was Xiao Qu's voice! I quickly snapped out of my reverie.
"Brother Chen! What are you thinking about? You seem so focused!"
"Nothing!" I was completely distracted; I was only concerned about whether she had finished.
"I have something to tell you!" Xiao Qu's tone made it sound like she was about to reveal a very important secret. I didn't say anything, just forced a smile.
"I heard the director and H arguing this afternoon!"
Hearing H made me perk up! Hearing her arguing with the director naturally made me sit up straight.
"Tell me about it!" I said. Immediately, the image of H being violated by Yang Zhihong this morning flashed into my mind.
"I heard the director loudly ask H if she went out with you yesterday. He told H to stop denying it, saying he had evidence to prove that you two were indeed together yesterday."
"And then?" I couldn't help but get anxious. Judging from Yang Zhihong's actions this morning, I was afraid that H would be bullied by him.
"Then there was a lot of banging and clanging, like the two of them were fighting! I only heard H say something like, 'You have no right to interfere in my life, it's my freedom to like whoever I want,' and things like that."
I never thought that a grown man would beat up a weak woman. This guy surnamed Yang is really despicable.
"But later, when the room quieted down, the director said something that really made me nervous." Xiao Qu seemed hesitant.
"Just say it! It's come to this." I urged.
Xiao Qu hesitated for a moment before slowly speaking: "I heard the director say he'd find a way to deal with you. If H doesn't listen to him, one day he'll kick you out of the center, so H will never see you again!"
"What a joke!" I roared angrily. "Does he really think he has superhuman abilities?!
Fine, I'll quit, okay? I can still survive by doing odd jobs, what kind of idiot is he?!"
Yang Zhihong thinks he's a mafia boss! He's just a center director, and he thinks he's a god!
"Alright! Don't be angry," Xiao Qu said. "Don't be so impulsive! Even if you don't think about yourself, you should think about H! Her situation is pitiful too."
My heart sank when I thought of H. Sigh! Her situation is probably worse than mine; to put it bluntly, she's practically Yang Zhihong's plaything now!
“Brother Chen,” Xiao Qu laughed, “You like H, right? Stop pretending! She’s a really nice girl! It’s perfectly normal to like her. I always thought she got her position because of her looks, but now that I’m her assistant, I’ve realized she’s actually quite talented.”
“You seem to admire her a lot!” I said, somewhat pleased.
“I really have no complaints about a woman like that,” Xiao Qu said with a smile.
“Wait a minute!” Xiao Qu shouted, staring at the computer screen, “I did it!”
“What!” I exclaimed incredulously, “Only half an hour!”
“I did it! We can get into Xiao Lin’s computer now!” Xiao Qu was ecstatic, “I’m a genius! Haha!” Xiao Qu shouted with unbridled joy. Although I had hoped she would hurry, I hadn’t expected things to go so smoothly!
"Fantastic!" I patted Xiao Qu's shoulder. "You're a genius!"
"Of course!" Xiao Qu's expression was full of pride. "Even the center's full-time computer engineer admires me!"
"Alright, enough chit-chat! Let's find that file I mentioned!" Xiao Qu finally dropped his smug look. We opened all of Xiao Lin's files. The computer screen displayed a row of file names, making it difficult to keep up.
"Brother, what's the name of that file?" Xiao Qu asked.
"I think it's called something like 'combination'," I said, and Xiao Qu quickly typed "combination" into the file name box.
"There's no such file!" Xiao Qu turned to look at me. "Could you be mistaken?"
"Probably not. Maybe Xiao Lin changed the name when he saved it!"
"Is that so? That's troublesome." Xiao Qu said, "We'll just have to search for it one by one."
It seemed that was the only way. So Xiao Qu and I searched for the files one by one. While searching for the file, I found a very interesting file name: sexlife. Xiao Qu noticed it too, so we opened that file.
After opening the file, we found that it was a list of data. Besides names and general identification information, the list also included dates of meeting, dates of obtaining the woman, sexual experience, locations of sex, and special hobbies. This list was clearly Xiaolin's conquest record.
"This is Xiaolin's womanizing data!" Xiaoqu immediately reacted. "Why doesn't this guy get an STD?"
I laughed, but my smile didn't last long before turning into surprise because the people on the list were truly astonishing. This list included not only women but also men! I hadn't expected Xiaolin to sleep with men. I thought about some of Xiaolin's actions when we went to a bar a few days ago... Wow! Could he possibly want to...?
It makes me want to vomit! Just thinking about two penises rubbing together makes me feel nauseous. I'm not against homosexuality, it's just that I'm not into it!
"Brother Chen! Why is Yi Qingyu's name on this list?" Xiaoqu noticed this fact with her sharp eyes.
"Because Yi Qingyu used to be Xiaolin's girlfriend."
"What a coincidence! All the women Xiaolin slept with are dead?" Xiaoqu asked a question that shocked me. Yes! Two women connected to Xiaolin are dead, and their deaths are remarkably similar. I have a bad feeling.
Thinking of this, I immediately looked at the list in front of me.
Chen Shaoxiu, a policewoman, sex location: detention center! This line of information almost made my eyes pop out, because the woman in the last policewoman murder was named Chen Shaoxiu. Could this just be a coincidence?
Then I saw another line: Li Jinquan, hotel owner, sex location: hotel toilet.
Isn't this the owner of that pub from last time? He also had a sexual relationship with Xiaolin!
Qiu Wen'ai, a graduate student, currently unemployed, sex location: Haoshuai Hotel.
Wang Lingjun, a technical R&D specialist at IBC Company, sex location: Mood Motel.
If I remember correctly, she's the woman Xiaolin was suspected of murdering last time.
Seeing this, I couldn't help but make a very bold deduction: could Xiaolin be the real murderer?
But such a deduction doesn't prove anything. I continued reading, hoping to find more clues!
If I'm not mistaken, this Wang Wen'ai should be the Xiao'ai from Chen Yizhi's diary. To confirm this, I specifically asked Xiao Qu to ask Chen Yizhi for confirmation.
But why would Xiao Lin know Xiao'ai? Could Xiao'ai also be a member of Chen Yizhi's gang?
"Brother Chen!" Xiao Qu's voice pulled me back to reality.
"How is it? Is Qiu Wen'ai Xiao'ai?" I was eager to know the answer.
"You guessed right! Qiu Wen'ai is Xiao'ai, but Chen Yizhi said it's strange that Xiao Lin knows Xiao'ai. He said he didn't remember Xiao Lin having any connections with Xiao'ai, and he hadn't heard anything about Xiao'ai and Xiao Lin being together. Then he asked me why I asked that question."
"You didn't tell him anything, did you?"
"No." Xiao Qu shook his head: "Because it doesn't mean anything."
I nodded: "Okay, let's deal with things here first and then tell him."
What Xiao Qu just said proved one thing: Xiao'ai is indeed not a member of Chen Yizhi's gang. I had a bad feeling, so I asked Xiao Qu to call Xiao'ai again. I wanted to know Xiao'ai's current whereabouts.
I went through my thoughts again, but I found my mind was a complete mess.
I printed out the list, wondering if there were any other clues in Kobayashi's other files.
Returning to the file directory, I found another file with an interesting title: "Diary." If this was Kobayashi's diary, it might provide more information. However, I noticed that the file's archiving date was the 10th of last month. If she wrote every day, the date would be either yesterday or today. And judging from the file's length, it definitely exceeded 100,000 words!
I opened the file, and the shock I felt upon seeing it was beyond words. I hadn't expected it to be Chen Yizhi's diary! What on earth was going on?
But while I was still reeling from the shock, the computer screen suddenly disappeared, then went to a deletion state. Could it be that Xiaolin had discovered my intrusion into his computer and destroyed all the records? This made me even more convinced that Xiaolin was connected to these recent murders.
Now that I'd been discovered, I figured I didn't need to hide anymore. I thought the best thing to do was to go directly to Xiaolin and get to the bottom of things. Before leaving, I even contacted the police.
I barged into Xiaolin's lab, but as soon as I entered, I noticed a strange sonic disturbance.
At the same time, the lights in Xiaolin's lab were flashing a pinkish glow. My eyes closed, unable to adjust, and when I opened them, I saw Xiaolin sitting on the table wearing tight underwear. I was stunned. How could this be?
"Xiaoqu, what are you doing?" I felt my throat tighten. "Didn't I tell you to make a call? And what happened? Is Xiao Ai alive?" I said, closing the door behind me. I didn't want anyone to see and misunderstand.
Xiaoqu seemed not to hear me. She kept striking suggestive poses, making me feel like she was seducing me.
"Brother Chen! I've liked you for a long time," Xiaoqu said softly. "Let's put aside all work for now! Let's have some fun!" She said, taking off her clothes.
I couldn't believe what I was hearing and seeing. I think anyone in my shoes wouldn't believe what was happening. Why was Xiaoqu acting like this? Although I didn't want to say it, she was behaving like a slut.
"Xiaoqu, what are you doing?" I shouted at her, hoping she could hear me.
Xiaoqu laughed happily after hearing me. "What am I doing? I want you! Brother Chen."
Xiaoqu took off her bra and threw it in front of me, revealing her ample bosom.
I swallowed hard, feeling a bit hot.
Xiao Qu had already walked in front of me, her breasts pressed tightly against my chest.
"Brother Chen, let's forget everything! Let's seize the moment!" Xiao Qu said, hooking her foot around my waist. I felt her straddle me, and I involuntarily took a few steps back.
"Xiao Qu, don't do that," I stammered, but my eyes secretly glanced at Xiao Qu's beautiful figure.
Actually, Xiao Qu's figure, like her computer, was quite admired. Especially her breasts; many people called her "milk mom" or "big-breasted woman" behind her back. As her boss, I had naturally noticed her figure. I remember once, Xiao Qu was wearing a round-neck t-shirt, and when she bent down to tie her shoelaces, I almost embarrassed myself standing in front of her because, looking through the neckline, Xiao Qu's full breasts were hanging right in front of me.
I admit to my erection, and of course, I've regretted it for quite some time. But today, seeing Xiaoqu's voluptuous body again, and not just a part of it like before, but her entire body, I found myself even more unable to control myself than before.
I really felt myself trembling, and my lower body began to react.
"Come on! What are you afraid of!" Xiaoqu's expression became more and more alluring, and she reached out and tightly grasped my hand, guiding me to caress her breasts.
At that touch, I was completely paralyzed. I didn't care about morality or principles anymore; the pleasure I felt was far more real and far more comfortable than any of those concepts.
I let Xiaoqu guide my hand to explore every part of her body. I found this feeling incredibly wonderful; I never imagined a woman's body could be so soft, the touch was amazing.
Xiaoqu began to unbutton my clothes, gently kissing me from my ears and neck to my exposed chest. The contact between our lips and bodies sent shivers down my spine, making my ears tingle and feel like hundreds of thousands of ants were crawling all over me.
Xiao Qu slowly lowered herself, her tongue swirling around my waist. Then she unbuckled my belt and slipped her hand inside. My penis, now unrestrained, stood even straighter. I felt Xiao Qu grip it tightly, playing with it repeatedly. I felt I was about to lose control.
Just as I was about to pull Xiao Qu up, she seemed to have read my mind and quickly retreated to the table. She straddled the table with one leg, using the other to support herself, spreading her legs wide in an exaggerated manner, her hands constantly rubbing her body, especially her breasts. These actions, which I had only ever seen on late-night channels, were now happening right in front of me.
I slowly walked towards Xiao Qu, and when I touched her, I felt a real connection.
I lifted her onto the table. I wanted to kiss her, but she avoided my lips.
"Just come in!" The neighborhood's voice was so strong it felt like my bones were melting, but it was definitely enough to command me. I immediately pulled down my pants and her panties at the same time.
"Take it slow!" The neighborhood's voice whispered beside me, "Let me guide you." As she spoke, she grasped my penis and slowly inserted it into her vagina.
The first sensation was one of wetness, and slowly, a feeling of being squeezed enveloped my little brother. I felt like I was about to collapse because my penis had never been so tightly surrounded before.
Slowly, my waist began to move, and my little brother slid smoothly inside her vagina.
Wow! This feeling was truly amazing. With each in-and-out movement, I felt a surge of energy flowing into my body; it was incredible .
The neighborhood also moved her waist in sync with my movements, her legs tightly hooked around my waist, and she hummed softly.
As I thrust, I listened to the neighborhood's moans in my ear, and all my senses were experiencing an unprecedented pleasure.
"Quickly, strangle me!" the neighborhood said breathlessly, "Quickly, strangle me!" The neighborhood's sudden request struck me as very strange.
But then I immediately remembered that some people enjoy being "treated" in other ways during sex
to achieve orgasm, and I guessed Xiaoqu was probably one of them.
However, choking is actually very dangerous; an accident could easily happen if you're not careful. But Xiaoqu had already placed my hand on her neck.
I figured as long as I was careful, everything would be fine! So I did as she said. Xiaoqu looked quite satisfied, and seeing her enjoying it made me happy too.
After a while, Xiaoqu actually picked up a utility knife.
"Cut me!" Xiaoqu pleaded, "Cut me quickly!" She handed me the utility knife.
This was insane! I thought this game should end.
"Xiaoqu, this is too dangerous! Let's not do it!"
"Quickly, cut me!" Xiaoqu didn't hear what I was saying at all.
I thought a gentle cut would be fine! To satisfy her, I did as she said and gently made a cut on my right arm.
"Oh!" Xiaoqu screamed, and that scream terrified me.
Just as I was about to put the knife away, Xiaoqu demanded that I cut her again. I had no choice but to do as she said. I noticed she was getting increasingly high, like she was on drugs.
Watching the blood gushing from the table, I felt terrible. I wanted to tell her we shouldn't play this game anymore, but then the door opened. Standing there was Xiaolin, looking surprised. I smiled at him, remembering how I had opened Xiaolin's door under similar circumstances last time. I could now somewhat understand how Xiaolin felt. Just as I was about to explain to him, he pointed his finger at me and yelled,
"You dared to rape Xiaoqu with a knife in my office!" He glanced at the blood on the table. "You even killed her!"
"I didn't!" I protested loudly.
"You still say you didn't? The blood on the table, and Xiaoqu isn't moving anymore, Xiao Mao! I never thought you were this kind of person!" "
I didn't! It's not what you think!" I tried to explain to Xiaolin.
"Murder! Help! Something's happened here!" Xiaolin gave me no chance to explain, shouting incessantly towards the door. I had no choice but to pull up my pants and quickly flee.
I hadn't expected Xiaolin's voice to attract so much attention so quickly; almost everyone in the neighborhood had gathered around.
"Catch him!" Xiaolin shouted as he came out of the door, "He's the murderer! He just raped and murdered the resident!
Catch him!"
I was utterly speechless. Several people had already surrounded me, and in desperation, I pushed through the crowd. I finally managed to squeeze through, but as soon as I stepped out the door, I found the police coming towards me.
How clever of me! These police officers were originally invited by the resident to investigate Xiaolin, but now they posed a threat to me. Seeing my state, they immediately drew their guns and gestured for me to stop. I quickly ran towards the flowerbed on my right.
"Stop!" Now even the police are after me, telling me to stop? What a joke! I ran for my life, because the situation was dire. Then I heard gunshots! Yes, gunshots!
I saw smoke rising from the grass at my feet.
Oh my god! They were shooting at me! I froze, terrified that if I moved, their bullets would hit me, just like they had hit the grass.
"Get in!" Just then, a screeching of tires mixed with a shrill female voice rang in my ears. I saw a white sports car drive up the road and into the flowerbed, blocking my way. The front door was open, and I realized that H was driving.
"What are you standing there for! Get in!" H yelled at me. After hearing her words, I realized I couldn't afford to be arrested by the police here. I was innocent!
Thinking of this, I immediately jumped into H's car. As soon as I was in, H floored the gas and sped away. I saw police chasing us in the rearview mirror; several of them had already raised their guns, and I could almost feel several guns aimed at me.
"Keep your head down!" H said, pressing my head down. "Are you tired of living? Watch out for bullets!" Before H finished speaking, I heard a burst of gunfire, and the right-side rearview mirror shattered. I was so frightened that I ducked under the seat.
But seeing H's calm demeanor, I felt my behavior was utterly shameful, so I sat back down.
H finally managed to shake off the police pursuit, and just as I breathed a sigh of relief, three police cars appeared in front of me, one of which had already blocked my way in the middle of the road.
I looked at H in alarm, and to my surprise, I saw him laugh.
"Hold on tight!" After saying that, she immediately made a sharp U-turn, almost throwing me off. The car swerved into an alley, just wide enough for one car. It moved smoothly forward, leading to a main road. Just then, another police car blocked our path.
"Tsk!" H looked clearly surprised. But I was wrong. She wasn't scared at all. I could tell from the throttle she was pressing that she was having a blast! She didn't slow down at all; instead, she accelerated! The officers in the police car, seeing things were getting out of hand, scrambled to avoid us. I gripped the back of my seat tightly.
"Bang!" H rammed the police car. I felt a wave of impact wash over me, a tingling sensation! The force of the impact was immense. But after clearing a path, I felt a surge of satisfaction. Looking at the wrecked police car behind me, I felt a sense of pride. This feeling was pretty good!
"What's wrong?" H asked. "Are you afraid of damaging police property?"
"No," I said with a wry smile. "I just found it very exciting."
"Really?" H took out a cigarette from the glove compartment in the front seat and slowly lit it. "You seemed quite scared just now."
"Hehe!" I laughed awkwardly. "I admit the gunshot scared me, but you can't blame me! I used to never even get a ticket, so of course I was terrified in this situation!"
"I didn't mean to laugh at you," H explained.
"I know," I said. "But when I rammed the police car, I felt..."
I couldn't find the right words to describe my feelings.
"It was exhilarating!" H said. "Right!" she laughed.
"Yeah, I guess so! Suddenly I found it quite interesting."
"Yeah! I've wanted to try that for a while now."
Just as we were talking, another police car appeared behind us, and this time the police opened fire immediately.
Gunshots whistled past my ears.
Two police cars were trying to set up a roadblock ahead to intercept us.
"Damn it!" H exclaimed in a panic, "We're blocked in front and behind!"
"Go around!" I said.
"What! What did you say?!"
"I said go around!" I pointed to the adjacent lane: "Drive into that lane."
"Are you kidding me?!" H looked incredulous. "That's the opposite direction."
"We have no choice," I said. "Listen to me, or we'll miss our chance."
After hearing my words, H had no choice but to bite the bullet and drive into the opposite lane. The oncoming cars swerved to avoid us, and the whole road became chaotic.
H wiped the sweat from her forehead, but I was even more nervous than her. Watching car after car flash past us, my heart was about to stop.
We finally made it to the intersection, but it seemed like fate was deliberately working against us, and we ran into a red light. H, of course, ignored it, accelerated, and even made a left turn to speed away. However, the rear of the car was hit head-on by a car that couldn't brake in time, and my head hit the car window.
Although it hurt, it was much better than being caught by the police or being killed in the accident.
(VI)
We finally escaped the police pursuit and settled into a small motel. In order to avoid being recognized, H and I even switched to a motorcycle. I wondered if the owner of the motorcycle shop would still accept H's credit card if he knew what had happened to us recently.
"What are you thinking about?" H was holding a bag.
"Nothing," I said, "I'm just feeling pretty tired." I sat lazily in a chair.
"Where did you go?" I asked.
"Buying some things, food, supplies, and this!" H pulled a gun out of the bag.
"How did you get this thing! Don't you need a license to buy one?!" I exclaimed in surprise.
"In Taiwan! The rules are just for show. As long as you have money, everything is easy." H looked smug.
"Buying this gun will make things more complicated for us. Don't you know the police are after us?"
"Regarding that," H pulled up a chair and sat down next to me, "that's exactly what I wanted to ask you. What exactly happened?"
"It's a long story." I told H the truth.
"You mean Xiaolin is the murderer in this series of murders?" H's eyes widened after hearing my words.
"I didn't say that. I just said Xiaolin was connected to these murdered people!"
"Hmm! Then why did Xiaoqu have sex with you?" That's a good question.
"I don't know." I know it sounds strange, but I really don't understand what Xiaoqu and I were doing back then.
"I feel like it's a dream. From the moment I entered the room, I felt something was wrong," I said.
"What was wrong?"
"I feel... I can't quite put my finger on it, it's just a weird feeling. The lights were pink when I entered the room, that's right!" I suddenly remembered: "I've always felt a sound in my ears, I feel like it's a special sound wave, it's been ringing in my ears!"
So you were hypnotized! H laughed: "You slept with someone and then said these things made you feel weird, what, trying to deny it!" "
I didn't mean to deny it, I was just telling the truth."
"Okay!" H took my hand: "Of course I believe you, otherwise why would I drive here to rescue you?" "
I'm actually very grateful for that! But the thought of the neighborhood makes my heart sink. I wonder how she is doing, how she'll face her colleagues in the future?
" "Alright!" H suddenly blurted out.
"What's alright?" I asked, only then noticing that H had taken out her laptop.
"Where did you get your laptop?" I hadn't seen H with it on the way here.
"I've kept it in my car! You just didn't notice."
"Oh," I replied. "What did you just say, 'Alright'? What do you mean?" I asked.
"I've connected to Yang Zhihong's computer. I think I should be able to find out where the semen is stored."
"That's great!" I exclaimed, overjoyed. I pressed myself against H, hoping to find out where the semen was stored as soon as possible, but my action annoyed H.
"Don't lean on me like that! I hate it when people are behind me when I'm working! Go watch TV, I'll tell you the results later." "H muttered.
There was nothing I could do but obey H and turn on the TV.
The first thing I saw was a picture of H and me; it seemed things had really gotten out of hand.
"According to reports, the murderer, Chen Gucheng, is currently a researcher at the research center. He was recently demoted and harbored resentment, so the police suspect the motive for the murder was his own psychological breakdown. And the deceased, Qu Huiping…" What! The deceased! No way! I only made a few cuts on her with a utility knife, and now they're saying she's dead! And that I killed her? Those wounds wouldn't even kill a kitten! What's going on?
"He kept stabbing her with the utility knife, and by the time I saw it, it was too late…" It's Xiaolin! He's talking nonsense! I didn't keep stabbing her; he's lying.
I slammed the TV off.
"Looks like you're in big trouble!" H stood behind me, looking very worried.
"I didn't kill Xiao Qu, H, I'm serious." "I did cut her with a utility knife, but that was what she asked me to do, and I only made a few symbolic cuts. That kind of injury wouldn't kill her."
"Calm down," H said. "Don't get so agitated."
"Do you believe me?" I asked. "H, tell me, do you believe me?"
"Calm down!" H shook my shoulders heavily. "If I didn't believe you, I would have had the police arrest you long ago. Why would I stay here with you?" Her voice brought me back to my senses.
"The problem now is, how do we prove Xiaolin is lying?" H asked.
Although I was more alert, it didn't mean I could come up with a good solution.
"Unless there's a witness!" My voice was filled with despair. "But no one saw me having sex with Xiaolin!"
"That's right, I remember now. Yang Zhihong installed cameras in every office to monitor everyone. If we find the discs inside the cameras, we can clear your name of murder."
"Really?" "H's words rekindled my hope: 'Are you serious? Every lab has cameras?' I was a little uneasy.
'Yang Zhihong said it himself, and he even showed it to me.'
H's words filled me with joy; it seemed there was still hope for me.
'Great! We'll split into two groups now. I've just found out where the semen is stored. We'll go separately.
I'll go find the disc, and Gu Cheng, you go to the semen storage location.' H planned it this way.
'I'm a little worried about letting you go to the center alone.' I was a little anxious.
'Don't worry!' H laughed: 'I know the center much better than you do.
When Yang Zhihong and I were still together, we often used secret passages to avoid suspicion.'
'Secret passages?' I hadn't expected our center to have any secret passages. 'Like in the movies?' I asked curiously.
'Have I told you that curiosity killed the cat? If it doesn't concern you, just ignore it.'" "Getting to the bottom of everything will only cause you trouble." H tapped my nose, then got up and walked towards the bathroom.
"Let's rest early! I'll take a shower first, you don't mind, do you?" she asked.
Of course I would mind! But H was right, I was really tired after such a long day, and I lay on the bed trying to relax my tense mind and body.
But the sound of water coming from the bathroom made my mind wander, as if my heart was being washed away inside. I sat up straight, staring at the locked bathroom door, where a beautiful body was moving.
I imagined H taking a shower, and my throat tightened. I wished I were that rushing water, flowing endlessly through H's body, from her neck to her soft and full breasts, down her lower abdomen, slowly converging towards her mysterious triangle, and then falling to the ground from her long, snow-white legs, repeating this cycle endlessly.
The thought made me restless, and I found myself unconsciously moving closer to the bathroom door. My ear was pressed tightly against the door, as if I could trace the outline of H's body through the sound of the running water. Gradually, I seemed to see something: first, H's thighs, those evenly proportioned and long thighs, shimmering with a breathtaking light under the glow of the water! In the steamy little bathroom, it was so hot that I couldn't speak...
Damn it! What am I doing? What time is it? I'm in a dangerous situation right now, and I'm still indulging in fantasies: and the object of my lust is H, who risked her life simply because she trusted me! I'm such a damn bastard!
Chen Gucheng! This is the kind of person you are. If you could control yourself, you wouldn't have gotten yourself into this mess. I thought you would learn your lesson, but instead you're thinking about these nonsense things. You're hopeless, a waste of your mother's expectations of you since childhood.
I gave myself a good scolding. Honestly, I went back to bed. Something I find strange is that when I was with Xiaolin in Xiaoxiao's office back then, I didn't feel anything like I do now. I don't feel guilty at all! Maybe I do, but I can't control my actions. Before, just thinking about it would make me feel guilty. I suddenly feel very conflicted. Before, whenever I thought about this kind of thing, I would feel like a sinner, and I would blame myself no matter what, except when I dreamed!
To be honest, having sex with Xiaoxiao really felt like a dream!
Thinking about this, my face involuntarily turned to the bathroom. I don't know if I was seeing things or what, but I felt like there was a gap in the bathroom door. I stood up and walked towards the bathroom. When I got closer, I was sure I wasn't seeing things, it was real! H hadn't closed the door properly!
Seeing that gap, my heart fluttered. My eyes explored inside the bathroom, and soon I saw H taking a shower. My heart and my eyes stopped at that moment. She was so beautiful! H's body presented a high degree of beauty at that moment! Like a masterpiece specially sculpted by God. This scene was clearly much more appealing than the last time H was raped by Yang Zhihong in the office. Watching H caress her body, I wished I were the foam on her skin. I couldn't help but open the door a crack. I didn't want to see only this narrow view; I didn't want H's body to be obstructed in any way. I wanted complete space to appreciate her.
Her body became even more alluring after the door was pushed open a little. In this wider space, H's body was no longer a slit, but a complete three-dimensional form. If I had any complaints, it was that I could only see H's side profile, not her front.
But the side profile was enough. Her curves were incredibly captivating from this angle. Watching her protruding breasts embraced in her right hand, her already full breasts appeared even fuller under the pressure of her right palm. The pink areolas, under the reflection of the water, transformed into a shimmering light, dazzling the eye in this tiny room of less than two square meters. Even though it was only the side profile, it was enough.
My heart started itching again, a sensation like an electric current coursing through my lower body. I pressed down on my penis; I knew it was already swollen. Good heavens! And this was just from the side!
H turned around, so now I saw her entire front. Parts I could only imagine before, or parts I couldn't see clearly, were now crystal clear. I scanned her body intently, my penis aroused by her fair, rosy skin. Her breasts were truly captivating, round and slightly high, swaying gently from side to side with H's movements. The visual effect was like waves, the waves of flesh vibrating my vision. My gaze drifted to the base of H's thighs, her legs tightly pressed together—was it intentional or was I overthinking it? Her hands were always moving over her genitals, so I could only vaguely see her mysterious forest, and it was just a dark impression.
I felt like a traveler wandering in the desert, facing this boundless oasis, my eyes almost popping out of their sockets. But when I realized it was just a mirage, the thirst in my throat intensified. That perfectly described my state; my mouth was so dry! I longed to hug H, who was showering, only from her could I find the satiating comfort I craved.
I felt H's gaze sweep over me, and I recoiled in surprise behind the door.
After a while, I peeked out again, this time fueling my burning desire even more intensely, because H's actions were astonishing. H was sitting on the edge of the bathtub, her legs wide open, my gaze able to penetrate the interior of her mysterious triangle. I could almost see her dark brown labia, with a mesmerizing slit running along their length. I felt like I was dying; my whole body felt like a giant furnace, too much heat surging within me, colliding everywhere, and I felt like I was about to explode from this heat. But H wouldn't let me go. She lightly wiped her body with exaggerated movements, which I thought was pure seduction! H exaggeratedly caressed her body, like a stripper. Her hands would squeeze her breasts one moment, then wander aimlessly over her waist, as if boasting about her body, as if she were showing off something.
After a while, she bent down to pick something up, her crotch exposed with the movement. Straight thighs, protruding buttocks, and a patch of red and black flesh between her thighs, some even showing through. I thought I would really die if I kept looking like this, but I couldn't bear to leave. Faced with my throbbing lower body and the overwhelming energy within me, it seemed I had no choice but to masturbate. So I reached into my pants.
And just then, I saw H smiling in the mirror, a smile that anyone could understand at a glance. That smile gave me the courage to rush forward and hug H. It seemed like all of this was H's hint.
It must be! First, she hadn't closed the door; then, her extremely sexy movements while showering; and now, her smile—all of these combined made me feel that H was welcoming me to bathe with her.
Thinking of this, the lust within me burned even more uncontrollably, and this flame finally made me push the door open.
H was stunned at first, then she quickly grabbed a towel from the corner: "What are you doing?" She had already covered herself, and didn't seem very angry. So I boldly approached her and reached out to pull her towel.
H was clearly surprised by my actions, so surprised that she forgot to resist. I pulled her close and embraced her. She looked up as if trying to push me away, but I seized the opportunity and eagerly kissed her lips. H kept her mouth tightly closed, and after some effort, my tongue still couldn't find its way in, so I withdrew and looked at H carefully.
H smiled, and this smile gave me a sense of encouragement, but this time I wasn't as hasty as before. I slowly met her lips; H was very cooperative after my first attempt.
We kissed passionately in the water. I held her tongue tightly in my mouth, my arms wrapped around her like a child clutching a toy. The jets of water from the showerhead acted like a stimulant, relentlessly assaulting my long-suppressed heart and gradually igniting my desire. I moved my tongue away from hers, sliding it down her neck and behind her ears. My tongue would sometimes lightly touch, like a whispering lover; my lips would sometimes be wild, like a bloodthirsty vampire. Under the teasing touch of my tongue, sometimes light, sometimes heavy, H's breathing became a erratic, low moan.
I kissed her skin frantically, desperately trying to feel her warmth and the softness of her body. I rubbed my chin against her cleavage, making H laugh.
My hands pushed H's breasts upwards, and her low moans turned into sharp, urgent cries. My tongue gently circled around her nipples, while my hands tightened their grip, as if I wanted to crush her breasts. I felt myself squeezing them very hard, and H's voice shattered into countless tiny notes that echoed throughout the bathroom. This still wasn't enough to satisfy my desire, so I began to nibble at H's breasts with my teeth, wanting to leave an unforgettable mark on those two mounds of flesh.
As soon as I did this, H's body trembled, like a snake. When I bit her nipple, she practically jumped.
I glanced at her expression; her face, besides pain, was filled with pleasure. Her face, glistening with water droplets, looked even more delicate and alluring. I couldn't resist kissing her lips again, our tongues intertwining tightly in the water.
H gripped my hair tightly, her body trembling slightly as she leaned against the wall. I lifted her thigh, my right hand sliding down her inner thigh towards her plump triangle. H's reaction was stronger than I expected; the moment I lightly touched her labia, she almost collapsed into my arms. But the delicate, soft feel of my fingers made me reluctant to leave. I probed further, a warm sensation quickly enveloping my fingers, and H's reaction intensified. Seeing the pain on her face, I stopped. H pushed me against the wall, and we switched positions. She began kissing my body, a strange, itchy sensation. I closed my eyes, savoring it all.
It was so wonderful! Feeling H's tongue roam across my chest was a pleasure. She moved lower, my hand gently stroking her hair, while her tongue reached my genitals. She grasped my penis, and I trembled all over, the trembling almost making my hair stand on end.
"What do you want to do?" my voice trembled. H looked up, smiled faintly, and then took my penis into her mouth.
I felt my head rush with blood, and my vision blurred. To keep myself from falling, I held H's head tightly. I felt a warm, itchy sensation on my penis, which I wasn't used to; after all, this place is very important to a man. So I tried to pull H up.
My hand had barely touched H's shoulder when her tongue began to slide across my penis. I leaned weakly against the wall, letting H do as she pleased. H's tongue licked my penis, and this delicate, soft sensation completely overwhelmed my brain; pleasure washed over me like a tidal wave. Seeing that I no longer resisted, H took my penis into her mouth again, this time deeper than before. H began to slowly push the shaft into her mouth, back and forth.
H's tongue licked my penis, her lips held it, her teeth gnawed at it. I was enjoying multiple services. H's movements quickened, and I realized all my heat was concentrated in my glans, and this energy was gradually being released. I wanted to stop her, but I couldn't speak anymore. I could only vaguely respond to her actions.
"H! No, stop... ah!" Just as I finally managed to say it, I was powerless to control the burst of energy. My penis convulsed violently, contracting in waves. I knew I had ejaculated. I saw milky white semen spilling from H's mouth.
I collapsed, completely powerless, tightly embracing H.
I woke up in the middle of the night, from my mother's face. I hadn't expected to dream of my mother stabbing herself with a knife again. I wondered if this was some kind of constraint.
Back when Xiaoyu and I were at Baisha Bay, after returning home, I dreamt that my mother stabbed me with a knife. Going back further, it was even more extreme; whenever my fantasies got really bad, my mother would appear in my dreams. The situation is much better now, especially after dealing with Chen Yizhi's case. I'm wondering if this is some kind of trauma. According to Freud's theory, some childhood memories can influence later life.
So, is the image of my mother stabbing me for my father the cause of my current views on sex? I keep wondering if I'm still living in that image, if I haven't grown up at all! I'm trapped in that day's situation, forever dragged to the bathroom by my mother, forever doused with cold water by her!
But just now, H and I also had sex in the bathroom, but why didn't I feel anything? It's strange, why did we have sex in the bathroom? Is this some kind of fate? Is this my chance to break free from memories from over a decade ago?
So many questions! My brain is overwhelmed, I can't think straight. I realize I'm incapable of answering these questions alone; if I keep thinking, my head will surely explode.
So I lay back down, and turning around, I saw H sleeping soundly across from me. I gazed at her sleeping face with delight. Was she the sexy goddess from the bathroom just now?
I was somewhat taken aback, a sense of unreality and insecurity washing over me. I pulled her tightly into my arms; only then could I be sure H was really beside me.
And the fuel of desire was added to the already extinguished fire. I couldn't sleep anymore, so I started playing with H's breasts. The feeling through her pajamas wasn't enough for my hands, so I slowly unbuttoned H's blouse. But coincidentally, H rolled over at that moment, and my hand was trapped underneath. I managed to pull my hand out with great difficulty.
But I didn't give up. I saw a section of H's shirt peeking out, so I reached inside along that exposed part. The feeling of touching H's body was wonderful; my palm was warm. I explored upwards and found something like a steel wire. I knew it was H's bra. My hand completely grasped her breast, squeezing and kneading it for a while. I felt unsatisfied, so my hand slipped inside the bra opening.
I quickly found her nipple and started playing with it. As I played with it, I seemed to feel her two breasts gradually hardening, and H's breathing began to become heavier.
I became somewhat emboldened and reached my hand to H's back. I spent a little time unhooking her bra and then slowly pulled it out. I was careful not to wake H; this was my game, and I found it quite fun.
H rolled over at that moment, almost slamming my hand down again. I rolled onto H's body and slowly unbuttoned her clothes. After the last button was undone, her beautiful breasts were fully exposed before my eyes. My penis was already erect, pressing tightly against H's body. I leaned down and gently bit her nipple. After a few licks, H's body trembled slightly. I stopped what I was doing and got off her, not to give up, but because I wanted to take off her pants.
I moved very carefully and slowly, and H's panties began to appear, followed by her alluring thighs. Like pulling an oil painting, I finally managed to take off H's pants. I rolled onto her again and spread her thighs apart. The area between her legs was plump and bulging. I couldn't resist touching it with my finger, and this made H tremble again. I could hear her breathing becoming very erratic.
I simply took off H's underwear, of course, still very carefully. Okay, now H is completely naked in front of me. I stroked her inner thighs, the final point being her pubic area. Only then did I realize she was wet; her entire pubic hair was damp, with a slightly salty smell. I also pulled down my underwear, and my erect penis shot out like a rocket, reaching straight for H's vulva. At that moment, I felt a sense of wickedness, a feeling exactly like what happened with Xiaoyu at that crucial moment.
“Don’t back down!” H suddenly spoke. “This is your psychological barrier; you can’t always run away from it by retreating.” H grasped my hands, demonstrating her philosophy through her actions as she actively moved towards my penis. But I pulled away. I realized my previously high spirits had vanished without a trace.
“I can’t!” I said, somewhat frustrated. “I feel like throwing up!”
H didn’t let my emotions falter. She grasped my penis and said, “You have to fight yourself!”
She said, “No matter what unpleasant memories or associations you have, you have to overcome them. I will help you.”
She began to rub my penis. This action did have some effect; my previously shrunken penis gradually swelled up again.
“Come on!” H lifted my chin. “Come and take me! Let me experience ecstasy!”
Then she grasped my penis and inserted it into her vagina. It went in smoothly, although a little tight, but the feeling was amazing!
I looked at H lying on the bed and began my actions. At first, I wasn't used to it, but H's cooperation was impeccable. Almost every thrust hit her G-spot, and H started moaning. My movements quickened, like an unstoppable machine, relentlessly thrusting. H's thighs were spread wider and raised higher than before. I could clearly hear the "plop plop" sounds of each thrust. I couldn't help but speed up my movements, and H became even more unrestrained, her high-pitched moans piercing my heart like swords. It felt so good!
This feeling was amazing; this was heaven.
When I paused slightly, H pushed me down; now it was her turn to initiate. Watching her sway up and down, her large breasts bobbing in front of me, I couldn't resist reaching out and grasping those two sweetest fruits of the earth. The moment my hand touched H, she seemed boneless, collapsing onto me, and I had to use both hands to support her body.
As she swayed, her breasts bounced in my hands. Seeing her blissful expression, my penis swelled even more inside her vagina. The tight grip sent my soul soaring to the heavens. I couldn't help but sit up and sway with her. Her legs were wrapped tightly around my waist; she was utterly wanton.
I never imagined that such an intertwining of two bodies could reach such a level! Oh! Goddess! Wanton goddess! Take me to heaven!
"I'm...coming..." H shouted passionately, followed by a spasm throughout her body. I felt a warm current inside her vagina, and under its impact, I could no longer control myself, ejaculating passionately. We both collapsed silently like deflated balloons...
(VII)
H told me that the location of all the semen was a warehouse on Section 5 of Minquan East Road. I had been waiting there for four hours; looking at my watch, it was almost eleven o'clock. I thought it was time to act.
Looking at the watch H gave me, a wave of warmth washed over me. I thought back to waking up in her arms this morning, a feeling of indescribable peace washing over me. At that moment, I felt an impulse; I didn't want to care about any of the world's rights and wrongs anymore. I just wanted to hold onto H's warm little hole.
This watch was taken from H's wrist, and of course, it carried a trace of her scent. I wasn't usually a watch enthusiast, but for H, I was willing to abandon all my principles.
Taking advantage of the guard's dozing off, I sneaked into the warehouse. I easily reached the door and searched for an entrance. Luckily, I found a window. I crept to the window and slightly moved it. To my surprise, the window wasn't closed. I thought I was incredibly lucky, so I carefully opened the window and slipped into the warehouse.
So far, everything had gone quite smoothly. For someone doing this for the first time, I think I did a pretty good job. I took out a flashlight and slowly searched the room.
The room full of test tubes initially gave me a headache, but after a while, I noticed that all the sperm were stored in order of stroke count. The long cabinet I was in was labeled with the surname Zeng, which has twelve strokes, so Chen must be earlier.
Sure enough, I found sperm stored in several long cabinets with the surname Chen. I started searching one by one, and it didn't take long before I found where Chen Yizhi's sperm was stored.
I excitedly took down the test tube, but it clearly contained semen. I was a little disappointed, but this was still within my expectations. If Xiaolin was indeed using Chen Yizhi's sperm to cover up his crimes, he wouldn't be so stupid as to let Chen Yizhi's sperm just disappear like that. I couldn't say whose sperm was in this test tube yet, and the best way was to take it out and test it. I carefully put the sperm into my bag.
It was going too smoothly! It went so smoothly that even I became afraid. I looked around nervously; from the moment I entered, I felt like someone was watching me. But after looking around, I didn't see anyone. I felt a little relieved; maybe I was overthinking it. Just
as I relaxed, suddenly all the lights in the room turned on. I was startled and was about to hide in a corner when a figure flashed out in front of me.
"You were waiting for me here?" My heart started racing.
"Yes!" Kobayashi slowly pulled a pistol from his pocket.
Seeing the gun in his hand, I felt an unprecedented terror.
"What do you want me to do?" Kobayashi pointed the gun at me: "My dearest friend!"
I was speechless for a long time. I never imagined that having a gun pointed at me would be so terrifying. I retreated behind the shelf, never expecting things to turn out this way.
"Kobayashi, listen to me, I just want to find out the truth. I'm not targeting you..."
I felt like my brain was drying up; it took me a long time to come up with these words.
Kobayashi's smile grew even colder: "The truth you're trying to uncover is aimed at me!"
Kobayashi's words exploded in my mind like a nuclear bomb. I hadn't expected things to actually be as I suspected—Kobayashi was the real culprit behind this series of murders!
"You really killed them!" I didn't know if my tone was fear or anger; I just felt my hair stand on end.
"Yes!" Kobayashi's tone was indifferent: "I did it all. What can you do to me?
You're just a fugitive now."
Hearing Kobayashi's words, I felt a fire ignite within me.
"You don't think you can do whatever you want just because of this. At least…" At this point, I realized my anger had vanished. The undeniable fact was that Kobayashi had the absolute advantage to control everything, while I was a lamb to the slaughter.
“Speak up! Aren’t you always so talkative? Speak up! Don’t you want to solve the case?” Kobayashi walked over smugly, step by step. “At least what? Speak up!”
“Are you mute?! Didn’t you hear me telling you to speak?” His voice gradually rose, and you could tell his emotions were unstable. “I told you to speak, did you hear me?” Then he fired a shot at the floor, the bullet bouncing around my feet. Because of the silencer, only a faint echo echoed throughout the room.
I was so scared I almost peed myself; my crotch felt slightly damp and warm.
“I forgot!” Kobayashi laughed, blowing on the smoking gun barrel. “I shouldn’t have threatened the witness.”
I remembered the tape recorder I always carried with me, and decided to take a gamble. So I laughed heartily—that kind of mocking laugh was my forte.
Kobayashi hesitated at my smile. “What are you laughing at?” Sure enough, my laugh made him waver.
“I’m laughing at how you’re so smug.” I took out the radio from my hand. “Look what this is.”
“Oh!” I couldn’t tell if Kobayashi’s tone was surprise or sarcasm.
“Are you trying to tell me that you recorded our conversation?” Kobayashi moved even closer to me, and as the gun in his hand drew closer, I felt my heart pounding faster and faster.
“That’s right!” I tried to sound brave. “I’ve recorded our entire conversation. You’d better
put down your weapon now…” “To avoid making another mistake, right?” Xiaolin laughed. “Hey Xiao Mao, please! You can save yourself the trouble with this gossipy, cliché dialogue.”
Xiaolin’s interruption made me feel like a child who had just been punished by a teacher. I stared at him blankly for a long time, speechless.
“Xiao Mao,” Xiaolin seemed to be talking to someone else, “If I kill you now, what use do you think that tape will be to me?”
Suddenly, Xiaolin’s words sounded like the voice of God, as if he knew everything. I felt he knew my situation inside and out.
“You shouldn’t be unaware that this is a tape recorder, right? If you kill me now, then the tape of our conversation will be handed over to the police by H…”
Xiaolin’s laughter drowned out my words. I had a bad feeling.
“You mean hand it over to H?” Xiao Cai’s laughter carried a chilling coldness.
"Come on, Xiao Mao. Let me show you what real life is like." Xiao Lin gestured for me to walk to the right, holding a gun. Only then did I notice a door there. I looked down, trying to figure out how to alert the guards. Logically, with the lights on, they should be on alert; but so far, I hadn't seen them make any move.
"Don't try to make any noise to attract their attention," Xiao Lin's cold voice sounded behind me. "The guards are my brothers, so forget about it!"
Those words pierced my heart like a sword, and despair washed over me.
But even greater despair awaited me after the door opened. The scene before me almost gave me a stroke.
I saw H tied to a chair, her mouth tightly taped shut. As soon as she saw me enter, tears streamed down her face. I turned to look at Xiao Lin, who was sneering.
"Are you still hoping for H's tape?" Kobayashi's lips curled into a triumphant smile. "I didn't expect that bitch would dare to go back to the research center. She thought only Yang Zhihong and she knew about her secret passage. Let me tell you, I've known for a long time. I don't know how many women I've brought, and occasionally men too! I caught her using this secret passage to enter and exit the center without any effort."
"However!" he continued, "I didn't expect that guy surnamed Yang would install surveillance systems in every corner." Kobayashi took out two discs. "Luckily, we found them in time, otherwise it would have been really troublesome! Of course, we should thank you guys for this too."
I gritted my teeth, looking at Kobayashi's smug expression.
"I think you must really want to see what's on the disc!" Kobayashi said, putting one of the discs into the computer behind him.
"It's very exciting, I think you'll like it." Kobayashi stepped aside. After a moment of darkness, the computer screen showed the image I most wanted to discard in my life.
The neighborhood never appeared in the scene; it was just me. I was the only one performing; the neighborhood was like an invisible man. All I saw was me kissing and touching thin air. When the camera showed me leaning against the table, twisting my hips, I wanted to disappear into a hole. It felt like being secretly filmed while masturbating. I kept swinging in the air, the tip of my penis not piercing the neighborhood's warm vagina, but the transparent air itself.
"Interesting, isn't it!" Xiaolin still had a big smile on his face. "Watching yourself completely naked, thrusting your penis into the air, is it satisfying? It's a classic of sex! I love it! Watching your penis stand erect in the air, watching you get pleasure from it, watching your satisfied and contented expression and the repetitive movements, I almost died laughing. Especially the scene of caressing the air, that's truly amazing!" Xiaolin burst into laughter.
I stared at Xiaolin with shame and anger. If I could, I would kill him without hesitation! But besides anger, there was a whole host of questions! Where did Xiaoqu go? Why couldn't I see her?
"That's why I said having sex in virtual reality is perverted! You can clearly see that from the way you looked in the video just now, right, Xiao Mao?"
"Virtual reality?" I gaped in disbelief.
"That's right! What you and Xiaoqu did was just a computer-generated illusion. How about that? Very realistic, right? This is the latest technology! But this product couldn't be released to the market because experiments found it had adverse side effects on the human brain. But don't worry, you only used it once, it won't have a big impact on you." Xiao Lin lit a cigarette: "Pretty exciting, right! Virgin, I even specially set it to a sexual violence game mode for you!"
I was speechless. If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I don't think I would have believed it. I never imagined that technology could reach such a level, making it impossible to distinguish between reality and illusion!
"The biggest feature of this software is that, in addition to the brain-stimulating function of a regular system, it also has a hypnotic function. It can extract the most persistent desires from everyone's heart." Xiaolin continued, "But this product has crossed into the realm of gods. Its side effects on people are like those of drugs, so it was banned while still in the experimental stage. However, since one of my girlfriends is a senior executive in this company, I was able to get this system. But don't get me wrong, I've never used it; I just don't know how to refuse women."
"What about Xiaoqu?" I suddenly thought of Xiaoqu. If having sex with me was just a dream, then how did she die later?
"Speaking of Xiaoqu! She provided another kind of sexual climax!" Xiaolin said, revealing a satisfied expression, his eyes filled with endless reminiscence.
"What exactly did you do to her?"
"Same as before! Except this experience was a bit different." Kobayashi licked his lips: "This is the first time I've ever raped someone, and I never expected it to feel so wonderful!"
"You demon!" I clenched my fists: "I want to tear you to pieces!"
"Ha!" Kobayashi laughed wildly: "Only demons can enjoy the sweetest pleasures in the world!
Wasn't your killing me for your own pleasure too?"
Looking at Kobayashi, I couldn't help but feel nauseous. This guy had completely gone mad!
"Xiao Mao, let me tell you, the feeling of raping someone is really amazing. Of course, you need to have a decent word for it, like Xiao Chu. Wow! When I tied her to the iron frame, watching her suffer and struggle, my dick got bulging like crazy. I couldn't wait to strip her clothes off, wow! It was incredible, Xiao Mao, you know Xiao Chu has a great figure to begin with!" Xiao Lin got more and more excited as he spoke, his face showing a rare flush.
What's embarrassing is that I also got more and more excited as I listened, my unruly organs stirring inside me.
"Watching her big breasts sway back and forth! My heart was practically itching to death."
Xiaolin continued, "I grabbed her breasts hard, pulled out my penis and shoved it in. This was the first time I'd ever gone in without any foreplay. I felt like my foreskin was being pulled back by her dry vagina. You didn't even hear the moans coming from the neighborhood, it was intoxicating! I felt like my soul was melting." Xiaolin's face grew redder and redder: "This kind of pleasure is enough to evaporate a person!" Xiaolin made a shuddering motion.
"And then you found a scapegoat to take the blame for you?" I said indignantly.
"Not one, but two! You and Chen Yizhi." Xiaolin had that smug smile on his face again.
“Chen Yizhi was annoying because I found him annoying. He always felt I had stolen his girlfriend and that I had wronged him. This guy who only masturbates in secret actually wanted me to give him an explanation, so…”
“So you killed Yi Qingyu and then framed Chen Yizhi.”
“Xiao Mao, can you stop making your reasoning sound like a soap opera?” Xiao Lin stubbed out his cigarette: “I had no intention of killing Yi Qingyu.”
“What nonsense are you talking about?” I was very dissatisfied with Xiao Lin’s explanation.
“Let me put it this way, Yi Qingyu herself asked me to kill her. I know you don’t understand now, but that’s the truth.” Xiao Lin shrugged, looking helpless: “You know, there are always some people with strange fetishes, especially when it comes to sex. Like, every time Yi Qingyu made love to me, she would ask me to strangle her. At first, I couldn’t accept this kind of play, but later I found that this game did bring new feelings to my sex life.” Xiao Lin stopped and looked at me carefully.
"But one time I made a mistake. I was too engrossed in my orgasm and didn't expect to accidentally kill Yi Qingyu."
"How can you even offer such an explanation?" I couldn't bear to listen anymore. "Xiaolin, you're shameless."
"I'm telling the truth. Whether you believe me or not is up to you." Xiaolin looked completely unconcerned. "But you've piqued my interest, so you have to listen to the end."
I had no other choice but to continue.
"Although it was an accidental killing, I didn't feel too guilty because I finally discovered another kind of pleasure. I felt like a praying mantis, devouring the man immediately after intercourse. I thought this was really cool, and I've been doing it ever since."
"You mean you keep killing people for your own pleasure!" Xiaolin's statement left me speechless.
"That's right!" Xiaolin nodded. "I discovered that only in this process can I truly enjoy the pleasure of sex."
I was speechless. This behavior couldn't be described as just insane.
“So I constantly entice my prey—note that I used the word 'entice'—because I hate the feeling of forcing others. I want my prey to willingly give everything for me.”
“You killed for your own pleasure, and also harmed Chen Yizhi?”
“That’s another coincidence.” Kobayashi’s tone carried a cold indifference: “It just so happened that I found his diary. And that’s even funnier. Chen Yizhi personally brought the diary to talk to me, and it was because of this diary that we got to know each other better.” Kobayashi laughed loudly.
“But he never imagined that this would lead him to such an irredeemable state.”
“So you used your position to extract Chen Yizhi’s semen and leave it at the scene, shifting all the blame onto him. Combined with Chen Yizhi’s diary, everyone believed he was the culprit.”
“You’re only partly right.” Kobayashi lit another cigarette: “But it’s already quite remarkable. It proves your intelligence is superior.”
I didn’t know if Kobayashi’s words were praise or criticism, but I was certain he had more to tell me than I knew.
“But you’d never guess how I used you.” Kobayashi pursed his lips, looking at me. “Last time, when the police suspected me, if you hadn’t helped me prove my alibi, I might still be in trouble!”
“I don’t understand.” I shook my head desperately. “I really don’t understand!”
“That day I didn’t ask you to go to the bar.” Kobayashi’s face was very close to mine, and I looked away in disgust.
“So what?” I said with a tone full of disgust.
“When I asked you to come to the bar that day, I said it was nine o’clock, but it was actually past ten.” Kobayashi said, “I know you never wear a watch, so your habit helped me a lot.”
I never thought I would unintentionally make this pervert.
“But the troublesome thing is that the owner of that hotel was the only one who knew the time, so I had to kill that old gay man. Damn it, I had to sacrifice my ass for this.” Kobayashi could talk about murder so casually, as if it were just going to a convenience store to buy instant noodles.
“Just explain yourself!” I thought he probably had a lot of things he was hiding from me.
"If you want to know, of course there's more! Like, your lab caught fire! And they slandered you in front of Xing Yang!" Xiaolin said nonchalantly.
I really didn't expect Xiaolin to betray me like this; I had been clinging to the hope that it was all just a misunderstanding.
"Xiaolin, I considered you such a good friend, and you actually..." I really didn't know how to continue.
"If you hadn't kept trying to find out the truth, if you hadn't taken it upon yourself to hack into my computer, I think I would have always considered you my good friend."
"What about Xiao Ai in Chen Yizhi's diary?" I suddenly thought of the missing Xiao Ai, and I had a feeling that she had already fallen victim to Xiaolin's cruelty.
"You mean that arrogant girl? Yeah, she was a very sweet experience. I never imagined she'd be so lewd in bed. She wanted to try every position, and the best was when I was behind her. The feeling of my penis filling her and her big breasts being squeezed in my hands was so incredibly pleasurable. We did it five times that night. Honestly, I was a little reluctant to kill her!"
It seems Xiaolin really took Chen Yizhi's diary as a guide. This reminded me of my high school teacher.
"Please, when I found her, she was an old woman! Her body was so swollen, she didn't look like the person described in the diary at all." Xiaolin's tone was full of anger as she said this.
Okay, all my doubts have been clarified, almost all my deductions are correct, and almost all my premonitions have come true, but I never imagined that the beginning of the truth would be the end of my life.
"Alright, that's the end of the story!" Xiaolin smiled again. "Xiao Mao, I really feel sorry for you. I never thought you would end up like this." Xiaolin pointed the gun at my chin, forcing me to stand up.
I must admit I was terrified. As the cold gun barrel pressed against my jaw, I felt a tingling sensation in my testicles.
"Like being bitten by a poisonous snake, isn't it?" Xiao Lin smiled, but I knew a deep malice lurked behind that smile.
"This story teaches us that the world isn't so easy to navigate! All that bullshit logic is just logic; it can never represent the world or explain everything. If you believe it, you're incredibly stupid!
Just like you now, Xiao Mao, you're a victim of this lesson." Xiao Cai looked very smug.
I didn't speak, just stared blankly at Xiao Lin.
“Xiao Mao, this could have been none of your business. We could still be good friends. But you insisted on figuring everything out, so this whole mess is your own doing. If you were just doing research, if you were just writing reports, I absolutely, positively wouldn't have done anything to you. But you had to be so serious, you had to figure everything out, and now look what happened.”
“But the fault lies with you.” Xiao Lin’s words angered me: “If you hadn’t killed Yi Qingyu, if you hadn’t committed a series of murders, none of this would have happened.”
“Look at you, here we go again.” Xiao Lin waved her hand dismissively: “You think this world is too easy. Constantly digging into the root of the problem only hurts yourself, and it’s dragged H down with you.” As Xiao Lin spoke, she approached H.
I started to worry about H. Xiao Lin grabbed H’s hair and pulled her head up.
“Xiao Mao, let me ask you a question. Did you sleep with this bitch?”
Faced with Xiao Lin’s question, I was momentarily speechless, but I saw disappointment in his eyes. I was puzzled as to why he reacted this way.
“Looks like you really did sleep with her! Xiao Mao, you really disappoint me. You actually wanted to wear such a worn-out shoe.” He gripped H’s hair even tighter.
“Let her go!” I shouted angrily. “Did you hear me? I told you to let her go.”
“Is that so?” Xiao Lin smiled sinisterly. “I’d like to see what you can do to protect her.” He released his grip on H’s hair and walked towards me.
“I was just feeling sorry for you. Do you know why?” Xiao Lin pointed his gun at my chest.
I didn’t answer.
“Because I really feel that not having slept with you is the biggest regret of my life.”
Xiao Lin suddenly grabbed my buttocks. “Really, I really want to see what it’s like when you’re inside me.”
I felt my whole body tremble. I angrily pushed his hands off my buttocks.
“I knew you wouldn’t agree,” Xiaolin said with a bitter smile. “But because I truly love you, I’ve hesitated to make a move. But today, you’ve forced me to make a decision that will cause me immense pain.” Xiaolin looked at me with a sorrowful expression.
He took out handcuffs and cuffed me to the window frame. Then he walked towards H.
I had a bad feeling. “Xiaolin, what are you doing?” I couldn’t help but shout.
“I’m going to make you truly taste the feeling of pain.” After saying this to me, Xiaolin turned and ripped off the tape tightly wrapped around her mouth. After a scream, I saw H’s pained expression and heard her shrill scream.
“Watch and listen carefully,” Xiaolin said. “See how I will satisfy H and you.”
After saying this, Xiaolin immediately started tearing off H’s shirt. The sound of tearing fibers and H’s screams blended into an unbelievable timbre. After tearing open H's top, her round breasts bounced out like springs. Although H's breasts were tightly covered by a white bra, this only accentuated their size and didn't detract from her beautiful figure.
Amidst wild laughter, Xiaolin forcefully pulled off H's bra. H let out a groan, and her two mounds swayed even more brazenly. Good heavens! This sight was an irresistible temptation for any man.
Xiaolin squeezed H's breasts, his tongue moving over her areolas.
"How's it going? Xiao Mao! Are you feeling it too? When you're with her, do you taste her breasts like this?" Xiaolin said, tightening his grip. H would shrink back and arch her back, constantly writhing. Looking at H's pained expression with her eyes tightly closed, I felt a pang of pain in my heart, but amidst this pain, a desire stronger than ever stirred within me.
Xiaolin quickly pulled down H's pants, her long legs and full buttocks sinking tightly into the chair.
“Look! Little Mao! Let’s let these thighs lead us to the most mysterious place a woman can be.” Xiao Lin lifted H’s thighs, his tongue resting on her calves. He began to move it gently, and H let out soft moans.
Seeing this, every pore on my body was almost bursting with urges, each one contracting, making my heart race.
Xiao Lin’s tongue stopped at the base of H’s thighs. He glanced at me and immediately tore down her last line of defense. As if to give me a better view, he pulled the seat from the side to face me, revealing H’s dark forest right in front of me. Xiao Lin leaned in, and I believe he was licking H’s vulva with his tongue. If Xiao Lin hadn’t been holding down H’s thighs, they would have kicked out. Then Xiao Lin pulled out his penis and pressed it against H’s vulva. He didn’t go in; he just looked at me.
"Beg me! Xiao Mao!" Xiao Lin said, "Beg me to fuck her! I know you're waiting to see my magnificent entrance."
"You pervert!" I cursed, "Let her go! Otherwise, I'll never let you off the hook."
"Haha." Xiao Lin laughed, "Xiao Mao, you're really pathetic. Why are you pretending so hard? Look at your penis, it's already swollen beyond belief. Your body has already told me your answer."
"What you want me to do most right now is this!" After saying this, Xiao Lin thrust his waist forward, and H let out a howl. Then Xiao Lin began to slowly thrust in and out, "Xiao Mao, since you won't admit your feelings, I won't tease you anymore. I'll help you and let you enjoy the most wonderful visual experience in the world."
Xiao Lin said as he quickened his movements.
The creaking of the chair and H's cries intertwined in my body, creating a carnal symphony. With each of Xiao Lin's intense thrusts, my heart vibrated, like a resonance, as if we were merging into the score of sex.
“Yes… Xiao Mao… that’s the expression, enjoy… this… all of it: remember… the climax is everything, remember well… the climax is… what we… are pursuing.” Xiao Lin said breathlessly.
I didn’t know whether I should feel ashamed or excited. The woman I loved was being ridden, and I was actually enjoying it from the bottom of my heart! God, what was happening!
Finally, everything stopped. Xiao Lin trembled and collapsed on H’s body. At the same time, I ejaculated, spraying all my semen into my underwear. I thought of the scene when my mother and father were with prostitutes when I was a child. I thought that maybe my father also got his sexual climax in this kind of behavior. They were just enjoying sex in a different way, just like what happened to me, Xiao Lin, and H today.
After resting for a while, Xiao Lin slowly walked towards me.
"Now you know the power of sex! Before it, no matter how rich your knowledge or how noble your morality, you will ultimately succumb to its power."
Faced with Kobayashi's words, I had no intention of refuting them. It wasn't that I agreed with him, but rather that I simply didn't know what to say.
"Now, the remaining task is to finish you off." Kobayashi picked up his pistol, pointing the muzzle at my forehead: "I'll repeat myself, I really don't want to kill you, but I have no choice. For my future enjoyment, today I have no choice but to take your life and H's!"
Looking at the gun barrel pressed against my head, I think I had already accepted my fate.
Game over! These words suddenly appeared before my eyes, and then, just as suddenly, an angel descended from the sky.
"Sorry, your time is up! If you wish to continue the game, please save your current progress and contact the counter after exiting the system. Thank you for your patronage. Please place your 3D monitor on the shelf to the right of the exit. Thank you for your cooperation! Thank you again for your patronage!" After the angel finished speaking, the entire scene instantly went dark. I blankly removed the 3D monitor.
"Damn it! We were already at the very end, and the computer only just said time was up! This is clearly just trying to get me to spend more money!" I muttered as I walked out of the game booth. Kobayashi immediately came to greet me as soon as I came out.
"How was it! Was it fun?" Xiaolin was even more excited than me. "I told you so! This new game is really exciting, isn't it!"
"Exciting my foot!" I tapped Xiaolin on the head. "Damn it, we were almost at the end, and they still kept saying the time was up. It's obviously a scam!"
"That's how it is! They're in business! The important thing is how good the game is!
If it's worth it, then spending more money is worth it," Xiaolin said.
"What you said is true!" I said. "I didn't expect virtual reality to get better and better. Just now, I was really prepared to be killed!"
"Technology! Technology!" Xiaolin exclaimed. "We live in the age of technology now. These effects should get even better in the future!"
"Right!" I replied casually.
"Alright, we've had enough! Next time, let's find some newer games of the same type," Xiaolin said happily.
"No way!" I immediately rejected Xiaolin's invitation. "I can play for real, why rely on virtual reality?"
"Don't be like that! There are plenty of women in the computer better than Xiaoyue!" Xiaolin smiled wickedly.
"No need!" I pushed Xiaolin away.
"Fine!" Xiaolin gave up on persuading me. I stared blankly at the crowd leaving the computer game center. And in that instant, I seemed to really see H, Yang Zhihong, and Chen Yizhi!
[The End
]

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The Age of Technology (also known as The Desire Program)

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