[I Started Being Lewd Behind My Boyfriend's Back] (Revised Version) (Confusing Sex and Love) (Post-03) Author: Makeface

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23

Author: makeface
Word Count: 4033

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Chapter 3 (Part 2)

I unbuttoned my shorts and gently placed my right index and middle fingers on my clitoris through my underwear,
trying to recall some intimate moments with Xiao Cheng. However, after rubbing for several minutes, my lower body
didn't react at all.

"Don't think about him... it's all just sexual fantasy, why think about him? How boring..." Yu Jie suddenly said.

I didn't know if I was shy because I was being watched while masturbating or annoyed because my thoughts were being seen through, so I could only say coquettishly:
"Ugh, don't look!"

"Okay... I won't look... I won't look..."

But Yu Jie's words reminded me that even Xiao Cheng's various seductions had no
effect . Could it be that just thinking about Xiao Cheng in my head would make me more attractive?

I gently placed my fingers back on my underwear. Suddenly, even though I was in front of my best friend, masturbating in front of a
man felt incredibly embarrassing, yet also... a little stimulating. As I thought about it, my fingers seemed
to find a rhythm of excitement as they moved on my clitoris, and various sexual fantasies slowly surfaced in my mind.

I began to imagine myself as a third party, truly standing there on that day of being massaged and teased. I
watched as the masseur, upon touching my smooth, white back, couldn't control his physical reaction.
While secretly touched his penis.

I watched the masseur caress my skin with his warm hands, massaging the sides of my full breasts, lightly
gliding over my inner thighs, and barely touching my delicate labia. My nipples gradually hardened, and my vagina
slowly became wet. I imagined him breathing softly in my ear, whispering words that made my heart itch, and I
unconsciously soft moan.

"Ah...ee...ah...um...ah..."

I was a little shy, but the thought of being an invisible third party made me unable to resist watching the masseur fantasize
about my body. I slowly slipped my fingers inside my panties, firmly touching my tender clitoris and labia, rubbing my clitoris clockwise with
my fingertips , slowly rotating them. Inside the thin panties, my labia,
from constant friction, produced a little bit of my love fluid.

"Mmm...mmm..." In my fantasy, I saw the masseur excitedly pinching and kneading my breasts,
and I cried out in response to my own moans. Especially when I saw his hands caressing my vulva, the
love fluid clinging to the edge was so clear and smooth, like the ceaseless secretion of a babbling brook, and I felt
so good.

"Mmm...ah...ah..." I started to speed up the rubbing of my fingers, while my other hand grasped
and kneaded . My white shirt must have been wrinkled from my gripping, because I felt my bra slowly
shifting out of place. So I started to unbutton my shirt one cleavage at a time, slowly
revealing the cleavage that attracted men's attention. My upper breasts felt the warmth and airflow outside the shirt
. Then I reached behind my back and unhooked my bra, exposing my breasts.
I gently cupped one breast in my hand and, against its natural flow, gently pushed and
kneaded it towards the center, imagining the feeling of a masseur grasping my breasts.

In sync with my fantasies, my hand gently circled my slightly hard, pink nipples with my fingertips, while the rest of my fingers supported my high breasts, kneading them with abandon. My honey pot, with the rhythm of the massage, brought abundant lustful fluids to my thirsty opening,
drop by drop . "Ah...ah...um...ah...um...um...um..." Just then, the massage therapist in my fantasy was rubbing his penis back and forth at the entrance of my vagina, and the opening of my vagina opened and closed, the labia majora being pushed open and closed by the penis, only the labia minora being barely held back by the overflowing vaginal opening. And I, invisible through the curtain in the middle, saw Xiao Cheng unknowingly enjoying someone massaging his shoulders, unaware that it was the moment when . The more I thought about it, the more excited I became. Although I was still a little ashamed, the sexual excitement brought by the imagination made me quickly pull off my denim shorts and underwear. I only felt my body slowly getting hot, and I didn't feel the chill from the removal of my clothes. My legs kept rubbing, so that the love fluid soaked every pubic hair near the entrance of my vagina, and my pink nipples stood up proudly under the stimulation. I watched as the massage therapist of my fantasy rubbed his penis back and forth against my vulva, slowly inserting it into my vagina. My labia, increasingly slippery, began to actively suck and envelop the head of his perfect penis, slowly and greedily devouring every part of it until it was fully inserted. My expression as I was penetrated was one of such satisfaction, comfort, and lewdness. "Mmm...mmm...good...hard...mmm...mmm...mmm...ah..." Gasps echoed throughout the room, filling the clinic with the rhythm of my sexual fantasies. Wearing only an open white shirt, my eyes were tightly closed. Apart from the moans , the only thing in the air was a decadent atmosphere. "Ah!~...ah...mmm...ah...ah...ah...ah..." I cried out wantonly, imagining his penetration. My breasts were already deformed from being kneaded by his hands, and my vagina contracted with each increasingly rapid stimulation of my clitoris, squeezing out waves of my juices as if to compensate. I frantically teased my genitals, moving them up and down, left and right, rotating, imagining the pleasure of deep penetration. "Ah…!" I cried out, because I could clearly feel a thick, rod-like object entering my vagina. I didn't think much, I just desperately spread my legs to welcome this rod, which was like a rain from heaven. It thrust in and out of my honey hole quickly, very quickly, at a speed I had never experienced before, and my love . "Harder! Harder!…" I kept murmuring, as if commanding the rod, hoping it would bring me more pleasure. And the rod did indeed respond to my demands, each thrust hitting my cervix, a sensation of pain and pleasure that I couldn't extricate myself from. "Ah…ah…ah…enough…enough…I can't take it anymore…" The stimulation from my lower body was unbearable, and I could only desperately beg the rod for mercy.

"Huff...huff..." After the vibrator stopped, I breathed heavily, my face flushed as I savored the sex I hadn't experienced
in a while , slowly removing my blindfold.

A long, dark vibrator was swaying between my thighs, and I was unconsciously using
that thick vibrator, my wet vagina tightly gripping it.

"When do I put it in...?" I looked at Yu-Jie sitting beside me, immediately squeezing my legs together shyly,
covering my chest. "So...embarrassing..."

I slowly got up, picking up the clothes scattered under the chair, and, with my back to Yu-Jie,
carefully put on my underwear and shorts before sitting back down in front of him. In that instant, I felt all the pressure that had accumulated over time was
completely released. I felt refreshed, and a smile slowly returned to my lips. I seemed to have forgotten that I was here for
a psychiatric appointment, and even for a moment, I had forgotten why I was here.

However, upon seeing my "recovery," Yu-Jie appeared unusually grave. After a moment of silence, he
slowly said, "I didn't expect my 'hypothesis' to actually come true... I have good news and bad news...
Which do you want to hear first?"

Hearing Yu-Jie's heavy tone, my heart tightened involuntarily, and I began to guess
just how bad my situation was. But this endless imagination made it hard for me to breathe; I couldn't even imagine
how bad things could get, so I said, "The bad news..."

"Okay... But I want to confirm one more time, do you really feel better now?" Yu-Jie
frowned , confirming with me again.

"Yes... yes..." I said, my voice trembling slightly, yet I wondered if lying
would have been a better answer.

After hearing my answer, Yu-Jie sighed deeply and slowly said, "All women are the same; by
nature, they believe that sex and love are one. However, after that 'accident,' your subconscious
believes that sex and love must be separated. But you need to complete the pursuit of your id before you can properly pursue your ego and superego."

"What...does that mean? What id and superego?" I asked nervously. I knew that Yu-Jie would
only explain things in a deliberately obscure way when he didn't want me to know certain things.

He lowered his head to show his regret and continued, "In other words,
you cannot have sex with the person you love before satisfying your sexual desire. If you have sex with Xiao-Cheng for sexual desire, it means that you only have a sexual
relationship, and there is no love between you...that's what your current separation of sex and love is!"

I covered my face, unable to believe the words I heard, but I had to admit this seemingly
absurd conclusion. After masturbating, I did satisfy my sexual desire, and I really
didn't feel any guilt towards Xiao-Cheng. Am I...am I really like that?

"The good news is..." Yu-Jie said with a meaningful wry smile, "If you
'take care of yourself' before making love with Xiao-Cheng, you might be able to cleverly achieve the 'separation of sex and love' in your heart..."

"Hmm..." I felt that although I couldn't enjoy the process of sex with Xiao-Cheng, masturbating first
seemed to be a solution for the sake of love. "Thank you, I understand..."

That night, Xiao-Cheng's body seemed to have already sensed my 'recovered' body, and we had intense
intercourse , as if trying to make up for a period of emptiness.

So, I tried masturbating every night to satisfy my own sexual desire,
preparing my body for Xiao-Cheng who might want to make love that day, even though the process of making love was not as intoxicating and satisfying as before,
I only thought: for love, it's okay.

However, I gradually found that even if I masturbated two or three times a day, I began to be unable to be intimate with Xiao-Cheng again.

So, my body slowly returned to the state before I went to the doctor.

"I think Jiang Yujie is a complete quack..." Xiaocheng cursed angrily, shaking her head. "Hmph... he can't even
cure a simple illness... and he calls himself a doctor? I think we should find someone else..."

"I..." I hesitated, then lowered my head in silence to avoid Xiaocheng thinking I was going to defend Yujie.

Actually, I shared the same confusion as Xiaocheng, so after finishing my antidepressants, I
secretly went back to the clinic alone and explained to Yujie that my condition had
relapsed .

After listening to my explanation, Yujie looked at me and asked, "Don't you think all of humanity should go extinct?"

I was puzzled and annoyed. Why was he suddenly discussing such philosophical questions with me?
What did this have to do with my illness?

Ignoring my expression, Yu-Jie continued, "I know you're wondering why I asked this... but
think about it, if every human knew how to satisfy their sexual desire through masturbation, then... why bother with mating? Speaking of which...

I think you understand..."

"So... that means..." My voice trembled slightly. I seemed to suddenly understand Yu-Jie's answer, "I
have to... with other people...?"

Yu-Jie didn't answer, only nodded meaningfully.

I don't know how much time passed, but like a puppet without strings, I slumped into a chair, unsure of
which way to go. How could I tell Xiao-Cheng about this? Sigh... I think all men are the same
... who can accept a girlfriend who is "only to be admired from afar, not to be touched"?

But... but I don't want to give up. I want to be with Xiao-Cheng like this. We made so many
promises to each other, planned our future together, and I want to properly, properly realize every little
dream in that plan. But... what should I do? I slowly lowered my gaze to Yu-jie, who was standing with his head down. I thought…
I understood!

“Let’s… have sex…” I shyly mustered the courage to ask my male best friend for sex.
This was the bravest moment of my life. I knew that this was the only
solution for me to be with Xiao-cheng.

I would become a real Venus, born from a man’s penis and a woman’s love fluid. But she
united with the penis of the man she loved in pursuit of his love; while I united
with the penis of a stranger in pursuit of Xiao-cheng and my love. I think this is the true meaning of the Greek saying, “As long as there is the union of a man’s semen and
a woman’s vaginal fluid, there will always be waves of love.”

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[I Started Being Lewd Behind My Boyfriend's Back] (Revised Version) (Confusing Sex and Love) (Post-03) Author: Makeface

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