My sister from my hometown and her hometown

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23

After a dull thud, the Boeing 787, painted with a crab-like livery, landed smoothly. The crew
's English announcements, thick with Sanya accents, filled the air, a stark contrast to the swirling snow outside the window.
Awakening from a daze, I first forced a yawn, then spent a full fifty seconds performing my "Lumia
5.20" activation ceremony, awaiting China Mobile's respectful welcome. Just then, I felt someone poke
my right arm. It was the young woman in the seat to my right, who hadn't spoken a word to me in 11 hours. She
was now looking at me pitifully, her gaze hidden under the brim of her pale pink baseball cap, as if asking for something.
"Uncle, could you help me? My seatbelt won't open."
I silently uttered the word "uncle," deciding to shave in the restroom after collecting my luggage. Of course,
I couldn't refuse a woman's request outright, especially from a beautiful young woman I'd met on my journey. Although I've never been
a fan of female students with ponytails, this girl was sweet-looking, and her youthful charm was just right.
Ignoring the fact that the plane was still slowing down, I bent down to unbuckle her seatbelt myself, and also
checked the breathability of her boots and socks. After a whole night's flight, they must have developed a certain odor. But
her breath couldn't be too obvious; it wouldn't matter during the flight, but once we landed, I had to consider
the dignity of Chinese law.
The unbuckle took less than ten seconds, enough for sampling. Upon closer inspection, there was only
a faint jasmine scent; she must have reapplied perfume during the flight. Oh well, somewhat disappointed, I helped her unbuckle
her seatbelt, not forgetting to stand up and give her a friendly smile: "That's all."
"Thank you, Uncle!" she said with a slightly shy smile, politely adding insult to injury. Looking at
her polite, even somewhat timid, demeanor, I completely lost the desire to awkwardly chat and add her on WeChat.
These young people these days... For some reason, the phrase my uncle always used popped into my head.
It seems I'm no longer young.
Dragging two 27-inch suitcases out of the airport, the cold wind stung my face, and I began to regret not going to the protest
last week —even if I'd been sprayed with tear gas and maybe even gotten bruised, at least I could have gotten a
mask, and I wouldn't be in this mess now. The promised warm winter sun was nowhere to be seen, and I'd even downloaded the
hometown weather app, which was full of ads. My beloved hometown welcomed me back in this unique way;
I don't know if I've been particularly unlucky lately, or if the woman picking me up is some rare and auspicious sign.
Lost in thought about time and fate for so long, my spirit seemed to have
merged , so much so that I didn't hear the car behind me honking frantically, the sound growing louder as it approached. When I turned around,
the weathered black GLC43 was silent, but that familiar figure was already rushing
towards me.
"Junqi—are you deaf?" A tall woman in a beige trench coat angrily blocked
my way, her red lips slightly parted, her almond eyes filled with reproach, warm breath escaping from beneath her red scarf.
The metal pull rods groaned twice, and the suitcases fell to the cold ground. To prove I wasn't deaf,
I hugged the woman tightly, greedily absorbing her boundless warmth. Unlike a childish
moth drawn to a flame, she was my eternal sun.
"You damned Junqi, let go of me—you're freezing!" my sister complained softly, but made no move to push
me away, only placing her hand on my shoulder and adjusting my scarf, which was covered in snowflakes.
Long time no see, my hometown.
Sitting in the passenger seat, I habitually pulled down the sun visor to check my appearance, only to find
the vanity mirror sealed with two strips of tape, looking rather comical.
"What does this mean? 'Seeing is believing,' is it some new custom in your literary circle at the end of the year?"
I pointed at the tape, looking at my sister with confusion. Thankfully, I had tidied
myself so I figured I didn't look too disheveled.
My sister drove casually, just smiling silently: "The tape is to prevent you from constantly looking at
yourself and forgetting about me. With a vanity mirror, you can play with yourself all day—now that you can't,
you'll have to make do with looking at me for now."
I reluctantly pulled back the sun visor and began to seriously examine this woman. After not seeing her for several years, my once slender
sister had become slightly rounder. Although the weight hadn't yet reached her face, it hadn't reached her chest either—if you were to use a fuller cup,
she'd barely qualify as a C-cup. But I could already vaguely see the outline of her lower abdomen; she used to
boast . Her once slender thighs had become even more shapely, yet she hadn't given up on over-the-knee boots,
stubbornly testing their elasticity with her body, letting the fat on her legs bulge taut inside her black knee-high socks.
In short , she must have been eating too much takeout.
"I said, I'm showing you my face." My sister raised her eyebrows slightly, seemingly noticing my
focus .
"Your face is etched in my heart; it won't change no matter how I look at it." My reply wasn't perfunctory, but it still
earned me a glare.
Unlike the mass-produced, overly-sharp-faced internet celebrities, my sister's face was highly distinctive. Her chin was perfectly rounded, complementing her long,
slender neck. And unlike my thin lips, my sister's lips were extremely full, red and vibrant, almost
never needing lipstick to maintain an eight-tooth smile in any time and any lighting conditions. She often complained that
her nose wasn't high enough, considering it a minor flaw, but to me it was enough. Of course, her most captivating feature was
her eyes, so dark and bright that it was almost blinding; and her proud eyelashes, long enough to hold up several
snowflakes. For her, drawing eyebrows and eyeliner were superfluous, because heaven had already been too kind to her.
I happened to watch "The Crossing" before getting off the plane, and now, looking back at my sister's face, I can deduce that it was somewhere between
Yu Feihong and Masami Nagasawa, a maximum value in a long power spectrum
. This kind of spectrum analysis, which has the potential to objectify women, is certainly not my original idea. My ex-girlfriend once mentioned that my
profile looked somewhat like Lu Yi, but upon closer inspection, it resembled Hu Meili, and she even defined my bandwidth. In short,
she meant that I didn't seem like a straight man. This made me suspect for a time that she had secretly used my gaming laptop and watched the edited
footage as gay porn. To be honest, although I often discussed how to play Strappon with her, and occasionally...
Speechless after being interrupted, I still consider myself a standard heterosexual.
"Have you looked enough? We'll be charged after three and a half minutes." My sister started slowing down, clearly noticing the long line of trucks at
the tollbooth .
Looking at the two rows of large trucks lining the tollbooth, I suddenly had the
illusion . Only when the BYD in front of me stopped moving did I lower my raised left hand. Although the car
was warm enough, wasting time like this was still a bit annoying, after all, the only one worth waiting for was my sister.
And now she was beside me, looking at the heavy snow outside the window, silently breathing in the exhaust fumes from the external air intake.
"Hey Tiange, is it always this congested at the end of the year? And why didn't Uncle consider getting an ETC
?"
I impatiently switched off the sentimental "Right Here
Waiting," only to find the next song was "The End of the Road"—even though
we've reached the end of the road, I just won't let you go. Ha, another tollbooth song.
"No, it's always been smooth sailing in previous years. Having an ETC doesn't make much difference. It's just that this year, with you back,
the traffic is so bad it's impossible to move. The reason is probably because you're a once-in-a-century auspicious omen." My sister smiled mischievously at me,
her lips curling into a smile. "Also, we're both adults now, so you can't call me Tiange anymore."
My sister's real name is Xiang Li, but I've always liked to call her Tiange. Historically, the nickname "Xiang Tiange"
predates "Xiang Junqi" by a considerable margin—it's all thanks to Luo Binwang's doggerel, coupled with the quirky illustrations in elementary school textbooks
. When the whole class recited "Ode to the Goose," they would involuntarily look at my sister, and the nickname "Xiang Tiange" was born amidst
laughter .
History proves that giving women nicknames comes at a price. Afterwards, in every ancient poetry recitation, some classmates
would write "Qu Xiang Xiang Tiange," while my sister was undefeated, successfully becoming the class representative for Chinese. From then on, she
steadily progressed towards a major in Chinese literature.
In contrast, my nickname wasn't so elegant. "Xiang Qi" sounds like "chess," inevitably leading to some misinterpretations.
It wasn't until junior high, after consulting my parents, that I decided to choose a more normal name for myself. Teenagers with high school syndrome
love popular history books with fighting and violence. I was reading "Those Things About the Ming Dynasty" at the time, so I pretended to be a member of the Ming
imperial family and changed my name to Xiang Junqi, following the order of wood, fire, earth, metal, and water—anyway, my dad's name had the earth radical.
A game of Chinese chess was already lively enough, but now with the addition of a game of military chess, my name became
even more . During self-study time, I was constantly being chased down and subdued by the students in the back row of the classroom, keeping me incredibly busy. These
two nicknames made my adolescence unbearably irritable. I was constantly immersed in the teasing of being called "Commander" and "Engineer
," to the point that now, whenever I see a chessboard, I want to overturn it.
"Thinking nonsense again, aren't you?" My sister gently tapped my head, looking at me with some concern. It seemed
I was wearing my thoughts on my sleeve. "You were laughing and joking just now, why are you so sullen now?
It's just a nickname, call me whatever you want, I don't care. Or... is this what they call homesickness
?" "No, not really, I was just thinking about the past." I quickly added a carefree, awkward laugh
to avoid upsetting my sister. "When I left here, I was just a brat, and now I'm a middle-aged man. Fortunately
, you're still as beautiful as ever, which makes my hometown feel somewhat familiar. Don't return home before you're old..."
"Nonsense. Wealth without returning to one's hometown is like wearing brocade at night—where do you put the Xiang family's ancestral precepts?"
Although my sister was still arguing with me, her tone had become much cheerful, and her eyes gleamed with pride.
"And another thing, don't use those low-level lines you use on young girls to try and manipulate your sister. Aren't you childish?"
Despite saying this, her expression clearly showed she was quite pleased. But can this really be considered a manipulation? Satisfying a woman's vanity is
at best just polite flattery. "By the way, speaking of manipulation, how are things going with you and your girlfriend?" Unfortunately, her sister still steered the conversation in a way that left everyone speechless. "We broke up." I tossed my head nonchalantly, leaving her with a stubble-covered chin. "A clean , no more boring stuff." My sister scoffed, dismissing my flippant attitude. "You make it sound so easy. Looks like you never really had any feelings for her. Better to break up sooner rather than later, saves me from hurting some young girl." "Love is about mutual affection. When the time is right, it ends. If it's not working out, of course you should separate. How is that hurting someone? Forcing yourself to stay together out of some sense of responsibility only hurts each other. Ending is the responsible thing to do." My sister seemed to remember something, her face darkening. "Besides, to be honest, my ex-girlfriend's approval rating is a whopping 75%, far higher than the average for divorced young men in China." My sister has been single for many years, and I'm genuinely worried she might be psychologically unstable, so I need to use data to maintain my image. "What do you mean by 'seeking truth from facts'? Seventy-five percent! Could you be any more shameless?" My sister slammed her fist on the steering wheel in anger, her thunderous roar echoing across the overpass. A clap of thunder startled the car in front of us, and the BYD SUV ahead swerved forward. Its flimsy body, even if it was a low-end fake SUV, was something we couldn't afford to mess with. As someone who studies Chinese, I hate all kinds of data; I regretted not thinking of that earlier. Realizing her lapse in composure , my sister calmly smoothed her dark, shiny hair, crossed her ample arms, and looked up at the roof, waiting for me to give her a way out. So, I wisely opened my backpack, pulled out a 100ml bottle of Dior Savage that I had prepared beforehand, and solemnly held it above my head with both hands, waiting for my sister to look down and inspect this offering. "Xiang Qi was just being disrespectful and insubordinate. Please punish me, sister." I knew she'd been watching those brainless period dramas for years, so I simply abandoned my irrelevant shame and played along with her role-playing game. But strictly speaking, this scenario made no sense — I was the one who was dumped, and besides, she didn't even know what my ex-girlfriend looked like. Did she even deserve punishment… ? "Tch, another one from the airport duty-free shop, right? One of those generic gifts, obviously designed to fool foreign guests . Were you thinking of giving it to whoever picks you up? It just so happens that I'm the one who picks you up."

My sister took the perfume box, didn't even open it, and tossed it into the back seat. Her attitude showed no
sign ; in fact, it became even more forceful. Small packaging is just not presentable; my ex-girlfriend was right.
With a long sigh, I reluctantly unpacked the carefully prepared gift box, tore off the exquisite inner packaging, and
carefully took out the black Guccizumi mini perfume, handing it to my sister's warm hands.
"I was planning to give it to you when I got home. Happy New Year, Tiange."
"Yeah. You too." My sister didn't even look up, only focusing on lovingly stroking the brand-new handbag,
playing with the glaring metal logo with her index finger. If that expression were captured by a street artist,
it would probably be another Stine Madonna painting.
I really didn't want to admit it, but I'd been tricked by this woman.
Caught in the chill, I returned home with my sister. My aunt and uncle were already waiting in the living room. After several years apart, my uncle
had become even thinner, with a few long strands of beard, giving him a somewhat otherworldly air, quite unlike those idle, retired
cadres . Looking at him, I figured he was probably too idle in retirement and might be looking for a
role as Lin Changmin in a period drama. My aunt, on the other hand, was still the same. She was much taller and stronger than my uncle, and always had a smile on her face.
Their huge wedding photo still hung on the wall. My aunt looked remarkably like Jiang Ying in her youth, and was said to be quite artistic, yet she was content
to spend half her life in her hometown, serving as the union chairperson for twenty years. As the fruit of their love, my sister perfectly
inherited my aunt's figure, nearly 1.8 meters tall in high heels, making me feel intimidated when she walked towards me.
"Xiaoqi, you're not leaving again this time, are you?" My uncle held my hand with concern, his eyes filled with
the unique enthusiasm of a veteran Party member. "It's good that you're back. The country needs young talents like you right now. Building
our own chips, our own large aircraft, our own aircraft carriers, breaking the American blockade—that's how we achieve the rise of a great power..."
"Dad, Xiaoqi is studying environmental engineering. He doesn't know any of those things you're talking about."
My sister, legs crossed, absentmindedly played on her phone while stuffing dried fruit into her mouth. At that moment, I truly
hoped no one would try to stop her, that she would just keep getting fat like this.
"Environmental experts are also highly skilled personnel needed by the country!" Uncle glared at Sister with dissatisfaction. "Look
at the Three-North Shelterbelt Project, it's been going on for so many years, and now it's yielding remarkable results. On the Loess Plateau, it's already—
" "Sigh, the news broadcast went on extra time again today. I wanted to check the weather." Sister chuckled, announcing that
she had finished clearing the room. She wiped her mouth with a tissue without caring about her image and went back to eating her yogurt.
"Uncle, I work in water treatment, so I'm afraid I can't make that much of a contribution to the country," I adjusted my glasses,
trying to appear as humble as possible. "As for the sewage treatment project in my hometown, I can handle that. I was researching and modeling before
I came back to China , and I think—"
"That's good. There aren't many young people willing to stay in small cities these days and work diligently for the people."
My uncle nodded approvingly, his eyes full of appreciation. "I don't like those kinds of people who, just because their hometown is a fifth-tier
city, desperately try to leave, wishing they could move their whole family's household registration. How can we achieve common
prosperity if this continues
?" Having said that, I obviously couldn't tell my uncle about my plan to look for a job in Shanghai. But I didn't like
to be evasive , so I continued to sit upright, listening quietly to my uncle's explanation of the current situation, nodding thoughtfully from time to time.
Thankfully, my aunt floated over with a fruit platter, like a beautifully crafted lead plate, placing herself
between my uncle and me, finally blocking out the endless stream of positive energy from the evening news.
"Xiaoqi rarely comes back, and you're already telling her all this," my aunt said, looking at me with concern, handing me the fruit platter
. "Here, have some fruit. You've been away for so many years, you haven't taken good care of yourself. Sigh,
you've lost so much weight, your parents will be so worried when they see you..."
*Snap!* My sister crumpled the empty yogurt carton.
"Auntie, you're overthinking it. They're busy repairing the base station, they really don't have time to see me. I'll
visit them after the New Year."
Going to Kenya after the New Year? Forget it. I don't like going to zoos. My parents
are having a great time , and besides, I'm not studying civil engineering, I don't want to cause them any trouble. Last time we video chatted, he kept
asking where my girlfriend was and when we were getting married—what am I supposed to say when we meet in person
? But my aunt seemed touched by my filial piety, peeling an orange while continuing to ask, "And also,
Xiaoqi, you're of marriageable age now. Tell your aunt if there's a suitable girl. Your grandma's always
talking about wanting to see Xiaoqi settle down."
"Then Grandma's gotta wait a while," my sister interjected, her yogurt container already receiving a crushing blow
. "Everyone knows our Qi is suitable for everyone, it's just that they're not suitable for him.
" "Xiao Li, how can you say that about your brother?" The uncle, having just been interrupted, was like
someone whose phone died halfway through masturbating, now having nowhere to vent his anger. "Look at you, you haven't had a suitable boyfriend all these years, and
you won't even go on blind dates we arrange! You're practically an old maid, and all your classmates are getting married and having children—some even
have two! You don't care at all, you're already this old, and you're making your mother and me worry about these things—
"
The sister stood up from the sofa expressionlessly.
"I've said it before, I'm a staunch advocate of singlehood, I don't need a husband. Modern marriage is so materialistic, wives are like
pets dependent on their husbands, in a completely weak position, what's there to envy? Besides, my household registration is in this godforsaken
place, my authority is already low, I don't want someone to control me." The sister said, already putting on her trench coat.
"Nonsense, how can a girl not get married? After Mom and Dad are gone, who will take care of you for the rest of your life?"
the uncle retorted.
"I—" My eager volunteering voice was drowned out by the increasingly heated argument between the father and daughter. My aunt
was caught in the middle, trying to persuade my uncle to eat fruit, then my sister to eat fruit; she knew that shutting up during an argument
was the best solution . "I won't eat
!
I won't eat! You were just complaining about me being fat, and now you're trying to fish for me!" my sister
lashed out, leaving my aunt completely bewildered.
"Fine, there's no way to communicate with you ancient relics. If it weren't for Xiaoqi insisting on coming to see you today..."
"I don't want to come back." My sister wrapped her red scarf around her neck, walked to the door to put on her shoes
,
and said, "Same as always, you two enjoy your time together, I'm going back to my place. The
car What's so good about living alone? You can't even take care of yourself, you don't cook, and when you're not working, you eat
takeout three times a day—"
The security door with the panda logo let out a crisp whistle, shutting out the modern-day Lin Changmin
from the April sunshine, bringing this inexplicable argument to a close.
I looked at my uncle somewhat awkwardly and tentatively asked, "Uncle, shouldn't I go and keep my sister company
this late? It's probably not appropriate for her to go out alone.
" "You don't need to go! She's spoiled rotten, she can't stand being told what to do. If you go after her now, she'll just
think she's right." "Let her stay alone for a few days." Uncle said this, but his attention
was fixed on the door, clearly listening for his sister's receding footsteps.
"Xiaoqi, don't listen to his nonsense, go on your way." Aunt was more straightforward, handing me the car keys and
nodding, "It's late, drive carefully. Remember to come home for lunch tomorrow."
"Okay, I'll go now, you all get some rest." "I didn't have time to express my respect for Auntie. I dressed in
thirty seconds , feeling warm all over, and headed out, hoping my sister hadn't gone far.
I wanted to fly.
I rushed to the elevator. In the dim light, my sister leaned against the white wall, her long, black hair obscuring
half her face, a red scarf casually draped over her chest. For a moment, I thought I'd wandered into the wrong movie set, repeatedly
reminding myself that Lianpeng Ghost Stories was next door.
"What's wrong? Why are you so angry?" I approached my sister, smelling the gardenia scent on her,
absentmindedly fiddling with her scarf.
"Just an excuse to slip away quickly." My sister smiled charmingly, her eyes full of smug
satisfaction at her successful scheme. "The night is still so long. Even if you don't need to adjust to the time difference, I can't bear to let you listen to
the news . But, my dad just nags a bit; he doesn't know any other way to express his concern."
"But if my mom chats with you for fifteen minutes, she'll definitely arrange blind dates for you, and the line of women will be
waiting after the New Year."
"I'm so relieved, my sister really loves me the most.
" "So we haven't been back for so many years, I don't even know if those nightclubs are still there." "
But I've never liked going to nightclubs. Even abroad, I only go with colleagues when absolutely necessary. The lighting
is secondary; I mainly can't stand electronic music.
" "Nightclubs? You weren't even eighteen when you left your hometown." My sister glared at me. "
Young people should be healthier. Let's just find a random karaoke bar. Qi Shao always claims to be the core of the music club,
let me see your talent." "
No way, besides, I've always been an instrumentalist..."
Although I said that, I really wanted to hear my sister's voice. "Let's make this clear, I
haven't listened , especially those about poultry farming, I don't know any of them."
"Poultry
?" "Ah, you know, the kind young people like now, like 'Chong Ya,' 'Ji Ni Tai Mei,' 'Ge Ge Ge,
' 'Qu Xiang'..."
"Roll!" My sister kicked me in the knee, snatched the car keys from my hand, and left me with a huffing
back. I rubbed my knee and chased after her, opening the car door to find her already occupying the passenger seat.
The five-line city doesn't have much of a nightlife, and with the heavy snow today, the streets were quiet before nine o'clock,
reminding me of my days abroad. Despite the voice navigation, I still didn't dare drive too fast—my hometown
hasn't really changed much over the years; the roads are still the same straight lines, but I'm still not used to
driving .
"Xiaoqi, your driving skills are really…it makes me so worried." My sister reclined the passenger seat,
lazily enjoying the heater. "You look like you just graduated from driving school, a complete novice. By the way, when you go out with your ex-girlfriend
, you never drive yourself, do you
?" "No, I'm just not used to it…and don't mention your ex-girlfriend." "I stared nervously
ahead ; there was a stretch of road without streetlights.
" "Oh, you won't let me bring that up again?" My sister perked up, sitting up abruptly. "Let's continue our morning conversation.
Why did you
two break up?" "It's because long-distance relationships aren't realistic, so we parted ways. I clearly told her I was going back to China. She
's still pursuing her PhD; it's too difficult for her to be there alone, I really can't wait." I impatiently brushed her off,
turning on the fog lights. "I don't know who it was, but she cried on the phone for four hours straight, insisting on seeing me—
it scared me so much I canceled everything and bought a plane ticket for the next day. Then there was a strike, so I had to pay extra to rebook until yesterday." "
However, changing the ticket isn't much of a financial loss. After all, I didn't
even have time to pack everything after the breakup, and I gave all the furniture we bought together to my ex-girlfriend. I'm not going to get entangled with a woman I once loved over such a small amount of money. "
My sister was speechless for a moment and fell silent.
"Xiaoqi... I didn't expect it to be like this..." My sister lowered her head shyly, avoiding my gaze, "
When I quit my job, I felt like I had no hope left. But Mom and Dad didn't understand me, and I couldn't find
anyone else to confide in, so... I didn't expect it to turn out like this.
" "Tiange, don't be sad, I never meant to blame you." I've been bullied by my sister since I was little,
and I've never seen her like this before. I felt flustered too. "Actually, I know that you've had a tough time these past few years. Besides your uncle
and aunt, no one else has been there to take care of you. There are also many things you can't tell them. Now that I
'm back, I'll stay with you." "
No, you should go back in a few days," the older sister shook her head, her eyes glistening with tears. "
I'd be content just for you to come back and see me once. But I can't keep you here forever. You're still young, you have things worth
striving for . Just like my dad described, small places can't keep people. I... I have nothing left to strive for
, I don't like it here, and I don't want to leave. But you..."
"I just want to be with you. No matter where I am, I have ways to make a living, but not every place has
a sister like me." I held the steering wheel with one hand and handed her a pack of tissues with the other.
"Besides, I can't go back there. I quit after less than a year of being a full-time employee; no company would
hire , and I don't want to switch careers to the internet industry. Besides,
I haven't canceled any of my accounts there; my credit record will be questionable next time I enter the country. Anyway, I'm not going back
." "
So, you've been...forced into this situation?" My sister's voice was very soft, almost
inaudible .
"No, I'm offering my all. No matter how good it is abroad, it's not as good as having my sister with me. No matter
how small our hometown is, at least here I can live peacefully with you." I smiled easily; the road ahead was
bright again thanks to the streetlights.
"Nothing else matters, as long as you're happy. My job doesn't pay much, and I'm a recent
graduate, so my annual income isn't even 40k yet. But after deducting daily expenses, I've managed to save up 240k.
These next few months, I plan to take you traveling around so you can really relax and forget about all those unpleasant
things . Once the money's gone, I'll go work at the waterworks."
I couldn't help but chuckle as I said this.
"If you're willing, come with me to apply for a secretarial job and help me write articles. We can commute together every day and live
a regular life; if not, you can cook for me at home. I don't want to eat takeout every day."
"If you don't like where you live now and don't want to trouble your uncle
and aunt, then we can just buy a 6+1 car in the new district. If there's no garage, we can ride bicycles." Making these far-fetched plans and dreaming about
life with my sister, my mood improved a lot. "Then, I'll have my dad pay the down payment. He's saved up
some spare cash and wants to buy a new car. Rather than showing off on the African savanna, it's better to—"
"Stop the car." My sister suddenly interrupted me.
For some reason, I braked suddenly and almost scraped the median. I turned around, about to ask my sister
what happened, but she threw herself into my arms, trembling like a wounded puppy,
rubbing her warm, wet cheek against my chest.
"Thank goodness. I still have you." My sister wrapped her arms around my neck and whispered in my ear. I gently stroked her back
with a touch tenderness, letting her bury her head in my chest,
comforting her in the most primal way, like soothing a child to sleep.
My sister had always been proud of her talent and had a high opinion of herself, yet she repeatedly failed in various major exams, much like
Li Guang who was never given a title. Initially, she failed the postgraduate entrance exam and refused to accept a transfer, so she gave up
the idea and instead focused on preparing for the national civil service exam under my uncle's guidance. My sister, a Chinese literature major, excelled in the essay section
, but the aptitude test was ultimately her weakness. She finally passed the exam on her second attempt, and was already twenty-five years old when she started working.
At that time, I had just completed my first heavy metal testing project, successfully transferred to a permanent position at the water company, and was starting
to plan my wedding with my ex-girlfriend.
After joining the government, my sister worked in the propaganda department. Dealing with soulless documents every day was already annoying enough, but she also had
to deal with her greasy, middle-aged colleagues, which was utterly unbearable. In less than two months, my straightforward sister had
offended all her superiors and colleagues, and six months later she was seconded to the county town. In a fit of anger, she resigned and happily
became a NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training). She didn't give up the apartment she rented for work, and she lived a single life, free from her aunt
and uncle's daily nagging.
She never confided these grievances to anyone; she knew no one would understand her, and strangers would only attribute
her career failure to personality flaws. Only I, thousands of miles away, witnessed how outstanding she once was and knew
that deep down she was a proud woman.
Actually, since her junior year of college, I had been worried about her. My usually optimistic sister suddenly became depressed for a long time for some reason
, and her boyfriend of many years broke up with her. Since then, she has
remained single, elevating her rejection of blind dates to a theoretical level—naturally, no
one can share her joys and sorrows, or stand up for her when she needs them. After becoming a civil servant, she constantly
fights against everything around her, without any support. She's like a lonely warrior, battling
something .
I saw all of this, but failed to react in time. I foolishly believed my sister was a
strong enough woman, yet I allowed her to suffer pointless harm time and time again. I had ample time abroad, yet
I preferred to waste it with my girlfriend, neglecting those who truly needed me. All of this fills me with shame.
I want to protect my sister. I should protect my sister.
After a long while, my sister finally lifted her head, her once bright and beautiful smile returning to her tear-stained face,
though her voice was a little hoarse: "It's all your fault, you made me cry. My voice is hoarse before the show even starts, what are we going to do
?"
"Then just lip-sync, it's not like it's an unplugged show..."
"How about we go tomorrow? Let's go home and play Chinese chess, okay?" My sister smiled playfully, "Chess is
fine too, my mahogany chessboard is huge, it's so much fun to flip it up~"
"No." I turned off the hazard lights with a blank expression and continued with the navigation.
As it turned out, my sister was still the same as when she was little, never making any plans beforehand. When we arrived at the only decent
shopping mall in the city, they didn't even have a medium-sized private room. I simply ordered a deluxe room, plus twelve bottles of Heineken, to flush
the rest down the sink.
"I have to say, you're really out of touch with China," my sister said softly, linking her arm with mine. "This
isn't even a fancy place. With that money, you'd be better off buying a high-speed rail ticket and going to Shanghai."
"My sister's still in our hometown, how could I bear to go anywhere else?" I lightly flicked her nose, and
the atmosphere suddenly became ambiguous.
"Oh, that's easy to say. You go and open the show. Just so you know, no English songs tonight."
I'd heard from my aunt that my sister failed her postgraduate entrance exam because of English, and now it seemed most likely true.
In that case, I ordered "Hometown." It has to be said, whether Chinese literature graduates admit it or not,
the power of music is a level above literature. Any form of creation requires immense passion.
Whether it's classical poetry or modern prose, the beauty of sound only requires adjusting the waveform; but music is different. Excellent
melodies demand extremely high frequencies and require the composer's ability to structure the composition. Therefore, if writers only need
unfulfilled desires, then composers are mostly hyperactive, otherwise they simply cannot sustain the energy expenditure during creation.
—You will always be my hometown in my heart.
Singing this line, I couldn't help but turn to my sister. I didn't want to admit it, but I was yearning for her
response . At this moment, I finally understood that the so-called homesickness ultimately comes down to the person—my hometown can
have nothing, but as long as my sister is there, it's worth abandoning everything to stay here.
After opening two bottles of beer, my sister slumped onto the sofa, her eyes half-closed, revealing no
emotion . Her boots lay casually on the floor, and she curled her plump legs in front of her.
Her body, which had been swaying to the music, froze at my gaze.
—That was you, gentle as water.
"The opening was so sentimental, how am I supposed to continue?" My sister sat up, seemingly still
savoring the melody. "How about a more upbeat love song? I want a happy ending,
the kind couples sing together."
"You're deliberately making things difficult for me. I haven't sung a duet in years." I feigned
helplessness , waiting for my sister's suggestion. "
Tch, you make it sound so serious. Fine, I'll choose one then—um, 'Hiroshima Mon Amour'.
" "Come on, even the East China Sea isn't safe for fish anymore. You want to go to the Seto Inland Sea and
absorb radioactive material with your body?" Besides, it's not like we can't find warm, clean water. I casually flipped through the list and
chose "Coral Sea.
" "You talk too much. I won't take you out next time." My sister pouted, picked up the microphone, and gently patted the sofa,
gesturing for me to sit down.
Naturally, my sister and I snuggled together, singing songs reminiscing about our high school days, occasionally exchanging glances.
These sentimental love songs, seemingly without real feeling, actually moved us deeply, even prompting us to discuss whether seabirds
shouldn't fall in love with fish and instead stay ashore to watch sand sculpting. It seems that getting old really does make one more sentimental.
After a dozen or so songs, my sister naturally draped her arm over my shoulder, her arms around me, sometimes laughing, sometimes
crying , occasionally nuzzling my body with her leg, the feel of her cotton socks and her faint scent repeatedly testing my resilience.
I felt her hot breath, saw her increasingly dazed expression, and knew what it meant. Worse
still, I knew I was about to lose control. Before everything spiraled out of control, I decisively stood up and handed
my sister a cup of tea. "Tiange, you're tired. Let me finish this, then go home." The sadness on my sister's face was fleeting, but I still caught it. She took a sip of tea, smiled calmly
and said, "Alright, I'll give you one last chance. Tonight, finish what you want to say to me." I took a deep breath, forcefully suppressing the sexual urges that had already taken hold. Only in this way could I reconstruct my true —unrelated to romantic desire, but solely the emotions that surged within me when I first met her. —In a familiar foreign land, I exiled myself year after year. —Through flowers, over thorns, all for a land of freedom. —In this city of desire, you are my last faith. —Pure white like a joyful ray of light, illuminating my heart. "I want to elope with you!" My sister's sobbing voice rang out behind me, just as I was speaking. But I didn't dare turn around to look at her, afraid I wouldn't be able to hide the tears streaming down my face. We're both middle-aged now; it's so embarrassing. My sister's grievances and resentment tormented me constantly. I really wanted to take her away from this heartbreaking place, to run away to a place where no one knew our past, to live earnestly according to the fragmented fantasies of our childhood, to reclaim the little bit of willfulness that had been taken from me. But I couldn't. Any man who fell from the sky could take her and elope to a place forgotten by the world's malice. Only I, the one who loves my sister the most in this world, didn't have that right. I was willing to forgive everything about her past, but I couldn't promise her a promising future. I thought I had carefree abandoned everything I could, crossing half the world to return to her side, but it wasn't enough to change the rules of the world. How could the fleeting emotion that arose from this replace a woman's lifelong happiness ? I really wanted to be with her. But I am her brother. The one I love is waiting for me behind me, yet I cannot turn around and embrace her. Overwhelmed with grief, I am speechless, gripping the microphone numbly, letting the chants of "Reject pornography, reject gambling, reject pornography, gambling, and drugs" echo repeatedly in the private room. My sister, however, quickly regained her composure, soon getting dressed and emptying the remaining beer into the restroom. "Xiaoqi, let's go." My sister leaned in, putting a scarf around my neck, and naturally took my arm. "Okay." I forced a smile, deleting all the prepared remarks I had made, numbly dragging my body in my sister 's direction. Reaching the corner of the front desk, I accidentally bumped into someone coming from the opposite direction. The person opposite me stumbled back several steps, but I was unharmed; the sister beside me seemed startled. "Tiange, are you alright ?" My sister composed herself and nodded slightly to me. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I was in such a rush, I didn't see you—" The girl stammered, backing away while apologizing to us. The metal chain on her clothes dangled wildly, making her look quite comical, which made me chuckle. "It's alright, we weren't paying attention either. Are you alright?" She looked up and suddenly smiled at me, her eyes sparkling with surprise: "Oh, it's you, Uncle!" I carefully examined this hip-hop style girl before finally peeking through the heavy foundation and eyeshadow to find a familiar pretty face: this was the girl who asked me to unbuckle my seatbelt on the plane. In just one afternoon, she seemed to have completely transformed, it was too dramatic. "You've changed so much, I didn't even recognize you." I suppressed a laugh; she seemed a little embarrassed. "Oh dear, I got an email from my advisor as soon as I got home today—my thesis passed..." The girl rubbed her hands...

She shrugged, her smug expression adorable. "But you know, Uncle, you've gotten quite handsome too. It
took me a while to recognize you..."
It seems being with my sister makes one's complexion better.
"You...know each other?" My sister looked at me questioningly.
"Strictly speaking, we're just..." I didn't know how to describe it.
"Ah, hello Auntie!" The girl only then noticed my sister standing beside her and quickly bowed politely. "
Auntie, you're so beautiful! Are you his girlfriend
?" "I'm not." My sister's brow twitched slightly. She turned and took the car keys from my pocket. "You two chat,
I'll go get the car."
Before I could stop her, my sister left with slightly tipsy dance steps. The moment the elevator doors closed, her
resentful gaze made me tense. The young girl in front of me didn't realize she had just inflicted
a mental blow on the pretty auntie; the exact damage, however, I'd have to measure with my own body.
After chatting for a while, I learned the girl was quite accomplished; she'd graduated with a master's degree before she was even 22 and was planning to go back home for
her doctorate after the new year. In a small place like my hometown, only a handful of people get the opportunity to study abroad, let alone someone so young.
If my sister hadn't been waiting for me, I'd have liked to go back to her private room for an encore.
"Okay, then, Uncle, hurry up, or Auntie will get impatient." After we added each other on WeChat, she started
urging me. It seemed this girl wasn't completely clueless; she'd done it on purpose earlier.
"Okay, see you later." I'd only taken two steps when I turned back and called her back, "Also, don't call me Uncle anymore
, my name is—"
"Hmm
." Forget it, if I told her my name, she'd definitely mess with me. So I swallowed the rest of my words,
waved, and got on the elevator.
I opened the car door and got in, only to find my sister had opened my suitcase, pulled out two bottles of liquor, and was now sprawled on
the passenger seat pouring herself a drink. She had her feet on the airbag, the heater was blasting, and the whole car
reeked of her, mixed with a strong smell of alcohol.
It seems you really can't call someone "Auntie" without careful consideration; this time, my sister was genuinely angry. To make matters worse, she seemed
unable to between wine and brandy; as expected, a Chinese literature major never checks the numbers when drinking. With a bottle of
Borgogne in her left hand and an Armagnac in her right, a century-long battle was about to
begin amidst the clinking of glasses.
"Sister... um..." I cautiously suggested, looking at my sister's flushed face, "Brandy
is quite strong. If you really can't handle it, you can mix it with some coffee or black tea. It wouldn't be such a waste..."
My sister leaned back, striking her signature crossed-arms defensive pose, and rolled her eyes at me:
"Auntie, I can drink it however I want. I don't need your stinky little brother to instruct me—by the way,
what do you mean by that? Are you looking down on me because I'm a country bumpkin
?" "Of course not," if I had been a little hesitant before, I was now blurting out,
my heart filled with only worry for my sister, "Drinking so much pure brandy at once will harm your health. It's not too late to stop now
. At most, you'll be a little dizzy tomorrow. Besides, how could I look down on you? I only feel sorry for you and pity you...
" My sister remained unmoved, continuing to refuel herself while pouring herself a drink and mocking me: "Ha, you
're quite adept at that line. You probably use the same trick to deal with those random little princesses in the business world, don't you
?" "I'm innocent. I don't frequent those brothels. Besides, that kid was someone I
met on the plane—a proper engineering master's student, not a princess." I proudly puffed out my chest; if I had the same red scarf as my sister
, I would have been floating on air.
"You men, you can't believe a word you say. Just one or two young girls and
you'll be exposed for who you are."
"What do you mean 'we men'? Everyone is born unique. I don't want to be categorized with anyone."
I somewhat grumbled, taking her wine glass and letting her gesticulate wildly at me. "Tell
me your address so I can use the navigation."
"I won't. Guess for yourself. It's somewhere along the river, not many streets." My sister turned her
face away, her breath warm with the smell of alcohol onto the car window. "Well, there's no other way. I'll just have to find a budget hotel nearby." I said, expertly searching for 7 Days
Inn on Gaode Maps . "No way. Budget hotels never end well, they're so annoying." My sister rolled up and hugged it unhappily. "Every time..." My heart sank. I hadn't expected my sister to have this habit. "Don't tell me you go to hotels to use Wi-Fi." "Of course I go for one-night stands. You know, hookups." My sister didn't even look up, openly revealing her secret. "I don't have a boyfriend, and I can't always suppress my sexual needs." "I never would have guessed my beloved Tiange had this kind of hobby," I said sarcastically, a different feeling creeping into my gaze as I looked at her body. "I've been wandering around abroad for so many years, and I've never had a proper hookup. It's a real regret now. " "Tch, I change hookups less often than you change girlfriends. What's there to be proud of?" Although my sister was a little drunk, she still sensed the sarcasm in my words and pinched my cheek in annoyance. "Then tell me, how many times have you hooked up with him?" My curiosity was piqued. "You go first, and then I 'll tell you about my girlfriend." My sister held up three fingers at me, her face full of disgust as she began to ramble on: "The first one was a short, fat, and sleazy corporate . I was lured to the hotel by his selfie, but as soon as I saw him in person, I lost all desire. I didn't even eat dinner and went straight home in a taxi. The second one was a programmer, quite handsome, but unfortunately, his tastes were too extreme. He insisted I tie him up before we did it. You know, I've never liked crafts, and after twenty minutes I still hadn't tied him up properly . He got impatient and just went to the bathroom to masturbate." " And the third one?" The feeling of suppressing laughter was too painful; I tried hard to bite my lower lip to keep myself from losing control. "The third one was a college student who looked a lot like you. I fell in love with him the moment I saw him."

My sister completely ignored my reaction, her eyes filled with pity, which instantly made me incredibly jealous. "
After , he told me he was still a virgin and didn't know anything—I put a condom on him myself, sat on him
, and guided him until we finally succeeded. But he ejaculated in less than five minutes and then started crying. I had to
comfort him while wiping him with tissues, telling him that men are all quick the first time. In the end, I
hugged him from behind like an aunt and chatted with him for the whole afternoon.
" "Sigh, men who only hook up are really unreliable. Luckily, I've never hooked up with anyone; I'm faithful and reliable," I
sighed .
"So, it was only after that that I realized that maybe I really don't need a man. Until now, I
haven't had sex with anyone for three whole years." My sister said, her voice tinged with sadness.
"If I were short, dark-skinned, ugly, and plain-looking, it wouldn't matter, but I was a legitimate candidate for the department's most beautiful girl.
All those scheming, manipulative, and surgically enhanced women have gentle boyfriends, but I'm the only one left. I—
"
"Wait a minute, Tiange, didn't you have a boyfriend in your freshman year? Why did you break up with him? You never
said anything." I shook my head, interrupting her endless rambling. "It must be because your standards were too high, and
you weren't willing to compromise."
"That guy in freshman year was my first love. We broke up in my junior year; he dumped me." Mentioning her first boyfriend,
a hint of hatred flashed in her eyes, sending a chill down my spine. "I was all prepared, ready to give
him everything. But something went wrong during sex. After he penetrated me the first time, he saw there was no bleeding, and then he
started to doubt me. He wouldn't listen to anything I said, and in the end, he just put on his clothes and left. That scumbag, I wish
him impotence until he dies.
" Hearing about my sister's harrowing sexual experiences over the years, I felt a mix of laughter and sadness, unsure how to comfort
her. My sister is in the prime of her life, a time when she should be fully enjoying wonderful sex and creating lasting memories with her loved ones
. Instead, she has been repeatedly hurt by irresponsible men, never even experiencing a complete sexual encounter.
Seeing my sister curled up in a ball, so upset, I really wanted to cheer her up. So I tried to change the subject: "Sister,
it all boils down to the bicycle or the vaulting horse in PE class. When I become Minister of Education someday, I'll definitely
abolish these sports equipment that threaten hymens and clear your name."
My sister, who had been looking heartbroken, suddenly sat up abruptly, as if electrified, staring
coldly I didn't bleed because of these things
?" "I have no evidence… I was just making a suggestion, nothing more—" "Stop pretending!
Why didn't I bleed? Do you think you don't know?" My sister's
tone grew colder and colder, her murderous aura seeming to want to slice me to pieces with her gaze. "During your
summer vacation when you were in the second year of junior high, the power went out at Grandma's house one night, and you've forgotten everything.
" "I... I don't remember very well..." I tried hard to recall. I had indeed
spent my sister, and we had many happy memories. "I vaguely remember that we spent the whole summer vacation together. As for the power outage—
Grandma's house often had power outages back then, so what's the big deal..."
*Smack.
* My sister, drunk, was much stronger and slammed my head against the back of the chair. I endured the pain on my face
but didn't dare to fight back.
"Tian Ge..."
"Xiang Qi, you're such a bastard." My sister glared at me with red eyes, trembling with anger. "Then
let me remind you again, Legend of Sword and Fairy 3, City God Temple, do you remember
? "
Hearing that, I remembered. That summer, my parents went to South Africa, and I stayed at my grandmother's house the whole time.
After hearing about it, my sister volunteered to supervise my studies, which was actually a way for us to escape adult
control. Every day, she'd pretend to help me with my homework, but at night, after the elders fell asleep, my sister would
wake me up to play single-player games with her all night long. Only intermittent power outages could stop us.
The computer at Grandma's house was left by my fourth aunt, who left it unused after marrying and moving away. Her master bedroom
became our midnight game room. Strangely enough, my aunt's game collection was mostly dark-themed—
Fatal Frame II: Crimson Butterfly, Resident Evil, and the Silent Hill series were obvious choices, and she even had antiques like Clock Tower on her computer.
My sister would never dare play these games alone; she could only make some progress when she was with me.
On my aunt's D drive, in a folder filled with travel photos, we unexpectedly discovered the game "Chinese Paladin 3."
I still can't understand why my aunt would like such a girly game; this is more terrifying than all
the games combined. My sister, however, seemed to have found paradise, immersing herself in the story and unable to tear herself away. From then on,
every night she would drag me along to fly on her sword.
"I remember now, wasn't that a scene we played that day? It was probably at the City God Temple at midnight, and Liu Shishi
ran naked out of a sword, and then she had a split personality, with the other personality constantly flirting with Hu Ge."
My memory is roughly correct.
"Nonsense, there weren't any TV dramas back then, and those two actors weren't in the game." My sister scoffed at my
memory . "Besides, the game's plot was much more explicit than that TV drama. We were at the most
exciting part of the flirting when the power went out."
For middle school students watching anime, the most annoying thing is the next episode preview. What's more, this kind of sexually suggestive scene,
abruptly cut off due to a physical problem, was simply unbearable for my sister and me at the time. Moreover, my sister had been writing novels since elementary school
and loved to continue the original stories.
"Yes, we were still discussing what happened afterward." I gradually recalled the details of that night and
felt incredibly ashamed. "Then...then you suggested that we role-play and
continue the storyline that was cut off by the power outage..."
I finally understood why I'd been so enthusiastic about fandom and role-playing all these years—
my sister was the root of all evil! I clearly remembered that I was the female lead that night, and she
played the male lead, letting me tease her—who told me to keep calling her "Tian Ge, Tian Ge"? I brought this on myself.
At this moment , I felt my face burning hot; it was so shameful.
"Did I even take off all my clothes and wrap myself in two sheets to recreate the role model?"
"...It's so embarrassing to talk about, I never want to remember this again in my life," and then there was a
needle that pricked my leg and drew blood—"
"Stop trying to downplay it, who told you to remember this?" My sister interrupted me impatiently. "Later,
how get on top of me and rub against me? Don't you remember
?" "That was part of the plot, besides, you wrote the script..." Recalling the
wonderful feel of my sister's youthful body, I suddenly felt something was wrong and dared not look her in the eye. "Tiange, could it be...
that day I...I really...rubbed...went inside
?" "Otherwise, where did the blood on the sheet come from the next day?" My sister's face darkened, clearly preparing to pounce again
.
"But...wasn't that my blood? That needle was so sharp—
" I absolutely refuse to admit that I damaged my sister's hymen. But once the door to memories is opened, it
can never be closed again. I truly can't forget my sister that night, her frail body, her soft
lips , and her warm yet dry vagina.
*Slap slap.
* After hitting me, my sister began to cry sadly. Indeed, the source of all her misfortune lay in
my rash actions. For many years, I considered my childhood memories with my sister as the most beautiful gift of fate.
I never imagined that at what I thought was an innocent age, I would cause my sister such immense harm.
I truly have no right to blame those who hurt my sister, because what I did to her was
the beginning of the tragedy. Until just now, I was trying hard to avoid recalling that time, lest I fall into self-blame.
I am such an irresponsible man. And now, the victim is sitting across from me, sobbing, and I—
*Sister. I'm sorry.* I roughly hugged my sister's burning body, letting her pound my chest and
push my head away. "It's my fault, it's all because of me. Hit me." "
Hit you... what's the use of hitting you..." My sister, having vented enough, gradually calmed down, blankly
combing her hair. "So much time has passed, I didn't even think about it, it was all just hindsight.
If I hadn't broken up with my first boyfriend over it, who would have known that thing was so important... I, I don't want to blame
you." "
No, you should blame me." I sincerely lowered my head, begging my sister's forgiveness. "At least let me
do something to make it up to you."
"How can you make it up to me? Are you going to contact him and tell him I've always been innocent, that you just
accidentally defiled me?" My sister rolled her eyes.
"I can't do that, and I feel he treats you badly." I shook my head. "How about I take you to get
corrective surgery? One of my classmates works at the hospital; a decent replacement would only cost ten thousand yuan."
"Roll!" My sister pretended to hit me again, but I dodged it this time.
"Then, how about you marry me? I'll take responsibility for you." I finally said those words, and instantly
felt as if all the ventilation in my body had been upgraded to the latest model, making me feel comfortable from the inside out.
My sister was stunned for a moment, then turned her head away, unwilling to look at me. Feeling relieved, I checked
the car navigation system's history, found "home" in the frequently used locations, and started planning the route.
"Lili, let's go home." I straightened my disheveled collar,
smiled , and started the engine.
My sister's apartment was less than 60 square meters, but thankfully it was well-equipped and reasonably warm. The government building was diagonally
opposite , and more than half the residents were newly hired civil servants. Since the government offices had only
recently moved here, and the single dormitories were still in the old city, the commute was incredibly annoying, and the housing allowance wasn't much,
so renting a place nearby was a better option. Thinking about my sister's previous quality of life, I suddenly felt that being a NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training) wasn't
so bad after all.
It was almost 11 pm when I came out of the bathroom. While drying my hair, I labeled the cups I had used
. What a vibrant day! If I hadn't slept well on the plane, I probably would have
collapsed in my sister's car
. "I'm...done washing up," my sister said, sitting at the bar in the restaurant. She seemed to remember something and started
reminiscing about the bottle of brandy again. "Listen to me, go put on some more clothes. Every winter, people die of pneumonia. If you died
here, I'd have to personally inform... Uncle Er, which is a real hassle.
" "Caring for others requires skill; otherwise, it's very upsetting to have your sincere heart met with cold water." I
smiled wryly as I put on a cotton robe.
"People who haven't been in love often think that as long as the motive is pure, even the harshest words are for the other person's good.
That's a huge misconception. Before I was in love, I didn't understand this principle either." This sounded a bit boastful,
but in front of my sister, I felt entitled to say it.
"Then tell me, what are your dating experiences over the years?" My sister finally felt annoyed, put down her glass, and
stared at me with interest. "Today I've been so busy listening to the old auntie's stories, doesn't Young Master Qi have anything to say
?" "Then you can take notes, otherwise the list is too long." "
Get to the point." My sister impatiently tapped her tablet, and the blank file that had been opened was bounced back. "My first love was Chen, a senior in our high school club. We all called her Sister Bo. She was a year ahead of me, but only three months older." My sister tilted her head, absentmindedly twirling the stylus, and
said
casually
,
"Chen Bo, what a strong name.
Her parents must have been cultured. Do you think about her every morning
?" "No, it's cold in the winter mornings, so I often don't think about her. Sister Bo was just a bit fierce when she played the drums, but she was
usually gentle with me—we formed a band together back then, I was on keyboards and she was on drums."
I hadn't thought about her for many years, and suddenly I felt a pang of heartache. "I also played two Dota games with her on weekends. She was really aggressive playing mid lane against Legendary players
, and she would taunt the enemy after spawn-camping them, so she often got reported." "
?" My sister looked at me blankly. As a newbie to the game and a complete noob, she naturally didn't
understand .
"Get to the point. You gave her your first time." My sister's writing style was always like this, getting straight to the point without any
beating around the bush.
"You could say that. It was the day of the city's cultural festival performance. She had just turned eighteen, practically a legal citizen
—after the show, since we didn't need to clean up, Sister Bo took me to the Hanting Hotel across from Liberation Square
to study vocal music face-to-face—"
My sister completely ignored my flirtatious remarks, simply pushing her wine glass away indifferently, a smirk playing on her lips: "Hanting Hotel,
you mean the scene was like a stampede of horses
?" "It wasn't that exaggerated. After all, it was my first time doing it from start to finish. Sister Bo didn't know anything, all she did was
endlessly complain about the pain—because it was at the Hanting Hotel, that's how that short story 'Horses Talk About Pain' came about."
As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. I caught a glimpse of the red scarf around my sister's neck and sensed something was wrong.
Although my sister had gained some weight in the years since I'd last seen her, her figure wasn't quite at the penguin level, certainly not
the mascot . And she seemed dissatisfied with my subtle pause, starting to look around, probably searching for two
paper cutters. Before she could swing at my neck, I quickly continued the conversation:
"
The first time was nothing special; I
didn't even last five minutes. Luckily, we both had common sense and used a lot of tissues to absorb the blood, which at least
protected that unfamiliar sheet."
I smiled helplessly, a self-deprecating laugh.
"I didn't expect you two to be so public-spirited in your early romance. Looks like our city's efforts in promoting civilized behavior have finally yielded some
results . And then, why didn't you stay together?" Fortunately, my sister wasn't angry; she just adopted a
more old-fashioned tone, vaguely reminiscent of my uncle in his younger days.
"After she entered her senior year of high school, the band disbanded, and we didn't have many opportunities to see each other. Of course, I'm
a sensible kid; I wouldn't keep bothering Sister Bo and joking about her future. Later, she suddenly
texted me, saying she was going to Australia and told me to forget her—that was the last time she contacted me, and I couldn't bear to reply." Yes
, that text message is still on my memory card; I haven't deleted it.
"I haven't heard from her since. She just disappeared. Like
a bubble on the sea, blown ashore by the wind."
Seeing my sorrow, my sister nodded, feigning grief: "That's fine. The memory of your first love stays in
your heart . Without hatred, there's no regret. What happened after that
? You dated a few more people." "In the second semester of my freshman year, I met Senior Wen from the student union. I had just started working, and she took me to
solicit sponsorships. The first time we met, I thought she was very articulate, and it turned out she was."
To be honest, if it weren't for getting my sister to sleep quickly, I really wouldn't want to remember that annoying woman.
"On the ninth day after we met, she confessed her feelings to me, and then she started taking me everywhere to have fun, skipping
classes and staying out all night. At first, I just thought she was knowledgeable, or rather, good at having fun; later,
the things she did became increasingly strange and dangerous, and I felt something was wrong.
" "Strange... what kind of SM?" My sister's interest was piqued again, her bright black eyes blazing with a burning
thirst for knowledge, probing with the most extreme words in her understanding.
"Not really, it's just very... unconventional, something I can't accept." I didn't want to admit to my sister that I had
smoked marijuana with that crazy senior, had my anus licked by her, and then had sex with her using various tools, and even had sex with her.
Losing my virginity to a woman like that made me feel uncomfortable.
"In short, I felt we weren't the same kind of person. When I found out she was dating multiple guys
online , I quickly broke up with her." I still have some self-awareness;
how could a mere mortal like me handle such a master of multi-line micromanagement?
"That's it... over. This relationship really started strong but ended weakly, no fun at all. No, you're just...
clickbait ." The older sister, not hearing what she expected, was quite disappointed.
"Well, since things have come to this point, there's no need for me to hold back anymore," I said, continuing to recount my
past relationships: "Shen, a senior in the language class, we were together for less than two months. She was supposed to be a senior, but she was so clueless, she
couldn't do anything right. I took care of her like an older brother, practically handling all her paperwork for going abroad.
She seemed a bit naive, which really evoked a man's protective instincts; she made my heart ache when she was hurt. It was only when I
was that I felt a bit of innocence; I didn't even touch her hand—
" Hearing this, my sister suddenly smiled at me, her breath reeking of alcohol: "Really, really rare.
Even our Qi Shao has his failures… Two months and still nothing. Regret…
?" "Not at all," I replied, "I think it's just right. This kind of relationship is a bit like parental love, just a one-sided
wish for the other's well-being. Seeing her happy makes me happy, and when I'm sad, I never want her to be sad.
This kind of happiness comes more from giving than taking.
" "That's great , I'm almost moved by my own words." I imagine my expression right now, like the winter sun, making
my sister feel hot.
"It's really...you've gone to so much trouble to describe a 'simp' so highly, so noblely." After a long silence, my sister finally managed to
squeeze out a comment.
Her harshness really made me a little angry, but when I saw the jealousy in her eyes, burning red with alcohol, I
realized I had gone too far. During the years when my sister needed care the most, I should have been by her side, taking care of her
daily needs and making her happy. But I hid abroad, letting her bear the immense pressure alone. Repeated
failures left her heartbroken, and even her boyfriend, who had been with her, had—
"No...don't talk about her. Let's move on." My sister was clearly struggling, pretending to be impatient as
she put her hand to her , but actually she was dizzy.
"Finally, there's Senior Ren from the lab, my girlfriend before I went back to China. I've already
told you a lot of things." Looking at my sister, who was becoming increasingly limp, I started to worry about her condition, afraid she might fall off the bar stool. "
Why don't you move to the bed first, and I'll tell you more
?" My sister didn't respond, just kept swaying her body, looking like she couldn't walk anymore. I had no choice but
to move closer to her, opening my arms wide, gesturing for her to cooperate. My sister smiled sweetly, leaning into my
arms and hooking her arms around my neck.
Sure enough, I really need to lose weight after the New Year; this can't go on. I struggled to hold my sister, trying my best...
I gritted my teeth and shuffled towards her bedroom to keep her from falling. It was never this difficult when I used to carry her in my arms like a princess;
carrying her upstairs was a breeze, let alone getting her to bed.
"You're really something, so many years of obsessively trying to hook up with upperclassmen, and they're all in the same rhyme group! I'll have to create a
new idiom for you... um... the plague god of Ren Chen..." My sister was still restless in my arms,
condensing my messy romantic history into a Wanli Korean War.
Finally, like a bomb, I slammed my sister onto the edge of the bed. Luckily, the alcohol had numbed her nerves, acting
as internal shock absorbers, so she didn't feel any pain—otherwise, I'd be sleeping on the street tonight.
My sister stretched comfortably on the big bed, lazily waiting for my cleanup. First, I took off her sweater,
smoothed out the wrinkles in her thermal underwear, then removed the swan silver ornament from her neck and carefully placed it in the jewelry box on the bedside table.
Finally, I managed to cover her slender body with a blanket, tucked the corners in, adjusted the air conditioner to 20 degrees Celsius, and placed a glass of water by
the bedside . A hangover and thirst—that feeling was nothing to envy.
After tidying up, I let out a long sigh and prepared to turn off the lights and close the door. My sister's living room was small, and the sofa
was a bit old , but it was much better than the cheap hostels I'd stayed in. I never liked to trouble others, and I always carried
a sleeping bag, even at my sister's house.
"Lili, goodnight." I understood the道理 (principles/reasoning), but I'm still a man, and I couldn't help but kiss her forehead
. Looking at my sister sleeping peacefully, like a masterpiece hidden in the hands of an ordinary person, I even had the urge to place her
in a sarcophagus for the world to worship. I was almost reluctant to leave.
This feeling was as surging and intense as lust, yet completely different. Lust
reaches and then subsides after release. This desire for worship is built on the absence of physical contact; once
contact occurs, the idol crumbles, and the world plunges into darkness.
Human emotions are countless, but ambiguity is the most misleading. I know my sister doesn't enjoy this ambiguity,
and she probably understands I dislike testing the waters. She's not brave enough, and shamefully, neither am I.
Everything that happened tonight was for the sake of saying, "I want you."
I was wrong from the start. I thought my sister needed me, and that I abandoned everything to return to her side
to save her life. Now I understand, it was my desire to live with my sister, to continue
the mistake of ten years ago—it was this hidden, burning desire that led me to flee this foreign land and return to
where I truly belong.
Xiang Li. I silently repeated it over and over, like an ancient ritual,
seeking protection, even wisdom and power beyond human comprehension, through chanting specific words. Now, as I recite my sister's name, I can
break through this timid body and face her with composure.
"Xiao Qi." My eulogy seemed to have worked; my sister slightly opened her drunken eyes, meeting my fervent gaze.
Everything was understood without words. In that instant of eye contact, I felt a spasm, an irresistible pleasure surging through my spine,
forcing a part of my soul out of my body.
Tell me, tell me quickly—you want me, you've always wanted me.
"Water."

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