Gossip about mature women

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-24

Unwittingly, I thought of Xinyi again. My dear Xinyi, you hid yourself so deeply, so deeply that I couldn't grasp you. Perhaps you will never belong to anyone in this life, perhaps you don't even belong to this chaotic world. I am just an ordinary mortal, unable to sense your divine mystery. You refuse anyone to enter your heart, silently blooming your beauty in the darkness, yet no one has the chance to see it.
Every day I spent with Xinyi was doubly precious to me. I always felt that she, like a drifting duckweed, would float away at any moment, perhaps disappearing the moment I opened my eyes. I decided to do something to commemorate our meeting, and after much thought, publishing a book seemed to be the most meaningful way to remember it.
I commissioned several books for Xinyi:
*The Setting Sun of an Empire—Lin Xinyi's Commentary on Modern British History*
, *Remembering My Childhood—Recollections of Taiwanese Mandarin Music in the 1980s
*, *Flowers Bloom and Fade, No One Understands—A Collection of Psychological Research Essays by Lin Xinyi
*, *A Golden Year—A Collection of Essays and Notes by Lin Xinyi*,
and *A Solo Song—Recollections of Taiwanese Independent Cinema*.
I suggested the titles, and Xinyi didn't change a single word. I hired the best design company for the entire book packaging. I personally oversaw the cover design, binding, paper, format, and printing.
I personally wrote the preface and afterword, and of course, my writing is also included in the books. We even held a press conference and did an interview program for it. Several writer friends who read it praised it highly, saying it should have been published long ago.
While doing all this, Xinyi remained noncommittal, as if she would never object to anything I did. On the day the books were released, I invited all the friends I could and used every connection I could. It was an unprecedented event; we signed over a thousand copies in one morning, leaving Xinyi's arms aching. After finishing and taking Xinyi home, she finally hugged me and cried, and nothing I did could soothe her.
"Yang, thank you so much. I don't think anyone has ever treated me as well as you have. I really... really love you, but I didn't dare say it. I knew it would hurt even more, but now I can't hold back anymore... I'm afraid I'll have to leave Beijing for a while. I need to go back to Taipei to see my parents. They're getting old, and these books will be a good gift for them. There's one more thing... can you promise me? I want to take a wedding photo with you. My parents hope I find a partner soon, and I don't want to disappoint them. I'm sorry, I know this request is unreasonable, but you don't have to agree, it's really okay." A sudden wave of desolation washed over me: Was Xinyi never to return? Was this our last meeting?
“Xinyi, I promise you, willingly. But you also have to promise me you'll come back, you absolutely have to. Otherwise, I can't bear it. I'll be unable to resist going to Taiwan to find you. I love you too, my love is heartbreaking.” Xinyi hesitated for a few seconds, then nodded firmly. She gave me her apartment and car keys, and left her address and contact information in Taiwan. Xinyi's psychological clinic was also operating normally, which put my mind at ease.
The day Xinyi left, Li Wen and I went to see her off. We hugged for a long time in the waiting hall, feeling like we were parting forever. Watching the plane take off, my heart left the earth and went with it. Watching the plane grow smaller and smaller until it disappeared into the distance, my eyes ached, but I still refused to leave.
“Come on, don't look anymore, you can't see anything.” Li Wen pulled me.
“Li Wen, thank you, you go first, I want to be alone for a while.”
“Sigh, two more heartbroken people in the world.” Li Wen sighed and left.
I sat in the airport lobby coffee shop for a long time, without drinking a drop of coffee, until it was completely dark before dragging my tired body out of the airport.

"Zi Dong, what's wrong? You look terrible." I got home at ten o'clock, and Jing Zhu asked with concern when she saw how exhausted I was.
"Nothing, I took a friend to the airport, and the traffic was so bad that I got tired. Get me something to eat." I felt much better after eating some frozen dumplings (Jing Zhu only knows how to cook frozen food and noodles). Actually, it was Jing Zhu's concern that made me feel better; when you're feeling down, even a little bit of care feels so comforting.
Because the book publication was such a big deal, it was hard to keep it from Jing Zhu. Fortunately, she knew nothing about our situation, so I had to take the initiative to explain it to her.
"This was arranged by a friend of mine. I thought the book was good, so I helped out. Oh, and I brought you a copy, signed. The author is a female psychologist from Taiwan. Don't overthink it; I don't know her at all. We just had one meal together." Jing Zhu opened the cover, and on the title page was written: Respectfully presented to Ms. Ruan Jing Zhu, Lin Xinyi. The small regular script was gentle and elegant; I had asked Xinyi to write it for me. " 　　Why did
n't you invite them over? I'd like to meet some Taiwanese cultural figures. The photos are quite beautiful," Jingzhu praised. "That's because I was afraid you'd overthink it." 　　"Am I that petty? I think you're the one who's guilty." It seems everything's alright now; I'll wash up and go to bed. 　　One Sunday, I was at home playing with the kids when Jingzhu stormed in, threw her bag on the sofa, and plopped down on it, bouncing high into the air. 　　"What's wrong, Jingzhu? Which 'bamboo shoot' (my nickname for Jingzhu's fans) has gone too far again? Don't they want to live anymore?" 　　"Go cool off somewhere else. Can't you see I'm annoyed? I don't know who's so wicked as to give me the nickname 'child bride,' it's all over the industry, everyone's laughing at me, and it's all because of you. Last time during the recording, Lao Zhang mentioned 'child bride,' and that was me. You kept it from me, what are you going to do about it?" 　　"I thought some bastard director dared to harass you. What can you do about this? Just ignore it. These things will naturally subside. This is nothing, every actor has faced bigger problems than you. Is this even worth getting angry about? With this kind of mentality, how can you act well?" It seems "good news doesn't travel far, but bad news travels fast." This industry is so dirty. 　　"You don't know, they also said... they also said... I can't say it, it's too disgusting." 　　"What did they say? What else is there to say?" 　　"They said... they said you sleep with my... in your mouth every night, and that at home we call each other sister and brother, kiss and feed each other during meals, and sleep naked. Isn't that disgusting enough to kill? No, I can't stand it. For over twenty years, I've never let anyone say anything bad about me. We've only been married for two years and you've caused so much trouble. You're a jinx!" She even started crying, feeling wronged. Who the hell spread that? They really have a vivid imagination. 　　"Really? That's so vicious! These women are so vulgar. But these things happen without a trace, so just pretend you don't know. Let it die down on its own. If it becomes a big deal, and gets to the tabloids and websites, that'll be troublesome. Those bastards will exaggerate it, you wouldn't even imagine, they might even make an SM version. Don't overthink it, learn from Paris Hilton's spirit, 'You disgust me, I just laugh it off.'" Damn, that's really outrageous. I really need to ask Old Zhang what happened, was he the one who first used the "child bride" nickname? 　　"Come play with the child, and you'll forget all the unpleasantness." I handed my daughter to Jingzhu. 　　Who exactly started this? Leng Ling? She doesn't have the time for that. Si Jin? She's not that kind of person at all. Sheng Jie? She's not in this circle, and besides, it's been years since I've seen her. Cream? It's not that serious. I haven't offended anyone else, have I? I racked my brains but still couldn't figure it out. 　　That evening, I invited Lao Zhang and Lao Wang out for dinner to try and find out more. As soon as I mentioned it, Lao Zhang and his friends laughed. "Director Yang, we've only heard rumors from others. Since we don't have anyone else around, and you're so talented, tell us, have you actually done this?"

"Damn it, you bastards, what do you take me for? I don't believe you guys even if you say you didn't do it. I'm fine, but look at Jingzhu, such an honest and good woman, suffering this injustice for no reason. I really can't swallow this. Don't let me find out who did it, or you can forget about working in this industry." Seeing that I was angry, everyone dared not cause any more trouble. They all knew my ruthless methods, and no one wanted to lose an arm one day. Old Wang was a notorious ruthless person in the industry, and he was my closest friend. It was because of him that I succeeded in getting things from Jingzhu for the first time, and I also helped him a lot with the approval process.
"Sorry, guys, it wasn't for you." I tried to ease the tension.
"Guys, tell me, has anyone in the industry ever done anything bad to Jingzhu before? Tell me, it's okay, I promise I won't reveal it." I wondered if it was someone who had a grudge against her in the past.
"Old Yang, we can tell you with certainty that Jingzhu is the most honest and law-abiding person in the industry. She had no scandals before or after her divorce. Everyone respects her and calls her Sister Ruan. She has a good temper, is kind, and gets along with everyone, but she's not particularly close to anyone. As far as we know, no one has ever had any romantic feelings for her. I swear to my deceased father, I really didn't have any romantic feelings for her, really. I never expected that you would marry her later. Good people are rewarded." Well, I couldn't get any more information from her. I'll just have to think about who I'll spend the night with.
"Old Zhang, you know a lot of people in the industry. There was a really popular spy drama last year, and there was a character called 'Sister Zhang,' who only had five minutes of screen time. I happened to see her on TV the other day. Does she look familiar?" I asked Old Zhang.
"I know a bit about her. She recently played a role in a TV series starring Xiao Sun, I think she's a flight attendant. She's not young, probably has kids by now, skinny as a dragonfly, and not pretty at all. Why do you...?" Old Zhang was confused.
"I don't care how old she is or whether she has kids. I'm asking if you can invite her over, you know? I'm really interested. You guys really don't understand aesthetics. What's so fun about young girls? They're so loud and boisterous, even more aggressive than you guys. That 'Sister Zhang' is really something else, a bit like Liu Zi, but more charming than Liu Zi. That innate coquettishness, those crescent-shaped eyes when she smiles, oh my, I can't even describe it, she's so alluring. She's much better than Xiao Chen who played 'Huang Yiyi.' I can't explain it to you guys. Old Zhang, just invite her now. Everything should be done efficiently."
"Damn it, Old Yang, are you treating me like a matchmaker? This pimping is going to be so embarrassing if word gets out." Old Zhang still took out his phone and made the invitation. He didn't dare refuse; the filming permit was still with me.
"Sorry, she can't come today. How about tomorrow? I've already arranged to meet her here." Disappointing. Fine, everyone finds their own wives and pursues their own pleasures.
The next evening, I invited a few real big names in
the industry, including Old Zhang, who was the matchmaker, of course. As soon as I entered, I saw "Sister Zhang" sitting inside. Seeing us, she quickly stood up, smoothed her hair, tugged at her clothes, and smiled somewhat awkwardly. I was quite nervous; I'd never seen anything like this before, not even at a film festival. "Sister Zhang" wasn't young either; she was probably a seasoned veteran like Jingzhu, but even more experienced. She was thin, a slender, refreshingly thin, exuding a captivating charm, unfazed by praise or criticism.
After we sat down, "Sister Zhang" naturally sat next to me. Old Zhang began his introductions: "This is the famous young actress, Xiao Meng, a true powerhouse. These gentlemen need no introduction; everyone in the country knows them. Oh, I forgot our esteemed guest, this is Director Yang, the head of our industry, our strong backing, who has made immense contributions to the development of our country's film and television art. He's like family, so dear to us!"
"Alright, Old Zhang, stop bragging. You're exaggerating. Xiao Meng, actually, I'm just here to serve everyone, a public servant, a public servant." Xiao Meng looked at me with surprise; he was too young, not like an official, more like a young master. Holding Xiao Meng's hand felt real; what "Xiao Meng," he was actually older than me.
"Xiao Meng, Director Yang specifically asked you to come today. He said he particularly appreciates your performance and wants everyone to help you more in the future—no, to help each other. You should thank Director Yang properly." A complex expression flashed in Xiao Meng's eyes; after all, he was in the industry and knew a thing or two about the rules. He quickly regained his smile, his narrow eyes sparkling, making my heart itch.
"Hey, you should have told me earlier that Xiao Meng was coming today, otherwise I would have brought something."
"What? That thing? Director Yang's style's changed to a rougher approach today, don't scare Xiao Meng."
"Hey, when will you ever be serious? The entertainment industry is in such a mess today, and you're half responsible for that. I'm talking about my blood pressure medication, don't you know? My blood pressure is high, and seeing such a stunning beauty like Xiao Meng suddenly made it spike. I'm desperately trying to calm myself down. If anything happens to me, you'll be the one to take care of me." I pretended to take a deep breath, letting out a long sigh, which made everyone laugh heartily. "
Director Yang, I'd like to propose a toast. You must give me face, or I'll cry. Thank you for your kindness, and I hope to receive your guidance." Xiao Meng was quite charming, handling things well, neither being coquettish nor absent-minded.
"Xiao Meng, you're too kind. How could I dare to instruct anyone? Everyone here is a master. Please give Xiao Meng more opportunities in the future. I was wondering why I haven't had any good works these past few years; it turns out that talents like Xiao Meng have been buried. Besides, the audience is tired of seeing familiar faces."
After the meal, everyone made excuses to leave.
"Xiao Meng, if you have something to do, you can go back first. If you don't have anything to do, chat with me." This was tantamount to getting straight to the point, meaning: Meng, would you like to go to a hotel with me? I want to sleep with you. I believe that getting Xiao Meng would be as easy as cutting melons and vegetables. She should even feel flattered. A woman in her thirties, with no special advantages (just that she suits my taste), without anyone to promote her, how could she have any chance to get ahead? There are a bunch of young girls waiting eagerly behind her.
"I'll do as you say, as long as you're happy." She was poised and decisive. I liked it. She was much better than some of those little stars who pretend to be demure first and then become like young ladies. At that moment, I wanted to grab her and kiss her first, but I held back. I couldn't seem too eager, or people in the industry would laugh at me.
We arrived at the long-term private room in the Henderson Center. This is my old bastion; I can't remember how many women have fallen for this gentle, wealthy haven. Jingzhu is one of them, still fighting to this day.
We had to have a little "Little Red Sings, I Play the Flute" routine, so I brewed some coffee, mainly to boost my spirits and prevent me from falling asleep during the session. I chatted with Meng about everything under the sun. She's a typical housewife, only interested in cooking and children's education; she knows nothing else. What can I force her to do? I didn't come here with any noble purpose. I told a few jokes that made Meng laugh so hard she was shaking. Looking at the time, it was almost eleven o'clock; time to get down to business.
"Xiao Meng, let's move on to the next program. If you don't want to, you can go back. I don't want to force women." Jingzhu isn't a woman, so she didn't care about such things.
"What next program? I don't understand, late-night snack?" She's quite the charmer. Xiao Meng giggled, bending over, tilting her head back, her long, narrow eyes filled with ambiguity, staring directly into my eyes, as if saying: What are you waiting for? Is this the time to play the gentleman? " You just want to sleep with me, don't you?"
Without thinking, I carried Xiao Meng to the bedside, first letting her sit on my lap and kissing her a few times. Unexpectedly, Xiao Meng was even more eager than me, quickly stripping herself naked and looking at me, saying, "What are you waiting for? Do you want me to undress you?" She was already clinging to me. Since she'd taken the initiative, why be polite? We quickly became one, our hearts filled with joy and desire, like a fleeting dream, searching for our other shore amidst the turbulent waves, chasing our own little boat in the stormy sky. After the storm, Xiao Meng still clung tightly to me, curling one of her jade-like legs and rubbing it against my waist, burying her head deeply in my chest. "Yang, I've heard a bit about your romantic escapades, but I never thought it would happen to me today. Why did you choose me? There are so many younger and prettier women than me." Xiao Meng's hands weren't idle either, she was in the prime of her life, a rogue in her prime.
"I just like you, I don't know why, I just find you pleasing to the eye."
"You've got a sweet tongue. Doesn't your wife care about you? I even acted with Sister Ruan once, it's been years, and we haven't seen each other much. Two years ago, I heard she remarried, to an official much younger than her. I never imagined it would be you. Sister Ruan has finally found happiness. Sigh, I'll really feel a little embarrassed if I see her again. But you really know how to create romance."
"Take away the 'romance,' now it's just 'romantic.'"
"You're going to kill me, you're not going to kill me." Xiao Meng tightened her grip.
If her love for Jingzhu was familial, then her love for Xinyi was spiritual, and her love for Xiao Meng, Jinglan, and others was primal. And with Sijin? It could only be an unsuccessful familial love.
"Will you fall in love with me? Director Yang. Isn't it silly to ask that?" Xiao Meng asked foolishly.
"Maybe, you know, there's no love in this world, but love grows over time. Maybe I'll fall in love with you after we do it a few more times."
"You rascal, are you always chasing after other women because your relationship with Sister Ruan isn't going well?"
"Sigh, it's too painful to recall. What's good or bad? What is love in this world? It turns out it's one thing subduing another. Your Sister Ruan is sent by heaven to subdue me."
"You're so silly. Sister Ruan probably likes your rascal's banter too. My boyfriend wouldn't tease me like that, he's like a block of wood." Xiao Meng said quietly.
"A moment of passion is worth a thousand pieces of gold. I wonder who you'll find tomorrow? Spend another one with me." Xiao Meng suddenly pounced on me, wanting a second round. Under her intense stimulation, we actually succeeded, but my lower back ached; it still hurt a little when I woke up this morning. Actually, sometimes you don't know who's playing whom. Who can really judge matters between men and women? Who cares? Ecstasy is the only thing that matters.
"Xiao Meng, I feel like Dustin Hoffman in *The Graduate*. I really regret sending you. I've given you all my last bit of ammunition. How am I going to explain this to Jingzhu?" It's like killing a thousand enemies while losing eight hundred of your own. Older women are good, but they age you faster.
I remember the first time I went to Huabin, the senior manager recommended a female student from Beijing Foreign Studies University. Back in college, there was a saying, "A good man doesn't marry a girl from Beijing Foreign Studies University." Even if we didn't marry her, nothing was more fun than a girl from Beijing Foreign Studies University. I went there quite often back then. If someone looked listless, everyone would ask, "Just got back from Beijing Foreign Studies University?" If someone rushed out without their girlfriend, everyone would ask, "Going to Beijing Foreign Studies University?"
That girl was quite pretty, a Spanish major, but compared to Jingzhu, she paled in comparison. Back then, I liked voluptuous older women the most. The senior manager was around thirty-five, with a curvaceous figure, a dignified and beautiful face, and her cheongsam slit up to her waist, revealing her long, slender legs. So I said to the head waiter, "You found this kind of girl for me, should I pay her, or should she pay me, or should you do it yourself? I like it chewy."
"Then let 'Xiaobing' (a student girl) be the substitute, I can share some with her if I can't finish it." The head waiter's words were shocking, it seemed I'd met my match tonight. "
Let's start with a 'flamenco' dance, aren't you studying Spanish? I'll pay for it." The student girl showed off a bit, not very professionally. "
Wow, Director Yang has really high taste, the warm-up's over, the real competition has begun, this is going to be a grueling schedule." The head waiter was already eager to try.
I didn't expect the head waiter to be so fierce, for an hour or so I didn't have to make a move, she was like a female version of Rambo, I even felt a bit like a gigolo.
"Mr. Wang, today's meal is free for Director Yang, and it'll be free from now on, as long as I'm with him." The head waiter said to Mr. Wang afterwards. "
You ungrateful old madam, I'll order you again tomorrow, I don't believe I can't conquer her." I said fiercely.
The next day, after conserving my energy, I brought a box of Viagra before finally managing to subdue Daban. I practically tortured her, but she wouldn't cry. I got impatient and slapped her twice across the face before she finally cried. She cried her heart out, getting tears all over her face and body. Later, I heard she didn't get out of bed for a whole day and never dared to misbehave in front of me again. Thinking about it, I realized I had gone a bit too far. I comforted Daban with kind words and bought her a set of high-end cosmetics and an LV bag before I felt a little more at ease.

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