I'm doing fine in Beijing.

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23

After graduating from university, I left the city where I had lived for almost four years. Those youthful memories,

the crazy recollections of my senior year, I've placed them all in yesterday.

I'm currently recalling and recording those stories in another novel—with Lao Bo, with Wenwen, with Fangzhang, with Ma Zai, with Xue, with the school beauty, with colleagues, and even many other things that happened that year. Of course, those stories will have a final conclusion when I finish my other novel.

I'm writing this now because I met someone a couple of days ago.

Someone I've cherished in my heart for so many years, not Wenwen, although I've never forgotten her either.

She was my boss many years ago, about five or six years ago. At that time, I had just graduated, and after more than a year of chaotic life, I finally made the decision to leave the city that held my youth, my brothers, deep memories, and pain.

Later, I went to Beijing, the city called the Imperial Capital. As for why I went there, it wasn't because I had any lofty ideals, but simply because my first half of life was in the South; my life, my memories, are all in the South.

Even my first love, unrequited love, romance, and madness all happened in the South. I wanted to completely escape those memories. I didn't want to be someone who could only act but not love anymore, so I left everything behind and came to the big city center in the North.

When I first arrived, Sister Wei helped me a lot. Sister Wei was my supervisor at my first internship company. We had some history, but I won't go into details here. Later, she left that man and went to Shenzhen to make a living on her own.

I heard she's doing very well. Of course, when she learned I was leaving that city for Beijing, she asked her friend in Beijing to pick me up and help me find a job. Luckily, I'm quite capable. Although my major wasn't great, I had some skills that could support me, like writing.

Sister Wei's friend is a very handsome man named Xue Chenxing. He's probably around 27 or 28, not much older than me, and very tall, about 1.88 meters. He's very handsome and single.

Sometimes I wonder, since Sister Wei could get him involved, their relationship must be pretty good. Why did Sister Wei choose to be that man's mistress instead of developing a relationship with this handsome guy?

Of course, I was grateful to the handsome man who gave me, a nobody, a place to stay, and treated him to meals many times after I started working.

But the story I'm telling isn't about him; this typical rich and handsome guy is now a very good friend of mine. I'm talking about what happened after I started working.

After arriving in Beijing, because I didn't graduate from a prestigious university, finding an ideal job in this city was quite difficult.

Xue, this rich and handsome guy, was a partner in a law firm at the time, and his career was thriving. I heard he earned tens of millions a year. I still don't know how I met this rich and handsome guy, but he was a really good friend. He asked around and introduced me to a company that was somewhat suitable for me.

It was an advertising company, the kind you often see on TV where a group of arrogant business elites strut down the city streets. It was quite well-known in China.

I remember my first interview was on a sunny morning. The beautiful weather put me in a slightly better mood, because of some things that had happened before, I had been feeling down and didn't want to talk.

So that day, I went to the interview in a slightly more normal state. For the interview, I wore the suit Xue had given me, a high-end custom-made suit worth over 100,000 yuan, very expensive.

Looking at the suit reminded me of a wealthy girl who had once given me a chance, but I didn't even consider it before turning it down. I had promised to pay her back for the suit, but I never had the chance, and I still haven't. Anyway

, having a nice outfit definitely made my previously listless demeanor much more energetic. Xue was quite surprised that day; he only had a few suits in that price range himself, so he recognized it immediately, making him think for a while that I was some rich kid who had run away from home after a fight with my family.

Since my image and demeanor had improved a lot, I was more confident during the interview. I won't say where the company was, but it was somewhere around the Third Ring Road. When I arrived at the interview location, I waited in the reception room for a while. There were seven or eight other interviewees that day, all young and lively. Three of them seemed to be there for internships, and the rest were there for full-time positions.

Another girl quickly chatted with all the interviewees. From their conversation, I gathered that they were all majoring in advertising or media, and most of them had studied in Beijing. There was also a guy who had worked in engineering for two years; he wasn't actually that old, but he looked much more mature.

The girl struck up a conversation with me, but I just smiled politely. After experiencing so much, my mindset has changed a lot; I myself feel a bit more reserved than before.

They didn't talk to me much either, probably because although I looked young, my formal attire didn't quite match their youthful and lively atmosphere.

Much later, this girl told me that that morning, the sun was shining brightly. She went to the company for the interview with a classmate. There were eight people there; the one with work experience, named Yu Hai, was the first to be interviewed. The six young people quickly struck up a conversation.

I looked young too, not tall or handsome, but wearing a formal suit, silently gazing out the window, I seemed more mature than them. Although she took the opportunity to ask me a few questions, I never gave a proper answer.

She said she felt like I had a story to tell.

Haha, later, after we got to know each other better, I told her that actually, I'm someone with a lot of troubles on my mind.

The interview went quickly that day, about two hours. The girl came back cheerfully, chattering with her classmates, as if the interview went very well and there shouldn't be any problems. The remaining people were a mix of joy and sorrow, and I was the last one.

First, the HR person and I had a brief introduction, a preliminary interview. Perhaps because I was dressed formally, the HR lady had a good impression of me, but she felt I was a bit quiet, and gradually, I didn't seem to fit well with the passionate and creative industry of an advertising company.

Yes, she was right; I was indeed in a very bad state at that time. Being able to conduct the interview normally was already a feat; I couldn't possibly chat happily.

Later, the HR lady asked me to wait a while while she discussed the interview with the director. After

waiting for about ten minutes, a pretty receptionist led me to a glass partition, a small conference room. A moment later, a series of clicking sounds began.

That was the sound of high heels scraping against the floor. I sat with my back to the door, trying to make a good impression, so I sat upright, eyes downcast, seemingly lost in thought.

In that instant, a flood of people and events rushed through my mind until finally calming down, and the figure across the table sat down.

"Your name is Zhao Feng?"

A clear voice brought me back to reality. I looked up; directly in front of me, across the table, sat a slender woman with long, straight black hair, wearing a shirt and short skirt—simple and elegant, with a captivating smile and particularly bright, penetrating eyes. She also had a subtle, intellectual air about her.

"Yes…"

What followed was a gentle interview, but most of the time she did the talking, and I listened. I only gave brief answers to necessary questions, making it feel like I was interviewing her.

During our conversation, I learned she was the company's vice president, in charge of other public relations or media matters, but not actually in charge of the operational aspects. Theoretically, it should have been the copywriting director interviewing me, since I was applying for a copywriting position.

She was short-staffed lately, and since she happened to be at the company today, she thought she'd drop by… It was that casual. Because she arrived late, she caught me, the last person to be interviewed. She asked if I'd be willing to try working in media, since my resume mentioned my previous sales experience, and the advertising director seemed to have reviewed my resume and, after speaking with HR, felt I lacked passion.

In other words, I wasn't suited for copywriting, so this lady just happened to come and chat with me.

Hmm, very hasty, I chuckled to myself. This outcome was expected. Looking at the window behind her, sunlight streamed in obliquely, warm and carrying the scent of spring, spreading warmth freely in the air.

Just like before…

“Zhao Feng… Zhao Feng?”

A clear voice interrupted my chaotic thoughts again. I looked away, my gaze focusing with difficulty, at the unbelievably beautiful woman before me. She was unlike anyone I'd ever met before, perhaps because the people I knew before were all relatively young.

I'd never met someone as beautiful and mature as her before. I stared at her intently for about three minutes. After she noticed me staring, she didn't say anything, just looked at me with a smile. We just stared at each other like that. Her beautiful eyes were full of vitality,

like those of an eighteen-year-old girl.

And me, my gaze seemed to pierce through her eyes, relentlessly traveling back to a long time ago, when I was still in high school, when youth was still unrestrained, when I could still love.

I saw Wenwen in her eyes again, those tearful eyes that were tightly clenched, her teeth tightly sealed, not uttering a word. Then there was Xue, a sunny and energetic girl, looking at me so coldly, and so many more…

“I love you…”

The silence was suddenly broken by my words. These words made her eyes widen in surprise. After blurting them out, I realized what I had said.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to you.”

I immediately stood up and apologized, waving my hand to explain. For a moment, I had indeed confused her with another figure. Saying such things to a stranger was really strange and awkward.

She patted her chest, smiled cutely and playfully, and said, "I didn't expect I to be so charming. You fell in love

with me after just one meeting... hahaha." That was our first meeting. It wasn't exactly pleasant; I was just an interviewee, and she was the interviewer. She didn't talk to me much after that, and I didn't keep staring at her. I kept my head down, my mind a jumble of thoughts.

In my mind, I'd already given this interview a negative score, so I didn't have much hope.

And then, really, there was no hope. The HR lady very dutifully informed me in the afternoon that I'd been rejected. This was quite normal; someone who wasn't in my field and didn't have any particularly outstanding work, it was only natural that such a big company wouldn't consider me.

Later, Brother Xue introduced me to other companies, all of which wouldn't hire me based on my qualifications, but because of a friend's introduction, they were willing to give me a chance to interview.

I submitted many resumes and went to numerous interviews, but ultimately failed. About two weeks later, Yu Hai, whom I had met once before, sent me a WeChat message saying that his former company was short of copywriters and invited me to apply.

Yu Hai was only two years older than me. After meeting him during my last interview at that company, he probably thought I looked promising, so we exchanged WeChat contacts, though we didn't communicate much otherwise.

This time, I finally didn't have to bother Brother Xue, so I eagerly went for the interview. The interviewer was Yu Hai's former director, a woman in her thirties named Li Lingling. People in the company called her Sister Ling, and she looked to be in her early twenties, exuding an ethereal beauty. This made me wonder if all the leaders of advertising companies in Beijing are stunningly beautiful?

During the interview, she asked about my views on writing and people, but we talked mostly about Yu Hai. To be honest, I didn't know him very well; we only occasionally contacted each other on WeChat. I told her about the large company he worked for now and that he seemed to be in an AME (American Management) position.

Then I passed the interview and stayed on as a trial in her team to try out copywriting work.

Chapter 2: The Beginning of a New Life

. Working at an advertising agency is exhausting. The first month was all overtime, no weekends, no rest. Because it was the beginning of the year, there were many pitches and bidding tasks.

This advertising team had lost one of their clients last year, so they were competing to fill some this year. Of course, this company wasn't big, unlike the company I interviewed with initially. It was a small advertising agency, mainly doing ads for small brands or cars, real estate, etc.

Because I was still depressed about my past, I quite enjoyed this state of working day and night. Of course, my copywriting wasn't very good; I was just slowly getting the hang of it.

Fortunately, Sister Ling took good care of me and often taught me a lot. Gradually, I started to get the hang of it. At first, she was worried that I wouldn't be used to it, since I had just graduated.

But after half a month, the whole company had a strange impression of me, as if I was a weirdo who only knew how to work and had no hobbies.

Because I worked overtime until the very last minute every day, even after everyone else had left, I was used to sleeping for a while at the company, getting my toiletries ready, and continuing to work the next day.

You see, advertising companies usually operate on a point-to-point system, meaning flexible working hours. If you work until 2 or 3 AM, you won't be at the company until at least noon the next day.

But I basically went to work every day, day or night. In those two weeks, I only went home to sleep about five or six times. Sister Ling even thought I had something wrong with my head. She talked to me twice. After I sincerely expressed my desire to take advantage of my youth to acquire more skills, because my major wasn't relevant and my professional abilities were weak, I felt I should work twice as hard. She ended up thinking I was a hardworking and ambitious newcomer to Beijing, even more dedicated than those who had previously worked in Beijing.

Anyway, the impression I left on everyone was that of a hardworking, ambitious copywriter who loved working overtime, but was usually quiet, often staring out the window, and liking to stare at a large maple leaf picture on my desk – a truly unique copywriter.

After the second month, I gradually got the hang of the work and moved out of Xue Ge's house. He was often away from home, and although he told me not to rush, I didn't want to trouble him too much. I was very grateful to him and Sister Wei, although I didn't know if I would ever have the chance to see Sister Wei again.

A few months passed, and I became one of the more capable copywriters in our team. Because I liked to write and read in my spare time, I progressed faster. Several times, even after my colleagues had left work, I stayed at the office reading because I didn't want to go home so early—I lived in a rented room outside the Fifth Ring Road.

Every night, I rushed to catch the last subway home, sometimes missing it and spending the night at the office. As time went on, I became more familiar with my colleagues, and I would occasionally tell jokes, but often, when everyone was laughing heartily, I would suddenly sigh.

At this point, everyone gets a little awkward, mainly because of me. So I try to do less to try and lighten the mood and more to just chime in. This makes it easier for both the guys and girls to accept me, because guys don't like teammates who steal the spotlight, and the girls probably think I'm gentle and harmless.

Some people even secretly gossip about whether I'm gay, but of course I'm not; I'm perfectly straight. Of course, I don't really have any opportunity to prove it to my female colleagues at work.

Sex is a man's greatest original sin. For almost half a year, I restrained myself, gradually becoming almost asexual. Until six months after I came to Beijing, our company's three teams collaborated to secure an important client. The general manager was very happy and invited our team members to party, saying that the boss would appear that night.

I had been with this company for six months, and I always thought that shrewd middle-aged man was the boss. I didn't expect him to be just a professional manager. Was there someone else who was the boss?

That day, we all went out for a big meal. The boss didn't come during dinner; apparently, he had something to do and would come later.

Then, that night, the boss booked a large private room for us at a nightclub so we could party together. That was the most relaxing day I'd had in the six months since I joined the company. After all, we had worked hard and worked overtime to secure the client, and the feeling of success was quite satisfying.

We drank baijiu (Chinese liquor) at dinner, and at the nightclub, we ordered beer, red wine, and spirits. Several lively guys and girls were wearing the trendiest clothes. I actually envied them; some were even older than me, but their energetic appearance was really great.

Unlike me, I sat alone in the corner of the sofa. From around 8 PM until the nightclub started, I only toasted a few people in my group at the beginning, including Sister Ling. After that, I just sat quietly by myself. My colleagues all know I don't like crowds.

Besides, they were all playing games, and I didn't participate, so no one paid any attention to me. Only occasionally would a colleague come to toast me, and I would raise my glass and drink with them.

The brightly lit nightclub was truly a paradise for young men and women. I watched them sing, play games, and men and women whispering flirtatious words, even though some of them already had boyfriends and some had girlfriends. Like the leader of our group, a bespectacled man in his thirties, who was very polite and I heard he was already married. Now he was sitting on either side of Sister Ling with the boss.

Sister Ling was dressed very casually, a little different from her usual ethereal style. She wore a round-neck crop top and hot pants, which accentuated her full breasts. Her long legs were still eye-catching even in the dim light.

Two men were whispering in Ling's ear, occasionally making her laugh. They kept drinking, and during their toasts, their movements were sometimes a little too forceful, resulting in occasional physical contact—all within what seemed like normal limits, given the presence of so many people.

Ling didn't seem to mind the physical contact; for a moment, she even glanced at me and, noticing my staring, raised her glass in a gesture of respect.

I forced a smile, picked up my glass of red wine, and downed it in one gulp. The warm, smooth alcohol flowing down my throat and into my stomach felt wonderful. I'd never thought of drinking before, but sometimes it really does help to drown my sorrows.

Ling raised an eyebrow, seemingly surprised. I smiled to indicate it was nothing. They continued their revelry, and I remained seated in the corner, watching the crowd's merriment, occasionally sipping my drink and savoring this pleasurable beverage.

Everyone was having a great time. A few girls who didn't drink sat next to me, chatting and eating, but I didn't join them. We didn't have much in common, except for one short-haired girl who would occasionally approach me to talk.

She was from another group, mainly working on the real estate sector, I think. I wasn't very familiar with her, but we often met at the company. She was a very cheerful and always smiling girl, with a rather fiery personality.

She seemed to be in a relationship, so it wasn't because she was interested in me. At that time, I was at my thinnest ever, weighing 110 pounds, with a gaunt face and a quiet nature. If it weren't for my relatively gentle gaze and frequent absent-mindedness, I probably would have been mistaken for a creep.

She seemed to like the leader of our group, and kept asking me what his relationship was with our Sister Ling.

To such gossip, I could only chuckle and give vague replies, since I didn't know their relationship and didn't really care.

The climax came later: the lights in the private room suddenly came on, and everyone who had been so close immediately separated, all smiling as they looked at the woman entering.

A woman, radiant even under the lights, walked in gracefully, dressed elegantly, smiling and nodding to everyone.

"Everyone, welcome Sister Hong, our big boss..."

Our general manager stood up first. Some people recognized her, but a few of us who arrived later hadn't seen her before. This was our company's boss, Ming Yuehong, a very nice and poetic name.

Several directors and some veteran employees greeted her warmly, and she very politely raised her glass with everyone, saying it was to congratulate everyone on securing the new project, and that everyone could drink as much as they wanted that night, and that she'd take everyone out to dance later.

Everyone's spirits rose even higher. She sat in the middle of a long row of sofas, with Sister Ling sitting next to the general manager, about a body length away from her.

Then the music started, and everyone took turns toasting. Of course, the boss was very polite, offering a polite toast to everyone, and everyone went along with it, no one daring to force her to drink.

Well, I continued to shrink into the corner, because I had already been blocked from view earlier, and with the lights off, no one noticed me anymore, so I could still continue to feed myself a little drink, one glass after another.

It was that state of mind where my brain was blank, staring blankly at the ceiling, unconsciously feeding myself with a glass of wine. The short-haired girl next to me looked at me with a bit of surprise after toasting me, but of course she didn't pay much attention. There are plenty of people who pretend to be profound these days, and I was probably one of them.

I was thinking that if I got drunk soon I would go home, and then the next second I heard Sister Ling calling my name.

"Zhao Feng, Zhao Feng, come over and introduce yourself to Sister Hong."

Some people's eyes turned to me, and then a few girls around me noticed Sister Ling and the others' gazes and turned to me as well. I pouted, got up, and walked over with my wine glass.

Actually, I was a little embarrassed and didn't really want to go over, because Ming Yuehong was the woman who interviewed me at the first company I went to when I first came to Beijing.

"Oh...it's you?"

She smiled generously, with the air of an older sister. She looked younger than Sister Ling, but she had a strong presence.

Sister Ling looked at her and me with a bit of surprise, and the people around us also had surprised expressions. But I had only met her once, so I awkwardly smiled and raised my glass to toast the boss.

"Is this the 'little talent' you told me about? Look how thin he is, don't overwork him." Ming Yuehong turned to Sister Ling and said. Maybe I was really not in good shape, because I was so thin that I looked a little gaunt.

"No, Sister Ling is very good to me. I, I'm just naturally thin." I swirled my glass. "Hello, Sister Hong, I'll work hard from now on." After saying that, I drank the glass of wine in one gulp. Ming Yuehong's smile was quite beautiful, her crescent-shaped eyes full of soft light, which was pleasing to the eye. Maybe this is the difference between the upper class and ordinary people like us.

When she smiled, the whole private room seemed to glow. People singing, talking, and toasting stopped, even the girls looked at her. It felt like you were facing the center of the world.

There's an idiom that best describes that state.

Her eyes sparkled…

Then I sighed, lowered my head, and returned to my corner. Everyone immediately plunged into another round of wild partying, but Sister Ling glanced at me a few times, seemingly unintentionally. I raised my glass, and Sister Ling made a downward gesture with her hand, indicating that I should drink less.

I drank a bit too much that day, though not completely drunk. Later, led by the general manager, they went to the outdoor area to party. Several female colleagues were picked up by their boyfriends and left, while others with boyfriends or girlfriends didn't go back, forming two or three small groups and leaving as well.

Of course, what they do is none of our business. These days, prostitutes are heartless, actors are unfaithful, who cares about true love anymore?

Chapter 3: The beginning

was just a simple team dinner and a wild night out at a club, nothing special. I was pretty drunk, and I didn't want to go home drunk like a fool, so I restrained myself a bit before I got too tipsy.

Everyone left one after another. Ming Yuehong went outside to pay the bill and chat with a few directors. Only a few young, clueless male and female colleagues were left inside singing.

Before I left, my WeChat vibrated.

You see, since I came to Beijing, I've basically been working, and the people I added on WeChat were all colleagues. Today I didn't work overtime, so of course no colleague would vibrate me. I opened WeChat.

Then I froze. A chill from the bottom of my bones slowly crept up from my feet and gradually solidified in my chest. It felt like a huge hole had been ripped out of my chest, it hurt so much that I could barely speak.

I picked up the bottle with trembling hands, slowly brought it to my lips, and gulped it down, the hot liquor dispelling the slight chill in my body.

"What's wrong?"

The short-haired girl appeared before me. She was packing her things to leave, and seemed startled by my actions, quietly asking beside me.

"Nothing... I just wanted to drink."

I didn't look at her, gave a wry smile, and glanced at my phone. A few simple black characters were clearly displayed on WeChat.

The short-haired girl was closer to me; she turned her head to look, then stared at me with her mouth agape in surprise.

The WeChat message simply read: I'm getting married...

I could only smile even more bitterly. I finished the rest of the liquor in one gulp, then slung my bag over my shoulder and prepared to leave. The girl, looking flustered, dashed out the door.

I took a deep breath, suppressing my chaotic thoughts, and just as I started to walk, Sister Ling quickly walked in. Her eyes held a hint of worry. Seeing the short-haired girl behind her, I knew what was going on. I waved my hand and said, "I'm fine, I'll just go home and get some sleep."

Sister Ling disagreed. She grabbed my arm directly, "No, you can't just leave like that." Actually, I wasn't really hurt. I'd already let go of some things, but the sudden message was just a little painful.

In the end, only the short-haired girl and Sister Ling were left to chat with me. I didn't hear what they were saying. After drinking about a bottle of wine, at three in the morning, my phone rang.

It rang for a long time, but I didn't answer. They didn't say anything, just watched quietly. When it rang for the third time, Sister Ling patted me, "Kid, what's wrong? Want to go out?" I sighed, took out my phone, and sure enough, it was that familiar number. I'd long since forgotten the name, but I remembered the number clearly. I put it on the table, really not wanting to answer.

Sister Ling glared at me, pressed the answer button, and put the call on speakerphone—it was me who turned it on.

"Hello..."

"Did you receive the WeChat message?"

A gentle female voice came from the other end. "You'll come, right?"

This was the first time I'd heard her voice in six months. I took a deep breath, trying my best to control my thoughts. "No, I'm quite busy in Beijing."

"We've already talked it out. Turns out we're such good friends. The past is the past. I don't love you, and you don't love me. It was all just a momentary impulse. As long as we have a clear conscience, that's enough. Your good brother is getting married, and you're not coming back?" For some reason, my mind started to race. I didn't look at the other two people's expressions, and lowered my head, saying softly, "What if I... have a guilty conscience?"

"You..."

The person on the other end couldn't say anything more. I reached out and hung up.

"It's okay, really. I'm so sleepy. Let me go home and sleep." I got up, grabbed my bag, and left.

That phone call was my final farewell to the past. After that, I changed my phone number, changed my WeChat, and re-added all my friends. Many of my old friends disappeared along with the phone number.

After that, no one at the company discussed whether I was gay anymore. Because of that phone call that night, I became a heartbroken man, the key being that phrase, "I feel guilty..." Perhaps because of this, the women at the company were all very kind to me, especially Sister Ling. She often introduced me to different women. Yes, I became the one she always took to meetings.

Even when AE and AM weren't there, she wasn't worried at all; she just dragged me along.

Of course, any hurt fades with time, and I became more cheerful. But as a girl, I still have no plans to date for the time being. Sometimes I'd rather masturbate a few more times.

Things started to change as I gradually took on more work and spent more time with Sister Ling. I began to occasionally overhear colleagues whispering, like, "Another one," or "This one's so boring, let's see how long he can last," and so on.

At first, I pretended not to hear, but as time went on, I noticed that even people from other groups were acting strangely, like the boss and the director of our group.

I wasn't entirely sure what was going on, but I felt it all stemmed from Sister Ling.

She's about thirty-four this year, a full twelve years older than me, but her looks are still stunning. She looks younger than the twenty-three or twenty-four-year-old girls in our group, and she has an ethereal quality. She's the kind of person you see from afar and feel unapproachable, but after that, all sorts of thoughts constantly arise in your mind.

Many people in the company and clients pursue her, and she says that quite a few PhDs, Masters, and overseas returnees also pursue her, but she hasn't accepted any of them.

Later, while chatting with the short-haired girl, I learned that Sister Ling had been with the company for several years but had never been in a serious relationship. However, everyone in the company knew that she had almost every male companion, some from clients and some from within the company. Without exception, they were all young, newly hired engineers who often followed Sister Ling. It's said that Sister Ling had more than two male companions within the company, the last one being named Yu Hai.

I suddenly understood. No wonder Yu Hai told me to focus on copywriting and not to think about front-end development…

But this was only half true. At Ling's age, she's like a wolf in sheep's clothing, ready to pounce. But with her looks, what kind of man couldn't she find? It didn't make sense for

her to date the younger guys in the company, unless she had some special fetish. I remained silent, gradually taking on more front-end work each day. I started learning to work on projects independently, analyzing product value, creating customer profiles, understanding customer needs, and analyzing user pain points.

Gradually, I found that I had grasped the basic principles of advertising. I wasn't an expert, but I wasn't completely clueless anymore.

This continued until autumn. The weather in Beijing gradually cooled down, and I slowly adapted to the city and its fast-paced lifestyle. I started reducing my work on weekends, going out for walks, visiting bookstores, or playing basketball. My energy and spirits improved, and my weight gradually returned to around 120 pounds. I was still thin, but much better than before, when I was skin and bones.

The company trusted me a lot, and in my first year, they made me a senior copywriter, letting me lead some small strategy meetings. I originally thought I could just be an ordinary person who works hard, and continue on like this, forgetting the past and the unpleasant things.

My relationship with Sister Ling also gradually became much closer. Occasionally, when I went out with her, I would see her hugging and kissing some men very intimately. I once asked her if they were her boyfriends.

She shook her head and smiled, saying no, so I didn't ask any further. Just like I had a story, how many people in this society are truly pure and innocent? Everyone has secrets, they just don't want to talk about them.

Later, Sister Ling became more and more open with me. Sometimes she would drive me home after working overtime at night, making phone calls on the way, saying things like, "I'll come to your place tonight," or "I've booked a room and I'm waiting for

you." If I were just a naive recent graduate, I might have felt embarrassed, but now I would just silently look out the car window. I had no right to interfere in Sister Ling's affairs; everyone has a different way of life.

But about nine months after I started working, in the late autumn, her interactions with me began to change. To be precise, she started to go a little too far.

For example, she would unconsciously touch my head when talking at work, or stand very close to me when talking, like resting her chin on my shoulder. Of course, most of this happened in her office, when we were alone. In front of our colleagues, she remained very proper.

Sometimes I wonder, how could such an ethereal girl do something like that?

But I try my best to avoid it. If she touches my head, I'll politely tell her that men shouldn't have their heads touched; only young boys can have their heads touched, and it's inappropriate for someone my age.

Or when she leans on my shoulder to talk, I'll turn my head away, trying to avoid getting too close. I think this makes my attitude very clear.

The worst thing was one time after work, around midnight, she was driving me home. Before we even reached my apartment, she parked on a deserted side of a highway, with hardly any houses nearby, only the occasional car speeding by.

She changed clothes in front of me. She was originally wearing a well-fitting business suit, looking professional and capable. She took it all off in front of me, starting to unbutton her shirt, then her skirt, until she was only wearing underwear. Then she changed into a pure white dress in the car, put on makeup, and suddenly her whole demeanor became pure and ladylike.

All of this happened about thirty centimeters away from me. The car was filled with a peach-pink scent, a sweet perfume permeating the air.

I turned my head the moment she reached to unbutton the first button of her collar. This familiar scene made me a little dazed, but I resisted turning around. Only her beautiful body was reflected in the blurry glass. As a normal man, I was ashamed to have an erection. I could only use my bag to cover my crotch, hoping she hadn't seen it.

But I think she probably did, because my erection bulged out a large section of my pants, a high bulge. My bag didn't cover it very well, and she probably still noticed. Besides, the way she looked at me was completely strange. That up-and-down gaze, the occasional glance that drifted over my genitals, made me feel like I was sitting on pins and needles.

This incident made me very anxious. I started considering whether I should quit my job. Some people might think this kind of romantic encounter is great, but for me, it was a bit embarrassing.

After changing clothes, neither of us mentioned what had just happened. She drove me home as if nothing had occurred, even wishing me goodnight. I told her to be careful. But when I got out of the car, she called out "Hello," and I waited three seconds without turning around. Finally, she said softly, "Never mind."

Chapter 4: The Trouble Caused by the Blackout .

That night, I sent her a very serious WeChat message, mainly hoping that my supervisor could maintain a rational distance from subordinates at work, and that I would never ride in her car again.

From then on, Sister Ling seemed to return to normal. She no longer got very close to me, nor did she make any overly intimate gestures. However, her temper seemed to have worsened considerably, and she became more strict about work.

Due to my lack of experience, I was criticized by her for about two weeks straight. My colleagues in the group were terrified, because Sister Ling rarely got angry with colleagues, but she targeted me for two weeks straight. Finally, I submitted my resignation, though I was still extremely grateful to her.

Because of her, I truly mastered the basics of advertising.

Sister Ling didn't agree to my request, nor did she try to persuade me to stay. I accepted it was company policy to leave after a month. For the last month, I worked like crazy, writing reports non-stop. Sister Ling didn't give me any more trouble, which I thought was a parting gesture of goodwill. But what happened next shattered my worldview.

It was almost the end of October, about three or four days before my resignation was due. I had finally independently completed a fairly important phase of a communication plan. Thinking about leaving this place where I had worked for almost a year, I invited my colleagues and a few close friends—the administrative receptionist and our short-haired colleague—for a meal.

The meal was normal, but then a colleague suggested karaoke, splitting the bill. This is common in companies like ours; when we're not busy, we split the bill and have fun. Most of us were single; those with partners had their own places to go. We

didn't stay out too late. I treated everyone to drinks, and we complained about the company and clients. Finally, everyone wished me a quick resignation. Haha.

Finally, the short-haired girl even confessed her feelings to me, but I rejected her, using the excuse that everyone was drunk. Then Sister Ling arrived; I don't know which colleague told her, but out of politeness and to express my genuine gratitude, I had a few drinks with her.

After that, I blacked out. It was probably the most relaxed drinking session I'd had in a long time, so I drank too much.

I woke up the next day around noon in a hotel room. I was dizzy and lightheaded for about ten minutes before I came to my senses, and then my worldview was shattered.

I was lying naked in bed, completely unclothed. To my right lay a hot body, sleeping on its side with its back to me. I didn't need to see the face; just the long hair and exposed shoulders told me who it was.

"Li Lingling?"

My voice was a little angry. I've always respected her, and I've even thought about trying to mend our relationship in the future, but in that situation, I simply had no idea what had happened last night.

Sister Ling stirred and turned to look at me. A beautiful, ethereal woman, bare-shouldered, was looking at me in the morning. Any man would feel a surge of desire, and my body reacted instinctively. However, my mind fiercely controlled me. For the first time, I felt an urge to hit a woman.

"You're awake?"

Sister Ling's voice was still so gentle. "You were so vigorous last night, why don't you rest a little longer today? It's the weekend, after all."

I was utterly enraged by her nonchalant attitude. I grabbed her shoulders and asked, my voice a little louder, "What did you do? What happened last night? How could we... how could this happen?" "This... shouldn't you ask yourself?"

Sister Ling frowned, slapped my hand away, and gently rubbed her shoulders. "Think back, who dragged me here last night?"

My head throbbed even more. I closed my eyes and began to recall.

But my hangover brain couldn't effectively recall everything, though fragments of memory still churned within me.

I don't remember much of what happened last night. I only remember Sister Ling taking me home again, and then, after drinking, I started feeling hot all over. My lower abdomen felt incredibly hot for some reason. The clearest memory I have is of my penis, which was rock hard and hadn't cooled down at all.

My confused mind still had a sliver of clarity left, but I don't know how I got to the hotel. It seems like someone helped me into the room, which was dimly lit. A hand touched my penis through my pants, and the unbearable pleasure made me ejaculate on the spot. I hugged a woman and kissed her wildly, forcefully taking off her clothes.

That was Sister Ling. I hadn't been with a woman for almost a year. I used a lot of force, and Sister Ling seemed to be desperately trying to break free. She pushed me and even hit me, but I quickly tore off her skirt, then her underwear.

Sister Ling looked at me with a terrified expression, begging for mercy, but I didn't listen. I grabbed her, flipped her over, and pinned her to the bed. She lay there with her upper body on the bed and her legs kneeling on the floor. Her top was still intact, but her lower body was completely naked.

The room was dark, and I couldn't remember what Sister Ling's genitals looked like, but I pulled out my enormous, long-awaited penis. My 18-centimeter-long penis hadn't been inside a woman for almost a year.

So, in my drunken state, it seemed even more ferocious. I didn't even do any foreplay with Sister Ling before thrusting in hard. It suddenly touched a soft, tender body. Lingjie and I both breathed heavily. Lingjie didn't struggle; she looked up at me, but in the dead of night, I must have looked like a devil.

The first time, I didn't penetrate. I pulled back again, pressing Lingjie's white, tender buttocks onto the bed to keep her still, while using my other hand to guide my penis forward, directly against the center of Lingjie's vulva. The large glans slowly parted her labia, and I touched a soft, recessed area. Instinctively, I thrust forward forcefully.

"Ah…"

Lingjie let out a high-pitched, powerful cry, revealing pain and resentment, but also a hint of pleasure.

I vaguely remember her lower body being warm and tight, just like her gentle voice. Lingjie's vagina wasn't the kind that was tightly clenched; after penetration, a gentle spasm continued, constantly contracting from front to back, constantly stimulating my penis and glans.

I kept pressing down on her neck to prevent her from getting up, while my other hand pressed down on her buttocks. My penis was fully inside her vagina. Her tender cunt was still quite dry, with not much vaginal fluid seeping out, but I couldn't hold back any longer. My hips began to move wildly.

It seemed as if the room was filled with the sounds of flesh colliding. At first, Sister Ling kept her head down and didn't make a sound, only gripping the sheets tightly with both hands. But later, she started to moan in a low voice.

"Ah... slower, it hurts... ah... Zhao Feng..."

"Slap slap slap..."

My lower abdomen and her buttocks collided strongly and rapidly, the clapping of flesh growing faster and faster. My erect penis felt her vagina becoming wet, making my thrusting smoother and smoother.

"Oh... ah... too deep, husband, too deep..."

Sister Ling's moans became chaotic, and she called out all sorts of names.

"Isn't this what you wanted? Sister Ling, if you want it, I'll fuck you to death, why do you have to force me..."

I gritted my teeth, fiercely grabbing her waist with both hands, suspending her buttocks in the air. She weakly supported herself with her upper body and legs, and then I fiercely thrust back and forth with my waist, the piston-like motion of my penis in her vagina becoming faster and faster, rubbing against our genitals until they became hot.

"No, no more... ah... husband... you're too cruel... you're too cruel to me..." Sister Ling shook her head violently, crying out in a chaotic manner. Her vagina contracted violently, and a hot flow gushed out from deep within her vagina, directly washing over my glans. She had an orgasm...

"Ah... ah... stop... ah... stop for a moment..." During the climax, I didn't stop the frequency of my thrusting at all, but instead thrust even harder. Sister Ling was hit by the ultimate pleasure, her whole body convulsing like a shrimp, but under my powerful thrusting, the orgasm lasted for a long time.

"Pfft...pfft...pfft..."

The thick penis thrust in and out of her vagina, and soon the milky white fluid around the vaginal opening was bubbling up from the friction. It was the vaginal fluid brought out by the penis, which had turned white due to friction.

The first round lasted about ten minutes before I ejaculated. Because I was drunk and hadn't had sex for a long time, my penis was too sensitive, so I pressed my penis hard against her vulva, hard and hard, as if I wanted to shove both of my testicles into her vagina.

Finally, spurt after spurt of milky white semen shot deep into Sister Ling's vagina, completely ignoring her cries, but pressing hard and hard, and lifting her buttocks high to prevent any semen from spilling out.

Then my memory started to show various positions: me holding her in front of the window and thrusting, her riding me and wildly twisting her buttocks, and the normal doggy style position. It seems we tried nearly ten different positions last night, but I really can't remember how many times we did it together.

"So, I slept with you?"

Although my memory told me the answer, I still found it hard to believe. I had clearly restrained myself from abstinence and vowed never to hurt other women indiscriminately again. How could I have lost all restraint after drinking?

Sister Ling didn't speak. She turned and hugged me. I tried to block her, but my hand touched a soft body. Sister Ling's breasts weren't large, at most a B cup, so my hand could easily grasp them.

"You bad boy..."

Sister Ling thought I did it on purpose, and then her warm, delicate body pressed against my chest. She looked up at me with a hint of reproach and said, "I thought you were really going to quit. Turns out you were just playing hard to get, deliberately luring me in. You finally made your move last night." "

I..."

I withdrew my hand, not wanting my body to act impulsively again. I immediately decided to explain to her, regardless of whether she could understand or not, but what happened last night was truly unintentional.

For the next half hour, I held her in my arms and carefully explained my true thoughts to her. Regarding last night's events, I gave a standard scumbag's answer: You deserve better.

Unexpectedly, Sister Ling wasn't angry at all. Instead, she listened to everything I said with a smile. Then, under the covers, a small, cool hand grasped my erect penis.

"Are you sure you don't want to?"

Her small hand skillfully began to stroke it up and down, left and right, as if playing with a toy. But it was, after all, my penis. As her small hand began to stroke it, the tip of my penis started to secrete precum. Soon, the fluid seeping from my penis soaked her small hand and my entire penis.

"Hoo... Sister Ling, don't do this."

I didn't dare to move at all. The pleasure in my penis was too intense. Last night's memory wasn't direct enough, but her small hand this morning felt too good.

"Pop..."

Sister Ling got up and kissed my cheek before crawling back under the covers.

Chapter 5 An Inescapable Morning

Sister Ling skillfully slipped between my legs, the blanket arching high, revealing a large section of her body. I was still trying my best to restrain myself.

But soon, the small hand that had been holding my penis left, and then a soft, tender flesh pressed against my hot glans. It gently opened and took the glans in, a cool little tongue inside gently licking the urethral opening, starting from the center of the glans and slowly licking every inch of the flesh in a circular motion.

Then her small mouth opened and began to slowly swallow my penis, including the glans. Sister Ling's lips pressed tightly against my penis as she slowly took it in, her tongue also constantly licking the glans and the shaft.

"Ah... Sister Ling... you..."

Now it was my turn to grab the sheets, speechless. My reason told me I should push her away, but the reality was that the pleasure on my penis was intensifying. This feeling of being forced to perform oral sex against my will was like poison, making the pleasure even stronger.

After about ten centimeters, the head of my penis pressed against her soft throat—this was the size for Ling-jie's oral sex. Then she began sucking up and down, constantly trying to swallow my glans with her throat. The intense stimulation made my penis even hotter. My hand reached behind her kneeling body and touched her tender vulva from behind.

"Sss..."

Without much movement, my middle finger directly inserted into the middle of her vagina. It was tight and warm inside. Ling-jie suddenly stopped performing oral sex. I couldn't see her expression from under the covers, but I guess she was startled by my sudden insertion.

Then she continued performing oral sex, and my hand began to move in and out of her vagina.

My penis and her nimble tongue intertwined intensely in her mouth. Her tongue was like a paintbrush, constantly touching me, and my hips began to move up and down as I thrust into her mouth.

Her long tongue stimulated the tip of my penis like licking an ice pop, her lips gliding over the glans again and again, even brushing against my scrotum, exciting me and causing my whole body to convulse.

Time, consciousness, the world—I forgot everything. I didn't know if she was happily indulging in this, but I was definitely in a state of extreme excitement.

After a few minutes, my hand got a little sore, so I stopped. At the same time, Sister Ling released my large penis, because she found that with oral sex, my penis didn't seem to show any signs of ejaculating.

She crawled out of the covers, lay on my chest, and looked at me with slightly dazed eyes, saying, "I didn't expect your thing to be so powerful. Hmph... Tell me, still don't want to do it with me?" I smiled bitterly. Even now, my penis was still as hard as iron. A mature and beautiful female boss, naked and lying on my chest, whom I had forcefully fucked all night last night—I really couldn't think of any reason to refuse her.

"Consider this a final indulgence before leaving," I told myself. Then I flipped over and pinned Sister Ling beneath me, kneeling between her legs to spread them apart. I brought my waist close to her hips. My thick, long penis thrust forcefully into her tender vulva.

"Ah... be gentle,"

Sister Ling cried out softly. My glans slid into her vaginal opening with a soft "plop." Her vaginal opening was tightly contracted like a gatekeeper, preventing any foreign object from entering its owner's body. But my penis didn't stop, slowly penetrating inch by inch.

Because the feeling from last night had faded, I was extremely patient this morning, using force little by little to allow my penis to slowly penetrate. The umbrella-shaped glans stretched open fold after fold, like passing through checkpoint after checkpoint, slowly deepening into the even tighter interior of her vagina.

"Ah... Feng, be gentle... your penis... is too big..." Sister Ling grabbed my hands, her eyes wide, her small mouth slightly open, seemingly not quite used to the size of my penis.

"Didn't we try it last night? Because bigger is better." I leaned down and kissed her lips, speaking softly.

"But last night, ah... last night you fucked me so hard, oh... my pussy is burning this morning, please be gentle."

Sister Ling said pitifully.

This mature female leader in her thirties acted like a little woman when my penis entered her vagina. I suddenly remembered how she had been unreasonable and forceful when she targeted me before, and I wanted to get revenge.

I slowly stopped my thrusting and looked at her, saying, "Sister Ling, do you regret it?" "Regret what?"

Sister Ling looked puzzled. Being fucked by me was something she had wanted before. She had always liked young bodies, so she was willing to have sex with young men she found attractive. Although she was very angry when I grabbed her to fuck her last night, after a night of fighting, she was satisfied by my big penis.

"Regret what you did to me the other day..."

After saying that, I pulled out my penis sharply, leaving only the glans inside her vagina, and then thrust it in hard with a "plop. "

Sister Ling's body arched suddenly, her mouth wide open, her eyes filled with terror, gasping for air, her face deathly pale, as if she had been completely stunned by the penetration.

I didn't move, just kept my penis firmly inserted deep into her vagina, feeling the head of my penis against my boss's vagina.

"You're crazy... ah... it hurts so much..."

Sister Ling hit me twice, "You heartless bastard, I teased you before, and you were all serious, and now this is how you treat me?"

"Plop plop plop..." I started thrusting my hips, my penis rapidly penetrating Sister Ling's vagina.

"I really didn't want to, but wasn't your attitude towards me afterward a bit too bad?" I reached out and grabbed her small white breasts, kneading them hard into different shapes.

"Slap slap slap..."

My hips slammed fiercely against Sister Ling's body, the pleasure of my penis thrusting in and out accumulating between us.

"You bad guy... I told you to fuck me but you wouldn't, ah... I told you not to fuck me but you forced yourself on me tonight, ahh... Zhao Feng, you're a fucking pervert..."

Sister Ling started thrusting her hips to meet my thrusts. "You're angry, aren't you? Then I'll let you fuck me to your heart's content, okay? Whoever gives in first today is a coward. If you're so capable, fuck me all day long." Sister Ling hooked her legs around my waist, looking at me provocatively, as if she wanted to exhaust me to death.

"Then let's go."

I thrust my ass up and started fucking her hard, from nine shallow thrusts and one deep thrust to three shallow thrusts and three deep thrusts, from full penetration to just the glans. We made love in bed all morning, mainly because I fucked her fiercely, making her orgasm three or four times.

Even because of the excessive force, the inner walls of her vagina were pulled out by my penis, and the vaginal opening was turned white from being fucked.

"Still being stubborn? Still being stubborn? I'll fuck you to death..."

After Sister Ling's fourth orgasm, I also felt the prelude to my own. I gripped her breasts tightly, tearing at them forcefully, my lower body slapping against her buttocks, making them red all over.

"Come on... ahhh... keep going if you dare... fuck me to death..." Sister Ling was covered in sweat, her hair clinging tightly to her forehead, her fair skin drenched in sweat. Her eyes rolled back, her limbs lay limply, but her mouth remained stubborn. "

Slap slap slap slap slap..."

I held my breath and thrust nearly a hundred times in one go. My lower body finally gave way, my scrotum contracted, a jolt of electricity ran down my spine, and the vas deferens of my penis trembled violently, gushing out a large amount of fluid that shot deep into Sister Ling's vagina.

"Fuck... so good..."

One spurt after another of semen shot directly into the depths of Sister Ling's body. The pleasure of having sex while conscious was indeed more intense.

"Ah..." With my ejaculation, Sister Ling climaxed again. Her legs went limp, and our genitals were pressed tightly together. I lay on top of her, sharing the afterglow of the climax.

After a while, Sister Ling spoke first: "Zhao Feng, you're really amazing." "That's right..."

My penis was already half-soft, but I didn't get up, leaving it inside Sister Ling's vagina. "You know, back in the day, I could handle three thousand women without even breaking a sweat." "Slap..."

Sister Ling reached out and slapped my shoulder: "Look at you, so capable! If you're so amazing, why did you pretend to be so high and mighty before? Were you trying

to keep me in suspense?"

"No, really, I don't want to hurt anyone else because of my body." "Hey, your body is really something. If I get used to having sex with you, it'll be hard to satisfy other men."

Sister Ling reached up and smoothed her bangs, saying, "What, aren't you getting up? Are you really going to die on my belly?

Get up, I have things to do this afternoon."

"Didn't you say we had a showdown? Whoever admits defeat today can leave." I thrust my hips a few times, my semi-erect penis sliding up and down inside Sister Ling's vagina, bringing out a mixture of semen and vaginal fluid, which flowed down from Sister Ling's buttocks and soaked a large area of the bed sheet.

"Oh..."

Sister Ling looked at me with seductive eyes: "From last night until now, do you know how many times you've done it to me? Eight times, a full eight times. Are you sure you want to do it again? Don't blame me if you really die from exhaustion." Eight times, that many? I have no recollection of last night at all. It seems I really went a bit too far last night.

"Then admit defeat first, and I'll let you go."

I pouted. To be honest, my lower back was really sore. This was the first time I'd felt this way after having sex with a woman.

"Hey... brat, come on then? Do you think I'm afraid of you? I lost my virginity at sixteen, and over the years I've slept with all sorts of men from all over the world, both domestic and foreign. The worst was a black guy, his dick was long and hard, he once made me unable to get out of bed. I've seen all kinds of dicks, all sorts of types and styles. Yours is long and hard, but you're still young. After doing it so much, your stamina isn't as good as a foreigner's." Hearing Sister Ling talk about her promiscuous history, I actually felt a thrill. I really wanted to use my penis to fuck her hard until she couldn't speak.

"Getting fucked a lot doesn't prove you're good..." I said, and started moving my body. My semi-erect penis was thrusting in and out of Sister Ling's vagina again.

"Oh..."

Sister Ling was caught off guard by my exclamation, then she stared straight at me and said, "Yeah, getting fucked a lot only proves I'm a slut, right?"

"Well... who you sleep with is your freedom, it has nothing to do with your character or morality." I sensed that Sister Ling wasn't in a good mood, so I comforted her, "Besides, your pussy is indeed horny, but whether you're slutty or not is your own lifestyle, nobody can tell you what to do, right?"

"You've got a sweet tongue, kid."

Sister Ling reached out and put her arm around my head, her lips meeting mine. We kissed passionately for a long time, our tongues entwined, until my penis was hard again.

"Alright, Sister Ling, today I'll fuck you good and show you what I'm capable of." "Come on, you brat, if you make me walk out of this door today, don't contact me again. If you can fuck me until I beg for mercy, I'll be your fuck buddy from now on. You can fuck me anytime you want, I'll travel a thousand miles to offer my pussy, okay?" "Phew... Sister Ling, you said it..."

What followed was a fierce physical struggle between a man and a woman.

Sister Ling, having slept with countless men, possessed impeccable stamina and technique, a testament to her ethereal beauty.

Under her guidance, we began trying various positions, and she had no reservations whatsoever, letting me ejaculate directly inside her every time.

[The End]

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