Me (below)

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23

「不会搞外遇？不会脚踏两条船？不会花钱找妓女？」她嘟着嘴说着。
『放心放心……当然不会……』我点点头，一个不留神，却想到了lesbi。
回到饭店已是傍晚，肚子咕咕的叫着。
『要不要先吃一点再上去？』
「也好。」
我牵着她的手，抱着一大束花，走进了一楼的餐厅，路过之处，旁人无不侧
目。
两人分坐已定，各自点了餐，我还多要了一份红酒。她言笑晏晏，显得极为
开心。雯雯长得极美，笑起来十分让人心动，几杯红酒下肚之后，脸上泛起了红
晕，更添些许娇豔。
想起以前在酒店的情景，那时高不可攀又遥不可及的女人，现在竟坐在我面
前……世界上的事情，真是难以预料。
用餐完毕之后，拿着喝剩的红酒，两个人手牵着手回到房间。也许是开车累
了，她进门之后就躺在床上休息。
平常谦都在宿舍打电动，雯雯不方便过来；她住女生宿舍，我也进不去。学
校裡的平台琴，变成两人唯一有机会，能躺在一起的地方。一个多月下来，琴盖
已被震鬆掉，琴弦也沾到一些奇怪的液体，恐怕是需要大修了。最后一次弹那台
琴的时候，琴音听来倒有点像女子的呻吟。
幻想一下，哪天某大钢琴家来演奏的情景。天呐！佩特拉卡的情诗，莫名奇
妙的变成了淫诗。
好邪恶。
我把红酒和那一大束鲜花放好，躺在她的旁边。这是认识以来，第一次有机
会，两人一起躺在床上。我心脏噗通噗通的跳着。
『你累了啊？』我看她很疲惫的样子。
「有一点……」她揉着眼睛：「开了一天车子说……」
『那我帮妳放个水，洗个澎澎好不？』
「嗯嗯。」她点点头。
我拿了条毛巾到浴室，先用热水泡了一下，拿去让她擦个脸。回到浴室，用
肥皂清洗了一下浴缸，才放水下去。
忙了半天，头上冒着汗，热得半死。走出浴室时，差点与她撞个满怀，把我
吓了一大跳。不过真正让我吓到的，不是差点撞到人，而是她已一丝不挂。
以前虽有与她裸裎相见，但都是在那阴暗的演奏厅，只能靠着微弱的月光，
一窥她的身体。这是第一次，在灯光下看到她那完美的身躯，依旧让人摒息。
「瞧你吓成这样，是不是做什么亏心事啦？」她笑着帮我擦掉头上汗珠。
『帮个忙儿，都嘛被妳吓得说。』
「唷，那我穿衣服回去好了。」她嘟着嘴说着，假装生气，模样十分可爱。
『不必不必，脱都脱了，怎能让妳轻易穿上！ I made a face at her, put my arm
around , and walked into the bathroom before turning back to the bedroom to change.
I heard the sound of running water; Wenwen had turned on the shower and was showering outside the bathtub, planning to get clean before
soaking.
As I took off my clothes, a certain unsavory thing was already standing at attention, making me incredibly embarrassed. I covered
it with both hands, head down, looking pitiful, like a thief sneaking into the bathroom.
She turned around, saw my clumsy appearance, and laughed so hard she bent over, grabbing the showerhead and spraying
water …
“Silly Sam, you’re so horny…”
“I didn’t mean to say that, it’s just being naughty!” I looked at her innocently. “
When?”
“When will you return it?” I asked her with a smile.
"I'll check it out later!" She slowly squatted down, looking at where I was standing at attention. "So cute
... How come a boy's looks like this?" She reached out and pinched it, a tingling sensation spreading through me, making me stand even straighter
.
"Boys all look like this, haven't you seen it before?"
"Uh... I really haven't..."
She looked very intently, picking up her hand to measure it. "Wow, an octave!" She stuck out her tongue.
"Uh, I don't know if an octave is long or short, I've never compared myself to anyone." After she gestured with her fingers
for a while, that place became more and more unruly, swollen and bulging.
"Shame on you..." She picked up the shower gel, applied it, and gently
rubbed ...
"Ah..." Waves of tingling sensation washed over me, an unprecedented feeling. My desire was fiercely aroused, almost
exceeding my limit of restraint.
Seeing that letting her linger any longer might lead to her laughing at me if she couldn't hold on any longer, I quickly pulled her
up . "It's not fair that you're the only one washing!" I said with a smile, picking up the shower gel and applying it to my hands, my eyes
glancing at her corresponding area.
"What do you want to do? What do you want to do? Wow~~"
I reached down, and she went limp against me. "You're so naughty..." she
patted , but I reached for her nipples, which were brimming with mysterious desire. "Oh..." Only her panting could be heard.
Wenwen was completely limp against me, unable to stand, and I helped her into the bathtub.
Her face was flushed, her eyes were watery, and her beauty was tinged with shyness. She lay in the water,
her arms , "Hug me..." she said coquettishly. Her eyes seemed to speak volumes, filled with deep affection.
I stepped into the water, knelt between her long legs, and slowly leaned down, stirring up a few drops of water.长
髮飘过，忽隐忽现的停在酥胸之上；暖暖的热水，粉红了她雪白的身体。
那是我的女人，美丽动人，又有着水晶般透明情感的女人。看着她会让人整
颗心都热烘烘的，沉浸在幸福裡。
我用手支撑着重量，怕压在她身上，会让她感到疲累。她用两手勾着我的脖
子，两个人的额头贴在一起，我亲了她嫩红的嘴唇一下。
『喜欢妳……』四片热唇交织着：「我也喜欢你……」
热吻，由轻柔到狂烈，由嘴唇到身体。不知不觉中，两个人的身上，留下了
对方深情的印记。
情慾悄悄的在体内堆积着，她的嘴唇红嫩而潮湿，气息沉重而短促，有力的
手指，像钳子般的紧紧抓在我的身上。
她张开了眼睛，那神采，是柔、是媚、是娇羞，炽热中盪漾着意乱情迷。蓦
Then I felt a gentle push from behind; she held me tightly, wanting to release her boundless desire.
I lightly wielded my paintbrush of passion, placing it on her smooth canvas, softly writing verses of love.
As the paintbrush brushed across the cracks of passion on the canvas, her body trembled, occasionally letting out soft moans. From the mysterious
cracks, strands of her private watercolors flowed, enticing the brush tip to slowly disappear into the crevice
.
"Ah…" she gasped heavily. Her intimate passage seemed to possess a life of its own, devouring
the paintbrush of passion.
Her legs were tightly wrapped around my thighs, and an octave of penetration reached the deepest part of her body.
That feeling seemed to reach straight to her heart, enveloping me layer by layer.
The tight folds of her vaginal canal, warm and elastic, sent waves of tingling
sensations … a feeling akin to intense desire, yet imbued with profound affection—the kind of
affection only felt when united with a beloved.
I loved making love with her, savoring the intimate intimacy between us. While a
man could make love with almost any beautiful and generous woman, only with a beloved could
he avoid the endless emptiness that followed the climax.
"Sam…" A high-pitched moan disrupted my thoughts. She patted my
back nervously, silently urging me to speed up.
Finally, she arched her back, her fingers gripping my arm tightly, a spasm followed by
calm .
I looked at her, her fiery red cheeks so captivating. We embraced gently, reluctant
to part …
until the surging emotions subsided, then we left the bathtub and dried ourselves.雯雯走去行
李包旁边，想要拿出新的衣服换上。
『先别穿了……』我由后面抱着她，在她耳边小小声的说着。
「为什么？」她转过身来。
『我……只是想多看一下嘛！』
「色sam，不会又想趁机偷吃豆腐吧！」脑袋被她轻轻的敲了一下。
『拜託嘛……』抓着她的手臂摇了半天，她才嘟着嘴走回床上。
我把枕头扶起来，靠在上面，由后面抱着她坐着，让自己的脖子，靠在她细
长的颈子上，闻着她身上的气息，感受着那份温暖。雯雯闭着眼睛，不知想些什
么。她长长的睫毛眨了一下，张开了眼睛看着我，眼神像是会看穿人似的。
「sam……你交过几个女朋友？」她摸摸我的脸颊，小小声的问着。
突如其来的问题，让我头脑一片茫然。
"Tell me..." she said coquettishly, shaking my shoulder, "How many people have you slept with?"
"Tell me...tell me...tell me..." she pouted.
'I...' I really didn't know what to say, constantly thinking about what to do.
"Sam...I just want to know..." she said softly, "Sam...I'm so jealous of them...
Sam...tell me...Sam...don't blame me for spoiling the mood, I really love you...Sam..."
I was lost in thought, never expecting her to ask such a pointed question. I only knew that no matter
what, I absolutely couldn't reveal that I was a lesbian, otherwise the problem would become very serious.
'I've only slept with two people...' I said, a little guilty.
'Which two?' she asked somewhat uncertainly.
'One is Xiao Hong, you knew her when we worked at the hotel.'
'Her...I vaguely remember her...'
'The other is you.'
'Really?'
I nodded.
'Then, do you love Xiao Hong?'
I shook my head.
"Then, why did you do it with her?"
"I didn't mean to, you know, back then, as a young master, you had to have a drink or
two !"
"And then?"
"You know, if the ladies got drunk, we young masters would always give them a ride home."
"Hmm?" "
One time when I was taking her home, she drank too much and couldn't climb the stairs, so I helped her up, and I accidentally went into
her room. I drank quite a bit that time, so… I accidentally…"
"You slept with her?" Her eyes sharpened.
"Yes, I'm sorry…" "
And then what? Was there a second or third time?" she asked, a little annoyed.
"Later… it happened a few more times…"
"Hmph!" Her face soured, as if she was a little jealous.
"Don't be angry, I didn't have a girlfriend back then! And I was young, so it's inevitable to have some physical needs
!" "
Oh...physical needs...tsk tsk..." She picked up her finger and gently scratched my cheek.
I looked at her with an honest and sincere expression. As for being a lesbian, of course, I couldn't say it under any circumstances,
not even in my dreams, not even if I was drugged!
"Then, will you treat me with all your heart?" Her eyes softened again, as if she were being coquettish.
"I will..." Actually, I didn't blame her. All women want to possess the man they love exclusively. And
almost all women will ask their beloved man how many women he has slept with.
She smiled so happily, as radiant as a sea of flowers in spring.
I don't know what she was thinking about, but a blush rose on her face.
"Sam..." She hooked her arms around my neck and rested her head next to my ear.
"Hmm?"
"Tell me, who do you feel most comfortable making love with?"
"Of course, it's you!"
"Why?"
"Because I love you."
"Just that simple?" She looked unconvinced.
"Actually, men are very simple creatures. They just go in, move around, and ejaculate—it's just a few
seconds of pleasure. The only difference is whether they like the girl or not… The psychological feeling far
outweighs the physiological difference."
"Hmm…" she seemed to understand. "Sam… when I'm with you, I belong only to you
…" She gently stroked me, looking at me intently. Her eyes were so full of affection: "Sam… I…"
很怕失去你……我很怕，自己第一个爱上的男人，会玩弄我的感情。」
『可怜的丫头，』我摸摸她的头髮：『我不会抛弃妳的……真的！』
「万一我变丑了呢？」
『妳不会变丑的啦！』
「但总有一天会老的嘛，到时候就丑囉！」她很哀怨的看着我。
『到时候我也老囉，也丑囉，大家就扯平囉！』我笑嘻嘻的哄着她。
「sam……我会为你穿上美美的衣服，为你擦上香香的香水……我要你永远
爱我。」
『雯……』我亲了她一下。那一瞬间，彷彿拥有全世界。
渡假回去的路上，我一直胡思乱想着。或许是太久没见着lesbi，也或许是被
雯雯所感动，有点想和lesbi提分手，只专心在雯雯一个人身上。 But I'm afraid that would be
too risky. What if Wenwen falls in love with another girl or boy in the future? I'd be left with nothing. Thinking about it another
way , if I broke up with Wenwen, she might hold a grudge against all the guys for the rest of her life. And I hate
seeing girls cry; no matter who I choose, one of them will inevitably get hurt. These two girls I love haven't done anything
to wrong me; asking them to break up is so difficult.
After thinking for a long time, I realized that everyone is busy in their second year of graduate school anyway. Maintaining the status quo might allow me to get through graduation, which would give me the opportunity
to continue having two relationships. If I get caught, it seems I can keep one of them from capsizing.
Besides, what if they both want to maintain a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship? Maybe I
can benefit from that. Thinking about it another way, they're so pretty; they could easily be pursued by others.
At least 'd still have one left.
Luckily, I have a science and engineering background. After using probability theory for a long time, I figured having two relationships was the option with the highest
expected value . Even if they meet again, that's a matter for the future.而且她们之间交情那么好，要是
肯两女共事一夫……天呐！真是美满而幸福的人生！想到此处，心裡一块大石落
了地，不禁有些得意。花东海岸看在眼中，又多美丽了几分。唉！谁要我命那么
好呢！有两个这么漂亮的女友在旁边，就算在学校会被男人追杀，我也愿意。
回到宿舍，推门进去，谦依旧在电脑桌前打着电动，天花板上的电风扇「嗒
嗒」响着，吹来阵阵热风。
『好久不见，近况可好哇？』
谦：「你回来啦！日子还不是差不多、差不多，倒是你家的女友常打电话来
咧！」
『她有没说什么？』
谦：「没耶，只有问你回来没有啦！」
『噢噢……酱子呐，有瞭有瞭。那你怎说的咧？』原本出门前忘了和lesbi说
要失踪几天，有点失策。
Qian: "You said you went back to your home in Taipei!" He turned around, his t-shirt pulled up to his stomach, revealing a bit of
his belly . Sitting at his computer all day made his stomach slightly protrude, and his skin was whiter than most of the girls in the school.
Qian: "Didn't you tell me you were going back to your home in Taipei? Why are your family calling to ask where you are
?"
"Oh! I was originally going home, but then a friend called, so I went to his house to play mahjong!"
Luckily, I reacted quickly; it wouldn't have been good if I'd slipped up.
Qian: "Oh, I see."
I breathed a sigh of relief; everything must be alright, I hadn't given myself away or been caught.
"Hey, did you go out with the round-faced senior?" I asked with a grin, looking gossipy.
Qian: "She didn't call, how could I have gone out?"
"Why didn't you call her? You're so stupid." "
Qian: 'Uh... I can play video games, but I can't use a phone.' He put on a pitiful expression.
The phone rang, and I ran over to answer it.
'Hello, who is this?'
'Sam~~ Have you missed me~~' Lesbi's coquettish voice came from the other end of the line.
'Waaah~~ I missed you so much~~' I pretended to cry as I pulled the long phone cord to the bed and
talked to her while lying down.
Qian turned around and made a face: 'Oh! I love you~~ Oh! Oh! Oh!' '
Who's yelling like that?' '
It's that old Qian!' I made a '凸' shape with my hand.
'Oh dear, there's a lighthouse here...'
'Old Qian, aren't you going to the office to write a report?' I covered the phone and said to Qian, winking
and trying to get him to leave for a moment."
Qian: "Okay, okay, I won't eavesdrop on your R-rated conversation anymore..." He stood up, pulled up his clothes, and
hid his fair belly inside.
"Uh... Lao Qian is going out." I said into the phone.
Qian: "I. Go. Take. Shower. Here~" He shouted into the phone from afar, making
a "凸" shape with his hand at me.
"Heh, Lao Qian got kicked out by you? You're so mean." She laughed happily on the other end of the phone, like
a clear, cloudless day.
Qian left the room with his clothes and washbasin, leaving only the noisy sound of the old fan rattling in the room
.
"I'm telling you, the landlady's little fat dog is sitting next to me... It must have fallen in love with me
, it runs in and out with me every day... Come... call me brother..." "
Heh... You have to speak to it in English, otherwise how will it understand!" Lesbi has a mysterious
magic; hearing her voice makes people feel cheerful.
"I'll let you in on a secret, that little male dog is really lecherous. He always wants to share a bed with me, and seeing him reminds
me of your lecherous face..."
'Wow, I've become the dog!' "
Huh? You're only just realizing that now... And I started calling him Sam, and he'd come running over obediently!" Good
heavens! I grabbed my notebook and copied this down: I can't keep a dog at home anymore... especially a male.
'That darn girl...'
"Hehe~~" She must have stuck out her tongue again; that look must have been so cute and playful.
We chatted on and on about a bunch of trivial things, but under her spell, I missed her
more and more . We talked until I was so desperate to go to the bathroom that I finally managed to hang up.
It's been so long since I've seen her. I wonder if she's gained or lost weight? Has she been watching her diet? Suddenly, I realized how much I miss
her.
I finally felt relieved after holding in a huge pee for so long. After using the toilet, I smoked a cigarette on
the balcony before returning to my room. To my surprise, I found a bottle of Tiger Balm on the table, with a small
note underneath: "Sam, clean up the hickeys on your neck! Qian."
Damn it! This is infuriating!
The next morning, as soon as I arrived outside Wenwen's lab, I heard the voices of the round-faced senior and junior.
Senior: "You scared me to death! Oh my god! Kill me already…"
Junior: "Don't even mention it, I was scared too!"
I pushed open the door and went in. "What is it? What is it?" I looked around.
Senior: "Sam…" She blinked and pointed at Wenwen. I looked her over carefully.
"Oh my god! Don't scare me…" I looked Wenwen up and down. She was wearing an orange off-the-shoulder
tank top and an orange tight-fitting short skirt, her long legs crossed, sitting casually in a chair. Her long hair was
down , half-covering her chest, her beautiful cleavage faintly visible, incredibly sexy. Imagining her walking on campus
, I was sure some boys would fall into the ditch just to see her.
"Sam, is it pretty?" Wenwen looked at me happily.
'...' I was startled, speechless.
Senior: "Are you going to make those stinky boys have wet dreams? Ugh... let me touch it!" She stood next to
Wenwen , gesturing towards her chest as if to pinch it.
Senior: "Wow!! R-rated!"
The two women tugged at each other for a while, then the round-faced senior, as if she'd discovered a treasure, suddenly ran in front of me
.
Senior: "Tell me... tell me... you heartless bastard, where did those two hickeys come from?!"
Her smile was full of gossip.
Oh no, I forgot to apply Tiger Balm and forgot to put on tape; I actually brought two hickeys to the lab. What a
blunder.
Senior: "Hahaha, with your looks, who would want to grow strawberries...it's hilarious!"
The senior was laughing so hard he was shaking.
Wen: "I grew them!" She said with a half-smile.
"Hahaha~~" Senior laughed so hard she bent over, almost rolling on the ground. The senior wasn't much better
off, tears streaming down his face, "Oh my god, Ivory can actually tell jokes..." He pulled the two of them,
laughing so hard they fell to the ground...
I felt a chill run down my spine. Wasn't she originally planning to keep it a secret? I looked at her, but my smile froze on my face.
It was a very strange thing.
Senior: "Sam, does he look good standing next to you?" She quickly pushed me next to Wenwen
, then she and the senior stood far away, tilting their heads, studying whether Wenwen and I looked compatible.
Senior: "We really don't seem to get along..."
It's strange, would he actually look good standing next to her? I really couldn't see it.
Wen: "Really!" She grabbed my hand: "Sam's my boyfriend!"
The senior students stared wide-eyed at me, then at Wenwen, their faces filled with disbelief.
Wenwen turned to me: "Sam, don't you love seeing girls in short skirts? Don't I
look ?"
"Very pretty..." I was still in shock.
Senior: "Oh dear... I'd better not be a third wheel!"
The senior nodded: "Yeah, yeah... I won't be a lighthouse either..." He helped the senior out of the lab.
Shouts of "Oh my god!" and "How is this possible!" echoed down the corridor.
Wenwen walked to the door, gently closed it, and turned back.
"Sam," she smiled happily, "Shall we go public with our relationship?" She wrapped her arms around my neck.
"Okay... okay..." I forced a smile.
"What's wrong? Are you unhappy?"
"You scared me." "Oh no, this is really bad, I don't know how to clean this up.
" "Hehe...doesn't it look good on me?" "
It's really sexy, are you going to make the boys at school bump into lampposts?"
She chuckled, "Really, this morning some boys kept staring at me, and then one of
them crashed into a lamppost on his bicycle." "
What a stupid boy, who told him to look at me like that, he'll be punished by heaven..." I pinched her cheek.
"If you like it, I'll wear it for you every day."
"Hmm...I need to buy insurance~"
"Why?"
"What if I get chased by those stinky boys?"
"Why would they chase you?" "
I'll kill them so I'll have a chance to chase you!"
She tapped me.
"Sam...can I come to your house in a couple of days?"
"My house?"
"Yes, to see your parents!"
"Please..." She grabbed my hand, shaking it and pleading.
"Okay...of course it's okay..."
She happily hugged and kissed me, but I started to worry about Lesbi, unsure how to handle the situation. I secretly
pulled open her camisole and peeked inside: "Wow! Red!"
"I was worried you'd get tired of seeing me always wearing black...just between you and me, my panties are red too!"
Oh! My nose is bleeding.
After a passionate day, I returned to the dorm feeling uneasy. I had been dreaming of having
two relationships , but seeing Wenwen like this, I knew I'd have to break up with Lesbi. One wrong move, and my beautiful dream
would definitely turn into a nightmare.
Qian was still silently playing video games, his white belly exposed, not saying a word.
"Huh, why isn't anyone saying anything?"
Qian: "Old Sam, you're such a bad friend!" "
Huh? What's wrong?"
Qian: "The hickey on your neck, was it from Wenwen?"
"How did you know?" Qian
: "Xiaowen's senior called and told me."
"This..." Gossip spreads faster than the speed of light at school.
Qian: "Weren't you originally going to introduce her to me? How come you got together with her first?"
"Sigh... I didn't mean to!"
Qian: "You already have a girlfriend, and you can't even be a little more discreet..." He looked rather unhappy.
"Old Qian, I'm sorry!"
Qian: "Never mind, never mind..." He waved his hand.
Qian: "So what are you planning to do next?" He pressed the pause button on his computer and turned around.
"Xiaowen wants to go public with their relationship, and I'm afraid it'll be terrible if Lesbi finds out."
Qian: "Then don't go public, it's that simple!" His mind was anything but simple.
"What can I do? Not only does she want to go public, she's also planning to visit my house, there's no way to hide it."
Qian: "So you're going to break up with Lesbi?"
"I... it seems like that's the only way!"
Qian: "You're such a womanizer, it's because of people like you that I don't have a girlfriend." He
looked at me with a mournful expression: "Big brother, please, give me one~~ even what you have left over~~ please~~" "
Wow, don't be so spineless... I'm afraid I'm in big trouble. If Lesbi finds out,
and she goes to Xiaowen and tells her, then I'm completely finished." "
Qian: 'So you just need to tell Xiaowen not to go public.' '
What can I do…' I shrugged. Even I couldn't think of a solution, let alone his inexperienced
ideas, which would likely be even less reliable.
Qian: 'Just say you're afraid of gossip, afraid of being ridiculed by classmates, afraid of being chased by her senior. You really need to find
a reason , even if you can't!'
'Uh…' Thinking about it, it actually makes sense.
Qian: 'Just say you don't like people gossiping about you.'
'Hmm… that's true, that's true.' Anyway, it's worth a try, even if the reason is far-fetched.
Even if it fails, at least I tried. Suddenly, I remembered that she had said before that she didn't want to go public with her relationship. Now it's my turn to not want
to go public , so we're even.
' The enjoyable holiday was coming to an end, and summer vacation was nearing its end. Next, I had to prepare to submit the outline for
my graduation thesis and the research plan.
The project with Wenwen was also nearing completion, and both professors were very satisfied with this close collaboration
." Then again, we've already gone all the way to bed together, how can you say we're not close?
With a mix of anxiety and anticipation, Lesbi was about to return to his country. Seeing that Wenwen wanted to go public with their relationship again, I wondered
what would happen if Lesbi found out. I was extremely worried and couldn't think of a solution, so I
reluctantly went to Wenwen to see if we could postpone going public.
I went to her lab, pushed open the door, and found her alone. She turned around and saw me,
a sweet smile blooming on her face.
"Sam... what brings you here?" She sat sideways, stretching out her arms for me to hug her.
"I missed you." I went over and hugged her.
"I missed you too."
I pulled up a chair and sat down next to her: "By the way, I wanted to tell you, I think... let's not go public with our
relationship yet, okay?"
"Oh? Why?"
"You're too beautiful. If word gets out, our institute might gossip all over the place, and that
would be embarrassing ." "
Aren't you afraid of people gossiping?"
I nodded. "Yeah, graduation is almost here, and I don't want to be bothered by gossip all the time. Besides, it'll be so awkward when I meet with
Teacher or Teacher Zhang."
"Ah! I almost forgot, your Teacher Chen is such a gossip."
"Yeah, yeah." I nodded. "If he gossips about me, I'll be in big trouble. I want to graduate alive!" "
Okay, whatever you say. So, when should I come to your house?"
"Okay, let's pick a day when everyone's free, and I'll come to my house to make an appearance." I breathed a sigh of relief and
happily kissed her cheek. It was warm and soft, so comfortable.
We've decided to postpone going public with our relationship for now.
I plan to find time to tell her as soon as Lesbi returns to the country that Wenwen and I are now a couple, and I hope she can forgive me. But secretly, I hoped
that Lesbi wouldn't want to part with Wenwen, or with me. If she agreed, maybe we could collaborate, which would be
a wonderful and beautiful scenario!
I wanted to pick Lesbi up from the airport, but her flight back home was at 2 a.m., and her dad would arrange a driver to take her back to
school , so she told me not to go. I didn't see her until that evening. Stepping into her dorm, I smelled that familiar
cigarette smoke again. I hadn't seen her for two months; she had lost a little weight, her hair had grown longer, and she looked even more charming.
"Did you miss me?" She ran up and hugged me, her eyes filled with the joy of a long separation.
"I really missed you!"
"You're so mean, I missed you so much." Suddenly, I felt something wet on my neck; she was crying.
"Silly girl, why are you crying?" I wiped her tears with the back of my hand.
She pouted, "I missed you...two months is such a long time..." She laughed and cried like
a child , "Let me tell you, I got sick as soon as I went abroad..."
"Huh? I didn't hear you saying that?"
"I got a strange illness called lovesickness, there's no cure, so pitiful, so pitiful!"
"Sigh...you got sick from missing your girlfriend, so pitiful..." I gently pinched her cheek.
"Waaah...no way! It's all your fault...you're bullying me..." She smacked my head
.
"Okay, okay, I won't tease you..." I said with a grin.
Being coaxed by her is one of life's greatest pleasures.
"Have a candy first." She picked up a bag of candy from the table and led me to sit on the bed.
I picked up a candy, peeled off its beautiful wrapper, and enjoyed its sweet taste.
"Oh right, I brought you a gift..." She skipped and hopped to open her bag, taking out a
pretty little box.
Inside was an antique-style lighter, with two small lines of text engraved on one side:
"For my dearest."
"Yao
." With a "clang," I opened the lid and lit a cigarette. This lighter was clearly quite valuable,
with a deep blue lacquer finish and exquisite craftsmanship; it was probably handmade.
"Thank you... I really love it!" I hugged Yao and kissed her. She loved me after all,
which was why she thought to bring me such an expensive gift back home.
We lay snuggled together on the bed, listening to her excitedly talk about her study abroad experiences. This long-awaited reunion allowed
me to once again enjoy the happy times we spent together. Those distant yet warm and familiar happy moments flashed
through my mind. I thought of the amazement I felt when I first saw her, of us grilling meat, fishing, and peeping at people making love; I thought...
That night at the motel, I thought about how despicable I was to lure her into bed; I thought about her
saying ; I thought about the days I spent thinking of her day and night. Beautiful memories, bit by bit.
I cried for her, laughed, felt sweetness, bitterness, and sourness. Two months of separation made me mistakenly believe I had forgotten
her, forgotten my love for her; even forgotten that she loved me too.
The river of time flows slowly. I was upstream, watching her leave; yet downstream, welcoming her back.
Making a promise to her was so heavy; perhaps I could make a promise to another woman. Two emotions, tangled
together , impossible to sever, impossible to unravel. Perhaps it was my own doing, I thought to myself.
"Sam... what are you thinking about? Please tell me?"
"I'm thinking about you."
"Oh, I'm right next to you." She lay on my chest, her smile still radiant.
"Hmm... thinking about the you of the past, thinking about me now."
"Is there any difference?"
People are the same, but hearts have changed.
"Tell me, what do you think about me and your girlfriend?" "
Actually, you two are different... I can't let go of either of you... I love her, but I love
you too." "
Let's have a beer!" I went to the refrigerator and took out two bottles.
"I've known her for a long time! Do you want to see some photos?"
"Hmm..."
She took out a photo album, spread it out on the bed, and flipped through it haphazardly. I saw Wenwen and Yaoyao posing in front of a
white Porsche.
"A Porsche? Oh my god!"
"Yeah, it was my car before. What's up?"
<23>
"Your family is that rich?" I almost blurted out.
Yaoyao was the mysterious "man" who picked Wenwen up from work in a Porsche at the hotel. Back then, her
hair was shorter, and her attire was more masculine.
"Sorry..." She kissed my cheek.
I didn't expect that the two of them had been dating for so long; their relationship must be very solid. If I tried to sneak in,
and it really turned into a clash of titans, I'd be the one who died.
"It's alright...it's because I'm from a poor family...sigh..." I made a face to hide my
unease.
So many intimate photos made my heart race, so I closed the album.
"What's wrong? Sweetie...don't be jealous...sweetie..." She patted my back.
"Waaah...I swear I'm not jealous..."
"Sam...it's a different world of emotions for her and for you. Besides...we've been together for so
many years, you can't just forget her like that...can you understand?" she said softly.
"Mmm..." I nodded. Yes, a different world of emotions.
"I've thought a lot these past two months abroad." She shifted her position, lying on my lap. "I've always
felt that she doesn't truly only love women; she's just running away from men. Running away from those who only care about her looks,
vulgar and arrogant. I believe that one day, she'll meet
a man who truly cherishes and loves her... Sam... I also hope to find someone I love to marry..."
I kissed her, my emotions a jumble.
"You're so good to me. I'm always so glad my girlfriend doesn't know you, otherwise, if she also fell for you,
I don't know what I would do." She stared at me blankly, gently stroking my cheek.
The annoying phone rang, and Yao Yao dashed over.
"Wen~~ I miss you, I miss you, I miss you~~"
"What's wrong? Are you unhappy? Who bullied you?"
"Hmm?" She listened silently.
「嗯……」
「下午不是还好好的吗？」
「难怪……觉得妳怪怪的……还以为太久没见造成的说……」
「是谁？谁家的美女？」
「妳说嘛……我保証不生气……」她有点着急的样子。
「是妳学长？不会吧？妳们做过了？」
「妳没有对不起我……不要紧的……」她点起一根烟。
「不必过来了，没关係。」
「今天先别提了，心情有点乱。」
「让我想一下再回答妳好不好？」
「我爱妳……嗯……掰……」她沉重的放下电话，愣愣的回过头来，眼神呆
滞而空洞。手上点着的烟，掉到了地上。
『妳家女友怎啦？』我担心的问着，隐约觉得大事不妙。
「没……没事……」她泪水滚滚而下，跑上前来，抱着我不放。
『怎啦？』我抱着她，心疼地摸着她的头髮。
"She doesn't want me anymore..." She burst into tears.
"Don't cry, don't cry..." I frantically grabbed a tissue and wiped her tears.
"How could this happen? How could this happen?" she murmured.
"What happened?"
"She fell in love with her senior..."
Hearing this shocked me, my head buzzing. I never expected Wenwen to
call Yaoyao to break up with her; it was completely unexpected.
"How could this happen?"
"I shouldn't have gone abroad... I shouldn't have gone abroad..."
"Sigh..." Seeing her so sad, my heart broke.
"Sam... what should I do? What should I do? She actually fell in love with a man..."
"Don't cry yet, go ask her again tomorrow!"
"I only have you left, don't leave me... Sam..."
"I..." I really hoped I wouldn't.
Yao Yao, like a wounded kitten, crouched in the corner of the bed, sobbing, "She doesn't want me anymore...she doesn't want me anymore...
why..."
I knew why, but I couldn't say it, and could only let her curl up in the corner and cry. Seeing my beloved heartbroken
, yet unable to help. My heart, like a thread being pulled, throbbed with pain; the thread pulled through my heart, only to
become tangled again.
I hated myself for my momentary greed, for making her cry. I hated myself, I hated...making love, for those few seconds
of pleasure in ejaculation, only to be rewarded with endless sorrow. I would rather only admire their beautiful figures, I hate myself!
Tears flowed uncontrollably.
"Don't think about her anymore, okay? Yao Yao...don't think about her anymore, I will always take care of you..."
"Really?" She looked at me sadly, as if I were her last straw.
"Really, I swear." My indecisive heart betrayed Wenwen again.
All the mistakes were mine.
"I love you, Sam..." She hugged me tightly...
"I love you too..." I kissed her, unsure whether it was a confession or an expression of endless apology.
"Sam...from today onwards, I'm only yours, and you're only mine. Okay?"
"Yes, I promise..." I nodded slowly. But, I didn't know what the future held.
"Thank you..." She smiled. Like a crying child receiving candy from her parents, her smile
was happy and radiant.
"Don't cry anymore..." I wrinkled my nose and gently pinched her cheek: "Shy face..."
"Yes! I'll be good!" She was just like a little child. "What's the reward for a good child?" She
blinked .
"Yes! A loving kiss!" I kissed her cute little lips, unable to let go for a long time.
My hand, unable to resist, slipped inside her clothes again, wantonly caressing her long-missed body. Passionate kisses
once more assaulted my chest.
The grief from before gradually intertwined with desire.
"I love you, Sam…I love you so much…" Her kisses rained down on me like raindrops.
On my face, ears, neck; on my lips, chest, and down.
The giant net of love tightened, binding us tightly together. Our clothes
became superfluous and cumbersome.
My clothes, her clothes, lay scattered on the floor. Our bodies refused to be separated for even a moment.
"Ah…Sam…" she trembled, letting me enter her…a soft whisper, echoing
in my heart once more.
It was that long-lost voice, that unyielding affection I couldn't bear to sever…
"I love you…" I cried out passionately.
The door was pushed open with a deafening crash.
"But I love you too!" I turned to see Wenwen kneeling on the floor.
Yao Yao looked at her, then at me. Her eyes, which had been full of warmth, turned to fear, then to sorrow, and finally to coldness and
indifference. She jumped off the bed and ran to Wenwen's side.
Yao: "I'm sorry, it's all my fault, I'm so sorry."
Wenwen didn't say a word, sitting on the floor, covering
her face I froze on the bed.
Yao: "Little Wenwen..." She reached out to hug Wenwen, but Wenwen pushed her away forcefully.
Wenwen looked up, at Yao Yao, then at me. Tears rolled down her cheeks, dripping onto the floor.
Time and space seemed to stand still.
"Wenwen, Yao Yao... please forgive me!"
Yao Yao's shoulders trembled, and she stared at me: "The 'senior' she was talking about, is it you?"
I slowly nodded.
Yao Yao's eyes also reddened, and she lowered her head, lost in thought. The room fell silent, the
alarm , accompanied by their soft sobs.
Yao: "Sam, please leave."
'Yao…'
Yao: "Go away!"
Yao Yao's lips were tightly pressed together, and Wenwen ignored me as well. The two sat on the ground, silent. I put on my clothes,
walked past them, glanced back, wanting to say something, but couldn't utter a word. My heart felt hollow, as if it had been ripped out
. The hot tears on my face couldn't undo the hurt I had caused them.
Dragging my heavy steps away, I kept looking back, but no one stopped me.
The autumn night wind was so cold.
Let time stand still here!
<24>
Postscript:
I opened my BBS mailbox, full of anticipation for a letter, only to be disappointed once again.
Petraka's sonnets played on the tape recorder. I picked up my antique blue lighter, lit a cigarette, and
pondered in my study.
The events of the night Yao Yao returned home were already buried deep in my memory. Distant and blurry, yet
vivid.
Wenwen knelt on the ground, weeping, without saying a word. After Yao Yao slapped me hard, she remained silent
. Did I love them? I think so. However, my hasty acceptance of their relationship brought me eternal sorrow.
That night, as I left the room, I looked back and saw the two of them crying in each other's arms. I tried to salvage
something , but it was too late.
A few days later, Yao Yao sent me a letter. She said she loved me and Wenwen, so she chose to leave. She
hoped I could focus on giving Wenwen a happy future.
I rushed to her dorm, but it was empty. My roommate said she had taken a leave of absence and planned to complete
her studies .
When I tried to find Wenwen, she always cried and wouldn't listen to my explanations. Finally, she moved out of the school, no longer going to the department building,
and I could no longer find her. Only a cassette tape remained, recording Petraka's "Sonnets" and Chopin's "
Farewell ."
And so, she left the graduate school and entered society. Wenwen, Yao Yao, and I were all lost in the vast
sea .
I've kept my old BBS account, hoping one day to receive
a message .
Greedily wanting two women was such a heavy mistake.
"Wenwen, Lingling, Sam, Yaoyao, dinner's ready..." Mom called from the kitchen.
I closed the empty BBS mailbox and turned off the hissing recorder. I went to the living room; my wife and
my twin daughters were playing on the floor.
"Didn't you receive the letter?" my wife asked, her voice full of concern.
A bitter smile said it all.

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