Being coquettish is a psychological need for women.

page views:1 Publication date:2012-02-12

In public, women are often reasonable and gentle, a key factor in social harmony. Why do they change so much in front of the men they love, becoming somewhat irrational? Psychologists believe that once a woman falls in love, she becomes childlike, preferring to speak in a soft, childlike voice, enjoy sucking (kissing), and like to act coquettishly (or playfully). In other words, love easily makes women irrational, a phenomenon that can be traced back to basic needs in infancy. It seems that women's tendency to act strangely in front of the men they love is innate. Understanding this, wouldn't men be more peaceful, tolerant, and even compassionate towards women's strategic displays of affection?
When women return home, they often use witty remarks or even ironic statements when speaking to their unfortunate husbands, much like the trend of wearing underwear as outerwear. When she calls you a "deadbeat," a "bad guy," or even a "scoundrel" or a "heartbreaker," don't rush to defend yourself or get angry. She wouldn't utter such "vicious curses" to someone who has nothing to do with her. Thinking this way will prevent you from being easily hurt or saddened. The saying "spare the rod and spoil the child" applies here.
Women appreciate empathy and are most afraid of their men having "disloyalties." Consequently, they care most about whether their husbands have processed what they say, or whether their body language is believed and accepted by them, leading to an appropriate response. For example, if your wife comes home from work kicking her high heels and chairs, throwing pillows, and blowing her bangs (because she doesn't have a beard), and then talks about how a colleague is smug and how her boss is bored and biased… as a husband, firstly, you shouldn't argue; you should stand by her side and help her. Secondly, don't offer serious advice. If you rush to give her a lesson in interpersonal relationships, it will backfire, because she understands social dynamics better than you… If this doesn't work and that doesn't work, are you helpless? The most effortless and effective response is: "I understand, you've really been wronged! Here, have some water to calm down!" At this moment, what the wife needs is this kind of supportive "public opinion" and the "empathy" of her family. For example, if she says "I'm so cold," she means "hug me"; if she says "get some rest," it might be hinting that "there's something going on tonight"... Love can improve a man's emotional intelligence, provided you pay attention and try to understand. For instance, a woman's complaining isn't the goal; the real purpose is expression. Nagging is a wife's way of expressing herself. Most women know how to express their inner emotions, which is why they live longer than men. They crave a loyal listener to share their inner secrets. The difficulties women talk about aren't necessarily about getting their husbands to solve practical problems; they often need to use sharing, communication, and discussion to solidify their intimacy and strengthen their sense of security in the relationship. Men, on the other hand, believe that problem-solving is more important and don't need to spend so much time talking about feelings and thoughts. This is somewhat like sexiness: men focus on the climax, women focus on the process. A wife can endure a night without light and wait for her husband to come home to change a light bulb. Although it's a small favor, she enjoys it because she experiences the joy and beauty of being cared for and valued.

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Being coquettish is a psychological need for women.

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