My Story with Jingxi

page views:1 Publication date:2023-03-23

In April, Beijing was starting to warm up, and girls were beginning to wear short skirts, but all were wearing stockings to ward off the sudden chill of early spring. One night, I finished class, and the classrooms on the entire office floor were empty. As I walked down the corridor, I suddenly saw a girl still studying through a crack in a half-open classroom door. She was wearing an ordinary coat and a short skirt, high heels, and bright red stockings. Compared to ordinary flesh-colored stockings or the occasional black stockings, this unusual red piqued my curiosity and even aroused my desire to explore this girl.

However, that night I just stood quietly to the side, like a perverted voyeur, staring intently as she stood up and walked past me. As we brushed past each other, she glanced at me. She wasn't a top-tier beauty, but she had a foxy, alluring gaze.

To my surprise, the next day, during my oral English class, we unexpectedly met again. She sat in the front row, staring at me the entire time, like a normal girl listening to a lecture. Every time our eyes met, my heart would pound at her gaze, and I couldn't help but scrutinize her from head to toe. She was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, but now she had changed into a pair of slightly thicker gray stockings. The plain color seemed to be trying to prove that she was an ordinary girl, but it couldn't suppress the desire in her eyes that I perceived.

After working for many years, I've basically developed the ability to read whether a girl's eyes harbor desire for my body. Some of these looks are just curiosity, some are teasing, and some are utter possessiveness and domination. The way she looked at me seemed to want to devour me whole.

The moment class ended, my gaze remained fixed on her, watching her slowly stand up and gather her things, as if waiting for everyone in the classroom to leave. She was, after all, a girl, and when she saw me staring at her like that, her gaze instinctively averted shyly. When she walked to my side, we both smiled awkwardly.

She asked me some professional questions, we exchanged phone numbers, and she told me her name and basic information: her name was Jingxi, she was from Tianjin, a junior at a prestigious 985 university in Beijing, majoring in journalism, the vice president of the student union, and the head of the radio station.

That night, I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, my mind filled with her sharp eyes and unspoken desire. I couldn't help but text her: What are you doing?

Her reply surprised and excited me: So late, doesn't the teacher have a sex life?

I said: I'm single, why would I have a sex life?

She said: I don't believe you, you seem like a very casual person.

I said: Really, I'm single now, no girlfriend. What about you? Do you have a boyfriend?

She said: No! Because I consider myself a very casual person, I can find someone whenever I want.

I asked: How casual can you be?

Her answer was a bit overwhelming: I can meet someone I like anytime.

That night, talking to her, she frankly revealed a lot of shocking things to me, about herself and about the teachers at the school. I realized then how chaotic the teacher-student relationships were here.

She said she was very casual about sex, flirting directly with any guy she liked without any pretense. From high school onwards, she seduced all sorts of guys, including classmates and young men from outside the community. During her three years of university, she slept with almost every decent-looking junior student around her, to the point that she developed an aversion to handsome men. She said her most outrageous experience was when she met a balding, greasy middle-aged man with a wife and children while working at McDonald's. For some reason, she suddenly felt a strong urge to try it, so she seduced him with her eyes and followed him into the restroom. The middle-aged man lewdly kissed her, trying to have sex with her. She suddenly felt disgusted but didn't want to anger him, so she gave him oral sex.

After hearing these astonishing stories, I weakly asked her: "What do you think of me?" Her answer disappointed me: "So-so. You teachers are all quite arrogant, sometimes annoying." I said: "Have you ever dated a teacher like me?" She said: "My current boyfriend is my oral English teacher."

I was about to say, "Isn't your spoken English teacher me?" But then it dawned on me: Could she be talking about Mike, our workplace's spoken English tutor?

I'd heard stories about Mike before; when I first joined, colleagues were already saying he was a womanizer on par with Edison Chen, using his tutoring job to hook up with naive female students. He claimed to be American, but based on his pronunciation, appearance, and skin color, I strongly suspected he was a conman from Eastern Europe or the Arab world.

Learning that Jingxi's boyfriend was Mike, I was somewhat disappointed and immediately abandoned my fantasies about her, ending the conversation.

However, a few days later, she texted me: "I'm at McDonald's, can you pick me up? It's raining and I can't get a taxi." I asked about her boyfriend, and she replied, "We broke up."

When I drove to the McDonald's where she was, she was sitting in a chair, staring blankly out the window. I asked, "Are you leaving now?" She suddenly said she was hungry and asked if I could buy her a hamburger. I said, "Of course." I said, "Are you out of money?" She said she'd already spent all her money for the month. I asked if she didn't ask her boyfriend for some. She said, "I give him all the money." I wanted to ask why she broke up with him, but I held back.

After a long silence, she suddenly said, "I don't want to go back to my dorm. Can I stay at your place?" I said, "I share an apartment with others, it's not very convenient. How about we go to the nearby Hilton?" She said, "Sure, but is such a nice hotel necessary?" I said, "I'm a Virgo." She looked at me and smiled knowingly, then lightly kicked me under the table with her foot, saying, "You're so annoying!" I looked down and was somewhat disappointed to find that she wasn't wearing those stockings I'd been dreaming about, just ordinary jeans.

On the way to the Hilton, we were both silent, the atmosphere a little awkward. Just as we arrived at the hotel, she broke the silence and asked, "Could you give me some extra IELTS speaking practice later?" I said, "Depends on your performance."

That night, after arriving at the hotel, I asked the front desk if they had any standard rooms. The front desk replied that they didn't, only business suites, which I remember clearly: 3000 yuan a night.

The suite was indeed very large; the entrance led to the living room, and the bedroom was just inside.

One of the fun things about booking a room in such a large business suite is that it's easy to lose your clothes afterward.

As soon as Jingxi and I entered, we started kissing and quickly undressing, then carelessly tossed our clothes aside. Hats and scarves were left by the door, coats on the sofa, pants on the carpet leading to the bedroom, and four shoes scattered by the bed—a complete mess from the living room to the bedroom.

When I pounced on her on the bed, I was only wearing my underwear, and she was only wearing a bra.

I kissed her passionately, but she seemed unhappy with my forceful approach. With a quick leap, she turned the tables and pinned me beneath her. Then, she began exploring my body with her mouth and nose, like a little wildcat. Soon, this cat found her prey on my body: the "big rat" between my legs. But the mouse was wrapped in a white cloth printed with Calvin Klein, so the cat used its mouth to grab the cloth and tugged it off my leg.

It was my first time experiencing this trendy way of undressing, so I asked her, "Do you always take off your boyfriend's underwear like this?" She said, "He always does this to me, I learned it from him."

I felt a pang of jealousy, flipped her over, pinned her down, and used my teeth to remove her panties. To my surprise, her pubic area wasn't covered in pubic hair, only a few sparse strands. This was also the first time in my life I'd encountered a girl who had shaved her pubic hair. Curious, I asked her why, and she replied, "My ex-boyfriend liked it, so I just shaved it recently, and it's only just grown back a little bit." Then, I asked her if she wanted me to give her oral sex, and she nodded.

The moment my tongue touched her vulva, she screamed loudly, grabbing my head tightly with both hands, her nails digging into my scalp.

Jingxi was a very domineering girl during sex; she didn't care about feelings when making love with her. That day, she sat on top of me the whole time, and every time I tried to get up, she would push me down instantly.

She kept writhing on top of me, sometimes squeezing my ribs, rubbing my penis up and down, sometimes moving back and forth to facilitate full intercourse.

After a while, she got tired, leaned down, grabbed my hair, and kissed me, stuffing mouthfuls of saliva into my mouth.

When my penis went limp from fatigue, she would give me oral sex, quickly and effectively restoring its hardness. Then she would turn her back to me and use her anus to take my penis in and out, then take it in again.

With continuous thrusting, a lot of fluid flowed from her genitals. I guessed it wasn't flowing out, but gushing out. Perhaps without realizing it, she had already achieved the ultimate orgasm on my body: squirting.

Afterwards in bed, I lit a cigarette and held her. She asked me for one too, smoking it skillfully.

I asked her how my skills in bed compared to Mike.

She said, "Both of you are far inferior to my ex-boyfriend. "

I was extremely jealous, but outwardly calm, I asked her about her ex-boyfriend.

She said her ex-boyfriend was a sports student at the Tianjin Sports School, proficient in long-distance running, basketball, and fitness. He could make her faint during sex, and the pleasure he gave her was incomparable to that of weak scholars like us.

I was somewhat displeased, but I restrained myself and asked her, "Do you take the initiative like that when you're with your boyfriend?" She said, "No way. My boyfriend is very dominant and likes violence." I said, "So, do you prefer being violently fucked by a man, or violently fucking a man?"

She said, "I'm okay with either. I can be dominant or submissive. If the man is weak, I'll take the initiative. If the man is dominant, I'll be passive."

I thought to myself: This bitch is actually implying that I'm weak! Then I secretly resolved that if I were to hook up again, I wouldn't be as weak and helpless as I was today.

The second time we hooked up, I initiated it, saying there was a newly opened love hotel nearby and I wanted to try it out. She readily agreed.

The room we booked that day was a strange one, with mirrors on all four sides—it was even a little creepy. During sex that day, from the very beginning, I firmly controlled the situation, pinning her down and thrusting.

But this monotonous and boring way of making love didn't seem to arouse her interest. She was like a dead fish, letting me thrust on top of her without much pleasure.

I decided to add some spice to our sex life, so I picked up her stockings that she had thrown on the bedside table and tugged at them a few times, showing off. She asked me, "What are you doing?" I didn't say much, just wrapped the stockings around her neck several times, and every time I penetrated her, I would pull the stockings to both sides, tightly choking her neck. Then I pulled out my penis, loosened her stockings, and thrust it back in forcefully, tightening my grip on her neck again.

She seemed affected by this perverse behavior; her breathing became rapid, and her lower body began to writhe with excitement. The slight feeling of suffocation amplified her pleasure.

This excitement, in turn, affected me, accelerating my adrenaline and making my lower body even more aroused. My thrusts became increasingly forceful, each impact heavier than the last, the force of the impact even causing her body to move slightly upwards. I had expected this excessively violent sexual assault to make her uncomfortable, but instead, her response was deep breathing, rapid moans, and rapid up-and-down movements between her legs. To make it easier for me to fuck her hard, I reached behind her head, grabbed her hair, and pulled downwards to stabilize her body; to maintain her suffocation, I gripped her neck with my right hand, fucking her like a perverted rape. Soon, from her eyes filled with a mixture of fear and pleading, and from the warm flow emanating from her vagina, I sensed she was about to experience a massive orgasm. At the moment of her climax, I tightly sealed her mouth with a kiss, preventing her from crying out. At the time, it was just instinct, but later I read that covering a woman's mouth during orgasm can suppress the energy that should be released, effectively enhancing the pleasure. This is also one of the purposes of using a mouth gag in SM.

Not long after her climax, Jingxi rolled over, her buttocks facing me, indicating she wanted to be penetrated from behind. I saw the stockings I had just tied around her neck were still there, so I grabbed both ends of the stockings, held them to my hand, and pulled them back forcefully. Jingxi's head was instantly pulled high, and she cried out loudly, like an untamed mare. Without hesitation, I raised my penis, aimed it at her vagina, and thrust it in, instantly being completely swallowed by her opening. The immense impact almost caused her body to lose control. So I tightly tightened the stockings, pulling her head back from its forward swing, controlling her entire body and stabilizing her. Then came the second insertion, the reins pulled back, and the hold steady. The third, the fourth—the stockings' reins rhythmically bent and tightened, her throat moving in sync with the rhythm, uttering whimpering moans.

Soon, she reached another climax, collapsing onto the bed in a limp state, while I remained full of energy. So, after she had rested for just a minute, I jumped off the bed, grabbed her ankles, dragged her body to the edge of the bed, and began to penetrate her from behind, her body limp as mud. Although she was somewhat exhausted, she continued to emit wanton, dog-like moans, proving she was still enjoying it. Looking at her head buried in the sheets, I suddenly wanted to see her expression, so I grabbed her hair and pulled it back sharply, until her face was facing the ceiling, which I could see clearly. I leaned in and pressed my face against hers, asking, "Do you like it when I do this to you?" She stammered, "I...like..." I continued, asking her, "Who's better, you or your boyfriend?" She said, "He's better."

I flew into a rage, grabbing her hair and slapping her buttocks several times, then retaliating by thrusting hard into her genitals. I grabbed her face, forcing her to look up at me, and asked, "Who's better?" She finally gave in, saying, "You're better."

Her verbal affirmation made me even more frenzied in my fucking, causing her to scream even louder. She was like a wild horse beneath me, her body under my control, her dignity destroyed, reflected in the mirrors of the room, filling the room with an atmosphere of lewdness.

Finally, just before I ejaculated, I made her beg me to ejaculate inside her, and to say it loudly and clearly. Already lost in the pleasure, she obediently said, "I want you to ejaculate inside me." So I thrust hard, pouring my millions into her body.

In a sense, Jingxi was a turning point in my approach to sex. From that sexual encounter with her, I realized that many women crave violent or even abusive sex far more than gentle, playful intimacy. Most women are tired of the routine sex with their boyfriends day after day, and deep down they yearn for different treatment, even being treated like a bitch, brutally fucked, beaten, and bullied. Later,

I read a psychology book that further confirmed my view. The book posed the question: Do women have an innate masochistic tendency? The answer was: Yes, women do.

According to Freud's theory, every form of pain contains the potential for pleasure. A man's sexual desire is often mixed with aggression and a desire to conquer. Biologically speaking, if he doesn't use methods different from other courtship to conquer his sexual partner, the woman finds it uninteresting. When the sexual instinct combines with the aggressive instinct, if directed at an external sexual object, it becomes rape; if directed inward, it becomes sexual masochism.

We can call this instinct that promotes the act of devouring and being devoured the sadomasochistic instinct. The instincts of sadism and masochism are the beginning of love.

The book contains a passage that states: "Women possess an innate sense of guilt regarding their physiological desires. This leads to a contradictory psychology of anticipating and avoiding pleasure. Consequently, they desire to be in a passive and unfree state while experiencing pleasure, finding suitable justifications for the release of their desires and accepting the punishment associated with pleasure." Deep down, women crave suppression, invasion, and submission, which manifests in the fact that most women are attracted to roguish, bad-boy, and domineering men. They enjoy being suppressed and subjugated. In sexual intercourse, this is often reflected in the intensity and roughness, which they find most pleasurable. When a woman's masochistic tendencies are aroused, her body naturally produces a strong reaction.

Pain, violence, sex, and love all cause the release of many hormones and compounds within the body. Furthermore, when people see, hear, or imagine such activities, the sympathetic nervous system responds. Testosterone levels are temporarily affected by the role played in SM. The sadist's testosterone levels typically increase, while the masochist's typically decreases. The body releases endorphins when experiencing pain. This can lead to pleasure and addiction. Furthermore, the adrenaline and norepinephrine released during stress and pain can lead to pleasurable "excitement," or sexual arousal.

Returning to my story with Jingxi, it's fair to say that Jingxi unlocked my inner male chauvinism and sadistic tendencies. After her, in sex with almost no woman, I almost never acted as gently as before, but rather became proactive, aggressive, and possessive, driven by a desire for control and dominance.

This is perhaps an inevitable stage in a boy's journey to manhood!

After a few casual encounters, Jingxi went abroad and we never contacted each other again. I could only occasionally see some updates and photos of her studying abroad on the school's online community.

[The End]

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